#my fourth drink in my hand; these desperate prayers of a cursed man

[septembersghost]

i love your review of elvis. i had previously kind of resisted seeing baz's films, just having the impression that they were going to be Too Much for me, but when i heard he was tackling an elvis film, i thought the energies seemed to fit, even though i didn't know much about either man. but if his other films have that same effect of worming under your skin, i need to watch them all. i saw elvis four times in theaters and haven't stopped thinking about it/elvis for a single day since, it's outrageous. i think it makes so much sense to have an outside narrator of elvis' story drive the film. austin shows us the dynamic complexity of elvis through his every movement, but the film and the colonel and the audience are still crying to cage him into that still-life image, inserting distance between us and him. i think the film is always thinking about whether that distance is necessary to actually "love" a person you don't know, but that is the same question that paralyzed elvis with fear. his deep sense of isolation was always fighting against his love for other people and his longing to be on the ground with them, but he sensed that he couldn't let anyone see how much he was struggling lest they pull away. i keep thinking about how the first lyric we hear is "oh, let our love survive," and the film is like ... how much are you going to suffer to keep it going? and who tricked you into thinking you didn't deserve to be loved without giving so much of yourself away? it definitely works as a reflection on hollywood and culture, but it becomes more deeply personal and compassionate toward elvis the more you know about him. <3

chelsea! first of all, i never did take a moment to say how glad i am to see you again and to have you here <333

baz's signature is doing The Most and giving softly dreamy to intensely spliced energy to The Aesthetic, but he somehow manages this in a way that ends up being emotionally affecting and clings to you after viewing. (i think his only film i haven't seen is Australia.) he has a very specific signature and style influenced by his passion for dance/music/fashion, and it's fun seeing how he decides to express that and utilize it as an essential aspect of the storytelling, plus catherine martin makes such beautiful costumes for everything that are illustrative of character and design in such a rich way. i definitely understand why you might have thought his films would be a lot! but since you did enjoy elvis, i wouldn't hesitate to encourage you to give his others a try! moulin rouge remains a particular nostalgic favorite to me (i used to have a moulin rouge poster on my door as a teenager, i still remember my dad buying it for me in the mall. it was one of thee movies for me in high-school. my ex-best friend and i used to blast the soundtrack on repeat, one time during lunch in the classroom we used to hide out in, he jumped on a table to reenact ewan mcgregor singing your song. when i was first very ill, it was a movie i put on a lot. i'm sure this reveals something about me spiritually lol).

something with baz's style that comes through is the incandescent power of music and its deep connection to us. music is always almost like its own character, and he plays with interjecting those anachronistic pieces to give the stories a modernist edge while still staying rooted in their own times, which is very interesting! i loved the strong mix of elvis' own music with the honor to the gospel/r&b/black artists who influenced and inspired him, further mixed with artists he himself inspired and who are creating work now. it made those threads so potent and alive. you're right that the energies match well.

you described this beautifully, i honestly think reading this helped me sort through some of my thoughts and put parts of the film into better context! we have that distance because we're constantly observing, as an audience even when we do feel that sense of love and admiration/appreciation for an artist, there's also a certain complicity because we can never actually know them, and we do inherently want something from them. we can never be undemanding of them as humans, it's that tension where we cherish the art, but we're also by necessity consumers of it. we can't help but be part of the pressure and the noise, even when we try our best to exercise that with empathy for a person. there is an uncrossable distance.

austin shows us the dynamic complexity of elvis through his every movement, but the film and the colonel and the audience are still crying to cage him into that still-life image !!! exactly, and that's what i was referring to a bit in how the idea of an everlasting image haunts me at times, because that can never be a fully realized acknowledgment of anyone. the indelible iconography of it all becomes so much bigger than life that if we want to find the humanistic reality again, it takes some excavation. that's fascinating and heartbreaking to me.

the predatory nature of that framing device gives a lingering sadness to it too, where we are put both into the perspective of our place as audience members, but we also become emotionally connected to the person elvis was and have that reaction of sorrow. i kept wishing desperately that i could protect him from all the things. the ending as well, when it confronts that concept of "love" between an artist and their fans, and how massive that is, how it's intoxicating and enriching, but can also be corrosive. it's difficult and it's moving and it's complicated to navigate.

i think the film is always thinking about whether that distance is necessary to actually "love" a person you don't know, but that is the same question that paralyzed elvis with fear. his deep sense of isolation was always fighting against his love for other people and his longing to be on the ground with them, but he sensed that he couldn't let anyone see how much he was struggling lest they pull away. yes, VERY much so. he tried so hard to conceal that hurt and those struggles because people depended on him, but also because he depended on them too and understandably feared the loss of that love.

the use of suspicious minds as the film's overarching theme was perfect. it totally reframed its meaning and made it speak to both his inner and outer life, to the weight of that fame and love and need.

