Revenge
Musical beetlejuice x reader
A little self indulgent ramble based off what happened to me in February last year
The day before my birthday I was layed off due to new management
...
Everything was different now, you went from top dog, to lowest man on the pole, you no longer came home from work in a good mood, you were always run down and emotionally empty, he hated to see you like this, but you refused his intervention.
"Come on babes, itll be great, I wont even kill 'em" beetlejuice would beg, you would only shake your head in response
"Beej, I appreciate it, truly I do, but I cant just-"
"Sure ya can babes, 3 little words and-"
"Beetlejuice, I know, I just cant sick you on my new boss, yes they're changing everything, and I dont like it, but that's no reason for to let a demon loose in a mall"
The ghoul huffs and flops dont next to you on the couch, pouting like a child.
"I do appreciate Beej, thank you, but I dont think its right" you sigh, leaning into the ghoul, if your attention was drawn to him rather then the tv you would have seen a much pinker beetlejuice.
...
With a slam of the front door, you come home from work, within a flash beetlejuice was infront of you, as per normal,
"Welcome home sweet stuff, so I was-" he stops dead in his tracks, you were crying, red, blues, and purples, flash through him, as if he was unable to decide what he was feeling.
"Babes?"
"I GOT LAYED OFF" you sobbed
"WHAT?!" Beetlejuice settles on a fiery red, there was no way in hell you were layed off for doing something bad, you were his little goody two shoes, an honest hard working breather.
You push past the ghoul and stumble to your room not wanting beetlejuice to see you so emotionally vulnerable, scared he'd laugh at you. Beetlejuice just watches you leave, staring at the hallway you vanished in, red fading to a more purple hue, the ghoul knew you liked to be alone when you were upset, he wasnt too good with the whole comfort thing, but damn he wish he could help ya.
...
The following morning you left for work without seeing beetlejuice, which was odd, but whatever, you weren't exactly up for being social at the moment.
"I know you only have a few days left here y/n, but I'm going to need you to train your replacement" the words felt like a punch in the gut, was your boss serious? You excused yourself to the washroom shortly after this exchange.
"Beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice"
The lights in the bathroom flicker, and a familiar green smoke fills the room, along with a the familiar gravely chuckle of the ghoul you summoned
"Sugar! You missed me~" the demon cheers pulling you close into a tight huge
"I want revenge" you mumble
Beetlejuice quirks an eyebrow at you "what?"
"I want revenge beetlejuice, I was wrong, my boss deserves whatever you're gonna dish out" you push away from the ghoul who was know buzzing with excitement and practically glowing
"Oh baby, finally, its showtime"
Beetlejuice grabs your arm and drags you back to the little shop you worked at, no one payed him anymind
Your boss was too busy gossiping with your replacement, you weren't stupid, you knew they were friends, but getting you to train them AFTER RECEIVING a two week notice, that was the final straw.
"All right sweetheart, this ones a REAL panty dropper" the ghoul nudged you as you let out a soft laugh.
To make a long story short the fire department had to be called.
...
Bonus
Based off what happened shortly after my 2 week notice
9am
Your phones buzzes to life, you groan and grope around for the device
"10 more minutes babes" beetlejuice moans, the ghoul had snuck his way into your bed while you slept and was now spooning you.
"B?"
"Hmmm?"
"Remeber my old boss?"
"The one I made piss themselves? Yeah"
You shift abit, sitting up, holding out your phone, showing a text that read
'Y/n I am hung over, can you please cover for me this morning? I need you to open the store'
Beetlejuice squints at the text mumbling the text outloud, a slight pause before a thunderous laugh
"Are they fucking joking? They drop your cute little ass then they got the balls to ask that? That's gotta be a joke"
You chuckle "unfortunately not"
You tap away at your phone before placing it back where you found it, and slipping back under the covers with your demon.
"What did you say babes?"
