#ohhhhhh my bf

[its-not-sof]

feels like

mark smut + fluff (virgin!reader)

It wasn’t your fault you didn’t check the weather forecast that morning before you left for work.

As you stared up at the dark, angry sky, you contemplated the easiest way to get into your apartment building unscathed by the pelting rain. Instead of making a run for it, you sulked in your car, letting out a frustrated sigh.

You suddenly felt your phone buzz, and the face of your newly acquired boyfriend lit up the screen.

“Mark?” You answered his call, a hint of desperation evident in your voice.

“Are you okay, Y/N? Usually you’re back by now, so I already let myself in.”

You smiled warmly. It had only been a few months since you’d started officially seeing each other, but you felt so drawn to him immediately. He made you feel loved, safe and so happy. It was almost like a spare copy of your apartment key had just spontaneously made itself and appeared in your hands for you to give to him last week.

And boy, were you glad for it right now.

“Mark, can you do me a huge favor? I need you to grab my umbrella and bring it out to the parking lot. I’m going to get so soaked on my way in.”

Mark laughed.

“Of course, just give me a second, okay?”

Within moments, your boyfriend came into view, holding your travel umbrella precariously over his head in the windy storm. You steeled your nerves and quickly threw open your car door, taking off into a run towards him. Mark smiled and laughed, amused at your urgency.

“It’s just a little rain, Y/N,” he joked, calling out to you before you landed in his waiting arms.

Even your desperate sprint wasn’t enough to save you from getting drenched, your dripping clothes and skin clinging to your boyfriend’s jacket. When he stood for a moment without moving, you pushed against his chest.

“What are you waiting for, get inside!” You urged, huddling as close as possible to him.

Mark laughed again and pulled you close, teasingly hovering the umbrella just out of your reach for a moment before returning it over your head.

———

“If I catch a cold, it’s going to be your fault,” you huffed, ringing out your soaked hair in the kitchen sink. “From now on, I’m revoking your ‘holding the umbrella’ privileges.”

Mark smiled, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind and pressing a kiss to your cheek,

“You know I’ll be here to take care of you,” he mumbled. “No promises on changing my umbrella technique, though.”

You playfully swatted at his arms, laughing as he quickly tickled at your sides before releasing you to resume your work.

It had taken you a moment to remember that your clothes were completely soaked through. The drenched garments clung to your figure, and your white shirt became particularly see-through.

You turned to face Mark, finding him staring at you intently. You met his gaze and found the most adorable blush dust across his cheeks.

“Oh, don’t mind me— just enjoying the view,” he murmured.

Now it was your turn to blush. You had never undressed in front of Mark before. In fact, there were a lot of things you’d never done before. But the way he looked at you and the way the flirtatious comment rolled so easily off his tongue made you want to try.

Mark sensed something off in your reaction, and immediately backpedaled.

“You should get changed, love. You’re really going to get sick if you keep those on,” he said, a comforting smile gracing his features.

You felt a feeling of boldness bubble up inside your chest. You sucked in a quiet breath.

“Do you… want to help me take these off?” You whispered, letting your eyes meet his and impart your desires where your words lacked. Mark’s eyes widened in return, eyebrows raised at your sudden boldness.

“I mean, yes… yes please,” he purred. His tone shifted, only slightly to one of gentle concern. “Are you sure?”

You held his gaze, without faltering.

“Yes,” you breathed, pulling him in for a passionate kiss. “God, yes.”

Mark instantly pulled you impossibly closer, tangling his fingers in your wet hair, kissing you back with a fervent desire. His hands trailed down your back, brushing against your spine. You weren’t sure if your shivers were because of the cold, or the way his skin made contact with your bare back.

You pulled away only slightly, looking him in the eyes again.

“Can we do this in my room? I just— I’ve never—“ you sighed. “I’ve never done this before,” you admitted.

Mark smiled sweetly, reaching a hand up to cup your cheek.

“Oh, Y/N,” He pressed another kiss to your lips. “Yes,”he took your hand, allowing you to lead him down the hallway.

You pushed open your door, turning to face him before crashing against his lips again. You ran your fingers through his hair, hoping your enthusiasm would make up for your lack of experience.

Mark took the lead, taking your bottom lip between his teeth and pulling gently before reaching for your waist again.

His nimble fingers slipped underneath your soaked shirt, sliding it up slowly. You pulled away for a moment to help him rid you of the wet garment. Mark’s eyes fell to your lace bra, perfectly showcasing your soft breasts. He let out a gentle puff of air before he reached for them gently.

“Tell me if you need me to slow down or stop, okay?” He whispered sincerely, gingerly caressing your skin. You nodded and placed your hands on top of his, guiding them to your chest.

Mark’s hands cupped your breasts, slowly massaging them and quickly finding your sensitive peaks through the lace. You let out a soft sigh as he began to tease them between his fingers.

“Mark…” you sighed, feeling a warmth begin to form in your core. You pulled him closer to you, and in turn, closer to your bed. He took the hint and pressed your body down into the mattress.

He reached behind your back to unhook the lace garment, and his eyes widened as it fell from your shoulders.

“Y/N… god, you’re so beautiful…” he whispered, thickly.

“Mark, please, I need you so bad,” you responded, placing his hands back on your body.

