#no work just sittin around in lingerie

[shypupi]

I should rly be allowed to just sit around n be your horny lil doll

[mrsmaxwelllord]

Parking lot Fever

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader

Summary: you know that there's something wrong when Javi comes to see you on your break, hours before the end of your shift.

Warnings: PwP, making out, sex car, public sex(kinda of), Season3 Javi.

A/N: basically, baby boy is mad at a meeting that went wrong and looks for a stress relief. this is self-indulgen, you guys, im h*rny.

 Javier knew your work hours didn’t end this early, yet here you are. Once again sitting on his lap in some godforsaken parking lot, his Jeep parked away from other cars.

 You had cursed him for making you walk all the way to his car, but in the end you would do it again. It wasn’t completely odd to see him on the bakery you worked for, he likes the coffee and even the pastries, but generally he’d wait til its closure to show up and give you a ride home. It shouldn’t surprise you that he had come all the way from the Embassy just to make out, but it did - you just didn’t have it in you to complain about it.

 Because Javier is kissing your neck and it is just heavenly. It’s as urgent and hungry as the first kiss he gave you and this makes you forgive him for what happened earlier, but you also feel unsure. Why is he so impatient? Although, when he bites and kiss all the way down to your breasts you can’t help but moan and forget the inquiry.

 You bring your hands to his hair and shoulder for leverage, it doesn’t work. He’s squeezing the fat of your hips and pushing up, his hard-on pressing deliciously on your cunt - the fact there’s nothing but an underwear separating you from his jeans doesn’t help, his warm makes you wet and eager. You rock on him just right and he groans back at you.

 “Javi, I’m on my break” you tried to reason, biting your lip to hold a moan. “We can’t do it here.”

 “You never complained before, I thought you liked it.”

 Your breath catch when he starts to unbutton your dress, you arch your back so he has a good review of your breasts - his eyes shine when he see his favourite lingerie. “Not right now, I have just half an hour.”

 “I don’t see you trying to stop me” he answer with a smirk, you laugh with him. His kisses stop when you use your grip on his hair to make him look at you. You know how much he likes when you play with his curls so the little whimper doesn't surprises you, you smile bigger. You give him a peck on his pretty nose and on each of his cheeks.

 You caress his hair for a little longer, burning under his attentive gaze on you. Javier have always been intense in everything he did, but this is a different kind of burn. This is slow and fierce and you love this - him and how you treat you - so much that you can only give in.

 You take a deep breath. Oh, what the hell!

  “We’ll have to be quick” you purr on his lips, then give his nose another peck. 

 You starts by rocking on him slow and steadily, kissing him soft to tease. Your hand in his hair scratches his scalp just like he adores and you try to deep the kiss, but Javier is having none of it. He tightens his hold on your hips and oblige you to work hard on him. Thrusting up whenever he can and grunting, not giving a damn about how loud you're whimpering his name - if anything it makes him grow impatient and go faster.

 “Will you be a good girl for me?” he asks, stopping the kiss to look you in the eyes. “I really need you.”

Javier always knows exactly what to say to make you melt with his wishes, so you nod weakly. "Yes, I will try."

He squeeze your asscheek hard, bringinig you even closer to him. You can only wail out loud.

 “So good to me baby”

 Apart from a man driving towards the exit, there's no one around the car to hear you, but you still a bit paranoid, so you try to keep your noise low. You take a good look out the car window before turning your attention back to the man who is kissing you.

 The kiss is hungry, like he hasn’t seen you in a long time, but it’s different from the kiss he usually gives you when he comes back from a long trip. This is intense and demanding and he takes everything you have to give and asks for more.

 It’s a work of a starving man. So you kiss him with the same intensity, holding his face between your hands and giving in to his desires. He obviously want to forget something and you want to help him, if he isn't open to a conversation (he never talks about work with you) you'd help him how you can. In this case is in form of your pussy spread and wet just for him. 

 You let go of the thought of someone catching you two having sex in the middle of the afternoon and allow yourself to enjoy the moment, enjoy Javier touches and little groans. You want it to last forever. 

 Your elbow accidentally presses the horn when you try to unbutton your bra, startling you both.

 He looks at you with big eyes. 

 "Careful, chica" he warns, before helping you out of the undergarment.

 You laugh it off and throw your lacy bra on the passenger seat, showing your breasts to Javi. A sly smile on your face.

 He lavish each one with open mouth kisses and, damn, this man know what he do. In no time you're moaning his name and throwing your head back in pleasure. He bring a hand up to play with your breast - giving you a playful squeeze.

 Your underwear is soaking wet with your juices and your moving gets sloppier, you can't concentrate on anything but Javier lips or his jeans bottom that is pressing in your clit just perfectly. It gets harder and harder to be quiet; occasionally whimpering a bit too loud, but he's not doing anything to stop you so you guess there's no warn in it.

 Javier don’t let go of you, squeezing every bit of flesh he can get a hold of and bitting marks in you. He moans when you roll your hips and press down on him hard.

 You try to touch your clit to end your agony, but Javi slap you hand away - giving you no explanation whatsoever. You bite his neck in retaliation.

 He sneaks his hand to your underwear and finally touch your wet pussy. The sinful noise of you and your moaning echoes shameless in the car. You're so close.

 "Good girl, all ready for me. Always eager!" You can hear the desperation in his voice. When you face him, his eyes are shining with excitement.

You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him clumsily.

 But when you finally bring your hand to his crotch to relieve him from his suffering a knock on the window startle both of you for the second time. To your shame, you end up cumming that exact moment. You stifle a groan, trying to hide the noise but the stranger obviously knows what's going on..

 You gasp and try to hide your modesty but Javier is quicker and uses his grey suit to cover you.

Javier talks to the man, trying not to prolong the moment, and all you can do is cover your face with your hands and hide on Javi's shoulder. Meanwhile, his hands hold you all the time, not leaving any inch of skin bare.

  The man just want you guys to stop messing around and is happy to let you go without any other words. Only when you are far enough away do you leave Javi's lap and you allow yourself to breath it out.

 Your boyfriend (can you call him that? besides the few times you worked out some steam together, you never talked about relationship) isn’t so happy by your side, his hard on still alive and angry.

"I'm so sorry" Javi apologizes, looking him in your eye at a red light. "This shouldn't have happened. No one should have seen you..."

 “It’s okay, Javi. It's not your fault” you reassure him, but he doesn't really seem to hear you, turning his attention back to the road. When you realise to where he’s driving to, you stop him.

 “There’s a dead-end street behind the bakery, let me there.” 

 ...

 When he parks the car closer to the backside door of the building, you surprise him by freeing his cock and sittin on his lap again.

 "What are you doing?" he asks.  The wheel behind you hurts your back and you try to get comfortable.

  "I'm already late anyway. Five minutes more won't make then any happier" you answer him; holding his face and kissing him.

[kumkaniudaku]

Savage

A/N: Happy Two Year Anniversary to this blog. I hope you enjoy. 

Summary: CoCo’s trying to get back to herself with a special photoshoot and help from an unlikely source. 

Standing in the bathroom mirror dressed in nothing but the skin God blessed her with, Tasha proudly turned her hips from side to side to examine her body. A small smile crept across her golden features as her eyes raked over her hips before landing on her backside. She used the tips of her fingers to grasp at the cuff of her ass and lift the area.

"Hey there, girl. Been a long time since we've seen each other. Lookin' good." Tasha's hands took the scenic route to her breast, stopping at her stomach and rubbing her palm over the section that had plagued her for years. When she reached her chest, she playfully pushed her breasts together and smiled. "And look at you guys. Sittin' all pretty after all these years."

