#or maybe even a year at this point idfk. i cannot. write. or at least not multichaptered. i want to create an ongoing story

[malkaviian]

i hate the weird spot i have been when it comes about writing for the past months

[tyrannuspitch]

thinking about w****** s** again and it’s just... making me so sad so i’m going to repeat points i’ve already made while gazing off into the night

i still just... can’t understand how r*well managed to mangle her own message that badly

simon and baz aren’t murderers. they’ve been in situations where killing is unavoidable but they hate it and they just /couldn’t/ do some of what happened in That Book, even if they had far more reason to. that’s the whole POINT with the war: they both think - or try to think - that they Should kill each other, that they have a duty and/or moral imperative to do so, and they both have their worst most dysfunctional sides sort of compulsively spurring them on into Their Duties, but! they! CAN’T! they never could!!! and there is far more reason for that than just “well they’re in love what do you expect”!!! this is about WHO THEY ARE!!!

and besides that... i don’t know. i know there were definitely problems with her writing of vampires-who-aren’t-baz before this, but i thought at least SOME of it was meant to be dysfunctional. and i thought with four YEARS to think she might have realised that, realistically, baz CANNOT be the only Good One, maybe even that realistically baz is not just not the exception but not even AN exception... there are so many ways she could have progressed this, improved it, matured the writing, but she went SO FAR BACKWARDS that their attitude to vampires-other-than-baz is like... idfk. like they’re mosquitoes who are challenging to swat or something. and it just doesn’t make SENSE, emotionally or thematically. like, if Monsters™ actually are all Evil™, what was the point of the mage being so hyper-military and paranoid and scaremongering? what was the point of the dragon scene? what was the point of the humdrum (the mage’s creation!!) FORCING them to attack mages? what was the point of the mage employing the VAMPIRES to attack watford? what was the point of simon having dragon wings and a devil tail? what was the fucking POINT?

[xiuhunsoo]

got tagged by @ilovkji to answer 85 questions about myself! thank you love! 

idk who to tag tho, i feel like i’m gonna annoy people :(((

last

1. drink – lemon iced tea

2. phone call – my dad today

3. text message – uh one of my best friends

4. song you listened to – f(x) ft zico - traveller

5. time you cried – sunday when i watched along with the gods with tawa

ever

6. dated someone twice? - haven’t even dated anyone once so no

7. kissed someone and regretted it – no

8. been cheated on – still no and if anyone ever does they have another thing coming

9. lost someone special – yes

10. been depressed – idk i never got it diagnosed with it but looking back on things i probably was for a while, i’m not anymore though only have some other mental shit going on 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up – nah, i stop before it comes to that point

fave colours

12. any shade of blue

13. dark red

14. dark green

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends – yes

16. fallen out of love – no

17. laughed until you cried – lmao 10 times already just this week

18. found out someone was talking about you – yes both in good and bad ways

19. met someone who changed you - oh yes

20. found out who your friends are - YEAH LMAO

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list – no

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl – all of them except one nobody really uses facebook anymore so i never really added my internet friends and i never added strangers

23. do you have any pets – no :(((( 

24. do you want to change your name – no

25. what did you do for your last birthday – uhhhhh ohh i met three friends and we went to explore the city and got lunch together and then one of my best friends surprised me at home with presents and decorated it was really cute and we went for cocktails!

26. what time did you wake up today – considering i slept like 1-2 hours today and it didn’t feel like i slept at all idk when exactly i woke up

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - was on tumblr, was chatting with rina and was trying to write that luchen drabble for her

28. what is something you can’t wait for – the zoo trip on saturday, my bulgaria holidays in two weeks and netherlands trip with my dad and berlin + music bank in september!

30. what are you listening to right now – nothing, i feel like just listening to the city’s sounds outside my window rn

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - not consciously no? maybe someone i only got briefly introduced to was named that, maybe that bf of a friend’s friend?????? i can’t remember

32. something that gets on your nerves – my dad filing his nails for HOURS on end (ok it’s minutes but sometimes he does it multiple times in an hour and it just.......why)

33. most visited website – tumblr lol

34. hair color – blue!

35. long or short hair – on myself? it’s chin length and sometimes a bit shorter

36. do you have a crush on someone – only if celebrities count, i don’t develop crushes easily and i only ever really had one, are feelings even real

37. what do you like about yourself – my hair! and my ability to make my friends feel loved and cherished!