"Lol fuck no"
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Print: “How do you 'accidentally' achieve immortality?"
note: abt ur prompts.. i ….actually was planning a fic abt immortality but i dont think itll be done for ages so i slammed this one out. i also made a few posts abt superhero aus btw :’). i watched hercules for the first time in like a decade bc of ur other prompt and wow…. hades is still so funny DSJFHSKH ok anyway i prolly wont write a lot in the coming month bc semesters starting next week BUT i can type out some headcanons for prompts u give me, if u guys r interested in that?
i didnt proofread this and i dont want to because i am Lazy anyway thank u sm for continuing to talk to me abt chlodine yrs down the road. pls feel free to send in ur chlodine headcanons or if u jus wanna scream abt them
Nadine’s been alive for a long time, and so nothing really surprises her anymore. But, then again, Chloe is always her exception.
//
They first meet in India, only a passing thing. Being alive for so long, well, it gets boring. Nadine, also, could never really handle being purposeless. She enjoys having goals and working hard to achieve them, and she definitely enjoys the brief period, afterwards, where she relishes in those achievements.
It was easier, before, to find purpose: fighting. There were a lot of wars and Nadine was good at it. She was, and is, by all accounts, remarkable. However, to preserve her anonymity, she allows herself to dissolve into the unknowns of history.
She has had many names, most of which she has since forgotten. But, her first, she will not forget: Nadine. It is that name she gives to Chloe, and it is the one Chloe knows her by.
At that time, in India, she had nothing to do. It seemed the age of fighting as she knew it was coming to a close, and she grew bored.
Of course, this wasn’t a new experience; Nadine can hardly find anything she has not experienced. Usually, she travelled. She’s been to most places, but they were always changing, and this was something she appreciated on a deep level.
India, she has not visited in almost four decades.
On her first night, she eats a feast on her own. The restaurant owners were impressed, to say the least.
It is routine, her travels. During the day, she sees the sights, explores the places that have changed the most and visits those that she loved the last time she was here. When nightfalls, again, she feasts. Sometimes, when she isn’t too tired, she’ll take someone to bed.
This, she does rarely. It is, after all, hard to find a woman interested in other women in this world. Harder, even, to find one who isn’t interested in a long term investment, since Nadine is not very interested in the part where she outlives everyone. It isn’t a pressing issue, though. She has needs, sure, but she is patient, and sex did not fall very high on her list of priorities.
Besides, she understands. The consequences of being a woman like her are grave and not a lot of people would want to risk their lives for a fling.
Chloe is only her second in India.
There is a river, a half day’s walk away from where she’s staying. It is her second to last night in India, and there aren’t a lot of things she is itching to see, so she decides to make the walk.
By the time she gets there, the sun is hanging low in the sky, not yet set, but almost. She’s sweating from the heat and the oppressive humidity characteristic of the Indian climate. So, naturally, she unbuttons the first few buttons of her shirt and leans over the edge to splash water over her face.
It is a relief on her skin, and she looks up to gasp out a breath when she sees her. Chloe, shameless creature that she is, watches her.
Nadine doesn’t know how she didn’t notice the woman lounging in the water before now. Bewildered, Nadine blinks at her and feels very bare, suddenly hyper-aware of the droplets running down her face and into her shirt.
“Hello,” Nadine finally says. She is good with languages—there isn’t a lot to do when you’ve been alive for a few centuries.
“Hey.” She swims over until Nadine can see her smirk with distinct clarity, until her bare shoulders come up, but does not go farther up the shore. “Not from around here?”
Nadine raises an eyebrow. Clearly not. “No,” she says.
“Huh. Chloe, nice to meet you,” says she, extending a wet hand from the water. Nadine has to slosh into the water to take it and give it a firm, short up-down shake.
It’s a strange name, given the context, and this whole thing takes her off guard. She stupidly blurts out: “Nadine.”
Chloe’s grin becomes wider. She doesn’t try to hide the way she eyes Nadine’s open shirt. Nadine isn’t dense, either, so she knows when there is an opportunity she could take, is she wanted.
She’s not sure yet.
“And you? Are you from around here?”
Humming noncommittally, Chloe stands, abruptly, to her full height and walks around Nadine to the shore. She is naked, and Nadine has to swallow a lump in her throat.
Nadine has seen a lot of women, and she can say with certainty that Chloe is one of the most beautiful she has seen. She tries not to stare and succeeds, given that she has excellent self-control. Though she will admit, Chloe certainly tested her in that moment.
