#ok ok OK i'm so fuckin happy right now lmao this was my FAVORITE FAVORITE song as a kid

[beingfacetious]

please give us the correct negative Ted lasso review

Oh my God. This feels like a trap but I can't help it

update from the other side, this is no joke 2k words long and it's not uh happy lmao so dead dove do not eat

TL;DR:

Bill Lawrence's involvement lessened every season and it fuckin' shows

There were arcs and plot points established over the first two seasons that the writers very obviously just changed their minds about for this season

Takes about this season being dark/ending sad on purpose are MUCH too generous. like giving WAY too much credit.

It turns out most of my feelings boil down to "it's not aggressively bad it's just nonsensical"

How tf was every episode twice as long as in previous seasons but everything important happened offscreen

FIRST OF ALL, since MONTHS before the season started airing, I've nursed a conspiracy theory that Bill Lawrence left the show because of creative differences with Jason Sudeikis and that therefore this season would be significantly less good than previous seasons. This started when I saw Bill tweet that he was going home, basically, and I figured we'd get "season 3 is in post" news shortly thereafter but instead there was that weird stuff about things being delayed because of rewrites...? Anyway, that is mostly to say that I was ready to think this season was worse because I love Bill Lawrence's storytelling and have forever and you should give Cougar Town a shot if you haven't yet it's no Scrubs but it's sweet

There were interviews early in the show in which I swear Jason/Brendan/whoever said they pitched the show to Bill because he's fuckin' good at TV and he basically said "this is a great idea but you're writing to the wrong ending, it should be this," and they were like "wow you're right that is a better ending." I can't find that now but I did find this from a more recent Bill interview:

I ran that show the first year because Jason was still shooting movies while we were doing the writers room. Then, at the end of that year, much like Gary with me, I was like, “Ah, I’ll spend a couple of months teaching him how to edit.” But after like a day or two, he’s like, “Yeah, I got it.” (Laughs.) So, the second year, we ran it together, and I’m only able to do other things now because that guy ran the show himself the third year, as it should be. It’s his voice and his world this season.

Now look, Bill Lawrence is obviously not trying to throw shade here because he's lovely and also this is a Hollywood Reporter article and how immature would that be, but I can throw shade for him and I will: Jason Sudeikis is a talented comedic actor and seems like a very nice man and he had a good idea for a show, and his instincts to involve an extremely experienced showrunner with an insane talent for feelsy found family sitcoms were good and he should have stuck to them!! Telling Bill Lawrence you're good after two days of editing instruction or whatever is stupid!! Insisting on your voice and your world when BILL LAWRENCE'S VOICE IS AVAILABLE TO YOU and also you CO-CREATED THE WORLD whatever gdi

OK fine I'll do Ted/Rebecca next. Obviously I was in for Ted/Rebecca. I wanted them to put their faces together. But look, I'm not a shipper over all else; over all else I want a good storyteller to tell me the story they want to tell. If I expect things or see them coming, that's not bad! That's good! If I'm surprised by things, that's good too as long as it holds together! "Subverting expectations" shouldn't look like spiting the audience, a lie is not a twist, etc. SO. If Ted and Rebecca were meant to be platonic soulmates, that's fine!!! I don't NEED them to kiss!!! But I do not believe these people are even friends in season 3, after season 1 and tbh most of my favorite parts of season 2 were about how much they impact each other's lives. That's a dropped ball and there's NO REASON to have not made time for them to interact meaningfully because every episode was so fucking long. Instead I guess we had to know how super sad Rebecca was about not being able to have children but not need to talk to anyone about it and immediately be fully over it. Also see a lot of lingering shots of Rebecca...looking at a matchbook...

sfjbkfgs early in the season they very obviously established that Rebecca's arc was going to be realizing she actually loves the team and wants to support them and see them succeed because of her own heart and not to spite Rupert, and I guess that happened but why didn't it happen gradually in ways I could see, why did it happen in an episode in which I'm supposed to have known all along that this has to do with her childhood self ?? and in which Rupert has a FULL personality change to facilitate her sudden realization. In what fucking world would he invite her to that meeting, because she's smart or because she brings ~diversity or because maybe he wants to sleep with her again? None of it tracks at all lmao but it was also the episode in which I really enjoyed Tony Head so whatever

speaking of not tracking, Nate.........I've never been invested in Nate especially but he was SO cartoonishly evil at the start and then kind of never again. I was braced for a redemption arc I wouldn't care about but that didn't even really happen?? he got a girlfriend and realized Rupert was a bad role model? it turns out his dad thinks he was a prodigy and always just wanted him to be happy, which, lmao WHAT where????? and what am I supposed to believe about Jade changing her mind about him btw because she's seen people be terrible to him at that very table before AND she has to know he loves the place and the food because he's there all the time, so what was the revelation that turned her from relatable-via-Nate-ambivalence to suddenly heart-eyes just fdslelugatw so much of my feeling about this season isn't even like it's bad it's just it's nonsense

