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#or texting my newer friends im sorry i didnt know them for long and i wish i knew them longer and that i love them too
puppetlooselystrung · 9 months
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ddonggeun · 6 years
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Hey could you help me out for a bit? I basically have a friend that only contact us when she’s in need of emotional support but she always hides her feeling while still being emotional. She then suddenly cut off contact after she met new friend but now she text me again and say she missed us so idk how to reply tho I’m very annoyed and angry
sorry it took me a bit to get back to you i didnt want to rush a reply since your frustration is very valid and i have totally been in your position… i think there two ways to look at it - for sure your friend is shitty and rude its never cool to ditch friends for newer ones and only comes back when they need something from you… its cliche and you probably already heard this a billion times have you and your other friends talk to her about it? be honest! something hey we are kinda annoyed by how you only want to hang with us when your new friends? we are friends not just your free emotion dumping grounds and are they really your friends if they can only share your happiness and glam but not your sadness and stressthe second way is something i learnt it might not work for everyone or every group of friends but i take pride and joy to be the one people trust to pour their feelings to. i know they trust me because im a good listener and that they know i wont tell a soul without their permission they knew ive seen and been through a lot and i could tell them both what they want to hear and what they need to hear… is it stressful for me? of course im very much of a emotion sponge i absorb peoples energy and i worry for others a lot but to me friendship comes in all shapes and sizes some friends i just send a “u dead? no? good… love you am thinking of you” and hang out with once in a long while but we have a good time whenever we catch up, some friends i see regularly over meals and we talk about everything except “deep personal things” we just laugh with at each other forget about real life a bit and carry on with our crazy lives, and some i vent to we might not be the best best friends but sometimes theres just people who understand someone who knows what it feels to be closeted or go to university with dyslexia and adhd or someone who i can just text imma kms fuck this or have existential crisis in their apartment and i know they wont call the police on me because they too need to scream i will end my shit now sometimes to not end their shit… the point is everyone vibes with everyone differently and friendship is somethings thats mutual it need both parties to contribute and enjoy in some friendship it feels more one sided maybe because the other person is currently in a bad space or heck real life just be biting their ass hard but at the end of the day you should be able to say yes that person might not be responsive now but i know they trust and respect me… obviously if your shitty friend is currently in distress i dont think confronting them right away would be a good idea but definitely try to talk to her acknowledge some things and establish some boundaries afterwardsi cant stress this enough but remember its also up to you to decide if you want to be supporting them you arent a bad person for taking care of your feelings (in this case frustration and annoyance) first shoot them a text explaining how you feel about them and maybe its good if we both cool down a bit first? if she is a real friend she would understand and do something either now or later…. either way im sending all my good vibes to you i hope things will work in your favour
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irlcringekin · 7 years
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Callout post: @toroidion @fckhand @mashcores @googledocz @1cm3 @tcnno @tarnmas @p976 @p15s @harmacysts tons of other urls-- SEXUALLY HARASSES AND ASSAULTS OTHER MINORS!!!
I apologize so much for posting this into fandom tags but he’s a Transformers fandom blogger and everyone needs to watch out. First off,
Here’s a list of shit this callout post covers:
him literally SEXUALLY ASSAULTING and SEXUALLY HARASSING MINORS.
him forcing nsfw/kink onto both MINORS and adults.
him being very emotionally manipulative (guilt tripping, threatening suicide to force people to be friends with him, etc.)
SO TW FOR ALL OF THAT.
Here are his blogs:
@38 (current url!!!)
@fckhand  (he goes back to this url a lot)
@googledocz  (past url)
@8752  (previous url)
@1cm3
@tcnno (a previous url)
@tarnmas (a previous url)
@roughbf (some sort of active sideblog)
@ctdc (an old tfkin group chat he had -- this is where he’s proved to harass people the most!!)
