#people fr thought they were gonna cut her… like be so fucking serious

[dulcewrites]

alys rivers casting has started omg I used to pray for times like this fr! [insert oprah jumping up cheering and then crying gif] we beat the alys rivers being scrapped for helaemond allegations 😭

Thinking about the people who came into my inbox fighting for their lives about alys being evil (sending Aemond to his death for fun) or her trying to seducing whatever targaryen she could find (daemon included)… just for them to use a script that has alys being a funny healer who makes fun of daemon TO HIS FACE

That’s MOTHER

[antiyourwokehomophobia2]

Me ranting about a book below the cut but I just need to get this off my chest

Honestly, I hated that ending so fucking much. It's honestly so fucking impressive how the author was able to ruin two books worth of stuff in one single sentence at the end. I can't believe that she'd allow the two of them to take on other lovers. The MC went a full century without touching anyone else. She waited for her lover to awaken and yet??? I feel like the two of them just should not have gotten together if they were just gonna??? Break up, fuck other people for a hundred years, and then get back together? How on earth is that love? How on earth is that "fated"?

"Hey, I'm totally cool with you being miles away from me even though you genuinely do not have to be. Not only that, but I'm totally cool with both of us fucking a multitude of other people for literally a hundred years. After we're done with our hundred year escapade of not being loyal to each other, why don't we get back together?"

Fucking insane. That's your retelling? That's your happy ending?? What self respecting person would allow someone to put them on the back burner for 100 years? It's not like their love wasn't confessed. They admitted to loving each other. Or loving each other once, at least. So? Either end it or be faithful? Who the fuck allows themselves to be a "hmm... I'm gonna sample everyone else first and come back to you when I feel like it" for fucking 100 years? Is that really love prevailing? Is that really true love? And what on earth was with all that ambiguous sexuality bullshit? I'm going to kill someone.

Y'all, I am being so fucking serious when I say the ending of this book influenced by writing and my drive to be a writer in a way that literally nothing else has. This book had me in shambles. I can't think about it too long. I cried for days after. Just the thought of the line "Alyce, come home" can send me into turmoil fr. God, I fucking hate lesbian books. I'm never reading one again.

[et-cant-phone-home-no-signal]

The Last of Us HBO - Episode 1 thoughts

Warning: Pure yapping ahead, just my thoughts and things I've noticed whilst watching, it's not serious and I don't invite arguments (fellow yappers however are more than welcome)

(these make sense in the way that i wrote this as i watched so it's all chronological, this is my bday gift to all of you lol. spoilers under the cut)

Love the opening, gives a lot of the context you'd get from the opening credits of the game in a way that's easy to follow and understand for a new audience (using my mum as an example, she knows nothing about this show other than me telling her it's a zombie show - her only experience with that is the walking dead vaguely so her expectations were mid, but even she told me it's easy to understand and actually makes more sense irl compared to TWD)

The whole pandemic stuff really just hits different after COVID doesn't it

The whole climate change thing mentioned is so real, and I know this is written for modern times by modern writers, but for them to set that idea up in a 60s show is very eye-opening

The silence + stillness of the host and audience, the camera angles chosen, it's so good and unsettling in a very inconspicuous way, bravo

I wonder why they chose to change it from 2013 to 2003. Don't get me wrong I'm okay with it, and it's fun to relate to seeing a bunch of familiar things from my own childhood (lack of smartphones, older decor, easy clothing style etc), but it's a decade difference and I wonder why? Is it to make it more relatable for us that the majority of the show is set in 2023? Are we meant to connect to that more, as we've just had our own pandemic and this is a more intense fallout that we could have had if the nature of COVID had been slightly different? Maybe I'm overthinking it

The details in Sarah's room 👌 the posters, the box TV (such nostalgia), the pictures of her and friends, of her and Joel, ribbons and trophies from winning soccer tournaments, the hung up doodle paper, fairy lights, soft pink walls, it's so comfy and lived in, girly but completely her own space :') reminds me a bit of my childhood bedroom tbh, messy but comfortably so

I love that she knows her dad won't wake up so she knocks and calls because yeah, that's what you do when your dad is a deep sleeper

The contrast with Joel's room immediately after, the details there too - the old boombox cd player, fan up and running, messy dresser with slightly open drawers, the most Texas art on the walls (come on, music, deer and a tacos and beer poster?), blue walls, a hamper filled to the brim, a fucking treadmill?? Joel, your plant on the bedside table is long deceased I'm begging you to chuck it and release it from its misery 💀

(Something my mum noted, was that Sarah is wearing her natural curly hair, which mum said "it's rare to see that, in 2003 at least", to which I replied "maybe not in America?" because fr we are European and there's many cultural differences between the USA and other countries. Mum noticed it and she grew up in the Netherlands as a 60s kid. Me personally, I didn't think too much on it because it didn't click that might be odd to see someone wear natural hair, but I also admit I grew up in small villages and towns in more rural areas of Scotland and the Netherlands, so I didn't see much diversity in people growing up until like high school, but I consumed an insane amount of media such as Doctor Who and that's always been a very diverse show. Anyway, just a little thing that was noticed, I love Sarah's hair)

The domesticity :') Joel forgetting the pancake mix (good thing too), going straight for coffee, Sarah insisting on orange juice, his utter disgust at drinking it

"Gonna have to wear diapers soon." "Who says I don't already?" 💀

IS THAT DIDO PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND??? ULTIMATE WIN (I fucking love Dido, the song playing is White Flag)

"Shell." "Calcium." *pushes egg through teeth* "Lovely." stop it oh my god

Family banter, I'm eating this shit up so bad y'all, uncle Tommy <3

The Jakarta detail 👌👌

Pedro with a Texan accent is mwah

I like the detail of Sarah's name being on her bag, I had the same as a kid but my mum would sew it into the top of my bag instead, sometimes on the outside sometimes on the inside. I feel like that's not a safe thing to do anymore but it was so normal when I was a kid

Wish I could write an essay on Joel's drawer but instead I'll just say I love that Sarah is comfortable enough at home to just, go into her dad's room and grab stuff from his dresser, and know Joel won't be mad about it :) healthy home relationship

I wonder if the knife has any crazy significance? I don't remember seeing that knife ever again, unless it's just foreshadowing to Ellie's knife

I swear, them constantly avoiding baked goods is so genius (no pancakes, no cake, no biscuits, they don't eat the cookies later, it's small and clever)

Joel throwing Sarah under the bus like that to the neighbours had both me and mum cackling

Joel "no smoking in the truck" Miller

The desert storm detail is an interesting addition to Tommy's character, and at this stage, it's open whether this is about Joel or Tommy since we don't know who's truck it is (just because Tommy is driving doesn't mean it's his, after all, Joel has a garage)

The details in the school are fun, but idk if that's a normal American school thing to have pictures of the presidents and founding father up or not, I honestly will assume it is since there's also a big ass USA flag in the corner

THE PAPERMATE INKJOY PEN!!! I USED TO HAVE THOSE!!! Damn the small details are so fucking popping

This part is wonderful - where the fuck did they source that many different and fun clocks from and where can I get them?

"20." "That's it?" "Okay, 30." "20's good."

The build up is fantastic, it works for fans and for newcomers alike - all these things like the police all day and other things previously mentioned, the lady ushering her out as quickly as possible, all the people that were outside eating and enjoying the food stands are suddenly gone and the street is silent

The whole Jesus spiel, good lord, feels very Texas in the 2000s (and still tbh, let's be real)

Sarah's face when Mrs Adler says "raisin" is SUCH a fat mood my god this kid is funny

Nanna no 💀 (that fucking grandma is FREAKY as FUCK, outstanding detail)

Mercy knows. Animals always know.