One of my big complaints about the season is just Keeley's whole deal. Separating her from the team/rest of the cast was a wild choice. Barbara is fine but I also would have been perfectly fine without her and none of the other new characters for the PR side story added anything to the show. Especially if at the end Rebecca is just going to write Keeley a check for the chump change she needs to run the agency. Why didn't we just do that to begin with??? I guess this season I'm supposed to think Keeley ~learned to be independent in various ways but, again, I don't ?? And her needing to not be with Roy I guess as part of that and then get back together offscreen but then not really be together maybe but then also possibly having throuple vibes later that never get acknowledged feels, whatever, like something Bill Lawrence didn't write sdfjlsefaj,lwte I know this is my unsupportable argument that post I RBed was making fun of but idc

also Jamie wanting to be with Keeley at the end of the show feels extremely Harry Potter epilogue to me lmao Jamie you don't have to marry someone you went to high school with there are so many people

Roy was fine this season. He didn't have much to do but that's probably for the best lol. Him taking Ted's job is probably the only main character ending I feel like makes sense for this season and the overall show. Him training and begrudgingly becoming friends with Jamie was always funny.

OK one of the wrong reviews was basically like if you don't appreciate this season you don't appreciate classic tragic structure. Fuck off with that. First of all this was a sitcom about soccer so even if they were going for a classic tragedy in season 3 that's stupid and they shouldn't have been. But I also just don't think that's what was happening ??? I think I'm supposed to believe everyone gets a happy ending and I just don't. Like the whole oh it's sad that Ted ends up where he started and it's about how persistent optimism and kindness can burn you out or whatever, that's...if that's what they were going for, again, why tf, and also could we have seen that like. at all. Ted barely Teds for anyone this season (frex the previously mentioned never talking to Rebecca). ROY Teds more than Ted in season 3. If we got to see Ted trying to Ted even, like, twice, and either not being able to dig down and find the positivity or I guess noticing that he needs someone to be that for him, OK, fine. A Ted/Keeley scene would have been a PERFECT vehicle for this. Didn't happen. idk if we're supposed to think he's getting back together with Michelle but that would be so...so bad ??? like what about Tan Lines??? why even have Tan Lines??? even if not, we just left completely unaddressed her starting a relationship with their marriage counselor, which is also BAD lmao. God why did I have to see so much of Michelle this season. Michelle video calls every other episode and two lines for Dr. Sharon. Nonsense. lol one of my friends summarized Ted's ending as "yeah going back to the unfulfilling life that didn't work before the show started is a victory for our protagonist"

Even the soccer of it all re that whole thing was silly. Oh marriage counselor boyfriend is a bad guy because he doesn't care about the soccer game. Oh Ted is happy now because he's coaching Henry's rec league soccer team. like it's fine that EVERYONE is still together in Richmond but he's "home" now and still around soccer which is good because we definitely saw him learn to love soccer during the course of the show. sure Jan

(to be fair I am not the audience for "it's about the kid" plots so even if I felt like it worked from the start of the show for Ted to choose moving back to where Henry is, which I don't, I wouldn't care for it, so maybe those criticisms aren't especially valid) (I didn't care about JD's kid either)

speaking of the soccer though every single scene that revolved around the actual soccer team was essentially perfect. Great use of so many of those boys. Very few notes. Sam in particular had a few nice things this season and of course Colin. Another incorrect review by a critic I actually like very much was complaining about Colin's story this season and it being tired and overdone and not caring about Trent's or Isaac's parts of it, but I actually really disagree! It was well done and it was nice to see in the context of professional sports where, sorry, coming out and being received well is not a cliche thing that happens a lot! Also, hot take! Zava was a good part of this season! Nice contained little story that impacted some characters I actually care about plus he was legit funny! Sometimes things in a comedy should be funny! I'd honestly watch three more seasons of Richmond-focused half-hour episodes with idk probably Brett Goldstein in charge

