#my man is bad at communicating but I’m gon stick beside him🫡

[willyoubemycherryy]

𝙼𝚛. & 𝙼𝚛𝚜. 𝙴𝚐𝚊𝚗_ _ _𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚌𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗?_𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐..___. . . .

S͟E͟T͟ A͟N͟Y͟T͟I͟M͟E͟ B͟E͟F͟O͟R͟E͟ E͟P͟I͟S͟O͟D͟E͟ 5

𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝚊𝚛𝚐𝚞𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚌𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚌𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚝, 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚞𝚙 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚞𝚝, 𝚘𝚍𝚍𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚙𝚝𝚜𝚍, 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝙰𝚁𝙴 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑, 𝚠𝚊𝚛 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚊 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝙹𝚘𝚑𝚗 𝚋𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚗𝚐

@missusnora @eleanorbaybars

_ - _ - _- __-_ __—_

“just give me a reason, just a little bit’s enough. just a second; we’re not broken just bent and we can learn to love again…”

You never thought you’d see yourselves like this.

“NO! NO MORE DODGING THIS! WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?!”

It should have never come to this.

“I’M RIGHT HERE IF YOU WOULD JUST LOOK AT ME! DAMNNIT WOMAN!”

But…it had to happen. The tension so tight, it finally snapped.

“You’re not because I AM looking at you, and I can see that you’re here but you aren’t here with me! You haven’t been for weeks!”

It was a normal day. He had a rare day off and you two were together so everything was supposed to be perfect. Only…it wasn’t. For weeks, everytime you spoke, everytime you were able to be together, even when you would glimpse him; he’d be so close but so far.

You knew he was hurting.

Over the lost boys, over Curt, over the despondence that the higher ups seemed to have with him, over his own internal griefs, struggles, and hopes. But with all his hurt…came a distance.

Acting like everything was okay. He’d be there in the moment but he didn’t live in it like he used to. He didn’t talk about it so you wouldn’t bring it up. Most times, he was so far it felt like it wasn’t even listening to you.

Now, there’s a gap where your bond was. And it keeps getting bigger and bigger with everything you don’t say to each other.

Today was the last straw.

Talking to him and seeing that distance in his eyes while he stayed silent…

“Do you even still love me?!”

Hot tears run down your face as you stand in the living room barefoot. Looking up at him, your greatest love and hardest pain.

At first it was just anger, throwing the heels on your feet at him in the beginning, the screaming, frustration. But at this point? You were just tired and hurt of having to miss someone who’s right there.

“…What?” The question comes out hushed. John looking down at you in crestfallen disbelief, glassy blue eyes and furrowed brows.

You don’t think he loves you anymore?

“You think I don’t love you? Doll,” panic and desperation seep into him and it shows. Looking and sounding so pained that you can’t bear to look at him anymore. Teardrops stream from your face and hit the floor as you drop your head.

“You’re with me. I have you. But why do I still feel alone if I have you?” Your voice is shaking so bad but this needs to come out.

“It’s like I lost you to the war already with how hollow you’ve become. You won’t let me in. When I talk, it’s like you can’t hear me. You won’t let me comfort you. You won’t even reach out to Gale. Just retreating back into your thoughts that can’t possibly care for you the way I do…it’s like my John left and I’m stuck with his ghost.” The wave of held back emotions drown you and you wail, unbidden sobs wracking your body before John gently takes your face into his big, warm hands.

The familiarity of his touch makes your heart ache. You don’t even notice immediately that he was crying too. His silent tears cutting you to pieces.

John cries because it’s true. He has been in a weird place lately and he can’t seem to find his way out. He’s not good at not being the leader so he doesn’t know how to let others step in to help him when he needs it. So, he drowns himself in his thoughts, doubts, and regrets. Lets the distance he’s created hurt him some more. Because, he’s used to hurt. Until…it starts to hurt more than usual.

Until it ends up hurting you.

Nothing is allowed to hurt you. You’re one of the reasons he serves.

Bucky has seen so many things that can hurt you. He should have never let one of them be him.

“I’m so sorry bunny”. Bucky can’t take you crying. Your little hiccuping sobs are killing him. Closeness. Closeness, is what you both need right now. So, he doesn’t even bother with formalities before lifting you up into him. Wrapping your legs around his waist and tucking your head into his neck. He rests his cheek against the top of your head, wraps his big arm around you as he holds you, cries with you, and apologizes.

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I’m an ass. You’re right. I haven’t been here and none of that is your fault. But it is my fault for letting you feel this way. For making you feel like I don’t love you, when I do. I love you more than sleeping in, I love you more than winning, I love you more than every life I lived before.” The soft, low timbre of his voice makes you warm, like a soothing balm listening to him finally come back to you.

“You’re not alone because you do have me and I’m not alone because I have you. If I’m not anywhere else, the one place I’ll always be is in your heart. I’ll try harder to open up so we can be even closer. Nothing could ever compare to come close to your affection so don’t ever stop trying to reach me, okay? Even when the line is connected, stay on it, okay?” This is the most he’s bared himself to you and you bury yourself into him more.

“…okay..I love you too, Bucky.” Barely a whisper but he hears you. Pressing kisses all over the top of your head until you lift it to look into his eyes.

Time seems slower as you gravitate towards each other, eyes slipping closed when your lips meet in a tender kiss.

You missed him so much.

It’s perfect. The way your lips fit together, pushing before colliding back to one another. Breathing in the softness of your mouth, Bucky deepens the kiss. Holding the back of your head, you completely melt into him as light, wet sounds accompanied by picked up breaths; fill you and the atmosphere with pure warmth.

Bucky struggles to pull away first because he knows how he’ll get. He’s aching to make you feel better in any way he can but now really is not the time to let comfort to give way to passion.

“I missed you, bunny”. He presses his forehead to yours but the lovely way he speaks to you makes you blush. Suddenly feeling. . . shy.

“I missed you too”, voice as soft as you feel. Bucky readjusts you in his arms before heading towards the stairs.

��Well, let’s fix that. So we won’t have to miss each other when we’re together”.

“John Clarence Egan- !”

If he thinks he’s gonna cuddle and sweet talk his way into your panties after that fight, he’s dead right. (not standing on business at ALL)

“I meant; we could talk, bunny. Y’know, really catch up. Just want you with me, on everything this time.”

Oh.

Okay.

He means you two can bond.

The thought of that kind of intimacy in conversation; and with him, makes you love giddy as you practically purr in agreement, nodding your head.

Kissing the top of your head, Bucky carries you up to your shared bedroom. Happy that you two are going to be okay and that you’re staying with him; because with you is where his heart belongs.

Safe, with you.