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#my anxiety is a liar! i even wore them during a full shift at work just cause abs i got sm compliments and my manager wouldn’t stop calling
avatardoggo · 2 years
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rose tinted pov all summer long
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Roommates - Theo x Reader
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(gif source)
Summary: y/n’s landlord is increasing her rent once her lease is up. She has two options: move out or find a roommate. Theo, coincidentally, is looking for a new apartment.
Word count: 2105
Warnings: cursing, theo being a total house husband
a/n: and they were roommates
master list
“So then he finds out that Leia is his sister and- y/n, are you even listening?” Stiles cut himself off and looked over to where the y/h/c was nervously bouncing her leg. y/n’s head snapped up when she heard her name, nearly dropping her phone in the process.
“Uh, yeah, of course! I just um, keep going, I’m listening,” she replied unconvincingly. Her odd behavior caught the attention of the rest of the pack - not that they were really paying much attention to Stiles’s retelling of Star Wars: Return of the Jedi - causing the previous conversation to be forgotten.
“Okay, spill. There’s a handful of mostly human polygraphs in here and you’re a terrible liar. What’s up?” Malia grilled, looking at y/n expectantly. 
“It’s really nothing, everything’s fine,” y/n squeaked out, her ability to lie getting worse and worse with each word. After receiving another pointed look from Malia, she finally cracked. “Ugh, fine. I just got an email from my landlord that he’s bumping up the rent when my lease is up and I can’t afford to stay there by myself anymore,” y/n ranted. The group, minus y/n, glanced around at each other with frowns. Each and every one of them would drop everything to help y/n, but it just so happened that they were all already stuck in leases or didn’t have any extra rooms at their homes. After a few moments of silence, Theo piped up.
“I could be your roommate and split the rent if you want,” he offered nonchalantly. Stiles looked between Theo and y/n as if they’d both grown two heads. Before y/n could decline the offer, Theo continued. “My lease is almost up and your place is much nicer anyways. It’s a win win,” Theo pointed out casually and leaned back deeper into the cushions. 
An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment as y/n mulled it over. It wasn’t a horrible idea. Having a chimera as a roommate was basically like having a top-of-the-line security system. Plus, between being a full-time student and working part-time, y/n was hardly home so it didn’t really matter who her roommate was, just as long as they did their fair share of chores.
“Sure, why not,” y/n replied warmly.
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It had been about a month since Theo moved in. Aside from sleeping, y/n had spent very little time at their now shared apartment. If she wasn’t at school or working, she was spending time with the pack, which felt like a full time job in and of itself. Too bad they weren’t getting paid to keep the whole damn city safe. For what felt like the first time in months, y/n finally had an entire weekend off. No looming deadlines from her classes. No long and grueling shifts for work. No supernatural threats. 
When she got home that Friday night she dropped her purse by the door, toed her shoes off halfway through the room, and unceremoniously flopped down onto the couch, sighing loudly as she did so. 
“Well hello to you too,” Theo called as he entered the room stealthily. y/n jumped, startled by his presence.
“Jesus, I didn’t even know you were home. What are you, a ninja?” y/n asked, chest heaving slightly.
“Something like that,” Theo smirked, earning an unimpressed eye-roll from y/n. Theo moved to sit down on the couch next to her, making sure to leave a respectful distance between their bodies, and kicked his feet up on the coffee table. “So, you’ve been busy,” Theo began, striking up a light conversation. y/n snorted and leaned her head back into the cushions.
“You’ve got that right,” y/n groaned, running a hand through her tousled hair. The last thing y/n expected when Theo moved in was for him to be willing to hear her vent about school and work, but he actually seemed to enjoy the conversation and company. She told him about her lazy group project members and the sleazy old men who came to the diner she waitressed at. She told him how poetic justice had been served when one particularly disgruntled customer slipped and fell on the drink that he’d intentionally spilled when a waitress wouldn’t give him her number. Theo actually laughed in response to that story, his gleeful chuckle brought a warm smile to y/n’s face. 
“I didn’t mean to unload on you, thanks for listening though,” y/n finished shyly. Theo brushed off her comment.
“That was entertaining, thank you,” Theo replied with his signature grin. y/n felt heat rise to her cheeks but turned away before Theo could notice.
“Anyways… as much as I’d love to not move from this couch for the next 48 hours, I should probably clean up a bit. I’ve been a pretty shitty roommate,” y/n grimaced as she forced herself off of the couch. Theo gave her a puzzled look and patted the spot next to him on the couch, rolling his eyes when she seemed unwilling to sit back down.