I haven't mentioned Beard because I just never understood what I was supposed to think about him lmao. By far the funniest character overall but I never felt settled on whether he was meant to be a manic pixie comic relief BFF or if he was like...a real person?? It strikes me as potentially bad that he was so worried about Ted's mental state all the time and never really mentioned his own and that was sort of a thing in the weird s2 episode but then not again? I felt so much ire about so much else I didn't have any for him marrying Jane lmao but I do understand the people who are upset about that because that sure seemed pretty toxic, but wasn't it supposed to be played for laughs? Does that fit in a show that's supposed to mainly be about people treating each other well because we're all we've got? idk, RIP Beard, sorry your best friend in the world wasn't at your wedding because it would have been narratively underwhelming to see him leave and then see him back at a future major event or whatever

idk idk, season 1 Rebecca was one of my favorite characters ever and I was so angry in the middleish of the season about how much I felt like she was being wasted, but by the end I was just like...I mean, what's to be mad at. She's not even her anymore. Ted wasn't Ted anymore. Nate I guess literally reverted back to season 1 Nate which also is that...okay...him ending up lower than he started out feels not great

Good for Mae and the bar boys though, used just the right amount this and every season and always a damn delight

OK this is ridiculous I'm going to be done now. I do want to say I enjoyed several episodes this season a lot! A couple top 10 potentials! I really enjoyed the Amsterdam one actually because it reminded me of like a Nancy Meyers movie, very nice and warm, but it feels worth noting that that is not a feeling I would describe as being struck by fucking lightning :))))))

in conclusion maybe we as a nation can move on now from giving SNL alumni we find charming huge budgets and ethereally talented casts and collaborators and letting them get us emotionally invested in their midlife crises sandbox playing

[monstersliveinthemirror]

My TTPD First Listen Reactions:

1. Fortnight: ~what about your quiet treason~ HAHAH THIS HURTS BECAUSE HE MOVED TO FLORIDA WITH HIS WIFE 😂😭 

2. The tortured poets department: I definitely feel like I would like this more if I was stoned rn. ~who's gonna know you like me!!!!!~ ~sometimes I wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me~

3. My boy only breaks his favorite toys: the delusion of "I'll tell you that he runs because he loves me" okay 😭😭 he saw forever so he smashed it up in ONCE I FIX ME HE'S GONNA MISS ME ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

4. Down bad: what an accurate break up song lmao. ~fuck you if I can't have us~

5. So long London: "and I'm pissed off you let me give all that youth for free" yeah fuck me spending my 20s in love with you 😡😡 

6. But Daddy I love him: I wish I had this song when I was 15 and rebellious also is this song about fucking swifties who lost it when she and Matty were together 

7. Fresh out of the slammer: this song broke me. "All those night she kept me going SWIRLED YOU INTO ALL MY POEMS" 😭. (But also I really am not a fan of the weird beat change toward the end??)

8. Florida!!!: fuck me up Florida fr. I think this might be my favorite??

9. Guilty as sin?: I am going to throw up. They don't know you how you've haunted me so stunningly. I choose you and me, religiously 😭😭😭😭 am I allow to cry????? 

10. Who's afraid of little old me?: this one is gonna have to grow on me, I think. Okay actually now that I'm into it, it's grown on me lmao

11. I can fix him (no really I can): this is...okay. just okay.

12. Loml: literally crying immediately. "I felt a glow like this, never before and never since" 😭 "I felt a hole like this, never before and ever since" 😭😭😭 LOSS OF MY LIFE??? This fuckin broke me.

13. I can do it with a broken heart: holy whiplash. A BOP????? Incredible. Wow. I love this. Thanks for rubbing how much better you are than me in my face Taylor lmao

14. The smallest man who ever lived: verse three makes this song tbh. 

15. The alchemy: aw I miss that happy in love everything is meant to be feeling.

16. Clara Bow: promise to be dazzling (I need a pinky promise emoji) the outro 🥺🥺🥺🥺

----

17. The Black Dog: "and I may never open up the way I did for you" 😭😭😭 holy fuck just break me why don't you. "I still can't believe it" 

18. imgonnagetyouback: Olivia Rodrigo has the chance to do the funniest thing ever here lmaoooo "say you got someone else say I got someone too" wow wow wow PICK YOUR POISON BABE I'M POISON EITHER WAY????!!!!!

19. The Albatross: I don't think I have anymore coherent thoughts right now but I dig it??

20. Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus: cause I wonder will I always wonder????????? 🥺 

21. How did it end? I really wanted to like this one but I'm not there yet lol the tempo is just weird 

22. So high school: this is so cute omg

23. I hate it here: I'm lonely but I'm good I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine.......this place made me feel worthless. It's ok I don't live in Charleston anymore. 

24. thanK you aIME: IMAGINE ANDREA SWIFT HATING YOU I really like this one it's kinda like mean 

25. I look in people's windows: "I'm afflicted by the not knowing" babe me too "does it feel alright to not know me I'm addicted to the "if only"" SCREAMING. 