Mark didn’t waste any more time as he let his fingers stroke your soft skin and attached his lips to your exposed neck. You leaned back and threaded your fingers through his hair, keeping him in place. He sucked hard enough to bruise, soothing your raw skin with the tip of his tongue before continuing down your chest.

He stopped at your perked nipples, looking up at you before taking one into his mouth, sucking and licking at it until he heard you moan.

“Y/N, that is the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard,” he purred. Your face flushed, and you refused to meet his gaze.

“I hope I get to hear that again tonight,” he smiled as he began to lavish the other breast with the same attention.

You felt a slickness begin to blossom between your legs, and suddenly your wet jeans became even more uncomfortable than they were before.

“Please, get these clothes off me,” you begged, scratching lightly at his shoulders.

Mark complied, carefully unzipping your jeans and sliding them down your legs. His fingers brushed against your thighs, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

He took a moment to take in your beauty— topless, flushed, soaked panties, and pert nipples. He’d never been harder in his life, he thought.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered.

You felt your heartbeat race as more of your clothes came off, almost entirely exposing yourself to him. You reached forward and slipped your hands underneath his hoodie, urging him to take it off.

He complied, swiftly removing the garment over his head. You immediately pulled him closer, running your hands over his exposed chest and shoulders.

“You’re beautiful too, you know,” you whispered, giggling softly. Mark smiled into your shoulder, leaving kisses there before pulling back to look into your eyes.

“Y/N, I want you to tell me if anything is uncomfortable, or if I’m going too fast, okay? Promise me?”

You nodded, kissing him gently. Mark smiled, and carefully prompted you to spread your legs.

“Tell me if it’s too much,” he hummed, softly tracing the outline of your folds through your thin, soaked panties. You shifted your hips slightly, swallowing hard as he found your clit and began to circle it.

Your breathing began to quicken as he continued with his agonizing pace, softly teasing you.

“Mark, please,” you whined, grinding down into his touch. Mark laughed softly.

“Okay, okay,” he cooed. His fingers hooked into the waistband of your panties and slowly slid them down your thighs, exposing your dripping center.

You felt the urge to close your legs, suddenly embarrassed at him staring so intently at your most intimate area. Mark’s hands gently coaxed your thighs back open.

“Don’t be shy, love,” he murmured.

You shifted again, relaxing your hips and allowing your legs to fall open for him.

“That’s it,” he whispered, soothingly tracing your skin. He began to lower himself down onto the mattress until his lips were inches away from your core.

“Can I?” He requested, soft breaths fanning across your flaring heat.

You nodded quickly, sucking in a shallow breath.

Mark smirked and slowly licked a stripe up your folds.

“A-ah!” You sighed, squirming already at his touch.

Mark eased your thighs over his shoulders and held you in place while he gave a gentle suck on your most sensitive peak.

“M-Mark, oh god,” you jolted at the unfamiliar sensation, but immediately found yourself longing for more.

“Let me know if it’s too much, okay?” He soothed, diving back in with gentle fervor.

You threw your head back onto the pillows as he began to suck and lick mercilessly at your heat, fingers massaging your inner thighs.

A gasp escaped your lips as his tongue began to flicker quickly across your clit, your hips bucking off the mattress. Mark’s hands held you in place, not allowing you to shy away from the pleasure.

Your breaths became ragged and heaving in between long, languid moans. You could almost feel Mark smiling as he kissed and hummed against your sensitive center.

“Mark, I-I’m getting close,” you whispered, locking your legs around his shoulders. You slid you eyes closed and focused on the feeling.

His lips closed around your sensitive peak once more, sucking hard and circling it with the tip of his tongue. The sensations became too much as his mouth pushed you over the edge for the first time.

“M-Mark!” You cried, feeling him tease you through your orgasm as your walls fluttered around his tongue.

Your chest heaved with uneven breaths as you came down from your high. You opened your eyes and saw Mark’s smiling face looking up at you from between your legs, his lips glistening with your release.

“Felt good?” He murmured, gently stroking your thighs. You giggled softly.

“God, yes,” you ran your fingers through his slightly disheveled hair, tucking a few strands behind his ear. “But, I want to make you feel good too, Mark,” you whispered, scratching lightly at his scalp.

Mark’s eyes were gentle yet full of lust. He knew exactly what you wanted from him.

“Are you sure, Y/N? I don’t want to hurt you.”

You looked into his eyes and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips.

“Yes. I’ve never been more sure of anything,” you promised.

Mark released you from his hold and crawled back up to kiss your neck.

“Okay, love,” he murmured. “We’ll take it slow, okay?”

You nodded, pulling him close and tracing your fingers across his bare back. You felt him grind his clothed hips gently across your core, and you felt him.

“Just do it, Mark,” you begged, palming him through his sweatpants.

He hissed as he felt your touch, and his reaction sent another wave of arousal through you.

You quickly freed his length from his clothes, and you tried to hide your intimidated reaction as best you could. He was bigger than you expected.

Mark sensed your hesitation immediately.

“We don’t have to do this now,” he murmured, gently stoking your cheek. You shook your head.

“No, I want to. Please?” You asked, looking up at him with confident eyes. Mark leaned in to kiss you slowly.

“Okay. Please stop me if it hurts, Y/N,” he said. “Promise?”

You caught his lips in another quick kiss.