the film is like ... how much are you going to suffer to keep it going? and who tricked you into thinking you didn't deserve to be loved without giving so much of yourself away? it definitely works as a reflection on hollywood and culture, but it becomes more deeply personal and compassionate toward elvis the more you know about him. absolutely. it's a big question and often sadly a universal one regarding culture and consumption, the expectations put on famous artists to give and give continuously without breaking or showing the cracks (which is impossible and harmful), the demands when such a bright spotlight becomes searing, the strain that comes even from adoration because it's not wholly real. it also subtly questions our fascination with that suffering without exploiting it for visceral shock value. i really appreciate the way the film handled the ending, for example, giving us enough without ever being cruel or relishing in the tragedy for the sake of it. the compassion there is so central.

i knew a bit about him personally, and was familiar with many of his biggest hits, just by virtue of cultural osmosis and the long-held interest i have in older films/music, but the film made me want to do deeper dives into the personal story and the deeper cuts of the music, and i'm loving exploring that, which makes it even more wonderful to be able to share with you! thank you for posting about him and the film because it's what sparked my interest even further to watch it! i've caught up on a lot of movies over the past couple of weeks, but i think elvis had the biggest impact on me, both in thinking about it and the expanse of its themes, and emotionally in feeling both for him and for the magic that exists in the way music keeps living forever. 💗

[illuxtre]

I'm not even halfway through FHH but why is Rosalind SOOOOO Dear Reader coded I'm going to cry

[midnxghtrain]

closed starter: steve for cassie ; @lcvenderhcze​​​

“what can i get ya?” steve asked, finishing up a drink that he was working on, turning toward the person that had just sat down at his bar. he slid the drink over to the person that he had been making it for. “the only thing i can’t do is those fruity blended drinks,” he informed her, chuckling as he scratched the back of his neck. “i’m not the best at making mixed drinks, so if it tastes bad, i swear it’ll be on the house.” he told her, flashing a grin. maybe the bartender shouldn’t have admitted that he wasn’t the best at making drinks, but hey, better be honest so they know what to expect.

[vonlipvig]

the bridge and outro of dear reader are sOOOOOOOOOOO

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

The “I’ve had too much to drink tonight and I know it's sad, but this is what I think about” to “So I wander through these nights, I prefer hiding in plain sight my fourth drink in my hand, these desperate prayers of a cursed man spilling out to you for free” pipeline is… oof.

[stillgotscars]

“i’ve had too much to drink tonight / but i wonder if they’ll miss me once they drive me out” // “my fourth drink in my hand / these desperate prayers of a cursed man”

[youreonyourownkid]

so i wander through these NIGHTS i prefer hiding in plain SIGHT my fourth drink in my hand these deSPERATE PRAYERS of a cursed man spilling out to you for FREE but darling darling PLEASE you wouldn’t take my word for it if you knew who was TALKING if you knew where i was WALKING to a house not a home all alone ‘cause nobody’s THERE where i pace in my pen and my friends found friends who CARE no one sees when you lose when you’re playing SOLITAIRE

[dearreader]

did you guys know that i wander through these nights, i prefer hiding in plain sight. this fourth drink in my hand these desperate prayers of a cursed man! spilling out to you for free, but darling darling please, you would take my word for it if you knew who was talking… if you knew where i was walking… to a house, not a home, all alone cause nobody’s there… where i pace in my own and my friends found friends who care… no one sees you lose when you’re playing solitaire

[taylor-swift-bracket]

Battle of the Bridges!

Dear Reader

So I wander through these nights

I prefer hiding in plain sight

My fourth drink in my hand

These desperate prayers of a cursed man

Spilling out to you for free

But darling, darling, please

You wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking

If you knew where I was walking

To a house, not a home, all alone 'cause nobody's there

Where I pace in my pen and my friends found friends who care

No one sees when you lose when you're playing solitaire

Hits Different

I find the artifacts, cried over a hat

Cursed the space that I needed

I trace the evidence, make it make some sense

Why the wound is still bleedin'

You were the one that I loved

Don't need another metaphor, it's simple enough

A wrinkle in time like the crease by your eyes

This is why they shouldn't kill off the main guy

Dreams of your hair and your stare and sense of belief

In the good in the world, you once believed in me

And I felt you and I held you for a while

Bet I could still melt your world

Argumentative, antithetical dream girl

You’re Losing Me

How long could we be a sad song

'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?

I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy

And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier

Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me

I'm the best thing at this party (You're losin' me)

And I wouldn't marry me either

A pathological people pleaser

Who only wanted you to see her

And I'm fadin', thinkin'

"Do something, babe, say something" (Say something)

"Lose something, babe, risk something" (You're losin' me)

"Choose something, babe, I got nothing" (I got nothing)

"To believe, unless you're choosin' me"

🌁Please reblog!🌁

[justanapparatus]

cruel summer... whether weather be the frost or the violence of the dog days... the dog days are over... she hid around corners and she hid under beds she killed it with kisses and from it she fled... I wander through these nights I prefer hiding in plain sight... with every bubble she sank with a drink and washed it away down the kitchen sink... my fourth drink in my hand these desperate prayers of a cursed man... run fast for your mother run fast for your father run for your children, for your sisters and brothers... the bolter... leave all your love and your longing behind, you can't carry it with you if you want to survive... the bravest thing I ever did was run

[ilostyou]

taylor really said so i wander through these nights i prefer hiding in plain sight my fourth drink in my hand these desperate prayers of a cursed man spilling out to you for free but darling please you wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking and we all just moved on. like