26. The prophecy: fuck man fuck fuck fuck. 

27. Cassandra: oh this is for the Greek mythology girlies huh? Alright I'm in.

28. Peter: yes babe more piano pls hahah do you know how long it took me to realize this was referencing Peter Pan I'm so dumb 

29. The Bolter: "excellent fun 'til you get to know her" me too.  

30. Robin: this one is really sweet omg

31. The Manuscript: but the story isn't mine anymore 🥺

[iguessyouregonnamissthepantyraid]

do you have any good fix it reddie fic rec? because lmao i just watched the movie again and i'm sad now they deserved a happy ending i'm gonna sue everybody

DO I

Things That Happen After Eddie Lives (107k) is my number one, my absolute top choice, literally everything i’ve ever needed and the writing is phenomenal and all the losers get a little bit of spotlight (including stan! he’s still dead but like, trust me, he’s there) and it just. it just feels SO realistic and in character for all of them, it made me laugh and cry several times and! and! i usually skip over smut in these kinds of fics, but-- HOO BUDDY. not this time, man, not this time. i could go on for days about how much i love this fic but just go ahead and read it and we’ll scream about it together

hoping to be found (25k) is like, the ultimate eddie-centric comfort piece. really hit deep on the “middle-aged repressed gay man upending his entire life to try and be happy” note that is like half the reason i fell in love with him as a character, plus it contains what might be my favorite exchange between these two ever: “I shouldn’t have bothered you-” // “Bother me. Eds, fucking, come on, you’re my best friend, you mean more to me than anyone on the goddamn planet, bother me.” Richie’s voice breaks, filled to the brim with genuine desperation. like HELLO??? i’m crying again just thinking of it nbd

feet on the ground, head in the sky (20k) eddie and richie have a lot of long distance phone calls after the end of the movie, they get together, everything’s so sweet and i cried twice

you never cried to them, just to your soul (23k) stan lives! eddie lives! this is an au in which chapter two literally never happened and instead they finish killing pennywise when they’re like, 18, so it’s just fantastic and there are adorably light hearted sequels

pretty much every single reddie fic by theappleppielifestyle, there’s like 6 of them and they’re all fuckin CHOICE, just go through every single one and you’ll have a headache from all the happy tears i promise

we were always here at the right time (17k) hoooly shit holy shit ok i read this last night and i’m still not over the way it basically sucker punched me in the chest several times in a row, another good take on the “everything’s the same as canon except eddie lived fuck you” premise

anyway. yeah. those are my favorites sorry for accidentally being SUPER verbose because i just honestly don’t know how else to be

[archirenaux]

Wait can I ask for Wynn and Niall on the "get to know my characters" thing? I'm interested in if you'd make changes now :)

yes you can!!! it was fun to see what i’ve discovered about them over the years, tbh, especially in the case of niall. i think he has changed the most vs. how he was when i first “made” him, like, 4-5 years ago? yikes.

01. Full name: Wynn Ercwlff Carmichael (I couldn’t actually remember the middle name I originally gave him so I went with the most Welsh bastard I could find)02. Best friend: I remain a BIG FAN of him being best friends with Marcas and Helbert.03. Sexuality: He’s an artiste... who knows.04. Favorite color: I won’t waste your time by naming them because he fore sure cannot decide, though he does keep coming back to pear green.05. Relationship status: Married B)06. Ideal mate: Wynn found his way into being a lil’ uptight under the careful watch of his mother and then after he started working with teenagers who can stress him tf out, so someone who would help him relax at the end of the day. Someone who doesn’t put too many expectations on him, or demand too much of him. (Not that he can’t handle responsibility, he just can’t really handle demanding people at this stage in life.) Someone funny, creative, and supportive. :’)07. Turn-ons: Nice smiles, lots of laughter, affection, a feeling of security with the person, compassion, and humor.08. Favorite food: Crempog/pancakes09. Crushes: His wife @theblushdahlia aka you)10. Favorite music: Duran Duran, Hall & Oates, Men at Work, aaaand probably Tears for Fears tbqh.11. Biggest fear: He got two. 1) Not being able to provide for his family and 2) waking up one day and feeling like he didn’t do enough re: his career in art/that he settled by becoming a teacher.12. Biggest fantasy: Rn his biggest fantasies really revolve around his children succeeding and being happy when they grow up? Lame!!! (jk)13. Bad habits: He’s so dang indecisive!!! Midnight snacking, biting the ends of pens and pencils and things, tries too hard to make people feel okay about something until they’re like “ok thx but pls stop”, can get kinda whiny about small things, leaves the toilet seat up a lot, and not to drag him but he probably drinks a lot of expensive juices.14. Biggest regret: His falling out with his mom because it was right on the cusp of her getting sick and he didn’t try to patch things up for awhile.15. Best kept secrets: He can’t count to 100. Lol jk. I think, for a long time, it was his family (specifically, the state of it and his relationships with them).16. Last thought: “When will these children finally all be asleep AT THE SAME TIME???”17. Worst romantic experience: That time he proposed to his gf at the time and she said no lol.18. Biggest insecurity: His art and his ability to make art.19. Weapon of choice: Even in the FWW verse I wouldn’t say his wand because he is just Not Great at defensive magic, so idk. He’s the least violent character I have, probably.20. Role Model: I don’t think he has a role model but in terms of someone who he respects and inspires him, it’d be Calista, especially after everything she’s gone through and how she’s such a great mom to their kids.

