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iamthenerdqueen · 10 months

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The Red String of Faith - The Mall Episode: One-Shot

Idol!AteezXOCs Soulmates!ot8AteezXOCs OCXOC Slight Social Media AU!

slight twigger warnings: SMUT IN THIS CHAPTER!!! Polyamory, group of 10, two OC's -feel free to replace one OC with yourself if you'd like- , listen this is an idea me and my best friend had and is something for fun read at own risk, not edited as always, also we are starting to explore themes such as bxb and gxg if thats not for you, this story may not be for you.

A/N: Hi all, this one shot goes with our story but is just a fun filler and little something something on the side. You can read this outside of the story or not read it at all. Both are okay! Enjoy :)

Masterlist

Going to the mall was a common thing for Lia and Lyra, just not this mall. After their flight back from spending time with their soulmates Ateez at their last US concerts, the two girls had decided to spend one extra day in Charlotte before heading back to Columbia.

Being tired and honestly, a little sad at having to go separate ways with the boys, the girls decided that the only thing that could make them feel better was to go find some stores to waste their money in. What did this really mean, Lia vlogging a trip to the mall and buying Kpop stuff even though they just were with their idol soulmate/boyfriends less than 14 hours ago.

“Hi Bunnies!” Lia was holding her small vlogging camera and waving while they were sitting in her car outside the mall. “We are outside the mall, and as boring as that sounds it's fun to us because our local mall has nothing.”

“That’s not true, it has the creepy Aeropostale and once upon a time it had a macaron stand that was amazing,” Lyra chimed in from her spot in the passenger seat. Lia quickly got her in the shot as she spoke.

“So, like I said, nothing,” Both girls laughed at the dig at their local mall, home was home but no one really bragged about living in or around Columbia, SC. “Our goal today, find the Noeasy, or Christmas EveL albums because I want them. And Levanter for Lyra. I also may get a couple Seventeen albums if I can find some I really want.”

The pair was walking into the mall now, and one thing Lyra would never get used to is the looks of other people when they see someone vlogging in public. She couldn’t really blame them, she would also be confused and maybe weirded out if she had seen someone vlogging before Lia started doing social media and streaming as a career.

“Okay, guys, after our first few random stores and a popcorn break, we have made it to the FYE. And here is the selection,” Lia was filming the standard K-pop section the store had, after getting the okay from the manager on duty.

They had a decent amount, some of the more popular albums and with a healthy selection, The largest amount was BTS albums to no one's surprise, the group was huge and it was one of the easiest to find.

The girls were a bit disappointed right off the bat, they found the Noeasy album but none of the others in this section of the store. “Okay, they had this one from Stray Kids, but that was it. Oh, look Ateez! I’d get this one, but we both already have it, so not this trip.” Lia showed a Zero: Fever Part. 1 album, at the beginning of the area.

“Oh, I think Lyra found some more over here,” her assumption was right as she made her way to where Lyra was at a smaller Kpop display, where there were some more Stray Kids albums and the first Seventeen albums they had seen in the store.

“They have Seventeen, I didn’t see any others over yander. Oh! And they have some lightsticks behind the register,” Lyra pointed out both the album and the lightstick from afar.

Honestly, they considered the first one a bit of a bust only coming out with one of the albums they were looking for and a seventeen album that Lia had picked up after all. They even joked a bit about getting the random light stick that was in the store, but neither were fans of Super Junior.

“Okay,” Lyra had taken over the filming for Lia as they had sat back in the car to do an unboxing of the albums Lia purchased. “I’m hoping to get a Han photocard, as always, but I am also looking for Felix to have one of each member. And I know, I know, I could just order everything offline but listen I like the instant gratification that comes with picking them up from the store and our tradition is to open the albums in the car.”

Lia was slowly opening her album and slapped her hand aggressively down over the photo card not to spoil anything for herself or any viewers. With some caution, Lia slowly pulled all of the cards up, still keeping them hidden from view.

“Okay, first one….” She paused for dramatic effect before turning the first card over to reveal a picture of Bang Chan.

“What a cutie, very much love him, but I have like twelve of him,” this was an over-exaggeration, Lia only had three of him but it seemed like she pulled him in every album she got, so every time she got a photo card of him she shouted out some exaggerated number in a fake complaint.

“And we have, A HAN!” Lia was actually jumping in her seat with excitement over the card. “Look, look, look, my little dude. Hahaha, I could just squish him to bits,” she was yelling but in a way that made Lyra cackle from behind the camera.

The girls finished the vlog by going to a much smaller Kpop shop in Charlotte and finding a much better selection. They ended up getting everything they had been searching for and matching SKZ keychains.

Two days later, the LA Vlog was posted and a week after that, the Mall vlog went up. It was considerably shorter than the LA content and honestly, that was fine as Lia was able to do her weekly streams at the moment and was working on the long-form series for when they joined the boys again.

What neither of them expected was Wooyoung calling Lia at 9 AM the following morning.

“Hello?” Lia answered the phone, she had only woken up about 10 minutes before so her voice was still rough from her sleep.

“YAH!” Wooyoung’s shout got even Lyra's attention, who made her way from the kitchen in their apartment to the living room where Lia was.

“What is the matter in here?” Lia just shrugged in response to Lyra's questions, about to ask when Wooyoung started speaking again.

“STRAY KIDS ALBUMS? You traitors, this is the biggest betrayal of my life. You looked at OUR ALBUM, OURS! But you got THREE of theirs, I swear i’m fighting them all the next time I see any of them. I thought you were ATINY. DOES THAT MEAN NOTHING TO YOU?” Wooyoung was still yelling and rapidly switching from English to Korean.

The girls were dying, they were laughing so hard at the man’s over-dramatic ass. To the point where he could hear their laughter over the phone and Lyra thought she was going to pass out because she couldn’t stop laughing at his reactions.

“Don’t laugh, I'm serious. Don’t make me get Hongjoongie-hyung to scold you both,” Wooyoung’s threat didn’t scare either of them in the slightest, it was a bluff. It had to be, there was no way that he would actually scold them for buying another group's album and merch.

“Oh no,” Lyra said, showing her phone to Lia at the text Hongjoong had just sent in the group chat. He was indeed pissed. They all were a little bit, but he was demanding that Lyra call him so that he can also speak to them.

Wooyoung, now smug as hell, hung up his call with Lia saying he would let Hongjoong handle them. He was a little too giddy about the fact that his leader was about to scold them, something the rest of their soulmates had experienced at one time or another.

Was this slight possessiveness hot, absolutely. Were they a little scared of Hongjoong at the moment, very much so.

Lyra, not wanting to make him any more upset, face-timed Hongjoong. It took one ring before the screen began connecting over to him.

Once the connection was stable, his face appeared on the screen and the look he had was nowhere near amused.

“I was under the impression, the two of you were Atiny? I must have been mistaken,” Hongjoong was very calm, it had both girls' full attention on Lyra’s iPhone.

“We are Atiny b-'' Lyra tried to explain but Hongjoong just held up a finger when she began to talk.

“I understand that Stray Kids Make very nice music, Seventeen as well. I have to admit that we are very attached to our Atiny,” Hongjoong paused and pulled back a little, the girls could see several of the other boys sitting near him on the coach he was on. All of them had a similar look on their faces, very serious and stern.

Both girls had several thoughts going through their heads, but the one they had in common was the thought of just how hot they were being jealous.

“We are even more possessive of each other, I think people have picked up on that here and there, but we do not share well at all. Are we not your favorite idols?” Hongjoong asked them in the same calm manner as before.

“We understand that you are protective and you are our favorite boys in this whole world,” Lyra began, answering her soulmate, “We are Ainty, but we also are Stays and Carats and Army. We got so incredibly lucky finding all of you, but it may not have happened if we hadn’t also been fans of those other groups.”

Lyra knew the culture was slightly different for K-stans, but she and everyone she knew who were fans of Kpop loved multiple groups.

“If I hadn't had some very good friends introduce me to a group called GOT7, I never would have spared a second glance to Korean pop. If Lia hadn’t stumbled upon a video of Lee Felix being cute, I never could have convinced her to listen to Ateez. We will always pick you, as our favorite boys, as our choice, believe in you and route for you above all else. I promise that.” Lyra became serious in her last couple of words, they both knew it.

The boys also picked up on the sincerity of what both of the girls were saying by this. Lia, while not speaking, knew that they understood that it went for both of them.

“You’re our soulmates, and you work very hard. We will always support your music and cheer you on.” Lia added with a small smile before continuing, “We will stream and vote for you, that is unless you’re up against Stray Kids, then I might have to pull for the other team.”

All the boys groaned and let out complaints in a mixture of English and Korean, while the girls giggled.

“I’d vote for you over Stray Kids, but if it were GOT7…” Lyra stopped there with a small grin on her face.