@pcrv (old URL - still online) 
@p15s (old URL - still online)
@skrnr (old blog - recently taken by the Woody Collectives)
@breakpng-remade (an old blog when he used to ID as Breakdown)
@harmkin (an old blog he used to stalk people on to send them n.s.f.w)
Past URLs:
toroidion
incelreaper
magistream
oddcorn
harmacysts
harmacysts-remade
ctnet
cybertronnet
breakdovvn
breakpng
skrnr
soliqsnake
paralons
Names he goes by to watch out for:
Pharma
Para / Paralon
Docs
Griev
Grim
Ten
Break(down)
He’s a minor himself but that does NOT excuse him from literally sexually assaulting other minors and putting them in danger within multiple group chats.
Please PLEASE PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU CAN!
Note: some people in this post are kin with certain characters. If someone is using a character name, it’s because of that. Don’t attack them about this.
Note: those whose names/urls/etc. are not censored gave FULL PERMISSION to be included and not censored in this post.
Note: again, this person is indeed a minor too (which doesn’t excuse him at all) but please do not harass him. Block him and spread the word to protect other minors!
He sexually assaults other minors:
It’s been my personal experience of being with him in group chats that many times he has just been asked to stop talking nsfw/kink because he’s a minor or it just made people/other minors uncomfortable. However, most of the time, he either refused or said he’d stop... only to continue. That’s all I’ve experienced. This obviously isn’t enough to warrant a callout post, however...
HE HAS RECENTLY WENT SO FAR AS TO MASTURBATE WHILE ON CALL WITH A MINOR (15) WHO WAS TOO FUCKING SCARED TO TELL HIM TO STOP.
I’ve been given permission by the person he assaulted to say who they are: it was @t4ilgate he assaulted.
It started off with someone messaging me about it:
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Note that @/harmacysts aka @fckhand (now @toroidion) fakes being a system in order to get out of most of the shit he starts. Ie. “oh my other alter did that, not me, so I can’t take responsibility for my actions!”
I later got proof of his sexual assault and harassment on a tumblr user by the URL of @t4ilgate (again, permission was given to make their url public):
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JUST BECAUSE THIS PERSON DIDNT SAY NO AND FELT PRESSURED INTO IT, DOESNT MEAN ITS OK. THIS WAS FORCED UPON THEM. THEY LITERALLY SAY THAT THEY DIDNT SAY NO BECAUSE THEY WERE TOO FUCKING SCARED TO SPEAK UP.
He later tried to defend them not speaking up as them “giving consent”:
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“They should not have given me the slightest consent if they didn’t want it” SILENCE AND FEAR IS NOT CONSENT.
“i gave them the option to say no multiple times” THEY WERE TOO SCARED OF YOU TO SAY NO. ALSO ACCORDING TO THEM,
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YOU DIDNT AT ALL.
“I’m genuinely trying to get better” YOU WOULDNT FORCE NSFW/KINKS AND YOURSELF ONTO OTHER MINORS IF YOU ACTUALLY WERE.
And here it is CONFIRMED that they were pressured and scared/forced into this shit:
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[ @/t4ilgate: i really tried to hint at trying to make things slow down when he started getting too sexual with me. he just kept asking and asking me until i just felt really pressured to just agree. he really took advantage of me, especially since i had something really similar like this happen before, i was distressed abt upsetting him. he kept asking me over and over how i was feeling, and asking me if i knew what he was feeling and doing. he kept insisting that i should be blunt whenever he did.
(name redacted): god - im so sorry you had to go through that ]
Again allow me to emphasize:
“he just kept asking and asking me until i just felt really pressured to just agree. he really took advantage of me, especially since i had something really similar like this happen before, i was distressed abt upsetting him.”
And in response to his “public apology”:
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[ @/t4ilgate: HAHAHAHA W O W OK THEN - 'consent' oh, you mean, constantly badgering me until my 'i dont know, im not sure' turns into '....ok' - 70% of the call was spent doing sexual activities he spent so long trying to convince me to do. - get fucked. ]
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HE DID THIS WITHOUT CONSENT AND EXCUSED EVERYTHING WITH “but... [after i intensely pressured and forced them into it] they barely said ok so it’s consensual!”