With her hair loose and untamed and Beyonce's self-titled album playing in the background, CoCo felt a surge of energy that began a swirling motion in her hips. She watched the natural curves and jiggle of her body as she moved and smiled, finally feeling comfortable with the "new" her. A year and half postpartum was filled with the ups and downs of understanding the changes within her and accepting them. Tasha's silly dance moves were a moment of celebration that her husband, who quietly stood in the doorway to enjoy the morning entertainment, understood and appreciated.

In the middle of twirl to the rap portion of Yonce, Tasha was startled by her husband. She quickly rushed to her phone to pause the song and end her private dance party.

"No, don't stop," Chadwick laughed as he stepped into the bathroom. "I'm lovin' the show."

"I feel like you're laughing at me."

"Of course not, baby. I'm laughing with you." His last words became a sultry mumble as he made space for his lips on Tasha's. Goosebumps pebbled on her cold skin wherever Chadwick's warm palms landed, finally finding a home just above her ass. They stood in one position, holding each other and making silly conversations that kept the energy light. In the middle of a debate on which child would be the first to wake and terrorize the house, Tasha decided to share a bit of news.

"I got an email this morning from Rihanna," she casually introduced, keeping her eyes away from Chadwick's as she pretended to take an interest in the chain around his neck.

"Is this for another one of those wild girl's nights that ends up on Instagram?"

"Wow, I accidentally showed a little nipple once on IG Live once, and now it's a whole thing!" Chadwick cocked his head back with his eyebrows raised and a soft smile resting on his face.

Instead of bringing up the instantaneous internet reaction that lasted for days after the unintentional peep show, he laughed at the memory and shook his head.

"Anyway," she emphasized with an eye roll. "It was an invitation to do a little modeling very soon."

"Modeling for Rihanna, huh? Is this the Fenty makeup stuff you look so good in?"

"No, but I'll make sure to bring your compliment up the next time I speak to her," Tasha laughed before going silent.

Her sudden reluctance to continue didn't escape Chadwick as he playfully pinched her backside to get a response.

"Don't leave me hanging, girl, what is it?"

"Ow! Okay! Rihanna wants to see me in some of her new...lingerie."

"I'm sorry what was that," Chadwick asked after noticing his wife's intentional rush past the last word.

"I said Rihanna wants me to model some of her new lingerie."

"Lingerie. Like half-naked, ass out in see-through lace lingerie?"

"Possibly. She says, and I quote, that I have a nice ass that deserves to be seen all over the world. She gave me the entire rundown of the campaign and the process. Baby, I really wanna do this. I'm finally feeling back to being myself after having Noah, and I want to celebrate! I'm not going to have this body forever. I should show it off while I still have time, right?"

Chadwick could hear and see the excitement radiating from Tasha at the thought of working on the campaign, but he worried about her. From the beginning of their relationship, he'd vowed to protect her from the often cruel opinions of the public. While he trusted CoCo's ability to take the comments in stride, he wasn't sure if he would be able to refrain from unleashing his wrath upon some unsuspecting teenager behind a keyboard.

Dropping his head, Chadwick placed a chaste kiss on Tasha's nose. "If you think you can handle it, I'm all for you showing off your little cupcakes within reason."

"Oh, yeah, right. You love these little cupcakes."

"Mm, I do. 'Specially when you have 'em all oiled up for me. Ooh, or in that backless satin dress you wear on special occasions."

Tasha rolled her eyes and smiled as he ran through all of the ways he liked to see her derriere present for his viewing pleasure.

"Do you wanna hear about the overall concept of the shoot or not, lover boy," she laughed while Chadwick nipped at her neck and pressed her body closer to his.

"Go ahead; I'm listening. I can listen and rub at the same time."

"Well, what if I wanted to be rubbed separately?"

CoCo could barely hear her husband's response over her squeals as Chadwick lifted her from her feet to place her on the counter. They quickly abandoned playful tickling for more sensual forms of touching until they were too wrapped up in each other to notice other sounds in their home.

Their escalating round of flirting came to a sudden halt when the repeated clicking of the bedroom's doorknob caught their attention.

"It's time for breakfast," Micah yelled from the hallway. "You guys said playtime was at night! I'm hungry."

"What are we eating this morning, baby girl?"

"I dunno! I'm not a grown-up yet. Can Mommy wake up and make us pancakes? MOMMY WAKE UP!"

Tears pricked CoCo's eyes as she fought to stifle laughter and catch her breath. "I'm awake, Chicken Little. Pancakes coming right up. Go check on your brother."

Micah answered with an unenthusiastic grumble before dragging her feet down the hallway in the direction of Noah's bedroom. One look at each other sent Chad and CoCo into a fit of laughter at the sheer comedy of the moment.

"That's our girl," Tasha laughed.

"She's a little diva. I wonder who she gets that from."

"Oop! Is that sarcasm I hear, husband?"

"Oh, never!" Sneaking a final kiss, Chadwick stepped back to make his way toward the threshold of the bathroom. A mischievous smirk graced his face as he turned to address his wife. "She absolutely gets it from you."

---------------------

"Hit a switch on a fake nigga, like a station. Sex with me so amazing…"

Tasha silently mouthed the words to Rihanna's ANTI album while her house buzzed with staff members assisting with the early morning shoot. Though her exterior was calm and collected on the outside, she was suffering through an awful surge of anxiety.

When she initially accepted Rihanna's invitation, CoCo didn't even consider the specifics. She'd been a part of plenty of photoshoots, but all of them had he styled in clothing that didn't show off very intimate curves and lumps. Never had she been tasked with fighting to cover her nooks and crannies with her olive-colored Savage x Fenty robe.

"You think I can fit this?"

Snapping from her onslaught of negative thoughts, Tasha shifted her eyes to get a glimpse of her sister through her vanity mirror.

"Yeah...in about four months."

"I don't have four months. I wanna have sex tonight. I'm hormonal, and I want it immediately."

"Then, by all means, cram those big lactating titties in that bra."

Tiana laughed from the pit of her growing belly for several seconds until she paused. "I think I just peed a little."

This time Tasha joined in, motioning for the makeup artist to pass her a few tissues to catch the tears welling in the corner of her eyes.

"Sit your ass down, TiTi. The only person allowed to pee on the carpet by accident is still learning how to stand on his own two feet."

"I just love my little chunk muffin," she gushed, referring to her nickname for Noah. "When are they coming back?"

"Hopefully, long after all of this is over. I don't know if I'm ready for Micah to see me dressed so...so scandalous."

Taking a seat on the chaise across the room, Tiana shook her head in disapproval. "Oh girl, hush. You're a woman with a beautiful body, and Micah could stand to learn an early lesson about the power of living in your skin unapologetically. A healthy body image at a young age is important."

"When did you become a damn poet," Tasha asked in faux annoyance. She knew her younger sister was right in her advice and needed a moment to process the statement.

"I became a poet when you invited me over here for moral support. It's my new thing after reading all these rich lady parenting books."

"Who knew my little sister had morals?" The pair locked eyes through the mirror and smiled at each other when Tiana flashed her middle finger and waved Tasha off. "Really, though, thanks, Ti. I appreciate the advice."

"Yeah, yeah. Show your appreciation by directing me to the best snacks in your pantry."

The hairstylist took a break from situating CoCo's pin curls to finally release his laughter, making the Greene sister duo join in.

"You two need a YouTube channel. I would subscribe," he complimented as his laughter subsided. "Feel free to grab some food from the catering station on the deck. Or we can get someone to bring it to you. What's the order?"

"Oooh, fancy! Don't worry about that, sweetheart. I need to get some exercise done anyway. Gotta keep my girlish figure for my Savage shoot one day."

Tiana gave the room a show as she playfully ran her hands up her legs and twisted her hips in a sultry dance. Once she exited the room in search of lunch, silence filled the room once again.