“Hey, now we can show you our cute tattoos!” Lia said as she shifted some of the bracelets she always wore on her left wrist to show the small symbol on her wrist, it was like the inside of a Nachimbong with the iconic S at the very bottom of the symbol.

Their faces morphed from understanding to confusion and then Hongjoong made a face, poking his tongue into his cheek.

Lyra from beside her pulled up her pant leg to show her ankle to show a small green bird there.

Then without warning, San pulled the phone from Hongjoong’s grasp and began speaking, “When are you going to get Ateez tattoos? Cover those with us.” He wasn’t joking in the slightest but the girls couldn’t stop laughing at the suggestion. Maybe, just maybe they would think about getting an Ateez tattoo.

They both were shaking their heads in response, they wouldn’t cover up their happy little reminders of their introductions to K-pop. Even as the boys began to make a fuss again, their renewed frustrations, the girls couldn’t take the situation seriously anymore.

Eventually, Hongjoong just hung up the phone and the boys spent the rest of their night pouting.

A/N: We will be back with our next chapter soon! Get ready for another round of goodbyes as the girl got to join the boys in Europe then through to Korea.

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dalamjisung · 1 year

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christmas evel ❁ lee minho

word count: 9846

genre: fluff, angst

pairing: reader x lee minho

description: christmas hasn’t been special for a while. Minho is here to help.

taglist: @banqtlattae @dream-toaster @strxwberrifields @cryoskz @p2q3r4 @lochness-butmakeitsexy @necromancersupreme @pokyloky @minmindreaming @junseokiss @rindomo @tanjiroar @meowtella @wewuuu @teddibug @hugsforjunseo @born5sos @the7thcrow @unloyaljisung @skzooo @jeonstresour @anxiousbobatea @mstarlight @dayawantstosleep @likexaxdaydream @mstarlight @multiwendi @itsyaapollochild @90s-belladonna @seungcheoluwu @hopefulpursepeanutdeputy @nikyc00 @hanjiardilla @ddaengpotate @todorokiskitten @levipie @awksfabstone @hey-i-really-miss-you @pikapikapikaachuu @rindomo @elizabeth11moreno @butterfliesinthenightsky @calumsfringe

[if you want to be added / removed, just drop me a message or leave a comment lovelies!]

Christmas is a time of joy.

Or at least it is supposed to be a time of joy.

The first year that things didn’t quite go as planned was when you were 9. It was the time of glee and happiness and snow and pretty lights and you were yet too young to understand anything beyond the fact that Santa Claus was supposed to come down your chimney and drop off your presents. Instead, what you got was your dad, in all his silent and sneakiness, going downstairs in the middle of the night and missing his little daughter hiding by the couch, with cookie in her hands and tears in her eyes. The second time was a bit after. You had grown up with the years and at 16 you were proud to announce you were just as awkward as you thought you’d be, with the punk rock t-shirt and dark makeup that you swore weren’t a phase, mom, and although it didn’t quite go with your style, you still loved Christmas. Even when you caught your boyfriend locking lips with your neighbor’s older daughter, you still kind of loved Christmas. Even when your mother rolled her eyes at your crying, you still kind of loved Christmas. Even when you had to put on a dress, put on a smile, and then put on a show for your uncle’s annual end-of-the-year dinner party; even then, you still kind of loved Christmas.

What truly broke you, however, was adulthood. You were 22 and about to graduate from college. You could still remember freshman year, walking into the classroom with shaking hands and your anxiety through the roof; but boy, was it worth it. If anyone asked, you remembered the day you two met like it had been yesterday, even though it was four years ago, at that same class you were so scared to go to. It was a lot of firsts and maybe that’s what made him all the more important, the fact that he had been there, by your side, through all of them. Because that’s the kind of person Bang Chan is, constant, reliable, and oh so fucking incredible.

However, despite the four years of repressed feelings for your best friend, college was kind to you. It wasn’t the best years of your life, as some movies might preach, but it was good and decent. You’ve had interesting classes, done your fair share of stupid shit, went to a few parties here and there, and met people that would forever stay in your life… and some that you wished wouldn’t. Sure, meeting Bang Chan had been a blessed moment you’d forever cherish, but with him came a few others and the reactions were mixed. You liked most of them, really; Han Jisung never failed to make you laugh, and Yang Jeongin and Lee Felix were just too precious for anyone to dislike. Kim Seungmin was as loyal of a friend as you’d ever have, and Seo Changbin and Hwang Hyunjin were just the right amount of loud so that your usual silent and lonely apartment turned into a lively ball of light and laughter. But then there was Lee Minho. And you didn’t quite know how you felt about Lee Minho. It wasn’t like he was rude or anything like that, but he was… quiet. Serious. Unfazed. All adjectives that had you uncomfortable, squirming in your seat whenever it was just the two of you, thought that rarely happened as you truly went above and beyond to always have someone else by your side. Lee Minho was… indifferent, and so, towards him, you were too. Though that wasn’t a major issue as you two knew exactly how to co-exist. Some laughter here, some nodding there, and it was like you two were good friends. When that Christmas came, however, it truly felt like you two were friends, because you think that if hadn’t been for him, you would’ve probably lost Bang Chan forever.

It all started a with a text, a simple invitation you were already expecting. Christmas has always been your favorite time of the year, and from how much you talked about it, everyone knew. But the weather forecaster had predicted wrong and the snow storm hit campus a week earlier than expected, meaning no one got to go home and the food was starting to get scarce. That didn’t stop you, though, and with a little begging here and some pleading there, you had enough food and drinks for the eight of you, ending up with everyone in Hyunjin’s room wearing the ugly sweaters you had gotten them as a suprise. Curiously enough, Minho had always been the better drinker out of the entire group, and you, the worst, so by the time all the food was gone and everyone was drunk, you were on a whole new level. Singing from the top of your lungs, taking shots after shots, and hyping yourself up to do something that your gut warned you agains– a few touches here, a giggle there, and everyone was waiting, tension rising as bets started: when would you tell Chan and would you tell him at all? Your crush wasn’t secret, as much as you tried to keep it under wraps, and with Jeongin’s encouragement and Minho’s curious eyes, you were ready to go. With one purposeful step, and one accidental trip, you were all over him.

“…and then– oh shit, Y/N, are you okay?” Chan laughed, softening your fall with his strong arms and you practically swoon. “Hey, you drank too much, didn’t you? I’ve told you so many times to take it easy! Do you need water? Aspirin? Food?” Something about the way he was so ready to give up on his own fun to take care of you had you smiling, lips parting in an almost slow-mo fashion, words forming on the tip of your tongue… only for him to interrupt you again. “Whenever Mia gets drunk she always craves chocolate! Something about sugar helping break down alcohol– do you want some chocolate? I thinks she left some behind last time she slept over!”

When he got up, you practically rolled over, body stiff and frozen. Last time she slept over? Does this mean… does this mean it’s something recurrent?, your mind was working 100 miles per hour, eyes wide as you looked to every single person in that room. Most of them shook their heads and shrugged their shoulders, just as lost and confused as you… most except one. And that one, bless him, looked a little less unfazed than usual, brows furrowed and looking somewhat bothered at the news. “Mia?” Changbin asked, sneaking a look at you to make sure that you were okay. You were not. “Yeah! I’m pretty sure I mentioned her before…?” Bang Chan mumbled, hands quick in turning the room over searching for that chocolate.

“In passing,” Was all that you managed to spit out, throat drying so fast that if it hadn’t been for Minho quickly passing his cup to you, you’d be coughing your lungs up for ages. This was time for one of you guys’ nods and you gave him a thankful one, cheeks red in embarrassment. Even the guy that barely talked to you knew and now you just wanted to roll away and hide under the bed, too aware of your own drunkness to even enjoy the buzz.

“Yeah, well, we’re a bit more official now,” The way he smiled, so wide and unabashed of just how fucking whipped he sounded, made you sick to your stomach in jealousy.

“How official?”

The surprise must’ve been all over your face to warrant one of Lee Minho’s famous eye rolls directed towards you, but his voice was stronger than usual; it was hard and inquisitive. You’ve never seen him like that, and you had to admit, it sent a shiver up your spine. “Ah… you know, exclusive and all… I uh… I’m gonna ask her to be my girlfriend,” He said, brows wiggling and voice barely over a whisper, as if he was telling you all a secret. “I just don’t know when, I mean, we’re all stuck here so maybe soon?”

After that you don’t remember much besides sitting next to Minho and just chugging drink after drink.