38. want any piercings? – since i’m allergic to any earrings i never entertained the idea anymore so no

39. blood type – fuck if i know

40. nicknames – anna is already a nickname i suppose

41. relationship status – sehun is my husband idk what to tell you here

42. zodiac - taurus sun, sag moon, cancer rising

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows – exo showtime, free! & yuri on ice, doctor who season 1-4, supernatural 1-3, some kdramas, idk my mind is blanking here

45. tattoos – none and idk if i’m ever gonna be committed enough for them, i love seeing others have or get them though!

46. right or left handed - right handed

47. ever had surgery - yeah but only a light one

48. piercings – used to have my ears pierced but i became allergic

49. sport – used to be in a swim club for 10 yrs and did zumba and step aerobic afterwards oh and i went to horseback riding lessons for a while

50. vacation – yeah i do that a lot lmao and want to do it a whole lot more

51. trainers – do converse count and i have iron man vans

more general

52. eating – idk i love different cuisines esp korean, pasta, cookies and desserts in general

53. drinking – tea and coffee and wine and raspberry mojitos keep me going

54. i’m about to watch – i feel like rewatching all my classics like hp, star wars and lotr

55. waiting for – saturday and my trips to bulgaria/netherlands/berlin

56. want – my exo lightstick to arrive on time for music bank 😬

57. get married - if my partner wants it? but i have no real aspirations for it myself? i never actively think about it at least

58. career – idfk i’m studying asian studies but i guess i’d need something economics like to get somewhere with that for my masters

which is better

59. hugs or kisses – hugs

60. lips or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - i really don’t care but it’s hard to be shorter than me

62. older or younger - depends on the age gap lol

63. nice arms or stomach – arms.......but tummies...........idk i lov both

64. hookup or relationship – relationship

65. troublemaker or hesitant – hesitant

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger – no

67. drank hard liquor – yeah

68. lost glasses – no, though i forgot them once in my host family in china but they sent them via post to the hotel we stayed in next

69. turned someone down – yes 

70. sex on first date – idfk i’d lean towards no though..........

71. broken someone’s heart – yeah probably

72. had your heart broken – no

73. been arrested - no

74. cried when someone died - yeah

75. fallen for a friend - no

do you believe in

76. yourself – sometimes

77. miracles – not really

78. love at first sight – no, attraction at first yes but you cannot love someone that fast

79. santa claus – used to but i caught my mum in the act lol

80. kiss on a first date – yeah why not

81. angels – only if we count sehun as one

other

82. best friend’s name – rina 💖

83. eye color – blue, though it’s more turquoise i guess

84. fave movie – so many, i’m a slut for iron man tho ngl

85. fave actor – is it too cliché for me to say do kyungsoo also rdj and a bunch of others

[embidoesbnharp]

MUN MEME !!

Rules  : answer the questions you’re given, write 11 of your own and tag 11 people.

Tagged by: @ghostlyheropoltergeist Tagging: @silver-strings-of-fate, @myspiritremains​, @my-mechanical-hero​, @lowkeyunhinged​, @quirkless-wonder​, @heroic-wrath​

Questions to answer:

How old were you when you first started writing?

I believe I was like, what, 11? 12? years old when I actually became invested in RPing specifically. Writing? Not entirely sure, maybe 10 if any traces of memories even go that far back.

When and in what fandom were you in when you first started RP?

For the when, it’s answered in question one; but for the latter, I actually wasn’t in any fandom!

On what platform did you first do RP?

People are gonna be so confused, but Youtube, actually, back when they allowed people to host live stream chats for people to check out videos together.

What are some alternate or other muses you’ve written in the past, or are still writing now in another place? If there are none, then who do you wish you had a muse for?

I have so many fandomless OC’s who are now collecting dust in the box, including muses (now-turned-to-their-own-OC’s) from Summon Night: Twin Age -- Millisar, Nassau, Ticah and Ayn -- as well as a few Digimon muses.

If you were to write a book, then what do you think it might be about? If you have no idea, list a story concept you’ve seen in another book or thing you like!

