#now at 24 i feel like a holllowef out shell of s person
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reading back old posts on here from when I was a teenager is like. I was so normal what the fuck happened to me
#i had normal problems and normal feelings#I don’t want to go work my retail job blah blah my boyfriend can’t hang out tonight I’m sad :(#like oh my god#now at 24 i feel like a holllowef out shell of s person#or s humanoid synth robot imitating human behavior with none of the soul or emotions#as miserable as I was sometimes I would pay real money to Feel Things as deeply as I did back then#I was an active participant in my own life and now I just kind of sit quietly and watch my life happen#like Bella in her depressed era after Edward left her#sooo annoying#even this concept which is objectively deeply concerning the only feeling I can muster up about it is a vague irritation#like oh man :/ parts of me are missing and I fear I may never access True Depth if emotion ever again. bummer :/#of*
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