#no beta we die like jaakko

[entropicquilibriumofchaos]

Fourth Annual Cauldron Lake Ice Hockey Tournament

In the thrilling conclusion to the Fourth Annual Cauldron Lake Ice Hockey Tournament, (sponsored by Coffee World and the Bright Falls Council for Outdoor Recreation), the Oh Deer Diner Deer, led by team captain Rose "the Brute" Marigold, face the reigning champions, the Kalevala Knights, led by team captain Ilmo "the Grinder" Koskela. Which team will rise to the occasion and which will sink beneath the black water of Cauldron Lake?

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“Alright team!” Ilmo shouted over the rumble of idle chatter. 

All of the heads turned to him as he stood in the doorway of the heating tent. His stance commanded attention; legs spread to keep his balance on the skates on his feet and his arm out to the side, holding an old hockey stick that looked like it had seen better days. He had a look of steely confidence that seemed at home on his features. 

“Last game of the night, last game of the tournament,” he started, walking into the tent to conserve heat. “It's us versus the Oh Deer Diner Deer once again.”

A quiet murmur filled the tent as the team made their comments about their rivals. Ilmo put a hand up, silencing them effectively.

“You may have heard that Bright Falls has a goalie that has been dominating this year. The rumors are true, the new Sheriff, Tim Breaker, is helping out the Deer this year. And yes, he played semi-professional hockey. But, he’s got nothing on Jaakko.”

A few cheers sounded and Jaakko was shoved from side to side in his goalie gear. A small smile appeared on his face as he pushed his teammates back playfully.

“Okay starting line up time:” Ilmo announced, and all the heads popped up. “Jones, ya ready?”

A middle-aged man with grizzled features nodded sharply.

“Good, ‘cause you’re going!” Ilmo shouted, and the team gave a grunt. “Charlie, ya ready?”

Among the older denizens of Watery, a teenaged boy popped his head up. The black and yellow hockey gear he sported seemed to almost drowned him. Nonetheless he raised a fist, “Down with the Deer!”

The team cheered in agreement.

“Good, ‘cause you’re going!” Ilmo repeated. “WIlliams, ya ready?”

Another player grunted, leading the team in cheers. 

“Good, ‘cause you’re going!” he said, before locking eyes with his brother. The two of them stared each other down with fire in their eyes before Ilmo spoke up. “Jaakko, ya ready?”

“You know it, brother,” he replied, “Let’s kick some Bright Falls ass, boys.”

Ilmo belted out one last “Good, ‘cause you’re going!” and the tent erupted into shouts as the team stood up and donned the rest of their gear. 

Meeting in the middle of the tent, over the propane heater, all of the team members put their hands in a circle. 

“Knights on three,” Ilmo instructed, “Yksi, kaksi, kolme:”

The team shouted, “Knights!” in unison before filing out of the tent.

Ilmo made his way to the back of the tent to his brother, who was buckling his mask to his helmet. Jaakko smiled at his brother and grabbed the back of his head and brought their helmets together with an audible clash.

“Go get ‘em, veli.” Jaakko encouraged, making Ilmo smile widely.

The brothers tottered on their skates out of the heated tent and onto the ice of Cauldron Lake. A good-sized rink had been cleared of snow and benches had been hauled out for spectators to watch. Under a tent on the opposite side of the rink, a table with chairs behind and on either side served as the penalty boxes and score-keeper’s table. Behind the table, in a heavy fur lined coat was Ahti, nursing a coffee and leaning against a shovel. Next to him was Rose Marigold, teetering back and forth on her skates. Her team was warming up on the ice as the Knights joined on the opposite side.

Jaakko broke from Ilmo and joined the rest of the team and the captain skated over to the tent. He came to an abrupt stop in front of Rose, sending a flurry of snow at her calves. She just rolled her eyes. 

Ahti just chuckled and shook his head. “Pluck your chickens elsewhere, lapset. Wouldn’t want a repeat of last year, ei?”

Last year’s tournament flashed vividly in Ilmo’s mind. His back still hurt from where Rose had body checked him hard enough to send him into the snowbank. But getting her back with a slapshot between her skates had been payback enough. However, the two didn’t speak for a month afterwards.

“The Deer are committed to sportsmanlike conduct this year, Ahti. No trouble from us.” Rose boasted, leaning against her hockey stick. 

Ilmo rolled his eyes. “Knights are known for their chivalry, you know.”

Rose scowled. “Oh shove your chivalry up your ass, Koskela,” she mocked.

Ahti laughed heartily, throwing his head back. “Ah, ten for the attempt.”

The two players shoved off of the ice towards their respective teams. It was sure to be a close game.

[entropicquilibriumofchaos]

i'll be home for christmas

Ilmo Koskela & Jaakko Koskela

A little Christmas-themed Koskela Brothers blurb to ward off the Sunday scaries AND the Holiday heebie-jeebies. Takes place between the events of Alan Wake and Alan Wake 2

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The darkness was closing in around him as Ilmo ran as fast as his legs could take him. The boxes jostled in his arms and he could feel the sweat gathering on his brow despite the frigid temperatures. His boots pounded against the snow-covered path in a steady rhythm. His mind did not wander; getting to the cabin was the only thing that mattered. The fate of the night rested on his shoulders.