“Where are you from?” Chloe asks as she picks up a shirt strewn across a rock and slips into it. Now, Nadine notices the pair of pants and shoes hidden behind the rock.
Nadine smiles, wryly, aware that she is giving more information than she is receiving. “Africa.”
Chloe doesn’t seem to take offence at her brusqueness. Just laughs. “Ah.” Then, because Chloe is so brave and so young, barely thirty by the looks of it, she stoops and holds up her pants, and asks, “Should I bother with these or are we going to address… what should I call it? The tension?”
Oh, how they address it.
After, as Chloe disappears into the trees on the other side of the river, Nadine realizes that she is entirely, profoundly, surprised.
//
Nadine has met many bold women; she can be one herself when she wants to be. Chloe, she never really forgets, but she is filed away into a tiny corner of her mind, fading away until Nadine never really thinks about it unless she is alone at a river and has run out of things to think about.
Besides, World War II has started, and she’s occupied with killing those Nazi bastards. She doesn’t enlist in any army—can’t exactly fly under the radar there—but she has connections and resources, and works perfectly well alone.
In the face of all this, Chloe is not forgotten, but she is not remembered.
And Nadine’s life goes on, and on, and on, as it is wont to do.
//
Nadine doesn’t know why she never dies. It just happened or, more precisely, it just never happened.
Her parents did. She never really knew her father, as her mother raised her, but she does know he died. Her mother, she held as she passed.
Years later, people began to talk. Nadine turned thirty, and that was it.
She doesn’t know if she can die at all, but she isn’t interested in testing her theories. She has avoided fatal wounds for so long; she won’t stop now.
Sure, she has suffered and has felt like she might die, but she doesn’t think she wants to die. There are so many things she wants to know.
So, she decided, a century into her life, that she would not question it. She isn’t at all old enough to have been there for the Trojan War, but she does know not to look a gift horse in the mouth.
//
It is the 2000s and Nadine begins to feel a little existential. She will not fight in wars now, given the stakes and, especially, given her moral compass. Well, at least not official ones. She has accepted that she is a little bit of a vigilante, and she’s focusing on bettering her own home.
Always levelheaded, she never bites off more than she can chew. She only takes to the streets every few weeks. In the meantime, she decides to get into academia.
If she’s so keen on learning, why wouldn’t she go to school? Human achievement is impressive!
She has one PhD already and is working on her second. She has just started, meeting her advisor for only the third time, when she sees a flash of red in the hall, heading towards the History department.
It’s a woman with jet black hair, ponytail swinging. Before Nadine can think to squint, she’s rounded the corner and is gone.
Blinking, Nadine turns away and heads to the courtyard. She likes to sit on the grass and do her research there. Small pleasures.
It’s been an hour, maybe two, when a shadow casts over. Strangely, she feels her heart start to beat faster before she even looks up.
“Hello,” she says, throwing an arm over her forehead to shade herself from the afternoon sun.
Chloe in the flesh. She puts on the same old smirk and looks down at Nadine with her hands on her hips. “Hey, you.”
Nadine raises an eyebrow as she sits down and makes herself at home on Nadine’s picnic blanket, among her sea of books.
“Well, look at you.” Chloe keeps on grinning, shark-like. “You haven’t aged a day.”
“You’re too kind,” Nadine says, thinly. “And neither have you, by the looks of it.”
Dismissively, Chloe waves a hand and tosses her ponytail over her shoulder. “No need to flatter me, you’ve already gotten into my pants.”
“I haven’t forgotten.” Much, at least, she thinks. Then, wonders if, perhaps, she is dreaming.
“That’s nice.” Chloe leans closer, growing serious but retaining her persistent underlying curiosity. “Oh, Nadine, what are you?”
Nadine snorts. “Always so bold.”
She shrugs. “Places to be, things to know, people to do. I’m a busy girl.”
Like a shark, Nadine thinks again. She keeps her mouth shut for a few moments, just watching Chloe watching her. As Nadine recalls her memories of Chloe, she notes that Chloe mostly hasn’t changed. Finally, she leans back on an arm and says, “Looks to me like you have all the time in the world.”