Safe to say, the rest of the week went by as slow as possible and Christmas was no longer the jolly moments you insisted they were supposed to be. Everyday, Bang Chan reached out, and everyday, you gave him a new excuse. Oh, sorry, Bang Bang, I have a delayed report due! Extensions don’t last forever! or Can’t today, I promised Changbin I’d go workout with him. You think that you avoiding your best friend became quite obvious when there was nothing else to do besides using Minho as an escape. “Ah, I really can’t… yeah, I know, it’s been a crazy week… no, Chan, I swear all is good– no, no, no, I just,” You just what? What would be the grand lie that you’d make your friends tell Chan to cover your scared ass? “I just promised to meet Minho for coffee and–“

“Minho?!” Now, if there was one thing you knew about Bang Chan was that he was like a sniffer dog for lies. The man could call out a fake story with his eyes closed and it was honestly starting to make you sweat, nervous eyes glancing around as if Chan was right in front of you and you couldn’t look at him. “My Minho? My friend Minho?”

“Uh… yeah, why?”

“What do you mean, why? You avoid him like the plague! You even told me once that he made you uncomfortable!”

“Well… we bonded.”

“Bonded? When?!” It was getting worse by the moment; his high-pitched voice making you so nervous that you couldn’t help but start hyperventilating and biting your nails. The way you kept looking around made you look like a paranoid woman, but at that point, you’d do anything to hang up the phone. “At the Christmas party,” You mumbled, kicking a rock with half a mind to come up with something better than that. “Minho–“

“Me?”

The way your head whipped to the side was comical; pain shot up and down your left side and a silent scream left your mouth as your body tensed up, scared to death from his sudden appearance, but fuck, if that wasn’t a miracle come true, you don’t know what was. “You! Hi! I was waiting for you for like, forever! Sorry Chan, Minho is here, gotta go, bye bye!”

Hearing Lee Minho chuckle wasn’t something that happened often– or ever, to be honest– but it happened then and you lost your composure, mouth hanging open and phone slipping off your hand with a swift thwack to the ground. The cracking noise is what gets you back into your body and with a gasp, you look at the ground. “Oh fuck!”

“Ah… Chan, huh?” Minho raised a brow, smirking as he leaned down and winced at your phone. “It’s broken, sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Oh believe me, you didn’t, you just saved my ass,” This was getting tiring. Lying to your best friend was getting tiring, running around to avoid him was getting tiring, bringing your friends down with you was getting tiring. All you wanted was to just enjoy, to be honest. You wanted to enjoy your college years and you wanted to enjoy your parties and dinners and bars, and you wanted to enjoy the fucking holidays, for fucking once! Was that too much to ask?

“Hm, I’ve heard,” Looking at you with his head tilted, he suddenly didn’t look so scary– his usual serious face had a glow to it and his curious eyes were now filled with playful mischief. “You’ve been recruiting everyone and I was starting to feel left out. So, tell me, what am I supposed to tell Chan?”

You probably looked like an idiot, standing there with your mouth hanging open. “I uh… I mean, I don’t– you don’t have to… if you don’t want to! I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or–“

“Did I say I was uncomfortable?”

“…No.”

“Then come on,” He shrugged, and for a second, you understand why you were always so squirmy around him; why your heart always beat so fast. Lee Minho was the most honest and direct-to-the-point person you had ever met, and for some reason that made you nervous. He was like a little box of surprises and you never quite knew what you were about to get, and that made you sweaty and anxious and… and somehow, excited.

“I just said we were going to get coffee,” You sighed, grabbing your phone from his hand and wincing at the cracked screen. You really couldn’t afford to change it but it was too late now. “It’s not big deal and I’ll owe you one! A coffee even, the most overpriced one, from that little nice cafe by the dance studios!”

“Oh damn, you’re serious about this,” He said, nodding to himself before shrugging. “Sure. I’m down for some free coffee. Are you free now?”

“Now?”

“Mhm, now. We are all stuck here for the holidays thanks to the snow storm and this is one of the rare moments of break we’ve been getting. Plus, it wouldn’t be a lie if we actually do it, so… coffee?”

“Fuck yes, coffee.”

It was that afternoon that things changed. Or at least that things changed a little bit.

It was the afternoon you found out Minho had 3 cats that he loved more than life, Soonie, Doongi, and Dori.

It was the afternoon that you found out he hates having his personal space invaded but that he loved hugs.

It was the afternoon that you found out he’s an only child, that he danced since middle school, that he is ambidextrous. It was the afternoon you found out Minho can’t swim, that he likes anime and that his favorite anime is the same as yours, that strawberry ice cream is his favorite. That was the afternoon you found out a lot of things about Lee Minho; and it was also the afternoon that became an evening that became night. By the time he was walking you back to your dorm, he was laughing, truly laughing– head thrown back and smile so wide that his eyes turned into little moons. His cheeks were red and his breathing turned into a visible puff of air with each word, and for some reason, you couldn’t help but stare with this look of amazement in your face, this pure adoration that only grew stronger as time passed. Enough so that by the time you two reached your door, the snow had picked up again and you couldn’t help but hum in worry, looking at him with a frown.

“Not to be creepy or anything, but it’s starting up again and I don’t know how I feel about letting you face the 20-minute walk back to the boys dorms with a storm going on,” Your voice is weak and unsure, but the firm nod of his head has your shoulders relaxing again.

“I was about to ask if it was okay for me to wait it out with you,” Minho smiled thankfully and you thought you could get used to that, the radiant shine etched on his face whenever he did smile. “I’ll text the guys so they’re not worried. Thanks, Y/N.”

That night– because he ended up spending the night– you two talked through a couple of movies and frozen pizzas, laughing at stupid, nostalgic stories that always started with remember that time when and then something absolutely ridiculous that had been magnified to seem worse in your mind. “Oh! Oh, remember that time, during Han’s birthday party, the one we all went to the cabin upstate? Yeah, that one– remember that time when we were all going for a swim on the lake, but no one thought that it was going to be froze and– stop laughing! You pushed me inside! Or on top! And it hurt!”

“No, no, no, no! I didn’t push you! I swear I didn’t push you!” Minho shrieked, laughing in disbelief with wide eyes and frenzied gestures. “No, I got pushed!”

“No fucking way!”

“Way!” By then, there were tears rolling down his cheeks from how hard he was laughing, clutching his stomach with every gulp of air. “I was joking around with Felix, right behind you, and we were just doing dumb shit, and all I remember was him pushing me, and me pushing you! It was an accident, I swear!”

It was almost like every you two were compensating time lost, righting so many wrongs that by the time the sun came up again, you two were still talking.

Things changed for real, though, during New Year’s Eve. The storm was starting to move north and finally allowed for more than a few hours of clarity, and that night, to celebrate the turn of the year for the few that gave up going home altogether, Jeongin and Felix invited everyone to count down the seconds through a digital alarm that probably hadn’t been used in months. Safe to say you were in, and that everyone was as surprised as Chan when you arrived with Minho in tow, giggling at something he had said. As soon as he stepped inside, his face did that thing; eyes low, smile gone, face blank of any emotion. This time, however, it didn’t make you cower in fear, but laugh in amazement. “How the hell do you do this?” You asked, elbowing him playfully as you grabbed some beers from the cooler on top of the bed.

“Do what?”

“This whole I-Don’t-Care-About-Anything switch,” For effect, you tried to imitate him, laughing half-way thought it. “It’s like magic!”

“Ah,” Minho smiled a little at that, scratching the back os his neck like he did whenever he was uncomfortable or cornered– you’ve learned that much about him, at least. “I’m just not a big fan of crowded places. Parties are cool and all, and I have fun, but it’s just… overwhelming.”

Overwhelming. It’s overwhelming. Never, in a million years, would you have thought that Lee Minho gets overwhelmed in crowded parties, but there you were, looking at him with that understanding expression on your face and feeling like absolute shit. All this time that you were uncomfortable near him, chances were he was uncomfortable, too. “I see. Super fair, it does get insanely loud.” Almost as if to prove a point, Changbin screamed the most guttural noise you’ve ever heard, downing two shots with Han. “Yeah, just like that.”

“Well, in my experience, if you can’t beat them,” And he almost fooled you, with the long sigh and the roll of his eyes, but his hands hiding behind his back, revealing one shot each, couple with the mischievous glint in his eyes gives him away. “Join ‘em.”

And join them you did. Minho has you so distracted with drinks and games that you barely see Chan holding his new girl the way you’d always wished he would hold you– so carefully and lovingly. So gentle, with his hands on her waist, and his eyes focused on her and only her. So… Bang Chan. The night went on like that, with you stealing glances but never really focusing enough to feel the incoming, inevitable heartbreak of seeing the man you’ve been in love with for the past three years with the woman he’s been in love with for, well, god knows how long. But then the clock hits 11:59PM and they turn the alarm clock, the room turning into absolute chaos as people ran around, looking for a single friend, a single person, a single kiss. No one wanted to turn the year alone and yet, seeing Chan pulling Mia closely, both smiling at each other, wishing all the best of things for the year to come, living in their own world for the few seconds to come, you’ve never felt more alone in your life. No, not alone– you were lonely.