BADGERING SOMEONE UNTIL THEY GIVE IN IS NOT CONSENT. YOU ARE A FUCKING SEXUAL ASSAULTER AND YOU’VE POTENTIALLY TRAUMATIZED A MINOR FOR YOUR OWN SEXUAL GRATIFICATION.
I hope you have fun living with this knowledge for the rest of your life.
--
And here’s him being asked to leave, saying he’s “so sorry” for sexually assaulting someone, (note: the person telling him to leave says that he’s done this to MULTIPLE PEOPLE SO HE IS A REPEATED OFFENDER AND DANGER):
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As you can see, him asking “are you sure you want me to leave [after sexually assaulting a member of your chat]” outright shows that he’s not even considerate of how others feel LET ALONE THE PERSON HE ASSAULTED. He asks after sexually assaulting someone if they really want him to leave. Which, no shit asshole who WOULDNT want you to leave.
As a trauma survivor myself, this utterly disgusts me that this person @/harmacysts aka @fckhand (now @38) who is also the owner of @/ctnet would go so far as to WILLINGLY TRAUMATIZE ANOTHER MINOR FOR SEXUAL GRATIFICATION.
That’s cocsa even if it’s not physical or in-person, it’s still a form of sexual assault and harassment and I feel so fucking bad for the person (people?) he’s sexually harassed.
It gets worse!!!!
HE ALSO MADE A BLOG ABOUT THIS POOR MINOR AND HIS SEXUAL FANTASIES ABOUT THEM AND HARASSED THEM ON THERE TOO
Apparently this has happened BEFORE with other people as well many times:
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[@/t4ilgate: -and really sexually affectionate, but i never knew he’d do that w/out asking me first - YEAH - like he even made a nsfw vent blog to talk about him lusting over me and just feels so bad and wrong i hate it i hate it
(name redacted): he did that to us too
@/t4ilgate: the url used to be harmkin - seriously???
(name redacted): he used to have a blog called fakegimmick and he’d vague about wanting to fuck us (all 17+ year olds) all the time
@/t4ilgate: that’s so fucking sick holy shit i never knew
(name redacted): and he’d even send us the links to the shit he’d vague - it was so fucking uncomfortable - he even made fun of sex-repulsion]
Him making nsfw blogs to literally stalk and harass other minors sexually and to talk about them sexually is fucking creepy. He was asked to stop multiple times but DID NOT EVER STOP. This is harassment, this is cocsa, and this is disgusting.
If that wasn’t enough, then here’s more of what he’s done:
UPDATE!! -- his new url has changed to @38 !
@tcnno used to be a previous url (proof):
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[ like… i know ive been denying everything this whole time but… the person that was called out is in our system. im a newer host. i tried to get away from the whole thing because im a coward but that’s irrelevant. the point is that im letting go of my role as host and Pharma is taking that. if anyone is uncomfortable just leave the server its all fine. i doubt im going dormant but we’ll see. im really sorry i have to do this everything is too much for me to handle right now.
if anyone wants anything cleared out just ask. pharma is here with me so he can ask questions as well.
by the way feel free to screenshot that because im not hiding anymore.
oh and if you dont know whats going on just… ((link to the callout against him)) yeah. he doesnt do that kind of shit anymore and is getting better but still if anyone is uncomfortable, feel free to cut contact ] --- source (tcnno)
please note that he has excused his manipulative and abusive behavior and even the fact that he has sexually harassed a minor with his “system” and “headmates” before!!!!!
He has said MANY TIMES that he has “changed”!!
this is normal manipulative behavior for him. please do not fall for it! he is STILL VERY MUCH A DANGER!!
and he’s since then moved to @1cm3 as stated on his blog:
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and from this blog you can find a url trail from 1cm3 to @incelreaper and then back to the old @fckhand and over to @arknights  and over to @mashcores and then to @googledocz where he deleted most of his content and then to 8752 where he seems to go back to the url @fckhand a lot where he admitted he was googledocz. he is now @38
UPDATE: HE JOKES ABOUT SEXUALLY HARASSING PEOPLE AND ADMITS HE DOESNT FEEL BAD ABOUT WHAT HE DID!