Thank god Joel forgot the cake

Pedros funny little facial expression absolutely kill me, adds such dimension to Joel as a father

Super satisfying to hear the game dialogue ngl, especially that funny little bit with the watch

It's so interesting to see Joel has always struggled with his emotions and verbalising them - the small "thank you", not looking at her, rather looking down at the watch itself, fiddling with it - he's trying but he's never been good with feelings

Joel SNATCHING that dvd like, damn son, it's not going anywhere 😭😂 it's cute to see him so excited about it though, Sarah knows what he likes, even if she's not interested in it at all

The instant sofa snuggle :')

"Don't fall asleep." "Of course I won't, it's too riveting." *Cuts to Sarah fast asleep*

The phone 💀 I remember us having a phone like that, whole ass protection sleeve and all

This extra detail of Joel having to bail Tommy out just adds so much more depth to the dynamic and I'm here for it, also explains why the fuck Joel wasn't in the house at 2am (that always bothered me a bit about the game)

Joel loves his daughter so much,,,, the gentle way he puts her in bed, shoes and all, covering her up with her blanket, little kiss on the head,,,,, I'm already in pain for what's to come

Mercy my sweet baby <3 what a good dog, so scared :(

The show really captured that out of sync feeling when something like this happens - nothing crazy yet, just utter confusion and mild panic creeping in because this isn't normal but nothing seems to be happening yet

Mercy said "peace ✌️ I'm out"

This girl is braver than me, I wouldn't have walked through the door - but that being said I haven't had close neighbours like this in years so maybe it's just that they're very close and she feels comfortable doing so

Oh that's fucked UP dude, Sarah downright walking into cannibal town that's so disturbing (fantastic acting and special effects all around)

The cordyceps special effects are so fucking visceral and disgusting, that out of the mouth?? Grim!! Love how they did this

Love the amount of game dialogue and referencing we get in this particular part - "You take 71-" "71, I know.", the whole car conversation, "That's Jimmy's place" (I know in the game Jimmy is the neighbour and it's Louis'farm that's on fire but the reference stands), most of the camera work being fixed on Sarah or from Sarah's perspective in the back, "They got a kid Joel." "So do we, keep driving. Somebody else'll come along.", just a fucking well done scene tbh

This whole part in the car from Sarah's POV absolutely invokes the same anxiety I felt when playing this bit of the game, totally made me feel like I'm in the truck with them and it's scary (scary good)

I was so thrown off by the fact that they avoided the car crash that I wasn't expecting the alternative that they chose instead 💀 like shit??? A whole ass plane??? Love that they did the eerie music to black thing though that was great

Nico honestly just stole my whole heart as Sarah she got all the fucking expressions down, the panic, the way she talks, the pained sounds, love it 10/10 casting imo

The instant reaction time on Joel and getting Sarah out of the way of that car was NUTS like, I rewatched that part multiple times just to see how quickly he switched them around goddamn

Pedro and Nico are a fantastic father daughter duo 👌

Joel pushing Sarah's head under his chin more so she doesn't look 🥺

The infected actors are fucking amazing, terrifying dedication to the role

Oh no I'm about to cry so hard guys

Sarah 😭😭😭 her whimpers make me so fucking upset this scene is so fucking sad

On a genuine note, Nico did an outstanding job of channeling the desperation from the game, and so did Pedro and Gabriel - Tommy's choked up "Joel" and look of utter defeat and grief is absolutely heartbreaking

Joel holding his dead daughter in his arms, rocking her like a baby, crying out for her to please please be okay...... Yeah

The set for the front of the Boston QZ 🙌

It's so telling that the first thing we see FEDRA do is lie to a child and kill her when they promised she was gonna be okay. They promised they were gonna feed her and get her toys, and that the medicine would help her. They told her that she was safe. And they killed her.

Having Joel be the one to throw her into the fire, holding her the same way he held Sarah, was such poignant choice - how a man can change over 20 years

The Boston details - the set itself, the extras, the shoelaces for ration cards, the covering up of the firefly logo, the sheer amount of FEDRA guards everywhere

Ah yes, the return of public hangings, my favourite 🫠

Interesting to see Joel "smuggler and dealer" Miller, something we didn't get much of in the game tbh

Tess <3

Robert is so slimy eugh

I love that we get to see more of Tess outside of her and Joel, it builds more of a picture of who she is besides just Joel's smuggle partner - also love the amazing bruise makeup they did for her, looks super real and painful

The fireflies actively causing mayhem in the QZ is also a great added detail! We see it a bit in game but I enjoy the constant references to it as well

Bella as Ellie is god tier damn they're so good - snarky as FUCK

Joel just, skipping the fucking line without giving a shit, no one stopping him

"When I'm sleeping, Gabriela listens, or my son. The smart one, not the other one, god bless him." 💀😂😭

I love that Joel has a secret stash in his apartment

Ah yes, drugs and alcohol, the remedy to all

The watch 😭

Liking the music and camera usage in this scene, makes me feel like I'm high myself

Tess just coming in, scooting Joel over in bed and being the big spoon 🙌 the tender way in which she slides her arm over his waist and he grabs her hand in his 😭

The jarring cut to it being day and him lying down alone, pheww

The way Joel is instantly awake and ready to fucking go when he sees Tess' face 🫠

Enjoy how we get Tess saying how absolutely terrified Robert is of Joel, that he needs to take a breath and go slow, but reassures him she still wants to fuck him up - Tess is handling Joel like an spooked animal, gently and with care

Marlene's casting is fantastic 👌 - JUST CLOCKED THAT THE REASON WHY I FELT THAT IMMEDIATELY IS BECAUSE MERLE VOICED MARLENE IN GAME, NO WONDER I INSTANTLY FELT SHE WAS RIGHT!! I recognised her voice without clocking it

I enjoy the changes made to Marlene from the game, she feels more real here, more brutal, this is a rebellion leader who is aware shit isn't going well, it's refreshing - we're seeing more of the inner workings of the firefly situation in Boston

I think it's cute that they still have shitty bars and stuff, humans desire connection and community so much they'll make the best out of whatever they got

"You tell me to 'look for the light' and I'll break your jaw." SLAY LOL

This insight into Ellie's treatment and her relationship with Marlene is really interesting - it's more context which I always enjoy

"You my fucking mom or something?" "Do I look like your mom?" "Nooo, you do not." 😂

First Riley mention, time to feel sad!

With more thought, the "he's here" is probably about Robert! Didn't think much on that before

Detail notice - love how hair and makeup department did Tess and Joel's graying hairs, it looks really good and natural. I read some comments ages ago that Joel's hair is too silver in some spots, but I raise to you my mum in defence, who went grey quite early (she started in her late 30s) and has beautiful silver highlights naturally between the darker hairs. If my mum ever finds out I've posted that online, she'll probably kill me, but then she shouldn't have genetically given me her terrible eyesight 😌 consider it retaliation

The wall body is so grotesque and beautiful, it reminds me a bit of Annihilation (if you haven't seen that movie, I recommend! Fantastic music and visual effects)

*Joel rambles about the building structure* "This has been 'Construction Corner' with Joel Miller." got me creasing lmao they're so snarky and funny

Man I wonder wtf happened, like, did Robert try to scam them so bad they had a shootout?? Crazy

"So this is who Robert screwed us over with? The Che Guevara of Boston?" tells me everything I need to know about Marlene

The shootout stance oooooohhsggsg

Kim and her missing ear 💀

I like the way they get the Ellie job in the show, it works really well

"Really? That fast?" crying lmao

There's clearly more history between Tommy, Marlene and Joel and I know it's because Tommy was a firefly but man what I wouldn't give for a series on the 20 years between this and 2003!!! I'd play a whole game of that!!! I wanna know what happened, in detail!!