Megan Thee Stallion became the soundtrack of Tasha's thoughts as she pondered Tiana's advice. Maybe it wasn't Micah that needed the body positivity message. Though she didn't necessarily hate her body, she was used to living in her shell in public, and only embracing her natural self in private. It was time for a change.

"Knock, knock." A set of knuckles rapped against the hardwood door of CoCo's vanity area inside of her closet, making her pause to catch her breath. Such a melodic blend of West Indian charm and homegirl inflections could only belong to one person.

"Rihanna?!? In my house?!? Am I dead?"

The Bajan Beauty chuckled as she moved further into the room to check on the progress of Tasha's glam prep. "If you're dead, then I'm gonna need all this shit back."

"Wow, so you wouldn't let me represent the Fenty brand for Jesus?"

"Who said you were going to see Jesus?" Everyone in the room fell into a fit of laughter as Rihanna wrapped her arms around CoCo in a warm embrace. "You look so good right now! Like...damn!"

"Do I? Because I feel like an old lady trying to be young again."

"Oh, please! Stand up." Tasha immediately began to protest, but her words fell on ears that would not take 'no' for an answer. Before she could make a mad dash for the bathroom, Rihanna rushed to pull Tasha in front of the full-length mirror to get a good look at herself.

They stood in silence for a moment, allowing CoCo to quietly regard her body while Rihanna adjusted the straps of her racy bodysuit. The custom Savage by Fenty silk robe hanging off of her shoulders hid most Tasha's body, but what she could see brought a small smile to her face.

"Cross Fit is full of a bunch a dudebro white boys, but I have to say, it works," she laughed as she turned her body to get a better look.

"I told you! I know a bunch of old bitches that need to take a seat and hang it up. You are not one of them." Finally done with her adjustments, Robyn stood on her tip-toes to rest her chin on Tasha's shoulder and smile. "Now that we're on the same page, you ready?"

Taking a deep breath, Tasha nodded and smiled, "I'm ready."

"Good. Now, get this bitch some wine and turn up the music. She needs to get loose!"

As ordered, CoCo took a break for red wine before settling in the mood of the shoot. Rihanna explained her vision for the afternoon as a beautiful look into the sexiness of motherhood and being a wife.

"It's like Desperate Housewives meets XNXX," she described as Tasha downed the last of her Merlot. "Ho, but make it, mommy."

Though the visual was funny, CoCo understood the intention and used it to fuel her movements from scene to scene. Exaggerated arches while pretending to vacuum or make up the bed felt silly initially until the praise of the photographer began to boost her confidence. In her second outfit, a floral lace teddy, she felt covered enough to be comfortable and exposed enough to feel like the most beautiful woman within 100 miles.

"Look at me like I'm your husband walking into the kitchen after a great night, and you're making breakfast to thank him. Give me those bedroom eyes."

Everyone in the kitchen could sense an energy shift as Tasha bit her lip and gave the camera a coy look over her shoulder. Flashbacks of a scenario matching the request made her stomach flutter with the emotion of seeing her man waltz down the stairs after their first night together.

"Oh, she's feeling it," Tiana smiled as she leaned over to speak to Rihanna. "I recognize that look, T!"

"You fantasizing over there, girl?"

"Let the master work in peace, please. Thank you!"

CoCo's thoughts of Chadwick became a reality when her exhausted husband walked through the front door with both kids in tow. The sight of a full crew roaming his home added an extra layer of anxiety to an already turbulent afternoon. But, taking a step into the kitchen and laying eyes on his wife gave him a second wind.

He watched her charm the room and the camera like a pro.  

He wasn't the only person speechless for her display.

Micah's eyes sparkled as she watched her mother dazzle, and she couldn't help her tiny squeal. The sound drew everyone's attention while she rushed into the room.

"Mommy, you look like a movie lady," she exclaimed.

Tasha turned just in time to intercept Micah's hug before pulling her off the ground. When she looked up to find Chadwick, he gave her an apologetic look.

"I know I said we'd be gone, but Noah was fussy and I -"

"Baby, it's okay." Tasha's laughter caught Chadwick off-guard.

"You...you sure? I can take them to the park or something."

"It's fine! Right, Robyn? It's cool if they stay?"

"Girl, this is your house! It would be very Karen of me to tell you who you can and can't have in here," Rihanna laughed. "Plus, I wanna hold the baby. Gimme!"

Chadwick took Rihanna's request as an opportunity to get closer to CoCo, who welcomed him with open arms and a kiss to the cheek. Leaning in to return the gesture, he made it a point to brush his lips across her ear.

"Keep this outfit for another time. You look amazing."

"Yeah? Maybe you can help me into the next one." The thought of another racy number had Chadwick on high alert and more handsy than he would generally be in front of a crowd. "Hey, now! Get on out of here. You're holding up the crew."

"Bold of you to assume we didn't get all of that. I want some more," Rihanna added as she tickled Noah. "Miss Micah, you wanna take some pictures?"

"Yes! Please please please, Mommy! Pleaseeeee!"

CoCo looked to Chadwick for confirmation that he granted her with a nod and a smile.

"Of course, baby. Let's go find you an outfit."

With some help from the team on set, Micah found in a dress that matched the styling direction of Tasha's bodysuit. The bright sun provided perfect light for the outdoor setting, making the backyard's greenery and the blue water in the pool. Micah was a star from the first click of the camera. For a child that had only been in the world for a little over 6 years, she had knowledge of her angles and how to interact with another person in the shot. Her facial expressions mimicked Tasha's as they posed together under Rihanna's direction. Her apparent excitement to be part of her mom's moment put CoCo at ease.

Soon, Noah joined the shoot for the final 20 frames. His baby giggles infused the perfect amount of energy to finish the day.

Long after the shoot had ended and the house cleared of visitors, Tasha still found herself buzzing. Standing in front of the mirror in the bedroom, she smiled at her reflection.

"You think I could model full time. Like for AARP?"

Her comment made Chadwick choke with laughter before he could respond. "Yes to modeling, no to AARP."

"That's the right answer. Good job, babe." Once she'd had enough of looking at herself, Tasha flopped across the bed and closed her eyes. "Today felt so...good. I've never felt this free before. And seeing Micah look at me like a superhero made me feel important. She is six years old and giving me more validation than anyone in the world. It's wild."

"She thinks the world of you, trust me. We all do."

Popping her eyes open, she got a glimpse of Chadwick smiling down at her, making her feel warm all over. This was the high she's been chasing as she made the journey back to herself. In all of the photos taken and posted for likes and commentary from the public, nothing could compare to the way she felt when her kids told her 'I love you' or when her husband winked at her from across the room. His comments were confirmation of the lesson she'd finally learned. She didn't need to look a certain way for people she didn't know or care about.

All the love and adoration she desired was already around her.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Twenty-Four

Table of Content or Part Twenty-Three

Pairing: Douglas Booth!Nikki Sixx x OC

Word Count: 2.3k

Warning(s): Language, Drug Abuse, Sexual Situations

A/N: Posted it earlier and only a few of you were able to access it for some reason so I’m reuploading it as a new post and maybe tumblr wont be weird about it

Tag List: @unknownoblivion @sinningsixx @edwardtriggerhandzz @lemmyjelly @haileynicoleseavey17 @cierrasixx19 @oskea93 @mgkobsessed @vamprlestat @sharon6713 @itsametaphorbriansblog @miriampraez @allie-mcginn @rebeccaphillips14 @nicholeh7 @fandomshit6000 @lilmou5ie @tamedhearts @divaanya @kingbouji3 @evrsncnewyork @6ixx6ixx @ratedrkohardychick91 @floregrohlssard @oldschoolimagineblog @thanks2pete @abaldboi @swoopygorl @justjodeye @liith-ium @caos18blog @ytwahsog @shamlessobsessions @scarecrowmax @toadspleen @random-internet-user-4471 @solohqrry @loveofmyloif

***Let me know if you want to be tagged

———————————————————————

They performed at the Monsters of Rock festival in Europe in August, and were beginning to be recognized on the streets at home more and more.