“10, 9–“

“Hey, Y/N, do you have–“ Han’s voice was faint and almost dull, your brain too overwhelmed to process anything happening around you. Overwhelmed… is this how he feels?

“8, 7-“

“Y/N, are you okay?” This was Minho. Somehow, his voice cut through the fog deeper than the others, but you still didn’t answer. “Y/N?”

“6, 5, 4,” The countdown didn’t help. It was like a pressure that built up on your chest, getting heavier and heavier. Your nimble hands moved around, looking for something, anything, to hold onto, to keep your stable, to fucking help you breathe.

“3, 2, 1,”

Surprisingly enough, you’re the one that pulled him in for a kiss. Later, when he asked you what the fuck happened, laughing and in disbelief, you just shrugged and mumbled a you were right there. But in that moment, with his soft lips moving against yours, and his strong hands pulling you closer, and his chuckle giving you goosebumps… at that moment, he wasn’t just ‘right there’. He wasn’t just an easy option, or a friendly embrace, or a good friend. At that moment he was Lee Minho, and he was the guy that had your heart speeding to the point of having to pull away and fucking breathe. He was the guy that kissed you back like you were dying to be kissed back for ages, and nothing could take that away from him. Not even when he smiled, looking all smug and smooth, and muttered, “Merry Christmas.”

What?

“That’s it, guys, Y/N kissed Minho broken!” Seungmin screamed and the room went into mayhem. Han and Hyunjin hugged each other like they had seen the impossible; Jeongin ran around screaming until he fell on top of Felix, who stood by the corner, pointing and frozen; even Chan, that was too busy looking into Mia’s eyes as if he would find the universe there, gasped and stared at them in what Changbin described as horror. Unfortunately, not even that was able to break the moment you were having with the guy you avoided until less than 72 hours ago. Nothing could break your eyes away from Minho’s, not when his shone with such glee and surprise.

“Minho, it’s New Years,” You whispered back, chuckling breathlessly.

“So what? You like Christmas better,” Was all he said, and your smile fell, turning into an expression of pure and absolute shock. Your mouth hanging open was an obvious sign, and all it took was one eye roll from his side to have you mumbling unintelligible words like an idiot. “Yeah, yeah, why are you so surprised? You talk about it all the time, and, like, you start listening to Christmas music in freaking November! Who does that, Y/N?”

“I do, but how do you… know…” Your voice trailed off to give space for his laughter, so hearty and melodic and you couldn’t believe you never heard it before– truly heard it; but now that you have, in your drunken and impulsive state, you really believed that life would never be the same ever again. So much so, that at that moment, you didn’t really have the heart to tell him that you didn’t like Christmas all that much anymore, after the endless disappointments so tightly attached to the holiday, so you just smiled, letting him pull you towards your friends and begin the new year more confused than ever.

For someone that didn’t feel anything but discomfort around Lee Minho, you sure were feeling a whole lot more now that you knew what was like having those lips on yours.

Three Years Later

Christmas is not a time of joy.

And now, at 25, you don’t really believe it was ever supposed to be.

At lest for anyone that works in publishing. For publishers, Christmas is hell. You soon adapted to your role quite seemingly, huffing and puffing at just the mention of Christmas time as you run around the office, arms heavy with manuscripts and trying to make it to the elevator in time. Today is the last day to get your report in to the Editor in Chief for a microscopic chance to have your mystery manuscript chosen for publishing. You had it assigned to you a month ago, which is not enough time to read a three-hundred-something-pages story while marking up mistakes and edits, and taking margin notes for further changes and improvements, but alas, there you are, rushing to the boss’ office like it is a goddamned race. Which means you are late. You are so fucking late that even running won’t cut it, but you refuse to admit defeat, slamming into Mrs. Kwan’s door and catapulting yourself into her office just as she closes her laptop.

“Ms. Y/L/N, how good it is to see you just as I finish for the day,” Her sarcasm is as obvious as the purposeful long sigh that she let out, moving to walk right past you. “Give it to me.”

Without saying anything, mainly because you don’t have enough air in your lungs to do anything besides wheeze and give her the papers, nodding in thankfulness and moving aside to let her leave for the next two weeks. Once she is completely out of sight and, hopefully, out of mind, you allow yourself to crumble, body slipping down the wall until you’re sitting and gasping for air. “Oh fuck, I did it. I fucking did it, I wasn’t late, I did it, I did it, I–“ And the familiar melodic ping of your phone’s calendar reminded you that you are, in fact, very late. Later than ever. Couldn’t be more late. And that it’s time to run again. “Fuck.”

Getting home is not an easy feat, and that’s partially your fault– did you really have to chose an apartment right at central? When he argued for a more isolated house, what did you say? No, no, no, that’s too far away from work! I want to be able to walk to the office, you know? Enjoy the fresh air in the morning! Fresh air?! Are you kidding me? What fucking fresh air?! You haven’t smelled fresh air since you two got back from your cousin’s wedding in the country side, and even then, you were too busy with your face buried in that fucking manuscript to even enjoy the so wanted fresh air. And now, running through crowds of tourists and avoiding getting run over by cabs whenever you cross the road a bit too freely, you sure as hell can’t smell the fresh air; you can’t even breathe. If you were late, which you already are, that will make it the fourth time just this month. The first was when you were late for date night, but he was forgiving enough to let it go for the humble price of one kiss. Second and third times were family gatherings that, to be honest, you had no interest in going, but promised him you’d be there anyways; those times, he wasn’t so forgiving. This is becoming a habit, was what he said last time, voice cold and distant like he usually got whenever he was uncomfortable and it tore you apart so badly that, those nights, you slept on the couch; which in turn, made everything even worse. You didn’t sleep and neither did he, and somehow you end up in your best friend’s house, begging for help with tears in your eyes.

Fourth time is now, and you can’t, for the life of you, ruin you two. You can’t let it escalate and you can’t late it take over what is supposed to be ‘the best night ever’, his words, not yours. Just as you cross the road, though, looking like a madwoman, someone grabs your arm. It’s firm enough to have you breaking immediately, yet gentle enough to be careful in not twisting it weird or hurting your elbow. “Hey! What the fuck, man, who the–“ Bless those dancer skills, because you swing your bag back so hard that, if it hand’t been for years of him training his reflects, date night would have ended up in the hospital. “Oh my god!”

“So you stood me up and you try to kill me. Wow, Y/N, and here I was thinking you truly loved me.”

“What are you doing here?!”

“Me?!What are you doing here? You’re late and– oof!” The way you throw yourself into his arms, in the middle of the sidewalk while people cuss for having to walk around you two, says enough. It says you’re sorry, but that you are also relieved to see him; he doesn’t seem angry, and you’re late though not unforgivably so, and now, you are officially off duty.

To say this year had been hard on you is an understatement. Ever since starting this job, it was like you had nothing more important than making sure you’d be able to keep it. Probation had never really bothered you before; it was a normal part of every job you’ve worked, and it was completely logical– it was aa time for them to see if you were a good fit with the team and if you were as capable and excited as you had been during interviews. However, this was actually the first job you’ve ever had that you truly cared about, and after the long and arduous road of getting there, you would do anything–anything– to make sure you’d succeed. Unfortunately, that meant working late hours and taking way too many extra tasks, and just like a never ending cycle, the office turned into home and home turned into the office. You wouldn’t leave the apartment without your laptop or your work phone nor would you stop thinking about deadlines, and consequently, you were always tired, irritable, and with your mind somewhere else. Which then made Minho tired and irritable. Which then had you two at an impasse and you hated being at an impasse with your boyfriend, because no matter who the fuck was winning, you always felt like a loser.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I swear I didn’t mean to but I got the manuscript in and now I have two weeks off and we can go get dinner–“

“I already did,” He sighed, smiling tightly at you and patting you back slowly. That’s when you know that you fucked up. Ever since you two had gotten together, he had been the most supportive and patient person you’ve ever met. He never complained, not even when he had all the right to; he never went to bed alone or angry as, in his words, those were the few moments he would spend with you that you weren’t working; and above all, he never, ever, ate without you. Back in the first year of you two, right after that fateful New Years that started it all, life was stressful– graduation, moving to the city, finding jobs, handling bills, and so on and so forth. It was all new and scary and you both had to work odd jobs to get by, and that made spending time together really, really hard. Minho was a dance instructor in the mornings and you were a bartender at night, so finding that free time to sit down together and actually have a meal and catch-up was rare at best. He made it work though, even if he was fifteen minutes late for work or even if he had to stay awake until the sun was starting to shine; no matter what, Lee Minho would make the time for you, and whenever you remembered that, the bitter taste of failure and the hurt of disappointment came back. He made so many sacrifices and you couldn’t even make it to one date in time?