Something that bothers me: they're soaked, their shoes are squelching, yet the floor is bone dry after they walk in 😭

I love how smart and inquisitive Ellie is, all the small things she notices and picks up on

Love the same dialogue but different way of delivering it from the game, refreshing as fuck

Ellie's a sassy little shit ain't she (I love her)

I find it constantly funny that cars and shit are still used after 20 years because y'all, gasoline has a shelf life of like 3-6 months and diesel about a year if they're stored correctly with stabilisers, so, why are vehicles used so much?? Where are they getting their gasoline from?? Yes I am aware you can make bio-gas out of plants but it's a complicated process and do you really think FEDRA is out here with greenhouses for gasoline? No me neither

Tess is actually so fucking lovely in regards to Ellie, like, mom mode detected - also love how it's Tess that takes the lead

I can feel my own back protesting at seeing them squat walk, yikes

Ellie gripping Tess' hand for support 😭💕

Joel's flashback due to the light - him beating that guy to fucking death because he's already lost one daughter to a soldier before, and he may not even like Ellie yet but he'll be damned if he lets another little girl die at the barrel of a gun like that

Ellie's face, like she wants to be scared of Joel but shit, that guy just killed a FEDRA soldier to protect her and you can see the admiration in her eyes, but the fear is there too

The radio at the end - we know Bill and Frank aren't alright but at this stage we don't know what exactly that means

The final shot of the iconic towers at the end, an infected screaming on the roof - fucking poetry

If you made it to the end, thanks for reading!! It's literally just my running thought process whilst watching!! Do you agree with some of my notes, was there anything you noticed that i didn't? Comments and reblogs welcome <3

Episode 2 thoughts:

Episode 3 thoughts:

[licenselesswriter]

Ten Duel Commandments CH5

Duel Before The Sun is in the Sky

Friday, January 24, 2020

Maya wasn't the one who always remember the dates of important things, and even with her particular situation, she knew that he knew that today was their one-year anniversary. And that's why her relaxed posture gave one peaceful message, but her eyes wanted to kill him.

Lucas looks at his teammate, feeling for a second that he was in danger, "Sorry, Alex, but today, I have a date," he suddenly confesses.

Zay, surprised, looks at Maya, who was dumbfounded just like him.

Alex looks at him with a sincere smile, "Ohhh, Friar is back in the game? Good for you," he congratulates him, "Sadly, you're gonna make a lot of people mad at you," he adds.

Lucas looks at Alex, "Really? Why?" he asks.

"Well, we kinda bet on your sex, and dating life," he confesses.

Lucas gives Alex a disappointed look, "That's fantastic, do I want to know more?" he asks.

"Well, I'm, after all the mess you went with blondie there and her brunette friend, still have ten bucks on Missy, and thirty on Chai," he adds, "So please, tell me you're making me richer," he adds.

Lucas looks at him, confused, "I'm sorry, still?" he asks.

"Yeah, the pool says that you're gonna end with Brandon," Alex answers.

"Beg your pardon? Brandon?" Zay interferes.

"He's a line back runner," Alex explains, "Also good grades, and looks like Friar here love smart partners," he adds.

"He's right about that," Lucas says to Zay before giving Maya a fast glance.

"Excuse you," Zay says at him, "I'm Lucas's best friend. I've known him the longest. He got kicked out of school in Texas for me," he adds before facing Lucas, "My friend, if I wanted, I would rock your fucking world," he states, looking at his best friend directly into his eyes.

"Could you be any gayer?" Lucas asks his best friend.

"For God's sake, stop Chandlering me," Zay replies.

Alex looks at both of them, "You might not be gay, but you two are a married couple," he adds, "Ok, now, Friar, tell us who is the pretty lady joining you tonight," he continues.

"Relax, I'm going out with my Mom. She needs a few things from Bartlett yarns," Lucas lies.

Zay looks at him, "Oh, so in the end, you are gay," he teases him.

"Whatever you say, understudy," Lucas replies, mocking that he took the leading role in the school play last year.

"Asshole," Zay replies.

Alex put his hand on Lucas's shoulder, giving him a pity look, "See? Married couple," he says. 

After their conversation, the bell rings, and they all part ways, Isadora and Maya to History, Lucas and Zay to Spanish.

Once the boys where in the classroom, Zay finally asks, "Were you serious about going out with your mom today?" he asks

"Señor Babineaux, por favor, estamos en clase de español, asi que use español para sus conversaciones con el señor Friar (Mr. Babineaux, please, we're in Spanish class, so, use spanish for your chats with Mr. Friar,)" Señora Feinstein-Chang said to her student. 

"La señora Feinstein-Chang tiene razon mi amigo, estamos en clase de español, usa español por favor (Mrs. Feinstein-Chang is right my friend, we're in Spanish class, use Spanish please,)" Lucas comments on his teacher's words.

Zay looks at Lucas, unamused, "Hijo de (Son of,)" he wanted to say, only to be cut by the teacher.

"Señor Babineaux, si termina esa oracion, tendra un mes de detencion (Mr. Babineaux, if you finish that sentence, you will have one month of detention,)" she treats him.

Zay looks at Lucas, confused.

Lucas smiles, "One-month detention if you finish that sentence," he translates for him.

Zay looks to the ground, "Tu as de la chance que ce soit un cours d'espagnol (You're lucky this is a Spanish course,)" he mutters to Lucas in french.

Lucas chuckles until he felt the glare Mrs. Feinstein-Chang was giving them.

Once their classes ended, Maya walked into Topanga's for the first time since her fight with Riley five months ago, and once she saw her friends there, a pinch of pain and sorrow pierce her heart. Since Farkle's break-up with Isadora, Maya has been refraining herself from putting a foot in places where they are both alone, not because they don't want her with them, but because of the shame she felt for putting Isadora before Farkle.

But this time was different. This time, they call her, they reach first, which was a first for them. Maya looks at Topanga on the counter and gentle waves to her before walking to their friends. Once she was in front of them, she breaks their silence, "Mind if I use this spot?" she asks them.

Riley looks at her like she was a saint, "Please," she softly says.

Maya sits in front of them before looking at Farkle, "How bad are you handling things?" she asks.

Farkle looks at her like he was dead, "How you know I'm handling things bad?" he asks in a depressive tone.

"You were almost at my level of boredom in science. That speaks volumes," Maya answers.

"I've had better days," Farkle softly says, "No idea a break-up can be this messy, and it's only been a month," he adds.

Maya gently put her hand over his friend's hand, "Life is messy, and even when you feel bad right now, take it as new knowledge," she says, trying to comfort him.

Farkle looks back at her, "I doubt I can get anything from this," he replies.

Maya gives him a compassionate look, "At least you get the truth about you," she says, almost letting him know what she knows.

Surprised, Farkle feels the blood rush to his face, "That doesn't make me feel good at all," he replies, looking to the side, avoiding Maya's eyes.

Maya gently put her hand over Farkle's hand and caress it, giving him support, "Trust me, one day, it will," she says.

Riley looks at Maya with a soft smile, "Is that what you learned from my uncle?" she asks.

Maya chuckles, "In a way," she answers.

"Can't wait for you to become my aunt," Riley says, caressing Maya's hand.

Maya takes a deep breath and chuckles again, "We both know that's not gonna happen," she says, "But I like your enthusiasm," Maya adds.

Farkle looks at Riley, like doing some strange math in his head, "Wait, you're seeing someone?" he asks.

