#not exaggerating at all about the catatonic state my overactive flight response is the gift from my childhood that just keeps giving

[vigilantejustice]

just picturing sweet innocent little melting moments conspiring with each other inside their packaging and deciding to blow up carfunkel's engine as soon as your turned your back. also gravity-defying carfunkel zooming down a highway on only 2 wheels. ngl your particular brand of neuroses is pretty funny at times?

tbf the directors cut extended edition of the melting moments thought was essentially “if you choose not to do this thing that is nice this bad thing will happen and you will deserve it because why wouldn’t you just do the nice thing?”

did buy the melting moments because my car dying in the middle of traffic would send me into an instant state of catatonia. which then makes me think about how at this point buying the biscuits isn’t all that nice a thing because it’s only just about making sure my car won’t choke out. we love cognitive distortions.

boy oh boy the wheels thing was stupid stupid because hello gravity? physics? hello reality?

anyways. it’s all entirely nonsensical and has no basis in reality but if i’m going to be this neurotic it’s all i can ask for it to at least be a little funny.