“Hm.” Chloe lifts a hand, maybe to touch her arm, maybe to push her hair out of her face, maybe to cup her cheek. Nadine will never know. She tenses, instinctively swaying back a little. Chloe’s hand drops down, but she keeps on smiling. “You’re immortal, then. All the time in the world.”
Nadine doesn’t say anything, just waits for Chloe to draw her conclusions.
“How long have you… been like this?”
Nadine pretends to think. “About a century or five now. You?”
“Well, I was thirty-four when I met you,” Chloe wonders aloud, tilting her head as she does the math. At this, Nadine frowns and, upon seeing this, Chloe huffs a laugh. “Yes, actually thirty-four.”
That makes her roughly two centuries old. Nadine doesn’t know how to feel about this, about everything, about Chloe. She had been, to her knowledge, alone in this for three centuries. Never once had she met someone else like this, and she didn’t want to, she doesn’t think. She had always been slow to trust.
She never tried to think about this too hard; she doesn’t know how it works—is she contagious? But none of the other women turned immortal after going to bed with her. Still, she worries at her lip and examines Chloe.
“How?”
“How am I like this?”
She nods.
Chloe raises an eyebrow. “Quid pro quo.”
Nadine rolls her eyes. “I don’t know. I just never died.” She sighs, harshly, and closes the book in her lap with a full clap. “I don’t know.”
“That’s alright,” Chloe says, gently. This time, when she reaches out, to touch her wrist, Nadine lets her. Chloe looks down at the point of contact, seemingly charmed. Then, after a beat, meets Nadine’s eyes again and smiles. “Well, I don’t know how exactly it worked, but this was an accident.”
“…what?” Nadine scoffs. “How do you ‘accidentally’ achieve immortality?”
Chloe looks sheepish now. “I went into an ancient temple and mucked around, and maybe I broke something, and… well, here I am.”
Suddenly, struck by the urge to lie down for a decade or at least go somewhere more private for this discussion, Nadine shoves her books into her bag and stands. Chloe, startled, mirrors her movements and then stills as Nadine rolls up the blanket and easily hefts everything up.
“Uh, what’s going on?”
Nadine picks up her baseball cap and puts it on, and then sweeps an arm towards the paved path. “We’re going to my apartment.”
A little dumbly, Chloe follows along. “Who’s bold now?”
Nadine gives her a look, and Chloe just smiles, looking away with a shrug. They make the journey in silence, Nadine’s is a stubborn one, and Chloe’s obliging. When they reach the apartment, Nadine lets her in first and gestures to the couch. It’s not a very big apartment, but it’s comfortable and in an alright neighbourhood.
After Nadine puts her bag away, she comes back to see Chloe leaning over the back of the couch to look out her window. She twists back around as Nadine sits.
“You alright?”
Nadine looks up at her, eyes hooded. “Ja.”
Chloe smiles, a kind one. She has such an expressive face. Nadine wants to run her hands over the dips and curves of it. Wants to feel a little more grounded in reality—is she really not dreaming?
The urge to just ask disappears in a moment as Nadine comes back to herself, feeling safer on her own turf.
“So, this is where you’re from.” It’s not a question, but Nadine nods anyway.
“Originally. I don’t remember exactly where but I grew up farther inland and then moved to the coast later before my mother passed.” Nadine rubs a hand at her temple. Tired. “They both died. I’m the only— I was the only one. For the longest time, I was the only one.”
Chloe shifts, an unidentifiable emotion drifting across her face. “Nadine.”
She sighs and says, “I don’t want your pity.”
“You don’t have it,” she says, not ungently. “It’s been a long time.”
For once, Nadine allows herself to give in. She leans over until she falls, turning her face to press her nose into the hard muscle of Chloe’s tensed thigh, just above the knee. She hugs her arms to her chest and counts her breaths. Chloe sighs, too, and puts her hand in Nadine’s hair.
Nadine’s back is to Chloe.
It’s been a long time.
//
So, this is how it happened.
She was abandoned by her mother and raised by a father who wanted a son. He loved her, regardless. He just taught her the ways of his trade.
Her childhood was spent scaling the shelves of libraries as he did his research and sitting uncomfortably still as he spoke to “experts” in their homes. When she was old enough, by his standards, he took her out to ancient ruins, and they explored.