“You’ve hardly been here since I moved in. I don’t think you’ve eaten a meal here, much less made a mess. Except for maybe your shoes in the middle of the floor,” he pointed out, gesturing towards her anti-slip waitressing sneakers. y/n’s face continued to burn as she moved to kick the shoes towards the shoe rack by the door. Naturally, she turned to sarcasm as a defense mechanism.
“What shoes? I don’t see any shoes,” y/n quipped slyly, waltzing back across the room to once again sink into the couch. Theo chuckled wordlessly at her antics and tore his eyes away from her to look at the TV.
“Friends or The Office?”
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As luck would have it, y/n’s free weekend was short lived and the following Monday she was back to her never ending stream of school work and back-to-back work shifts. Fortunately, she was able to run home during her lunch break and wisely chose to use the time for a well-deserved nap. As she pulled out her keys to open the apartment door, she heard mechanical humming coming from inside. Truth be told, she had yet to figure out what kind of roommate Theo was, much less come close to understanding the walking enigma, so she had no idea what she was about to walk into. Was he building something? Did he figure out a way to bring the dread doctors back? Was he doing something unspeakable with a lady friend that would surely scar y/n for years to come?
As y/n mentally prepared herself for the horror movie that she was expecting to walk into, she inserted her keys in the lock. I need a fucking nap, whatever weird shit going on behind this door be damned. She pushed the door open with tense shoulders and hesitantly peered into the apartment. There stood Theo. Not holding any tools, not actively in cahoots with the nightmarish scientists that occupied part of their high school days, and (thank God) fully clothed...
But vacuuming.
Her murderous, half-human, former dirt bag roommate was vacuuming. Like a bona fide house husband. 
Theo heard the door softly close shut behind y/n and he turned to face her, unplugging the vacuum machine in the process.
“What’s with all of this?” y/n asked hesitantly, gesturing vaguely to the vacuum cleaner and the various cleaning supplies set out on the coffee table. Theo glanced at the area around him, proud of his work.
“I had some time to kill so I figured I’d clean up a bit. I’m pretty much done now so I shouldn’t bother you if you’re studying or…” he trailed off, giving y/n an opportunity to fill in the blank.
“Ha, I probably should, but no. I will be dead asleep for the next thirty minutes and then I have to head to the diner for a double shift,” she groaned and shrugged off her jacket as she made her way towards her room. Considering the fact that it was only noon on a Monday, y/n seemed far too tired. Theo frowned for a moment and genuinely considered going to have nice civilized chats with her manager and professors. That’s probably a bad idea though. Unless...
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For some reason unbeknownst to y/n, her professors had begun to show some mercy in the number of papers and projects they assigned. Her manager at the diner even offered to decrease the hours she worked each week if she was feeling overwhelmed. Theo wore a knowing grin when a joyful y/n came home one day and explained this all to him. If y/n caught his mischievous smirk, she certainly didn’t call him out on it. With all of her newfound free time, y/n decided that she wanted to host a pack movie night at their apartment.
“Alright, the pizza is on the way and Scott is bringing snacks. We should probably get the movie set up before Stiles gets here and somehow convinces us all to watch Star Wars again,” y/n rattled off while she paced the apartment to make sure everything was in order. “I washed a bunch of blankets earlier, could you take them out of the dryer and put them on the couch?” y/n requested as she anxiously walked to the kitchen and began pulling out plates and cups. Theo nodded gently as he popped into the kitchen to check things out.
“Don’t stress too much. As long as there’s people and pizza, everyone will be happy,” Theo said, attempting to ease her anxiety. y/n smiled lightly at his words and took a deep breath. Lately he seemed to have some magical ability to calm her down. Theo left the kitchen to take care of the blankets while y/n put together a makeshift snack bar, complete with plates, bowls for snacks, and beer. The pizza and most of the pack arrived just as y/n and Theo were finishing up with their respective jobs. The pizza delivery boy seemed a little scared by the tall, muscled men and tiny but mighty women surrounding him so she gave him a decent tip and rolled her eyes at her friends’ naturally intimidating nature. After y/n ushered them all inside and set the pizza down on the kitchen counter, she joined the rest of the pack in the living room. To her surprise, the blankets had been neatly set out around the room and folded with expert precision. She sent Theo an impressed smile and winked when she thought no one was looking.
Stiles was the last to arrive and much to his disappointment Ghostbusters had already been set up on the TV. It didn’t take long for everyone to grab food and get situated around the living room, so by the time y/n was done buzzing around the apartment like a madwoman to get everything situated there was only one spot left on the couch. y/n knew that her friends - aside from Stiles - weren’t actively trying to hurt Theo’s feelings, but seeing him tucked into the corner of the couch distanced away from everyone pained her more than she’d admit.