Nikki was beginning to dodge questions about our relationship in terms of groupies, while Tansy was dodging questions of rumors concerning the Miss December cover, mainly because she hadn’t been given the green light from Playboy to confirm she got it.

I also think she avoided talking about it publicly because she was embarrassed deep down. Women who posed and were comfortable with it were one thing, but Tansy was never as comfortable with it as she wanted us to think.

By the time everyone got back to L.A., the guys started in on a new album.

I wake up to low, soft strumming of bass notes, seeing Nikki sitting on the foot of the bed with his bare back to me with a notepad beside him.


Every night, even if he’s too messed up to barely function properly, he’s insisting on sex, and attempts to make it as good as he possibly can, as if he still feels guilty for what he said to me when we were fighting over the Tansy situation.

Pulling the covers up to my chest, I crawl to the foot of the bed, wrapping my arms around his torso, my lips pressing to his shoulder. 
He stops playing, his concentration slated, and looks at me from over his shoulder.


“Good afternoon.” He tells me with a little chuckle.


I rarely sleep later than him, and judging by the decline of sunlight through the window, it’s probably near five o'clock.


“Good afternoon.” I reply as he sets his bass aside, his hand reaching behind him pull me around to him so he can kiss me.


It’s sweet, but still rough in his Nikki way, and when we pull away from each other, I’m grinning mischievously, and pushing him back on the mattress.


I straddle him, and he laughs with a tone that emphasizes that he likes where this is going.


“Again?” He asks me in near disbelief, pulling my lips down to his.


“Mmhmm.” I hum while his lips are against mine, my hands unraveling the sheet from my body.


When we finish our three-hour warm up, we clean up and start getting ready to go out.


“Is it safe?!” Robbin calls from the other side of the bedroom door a couples minutes after I step in to the bedroom from the bathroom.


“Define ‘safe’.” I say back, getting a wink from Nikki as he fluffs his wet hair with his towel after he gets his pants on.


“You two aren’t fuckin’ anymore!” Robbin tells me.


I roll my eyes and look at the closed door.


“Yes, it’s saf—” I can’t finish because Nikki’s suddenly pushing me to the bed, getting on his knees on the floor, and burying his face between my legs just as the door cracks open. “Wait, wait, never mind!” I yell, trying to stay focused on warning Robbin, which is hard to do when Nikki’s eating me like he’s starving. 
“I’m tired of you guys thinking you’re sixteen again, and you’re not!” Robbin slams the door like a pouting kid, and I hold back laughter, arching my back and taking a deep breath as reality dissipates around Nikki and me.


After thirty minutes, I’m getting back in to the shower to rinse of my own sweat and cum, stepping back in to the bedroom, as Robbin is just leaving.


“Gross.” He comments at me in passing, about to go out with some of his own friends.


“We’re married!”


“You’re fucking in our room! I’m tired of sleeping in the living room.”
“You screwed Tansy!”


“Because she’s hot! That’s what guys do, Vivian! We screw hot girls! I’d fuck you if I didn’t like Nikki!"


"You’d what?” Nikki asks and I rub my lips together and hold back a laugh.


“I said if I didn’t like you, I would, but I do like you so no worries, Man.” Robbin argues, patting Nikki on the back.


I leave them to bicker, grabbing the clothes I’m wearing tonight before going back to the bathroom to get dressed before putting on makeup and straightening my hair.


By ten o'clock, I’m practically dragging Nikki away from the mirror as he tries to get his hair teased just right, although I told him it looked perfect.


“Nikki, just drive, you look fine.” I tell him honestly, waiting for him to crank the car so we can go.


He continues to pick at his hair, side-eying me.


“At least I’m not dressed like that.” He mumbles and I look down at my black leather skirt, and dark red tank top that mimics tight fitting lingerie with lace along the bust and a little bit of sheer material on the sides.


“Like what?” I ask sharply.


“Nothing.” He leaves his hair alone and cranks the car, but before he can shift gears, I’m grabbing his wrist to stop him.


“No, tell me."


He sighs and looks at me directly, raising his brows.


"I don’t feel like getting into a fight tonight.” He tells me. “And I will because you’re dressed like that.”


“Just because another guy looks at me doesn’t mean you have to try to kill them, Nikki.” I point out.


“They look, they make bets with their friends on whether they can fuck you or not, and then they talk to you with that motive. So I might as well save you both the trouble and time by just kicking their asses when they stare at you.”


“I don’t fight girls off of you."


"Because I’m not dressed like sex.”


“No, you’re just a rockstar with an unfairly attractive face, tan skin, and sexy hair, who wears leather pants tight enough to see your prick through.”


“Oh, please, it’s a known fact that chicks sell sex better than men do.”


“Because we’re smarter?”


“Because you’re like snakes wrapping yourselves around our dicks and sinking your fangs in to keep us by the balls."


"Must be miserable being that weak.” I comment as if I can’t relate, knowing good and well if he didn’t have me wrapped around his finger, I would’ve already gotten tired of him and left.


“I wouldn’t know.” He replies cooly. “Maybe…ask Vince if it is or not.”


I can’t help but laugh, elbowing him over the console and he smiles and shakes his head a little.


We get to the Rainbow for a pre-game meal being met by Tansy, Vince and Tommy at our booth.


“There they are!” Tommy exclaims like he hasn’t seen us in weeks, although we just got off the plane with him a few days ago. “Now, we can officially get this party goin’.” His hand pats excitedly on Nikki’s back, getting the waitress to bring out beers for them, while I opt for Pepsi.


Once we’re done eating and having decently sober conversation for the night, we leave to start whatever mess occurs.


“Where we going?” I ask once we’ve been walking down the street for a couple minutes, noticing that Vince is leading us now, and I grasping Tansy’s hand when she nearly trips on thin air to keep her from falling.


Tommy’s taking my other hand, swinging it back and forth with his like a couple of elementary school sweethearts flaunting our crush on one another on the playground.


“Tropicana so Vince can see his girlfriend.” Tommy and Tansy simultaneously say, exaggerating “girlfriend” in a teasing way.


“Yeah, yeah. whatever.” He rolls his eyes.


“Vince and Sharise, sittin’ in a tree, f-u-c-k-i-n-g.” Tommy sing-songs.


“Fuck off, man.” Vince chuckles, pushing at Tommy with his shoulder. “I’m asking her to move in with me tonight so she doesn’t have to work there anymore.”


“You know, you’ve been awfully romantic with this is one, it’s really outta character for you.” Tansy points at him. “Either you really like her or you’re putting in overtime to get in bed with her."


"Little bit of both.” He tells her and I roll my eyes.


“Why can’t guys be nice to be nice?” Tansy asks me.


“Because ulterior motives are more fun than being not shitty.” I pipe.


“You don’t get to say anything about ulterior motives, Viv.” Vince points out. “Little miss, 'I’m here to support Tommy, but really I’ll just end up underneath the bass player.”


“Yes, Vince. Sleeping with Nikki was my intention all along. I left home to go see you guys play for the first time that night thinking, 'I’m gonna sleep with the bass player’.”


“Sure as hell backfired for me.” Nikki mumbles in a dreadful tone that is painfully serious, and causes an awkward silence to fall over everyone for half a second before Tommy and Vince try to ignore the comment.


When we get to Tropicana, “Looks That Kill” is blaring over the speakers and the drop-dead gorgeous blonde is by the bar in daisy dukes and a bikini top. 
Once Vince and Sharise are done talking, he waves us over while she goes back to finish her work for the night.