I guess he saw the callout post and all he did was make jokes about it and thus him sexually harassing people:
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and then even say he “feels bad but also not”:
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He forces nsfw/kink onto both other minors and adults:
Many people have come to me telling me that in all of the group chats he runs and/or is in, he has tried to force nsfw/kink shit onto minors MANY TIMES.
The below pictures in this next part include him going so far as to force nsfw/kink onto his old ex datemate. He’s went so far as to completely ignore their boundaries and they make commentary here and there about how scared they were (tw for vaguely nsfw implied text - but nothing outright nsfw):
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[ @/harmacysts: we still have that thing you suggested - we should do that eventually.
--- A note from his ex who we’ll call “Tracer”: I didn’t suggest it. ]
===
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[ @/harmacysts: well i just remembered a thing from our past and im-
“Tracer”: ???????
Harmacysts: try to guess
---  A note from his ex: here im playing along bc im too scared to do anything else ]
===
and here is where his ex datemate tried to LEAVE THE SITUATION but he kept forcing it further:
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Nothing is outwardly nsfw but his ex is clearly very VERY uncomfortable and tries to literally escape the situations he puts them in MULTIPLE TIMES to the point where they feel SCARED of him.
There were also a few other instances of him forcing nsfw/kink onto people:
He has posted pictures of himself wearing a collar in a group chat he used to be in. This made a lot of people very uncomfortable as he’s a minor so they had to delete the pic he sent. During the time he was wearing it/sent the pic, he kept talking about how “age regressed” he was and then later on called his age regression “pet regression” (possible fetishization of age regression and trauma?)
After being called out about it, instead of apologizing and trying to make things better, he deleted most of the shit he sent and ran from the situation and left the group chat, unable to take people telling him to stop posting nsfw things.
Most of it was deleted including the picture he posted, but here is where he sent it:
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note: NO ONE told him to send it and NO ONE told him that it was ok to. Here’s proof that they did not encourage him AT ALL and even told him to NOT post it:
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and here’s the aftermath of it where, when being talked to about it and asked to stop in a calm manner, he immediately guilt trips the person telling him to stop:
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[caption:
(Name redacted): I apologize but you didn’t have to leave. All I was asking was for you to not post such things into a chat with adults and - Yeah a few people have also mentioned that it made them incredibly uncomfortable as well as adults. I also don’t understnad the issue with me asking you to not post such things, and for adults to be informed of you being a minor.
Harmacysts: no its just best im not there at all]
However, after that, he once again began to force collars and kink shit onto people DESPITE BEING TOLD TO STOP MULTIPLE TIMES:
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Here’s where people tell him to stop:
Note, these are taken from multiple group chats,
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[ (name redacted): you NEED TO STOP POSTING THIS SHIT its making so many people uncomfortable and youre a MINOR. this isnt an nsfw chat. this is a sfw chat. and even if we did allow nsfw, YOURE A MINOR YOU NEED TO FUCKING STOP OR ELSE WE’RE GOING TO BOOT YOU FOR GOOD, OK? ]
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[ (name redacted): pleasee stop this is really uncomfortable im a minor and i dont wanna see this stuff.... please??? idc if youre a minor too i want you to stop!! ]
He’s made EVERYONE both minors and adults uncomfortable. He forces nsfw/kink shit onto minors. He forces it onto adults too. No matter how much people ask him to stop, he doesn’t.
He’s caused multiple minors harm and has even triggered quite a few of them into panic attacks with his blatant sexual harassment.
I can’t stress it enough that even though he’s a minor himself, THIS IS NOT OK --- LET ALONE THE FACT THAT HE SEXUALLY ASSAULTED ANOTHER MINOR!!
He’s very emotionally manipulative:
Here are some accounts of him emotionally manipulating, guilt tripping, threatening suicide, and even trying to break relationships up out of jealousy.