[evermoredeluxe]

so i WANDER through these NIGHTS i prefer HIDING in plain SIGHT my FOURTH drink in my hand these desperate PRAYERS of a CURSED man spilling out to you for FREE but darling darling PLEASE you wouldn’t take my word for it if you knew who was talkinggggg if you knew where i was walkingggg toahousenotahomeallalonecausenobodysthere whereipaceinmypencausemyfriendsfoundfriendswhocare nooneseeswhenyoulosewhenyoureplayingsolitaire you should find another guiding light guiding light but i shine so brighhhht

[chickawah23]

“So I wander through these nights. I prefer hiding in plain sight. My fourth drink in my hand. These desperate prayers of a cursed man.”

➕

“And in plain sight you hid. But you are what you did. And I’ll forget you but I’ll never forgive. The smallest man who ever lived.”

[taylorswifttournament]

Lyrics under the cut

Dear Reader    

So I wander through these nights I prefer hiding in plain sight My fourth drink in my hand These desperate prayers of a cursed man Spilling out to you for free But darling, darling, please You wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking If you knew where I was walking To a house, not a home, all alone 'cause nobody's there Where I pace in my pen and my friends found friends who care No one sees when you lose when you're playing solitaire

right where you left me    

Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it She's still twenty-three inside her fantasy How it was supposed to be Did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion? Breakups happen every day, you don't have to lose it She's still twenty-three inside her fantasy And you're sitting in front of me

[fruitydiaz]

you should find another guiding light

dear reader — taylor swift

[Image description: 8 gifs of Bobby Nash from 9-1-1 with lyrics to Dear Reader by Taylor Swift. Gif 1: Two gifs fading in one after the other. In the first gif, Bobby stands over Jonah and swings his arm back to punch him. In the second gif, Bobby holds a glass in his hand before shattering it. The text reads, "dear reader, when you aim at the devil make sure you don't miss." Gif 2: Bobby stands facing out towards the ocean, his hair and uniform soaking wet. The text reads, "so I wander through these nights." Gif 3: A black and white gif of Bobby as he stands at a podium, addressing his AA group. The text reads, "I prefer hiding in plain sight." Gif 4: Two gifs fading in one after the other. In the first gif, Bobby sits on the ground of an empty apartment, pouring himself another drink. In the second gif, two firefighters drag Bobby back out of the apartment complex that's caught on fire as he screams for his family. The text reads, "My fourth drink in my hand, these desperate prayers of a cursed man, spilling out to you for free." Gif 5: Four gifs fading in one after the other; first Chimney, then Hen, Eddie, and Buck. In each gif, they look to Bobby for advice and comfort, eyes wide and teary. The text reads, "but darling, darling, please." Gif 6: Bobby shakes his head and argues when Eddie tries to comfort him. The text reads, "you wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking." Gif 7: A black and white gif of Bobby standing alone at the stove, cooking himself dinner. The text reads, "if you knew where I was walking." Gif 8: A side profile shot of Bobby sitting alone at his table, taking a sip of his drink. The text reads, "to a house, not a home, all alone 'cause nobody's there." /end ID.]

[dearreader]

꯱ׁׅ֒ᨵׁׅ ꪱׁׅ ᨰׁׅɑׁׅ֮ꪀׁׅժׁׅ݊ꫀׁׅܻr tׁׅhׁׅ֮rᨵׁׅυׁׅᧁׁhׁׅ֮ tׁׅhׁׅ֮ꫀׁׅܻ꯱ׁׅ֒ꫀׁׅܻ ꪀׁׅꪱׁׅᧁׁhׁׅ֮tׁׅ꯱ׁׅ֒

ɪ ᴘʀᴇꜰᴇʀ ʜɪᴅɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴘʟᴀɪɴ ʇɥɓıs

THIS FOURTH DRINK IN MY HAND THESE DESPERATE

PRAYERS

OF A CURSED MAN!

ｓｐｉｌｌｉｎｇ ｏｕｔｔｏ ｙｏｕ ｆｏｒ ｆｒｅｅ

but darlingdarling please.

you wouldn't take my word if you knew who was taaaalking

…

If you knew where was waaaaaalkin’

…

To a house, notahome, all alone 'cause nobody's there

…

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘐 𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦

…

No one sees when you lose when you're playing solitaire

…

y⃞  o⃞   u⃞    s⃞   h⃞   o⃞   u⃞   l⃞   d⃞    f⃞   i⃞   n⃞   d⃞    a⃞   n⃞   o⃞   t⃞   h⃞   e⃞   r⃞    g⃞   u⃞   i⃞   d⃞   i⃞   n⃞   g⃞    l⃞   i⃞   g⃞   h⃞   t⃞   ,⃞    

g⃞   u⃞   i⃞   d⃞   i⃞   n⃞   g⃞    l⃞   i⃞   g⃞   h⃞   t⃞   ,⃞    b⃞   u⃞   t⃞    i⃞    s⃞   h⃞   i⃞   n⃞   e⃞    s⃞   o⃞

ʇɥɓıɹq