I just sit and observe, sipping water while Vince, Nikki, Tommy and Tansy take shot after shot, and eventually take turns slipping in to the bathroom to snort line after line, and–for Nikki and Tansy–smoke heroin.


I stay in my place and mind my own business.


Not my health, not my problem.


Tommy’s a kid in a candy shop looking at all the topless women serving drinks and the wrestling pits drenched in oil and mud with girls sliding around on each other as men cheer them on.


He, Vince and Tansy go to see some girl-on-girl action while Nikki and I are left to ourselves.


“I’m getting another drink.” He tells me, and I grab his wrist and stop him.


“Haven’t you had enough to drink, babe?” I ask him with a smile to avoid him thinking I’m trying to control him.


“Just one more, I promise.” He assures me, kissing me for a couple seconds before going to get a drink.


“Okay, Nikki.” I say to myself under my breath.


He finishes one more drink and then heads for the bathroom…repeatedly.


I go join Vince, Tommy, and Tansy in cheering on random women who, I have to hand it to them, kick ass even when there’s not much leverage or grip available due to being slippery.


Nikki comes back after trip number four to the bathroom, his eyes are doing weird little tricks that I don’t quite remember them doing before and he’s not saying anything, not even when one of us speaks to him.


He’s completely out of it.


The more crowded the club gets, the more I’m aching to leave for a moment get some fresh air.


I tug at Nikki’s jacket sleeve, catching his nearly untamable lack of attention span at the moment, and he looks down at me with pin-pointed pupils pulled tightly into his hazel irises.


“I’m going outside for a second.“ I tell him over the noise.


"I’ll come with you.” He lazily lets out, blinking slowly and I shake my head.


“No, you don’t have to do that, babe, I just need a little air.” I assure him and he nods.


Before I head to the door, I grab at Vince, who’s surprisingly the most sober for now.


“Keep an eye on him, please.” I ask in his ear so he can hear me clearly.
He glances at Nikki and nods.


I make my way outside, taking deep breathes that aren’t tainted by smoke, the smell of vomit and liquor, sex or sweat.


There’s the slightest nip in the air, making it just comfortable enough to be able to stand out here as long as I want to.


I decide to walk around a little bit to cleanse my senses of Tropicana.


My mind is going a mile a minute over things I can’t quite fix, or change, in all aspects of my life. Which leaves me plenty vulnerable to an unexpected and unintentional incident.


The door of an old Ford swings open just as I’m stepping by and knocks me to the pavement, causing some parts of my exposed legs and palms of my hands to be skint up.


“What the hell?!” I go to bitch the culprit out. “Pay some attention next time, ass–” I stop talking, looking up to see an odd combination of short, blue hair, and a completely lost yet sincerely apologetic expression.


“Oh, fuck, I’m so sorry.” He scrambles to help me up, stuttering a little.
Once he helps me up he towers over me the way Tommy does, and looks down at me with his dark chocolate brown eyes as if he can’t form sentences all of the sudden.


“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that, I really didn’t.” He tries to tell me.


“You know, I’ve seen guys do all kinds of bullshit things just to have an excuse to talk to a half-way decent looking girl, but this is definitely a first.”


"Well, I just moved here to the city and still don’t even know how things work, let alone how the girls here work.” He helps me brush myself off, knocking tiny, embedded pavement chips from my calf muscle, opting me to let out a tiny hiss. “Sorry.” He apologizes again at the sound. “I wasn’t paying attention and I opened the door without giving it a second thought.” He explains, coming back up from crouching to look me in the eye.


“Kinda figured you weren’t from around here.” I say, examining his t-shirt and torn jeans and horrendous black, with red trim, trench coat.


“No, Seattle.” He tells me and I rub my lips together. “I moved to have a better shot at getting a band together."


"Band? Don’t tell me you sing.” I brush my hair out of my face when the wind blows a little bit.


“No, bass, guitar, and drums.” He smiles a little. “But, mainly bass.”

“Oh, alright.”

“I’m Duff, by the way.” He introduces himself.


“Like Billy Duffy?” I tease in a smart ass tone.


Ready…


“No, like, Duff McKagan."


I silently repeat the name in my mind, trying to decide whether I like it or not.


It matches his style, that’s for sure.


"Vivian.” I tell him.


Set…


“Like Vivian Leigh?” He mocks my tone from earlier.


“No, like, Vivian Sixx.”


Go.

———————————————————————

Shining Star

(Excerpt)

Pairing: Axl Rose x OC

1988

My ankles nearly roll on each other as I step out of the venue, stumbling in my heels, my heart beat seeming to thump to the rhythm of Lindsey Buckingham’s “Trouble” that I can already tell is rattling the speakers of the car I’m being herded to by security.


My sunglasses stay perched on my nose, shielding my light-sensitive eyes from the prying flashes of reporters, reaching hands that are out to get a touch of me from fans, and I zone out the yells and screams of my name and begging to give someone somewhere attention.


The car door is slammed behind me once I get inside the limo and let out a breath of relief, glancing at my company.


I don’t even speak, taking my jacket off and reaching into my purse to grab the loaded syringe.


“Axl said you should let up on that stuff, Tans.” Steven’s slurred voice erupts in my ears, his head leaned back with his own pair of sunglasses guarding his eyes. “Nikki just died, like, two weeks ago.”


“Last time, Popcorn, I promise.” I lie, wrapping the chain of the crucifix I received for Christmas from my best friend, Vivian, around my arm tightly to act as an aid to let me see my stripped veins better.


I wait until we’re stopped at a red light with plenty of lighting from the building’s around us to help me see better.


The sting of the needle is temporary before peace consumes me, and I’m collapsing.


I nearly died that night.


It was a couple days into the New Year, and ironically enough I had promised my boyfriend that I’d get sober as a New Years resolution.


I didn’t mean it.


If I had meant it, Steven Adler wouldn’t have been attempting to keep a close friend of his alive for the second time in the last ten days.

I was ungrateful.

At that point I had more money than I knew what to do with, an apartment in New Yok, a mansion in L.A., a gigantic beach house on Tybee Island, two Ferraris, a Porsche, and a Harley Davidson and I didn’t even know how the hell to drive any of it, a new boyfriend that treated me like a fucking princess and was already wanting to marry me, yet I was still so fucking unhappy.

My life was give and get: allow an agency and my mother to talk me in to giving myself up to pose nude in nearly every issue of Playboy from the age of eighteen to twenty-five, be one of their most consistent models, get crowned Playmate of The Month in December of ‘84, and follow that up with Playmate of the Year in 1985, and get heaps and heaps of money in exchange for my soul, sanity, ability to trust, will to live, and sobriety.

My addiction had nothing to do with being bored and partying to pass the time and then slipping in to something more serious.

I started on coke to lose weight after being told one-hundred and twenty-five pounds only meant I needed to lose an extra fifteen, started drinking heavily to calm myself down before every shoot, then when I started getting molested at least once a month by people in charge of me at my agency and photographers, alcohol no longer did the trick and I started on heroin and anything else that would numb the self-loathing and guilt I had for bringing all of it on to myself by being a sex symbol and never telling anyone “no.”

My issues started as a way of coping with what I did to earn money, and that’s how it ended.

[zackcornfield]

The Ultimate Zagene Masterpost

as promised, i’ve gone through every official try guys video from the past few years to compile all the Zagene moments (this post also includes The Podcast™). i’ve provided dates and will link to gif sets/tumblr posts for specific moments (because i’m Extra As Fuck). i’ll try to keep this updated with new videos, so check back often (also, please let me know if i forget anything!) 

under the cut, because it’s looooong.