There was definitely a story -- or at least a world I wanted to build upon -- which derived from my dreams. It was a dream on a vast, complex history of some kind of fantasy world, taking place over vast lands some ways from a kingdom that used to be below a sacred floating kingdom in the air, a kingdom where celestial beings used to thrive. I can’t remember the details, but I do know I wrote it down in a word document so if anybody’s interested, I can throw it out there for you guys to read. At one point I tried diving further into it and using it for a romance story, but that never happened.

What cliches get you good, and which ones make you cringe?

Hm good question, I actually can’t think of anything right now, but if I do remember any I’ll prob come back to this and update my answer.

Do you believe in equality over all spectrums?

Depends on the subject of ‘what spectrum’. Equality, individuality, liberalism -- there’s a level of agreement for all of them but only up to a particular degree.

What do you think would be elements of a good dystopian world?

Maybe at least one output in which a person can escape to so they can release their individuality in. Like a special... personal... cube they can dive into, idfk. Individuality is a very important aspect to me.

Do you think that a utopia can have both freedom of thought and overall peace at the same time?

The only peaceful utopia I can think of is just having a small community where everyone knows each other and stuff but mainly keep to themselves while respecting the other person’s property.

What is something that you wish for with every fiber of your being?

To put it at its simplest form: to suddenly have all of my shit together as a functioning citizen of this butchered-up society of a country I live in so I can get the fuck out of my parents house, live confidently on my own, get it made real good, and finally live together with my boyfriend.

If you could have one object, anything in the world, what would it be? Don’t think too hard about it, just whatever comes to your mind first!

I n f i n i t e M o n e y.

My questions for you:

// tbh i legit cannot think right now, so just use the ones i used

[algebraicant]

SO, since nobody asked,

I’m writing this just in case I want to source and have this information all in one place,

TANACON

just watched the series (1/31/2019) -- late, I know

comments I wanted to respond to but were posted 6+ months ago, so like, old news, who cares/ maybe they’ve since learned the answer and don't need my two cents,

Q: where did the money go???

A: Shane said: veep (the company which sold the tickets) told Good Times (Michael)  that if any problems occurred, they were keeping the ticket sales (MANY problems occurred) and that Good Times would be responsible for refunding ticket sales (325,000)

Q: (moreso a wrong assumption) Tana and Good Times knew the capacity was set to 1,200! they knew they were selling 4,000 extra tickets and that those people would never get inside!! scam scam scam!

A: Short answer? No.

Long answer? Buckle your seat belts:

No. The capacity was 1,200-- number one, that’s sort of a technicality. That number is for fire safety reasons, and buildings/rooms/etc have to have a capacity (that is determined by guidelines to which idc enough about the specifics to look up rn-- maybe there's a person per square foot ratio idfk it doesn’t matter) in case of a fire emergency,, it's a preventative measure to minimize the chance of a stampede resulting in injury/death. SO, that being said, you CAN fit more people into a room then the stated capacity of the room.

Now you might be thinking: even so, not 4,000 EXTRA PEOPLE. Yes, that is definitely true.

BUT, CONs are not like, say, a ballet/play theater, or movie theaters, etc, where there is a certain number of seats and there’s one person per seat, no more (and hopefully no less), you sit, you watch, you leave. Events like CONs account for foot traffic and the constant cycling of people. 

You come in, you walk around, you see X, Y, and Z, and you leave. If the event has expensive food/drink, you may leave to get cheaper options (if the event allows you to leave and re-enter, anyway). The point is, people are coming and going throughout the day, so that allows for others to replace them.

I assume the event creator(s) of TANACON believed there would be higher turn-around than there was.

Still, that being said, 4,000 people was WAY too many extra tickets sold. There was no possible way that there would be 1,000 people coming in for 40 minutes to an hour, and then leaving to allow for the next batch of people. Even accounting for the different arrival times-- some people coming at/before the CON started, people coming closer to noon after a late start-- it's utterly impossible.

In saying that, you might think: How could someone make such a careless mistake?

Keep in mind, THIS PROBLEM HAPPENED AT VIDCON IN 2014:

“VidCon 2014 was held at the Anaheim Convention Center, and 18,000 people showed up for the sold-out get-together for those who love online video.

But getting inside to see their favorite YouTubers has some people complaining about long lines.

One woman and her family say they waited two hours, only to have security cut them off in line before she could get an autograph with her favorite online creators.