Riley immediately turns her head to Farkle, "Come on. She would never hide something like that from us," Riley fastly defends Maya.

Maya felt her stomach drops while her friends debate about her personal life, "Please, if I wanted to hide something, I could, perfectly," she nervously says.

Riley chuckles, "Yeah, maybe for a week, but that's not much," she replies.

Maya looks down, controlling her nerves, "I think I would be able to hide it a bit more than a week," she softly says.

"One month of homework says you can't hide it more than three months," Farkle bets.

Maya looks away from them, 'Boy, how wrong you are now,' she thinks to herself.

.

A few hours later, Maya walks into her apartment, only to find candles and the table already on, "Mom? I'm interrupting something?" she asks, hearing music from the kitchen.

Lucas walks out of her kitchen swaying to the rhythm of the music, "You don't have to say you love me, you don't have to say nothing, you don't have to say you're mine," he sings to Maya alongside the song on the background, "Sorry, not your Mom, different shade of blonde," he adds, before walking back into the kitchen.

"Shouldn't you be with your mom?" Maya asks.

Lucas comes back, this time with a rose on his hand, "Now you know Lucas Friar can lie like a pro," he answers before putting a soft kiss on her lips, "Also, you really thought I would forget our one-year anniversary?" he asks.

Maya looks at him, surprised, "Not gonna lie, you did one hell of a job with that lie, Friar," she says, gently passing her hands around his hips.

"Trust me. I would never forget the day you finally let me kiss you," Lucas replies, gently giving her the rose before kissing her again.

"What can I say? An elaborate lie, candlelight dinner, a rose, and a Harry Styles song, you bring your A-game today," she teases him before put a soft kiss on his lips.

Lucas holds Maya from her waist and looks directly into her eyes, "Want to guess what I made fr dinner?" he asks.

"I don't need to, my nose told me," she replies, gently caressing his waist with her fingers, "I love when you talk lasagna to me," she adds.

Lucas smiles at her, "I love you," he says to Maya.

Maya smiles back at him, "I love you too," she replies, "Now, lasagna, please," she adds.

Lucas chuckles, "At your service," he says before moving a few feet from her and walk into the kitchen.

Once they finish dinner, Lucas takes Maya to the couch, "Ok, you stay there, cozy and hot as usual, I'll be back in a minute," he says before running to the kitchen.

"Bring me Cheetos, please," she asks him.

"Check my bag next to the couch," he shouts from the kitchen.

Maya takes his bag, only to find a bag of Cheetos, a few cans of her favorite apple soda, and a DVD, "For real? you got me Cheetos, LaCroix Apple, and a movie? Now I feel bad because I only got you lingerie," she shouts back.

Lucas walks back with two cups of hot cocoa, "You mean lingerie for you to show off on me or lingerie for me?" he asks, hoping for the first option.

"Lingerie for me to show off, but now that you say it, I might get you Lingerie too. I bet you're going to look sexy AF with some," she teases him.

"Please, no," Lucas replies, giving her one of the cups, "You look good on that, not me. I look good on jeans," he adds.

"Also without them," Maya comments.

"Awww, you love me," Lucas says before sitting next to her.

"I do, now, movie," she says, poking his cheek.

Lucas takes the DVD from the case, "I know you think I got myself boyfriend points with the lasagna, but I'm gonna get more for this," he says before putting the DVD on the DVD player. The TV goes black, while Lucas turns off the lights before coming back to Maya.

"Is this 'Don't look behind you'?" Maya asks.

Lucas kisses her forehead, "Yeah, and after this, 'Held for Ranson'," he answers.

"I guess someone is gonna have a busy night tonight," Maya flirts with him.

Saturday, January 25, 2020

Lucas slowly wakes up, and as soon as his eyes open, they land on Maya painting a few feet away from him, making him smile, "You know, a man can get used to waking up to this view," he says, enjoying the lack of clothes his secret girlfriend was wearing.

Maya keeps painting without looking at him, "Yeah? Well, a woman can get used to sleeping next to you, even with your snores," she replies.

"I don't snore," Lucas defends himself getting up from her bed before gently hugging her from behind.

"Yeah, you do," she continues, feeling his warmth.

"You're mean to me," Lucas says, kissing her shoulder, "Should I make breakfast?" he asks.

Maya stays silent for a few seconds, "You know, I was thinking," she starts.

"That's new," Lucas teases her.

Maya hits him with her brush, painting his face, "As I was saying, I was thinking," she resumes, "Maybe we can go out for breakfast," she adds.

"Why? I mean, not against that, but people might see us," he questions her.

Maya smiles, still facing her canvas, "So?" she asks before turning to look at him, "Would that be so bad?" she asks.

"Are you for real?" Lucas asks, half happy, half surprised.

"Yeah, I mean, secret or not, you're still my boyfriend of one year who gives me a nice anniversary dinner," she answers, "You earn that," she adds.

Surprised, Lucas looks at her with a massive smile on his face, "I'm still dreaming?" he asks, making her laugh.

"You want me to take my offer back?" she asks back.

"Ohhh, and offer and a teasing in one morning, girl, you know how to push my buttons," Lucas replies before kissing her lips, "Where you want to have breakfast?" he asks.

"I have a place," she answers before turning to Lucas, kissing his lips, "But first," she says before gently push him into her bed.

"God, I love Saturdays," Lucas says with a smile.

.

Around an hour and a half later, Maya and Lucas walk into the Nighthawk Diner.

"Ok, still feels like home," Maya says.

"You're so cute when you remember things like that," Lucas comments before putting a kiss on her cheek.

"I'm always cute," Maya replies, softly punching his arm, "Let's get a table," she adds, pulling him by his hand.

"Maya!" They both heard as soon as they sit.

"Maddie!" Maya says, hugging the waitress that called her.

"How is my favorite teen doing?" she asks before landing eyes on Lucas, "Oh? And this gentleman is?" she asks.

Lucas looks at her, "Lucas Friar," he introduces himself before looking at Maya, "I'm her friend," he says.

"Friend?" Maddie asks Maya.

"Boyfriend," Maya corrects her, making Lucas smile.

"The Texas boy?" she asks.

"Yeah," Maya answers.

"I'm so happy for you, Maya," Maddie says, caressing Maya's shoulder in approval, "Great to meet you, Lucas. You can't go wrong with her," she adds. 

Lucas looks at Maya, "I know," he replies.

Maddie looks the way Lucas looks at Maya, wishing to have someone that looks at her the way Lucas looks at Maya, "Full breakfast?" she asks Maya.

"You know me so well," Maya replies, watching her Mother's former coworker leave them with a smile.

"I'm gonna put aside the fact that you called me boyfriend to ask, 'the Texas boy?'" Lucas asks, trying to mask his happiness for being called her boyfriend in public.

"Let's say that thanks to my Mother, everyone knows who you are here," Maya replies.

"Have I ever mention how much I like your Mom?" he asks, making Maya chuckle.

"A few times," Maya says.

Lucas chuckles, "You know, I wonder if your Mom was able to tell how I was feeling for you way before me?" he asks.

Maya smiles at him, "Who knows?" she replies, keeping to herself all the nights her Mother warn her that he looks at her in the same way Shawn looked at her when they marry.

A few minutes later, Maddie came back with two sets of eggs, bacon, orange juice, coffee, and pancakes, "Two sets of full breakfast, syrup for the gentleman, and for my favorite teen, whipped cream too," she says, putting everything on the table.

"Can I?" Lucas asks, trying to get some of her whipped cream.

"That depends on how much you value our private time together," Maya answers.