DISCLAIMER: i don’t mean to imply that i know anything about zach and eugene’s personal lives, or that most of these moments aren’t just things between two close friends. was literally just complying this list for a bit of fun, and because i was bored. pls don’t come for me, y’all 

another disclaimer: i’m australian, so some of the dates i use could be a bit off bc i’m something like 18 hours ahead of these two lol

also: i know initially that i said i would include instagram posts and other, non-buzzfeed videos on this list. unfortunately, i did not end up doing so. i’m maybe thinking about doing a part 2 where i include these things? no promises, this list took so much out of me as is

without further ado...

Nov. 13, 2014 - Guys Recreate Kim Kardashian’s Butt Photo

literally first video with these two together (?) and eugene’s already lowkey checking out zach (roughly 0:45-0:47). oh boy.

Nov. 19, 2014 - American Guys Try European Swimwear

zagene riding in the backseat together

“your dick might be huge” - eugene to zach (2:58), followed by eugene staring at zach until he makes a joke. um. ok.

zach checking up on hungover eugene (3:11)

December 30, 2014 - The Try Guys Test The Legal Alcohol Limit

eugene instantly goes to break up the fight between ned and zach (4:41)

during the little bits where they’re testing how drunk they are these two will not stay away from each other… at 4:56 eugene walks from one side of zach to the other to get in between him and everyone else lmao

5:38 eugene reaches out to put his hand on zach’s back for no reason

6:37 (again at 6:54) zach has his arm around eugene, sorta leaning into him. no complaint from eugene “i hate hugs” yang

eugene’s little dance on zach at 7:00

January 18, 2015 - The Try Guys Shoot Guns For The First Time

the boys sittin together at lunch, bein judgey (0:27)

(1:10) whenever i see this, i always think of this post, so it’s making the list

January 25, 2015 - The Try Guys Try ’Fifty Shades’ Style BDSM

the boys beside each other again, this time holding hands! (5:46)

February 23, 2015 - The Try Guys Taste Test Jerky

zach’s lowkey super fond looks at eugene from the backseat throughout the video

March 6, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Magic Mike Stripping

2:15 eugene is sitting on the floor facing zach, rather than keith who he’s actually talking to

“i’ve given lap dances drunk” eugene i’m not even remotely surprised (3:15)

March 11, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Makeup Tutorials

“eugene your hair’s blocking me. eu-eugene? eugene, your hair” (2:27)

April 1, 2015 - The Try Guys’ Naked Sushi Prank

zach stopping to wait for eugene (0:24)

1:05 - ok… love this little bit. eugene smiling, the high five, eugene hitting zach’s glasses off his face, zach’s little giggle. presh.

April 10, 2015 - The Try Guys Try UFC Fighting 

0:00 - not even a second in and already into it. “we love you eugene”

(0:23) - eugene is fully straddling zach. and like… bouncing on him

(0:35) “i feel like zach might squeal like a little piggy and it really excites me”

(2:24) “can we all kick zach real quick” weird way of flirting but if it works for u bud

(3:40) little hard to see but eugene’s leaning on zach

when jessica’s throwing eugene around zach looks thrilled and worried in equal measure

“didn’t come here to fight eugene! he’s fucking crazy” (8:57)

“i landed some pretty solid punches on eugene’s beautiful, beautiful face” (9:12)

eugene like… lifting zach off the ground by his legs? (9:26)

eugene leaning down over zach’s face; keith: “now kiss him like you mean it!” (9:37)

May 6, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Pregnancy Bellies

(4:52) - group hug, but eugene’s got his arm around zach and like,, kinda leans into the back of his neck?

May 7, 2015 - The Try Guys Change Dirty Diapers 

just generally stood suuuper close together the whole video

May 17, 2015 - The Try Guys Try American Ninja Warrior 

“right zach?” (10:14)

10:33 - eugene reaches out to take the towel (offered to zach) to dry him

May 31, 2015 - The Try Guys Hit 90 MPH Fastballs

“goddammit eugene” followed by soft smile from eugene (3:22)

(5:40) eugene reaches out to pull zach’s robe back in place lmao

June 20, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Wedding Dresses

(0:51) “this is my day” - zach, while pointing to eugene, who nods, smiles, and his eyebrows look kinda raised too lol

(1:01) “eugene’s gonna look prettier than any of us”

(1:32) zach’s just like… casually stroking eugene’s legs

(2:27) could they BE pressed any closer together

(2:46) goin in for the smooch… iconic

June 26, 2015 - The Try Guys March In The Pride Parade

the boys at pride…. bless :’)

i have no real specific moments from this vid i just love it so much

June 29, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Not To Die Alone

(1:24) zach: “that’s some good ash.” eugene laughs at this like it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard

(11:23) legendary hug/tackle…. the best, unbeatable, iconic,

July 12, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Irish Step Dance

(0:28) shoulder pat

also dance partners, holding hands, bless

(1:55) “i feel like my butt is tauter” zach turns and raises an eyebrow

(3:15) they go in for a group hug and eugene instantly goes for zach. when it’s clear he won’t reach zach, he pulls away from them all. interesting

August 1, 2015 - The Try Guys Watch Anime For The First Time

(1:17) zach compliments eugene’s hair

(3:06) zach: “yeah i guess we’re having a good time again.” eugene has the biggest smile on his face

(4:51) another compliment for eugene’s hair

(5:07) zach says something, then eugene repeats it enthusiastically and like.. kinda bites his lip?

(5:28) eugene leans over ned so he can talk to zach

these two are so in sync in such little ways like.. correcting ned’s pronunciation (6:03), leaning forward to laugh at ned’s joke (7:10), the hand gesture (7:14)

7:33 holding hands :))

August 3, 2015 - The Try Guys Cosplay For The First Time

8:41 - the boys dancing together

August 29, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Extreme Swimsuits

(4:57) eugene casually checking out zach (”i just saw zach’s penis” “yeah i accidently showed eugene my dick already” “i can still see your dick”)

zach’s eyes go straight (haha) to eugene’s butt when he walks away (5:11)

September 12, 2015 (from some time in August) - The Try Guys Imitate Each Other

“so, the one thing i know about zach is that- besides being adorable-” (0:47)

“i’ve been to many bars with him” (0:53)

“i have never been so attracted to eugene” (1:07)

ok but zach imitating eugene LMFAO

(3:30) zach crashing into eugene for a hug 

September 23, 2015 - The Try Guys Watch K-pop For The First Time

(2:16) eugene like… reading zach’s mind

September 25, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Korean Cooking

the boys cooking together

(0:36) “so eugene’s gonna be my mom” “i am not gonna be your mom” “so i got mom here to help me-” “i am not your mom” “so mom what’s the first step?” “i am not your mom!”