It could be dangerous; she broke a few bones on these adventures. Most never healed properly, and so bumps and scars littered her body.
The worst, the one that almost killed her, occurred in the temple.
Her father passed a few years before, to disease. She carried on his work, suddenly alone. His life’s work: a crumbling ruin.
She had spent days scouting it out, hidden behind a waterfall, like in the legends. She was nervous. Afraid that her father’s work would amount to nothing, that the life she had led without him would’ve turned out to be a waste.
So, she spent days by the falls and walking along the river. It was there that she met Nadine.
She had thought Nadine was a figment of her imagination at first, peeking out from the top of the water. A beautiful, sweaty spirit of the wilds, dressed like an average person.
A blessing she received.
That night, she went in. There were traps, which she expected, and treasures, which she had desperately hoped for. In the centre, buried underneath layers of chambers, was the Tusk.
She got greedy.
Traps triggered—
The Tusk, she held to her chest—
She curled over, protecting it from falling rubble and—
The tip, sharp and shiny, punctured her middle. It was shallow, but still, she cried out and tripped, and the spear she landed on went too far in to be considered shallow.
She doesn’t remember the details; all she knows is that she came back to herself while crawling out the collapsing entrance, sticky with blood.
She hid the Tusk away, for later, and stumbled her way to the nearest town, broken spear sticking out from her ribs.
Half a year later, freshly healed and free from the doctor, she went back. The Tusk was still bloodied, and a gem from the tip of the Tusk had fallen out somewhere. At least, it made up for all her suffering in gold.
In the face of all that, Nadine was not forgotten, but she was not remembered.
//
Feeling awkward and uncomfortable, having been vulnerable for the first time in almost half a millennia, Nadine sits up and grimaces. Chloe opens her bleary eyes and stretches.
“What time’s it?”
Nadine could look at her watch, but she grabs hold of Chloe’s forearm. “Does it matter?”
Chloe looks down and frowns. “I suppose not. What’s happening?”
“Do you want to address the tension?”
Chloe’s muscles relax slowly. She kicks her sneakers off and, in one swift movement, shrugs Nadine’s hand off and settles into her lap. Her mouth descends onto Nadine’s.
This time is almost like the last, fast and sloppy. Except they do it three more times, at least, and afterwards Chloe settles in beside her and stays till morning.
//
Nadine also has many scars, and Chloe maps them all out just as Nadine does to her.
//
“So, am I the older woman or are you the older woman?”
Nadine bites into her skin, licking a soothing stripe along the scar tissue there.
Chloe groans and looks down. “Does that mean I should shut up?”
Nadine gives her an unimpressed look. “Yes.”
“Okay,” she breathes, hand flying to the back of Nadine’s head. “Whatever you say.”
//
South Africa is best experienced in the weeks after Summer has passed, in Chloe’s very vocal opinion, and maybe that’s why the days she spends holed up in Nadine’s apartment feels a little like paradise.
She is not the sentimental type, and Chloe even less so, but there is something to be said for attachments. She had forgotten.
Chloe even admits that she was only here because she saw Nadine’s picture and wanted to use Nadine for information on why she‘s the way she is. Nadine doesn’t take it too personally, because she would’ve done the same, probably.
It ends, of course, as all things do. Not permanently, but Chloe isn’t the type to stay still, and Nadine’s set her sights on finishing this damn degree.
They agree, in five years, they will return to the tree, the patch of grass, and try again.
//
Nadine feels like she has aged the five centuries she had powered through almost numbly in the span of those five years.
They kept in contact because neither of them is the type to make significant, corny gestures like that. Over text, Chloe echoes the sentiment.
For Nadine, it is as if Chloe had barged in, reminded Nadine that she was in control of the remote and that hitting the fast forward button on life wasn’t the only option.
//
“Why do you chase after violence?” came her voice, tinny over the phone. She was in Russia.
“Do I?”
Chloe hums. “All your wars, your crusades. You insist you don’t want to die and yet…”
Nadine raises her eyebrows and finishes typing out her sentence before pushing back on her desk chair. Her first instinct is to be defensive, but Chloe starts to hum tunelessly, and it reminds Nadine that not everything is a fight to be won and— “Ah.”