“Minho–“

“Yeah, I know, I know,” He sighs, shaking his head and putting on a forced smile. “The manuscript and all– I’m glad you go it all over with and all, but I had to put a deposit on the restaurant and I was starving, so–“ “A deposit?” Frowning, you look up to try and get a hint of what is going on inside his head. “Baby, why would you make a deposit?”

“Are you serious?” Apparently that was not the right thing to say– he looks upset. “Because I thought you’d make it, Y/N! You promised you would so why wouldn’t I believe you?! And it’s Christmas’ Eve, on top of that, of course I’d have to make a deposit to hold a table on one of the most famous restaurants around–“

“Most famous… was it–?”

“Yeah, it was,” His voice was so low that you barely hear it, his shaking head and tone of disappointment driving an imaginary knife down your chest. “You’ve been wanting to go there for so long and I finally saved enough money to get a table.”

“Why? Why would you do that? You always said that it was just overpriced deli food!”

“Because,” Minho shrugged, sighing as he pulled you to the side clearly frustrated, moving away from curious passerby’s that stared weirdly at you two. “It’s Christmas!”

“You hate Christmas!” The way your voice comes out all high-pitched and shrieking really makes it sound like you are getting defensive, but you can’t help it; you already feel like a pice of shit for standing him up, and then for ruining his surprise, and then for not being able to keep a promise. It’s like he’s so perfect and never-faltering when all you can do is trip through the walk of life and hope you’ll land on both your feet. “You hate Christmas, you say it all the time, and–“

“But you love it!”

You never really imagined that the first time your boyfriend would scream at you would be in public, right on Christmas’ Eve. To be honest, you never imaged him screaming eat you at all, but alas, here you two are, his eyes shinning with… are those tears? This is too much– this is all too much and you can’t think right, not when he’s crying right in front of you, not when he looks so hurt and tired, and so you do the worst thing you could have ever done. “I fucking hate Christmas!”

“…What? What on Earth are you talking about?” And you need to get you two out of there, people are too nosy for you to feel comfortable talking about this and you’re slowly getting closer and closer to fucking crumbling down. “You’ve loved Christmas ever since I’ve known you. It’s all you talk about when the end of the year comes around!”

“Fuck– come here,” You pull him after you, hailing a taxi down and pushing him inside. The ride home shouldn’t take more than fifteen minutes, considering the traffic, and you don’t know if you should talk about it now or later. Preferably, you’d be doing this from the comfort of your home where you two could let your emotions out and have the fight that had been, admittedly, building up for so long; but when have things ever been ‘preferable’ for you?

“What– no, I don’t think this is a good idea, Y/N, I just… I wanna take a walk, okay? Sir, please, drop me off at the next light and–“

“Drop you off?!” The hurt that runs through you is too immense to ignore, and, this time, you simply let the tears fall. There is no hiding anymore, no pretending things are fine, no pushing and pulling. This time, you really messed up. “You’re just leaving? Without talking about this?”

“Talking? You want to talk about talking? Then why didn’t we talk about how I bend backwards every fucking year to give you this picture perfect Christmas only because you didn’t talk to me before and told me that, mysteriously, you now hate the holidays! Or how about we talk about how you’ve been miserably late for every fucking date, and event, and family gathering, and anything that requires you doing anything but your fucking job, to the point that I don’t even know if you want to be there at all!” You try to cut him off and speak, but he stops you. “I mean… do you? Cause this is… fuck, Y/N, this is too much! I feel… I feel like we’re back in fucking college and you’re avoiding me all over again.”

“Minho–“

“And then next fucking thing you know, you’re talking about Chan again and he’s doing something oh so great again that changes your life or something, like saving fucking Christmas, and–“

“Minho–“

“Cause we all know, Bang Chan is fucking god and–“

“Chan is the reason I hate Christmas!” You shriek, barely holding together with your hands shaking as you try to hold onto something, anything, almost ripping the leather of the backseat. His inquisitive eyes are enough to have you blabbing away. “He had Mia and I really loved him and I was all alone and then on New Years he kissed her and I kissed–“

“Me?” The silence that follows is deafening, but it is also the loudest answer you could have given him. And that’s when you realize you fucked up. Yet again. “So what you’re telling me is that I was, what? Second choice? Available?”

“We barely knew each other back then!”

“I– I can’t do this,” He whispered, hand covering his mouth as it opens and closes repeatedly, trying to form a sentence that just won’t come out. “I thought I could, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t–“

It’s almost like you triggered something in him that finally breaks the damn. Minho is a great boyfriend, and some might argue that he is even a better friend, but he despite his amazing qualities, he’s not the most expressive person you’ve ever met. He prefers quietude and gestures then words and spoken emotion. Though it bothers you a little, you never once doubted his feelings for you– not until then. The absolute rage in his eyes and the disappointment in his voice make you feel so small and as soon as the taxi slows to a stop, you feel your heart speeding up. This is it; he’s about to walk out on you and after this, future is not all that certain. After this, you won’t get home to him or with him; you won’t chuckle as he makes small talk with the security guard outside the building, you won’t get a warm cup of peppermint tea as you get ready for bed, you won’t get to read him your favorite passages of your favorite manuscripts– after this, Minho is gone. For a few minutes, a few hours, days, or even weeks. Shit, he might be fine forever, but you won’t ever know until it happens and it’s so hard to breathe or think or speak or even fucking move, so all you can do is stare with wide wide and mouth hanging open as he reaches for the handle and opens the door.

But that isn’t the worst part.

The worst part is when right after he steps out, he looks back, eyes tired and red and teary, and he doesn’t even say anything. No goodbye or see you later or don’t wait up. Just a defeated shake of his head and a way to harsh slam of the the door. And just like that New Year’s Eve three years, you’re feeling all alone and lonely again, except this time, you can’t turn around and run into your future’s arms and kiss his lips and look into the universe in his eyes. This time, you’ve absolutely ruined your future. And your Christmas, yet again.

“Ma’am, should I–“

“Just, just keep going please,” It’s all you manage, soullessly meeting his gaze through the rearview mirror. He offers you a smile and gets you back in the apartment in record time, very obviously uncomfortable in your pain. When he slows down to a stop in front of your house, he doesn’t even let you pay, just giving you that pitiful look you loathe and waving you off.

Entering the apartment alone just feels wrong– usually, Minho would be right behind you, either making some joke, or pushing you forward, or eagerly kissing your neck. Something about him always making a point of having his hands on you has you smiling through the hiccups, tears blurring your vision to the point of not being able to see your way to the bedroom. Though you know the way by heart, avoiding the center table and the couch and turning right onto the hallway and down to the room, you miss the fact that Minho had, once again, left his shoes in middle of the room, randomly enough for you to step on it and trip. It when you’re on the floor, pathetically wailing your sorrows and rubbing you knees, that your mind takes you back the last night. And the night before; and the night before; and the one before that, and pretty much every night of the past two months, when you’d come home late from work and trip on your boyfriend’s shoes, ending up in a very similar position with a worried Minho stumbling from the bed, blinking sleep away and leaning over you. He’d caress your knee– somehow you always fell on your knees– while mumbling the sweetest of things, arms gently wrapping around your tired body to carry you to bed and kiss the pain away. Except today, he’s not there to help you. He’s not there to tell you you’re okay or that he’s got you or that everything is fine, because today, nothing is fine. For today to be anything resembling fine, you’d need a miracle.

And maybe that’s the magic of Christmas. Maybe that is why you once saw the lights and the glee and the singing as a sign of hope and cheerfulness. Because somehow, through some sort of powerful and all forgiving force, miracles do happen. They happen in the most subtle and gentle of ways, too– through a smile from a loved one, or a hug from a long lost friend, or a familiar memory from years past. Or even, in your case, the soft padding of shoeless feet on the wooden floor, stopping just inches away from you with a tired sigh.

“What are you doing on the floor?”

His voice alone is the miracle you’ve been begging for– just hearing it has you crying harder than before. At this point, you can’t even make sense of what you’re trying to say, just rolling to the side, the one away from him, and hiding your face in your hands. “I-I tripped on your s-shoes.”

“Did you just get back?!” Now he sounds confused, and you finally look at him, confused a bit yourself. “Y/N, it’s been… it’s been like three hours since we were in that taxi.”

“Three hours?” You just repeat, and when you move to sit up, that’s when the reality of how much time past hits you. Your shoulder is aching to the point of having you silently gasping, back acting up next, with dull pains everywhere, and, worst of all, your head. Crying always gave you a headache, and before you could say anything, Minho grabbed your water from your bedside table and extended it to you.

“You always gets dehydrated when you cry, drink this,” He mumbled, and that’s the first time you look into his eyes, the red and puffiness of it all tugging at your heartstrings in a way that makes you whimper. “And yes, three hours. Y/N, were you laying there all this time?”