“Promise.”

Mark nodded and carefully returned to your core, swiping his fingers along your folds before inserting one slowly.

You winced slightly at the unfamiliar sensation but quickly relaxed in his gentle hold.

“You okay?” He asked, gently making a ‘come hither’ motion with his index finger inside your walls.

You gasped, nodding quickly, adjusting to the feeling before he added another finger.

“God, you’re so wet, Y/N…” Mark leaned in close to whisper in your ear as his fingers sped up. You could hear a the faint sound of your arousal coating his digits.

“I’m ready, Mark, I promise,” you huffed, your breathing growing heavy again.

Mark placed a kiss behind your ear and trailed down your neck before removing his hand. A string of your wetness clung to his fingers, and he immediately dragged them across your swollen clit. You squirmed, waiting for him to give you what you really wanted.

“Mark…” you whined, shifting your hips impatiently.

“Alright, pretty girl. Just relax for me, okay?” He murmured, spreading your legs a bit wider and positioning himself at your entrance.

You braced yourself as you felt his tip against your folds. You unconsciously tensed a bit, preparing for the impact.

“Relax,” Mark whispered soothingly, massaging the backs of your thighs. “I got you, okay?”

You nodded and released the tension in your hips.

“Good girl,” Mark purred, feeling your muscles relax.

You hissed at the quick, dull pain as he began to push into you. You couldn’t help the quiet whimper that left your lips as you felt him stretch your entrance for the first time.

“Are you okay? Do you need me to stop?” He asked, running his fingers through your hair and looking deeply into your eyes.

You shook your head, trying to ignore the tears prickling your vision. Blinking them away, you met his gaze again.

Mark brushed his thumb across your flushed cheek, catching the tears that fell.

“Just a little bit more, you’re doing so well for me, Y/N. Relax and breathe, okay?”

You smiled at him, urging him to continue. He carefully pushed into you again, causing you to let out another whimper.

“I got you, I’m right here, okay?” Mark soothingly stroked your thigh and cupped your cheek, talking you through his every move.

You soon felt his shallow thrusts beginning to bring a slow wave of pleasure to your core, and he slipped a hand down to gently circle your bundle of nerves. You bit your lip and cling to him tightly, your nails digging into his bare shoulders.

“Y/N, you feel so good,” he groaned, losing himself in your tight hold. “Talk to me. What do you need, love?”

Your mouth fell open as he sped up slightly, moving at a still slow but sensual pace.

“I-It feels good,” you cried. “Please, Mark, don’t stop.”

Mark continued his thrusts, holding you close and whispering soft praises in your ear. It wasn’t long until you felt another high approaching.

“I-I’m gonna— I think I’m—“

You moaned softly as your walls fluttered around his length, and simultaneously bringing him to climax along with it.

“Y/N!” Mark cried, pulling out quickly and releasing across your bare stomach.

Mark’s shoulders heaved as he came down from his own high, taking in the sight of you before him. You looked at him and began to laugh.

“Mark… I can’t believe—“ you smiled and pulled him in for a passionate kiss.

Mark beamed at you, his eyes full of love.

“You did so well,” he murmured, stroking your cheek and brushing a few stray hairs away from your face. “My beautiful girl. I’m so lucky to love you.”

You giggled at his words, feeling like you were floating on air. Mark got out of the bed and quickly returned with a warm, wet towel, gently cleaning you up.

You couldn’t deny the dull pain that still ached in your core. Mark saw you wince as you shifted your hips slightly, and reached out to massage your inner thighs.

“I’m sorry, Y/N, did it hurt too bad?” He asked, a bit panicked.

You shook your head.

“No, no— it’s not your fault.”

Mark refused to let go of your gaze, not convinced.

“Let me run you a bath, okay? Your hair is still wet from the rain, we should get cleaned up anyway,” he insisted, carefully removing the wet towel.

You nodded. He was right.

“That sounds amazing,” you sighed, smiling at him.

Mark leaned in for another kiss before heading to the bathroom.

You watched him walk away, then pause and turn to look at you before reaching the bedroom door.

“Hey. I love you.”

You smiled, almost giddy.

“Hey. I love you too.”

[enluv]

HE DID THIS FOR ME HE DID THIS FOR LATINE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE!! JAY FOR LATINAS !!!

[chryzuree]

luc is such a good comphet boyfriend

[antonsgf]

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ bf!anton pt. 2 ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

bye this is so long overdue oops !! part one is here !!

bf!anton likes to send you little texts throughout the day just to update you on what he's doing while on schedules and he most definitely miss you :(

he would also send tik toks and .5 pics of his hyungs just for funisies and you should send some back !!!

speaking of tik toks, yall would spend hours creating some !! your drafts are filled with 100s of silly little videos

especially trendy couple vids like this one :))

bf!anton would definitely bring you around to hang out with his hyungs and of course they would tease him !!

but don't worry because you would definitely defend your man if needed be !!

like imagine one night yall are having a group movie night and you're all snuggled up next to tonny and giving him a smooch on the cheek

next thing you know eunseok is like "ugh get a room :P"

without a beat your response would be like "damn bro i would be mad too if i didn't have someone kissing up on me like get a gf :P"

everyone is like ":O ohhhhhh shit!" "you finally met your match hyung :)" lmao you and eunseok would go toe to toe !!