A single, yellow light shone in the distance. Ilmo fought against the cold wind to push on towards the warm light. The shadows crept closer, seeming to suffocate him the closer he got to the luminated cabin. With strained breathing, he barrelled towards the door. He was met with blinding light, warmth, and the smell of mulled wine.

“Hyvää joulua!” Ilmo shouted, dropping the brightly wrapped gifts on the floor and throwing his arms in the air. Two blurs of red and green raced towards him like bullets and he was quick to scoop them up in his arms.

“Merry Christmas, Uncle Ilmo!” the two children shouted, almost in unison. 

Another face peaked into the entry way at the greeting. Jaakko sighed, a mixing bowl on his hip. “Hyvää joulua, Ilmo. Glad to see you could make it.”

Ilmo turned his attention from the two children that clung to him to his brother. He was wearing the ridiculous “Kiss the Chef” apron that Ilmo had gotten him the prior year. The sight made him guffaw, filling the cabin with laughter. He put the kids down gently before loading their arms with the presents he had brought and directing them towards the sitting room. He turned back to Jaako with the same stupid grin on his face.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world, dear brother,” he said, ruffling Jaakko’s hair and pushing past him into the kitchen. 

The small cooking space was filled with smells that made Ilmo’s mouth water. There was ham in the oven, glӧgi on the stove, and a steaming plate of lipeäkala on the counter. A basket full of dinner rolls was already set on the dining table, which was set with the “good china” (ie: not paper plates and plastic forks and knives, but actual plates and silverware). 

Jaakko followed his brother into the kitchen, folding butter into a bowl of mashed potatoes as he watched Ilmo dip his pinky finger into the glӧgi to taste it. It was a quick dip, as the mulled wine was still simmering and therefore still extremely hot. Ilmo immediately put his finger in his mouth to soothe the burn and Jaakko just rolled his eyes.

“It’s good,” Ilmo said around his finger. 

Jaakko set the potatoes on the table and went into the cupboard. He took out two clear glass cups, and filled them both with glӧgi before giving one to Ilmo. 

“Kippis!” they cheered before sipping on the wine. 

The oven dinged and Jaakko ushered his brother out of the way with oven mitts. As he pulled the baking tray out, he threw a glance over his shoulder to the sitting room, where Charlie and Charlene were busy separating their presents into piles. 

“Those were the gifts from the post office, right?” he asked in a hushed voice.

Ilmo just stared at him wide-eyed. A moment of silence passed as Jaakko set the ham down on the counter and turned to his brother. He was about to start going off on him when Ilmo smiled innocently.

“Those were the gifts from Santa . I don’t know what this post office you talk about is,” he shrugged as he sat down at one end of the table and crossed one leg over the other. 

Between the two brothers, the table was set quickly. Charlie and Charlene were corralled into the kitchen, where they sat opposite of each other, mirroring their father and uncle. 

“Now,” Ilmo started, “Have you two been good this year?” 

Charlie immediately piped up. “We��ve been sooooooo good, Uncle Ilmo.” 

Charlene nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, so good.”

Ilmo gave Jaakko a skeptical look, “What do you think, Jaakko?”

The two children turned almost instantaneously as their father seemed to contemplate their behavior over the past year. Within a moment’s passing, Jaakko came to a conclusion.

“You know, Ilmo, I think they have been good this year.” 

A look of relief washed over the children’s faces.

Ilmo raised his glass and the others followed (the children with their glasses of milk and the brothers with their glӧgi). 

“I think that there will be blessings for all of the Koskelas this Christmas,” Ilmo preached, “Kippis!”

A chorus of “Kippis!” rang around the table as the family drank and dished up their Christmas meal together. Conversation flowed as they ate leisurely. The kids were eager to tell their uncle about the snow fort they had made outside and Ilmo regaled them with stories from his and his brother’s youth. They ate until they were stuffed, and then more as Jaakko pulled out gingerbread cookies from the warmer. 

Glӧgi was exchanged for coffee as they moved into the sitting room. The kids ripped into their presents as the brothers watched on with smiles on their faces. 

“Oh, I almost forgot your gift,” Ilmo said quietly to Jaakko as the kids threw wrapping paper at each other. He pulled out a small box wrapped in red and green paper and handed it to his brother. 

Jaakko looked curiously at the box before methodically unwrapping it. He opened the small cardboard to find a tangle of cordage. The box was discarded as he untangled the bundle to reveal a necklace made of cordage with a wooden pendant attached. The pendant was hand carved into two overlapping triangles. 

Ilmo smiled shyly as he pulled a matching necklace out from under his shirt. “I thought we could match. You know, just a little reminder of why we’re doing all of this,” he rambled. They looked at the kids, oblivious to what was going on with the adults as they pelted each other with wrapping paper. Ilmo was startled by his brother pulling him in for a hug. 

The two separated and leaned back into the couch as Jaakko put on his necklace and tucked it under his t-shirt. 

“Thank you, Ilmo. For everything this year,” he said. “I don’t know what we’d do without you.”

Ilmo shook his head and put a hand on his shoulder. “It goes both ways, brother. It goes both ways .”

“You started a fire in the sauna before dinner, right?”

"Perkele."