xxx

01. Full name: Niall Brennan Mulloy02. Best friend: [banging pots n pans together] JER-EM-Y WOOD ( @multisamicis​​ )03. Sexuality: Hetero but I mean, we all know the Jeremy/Joce/Niall ot3 is something he’d be into.04. Favorite color: [Niall Mulloy voice]: Who over 10 has a fuckin’ favorite color? (It’s a blue-gray.)05. Relationship status: Obviously it depends on the timeline, but where he is in the verse in which he currently exists, he is in fact in a loving and committed relationship with Marlene ( @theinglenook​ ​). 06. Ideal mate: From his perspective, someone intelligent and relatively spontaneous, not boring or naive. Someone who’s not very dependent or WEIRD (lol he’s v. judgmental so he would not fare well with someone Quirky). He likes someone who can take charge but not necessarily controlling/bossin’ him around. But I also think he needs someone who will pull him out of shell (though, to be clear, I don’t mean in the He’s Shy type of shell, because he definitely isn’t, but the shell he’s constructed for himself that can limit the things he experiences or the people he interacts with cuz he Jaded and closed-off). Also, someone who’ll call him out when he’s a dick and not like, police his behavior but make him face the facts when he’s being ridiculous. And, depending on the timeline, someone who’s not only chill with him having a daughter but likes and is kind to her.07. Turn-ons: You know as well as I that he is a Butt Man(TM). But also, back to the taking charge thing →  ✓. Ummm. Long hair, good hygiene, lots of kissing, aaaand idk, I don’t want to sound redundant by saying intelligence but it’s true, but he’s also kinda shallow so like if you hot, he’s like “nice.”08. Favorite food: Forfar bridies09. Crushes: Other than the babysitter his parents hired when he was like, eight? His gal, Marlene.10. Favorite music: He’s not a huge music person, tbh. He will mostly listen to whatever his brother, Ian, is playing, which is 70′s/80′s punk music (Buzzcocks, Stiff Little Fingers, Joy Division, Ramones, etc). He’s been conditioned to enjoy it. But if he were to make the steps to explore more and see what he really likes, he’d be more into The Who and, like, Cream, haha. 11. Biggest fear: Losing the people he loves/cares about.12. Biggest fantasy: Tbh, to just be a good dad, brother, friend, bf, etc. He has always felt like he’s not doing enough irt his interpersonal relationships, but he’s reached a point where he wants to make an effort to be better.13. Bad habits: Can I call general apathy a bad habit? Lmao. But also, hardly remembers to do the dishes until there’s a full sink, judging people before he gets to know them, bad at communicating, swearing a lot, smoking, and ya know being generally unfriendly for no valid reason (though less so than he has in the past).14. Biggest regret: He has... A Few of those, but I guess his biggest one, in FWW verse, was that time he disappeared and didn’t tell anyone where he was for months LOL!15. Best kept secrets: He reeeally, really truly believes he let his brother down. Niall thinks he failed Ian in so many ways, but it’s something he doesn’t want to say aloud for fear of it being validated.16. Last thought: It was either about Maggie, Marlene, Jeremy, or work lmao.17. Worst romantic experience: He didn’t have very many romantic experiences before he got together with Marlene when he was around 18. But I guess if I took the definition of romantic much, much more loosely, I could say that the two-birds-one-day fiasco was like, super great while it happened, but the backlash was A Lot ahahahhaha.18. Biggest insecurity: Niall’s reluctant to show his emotions because he’s forgotten how and it makes him feel Weak when he does, so -- that!19. Weapon of choice: Tbh, I honestly don’t know. His fists? Prob.20. Role Model: His mom.