you gets down and you dont play about your tonny !! it's all jokes though so no worries :))

aside from that anton would feel so much pride and happiness from the sight of you getting along with his hyungs esp sohee !! but like sohee was lowkey his wingman tho LMAOOO

tonny is an unconfirmed taurus venus, which in my delulu head means one of his favorite things to do with you is taking a nap or cuddling which leads to said naps !!

he just give top tier cuddler like !! his arms look so warm and welcoming adafklhfjhafjhd

imagine yall cuddling up all nice and peaceful !! you're wearing one of his t-shirts and he's holding you all warm and snug throughout the night against his chest ahhh !! i would simply just die right then and there fr !!

the next morning you wake up with his arms still around you and you're like stuck physically because his arms are locked in !!

it's always the same scenario of you two being like

"ant we gotta get up :3" "ahh just five more minutes baby :3"

his sleepy self would refuse to let go because being bed with you is like paradise !! and he doesn't want it to end...unless...

"i'll make your special yogurt parfait you like for breakfast :)"

he would relunctantly let you go but only because how could he turn down his special greek yogurt parfait that he is more than capable of making himself made by the love of his life ???

and it's not even all that !! you literally found a recipe on tiktok and made it for him one day !! now he texts you every now and then wishing you were around to make it !!

"babe it's literally four ingredients ??" "but it's not the same when you don't make it :(("

food would be another part of his love language because we all know how much our boy loves his snacks !!

and how could you deny your boyfriend from a treat that's handmade from you ?? like make it make sense ??

thanks for reading and waiting lmaooo !! might make make this a series but no promises !!

feel free to send me asks or let me know what yall think :3

♡ kimmia ♡

[h-harleybaby]

HEY POOK!!

I found your page this morning and OH MAH LAWRD 😻 WOOF WOOF WOOF, ya know? 😔

Take your time with this request, because I don’t want you to get stressed..

But remember those Eric and Kyle oneshots? Where you are Kyle’s bf but they have their way with you? 😳 (wowzers)

WHAT ABOUT THAT WITH ERIC AND BUTTERS??? LIKE PLS ERICS GF AND BUTTERS JUST SO HAPPENS TO- AHH😩

keep me in ur thoughts 😏

- 🍒

OHHHHHH???????

I’VE BEEN LIKE- TRYING TO WRITE ANOTHER KYLE AND CARTMAN ONE BUT I SUCK AT WRITING KYLE- Cartman and Butters on the other hand???? OOOOOH MAMA (says this as I write whatever comes to mind while I’m at lunch and feeling really embarrassed about it)!! Also I’m like half sure you meant Butters x Cartmans gf reader right??? Sorry if I’m wronggg

Also dw I always think about my anons /hj I love y’all sm

Anyways, thanks to @tiniedemon and @hand-writxen for the ideas while writing. I was stuck on this for the LONGEST time and felt super bad about it. As per usual, I’M NOT SHIPPING THEM IN ANY WAY!!

HAS NSFW CONTENT

Butters x Cartmans gf reader

• Let’s be honest, Cartmans a bit of an voyeur- so when Butters came up to him real apologetic about having a lil crush on his gf it gave him the best idea

• That’s how it started, all of y’all expected it to be a one and done thing BUT NOPE

• But who tf knew that Butters was super fucking horny??? Not you-

• Anyways, the both of them take turns on you ALL THE TIME! It’s mainly because they don’t hate each other so that makes it a hell of a lot easier

• Y’all ever heard of double penetration??? YEAH THATS THEM- JUST HEAR ME OUT ON IT

• They’re both kinda impatient (difference is although Butters might get antsy he can wait, Cartman refuses to) so like, double penetration does happen quite a bit

• Butters has like, no chill tho. He’s super obvious about his crush on you and how he feels about you, dudes ALL over you and it’s kinda cute ngl. It annoys Cartman tho so it usually ends in him making Butters watch y’all fuck or something and not letting him touch you to remind him who’s gf you are

• Butters gets so whiny too, he’s desperate to touch you and he’d do literally anything Cartman tells him just for the chance of a bj or something

• Cartmans a sadist so he usually makes Butters get on his knees and beg or something. That part’s not even sexual he just likes feeling the power 👀

• Tbh Butters is a really sweet, passionate guy so most of the time he puts your pleasure before his own. In his eyes, you come first so ofc he’s gonna make you cum first even if he has to edge himself

• But omg those few times where he really lets go and he’s really rough and uses you 😩

• Anyways so enough of that, ngl Cartman really likes watching Butters eat you out. Sometimes after he jerks off to y’all he has post nut clarity and thinks he’s a lil creepy but that’s like, immediately gone because he realizes he doesn’t care enough

• Honestly, I can see Butters fucking you but Cartman being completely in control the entire time

• He says he wants Butters to edge you? It’s done. He wants you guys to overstim yourselves, DONE

• He loves seeing Butters edge you and himself. Definitely likes seeing the tears of frustration and taunting you about it, calling you his crybaby

• Butters definitely whimpers while edging himself and gets really caught up in how good you feel, hehe Cartman edges himself a couple times too while y’all do 🤭

• Hear me out, he’s super mean about cumming. Literally will not let either of you cum until he does from you sucking him off