“I… I guess,” You sniffle, slowly drinking the water. “I tripped and I didn’t feel like getting up.”

The moment he sits right next to you is the moment you hold your breath. The time line that you’re living in feels delayed somehow, and the defeated morale that floats around you two has you looking at him with nothing but sorry and regret. “Don’t… Don’t look at me like that,” Minho sighed, tilting his head to the side while keeping your broken gaze. “That’s not fair, Y/N.”

“What is not fair?” You whisper, hugging your legs to your chest. Usually, you’d crawl to his lap and you two would talk things out until both end up either in bed or on the couch. There is no in between, with you and Minho, and there has never been– they had been all in since the beginning.

“It’s not fair that I can’t get fucking angry at you!” His frustration is palpable and it makes you wince within yourself. You’re not scared of Minho– you don’t think you could ever be afraid of him– but you are definitely afraid of the impact he has on you. You’re afraid his words will cut through your heart like a knife, afraid that he’s done with your bullshit, afraid he’s right in being angry at you… and he is. He is right in being pissed, because you are 100% sure that if the roles were reversed, you’d be absolutely livid. “You… I fucking love you, and I’ve been giving you everything I have, and I need to know Y/N– is it not enough? Am I doing something wrong? Because I’m trying! I’m trying so hard to make you love me like you love Chan, but I don’t think I can keep this up much longer cause it hurts so bad.”

And this is the moment that you think your entire life flashes before your eyes. People say that this usually happens when you’re about to die, when the white light flashes and everything feels hot and cold at the same time– well, people are right. Seeing Minho like that, slowly crumbling down to tears, hands shaking and face scrunching as the hiccups leaving his body wrecked him whole, so loud and harsh… that’s when you realize you’re dying. You’re slowly withering inside, the more you don’t move towards him, letting your heartbreak at the sight because that’s what you think you deserve. You deserve this suffering you caused him, deserve to feel it like he does, and so you stay put, paralyzed and at a loss. What does one say in a situation like this? You two have been together though thick and thin, even when you weren’t quite friends and you were healing from heartbreak; even when you weren’t quite dating and he was worried about his dad’s health; even when you weren’t quite living together and the commute was wearing you both down… even then, you two were together. You were a team. So why is it that now, when you feel more alone than you’ve ever felt, you can’t seem to go to him? To go to your partner, your safety, your team, and ask for his support? It’s simple really, and when it downs on you it’s like you’re veep pushed forward to his arms, grabbing his hands in such a desperate way that you’re afraid you might have scratched him by accident. “I’m wrong.”

“No shit, Y/N,” Minho hiccuped, trying to pull his hands away only have you, for the first time in ever, outdo him in matters of strength and bring him even closer to the point that with a simple swipe of your thumb you cleaned his beautiful cheeks free from tears. “What are you doing?”

“I am so wrong, oh my god,” You whisper, more to yourself than him. “But so are you, my love. What is this Bang Chan nonsense, Lee Minho? Where is this coming from?”

“Where do you think?” His sniffles are sad but you can’t help but smile at just how cute he looks. Usually, your boyfriend, blank and cynical, refuses to show emotion. He’d sit and nod and participate, but rarely ever would he do much more. His smiles, precious and bright, are reserved for those special to him, much like you and the other boys. You probably failed to notice, but his smile to Chan has been dimming year by year; his best friend suddenly causing him so much pain, and it’s like a war in his heart that you’ve failed to settle. Instead, you’ve just made it worse and worse, and suddenly his personal battle turned into a psychological warfare that he will never win. Not if you don’t step up to the fucking challenge and be the girlfriend he deserves to have you be. “You literally told me you only kissed me that New Year’s night because he kissed some other girl!”

“That was three years ago!” You shriek, eyes going wide. “As if you’ve been in love with me since then…”

“N-Not since the-then, but… but pretty clo-close,” His hiccups, so violent in nature, pushes his body further into your arms and you sit there, embracing him as best as you can, even if your arms can’t quite go around his wide shoulders.

“Minho, I need you to listen to me, okay?” You mumble, head lowering so that your lips brush against the shell of his ear. You don’t stop the caresses, the hands smoothing his pain away, the gentle smiles, the careful words. As much as he likes to pretend he has no emotions, Minho is a sucker for physical contact, relying on it to convey the words he couldn’t bring himself to speak. “I love you. That’s the one thing you should keep in mind while I talk– I love you, not Chan. Deal? Good. Now, listen: I need you to understand that yes, years ago, when we were still in college, I liked Bang Chan. Back then, I think I described it as loving him, but baby, that’s not even closed… I was young, and naive, and I had never experienced love have I have now– with you, and all we’ve built, all we are– and I get that what I said hurts, I really do, but Minho you’re it for me. You are my endgame, and even if you leave me, you’ll still be my endgame because no one can come after you. No one compares, after or before.”

“What are you even talking about, me leaving you and–“ Those words rattle him out of your arms, but you quickly pull him back in.

“Shhh,” You hush him, heart beating a thousand miles an hour. You would be lying if you said his panic didn’t spark some hope in you, fighting off the smile that wants to come out and grace him with some light. “Listen to me. There’s just you, Lee Minho, and there has only been you ever since we got together. Before you, was just crushes and likes and weird flirting. Love is just you. Do you understand that? I need you to understand that before moving to the next part of this whole speech, baby, I really do.”

It takes him a minute or two to respond, breathing still shallow and irregular, but with time he manages to recompose himself, nodding before nuzzling his face on your neck. This is the usual routine whenever your boyfriend has overwhelming breakdowns like these– he lets it all out… and then seeks comfort in you, nuzzling and cuddling closer. It’s something about the warmth of your body and the tightness of your arms around him; he explained it once but you can’t quite recall it now, when his sniffles can be felt on your skin and his shaking figure tries to curl itself smaller in your loving arms. “I understand… I’m sorry, I under–“

“No apologizing coming from you, nuh-uh,” Pecking his lips as a way to shut him up, you pet his hair, cradling his face to your neck. “You have nothing to apologize for… me, on the other hand, I have a lot of apologies to do still, so let me start by saying I’ll quit my job.”

That has him sitting up in no time, accidentally head butting your chin to the point of you screaming in pain. “Ouch!”

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, Y/N!” And just like that, his tears are gone. Above everything else, Minho is selfless. When it comes to you a bit more than others, but he cares nonetheless. His expert fingers press and probe around your chin and you laugh, shaking your head as you held his hands down again. “I’m so sorry, baby, I didn’t mean to get you like that but you caught me by surprise. What do you mean? Why on Earth would you quit?!”

“Okay, I might have worded it wrong, I’m not quitting, I’m relocating,” You explain in a soft voice, the decision you made a second ago suddenly seeming to set and sure that you believe this might have been your unconscious plan all along. “I’m moving jobs. I can’t do this anymore, Minho– not to me, not to you, definitely not to us. I was an idiot, baby, an absolute idiot. We are a team… and I wasn’t much of a team player these past year or so. And I won’t blame it on my job because it was all me, but god, I’m so fucking sorry, my love. You’re my entire world and I just… I don’t know what happened, I felt like I needed to do better, you know? Like, like, like I needed to be the person you’ve always thought I was, this sensational woman you talk about all the time. I wanted to prove to you that I am ready to move into adultship with you, whatever the hell that is,” Sighing, you push your hair back, frustratedly tugging on the roots. “I wanted to prove to you that I’m ready for our next step, but I ended up moving there alone while you moved somewhere alone and when I realized it was too late. And I guess all I have to do now is beg– I will beg, Minho, I really will!– for your forgiveness. So please, can you forgive me? Can you find it in your big, big heart to forgive me?”

Your artery voice tugs on his heartstrings, you can see it happening when he gives you that understanding, head-tilted-to-the-side look that makes you smile in defeat. “Of course I forgive you, Y/N. I-I… I don’t think I can ever not forgive you,” His sigh tells you that he’s starting to get tired, and if you’re honest, so are you. The floor hurts your whole body, but it’s all worth it– for him, anything is worth it. “And you don’t have to leave your job, don’t be insane. You live for publishing, as much as you love to complain about it.”

“Nope,” Squeezing his cheeks in your hand, you kiss his now pouted lips again. “I live for us. I love my job, but it’s not my sole reason to continue moving forward. We are. We are the reason I work… so we can afford that house we dream of, and we can visit our families more often, and we can have those kids we always talk about, you know? All us. Always us. So yes, I’m moving jobs. I’ve gotten countless of offers through the years and I might have not taken any, but it’s not too late. I have contacts and people I can call, and… and I can grow somewhere with normal working hours and–”

“Breathe.”