On VidCon's Facebook page they do say they cannot guarantee that everyone will have one-on-one time with their favorite creators.

Hank Green, co-creator of VidCon, says they tried to make access as fair as possible, but the demand for signings was higher than expected, with fans camping out.

"We ended up in a situation this year which we should have anticipated, but didn't, that basically we had to queue people up before the queues," said Green.”

etc etc

https://abc7.com/news/fans-wait-in-long-lines-for-hours-at-vidcon/145838/

NOTE: wiki says 12,000 people bought tickets in 2013, and the attendance was increasing every year, but there is no official count on wiki for 2014-- probably because they FUCKED UP and oversold by way too many.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VidCon

The Anaheim Convention Center, where VIDCON was held, has a capacity of 7,000-7,500 people inside. The outside area fits 5,500 people.

Together, the convention center fits 13,000 people inside and out.

VIDCON oversold by 5,000 (18,000-13,000).

ALSO

KEEP IN MIND, that means 10,500 people were outside of the actual convention center (18,000-7,500). These 10,500 people were, instead, either in the outside area (5,500) or in the parking lot waiting to get in (5000).

NOTE: I’m not taking into account the fact that, as I previously stated, the capacity number is just an approximate, and that more people might have actually been let inside, despite the capacity limit. That is because I simply can’t calculate the number extra people that security allowed in past the capacity number (as far as I can tell, that information isn’t public knowledge, IF they even kept count). But for our purposes, even if I speculate, and allow for, maybe 1,000 extra people, that’s still 9,500 people NOT in the venue.

SO THE SAME THING HAPPENED

So, what’s the difference (if any)?

1. VIDCON was already established. VIDCON had existed since 2010 (3 successful years prior to the 2014 VIDCON)

2. VIDCON had already been held at the Anaheim Convention Center the year prior.

Is that good for VIDCON?

yes?

Because VIDCON had been established for 3 years, with 1 year at that particular venue, people, presumably, knew they’d be waiting in line for at least 30 minutes, and maybe several hours. People knew to check the weather, bring sunscreen, water, snacks, a board game, pool noodles, WHATEVER they needed while waiting. (I’m sure some people didn’t plan, but you can’t account for every stupid person in the world, otherwise, you’d work/worry yourself to death. If they didn’t bring water, they could leave, or die of dehydration at that point. Sometimes Darwinism works itself out, what can I say-- I’M KIDDING. Sort of.)

no?

Since they went from 12,000 (which presumably worked) to 18,000 in one year’s time without changing venues/ adding venues, or changing visitor passes (limiting access/time spent at the venue) they royally fucked up. If 12,000 people works for you, you don’t just add 5,000 extra people to the list. Especially knowing only 7,500 people fit inside the center, and 13,000 people fit total. If you want to push it to 13,000... fine. Don’t go 4,000 over (COUGH COUGH, TANACON 2K18).

but, yes?

Because the Green Brother’s apologized (sort of-- they did the “i’m sorry you feel that way” non-apology, apology type shit) and took responsibility and came out with public statements explaining what the issues were and set a fixed limit of people the next year, 2015, (”Next year I think is going to be significantly different in how we handle [things]”)  they were able to calm some of the ruffled feathers.

Also, because they had 3 successful years under their belt, they already had a following/ people who trusted them. They also had 3 years of success as proof that their trust was earned, so it was easier for them to say “sorry! this was a blip! a mistake! we promise it will never happen again, just remember the good times, we'll be back to that level of success next year,” and have people believe them.

NOW, compare that to TANACON

1. TANACON was suggested, then created, over the course of a few months.

This doesn’t need further explanation, right? Like, a convention that’s supposed to have food/drink/security/merch/meet-and-greets etc. and FIVE THOUSAND PEOPLE can’t be planned in a few months.

2. Expectations were set too high.

VIDCON already existed, so there was a bar in place. If TANACON wasn’t as good as (or at least close to) VIDCON standards, people were going to bitch. But, instead, it just failed completely, so...

3. Tana wanted revenge on VIDCON. TANACON was a byproduct of that.

So, wrong motives-- already a bad start. She is young, unlike the Green brothers, inexperienced, naive, impulsive, and often, in the past, not held accountable for her mistakes, so she’s got a slight god-complex? possibly? or at the very least, she’s cocky and irresponsible. But, I mean, she was 19/20 at the time, right? Who isn’t a bit cocky and irresponsible at that age (maybe not Tana-level, but still).