So, she did what any good friend would do. Not only did she gladly take the spot on the couch next to him, but she also casually tossed her legs over his and covered the two of them with a blanket. The action definitely earned her a few raised eyebrows, including from Theo, but no one dared to call them out. y/n was able to easily ignore the sideways glances they earned throughout the course of the movie, mostly because she had fallen asleep about 15 minutes in. By the end of the movie her head had fallen to lazily rest on Theo's shoulder and he had subconsciously pulled her in closer to his side.
After the movie finished and they spent some time catching up, the rest of the pack began to trickle out of y/n and Theo’s apartment. Lydia was the last to leave so she offered to lock the door behind her so that Theo wouldn’t have to move and wake y/n. Lydia tossed out a few stray cups on her way out the door, and because she was never one to tell secrets, she definitely didn’t send the girls a picture of Theo and y/n now both passed out and cuddling on the couch.
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a/n: this seemed like a great idea in the shower and now i’m not sure i even like it but i hope you enjoyed :)
edit: enjoy my best friend’s live reaction to this fic
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ilovemygaydad · 6 years
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part 5/? of punk!patton gets adopted by single parent logan
part one - part two - part three - part four - ao3 version - masterlist (includes asks and art!)
pairings: moxiety, eventual logince, background pining remceit, mentions of past thomas/female oc
warnings--these are very important this chapter: food mentions, stress, anxiety, kissing, flirting, divorce mentions, making out, mentions of murder (i’ll mark it out), attempted murder, guns, gunshots, gun wounds, head trauma, homophobic parents mention, homophobia, there’s so much swearing i am so sorry, maybe something else
a/n: no joke i’ve had this planned out since before the last part came out, but i literally just couldn’t write it all at once, and i’ve been having a really emotionally weird week. next chapter should start out pretty funny. idk. please enjoy this.
a/n 2: sorry that this took so long to get out. i don’t think it’s that great, but... yeah. whatever.
it’s friday night babey which means that it’s dinner time with the sanders, and logan and patton are freaking out
logan has been cooking/prepping food for the past day, and he immediately started finishing up as soon as he got home from work
patton, on the other hand, was feverishly cleaning the entire house 
it isn’t even messy, but he’s worried that virgil and/or roman are going to be upset
(which they aren’t????? but whatever)
and patton even cleaned himself up! he tried (and failed) to tame his wild curls into some sort of neat anything, and he wore his nicest pair of black jeans and a black sweater with floral designs that he’d bought at the mall with virgil a while back
it was a little out of his comfort zone, but virgil insisted that he get it because it looks very good on him
and, god damn it, you can’t say no to virgil’s puppy eyes
the doorbell rang just before five, and logan ran out of the kitchen to get it
patton literally vaulted over the couch, skidding to the door just behind logan
virgil is like
literally the cutest person on the planet
he’s wearing a white lace dress that has a flowy skirt, and he’s got a white flower crown on, and he looks like an angel
during the time that patton’s being a gay disaster, virgil holds out a bouquet of blue flowers and says, “dad made me get them for you”
patton smiles gently and takes them, pulling virgil in for a quick kiss before leading him inside
roman has, like, eight giant tupperware containers full of cookies and brownies and stuff in his arms, and logan’s like
what???? the fuck?????
“you didn’t need to bring desserts, roman. i have ice cream...”
and roman gives this cocky smile and says “my best friend, emi, loves to bake for us, but he doesn’t really know how to limit himself, so we have tons of baked goods lying around that we can’t eat. not to mention that i can’t keep up this fabulous figure if i only eat sweets!” wink wonk
and logan can feel his face heating up after that wink, but he pretends that it’s just the heat from inside
roman really does have a good figure...
logan chooses to not respond to roman, instead saying, “let’s go inside so you can put those containers down”
they turn to go, and they catch a glimpse of patton and virgil from down the hall
the kids are sitting on the couch, laughing and talking and exchanging the occasional kiss
the adults watch for a second because aw, but quickly move on to the kitchen
“you can set the containers down on the counter over there. i made a a couple of different things for dinner just in case you two didn’t like something that i made, so there’s spaghetti, pizza, and hamburgers. everything is absolutely gluten-free; i know because i triple checked with a list online and bought new utensils to reduce contamination. you’re free to have as much or as little as you like--i won’t be offended either way.”
roman kind of freezes because holy shit that’s so thoughtful and kind
“that’s... logan, that’s too much. you didn’t have to do all that for virgil.”
“what are you talking about? it’s only common courtesy to assure that your guest is able to eat without getting sick, especially when they have a disease that can cause irreparable damage to their body.”
