#once again i'm publicizing unhinged ideas that i send to

[clairdeluneandmurder]

A selection of unhinged quotes from my political theory professor:

"Socrates has a tiny ghost in his head telling him when things are wrong. Unfortunately, it doesn’t tell him when things are right so he’s just really annoying."

*Brings a 1-liter bottle of sparkling water to every class and drinks the whole thing during lecture.*

“The flood happened because God looked down at earth and said ‘I don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to do with this’, and so he nerfed us again.”

“God comes down and asks ‘Where my people at?’ And Adam and Eve are like ‘We done fucked up’.”

“Any schmuck can match their socks to their shoes but the mark of a true gentleman is matching your socks to your mood.” - said because someone insulted his neon pink socks.

“At that point, everyone else would be dead and it would just be Carl Schmidt waddling around Germany all alone.”

Prof: “Is the Illuminati still a thing with your generation?” Student: “Yeah” Prof: “The number one rule of the Illuminati is toughen the fuck up.”

“You can read Hobbes’ Behemoth if you're like a glutton for punishment or something.”

“The neat thing about soup is that you can start with the same ingredients and end up with a new soup every time.”

“If any of you steal my pies I’m going to assume you’re possessed by a demon... I made a pie yesterday. You have NO IDEA how much fruit goes into one of those fuckers.”

“The great thing about Locke is he’s dead. Once you’re a corpse you can be used for anything.”

“I am the crazy leftist professor your parents warned you about. I will make you read Marx and I will say that racism is bad. Sue me.”

"de Sade would be great at being on the internet. And I do mean that as an insult."

Brought a jar to class and put a dollar in it every time he used the word ‘neoliberal’, said he'd give us the money that goes in at the end of the semester. (we each got 3 bucks, there are 15 people in the class)

"Time is a flat circle and I am but a lonely goldfish cracker."

“By a show of hands, who is hungover today? I’ll go first to make you feel better. I am hungover today, be nice to me."

Starts lecture by writing on the whiteboard: “THE ECONOMY IS STUPID”

“Just to be clear, I’m not saying we should guillotine people who open soap shops on Etsy.”

“People don’t get my Simpsons references anymore. You kids today with your sponge bob and anime.”

“If you need help, please ask for it. The worst thing that happens is I send you a super condescending email and you’re no worse off.”

“You’re a shitty libertarian if you accidentally become a Leninist.”

“Anyone seen one of these modern garbage trucks? It’s sick right?! Pretty fucking cool!” proceeds to do an impression of a garbage truck “Marx would love to drive around a dope robot truck.”

"That’s what makes babies just awful. They don’t understand that they don’t always get what they want."

"For how many of y’all does getting stoned and staring at a wall to ponder morality sound like a great class?"

“I once had a student use the topic 'The only way to commune with the aliens is through nuclear warfare' for this assignment, nothing you write can scare me anymore."

“I'm not going to make you read this. It’s 4 volumes, 2500 pages, and mostly about how linen is produced. Moments of brilliance though.”

“I think we should replace the death penalty with public humiliation. ”

"Crude Freudism will get you 80% of the way there 90% of the time."

"I’m going to throw my uncle under the bus here… Actually, I fucking hated that guy and he’s dead so whatever."

"The best thing you can do for your future happiness is to never think about politics. …I say to a bunch of people enrolled in a 400-level political theory class. Y’alls mental health is fucked I guess."

"God tells you not to do the one Bad Thing and Eve is just so sexy that man has to do the one Bad Thing."

"I haven’t worn a 1950’s bra but I’ve heard they’re very uncomfortable. …Not that I’m opposed, I just don’t have the access and I've been banned from three museums so far."

"Course evaluations are available now y’all. I don’t care what you say about me or the class, but make sure you mention how great my hair is."

"Identity politics can be useful, but I think we’ve probably taken it too far since now we’re at the point where Kid Rock is shotgunning 18 packs of bud light on Twitter as a form of protest."

"We basically live in an aristocracy where you can vote. Sorry to disappoint you if you think Joe Biden is a communist."

"Do you know why we didn’t celebrate international workers day on May first? Because America says fuck you, that’s why."