I honestly partly blame the ticket buyers (and their parents) for, not one moment, pausing to think: I WATCH Tana’s videos-- part of her appeal (?) is that she’s a fucking mess. That’s what her “Story Time” videos ARE. HER CONSTANTLY GETTING INTO PRECARIOUS SITUATIONS. HAVE SOME FORSIGHT PEOPLE. Also, you saw the video where the TANACON idea was conceived right? You KNEW AHEAD OF TIME this was the result of revenge. When do revenge schemes ever go to plan? Again, HAVE SOME FORESIGHT PEOPLE.

4. Tana and Michael are both early 20′s. And I mean EARLY 20′s.

Tana was 20, so even if this wasn’t made out of revenge, and she wasn’t as much of a mess as she IS, you still should be considering the PROS and CONS of relying on a child.

(For reference, I’m 22. I would never trust myself, or another person my age-- Tana 20, Michael 21-- to be able to successfully plan and execute something of this size. A fan meet-and-greet at Starbucks? MAAAYBE.)

When people go into business with young people/ people who have no experience in the field because they “believe in them” or “trusted them,” is it partly their fault? If you ASSUME that because VIDCON is an established convention that, besides 2014 when they learned their lesson, has been extremely successful, that TANACON will be? That’s your oversight. If you’re pouring your faith and money into a business just because they seem trustful, with nothing to back it up? No past experience? No proof of responsibility in the past? I’m sorry, but that’s your bad. Or worse, you don’t even consider whether it should be trusted at all? You have just always dreamed of meeting youtubers X, Y, Z, and so you jumped without actually considering the consequences, the risk vs reward? Again, that’s your fault. 

While your ticket money might eventually get refunded, you still wasted the time (missing work/school/etc) standing in a hot parking lot or a mess of a venue, as well as travel costs you’ll never get back (unless someone pays you back out of guilt-provoked charity), and, I’m sure, a bunch of other shitty experiences. HAVE SOME FORESIGHT.

The only good thing to come out of TANACON is, maybe, you’ll know not to blindly trust some teenaged stranger from the internet (and hopefully be able to apply your new-found caution to other situations as well) in the future.

Tana could have easily found the same information as I did about the VIDCON fuck up of 2k14 and

1. Pointed fingers. “IT’S NOT JUST ME, NOBODY’S PERFECT.”

2. Learned from their mistakes and not repeat them.

I’m aware that: Shoulda, coulda, woulda.

Pointing fingers probably would’ve made the situation more polarized, aka, 1/2 her viewers (the vast majority being people who did not go to TANACON and live through the disappointment) would say “she’s right. VIDCON fucked up too in the past. Sure, she fucked up, but nobody’s perfect. Accidents happen” and 1/2 her viewers (the vast majority being people who did go to TANACON and lived through the disappointment) would say “Tana’s a cunt trying to divert the attention of her huge fuck up onto VIDCON again by making excuses!”

So, the situation really wouldn’t have gotten any better as a result.

and

There’s no point in going down that rabbit hole. She didn’t do the research. She was fueled by revenge and was naive enough to believe Michael, a boy one year older than her, could handle everything simply because he said he could (spoiler: he couldn’t).

It happened. It's over. Nobody died. Nobody got seriously injured.

I feel sorry for the people who wasted their money and time at TANACON (especially those who flew from overseas).

I feel sorry for Tana because she didn’t want TANACON to be a disaster. Now she has to live with the guilt for ruining a lot of people’s day and the repercussions.

I feel sorry for Michael because he bit off more than he could chew and has to live with the repercussions of his actions.

I feel sorry for all the youtube personalities that agreed to go and the guilt of having their fans be let down.

All you can hope for is that the people learn from this disaster and not repeat it again (although, like I said, this happened at VIDCON four years prior, so who knows-- fingers crossed that, because it was such a huge controversy and people love bringing up how controversial people fucked up in the past, people will actually remember, and it’ll take more than 4 years before something like this happens again??).

#boycottthemarriott #? #stillnotsurewheretheylandedinallthis #scapegoat #?