(1:10) eugene feeding zach (”thereee you go”)

(1:41) “you fucked me hard”

(1:47) “eugene’s a mean daddy”

(1:52) hand on the shoulder

(2:42) eugene just looks SO done

(3:04) “we’re a great team” :’)

(6:18) arm around the shoulder 

September 26, 2015 - The Try Guys Recreate Korean Drama Scenes

(2:04) iconic…. zach going in for a kiss. when will ur fave ever

September 27, 2015 - The Try Guys Try K-pop Dance Moves

(3:15) zach: *sniffs eugene* “still smells good”

(3:49) zach (lol and the others) wearing eugene’s clothes

(5:46) “let’s smell him again”

October 29, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Childhood-Ruining Costumes

(4:58) zach’s got his arms wrapped around eugene, trying to pull his costume off

November 1, 2015 - The Try Guys Get Prostate Exams

(2:46) “i’ve never had anything up my butt- well” ???????????

eugene looked like he enjoyed the exam way too much LMAO

December 13, 2015 - The Try Guys Try Therapy

the boys opening up to each other (just all of them in general) :’)

(6:17) as soon as eugene holds out his hands for the others to touch zach immediately reaches out, even before eugene was finished talking

(7:25) “now hug us!!”

eugene tries to wave off the hug until he sees zach’s arms then kinda reluctantly shuffles over

(7:28) ok zach is FULLY cuddling eugene at this point

December 19, 2015 - The Try Guys Break Into A House

(1:18) boyfs ridin off in style

Febuary 7, 2016 - Sexy Edible Lingerie Taste Test

(5:18) zach chose his nipple as the place for eugene to lick, despite presumably knowing it’d give him away bc of all the hair. go big or go home i guess

Febuary 28, 2016 - The Try Guys Play F***, Marry, Kill

(2:06) eugene noticeably reaches out to touch zach, pulls away, then moves his arm back over to grab zach’s arm

(2:17) eugene pats zach on the back

also… not zagene but……. eugene in glasses…………………

March 6, 2016 - The Try Guys Test Their Sperm Count

(5:47) eugene puts his hand on zach’s back again

March 16, 2016 - Which Type of Alcohol F*cks You Up The Most?

(3:28) “bye eugene” “where did he go?” “where does he ever go :(” why does zach sound so sad omg

these two actually weren’t super touchy in this vid which is weird when u look at the last vid where they all got drunk together

March 27, 2016 - Extreme Asian Food Challenge

(1:25) “do you wanna feed each other?” eugene gives a Look to the camera- “…sure”

(2:17) for the life of me can’t work out what eugene’s doing here. is he abt to put his arm around zach? put the phone in his pocket then quickly change his mind? touch his butt? we may never know

(5:19) zach’s “are u being for fuckin real” look still manages to be incredibly fond

(5:49) “keep your screaming to a minimum” “ yEaH eUgEne We’lL KeEp ouR ScrEamiNg to A miNimUm”

April 19, 2016 - The Try Guys Get Style Makeovers

(3:15) “first person who comes to your mind when you think of a well-dressed guy” “eugene” (same)

(8:29) eugene looks lost for words

(9:40) “it’s workin on me”

(12:22) “you look like a deleted scene from cowboy bebop” “that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me” “you’re welcome”

June 17, 2016 - The Try Guys Try Not To Die At Sea

(0:40) eugene helping zach into the water

(1:22) while eugene’s fixing his hair; “i think you look good”

(2:06) eugene holding zach while he pees over the side (one hand right on his butt). good job being supportive? 

August 5, 2016 - The Try Guys Try The Ancient Olympics

(2:43) zach’s rubbing oil into eugene’s butt, which totally isn’t suggestive at all

(3:34) pretty much leaning into each other again, this time while fully naked

(11:15) eugene comforting zach after he kicked him lol

zach has that same worried/thrilled look he has when eugene’s fighting ned that he had during the UFC fighting ep

also unrelated to zagene entirely but steven’s in the background during the wrestling?? omg

(13:54) back to zagene zach goes to help eugene off the ground when he has his ass handed to him

(15:50) eugene shoving zach when he’s being a little shit. i’m also like 90% certain he said “zachary!”

August 27, 2016 - The Try Guys Danish Food Taste Test

(0:19) ok not super zageney BUT i did use this moment in this post (#shamelessspon)

(1:48) “i think we should lady and the tramp this” “no” instant cut to them lady and the tramping the food

(2:47) “i like watching you eat! it’s like watching a little baby eat”

September 12, 2016 - The Try Guys React To Their First Videos

(3:21) zach and eugene sassing ned

(5:06) “look at that big boner i had” “that was NOT your boner” alrighty zach

(5:44) “i didn’t want to hurt you...”

(8:56) zach’s got his leg lying on eugene’s

(9:13) leaning into each other

(9:12) “promise you if we get to 200 videos we’ll fuck each other” can’t wait for The Try Guys Try Guys (i’m definitely not the first person to make this joke)

November 4, 2016 - The Try Guys Try Distracted Driving

(5:11) zach gently brushes hair off eugene’s forehead

(8:47) eugene and zach smiling at each other so softly i’m....

December 12, 2016 - The Try Guys Crash Cars Into Each Other

(1:35) zach’s giggle at “demolition derby is basically backing dat ass up”

(12:34) eugene gives zach the most adoring look

December 17, 2016 - The Try Guys Try The Weirdest Beauty Trends Of 2016

(4:57) eugene’s got his arm resting on zach’s shoulder

February 17, 2017 - The Try Guys Prank Each Other 

(2:05) “you pick the stupidest pranks zach” eugene sounded so giggly here aw

(5:05) eugene absolutely cracks up at zach’s “stupid prank”

(6:13) eugene cracking up at one of zach’s pranks again. genuinely love how happy he seems in this vid

(8:30) eugene leans right over zach to point at his screen and zach doesn’t even think twice about it. doesn’t flinch when eugene touches his face to steal his glasses either 🤔

(8:46) zach’s fond (yet exasperated) face and eugene’s kinda giddy laugh

(8:49) highkey looks like eugene was going for zach’s hand. he settles on his wrist

(8:53) zach’s hand goes to eugene’s to try and pull him away. and then cut to eugene halfway across the room??

(11:11) (make a wish) eugene and zach noticeably walking apart from the others

February 21, 2017 - The Try Guys Try Virtual Reality 

(3:10) eugene hugs zach from behind and looks thrilled with himself

(4:38) eugene leans towards the back of zach’s neck to whisper something to be a lil shit again (”back, demon!”)

(8:22) eugene wanders over to be a shit again, a reoccurring theme for this vid

(9:47, but also earlier (i forget when)) when eugene’s standing with his renditions of the try guys, he has his arm around his version of zach

March 5, 2017 - The Try Guys Take A Friendship DNA Test

(2:42) uh the whole dominant/submissive thing? what kind of kinky shit?

March 12, 2017 - The Try Guys Sexy Alcohol Taste Test

just the fact that these two were paired together for this kind of video

(1:20) “did you put your sex inside my drink, eugene?”

(1:48) eugene leaning right into zach’s personal space

(3:09) eugene looks so challenging when he’s describing the blow job shot. he’s READY

(3:13) “gene i noticed that yours is girthier than mine” eugene’s Look. also the nickname

(3:34) zach is so wide eyed when eugene takes the shot. also eugene definitely looks like he’s showing off

(3:45) “oooh yeah, i’m blowing your job...” “...just take the drink Zach, don’t think about it too much”

(4:04) eugene guiding zach’s head to take the shot???

(4:12) “this is the worst blow job i’ve ever gotten” and all that follows

(5:41) eugene like full-on bites

(6:15) “to zach’s tiny, fuckable body” “ahh... one day”

March 26, 2017 - The Try Guys Wear High Heels For A Night

(3:22) sitting beside each other at dinner

(5:47) eugene’s got his arm around zach, hand kinda on his neck

(6:44) ok... i know some stuff on this list is a bit of a stretch but DEFINITE heart eyes from eugene here

(7:36) eugene’s got his arm behind zach on the wall, leaning into his personal space

(8:25) zach leans into eugene to say something to him

(8:26) eugene’s reluctant to tap out bc he wanted to last the night, so zach suggests they call it a night so eugene can take the heels off without feeling bad

(8:41) eugene has his hands on zach’s shoulders, lets him lead him out

(8:43) eugene’s arm around zach’s shoulders again, hand kinda bunched in his shirt (also, “tonight zach carried me home”)

April 1, 2017 - The Try Guys Drunk Fast Food Taste Test

(0:12) eugene - “when people are drunk, they’re more honest than ever” hey so i wonder why u two get super touchy whenever ur drunk  🤔