“yeah, but a lot of people don’t care enough to ask or remember, so virgil often has to find something else to eat last minute... i brought an extra dinner just in case, which is very unfair to your person, but virgil has suffered too much for me to not be careful.”
“that’s...” logan starts, trying to express what he feels. “that’s just shitty.”
roman smiles and laughs a bit, replying, “yeah, it is, but at least you aren’t, you know, shitty”
and they have this little moment where they smile at each other, and both of them are like wow this man is... good looking but they snap out of it because
dumb gays
everyone in this au is a dumb gay
including yours truly but that is noT important
logan’s like “hey we should get the kids for dinner” and roman obvi agrees
but when they go to get them, they see the kiddos being all adorable and gay and logan turns to roman with this very serious expression like
we must spy on them. this is the cutest shit i’ve ever seen.
so they shuffle over to the edge of the doorway, just out of sight, and logan peeks his head in every now and then for visuals, and he’s repeating what he hears so that roman can understand what’s happening
logan’s in the middle of telling roman something when
dun dun dunnnn
a voice suddenly appears from behind them like
(the voice is virgil)
“what... are you two doing...?”
fucking busted
logan is like
aHa i can lie to these children!
and he says, “we were talking about work--”
but patton just cuts him off with this deadpan look and “you two are horrible liars”
cut to: roman gasping in offense that this emo nightmare of a child just called him a liar when he didn’t even say anything
so he says, “i didn’t even say anything”
patton, being... well, being the asshole that he is, says, “my point still stands”
roman splutters for a while longer, trying to look at virgil and logan for help, but virgil just shrugs and walks with patton to the table, and logan is still very embarrassed about getting caught
it takes a few seconds, but both adults recuperate and move on to what’s important
which is, obviously, dinner
logan walks virgil through what’s available and offers to cook something else if he isn’t feeling particularly happy with anything
virgil damn near cries at how nice logan is
dinner gets served, and they all start eating the (delicious--who would guess that calculator watch knew how to cook something that tasted like it was served in a fancy restaurant) food
after a few minutes of idle chatter and slight pda between the kids, logan offhandedly comments, “you know, i am extremely happy for the both of you that you didn’t cycle through numerous girlfriends before finding out that you’re queer like many of us do.”
and everyone at the table freezes because
logan’s gay????
“hold up,” roman says with a shocked expression. “you’re gay?”
and virgil sighs and shakes his head because “dad, you’re an idiot. he literally has a pride phone case, and there are multiple pictures of him at pride around the house--including one right behind you.”
he also elbows patton when the punk mutters out a very soft “what the fuck”
“i applaud your observational skills--”
“i assume neither of you knew that he was jewish, either”
and now it’s logan’s turn to be surprised because... who the hell is this kid
“you have a dreidel on the mantle that i assumed you forgot to put away after Hanukkah last year.” everyone stared at him. “oh, i’m sorry that i’m not as much of a dumb gay as my father.”
cue roman getting offended again
“excuse you! the role of ‘dumb gay’ is exclusively reserved for thomas f. sanders!”
poor patton hasn’t stopped being confused this whole time, but roman luckily jumps right back into his explanation
“my twin brother, thomas, didn’t realize that he was gay until he had been with a woman for six years and had a child with her. they amicably parted ways because, like him, she was also gay. i am not nearly as stupid as my brother, and i take great offense to virgil calling me a ‘dumb gay!’” he said matter-of-factly
virgil opens his mouth to say something, but roman cuts him off with a swift “if you so much as think about saying what you’re going to say, i will throw you into the ocean without a moment’s hesitation.” roman then very calmly turns to patton and says sweetly, “so, only good child at this table, tell me a bit about yourself so that i know what my devil child is getting himself into.”
unbeknownst to roman, virgil mutters “dumb gay,” under his breath, causing logan to crack a smile across the table
patton shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “my birthday is february nineteenth, my favorite color is blue, and i’m homoromantic asexual.”
roman waited for patton to say more, but the teen averted his gaze back on his food and took another bite
logan decided to pick up the slack after the few seconds of awkward silence “what about you, virgil?”
unlike patton’s less than enthusiastic reply, virgil perked up at the chance to speak
“oh, well, my birthday is june second, and i really like purple! i’m pretty sure that i’m pan, but i have a preference for guys. oooh! and i really want to be an elementary school teacher.”
that made logan perk up. “really? i currently teach first graders across town.”
“no way!” virgil gasped. “that’s awesome! i love little kids so much. they’ve got so much energy.”
“and their intelligence is unrivaled!”