• I dunno, orgasm denial is just a huge thing here ya know? Like in his eyes (at the moment) y’all are just fuck toys entertaining him 💅

• Cartman is such a control freak but it’s honestly kinda hot to both of y’all. Butters is definitely more on the sub side a lot of the time so it works out for you guys

• NOW YOU GOTTA HEAR ME OUT AGAIN ‼️ the both of them like watching you get yourself off using toys. Also mutual masturbation ngl. They jerk each other off while watching you <33

• Like I said, orgasm denial is a huge thing so Cartman probably makes you get off on some sort of vibrator but doesn’t let you cum for the longest time because he wants you to beg. He starts rubbing off on Butters at some point and he starts doing similar things

• Would not be surprised if Cartman makes you get off on his shoe (def a new pair he only uses for that purpose because ew, germs) while the two jerk each other off

• EHEHEHE imagine Cartman makes you fuck yourself on a dildo and watches because he says you’re not ready or even worth him and Butters dicks yet

• Definitely says you have to work for it and likes watching you do it. I swear no amount of preparation prepares you for the both of them at the same time. FUCKING ANIMALS

• Anyways, Butters is probably secretly into pegging. Just hear me out ok???

• He really really wants you to peg him while Cartman fucks you (in Cas’ words, a lil train)

• Omg so like, jerking him off while you peg him and Cartman just jerking off the whole time because damn who knew you looked super hot while pegging someone

• I feel like Cartman really likes seeing his cum on your face and at the end of y’all’s… session the two of them usually jerk off on your face and tits

• Butters definitely thinks you look super pretty with cum on you while Cartman kinda sees it as a hot degrading thing

• Sometimes this kinda stuff happens in public where they’re both horny and they literally fight over who gets a blowjob from you because they don’t have much time or privacy

• Anyways, both literally love a good creampie so you best believe that both of them do creampie you. CONSTANTLY

• Round after round man, Cartman just really likes seeing it drip out of you. Probably smacks your pussy (somewhat lightly) just to giggle as you whimper before fingering it back in

• All that is just an instant boner for both of them. THEY’RE INSATIABLE I TELL YOU, INSATIABLE

• Before y’all go out sometimes they both cum in your underwear and make you wear it out after rubbing it in, this definitely isn’t something I saw on an NSFW twitter acc that made me giggle and kick my feet

• They’ve both ruined and owe you SO MANY panties because they keep using them to jerk off or they cum in them. FOR SOME REASON IT STAINS AND JUST RUINS THE PANTIES and both of them feel so proud of doing that

HERE YOU NASTY PEOPLE I’VE FED YOU WITH THIS DECENTLY LONG DICK HCS THING

All jokes aside I really liked writing this so ty for the request babes <33

[m-ayo-o]

ok so we have bunny, puppy, kitty and cow reader….but imagine deer reader. hear me out here, she has the cutest antlers that gumi loves to grab, the fluffiest little tail and shes the cutest, clumsiest girl that trips over her own feet and she doesn’t have a single thought behind her big beautiful eyes -🫶🏻

ohhhhhh that's so cute !!!!!!

I haven't even written the cow reader fic yet OMGG how am I supposed to keep up withh all of these cuties !!!!

UM so yes deer reader is freaking adorable my bf actually calls me his 'little deer' sometimes ??? weird? idk

She would be a bit skittish and jumpy and nervous :s like he accidentally spooks her all the time, and and yes soooo clumsy 😖😖😖 megumi insists she holds onto his arm whenever they go out

UM AND YESTERDAY a little thought popped into my head

₍ᐢ･⚇･ᐢ₎

PIGGY READER !!!! again... it's the ears and tail.... they make it so cute... BUT the little snorty noises too like :'(((( I find piggies cute anyway hehe :#

[sebsxphia]

Just imagine the first time you go to The Hard Deck with Jake after your honeymoon. Just because you are back, it doesn't mean that the honeymoon phase is over - far from it. Jake was always very soft with you, you always saw what he hid from all the others, but your honeymoon opened up a whole new side of the both of you (especially if one or both of you were virgin). Your gazes at each other are filled with even more love, adoration, appreciation and linger longer. You both touch a lot more without even realising. You both smile even brighter at each other. It doesn't go unnoticed by the Daggers, who just playfully roll their eyes and tease you a bit. But they can't help being happy for seeing Jake like this with you.

-💚

ohhhhhh soft bf jake, has my heart, wholeheartedly 🥹 also virgin jake on your honeymoon! please! you know how much i adore this concept! your wedding day and your honeymoon was filled with so much love and tons of celebrations, but hell, the fact that jake gets to take you to the hard deck as your wife?! that’s the sweetest wedding gift ever. he’s such a wife guy. i love him! thank you so much for this sweet thought my beloved anon! 💌

[winemom-culture]

Something “funny” going on in my life rn is the other day I got our water bill from like March-April (it’s like, a little backlogged because the billing for utilities didn’t start until like 2 months into rent) and it was egregious, but me being very stupid having only paid my own water bill in apartments was like damn I guess that’s just the difference in utilities in a house huh

So luckily later I offhand mentioned it to my mom like “I think I need to turn my sprinklers down or something cause my water bill was $300” and she’s like 😐 something is seriously wrong with that and proceeds to show me her water bill for a bigger house where they run their sprinklers 5 days a week (ours is only 3) and it’s like $40. And I’m like ohhhhhh half relieved because at least something is wrong but half annoyed because now I have to figure out wtf going on

Pulled up the utilities usage on the portal thing out of curiosity and they tried to say in this bill period (mind you- before my bf even moved in) myself and my tiny son alone in our house used 35,000 gallons of water. My dad was like yeah even when you and all your brothers lived here and used water and with our sprinklers we barely break like 15,000 gallons for reference.