Lucas gives her an offended look, "Are you seriously holding sex for whipped cream?" he asks.

"You would be surprised about how many foods I would hold sex for," she replies.

"I'm dating the sin of gluttony," he teases her.

Maya smiles and puts the whole cream over her pancakes, "You're damn right, Huckleberry," she says before start eating. 

After one good and nutritious breakfast, they keep enjoying each other's company until Lucas was the first to get up, "If you excuse me, this has been way too much coffee," he says before walking to the bathroom.

"You're a pig," Maya comments.

Lucas blows her a kiss, "Your pig," he replies before disappearing into the corridor.

As if it was the most normal thing, Maya takes advantage of Lucas being out to steal his bacon, "You go, you lose," she says.

After five minutes of her stealing Lucas's breakfast, Maya heard a voice that she would recognize anywhere, "Maya?" she listened to her back.

Maya turns over, and there he was, Josh Matthews, "Josh?" she says.

"In the flesh," he replies with a smile before sitting on Lucas's seat, "Having breakfast with my niece?" he asks, taking off his sunglasses.

Maya blurt a chuckle, nervous, "Nope," she replies, "What you're doing here?" she asks.

"Hangover breakfast," he answers, "So, who's breakfast I'm eating?" he asks, taking one of the bacon strips on the plate.

Maya felt her stomach drop when she saw Lucas behind Josh, "That would be mine," he says.

"Howdy?" Josh says, confused.

"Hello," Lucas says.

Josh moves to the side, and Lucas takes his rightful place, "I'm gonna guess you only take one strip of bacon," Lucas says, looking at Maya.

"Guilty," Josh confesses. Maddie walks to them, and as soon as she was close enough, Josh smiles at her, "Hello Mads," he greets her.

"Joshy," Maddie replies, "Hangover breakfast?" she asks.

"Mads, you need to know that I love you to the moon and back," Josh says, thanking her.

"You're lucky my husband likes you," Maddie replies, making him laugh.

"Tell Oliver, I love him too. I don't want him to spit on my milkshake," he jokes.

"Please, we have ethics," Maddie replies walking from the table.

Josh smiles before focusing on Lucas and Maya again, "So, breakfast problem fixed," he states, "Did you went to a party that you're having breakfast together?" he asks.

Lucas looks at Maya and felt his stomach drop, he knew she would make something up, and he knew it wasn't for Josh, but Riley, but he still didn't like it.

Maya felt Lucas eyes on her and smiles at him, "Actually, we're having an anniversary breakfast," she confesses.

Surprised, Lucas looks at her, "Are you sure?" he asks, completely ignoring Josh's expression.

"Wait, so, my niece finally got over Howdy?" Josh asks.

Maya and Lucas look at each other in silence, only to face Josh's surprised expression.

"Wait, she doesn't know?" he asks.

"Yet," Lucas fastly says.

Josh looks at Maya with a disappointed look, "Man, that's fucked up," he says.

"We know," Maya says.

Maddie finally brings Josh's breakfast, "I need something to process that," he says and starts devouring his french fries.

Maya and Lucas let him eat in silence, and once his fries we're done, he looks at his burger, "Please tell me this is new," he says, taking a sip of his milkshake.

Lucas looks at Maya, worried.

"A year," Maya answers.

"What?!" Josh exclaims.

"We've been secretly dating a year," Maya confirms.

Lucas takes her hand and softly caress it, "I know this might be much, but can you please let us handle it?" he asks him.

Josh looks at Lucas and grabs his milkshake, "You, me, outside, now," he says.

Maya grabs Lucas hand, and he gives her a tranquilizing look, "Don't worry, it will be fine,"

Once they were outside, Josh takes Lucas aside where Maya wasn't able to hear them, "Ok, I have a few questions, so if I think you don't answer truthfully, I will tell my niece, do we have a deal?" he asks.

"Not like I have an option, so, deal," Lucas agrees.

"When you discover that you were in love with her?" Josh starts.

"Easy," Lucas says, "It was the day she went with Riley looking for herself and came back showered in purple paint," he answers.

"The day the triangle started?" Josh asks.

"Kinda," Lucas replies, "Trust me, I picked Maya that day, but she turns me down for Riley's well being," he adds.

"Wait, you went on the whole triangle thing because of her?" Josh asks.

"Yeah," Lucas replies, resting his back against the wall.

"Man, that's fucked up," Josh states.

"I know," Lucas comments.

"Let's go back inside," Josh says.

As soon as they come back, they notice how the rest of Lucas's bacon was gone.

"Don't judge me, stress eating," Maya defends herself.

Josh sits in front of his burger and takes a bite, then wash it with a bit of his milkshake, "You need to tell her, soon," he warns Maya, "Also, I'm gonna pretend this breakfast never happened," he adds, before looking at Lucas, "The chat we had outside, didn't happen," he then turns at Maya, "The fact that you are a couple now? I don't know anything about it," he continues, "Do we have a deal?" he asks.

Lucas and Maya look at each other, and Maya finally answers, "We do," she says.

(I don’t like Josh, but this time, i’m not gonna make him the bad guy)

[partyinthemysterymachine]

as a classic cats fan what did you think of the 2019 movie?

FOREWARD: i have full respect to those who enjoyed CATS 2019 and show their support and engage in that part of the fandom. rock on. very truly, honestly, sincerely, i hope you have a blast and create and share and have the best of times. welcome to the fandom, it’s great to have you here; thank you for joining us and i really, really do mean that from the bottom of my heart and soul. it really makes me happy that CATS has become something good for you like it is, and has been, for so many of us. i’m ecstatic to see the fandom expanding and i’m so very serious about that.

unfortunately this is the time to jump ship if you don’t want to hear any more complaints about it. thank you and ilu all and once again, welcome to the fold, i love that you’re joining us and y’all being here honey butters my toast xoxo

there was a 2019 movie?

runs hands down face

from the very first sneeze of an idea of doing a CATS movie went around being speculated in what.. 2012?? i have been against it because i knew it wouldn’t be done right. what i really wanted, really hoped for, what the fandom very honestly deserves and STILL does to this day and beyond is another honest, no dances cut, full on professionally shot video of the stage production again.

i’m still putting my hand to the cold glass and pulling my thin shawl around my shoulders as i gaze past the rain blurring the dreary world outside and sighing a tremendous, weary sigh because Hamilton is getting a full professionally-shot stage movie...... and CATS likely won’t ever.. and how cruel that is.

(not hatin on Hamilton, btw; im just old and bitter LOL i have zero hard feelings towards Hamilton and honestly good for them for getting that done, they deserve it)

so...... listen. i appreciate the thought and commitment to making a CATS movie. i think the biggest thing that busted my balls about it was the use and execution of the CGI cat people. ofc this is a big thing in a lot of opinions. but i’ve always been sitting here like....... 

there are... decades of fanart. decades of productions and photos and costume design. but the fan. art. did anyone go in and look at it? artists have been drawing these characters a wide variety of ways, but when it boils down to the anthropomorphic take on it, i thought it was pretty damn clear how good it could look. i feel like they should have been diggin in the CATS art trenches all this time, all these years, and really taken all these artistic interpretations very seriously to heart. 

it felt like a slap in the face when they overhauled nearly everyone’s design/look to the point where i don’t even know who i’m looking at. and listen, i’m here for redesigns, don’t get me wrong. i dug Jason Derulo’s Tugger design. i dug Idris Elba’s Macavity base idea because he was made a shorthair and clearly all source material says otherwise? and where’s the ginger, mate?? 