This will be a mixture of people’s encounters with him and screenshots of what he’s said/done.
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[ (name redacted): one of the only things that made me stay and wait for him to get better was the fact he used to guilt trip me with "i think i would have kms if i hadn't ever met you" which made me feel important but burdened WITH A FUCKING HUMAN LIFE ]
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[ (Name redacted #1): all he said when i once commented about the age difference between his first two relationships i knew of was "i can see why it's not everyone's thing" like................. hey
(Name redacted #2): oh my god
(Name redacted #3): so he perpetuates gross age gaps - also he’s still shoving his nsfw kink talk into minor’s faces - he’s doing it in other group chats
(Name redacted #4): UGh ]
so he advocates and even perpetuates for adult/minor and age-gap relationships.
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a few emotionally manipulative and guilt-trippy things he’s said but nothing too serious to warrant a callout post by itself, but it’s still something to include to show his general behavior:
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(he apparently used to go by this name and icon in a different chat)
EDIT as of 21/01/2018: since then, he has been changing to numerous URLs, FULLY PRETENDING TO BE OTHER PEOPLE, and trying to drag new people into his shit. He’s hurt even more people according to a few sources and STILL tries to excuse his actions with weak apologies and saying that he “has changed and improved”:
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[[ Pharmy boy (aka harmacysts/fckhand -- now @toroidion): yeah ik its really bad but if you need an apology/explanation or something i can provide one? just first off its been 5 months since everything Happened. ive improved a lot since then and i dont condone those types of things at all. it was very stupid of me and i take all the responsibility for it. i mightve been 14 at the time but that doesnt take away how bad it is.  ((continued))--
I am trying my best. So first off yeah I did do sexual things on call with another person when i hadnt been given a proper answer, and i did pressure them into it. I admit that. I didnt mean to hurt them, I genuinely thought it was ok, but now i know better. i do feel very guilty for what i did. ill be more careful in the future and am sure to not repeat the same thing ever again.
then theres me talking about nsfw when people were telling me to stop. obviously thats not a right thing to do either, as everyone was clearly uncomfortable with it. i wont repeat that either, and will look after it myself.
theres also me blaming things on alters, and not taking responsibility for what they mightve done. i dont remember exactly what happened but from now on im sure to take note of what they do and apologize for them.  ((note: he is NOT an actual system, does not have DID, and only started to claim to be one after he got friends who also claimed to be systems))
ive also bee manipulative in the past, and ive taken note of it. i used to guilt trip people and say shit like “no one loves me and youre lying” etc etc but i promise i will not do that again.
the only time i ever did stuff like that was the ones mentioned, i havent done the same before, and neither will i do it again.  ((false: he has done many more things that weren’t documented due to him deleting messages after he was told off or called out))
sorry thats a bit sloppy.
but like. i promise ive improved, and i still am. ill continue to improve from now on as well, you can give me a chance to prove that if you so desire.
bottomtron: sorry but, literally, i cant. my abuser of 3 years that ruined my life was like this and i even physically lived with him. im sure youll get better in time but 5 months isnt long and my gut tells me to just do what i feel is right. so i hope you have a good run in life and you do get better. ]]
however, despite harmacysts/fckhand’s claims, he actually HAS NOT changed and continues to sexually harass and perhaps even groom other minors:
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plus it should be quite obvious that 5 months is barely enough time, especially since there has been little difference in his behaviour.
Small edit as of 2018/07/30 --- fckhand (now @38) proves that he STILL has not changed and does not care about nor respect any of his friends’ decisions to leave him after they find out what he has done.
He has no changed, will not change, and refuses to respect peoples’ decisions even after claiming for ages now that he does. He is lying.
TLDR --- this person @fckhand (now @38) literally sexually harassed another minor under the guise that their silence and fear was consent. He pressured them into it and harmed them. He’s extremely manipulative and toxic and is KNOWN to force nsfw/kink onto other minors. since then, he has been lying and trying to worm his way back into fandoms and people’s lives.
again do not harass him but by all means please reblog this post, block him, and tell others!
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