Then he told me some things to do like shutting off the water completely and seeing if the meter still runs indicating a leak somewhere or filling up a 5 gallon bucket and seeing if it counts 15 gallons for instance for a faulty meter

I said I would do those things and then simply did not this weekend I am overwhelmed by it (like who do I even call if we do suspect a leak, dad said something like this might be underneath the house, what if they come and say they can’t find anything) but I know I have to do it so. I will soon

[stylesloveclub]

r*ding pleasingrry's tummy 😵‍💫 like can you imagine you're just like staring at his chest and abdomen when he gets out of the shower or something and he's prattling on abt what you want for breakfast or whatever but you can't think just bc... well bc he's so dreamy 😵‍💫 and his tummy looks so soft but firm 😵‍💫 and you want to lick at it and kiss all over (especially at his pillowy hips with his swallows 😵‍💫) and then the thought of r*ding his tummy crosses your mind and 😵‍💫 oh em gee. and h, being the attentive doting bf that he is, comes closer when you don't answer his question about breakfast and like cradles your face all soft and strokes your cheeks delicately and "you okay, puppy? you're all quiet" and your face flushes and he's "what's the matter baby, you're all hot in the face" and you're trying to dismiss him because you're ✨embarrassed✨ but he won't let up like "no, pup, tell me what's wrong" and you start to squirm when he licks his lips and they get all glossy and look even more kissable than before 😵‍💫 and you just know he won't let it go until you tell him what's up so you finally whisper something along the lines of "you're jus' really pretty, daddy" (does pleasing y/n call h daddy? i dont remember i need to reread but if she doesn't she should bc he's SO baby daddy) and harry's like *ohhhhhh* and then he gets all smug and he's "yeah baby? what's so pretty abt your daddy" 😵‍💫 and you tell him bc you're his good girl 😌 and then (i imagined that you'd been in the bedroom this whole time, that wasn't clear jhfwiugruh) he'd start pushing you down on the bed and pressing kisses all over your skin until you can't stop wiggling under him and you're hot all over 😵‍💫. and somehow in the midst of all your kissing harry ends up underneath you, his towel lower on his hips so your p*ssy is skin to skin with his tummy 😵‍💫 and you humping and grinding against him and he's mocking you the whole time like "c'mon, get yourself off on your pretty daddy's tummy" 😵‍💫 and his hands are all over you, your thighs, bum, tits 😵‍💫 and he can't help but leave a few hickeys over your neck and collarbone and you're halfheartedly trying to bat him away while still grinding against him bc covering those up for your job at *his* restaurant is so much extra work but he doesn't listen and when he's finished sucking and licking he's "i'm sorry baby, daddy's sorry, you just look so pretty with my mark on you, so pretty when you're ruined" 😵‍💫 and you nearly keen bc what. the. fuck. he can't say shit like that and expect you not to melt. and when you're legs get tired he's "oh love, c'mon, keeping working yourself on me" but you just can't bc you've been at this for soooooo long (like ten minutes) so you just whimper and whine while your legs ache and your pace falters and he's "let's go pup, if you make yourself come like this i'll let you suck me off as a treat" 😵‍💫 and you're x10 energy now bc harry's c*ck in your mouth sounds absolutely exquisite rn and he chuckles at your enthusiasm and "oh puppy, you love my c*ck that much, huh? bet i could make you do anything for me if i gave you your treat after, right?" 😵‍💫 and you're nodding bc he's most definitely NOT wrong. and when you come it is EARTHSHATTERINGLY GOOD (as always) 😵‍💫 and he's cooing and whispering praises in your ear all "good girl puppy, such a good girl for your daddy, you did so good baby" 😵‍💫

UGH this is sooooooooo yummy . love him being concerned like are u okay puppy u seem quiet 🥺 but ur just being h word OFNEIFOSOFJW and yes he is so daddy like i needed him to be daddy for my own mental health bc he’s just so :( daddy :( and kissing all over 😭😭😭😭 this concept is so yummy and h word but i’m fixating on the kisses and the way he talks to u 🥺🥺🥺 and him not being able to help himself from leaving makes like he just wants to kiss u and loves pulling away to see the skin red and bruising :((((( i just want him so bad

[princessbrunette]

sketch is a gaming streamer that's gained a lot of popularity recently😭 my bf has made me watch w him n the what's up brother thing is like something he says a lot - 🍓

ohhhhhh the mystery is solved !! i always wondered what that was hehe

[dragonspleenspicy]

ok hear me out.