He soon gets you to bed, carrying you like a princess to the comfort of you guys’ mattress and laying you down only so he can lay next to you, taking his turn in being the bigger spoon. “I need you to breathe, Y/N. We’re okay… we are good, everything okay, it will all work out, okay? How about, for now, we go brush our teeth, put some PJs on, and just cuddle until we fall asleep?” “So you’re not leaving me?”

“Oh, shut about this leaving thing, no one is leaving and that’s the end of this discussion,” He grumbled, but you feel how his heart races on your back. “Or… or else it’d be a bit awkward… you know, considering the shinny ring on my pocket and the amount of money I spent on this thing. So yeah, I’d rather if we talked about staying instead. Like… like you staying with me. Forever.”

It’s the half-casual-half-nervous voice tone that has you freezing, an audible gasp leaving your lips at the sudden request. No– the sudden proposal. “Did you just– Are you sure, I mean, we just had… a massive fight, and– MINHO STOP LAUGHING!”

“I would, but I’m so tired and dehydrated that I think I’m going insane,” He whines, pulling you even closer and burying his face on your neck. “So… yes or no?”

“Minho, I can’t just accept a marriage proposal without even looking at you!”

“So you don’t want to marry me…”

“I never said that, of course I want to!”

“Then it’s a yes.”

“No– you can’t-“

“It’s a yes or a no!”

“Minho–“

“Come on Y/N, marry me.”

And those are the words that do it for you. The ones that bring tears to your eyes as the reality of your situation finally hits. “Are you serious?” You whisper, voice breaking with the weight of the tension in the room.

“Definitely more serious than you were when you said you’d quit your job.”

“I was so serious!”

“Well, so am I!”

“Fine!”

The moment his voice dies down, no more echoes bouncing off of the walls and no more ruffles of bodies moving in the bed, is when you finally turn around, the impulse to just grab his swollen face and kiss him dumb too hard to resist. “Fine,” You say one last time, smiling like a fool.

But if it’s one last time or the entire night that you repeat those words– that’s not important. What is important is that this time, with his arms around you and his lips brushing against your with each and every promise of happiness and future, is the one time that your words truly matter. “Fine,” You mumbled, eyes shutting close from sleepiness, but the grin in your lips never fading. “A thousand times fine.”

And if this is how Minho makes Christmas special to you again, you think you don’t mind the holidays all that much, after all.

----------------------------------------------

I was supposed to post that on Christmas... last year LOL hope you enjoy it lovelies! been a while but lovely to be back writing on Tumblr!

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skzrinasworld · 4 months

Text

song credits ♡

MIXTAPE (2018)

hellevator (songwriter)

beware (songwriter)

spread my wings (songwriter, producer)

4419 (songwriter, producer)

I AM NOT (2018)

district 9 (songwriter)

mirror (songwriter, producer)

awaken (songwriter)

grow up (songwriter, producer)

3rd eye (songwriter, producer)

I AM WHO (2018)

my pace (songwriter)

voices (songwriter, producer)

insomnia (songwriter, producer)

m.i.a. (songwriter)

awkward silence (songwriter, producer)

I AM YOU (2018)

i am you (songwriter, producer)

my side (songwriter)

hero's soup (songwriter, producer)

get cool (songwriter)

0325 (songwriter)

CLÉ 1 : MIROH (2019)

miroh (songwriter)

victory song (songwriter, producer)

maze of memories (songwriter, producer)

boxer (songwriter)

chronosaurus (songwriter)

19 (songwriter, producer)

CLÉ 2 : YELLOW WOOD (2019)

road not taken (songwriter)

mixtape#1 (songwriter)

mixtape#2 (songwriter, producer)

mixtape#3 (songwriter, producer)

mixtape#4 (songwriter)

CLÉ : LEVANTER (2019)

double knot (songwriter)

levanter (songwriter, producer)

booster (songwriter)

astronaut (songwriter, producer)

sunshine (songwriter, producer)

you can stay (songwriter)

NEVERENDING STORY (OST) (2019)

(songwriter)

MIXTAPE : GONE DAYS (2019)

(songwriter, producer)

GO生 (2020)

god’s menu (songwriter)

easy (songwriter)

another day (songwriter, producer)

airplane (songwriter, producer)

phobia (songwriter)

blueprint (songwriter)

haven (songwriter, producer)

IN LIFE (2020)

back door (songwriter)

b me (songwriter, producer)

we go (songwriter, producer)

MIXTAPE : OH (2021)

(songwriter)

NOEASY (2021)

cheese (songwriter, producer)

thunderous (songwriter)

the view (songwriter)

sorry, i love you (songwriter, producer)

silent cry (songwriter, producer)

secret secret (songwriter)

star lost (songwriter)

red lights (songwriter, producer)

CHRISTMAS EVEL (2021)

(songwriter, producer)

ODDINARY (2022)

venom (songwriter)

maniac (songwriter)

charmer (songwriter, producer)

lonely st. (songwriter, producer)

waiting for us (songwriter, producer)

CIRCUS (JAPANESE ALBUM ) (2022)

circus (songwriter)

fairytale (songwriter)

your eyes (songwriter)

MIXTAPE : TIME OUT (2022)

(songwriter, producer)

MAXIDENT (2022)

case 143 (songwriter, producer)

chill (songwriter, producer)

give me your tmi (songwriter)

3racha (songwriter, producer)

SKZ-REPLAY (2022)

my tears richochet (songwriter, producer)

blueming (songwriter, producer)

invu (songwriter, produer)

miss you (songwriter, producer)

crying in the club (songwriter, producer)

wish you back (songwriter)

until i found you (songwriter, producer)

5-STAR (2023)

hall of fame (songwriter, producer)

s-class (songwriter)

item (songwriter, producer)

topline (songwriter)

super bowl (songwriter)

collision (songwriter, producer)

youtiful (songwriter)

SOCIAL PATH (JAPANESE SINGLE) (2023)

(songwriter, producer)

ROCK-STAR (2023)

megaverse (songwriter)

LALALALA (songwriter, producer)

blind spot (songwriter, producer)

cover me (songwriter)

leave (songwriter, producer)

songs produced for other groups !

ENHYPEN

BORDER : CARNIVAL (2021)

intro : the invitation (producer)

drunk-dazed (songwriter, producer)

mixed up (songwriter, producer)

DIMENSION : DILEMMA (2021)

tamed-dashed (songwriter, producer)

go big or go home (songwriter, producer)

attention, please! (songwriter)

MANIFESTO : DAY 1 (2022)

future perfect (pass the mic) (songwriter, producer)

paradoxxx invasion (songwriter, producer)

shout out (producer)

DARK BLOOD (2023)

fate (producer)

bite me (songwriter, producer)

sacrifice (eat me up) (songwriter, producer)

CRIMINAL LOVE (2023)

(songwriter, producer)

MARK FROM NCT

GOLDEN HOUR (2023)

(co-writer, producer)

masterlist

#skz oc #skz 9th member #kpop oc #skz #stray kids 9th member #stray kids oc

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badwithten · 1 year

Photo

Blood on the Table | CHRISTMAS EVEL - STRAY KIDS ADVENT CALENDAR

PAIRING Lee Know x fem!reader

GENRE horror + angst

WORD COUNT 2.2k

WARNINGS death, drugging, guns

FEATURING Boss!Taeyong

SYNOPSIS You held Christmas close to your heart, wanting to spend the holiday time around those who you love. Unfortunately this year, your boss insists on spending Christmas eve at his house for a company dinner. With Lee Know at your side, you head inside the strange house. At first, your anxiety was based on the awkward small talk required to get through the night. But you soon realise your life might be on the line if you don't play along with your boss's games

MASTERLIST

Your eyes were fixated on the mirror in front of you, analysing every inch of you, everything had to be perfect. Your outfit was in no way revealing, but you knew you'd have eyes all over you. This was your one chance to impress your boss and it wouldn't be easy. The promotion you had been working towards since you were a simple intern was just within your reach.

Work has been going well, too well recently. But you weren't gonna argue with the gods above that allowed you to be as successful as you were. Promotion after promotion led you to where you were now, and it all came down to this one event. A Christmas dinner at your boss's house. You were a workaholic and a romantic, so when you were offered a rose that would put you in a position of power, you were going to grab the thorns and run for it. It was never stated that how this meal turns out would have any impact on your career, but it was highly implied that you needed to make a good impact.

“You look beautiful” A small voice from the door of your bathroom takes you away from your thoughts, leaning against the frame is Lee Know. He has his white shirt still unbuttoned, revealing the tight undershirt he hears. His blazer is loose around his frame but the comparison with the tightness from his other clothing works.

“I know, I’m just stressed.'' You look over to the mirror once again, self-doubt full in your eyes. You didn't even believe yourself when you spoke, your voice laced with worry.