(NOTE: in the b’way revival the new Macavity costume is easily 99% black in contrast to the original design in which the costume was 95% red and orange. stark difference. “Macavity’s a ginger cat” contradicts the revival costume a bit since, again, it’s largely black. so in its defense, the costume’s red/orange accents are well placed and the black pays more tribute to the “very tall and thin” aspect he’s supposed to have. (the old costume was wild and hairy, it kinda puffed him out a bit, esp with the much fuller and taller wig.) the revival wig is more on par with main wigs, and it has that coppery color, the makeup is simplistic (as it needs to be added on to Plato) and the color use FOR base Plato brings out the red and etc etc etc. i like the revival costume; it didn’t go overboard on the reds and oranges, it was sleek and powerful, and oh my god you’ve got fingergless gloves with fucking fringe there is a MANE wiht FRINGE who designed that bc i gotta kiss em and offer a piece of my heart and soul)

everything felt muddled, disorganized, foreign, and god why did we do Jennyanydots that why please why are the cockroaches people please are you all ok in production? blink twice if you need help

oh yeah and the fat jokes. i think we were supposed to be getting over that but ok

very interesting thing with Macavity kidnapping the potentials. kinda dug that. fuck it up, Skimbleshanks

and speaking of fuckin Skimbleshanks you have no idea how much of my shit i lost when he started the tap number. i was over the MOON. GOOD shit, FUCK yeah, GO OFF and it was brilliant, absolutely beautiful

ALSO when i heard Judi Dench was gonna be in it i was really hopeful she’d finally play Grizabella. what a fucking treat that would’ve been. she was set to debut the role in the West End, then she tore her Achilles, so Elaine Page replaced her and the rest was history. i’ve really wanted to hear/see her Grizabella. :(

(and briefly on the topic of Grizabella i’m kinda not here for the trend of younger actresses in the role just hhhhhhhh kinda takes away and misplaces her whole vibe and story imo)

i just.. i didn’t understand some of the plot changes like how Macavity was up in everyone’s bs tryna force himself up to the Heavyside Layer, it was silly, and yeah i shouldn’t take CATS so seriously even with the longtime fan background but 

gestures helplessly

y’all fr?? 

there were a lot of super questionable decisions across the board and all that has already been gone over by so many people a dozen billion times. on one hand, i’m glad CATS got some exposure. on the other, :( not like this

however, on a very good note (other than skimbleshanks bless him): let me tell you how EXCITED i was that they used the original Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer arrangement. what a fucking pleasant surprise. HELL yeah. i LOVE that arrangement and i’m tickled to pieces that it was chosen.  good shit. good shit.

tbh as Serious and Bruh Calm Down this might all sound, it’s honestly no skin off my teeth. it’s a frustration, sure. i’m so very tired.  i’m disappointed. i didn’t have any specific expectations about it, just a lot of hopes. maybe too many hopes.

being a longtime CATS fan i know as well or even better than other people what a fucking dumpster fire the show is LMAO it’s wild and it’s ridiculous and god it doesn’t make any sense, it has a plot and it has no plot and everything about it is so horny and it’s the greatest fucking thing to ever happen to me

i obviously have a lot of feelings and history with CATS, and 2019 did not “ruin” anything for me, it didn’t “taint” anything about it, despite everything i’ve complained about i don’t consider myself a purist. (ok. except about the revival choreography. some things are more sacred than the vatican.)

i don’t dig 2019 as a whole. i don’t want to completely disregard it. there are bits and pieces i did like and that i can appreciate. i wish it wasn’t done that way. i just wish we had gotten a true blue professionally shot, no dances cut, honest portrayal of the stage production. 

but hey it is what it is. at the bottom of it all i’m just glad there are new people coming in and taking a look around. it’s nice to see a resurgence of the fandom. it feels really good to see more people here and loving it. i missed CATS and the CATS community. it feels so good to be home.

[liveonmtv]

cash machine || kth

pairing: kim taehyung/f!reader genre: fluff & humor. crack actually. crack cocaine. word count: 11.1k warnings: strong language, drinking, an unwated kiss (not from tae), unsanitary jokes (i’m immature), implied sex, vomiting extra: (fr)enemies to lovers, road trip au, rich kids au but it’s barely there also they’re on summer vacation, also this story takes place in the usa JUST to drag the trip out tbh

summary: Jungkook and Seokjin get a little problematic, you have anger issues and Taehyung is under the impression that he killed a man. Also, did you mention that you’re on your way to your unfunny cousin’s wedding? Go on a road trip from Missouri to Las Vegas and you’ll be in for a hilarious yet scary experience! 

a/n: hi! i’m just starting this account out, so reblogging would mean a lot to me. i’m a novice to writing, so criticism is welcome as long as you’re not rude about it. have fun reading (i hope)! i also have a jungkook fic planned next (:

song

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Jungkook has that look in his face, the one he makes where the person sitting opposite of him is about as depraved as he is. He’s given it to you while you were explaining to him how to scam desperate men under the preface of a faux premium Snapchat and he’s given it to Jimin when they were finishing their high school careers and decided to release grasshoppers in the principal’s office. 

However, if there’s one person that’s about as fucked up in the head as he is, it’s Seokjin. The man also suffers from SMSTS as well (Serious Misconception of Sexual Tension Syndrome, and yes, that’s quite a lot of s’s), which doesn’t hurt given the current affairs. 

While Jungkook is aware that Jimin and Hoseok are always up for a bit of mischief, he has ruled them both out as incompetents and moved on to the real deal. Jimin has these rare moments of sanity and Hoseok, as your most loyal little bitchboy, would probably tattle the situation with made-up details to you before the plan is even set in action. 

So, Seokjin it is. 

The story begins in a faraway land before Jungkook knew about the tragic facets of your family’s relationships. Though his friend group is on good terms with your siblings and your other close relatives are aware of their existence and somehow only have good things to say about them, he never thought they’d be invited to your cousin’s wedding. To be fair, you had to do some serious persuasion for your family to allow you to invite six more people to somebody else’s wedding so there’s that factor contributing, but still, the offer is out of the blue.

Somewhere along the way, you went on a tangent about how much you hate your cousin and how your aunt doesn’t have eyebrows and how bothersome it is to look at her face. Your horror stories were mostly you just being your usual dramatic self, but they also revealed that the [L/n]s aren’t what they appear to be. 

You begged and begged for them to accept the invitations, and though Namjoon and Yoongi, unfortunately, couldn’t make it, the others agreed. 

Then arose the problem of the sixth spot that couldn’t be filled. You would’ve just let it be but your parents insisted that if you’re going to ask for something, you should fulfill it until the end. It was Namjoon you’d asked to come first, but he was busy with visiting family back in Seoul, and Yoongi then declared that he didn’t feel like humoring you this once. And that was the exact moment Jungkook decided to strike.

“You want to play matchmaker?” Jin asks. And though he looks almost skeptical, his tone is definitely an excited one. “With [Y/n] and Tae, of all people?” 

“Well yes, think about it logically,” he explains as he is about to say something completely illogical. “She has that sixth spot to fill, she has no other friends and they’re perfect for each other. All the other shit we’re gonna pull is just for fun, though.”  

Jin laughs an evil laugh, always one to be up for evil schemes. Just another evil day in the evil life of Kim Seokjin. “Well, [Y/n] is Tae’s perfect mean girl. And that girl needs either therapy or to get laid, but like, same.” 

“See? You get me.”

“To be fair, I think that goes for all of us. No offense.” 

“None taken,” Jungkook agrees. “Anyways, I was thinking of a… road trip.” 

“Well you didn’t have to be so dramatic about it, this isn’t The Godfather. Though I do feel like I’ve definitely got a bit of Michael Corleone in me.” 