“yes!”
roman and patton watched as the two excitedly conversed about kids and teaching
patton admired virgil’s enthusiasm, and was happy that he was getting along with logan.
and virgil looked really cute with his happy smile and the little glimmer in his eyes
patton may or may not have zoned out in favor of staring at his beautiful boyfriend
roman couldn’t really tell what logan and virgil were talking about (they were speaking far too quickly for him to follow), but he admired how excited logan looked when he was speaking
oh no
roman was falling for logan
time to not follow his own advice and pretend that his feelings don’t exist
after another half hour or so of chatting, the adults and kids split ways for a while
patton and virgil went up to patton’s room, and logan and roman stayed in the living room
the boys settled together at the end of patton’s bed, holding hands and leaning on each other
“you look paw-sitively purrfect, virgil” patton giggled
“is... are you saying that because i have cat-eye eyeliner on?”
“...maybe”
virgil smiled and pulled patton in for a kiss
they kissed for a little, but patton eventually pulled away
he looked worried, and he fidgeted with his hands as he said, “do you think that your dad likes me?”
“well...” virgil started. “he didn’t like you for a long time. after the first day of school, he kind of held a grudge on you.” patton winced, but he didn’t get the opportunity to say anything. “i think he’s forgiven you now.”
“really?”
“i promise. he just wanted to protect me because he’s my dad, but i think he’s realized that you’re not actively trying to hurt me, and you’re just a bit dumb at times”
“hEY”
virgil smiled and nudged patton “you know i love you”
“hnnnnnn i love you too”
“heLL YEAH!”
meaNwhiLE downstairs
logan led roman into the the living room and roman was
stunned
because logan had at least a thousand books meticulously organized around the room
“how many books do you have in here...?” roman asked, running his hand over an entire collection of encyclopedias 
“about one thousand two hundred on the shelves, but i have some children��s books in those baskets at the bottom as well as the books that are starting to fall apart like my copy of hamlet”
“how did you even get so many books? i’ve been collecting novels my whole life, and i only have a few bookshelves full”
“my mom is a librarian, and whenever they would get newer copies of books or get rid of unwanted books, she’d give them to me. i’ve bought a fair few of these myself, but there are only so many that i can buy on a teacher’s salary”
and roman’s like
????? hot
and logan keeps rambling on about books, and roman’s just having a gay crisis but it’s fine 
but then logan looks at roman expectantly, and roman hadn’t exactly been paying enough attention to read logan’s lips, so he played the “can you repeat yourself? i didn’t catch it” card
“sorry. i asked how you came to adopt virgil”
and roman obviously is like hey how about we spill a lot of sad life things with this almost stranger because he’s cute
~this is where the murder is mentioned~
“his mom was my best friend in high school. although we went our separate ways for college, she stayed supportive of me after i came out. she was... the only one from my old life who would even think to talk to me. even thomas hesitated to talk to me for fear of crossing our parents and their ridiculously catholic ideas.” roman sighed. “eventually, though, she got mixed up in some bad stuff, and she got with this drug addict who got her pregnant with virgil. when virgil was about a year old, the guy thought that my friend was cheating on him, and he shot her. the shot, luckily, didn’t kill her right away, and she was able to push him into the corner of a table and kill him before he could get to virgil. she called the police, but she died before they could get there. as soon as i found out, I went and started the adoption process. i had only been a year out of college at that point.”
~end of the murder mention~
logan was stunned. “that is... horrible, roman. i am so sorry for your loss.”
“it’s alright,” roman said with a shrug. “it was over a decade ago, and it led to me getting the best thing in my life. the circumstances were shit, but virgil has made me a better person, and i wouldn’t know what i’d do without him keeping my head on gay.”
“you mean straight...?”
“nothing about me is straight, logan. don’t be absurd”
eventually, it’s time for roman and virgil to leave
virgil and patton walk out to the car and leave the adults at the door because they wanna kiss each other goodbye without being spied on
on their way to the car, virgil whispers “how much do you want to bet that they’ll be flirting with each other by the time we leave”
“ten dollars. i mean, didn’t you see how your dad looked at logan? it was gross!”
meanwhile, at the door...
roman leans back on the doorframe and smiles. “this was a nice night, logan. virgil definitely had a lot of fun”
“that’s great; i’m glad”
“here--give me your phone. i’ll put my number in, and we can get together some other time to get to know each other better”
logan obliged, and roman sent himself a text using logan’s phone and set his contact name as “prince of your dreams”
they chatted for a minute or so longer, just to give the boys enough time to say their goodbyes, before parting ways
logan didn’t spend the rest of the night texting roman
don’t be ridiculous
to be continued
asks are loved and encouraged, and make sure to check out the amazing art people have made on the masterlist! 💖💖💖
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