“Do you wanna talk about something else?” Chloe laughs, then, and jokes, “My abandonment issues? Inability to sit still? Maybe how I’m greedy and selfish?”
Nadine smiles softly. “It’s okay.” She clears her throat. “I think I just got scared of losing people and just, frankly, losing in general, with life and all. I took being independent to the next level. I forgot the value in doing things senselessly, and in a way that’s exactly what I did.”
“How do you mean?”
Nadine shrugs even though Chloe can’t see. “I don’t know why I’m immortal, and I didn’t want to know. What makes me deserving of eternal life and not anyone else? So, I thought only of what I would do with this and doing those things. I’m good at fighting. Why wouldn’t I fight? And I can’t die—there are causes I could give myself to.
“I mean, there were moments, in between, where my thought would wander, of course.” Nadine pauses, feeling nonsensical. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to explain it.”
“That’s alright. I get it.”
“I know. Thank you.”
“Anytime, love.” Another breathy chuckle. “Literally, anytime. From now until the rest of eternity.”
//
“Hello,” Nadine says when she feels a shadow loom over her.
There’s a rustling, and then a kiss to her cheek. “Hey there, sleeping beauty.”
It’s been five years.
Nadine opens an eye and sees Chloe peering down with her stupidly beautiful smile. Her fingers graze at Nadine’s cheek, featherlight, and Nadine’s touches over them. Warm.
“So weird how you haven’t aged a day.”
“Ja, I didn’t get a chance to develop stress wrinkles since you left.”
Head thrown back, wind blowing her hair aside, Chloe laughs. Nadine thinks there hasn’t ever been a surprise as nice as Chloe since the dawn of time.
Stooping over, Chloe kisses her.
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Also im sick of obnoxious japanese eaters
Things ive found out are myths here
1) everyones nice.
No. Everyone smiles hard to cover up whatever assholery theyre doing - if theyre supposed to be nice to you. Public people are the same as usual... except theres alot more shoving
2) everything about school
They don’t pay for school. Its free. Just like ours. Except private school. Just like ours
They are not MORE overworked in school nor do they study more. Their rules are much loser. And just like the states, teachers have no real authority- but unlike the states - the students do not fear repercussions. They can be touched though but thats more because japanese people think its fine to touch each other a lot - ya know. Just dont hug as an adult - but all other invading of some kind of private bubble is fine
3) SLURPING No thats not just a “it shows you love the food!” Bs. Just like the states, the people you hear disgustingly slurping just eat loud and are gross... imo... people here dont seem to think its gross but far more people eat like civilized humans and dont slurp everything from solids to actual liquids.
K like every time the past two days ive had to be near people slurping their fucking food and as a person who HATES hearing people eat... its why im bitching here. LETTUCE DOES NOT NEED SLURPED
4) just anything they call “culture” they used a pretty word to cover for “thats just the dumb thing we do here” its literally like if we said aggressively speed driving and cutting people off is new yorkers culture
Japan has a lot of history and traditions. But mostly they have a lot of bs that theyre just too stubborn to acknowledge and change so they lable it culture. Any changes they make are pretty much like when my great grandmother got a cell phone.
She only turned it on to charge it and make a phone call - leave a voicemail saying that she called - and then would turn it back off. It wasnt ever even on long enough for her to need to charge it.
But in her mind no one could complain that she didnt have one. And the only emergency in her mind was her needing to call you - not vice versa. She wouldnt use it for any other purpose and generally resented its existence. She hated watching anyone else use their cell phones to check the time or take pictures or play games or have lenthy conversations.
Yea. Thats basiclly japan with everything new. They have it. But they dont use it , and its possibilities scare them so the old ppl say its not allowed to be used unless the old people need to use it
Sorry man i hate everywhere i am. My aparment is next to a bar that looks permanently closed during the day. I had no clue it was there till after i moved in and the loud karaoke blared into my window every damn night
My train line is a nightmare and if you wanna see the worst japanese people can be. Ride the train during rush hours
My post office is far away and they refuse to ring my doorbell when i have a delivery and instead just leave slip - if you dont hike over in their made up time period they throw your stuff away
No one will actually help you with serious stuff. They just smile and say sorry and run away — customer service. Yea. Not customer service. They could just as easily be a manican with a smiley face - itd serve the same purpose.