[pinkdreamcollectorsworld]

i wanted to send this as an ask bc im shy on public tumblr posts but! first of all good luck and congrats, fanfic writing is so fun & it's so brave of you to start & put yourself out there <3 i've been writing fic since i was 13 so i have a few (hard earned) tips, which im sharing just bc you asked for some !! i'm SORRY IT'S SO LONG OH MY GOD I did not expect to write my uh Ten Fic Commandments????? but dbdhdjwj here you go i hope they help <3

1) don't be afraid to mess up, like seriously. I had a HUGE issue looking back/thinking on past fics I wrote bc the writing was ~so cringe~. it made me want to delete everything, even the stuff that had good reviews. but I once saw a school play, and the kids were 11-13, and they sang and danced their little hearts out, and were any of them amazing? no. most of them weren't talented at all. but I grinned the whole time because they were having fun and I had fun with them. as long as you're having fun then so will everyone else

2) no one ever masters style or grammar or syntax or blah blah blah. it evolves every single time you write something new. the best way to figure out what YOU like is to go look at your favorite fic and analyze HOW it was written. then Emulate (don't copy; emulate) their style, their tone (to do this, you're going to want to study how they use all of those boring english class words like imagery and metapher and ominomonimepia. how do they phrase things, how much detail do they go into? how much do they describe? how many dialogue tags, and which ones? where is the verb in the sentence; before or after the adverb (i.e. 'quickly running' or 'running quickly'). You'll pick it up, and because you're emulating and no impression is perfect it will become your own naturally. And then you get to watch yours shift and shift and shift and shift and shift and shi

3) as long as you're having fun, try not to give a shit about characterization, editing, etc etc. you attract the people who like YOUR style and your portrayal, and if people don't like it they usually, in my experience, simply click away. honestly not even because they're good people, but because they simply don't have the time or energy to write a bad comment. laziness as a sign of genuine kindness (?) maybe so

4) I know everyone always says comments & kudos & bookmarks don't matter as long as you're having fun, and maybe to some people they don't, but if they do that's Okay. because that's a piece of you. they matter to plenty of people, including me!! It makes sense to share something and want to see your efforts rewarded. try to find a person in the fandom you're writing for, whether it's thru tumblr or ao3 comments or twitter or Whatever, & if you click, stick to em like glue, because they're about to be Spammed With Snippets. you gotta find a pal to be absolutely unhinged with

5) If you get stuck, skip. I can't tell you how many random snippets I have floating around for different ideas, or the same idea at different points in the writing timeline, stuff like that. If you have an idea in your head then write That; don't worry about the other stuff. That can come later

6) Speaking of getting stuck, if you're stuck at a particular part, just write out the dialogue or the action without any fancy phrasing. Whenever I get stuck I just start describing what I want to happen, and for me, it sometimes evolves into me picking up the narrative again. You can go back later to properly describe how kevin was eating his ham sandwich

7) have fun in your author's notes. go batshit. people love to see batshit & if you love to be batshit then embrace that so hard. be so so so so cringe and awkward and nerdy. i love to see a person having a good ol fashioned insane time & I know a bunch of people who do too

8) don't worry about editing if you don't want to. honestly it's so overrated. i once edited a chapter three times and had THREE OTHER PEOPLE read it through to make sure everything read well, and we ALL missed the fact that 5 guys + 6 guys most DEFINITELY does not equal 13 guys. in any situation at all. it was a laugh, helped me to not take things so seriously. I recently went back to have a laugh & even though I edited it to fix it at the time the comments pointed it out, there was STILL A COUPLE OF ADDITION MISTAKES THAT I MISSED AND NEVER FIXED. IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS FJDJDJWK. you learn to laugh about that stuff, that's the whole point i think

9) please don't be afraid to mess around with setting & aus and such. feel free to turn that character into a cat Just Because. not everything needs an explanation & sometimes it's just more fun to be like "yeah idk he's a cat now Because I Say So! enjoy the chapter & if you like leave me a comment or a kudos!! 1 comment = 1 meow" just be totally unashamed of your good time, whatever that looks like to you

10) if you ever need a cheerleader, my ims are open <3 good luck, have fun, may the force be with you !!!!

p.s. take a shot every time i say 'fun'

I love this! Thank you!

[cuubism]

so often with characters that are like, ancient eldritch entities or whatever, the common interpretation is that they’d be baffled by modern technology or just hate it, which kinda makes sense. HOWEVER

i fully believe that Dream gets addicted to tiktok in 3 seconds flat

(it’s full of DREAMS okay. the entire internet is full of DREAMS. it has such a high concentration of dreams (and nightmares). dream gets pulled in against his will and never escapes)