Jungkook shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly at the other fiend’s remark. “You can pray to god all you want. Here in these streets, the only thing we believe in is El Chapo.” 

“I— Okay…” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

[11:05] LeBruh James: wtf is wrong with u

[11:05] LeBruh James: get help seriously

[11:06] jk the slump god: all i said was that u should invite taehyung as the 6th person to ur cussin’s wedding 

[11:06] jk the slump god: overreacting arent we 

[11:10] LeBruh James: what the hell is a cussin bitch im gonna kill u

[11:13] jk the slump god: not like u have anyone else to invite tho 

[11:13] jk the slump god: hes not that bad ur just being urself

[11:14] LeBruh James: ur literally Not helping ur case rn

[09:45] LeBruh James: none of the girls want to gooooo

[09:45] LeBruh James: fine if it has to be taehyung ig ill live w it

[10:30] jk the slump god: great he already said yes

[10:30] jk the slump god: btw we’re gonna go in las vegas at the end of a road trip u in?

[10:33] LeBruh James: HE SAID YES BEFORE I EVEN INVITED HIM…

[10:33] LeBruh James: EYE. OK.

[10:33] LeBruh James: on one hand i kind of dont want to see any of u but if ur all gone i wont have anything to do b4 the wedding so i guess im in by proxy

[10:34] jk the slump god: lovely doing business with u y/n-chan

[10:36] LeBruh James: call me y/n-chan again and I Will Put ur Dick-Chan in a Freezer-sama and then Cut-san it off

[10:39] jk the slump god: i dont think ur using the honorifics correctly tbh..

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“I don’t see how this is a good idea,” you state with a dramatic pout while looking out of the window. Your expression is solemn. 

Taehyung kind of can’t believe that you’re throwing a tantrum just because you had to sit next to him in the three-row SUV, but on the other hand, he’s kind of into it. You’re more appalled by the fact that he’s not as disgusting up close as you’d imagined him to be. Well granted, you’re being immature, but it’s your shtick so they take it with a grain of salt.

“Why’s that?” Jungkook asks obtusely. He ruined your life the moment he started calling you [Y/n]-chan and he has that bad case of crazy eyes he gets sometimes when you look at his reflection in the mirror going on right now. You’d be more understanding of his condition, hadn’t your trip started barely five minutes ago. 

“What do you mean why is that? We’re all unstable backstabbing lunatics, do you think we can survive together for six whole days?! Stranded or even in a hotel? And then the ride back to Springfield?”

“Hotel? You’re funny. It’s always been my dream to sleep in a motel,” Jin pipes up. 

“Seriously? No limo, now this.”

“Hotel, motel, holiday inn,” Hoseok starts singing. Perhaps if it was queen Britney, it would’ve curbed your temper but fate doesn’t seem to be that kind. 

“Hotel, motel, holiday inn! Hotel, motel, holiday inn! Hotel, motel, holiday inn!” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“So we’re not going to visit the Grand Canyon?” 

“It’s in Nevada,” Jimin explains. “We don’t have any business there except for going to the wedding. I’d be more down to do it if I wasn’t afraid that one of us, meaning [Y/n], would push one of the others, meaning you, in the gutter.” 

“Just a little visit?” Taehyung is talented at only hearing what he wants to hear. However, that doesn’t make the conversation any more productive.

“Well not to be the acrophobic buzzkill, but why are you so adamant about visiting the Grand Canyon?” This is the first time you’ve directly addressed Taehyung since the beginning of these mind-numbing two hours. Jin, hands still on the wheel, dares to take a peek at Jungkook and smile an asshole-type smile before almost accidentally crashing into a pole. 

“Watch the road!” Hoseok cries out. Everyone else either refuses to acknowledge what just occurred or decides to spare themselves from doing so.

“Jin says that he always wanted to sleep in a motel. I have another dream.” 

“To visit the Grand Canyon?”

“Not exactly. I want to take a shit in there and see if I can hear it splatter. Think that’s possible?”

“Maybe if you angle your butthole the right way—” Jimin’s explanation is cut short.

“Oh my god, you are disgusting. Shut up. I don’t want to hear it.”  

“What did I tell you about El Chapo, [N/n]?” 

“What about El Chapo?”

“Holy shit, I think I’m confusing conversations,” Jungkook admits. Jin offers no more than an eye-roll.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Tulsa is a dump, really. Unfortunate that you had to make a stop here but also you’re satisfied because your right asscheek feels numb right now. Might have to take Kelly for a walk, though.  

Taehyung stumbles out of the vehicle after you and all six of you seize each other fleetingly before making your way towards the gas station, a tense sort of silence following. You’re first to speak up. “Y’know, I’ve been listening to your voices for so long now that I don’t wanna look at your faces.” 

“This tbh,” Hoseok agrees with your most profound sentiments as per the usual. He’s quick to match your pace, trailing after you like a lost puppy, successfully getting Taehyung out of his way. He puts his arm around your shoulders casually and you give him that sardonic smile that’s only really reserved for him.

“Don’t say tee-bee-aytch out loud. I get humiliation by proxy.” 

Jungkook makes an exaggerated gagging sound before nudging Taehyung subtly enough that Jin is the only one who sees the interaction. Though the eldest had agreed with his deranged idea, there’s one thing that Kook knows that Jin hasn’t come to find out. 

Taehyung has an ongoing problem or maybe he’s a masochist. He’s always been one to internally get attached to these girls who’d never give him the time of day, who can’t stand him at all. The tragedy-comedy that is his best friend’s love life started on a rainy day in second grade when a girl by the name of Seulbi punched him in the face and he was hooked on her for three years after. 

After the infamous Seulbi, came Yeonji from the cheerleading club who blew off his invite to his first-ever party when they were fifteen. She’d called him a loser to his face and he was smitten with her for a while, too. 

And then, you appeared in his life seemingly out of nowhere. Hoseok’s catty best friend with a tongue sharper than her stilettos and lipstick that goes perfectly with her skin tone. 

Of course, he was aware of your existence prior to that accident he calls his first conversation with you—be it from the exciting yet flat-out brain dead antics Hoseok would describe you’d gotten caught up in at the time or from the sound of your heels sinking into the floor promptly before you entered math class.  You were always late but claimed that the teacher should be grateful because you cut in line to arrive at school earlier. You always had one of those shitty overrated pumpkin spice lattes in your manicured hands. 

Simply put, Taehyung likes you. Though after your disastrous first meeting during which, blunt-natured and seemingly lacking a sense of self-preservation, he called you a stuck up moron and you threatened to make an attempt at his life. With your bullheaded nature, things never did solve themselves after that one instance.

It’s not something that he’s expressed outwardly, but Jungkook knows him better than he knows the back of his hand. Unfortunately, he knows you too, even if not as well and he knows how you can’t get a boyfriend because you either scare them away or you find out they’re only after a quick fuck and some money. 

Regardless, Jungkook writes off his inner ramblings as irrelevant before turning to Jin in what could be described as a conspirative manner. While clumsily handing the cashier gas money, he whispers something in the other man’s ear and Jin’s eyes literally twinkle like he’s in a low-budget porno. 

He nods, furiously so, and the cashier simply stares at them like they’re two idiots that somehow merged into one. It’s not a pretty sight. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“What? We’re sleeping out here?” Your whining is to be expected by now. Had any of your friends written an actual, physical, list of all the things you’ve complained about so far, it’d probably fill a notebook. Thankfully enough, said list remained as a mental compilation of your not-so-epic moments. “What about the motel?” 

“Oh, so now you want a motel?” Jin quips back with a smirk. “They always come ‘round.” 