Mating season for a monster friend (or bf) of yours, where they end up completely feral 24/7 for the entire month/season and hold you captive in their “nest” (cave/apartment/den/etc) and use you repeatedly at any point as relief/their mate/humping toy etc. verbal or non-verbal. Also halters. idk bro I saw a furry comic where the character had a halter on and it hasn’t left my brain

Ohhhhhh that's really hot actually,,, fuck

[princesshillaryellaworld25]

Morning Shrugfriend: Sick Boyfriend had a good time last night(Roleplay)

Sick BF: *yawns* Man, I had a good night sleep last night~

You spotted bruises and bite marks all over his neck. You asked Sick Boyfriend if he was okay and why they're bruises all over his neck.

Sick BF: What do you mean?

Sick Boyfriend was confused and you pointed at his neck and told him about the hickeys and bite marks on his neck.

Sick BF: Ohhhhhh these! O-Oh well.....

Sick BF: T-They're.....uh...they're.....KISSES FROM MY SWEET DREAMS!

*mind* Kisses from sweet dreams?* You were confused, then Drugfriend showed up without a t-shirt and also have hickeys, bite marks and kisses on his neck.

Drugfriend: *yawns* Morning😊

You knew what was happening and said to Drugfriend:"Morning, Sweet Dreams~"

Sick BF:😳

Drugfriend: Uhhhh I'm so confused......

You told Drugfriend what he was talking about and he immediately blushed like crazy.

Drugfriend: Uhhhhhhhh😳 *mind* Crap!

This is my first time doing a roleplay by myself.

@partynoobvanii

@woody-dave

@starlightgirl242

[k-kizkhalifa]

s2ep6

LMFAOO THE DRAMA OF HIRO AND NOWAKI CONTINUES. But i’d also be asking questions if I was hiro, but also i wouldn’t bc nowaki is a sweet baby angel and would never do anything to hurt hiro. ever. E V E R.

hiro is about to kill this man!

the fact nowaki knows hi man so well… good lord. i love that them.

me: nowaki… darling you’re about to sent after YOURSELF.

alright hot take time: hiros monologue. congrats on your self awareness hiro. it is very much lacked in this show. this is why i think nowaki and hiro are the most well rounded couple of the show. and i don’t blame him for his thoughts, maybe from personal experience of (actual) cheating bc i was too consumed with work, but regardless of my understanding for hiro… i hate that nowaki feels so shut out by hiro and i think it speaks volumes that hiro is, perhaps, understanding he should offer more to nowaki.

LOL I KNOW ITS A SERIOUS MATTER BUT THE FACT NOWAKI USED THE WORDS “I DIDNT DO IT WITH -WHATEVER HIS NAME IS-!” I laughed.

Hiro, fk man we just had so much growth. Don’t say it’s none of your business. THIS MAN IS YOUR BABY LOVE BF.

AGAIN.. I love a good moment for Nowaki to know his fkn worth and express himself.

Hiro, last episode they were on: Don’t be a brat Nowaki.

Hiro, this episode when Nowaki doesn’t act like a brat: HOW DARE HE STAND UP TO ME!

lol at myogi getting caught and shinobu getting angry about it.

Hiro really thinking of expressing his love. My goodness. WE ARE HAVING SOME AMAZING GROWTH. ohhhhhh love that hiro is doing something for nowaki for once.

oKAY NOWAKI DARLING YOU ARE ABOUT TO BE REPLACED BY HIRO. OH WAIT THEY CAN TAG TEAM? I’ll send Nowaki AND hiro after the shitheads that piss me off in this show.

awe here it comes. nowaki gonna smooth it all over.

awe nowaki: my world revolves around you.

hiro *BLUSHING* he’s a fool and i’m a fkn fool too.

[the-geek-librarian]

12, 15 and 25 for Vanica, Dante and Zenon :D

HELLL YEAHHHHH THE BITCHES LETS GOOO. HI CY :DDD

12. What's a Headcanon you have for this character?

Dante: He can't cook for SHIT. like as much as I love him (which is more then I will ever openly admit) bro can't make a sandwich or boil and egg so Vanica runs him out the kitchen with a wooden spoon. Also he can't drink. Homie is a lightweight and he hates that so much

Zenon: He really likes dancing! Though no one (except Allen) knows about it. Not even Vani and Dante. Plus he has a REALLY big sweet tooth, if their is a box of sweets in his field of vision he will leave nothing for the rest the siblings (this annoys Dante beyond belief )

Vanica: She is (somehow) a really great cook! She kicked Lucius out of cooking duty a month after she learned the basics. Dante has made the "Haha, your a woman and you cook" joke only once in his whole life because Vanica put rat poison in his food and uhhh it wasn't a nice experience. And she can sing too! Most of the time she acts like she can't just to annoy ppl

15. What's your favorite ship with this character? ( Doesn't matter if it's canon or not)

Dante: OHHHHHH BOYYYY UHHH. Sweet rat man, I love you (regrettably) but your ass is so fucking bitchless. The closest thing he has to a relationship is the fact that he is fuckbuddys with Lucifero, I won't count Yami x Dante as a ship bc it's literally just rat man being a weird ass mother fucker and getting his ass beat which is funny as shit. However I will say he is pansexual and he will get into a relationship with literally anything and anyone.