Theres too much paperwork constantly all the time about everything
Nothing is online
Another thing that prompted me for this “this is japanese chocolate”
Cool. I got that its japanese. Im in japan. Everything people point out for me “its japanese____” fucking imagine if we felt the need to point out every damn item as “american” in the states. Why? What is the meaning of this?
They gave me a table to sit at at this school. A table. That they make lunch on and put all their supplies on. A dude just kicked my chair as he came over for some shit. Why am i sitting at a table? Very very few japanese people ive worked with dont make me feel like an adopted pet dog that theyre not sure if itll bite. Dog. Not new person. They literlly have the children fetch me...
And ive grown so so very tired of being asked questions with the intention of having me overhype japan while maintaining that im so stupid that i know absolutely nothing about the country
98% of japanese people assume that you think of japan like youve never even heard of their country before arriving and that you just arrived two days ago
Also. Maybe they think their test scores and clases are so much more difficult because they cant seem to fathom that most other countries schools function the same way as theirs
Yesterday a teacher said “ah theyre so overworked. They have alot to remember” i thought she was about to tell me how many units were on their exam or something... no “english, japanese, science, math, history, pe, food class, art! Too many things. Theyre very overworked”
..... are you for real? Im pretty sure every fucking school has those subjects if you switch out japanese for the countries native language.... this is NORMAL
Im sorry. I know the reason anyone talking to me like this might not like me. Cause im not gonna go WOWWW SUGEII?!?!? So much stuff!! Poor them!
No. Yeah? Thats school...
Look im not an asshole to my kids. If they can manage to tell me any information about their life in english or simple japanese i can translate - i act surprised/ or am if their english is super good.
But adults... no man. Learn some stuff about the outside world. Youre not specifical
Also dating boys here is just like back home except they wont block you and they respond less
Instead of getting “nice” “oh” “idk” and “maybe” as there fading messages - they just leave you on read. Or give you some random information that you didnt ask about that has no relevance to the ‘convo’
Also also. “Speak slow” they dont say this in a ‘my english is not good so speak slower’ way. They say this in a ‘i felt really good about my english until you spoke at a normal pace and my classes and ass-kissing white dudes have taught me that enlgish is spoken slow and percisely so if you dont speak with a japanese accent, your fast english is wrong’
Whatever but like... could you return the favor by speaking japanese slowly. Speak it the way you want me to speak english....
Telling them to speak slow results in something like
... nihon..de〜 nan mabdnshsnabsjsnjsbshssnbsjsbsjshsh ka?
Woah ok... something in Japan... couldnt catch the rest of that
Id be more understanding of this. Its hard to speak slow. Lets both acknowledge this and not - teachers compalining to principals and boys... (1) sending me a fucking video on how to speak my own damn language properly
Also. Do you know how upsetting it is to listen to a student say something perfectly but before i get to praise them - have the japanese teacher jump in and “correct” them...... no no dude please. I know youll have a fucking meltdown if i say no your ways wrong. But now this student is so confused desperately staring at me positive theyre correct and all ive come up with to do is smiling and nodding at them while repeating the way they said hoping the japanese teacher wont notice/get offended
Also togo food... if its not american fast food... generally you cant take it to go... its sad. I have no friends. I just wanna take this home to eat in front of my tv. This isnt serious. Its just a minior inconvenience
Also joking... my japanese isnt good enough to joke. And... idk how... cant explain. The other day a student asked whats my favorite food
And another went hamburger?!? Mcdonalds!!?
I wanted to comment.. but. At least elementary students understand sarcasm. Their teachers dont. And whether the middle schoolers understand and just dont care is up in the air.
Oh! And. I was right last week when i didnt trust my teachers saying that the obvious bullying was just a misunderstanding and the obvious targets fault. Another straight up teacher said some kids have left the school because of bullying and theyre really awful when left alone in the rooms... i told him thats why we cant go unsupervised in america. Japan says the students are just perfect upstanding citizens, so much more caring and mature than other students. Nope. Middle schoolers will be middle schoolers no matter what country.
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