“Do you?” He steps over to you, arms lacing around your middle as his head rests on your shoulder. You relax into his touch, allowing him to rub some of your worries away. “Because I don’t think you do”

“Yes Min, I promise” You turn in his arms, allowing him to step back a bit to look at you. Gently moving his hand, he holds it against your face before guiding it close to his. He takes pride in kissing you, taking his time to make sure it conveys the love he feels for you. You're lovesick, so drunk from his touch that when he pulls away you follow. Leaning into his chest to hide yourself. Being so intimate and close to your lover has more pros than you can count. But it also has its con, one being you can't hide what you're feeling.

“You're still worried aren't you?” You nod into his chest, so anxious about the event you have to leave. His hands come to your shoulders, prying you away to once again see your face. “Y/N I’m going to be right there with you ok? We got this”

“I know” Your voice is still doubtful, and you know he can tell. But the time restraint does not allow him to sit there for hours calming you down, although he would rather spend the night doing that than some dinner with people he doesn't know nor cares to get to know.

“Come on” He kisses your forehead, a lot softer than what he did with your lips. “We have to finish getting ready.”

You stare at yourself for much longer than needed, nothing is changing, yet your nerves still don't allow you to move but hearing Lee Know groan as he sits on the bed (presumably to pull on his shoes) takes you out of your thoughts once more.

“Babe?” You call out, waiting patiently for a response.

“Yes!”

“Are you sure this dress is ok for tonight?”

“Oh my god, just get your shoes on already!”

“Are you sure this is the house?” Minho has the car halfway up the driveway, unsure whether to continue towards the castle in front of you.

Castle is a hyperbole, but it's not far off. The large house is made up of old and odd architecture. A large roundabout at the driveway, and a beautiful garden in the middle. But even the blooming flowers could not distract from the building itself. Large rounded roofs, and balconies coming from every large window. You could see the house was not of this decade, but nothing of it looked dated. It was kept up to current-day standards, no paint chipped or weatherboards worn. But one thing you had never seen in a modern house was the tinted windows, who tints their windows at their house? The wooden walls were taller than any you had seen, painted a ghostly white while the shackling on the roof was a baby blue. The blue and white paint of the wood melted into the sky, truly making it a place close to heaven.

“Yeah” You're blown away, not only is this an impressive house you're even lucky to look up, it only ups your anxiety. “This is the address”

Lee Know pulls the car around the driveway, stepping out to greet a valet. You can barely process your surroundings, shaking as you step out to meet him around the car. Before you know it, the young man is driving off to park your car among the other vehicles you recognize as your coworkers. Hand in hand, the two of you make your way to the large wooden door and Lee Know takes the first move to ring the doorbell. Almost immediately the door pulls open and your boss is present.

“Y/N!” His large round eyes and sharp bone structure are just as shocking as ever, you didn't see him every day at the office and you often forgot about his strange beauty. He takes your hands, pulling you in to kiss your cheeks. “And this must be Mr L/N?”

His attention turns to Lee Know, whose uncomfortableness with your boss's actions isn't very well hidden. “Lee Minho'' But he pushes it away, putting his hand out for a shake. Awkwardness builds throughout their short interaction and you get second-hand embarrassment at the “man off” between the two.

“Mr Lee, this is my partner Lee Minho” You gesture towards your boyfriend, he seems shocked at the word choice to describe your relationship but says nothing. “And Minho this is my boss, Mr Lee”

“Just Taeyong” He laughs, giving your arm a rub before leading the two of you inside. You walk side by side with Mr Lee, Taeyong Lee, while Lee Know trails behind you, rolling his eyes and pulling a face at your boss.

Sitting at the table allowed you to see all the other guests that were invited. Some you knew from work, some were from other branches and some were just other peoples 'partners but all of them were your competitors for your promotion. The panic of the situation fully sitting in when you needed to be your most calm, yet as if he had read your mind, a warm hand finds yours under the table. A squeeze and smile from your boyfriend calm you down. Once the table was filled, Taeyong joined at the head of the table. A glass of red wine is in his hand as he holds it for a toast.

“My dear wife, fellow workers and partners, I thank you for taking time out of your schedule to join me for tonight” His eyes meet almost everyone around the table. Talking to everyone individually despite speaking to the table. “I understand that you are all very busy around this time so I appreciate your presence very much. Tonight is special for not only me and the company, but the opportunity it offers all of you”

You hear a scoff from your side and you kick Lee Know's foot from under the table. You knew his speech would be long and with Mr Grumpy at your side, you were more focused on keeping him in line than listening to the rambling of your boss. This was going to be a long night.

After a large meal, presumably not made by Mr Lee, as well as a few glasses of wine. You were feeling more comfortable in your environment. Lee Know had found himself talking to some other poor boyfriend dragged out for the night. You stood by the large fireplace warming the room, your eyes fixated on the many photos and ornaments over the mantelpiece. It's not long before you're disturbed, by a similar thin and pale hand reaching for the same photo frame you are looking at.

“Do you remember this day?” Mr Lee holds the photo up for the both of you to look at. It's him outside of the office building. He's shaking the hand of a man much older than him, a man you don't recognize but he's talking to you as if you guys are old friends. It makes you uncomfortable but you play along.

“I don’t know actually” You squint, pretending to look closer as if you haven't been staring at this photo for the last half hour. You really don't know who he is. “Must've been off that day”

“Hmm lucky you, he's a dick head” He laughs, placing the photo back up on top of the fire. “Are you enjoying tonight Y/N?”

“Oh yes, you have a beautiful home” Like when you first arrived he places a hand on your arm, leading you through the small crowd of people towards the dining table which is now full of desserts and cocktails. Lee Know is already present at the table and you're grateful he leads you to your safety net. “Thank you for having us”

“No, thank you for coming” He grabs two mugs from the table before scooping up hot chocolate from the large pot placed in the centre. He passes you each a mug and you look down at the brown liquid steaming up at you. “Now I insist you try this, it's my mother's recipe but my darling wife makes it just as well. Hmm maybe even better actually”

You silently take a mouthful of the hot liquid, enjoying the chocolate as it warms your insides. But Minho on the other hand doesn’t play along, placing the mug back in front of your boss. “Sorry man, I'm the sober driver tonight” He gives Mr Lee a pat on the shoulder and a toothless smile.

“Well hang on a minute” Mr Lee becomes defensive at your boyfriend's accusations. “I invite you into my home and you're gonna turn down a drink from me? Where's your etiquette?” He laughs but Lee Know stays stoned face, you gulp down your drink, trying not to make eye contact.

“It’s nothing personal, but as I said, I gotta make sure this one gets home safe” He tries to bring the situation back down but you see a fire build in Taeyongs eyes that you have never seen before. You go to speak, to defend your lover but you feel heavy. Pulling out a seat, you rest yourself down, only having the energy to listen to the words being argued back and forth. But even then you can barely understand what they're even arguing about.

“There's no alcohol, I promise” He smiles, eyes still hiding something dark despite his wide grin. It's off-putting. Usually, his strange looks intrigue you, instead, it just feels uncanny in this situation. Your head barely stays afloat as your mind sinks to the bottom of your thoughts. Where are you?

“I don't want to drink it. End of story” Minho finally turns his attention to you and his face drops, colour draining from him as fast as it had for you. “Y/N?” His voice is full of panic, he knows something is wrong.

The room spins and suddenly Lee Know is kneeling by your side, pushing your head back to try to get your attention. But you can’t focus on anything. Everything is moving too fast and your head is hurting. He looks back up to where Taeyong is standing over the two of you. “What the fuck was in that hot chocolate?”

At this point, all of the room has its attention on the three of you. It clearly upset the man above you.

“Lower your voice Lee Minho” He speaks with such authority that you see Minho jump. But he soon comes back to it, opening his mouth to defend the two of you. To take you to safety. To end this hellish feeling taking over your body.

But before you hear any words leave his mouth a loud bang rings out and all you see is red. You don’t know where it's from or what it was. Warmth leaks out onto your body, a nice contrast to the numbness taking over your limbs. It is a sharp pain that sits in your chest. Have you been shot? Is this over?

The fear of death is enough for you to sober up for a second, and you finally take in the scenario. It wasn't you that was shot. It was him. Lee Know. His head is blasted open, splattered all over you as his body lays limp on your lap.

You can’t move. You can't react. You feel it build up inside of you. A whirlpool of anger and hurt and fear. It burns you from the inside out but whatever is in your system is more powerful as you sit there paralysed. Finally, your eyes meet the crazed man standing above you. In his hand, he waves a gun.

“Anyone else wants to object?” He speaks to the room full of people, all of them just as frozen as you, watching his every move. “Good, let's start the games then shall we?”

#k-labels #stray kids #skz #lee know #lee minho #minho #stray kids x reader #stray kids x y/n #skz x reader #skz x y/n #lee know x reader #lee know x y/n #lee minho x reader #lee minho x y/n #minho x reader #minho x y/n

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