Zenon: There is only one correct answer. Allen x Zenon for LIFE. Because come on BC fandom that man is not attached to Wemon in any way, only thing he feels for them is fear bc of Vanica and his Mom. But moving on they are soulmate-coded and I will die on that, Golden retriever bf and Black cat bf

Vanica: Listen, all of Vanica ships are fucking soulmate coded ok??? (I'm dilulu shut UP) and I love them with my heart (except Vanica x Acier, not soulmate-coded but annoying cat x Tired mother of 4). I have three I would die for bc I am insane. 1) Vanica x Megicula and Vanica x Lolopechka really they give off SUCH old married couple energy I wanna DIE. 2) Vanica x Lolo x Gajah, it's the "We can fix her" mentality AND THEY SECSIDED THE MOTHER FUCKERS. They are very funny and funky but not everyone's cup of tea but it's ok.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

Dante: My first impression was "OHHHH, he looks cool! (I also like the beard shot me) wonder what he can do" and now it's "Cring ass motherfucker pls stop being weird for the love of god (affectionately, I'm afraid), can you not have beef with an 18 year old?". Can you tell that I like him but wanna throw him of a clif?

Zenon: First impression "Emo boy, with a sad backstory incoming" I didn't care about bonehead at the start, I thought he had BANING magic but beyond that meh. And now "UHHH BABY BOY LIL WET CAT MAN BONE ASS IDIOT. can someone get this mans husband pls?" now I put him in my pocket and take him as far for house Zogratis as I can

Vanica: First impression "WEEEEEEE WEMON, IF HOT WHY EVIL???" I was uhh it was love at first sight honestly, same with Lolopechka so now I call them BOTH baby girls. Now "Oh baby- I would feel bad for what I put you through BUT I DONT SUFFER, then I wack her with the angst stick in almost all my Aus" really can you get more baby girl then Vanica? ( yes you can but SHUT up) she is both insane and has her mental health hanging on a thread, she really needs some tits to lean on and a tea to drink.

Thank you for the asks Cr!!

Asks for this are always open for any fandom I'm in!!

[teethpaste]

Sometimes you have sex with a person you shouldn’t, just to do it. Because of the lust or how badly you crave the feeling of being wanted. Because there’s a tiny voice screaming in the back of your head that THIS time will be different (when there’s zero proof to validate that thought). But it’s an important reminder that lust and like are different. Every time I do this I’m able to convince my swamp skull of a brain that MAYBE, just MAYBE it will be different. And it never is. I say out loud ohhhh I knew this would happen. That we’d text and talk like crazy for a few weeks to build it up. We’d have sex and then you’d leave again, vanish into thin air because having my body is another game to you.

Convincing me to let you in again - you’ll say all the things I want to hear. The things you know make my walls crumble. That even when you say you miss ME… we’re not thinking of missing the same things. Or maybe we are. But I miss when you slip from holding the small of my back to holding my hand when we’re walking around in public or when you rest your head on my shoulder for a cigarette on the stoop or even when I gently slip off your glasses for you when you fall asleep piss drunk on the couch. You miss slapping me in the face and choking me while having sex with me until you cum. We aren’t the same and I wish we were. Why can’t you want both? My delusional ass just rationalizes it in my head like “ohhhhhh he’s avoidant I’m sure he does miss you, he just doesn’t know how to express it”. But no. You do know how to express it up until you get what you came for. You’re a taker. And you took something again. And I’ll get over it, because it’s important to learn these kinds of lessons the hard way. And I let you do it. But damn.

The grossest part is I’m not even offended he used my body for sex I’m like oh god is it bc he saw me naked AGAIN and realized he’s not attracted to me??? Body dysmorphia is truly a mother fucker lol.

Even writing that out I find myself second guessing “was it worth it to let the love bomber back in. Cut him out. Then back in again to the point where you stepped over all your own boundaries, fucked him when you made accountability statements with friends and across social media platforms, and now you’re in the same position as before”. And at some level yeah it was. We had a fun evening and at some level it’s worth it to exist in fantasy land where I imagine us in a relationship. Because he’s the only person that has matched my level of weird/banter since I broke up with my last bf almost 2 years ago. But I also hate the fucking guilty gross feeling after when you realize that someone just wants to fuck you not love you and their words don’t match their actions. Even worse when it feels like they’re incapable of loving .. not just you, but anyone. Oh well. Back to the drawing board!

Also the funny thing is like, he told me he would disappoint me. And I told him I knew he would, but I wouldn’t be mad this time. And it’s true that I’m not mad. Old me would send a text now to be like SEE this is why I told you to leave me alone, because you come back in and you take and then you leave. But I knew he was going to do that. And he knows that I know that. Deep down I knew it would be the same. And I let him anyway. And that doesn’t need a conversation between the two of us to clarify. But I still find myself dipping my toe into a bit of delusion thinking “because I’m not gonna say anything this time, that will almost hurt him more”. And maybe it will. Or maybe it won’t. It probably won’t. If it ain’t the consequences of my own actions.

[ginger-snap-talkin-nonsense]

So considering how far you and your BF have gotten into the show, how'd you guys think the CMC been handled?

Ohhhhhh my god I wish they were better I realllly wish they were better holy shit they have so much potential and when they’re good they’re amazing but holy FUCK is it either a solid 4 or a Deep 1 out of 5 when you catch a CMC episode.

Also everyone has said it before but they’re ultimate resolve to stay the CMC is wasted potential but imma hit you with it and say no one has gotten what they could’ve been right yet except me and @pastamansta and I don’t know if y’all are ready for what we cooked up