(0:17) “my pants are still wet from the other video” “no one- no one wants to see that zach” eugene says, while staring at his butt

(0:39) “don’t eat without me, motherfucker”

(5:30) zagene being all cute and giggly at the end

April 15, 2017 - The Try Guys Take A Lie Detector Test

ok before we begin... #shamelessspon here and here

(1:48) eugene leaning over zach, one arm on either side of him

(2:18) eugene looks so goddamn fond here i’m dead

(4:35) when it’s revealed zach’s made out with a coworker, eugene looks pretty damn smug

also eugene looking progressively more annoyed the more coworkers zach’s said he’s made out with lmaooo

(5:22) eugene wants to fuck zach. literally have nothing to add, it speaks for itself

(6:09) zach reaches out to grab onto eugene’s arm

(7:44) zach grabs onto eugene’s arm again

(8:13) zach reaches out to grab eugene’s shoulder again

(8:35) hey so guess what zach’s doing, yet again

(8:54) eugene wraps his arm around zach’s shoulders

(8:59) eugene’s leaning heavily on zach’s shoulder

May 20, 2017 - The Try Guys Take An Ancestry DNA Test

ok before i begin i absolutely love this post by @foundghosts which might be worth a look if ur into reading body language (i think it’s super cool, which is a surprise to no one following this blog)

June 13, 2017 - The Try Guys Re-Create Photos Of Their Dads

(1:51) supportive bf shaving zach’s chest hair

also zach talking abt finding someone in the voice over when eugene’s the only person in the shot with him?

also this ask that i got

July 29, 2017 - The Try Guys Try The Japanese Tablecloth Trick

(5:33) “just take your pants off”

(6:43) zach and eugene driving everywhere together gives me life

(6:49) mocking each other like 5 year olds smh

August 5, 2017 - The Try Guys Try Cuban Miami 

(9:36) sitting beside each other for a coffee break

(10:35) teamwork on the cigar wrapping

(12:11) eugene’s arm is wrapped around zach

August 12, 2017 - The Try Guys Ski In Speedos

(0:29) [”i see eugene, i click”] zach: “i click! i click!” eugene just looks fond and exasperated 

(1:53) eugene is giving definite heart eyes here (also his fucking HAIR Y’ALL I’M SCREAMING)

(3:41) zach reaching forward to run his fingers through eugene’s hair (living the dream if we’re being real)

August 26, 2017 - The Try Guys 12-Mile Wilderness Adventure

(3:21) zach calling eugene tf out

(5:04) what is this cutesy couple-style photoshoot going on here

(7:40) eugene and zach walking together behind the others

(11:41) during the group hug, eugene has one arm fully around zch while his other is kind of just awkwardly patting keith’s shoulder lmfao

September 2, 2017 - The Try Guys Throw A $300,000 Bachelor Party

(3:27) sitting together in the back seat (literally incapable of driving anywhere if they’re not sitting together i swear)

the shots dotted throughout the video of zach and eugene talking to themselves or the camera and leaning towards each other a lil

(18:15) definitely got arms around each other, also eugene’s smile aw

September 9, 2017 - I Have An Autoimmune Disease

(3:37-3:55) eugene messing around with zach

(8:10) eugene was with zach the first time he got his shot (other try guys at least weren’t there)

September 16, 2017 - The Try Guys Get Makeovers From High School Girls

(8:21) eugene looks pretty flustered when he sees zach in his bad boy get up

(8:35) “nice meme reference!” 

yo but the things zach says when ned comes out in his clothes... u sure ur straight bud

October 7, 2017 - The Try Guys Try Immigrating To America

(0:05) eugene immediately looks to zach after making a joke (looking for validation?)

(4:06) “i think i have a crush on... iranian eugene” “don’t have a crush on fake me”

(5:10) “you’ve been recently widowed” “that means i’m single”

October 14, 2017 - The Try Guys Try Roller Derby

(2:04) eugene glances at zach a couple of times, looking incredibly fond

(2:31) eugene skating towards zach to hold his hand is still the cutest thing ever

(3:03) eugene skating towards zach to make him jump out of the way

(8:06) eugene reaches across ned to touch zach’s hand, for seemingly no reason

October 28, 2017 - The Try Guys Test Who Is The Most Attractive

(2:20) “you’re doing great sweetie”

(20:11) eugene “i hate children” yang: “but think of our children, how successful they’d be”

November 4, 2017 - The Try Guys Become Groomsmen For Keith’s Wedding

(2:06) “take your clothes off, zach”

(8:17) “ok umm... just think about zach naked” this is such a weird thing for eugene to have said and yet i’m not remotely surprised

(13:08) the Look

November 11, 2017 - The Try Guys Bake Bread Without A Recipe

(9:57) great minds think alike :’) (also eugene apparently just lurking around behind zach)

ok also adding on the little smile eugene does whenever zach smiles at him. i’ve noticed this before but i don’t think i’ve brought it up yet

(11:08)  zach mutters something to eugene, shared smile

(14:25) eugene’s classic adoring smile

(17:16) “i’ve been asking for hugs all day!” says zach, looking sulky

November 18, 2017 - The Try Guys Feed Wild Animals In Alaska

(2:26) adorable teasing

(3:49) leaning into each other a little

(6:44) more teasing

also y’all we’ve rlly gotta hand it to zach for not checking eugene out in the clips at the place they’re staying, even if he is straight. like bitch i’m a lesbian but oh boy.....

December 2, 2017 - The Try Guys Make The Ultimate Holiday Calendar 

(9:08) eugene confirms he’s lgbt, to the surprise of absolutely no one

(10:22) zach FULLY checking out eugene’s dick

(12:42) eugene adjusting zach’s scarf thing around his shoulders (i’m not jewish lol there’s probably some jewish name for it) - EDIT: it’s called a Tallus or talit

(15:30) “touch my butt” “i’ll hold his butt”

16:52, 16:54, 17:23 zach tries to kiss eugene

(17:23) “wow gimel that’s three kisses!!” “noo! that’s not how it works!”

December 11, 2017 - Not Too Deep Podcast with Grace Helbig

(19:10) “yeah we hang out more than’s probably healthy at this point” [what percentage of your weeks are spent with each other] “um, approximately the amount of time you’d spend with a significant other” “i was gonna say 80, it that too high? like my waking hours” [and sometimes when you’re sleeping!] “it has happened, yeah”

(20:09) (grace brings up zagene) zach: “i love this podcast already!!” eugene: “you know, zach loves that”

(20:20) zach wants to do a try guys recreate fanfic video. eugene is more reluctant. read into this as you will

(21:04) “he’s a classic bottom, i’m a more prototypical top”

(26:48) zach is “obsessed” with the idea of a fanfic recreation vid

(29:13) another example of zach offhandedly mentioning how hot he finds eugene

(33:34) “you’ll get married, you’re a romaaantic”

(35:57) great minds think alike :‘)

December 16, 2017 - Male Sex Symbols Throughout History

(6:46) ICONIC ass slap

and eugene’s winning smile immediately after

January 27, 2018 - The Try Guys Race Dune Buggies

(2:31) why do they literally sound like parents arguing abt who has to tuck their child in LMAO

zach also puts his hand on eugene’s back a second later

(2:40) eugene’s resting his head on zach’s shoulder as he leans forward

(5:05) eugene doing a mini photo shoot of zach kills me every time

(13:14) eugene initiates the group hug, but doesn’t extend it to ned and keith when they come over

also side note but zach fits into eugene’s arms so well it’s adorable

February 10, 2018 - The Try Guys Race Dog Sleds

(3:59) watching them goof around together is so sweet

(6:04) zach’s like got his hand fisted in eugene’s jacket

(7:03) why is it whenever we get a candid shot of these two they’re always standing suuuper close together