Despite his boasting and apparent eagerness to go to a motel, that doesn’t change the fact that you all find yourselves in a campsite. You’re not an outdoor person save for going to parties or on a shopping spree with Hoseok. And well, your surroundings are a bit too green right now.

Taehyung is the next person to speak up, with a tense posture and his arms crossed over his chest, almost defiantly so. “Honestly, if you don’t want to be here, I don’t understand why you keep coming to these things.”

“Well, I don’t understand why I had to invite your dumb ass here either. I guess the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.” 

“Yeah, I thought Namjoon or Yoongi would be more fitting for your taste of guest,” he says, outright taunting you now, as if to remind you of your failed love rendezvous with your now close friends. 

“Well yeah, but they both denied, so I had to invite you.” 

“Ah,” he gives a slight sigh and you dismiss the sadness you register in his voice as something deserved for annoying you, “that does make more sense. Lucky me, I guess.”

“Awkies,” Jungkook announces as if it’s something that needs to be announced. Hoseok simply shrugs, and though you’re definitely not looking forward to sleeping out in the woods, he seems excited to try something new. 

There’s something hilarious about seeing a bunch of upper-class kids trying to set up tents and start a fire. You’ve converted to the cavemen with Hoseok, seemingly unaware that engaging in a one-sided debate with a bundle of sticks won’t make them randomly engulf in flames while Hoseok is trying out a trick he saw in the movies.

Honestly, it’s enough of a miracle that you actually went out in the woods and helped without tripping your silly ass and getting lost among the catacombs. Granted, Hoseok would’ve been compassionate enough to look for you had you gotten lost, but you probably wouldn’t get over the trauma of being covered in mud. 

Taehyung notices you both struggling. Part of him wants to make amends with you and a bigger part of him wants to leave Jimin to scramble on his own. Not that he’s sadistic or anything, he just likes seeing others suffer sometimes for entertainment purposes. 

Anyways. 

He approaches casually, like the kind of casual where you can tell that the person has an ulterior motive that they don’t want to reveal. Hoseok appears happy to see him, like he’s a savior on a white horse, while you don’t acknowledge him that much except for a sharp question regarding what he wants. 

He greets the older boy with one of these grins you won’t admit you enjoy looking at before roaming through the pockets of his jacket. Now that you’ve noticed him wearing one, you come to the sudden realization that it is getting quite breezy. 

Taehyung has the habit of scrunching his nose when he’s looking for something and then unconsciously smile broadly after succeeding in finding it. You don’t like that you’re aware of that and you especially don’t like that you can pinpoint the repetitive action.

It appears that Taehyung was looking for a lighter, of all things. 

“I thought you quit smoking?” You simply give him an incredulous look. 

He doesn’t grace you with an answer. Though he doesn’t reek of the putrid smell, you’re still hoping that the answer to that question is yes. Instead of soothing your curiosity, however, he uses the lighter to ignite a spark in the firewood and you guess that it’ll have to do.

“Well, that was quite pathetic,” you comment unhelpfully. 

“Better than Hobi’s attempts and uh, whatever the fuck you were doing.” 

Hoseok is enthusiastic to announce that the bonfire’s ready. You watch the clumsily prepped three tents in disinterest, not bothering to defend your attempt at enchantment to him. “Hoseokie, you’re gonna share a tent with me right?” 

“Hoseokie,” Jin repeats, but in good fun, “I thought you were gonna crash with me tonight?”

You roll your eyes before redirecting your gaze towards Jimin and Jungkook. By the guilty smile Jungkook gives you, you can tell he doesn’t plan on letting Jimin out of his clown clutches. You narrow your expression and jut your lip out disapprovingly. 

“Well, Mr. Handsome,” Jin interrupts whatever you have to say with a thank you, “since you and Kook have been jointed by the assholes since we got here, I don’t see what the problem is.” 

“I think you’re just saying that because you don’t wanna sleep with Tae,” Hoseok comments obliviously. 

“What he said. Also, these crackwhores are planning something, and I’m going to find out what.”

“Well, you’re in tough luck because Hoseok promised,” Jin argues, emphasizing the word promise. He has a shit-eating grin on his face and he’s not even denying your accusation. 

Taehyung coughs once. The second time is overkill and sounds even faker than the first one. “Sorry, but if [Y/n] isn’t comfortable sharing the tent with me, it doesn’t really matter what Hoseok promised.” 

You gape at him. This is probably the first intelligent thing that you’ve heard come out of his mouth. You almost reconsider your treatment of him after that, but then you remember that a guy being half-decent isn’t something you’re supposed to celebrate. You suppose that even he looks like a saint compared to some of your exes.

Everyone notices the conflict on your face but doesn’t say anything about it. Jin admits that Taehyung’s right with a wail yet the tension doesn’t dissolve, somehow. You excuse yourself by declaring that you’re going to get the blankets out of the SUV. 

“Damn, that bad huh?” Jungkook laughs. It’s the hyena laugh that kind of doesn’t suit his face but also the one he does when he’s having fun for no good reason. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“I heard in the girls’ bathroom once that this girl went on a diet where she only eats bananas for three months. Like, five a day,” you explain while you munch on your banana in front of the bonfire. Needless to say, you’ve come out to be severely underprepared in terms of food on your first day. 

“That sounds like a strategy to make yourself unhinged,” Hoseok retorts. He believes your story but he’s skeptical about that banana business. “I’d never do that.” 

“Me neither. Diets are stupid, anyway, can’t a bitch eat?” 

Jungkook reaches over and high-fives you, looking at you like you’ve just invented air or some shit. “Amen to that sister.” 

“By the way, what’s the plan for tomorrow?” Jimin is the one to speak up this time. 

“I have quite the plan for you, alright,” Jin laughs. His next statement, however, is the embodiment of his immature nature. “But that banana talk had me all distracted.”

Everyone collectively groans. You’re not really sure if what he said would classify as a dad joke at this point; you’re now entering single-and-desperate-dad joke territory. Can’t say that you’d enjoy it coming from someone else, but Jin is Jin.

“Anyways,” he dismisses his previous remark with an easy-going smile and a wave of his hand in thin air, “we’re going to a breakfast place first thing in the morning. By foot.” 

His grin is mischievous. You think this is the worst idea he’s had yet and no one else present seems attracted by the prospect of it either, so you vocally oppose him with a raised brow. “Don’t you realize how likely it is we’ll get lost?” 

“Yeah, I also don’t wanna walk too much.” Hoseok’s always one to back you up.

“Technology doesn’t lie, [Y/n].”

“If technology doesn’t lie how come I had a D on my maths test in junior year when I used Photomath?” 

Hoseok agrees, remembering the incident. That day was truly one of sorrow. 

“Technology only lies if you’re gullible enough,” Jin now changes the narrative. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You sneak out of your and Hoseok’s tent with a brief explanation thrown over your shoulder. Something about getting your make-up wipes from the trunk. Hoseok mutters inspiring words of advice—be careful, it’s dark and who knows what animal puke is on the ground—and you stumble your way to the SUV. 

Shoving the keys in the hole proves to be a difficult task, however. You aimlessly jut it in, hoping to hit the correct place by some sort of miracle. This is the moment that you realize that your eyes aren’t so good at adapting to the darkness. 

“Hey, what’re you doing?”

You jump up out of pure reflex. Startled, you whip around with a bemused look on your face. You’re gonna get wrinkles, damn it. 

“Woah, girl jumps in heels,” Taehyung comments dryly. 

“Don’t sneak up on me, you idiot cokehead,” you retort. You’re not sure why you said that. He’s not a cokehead. 

“No, but seriously, what’re you doing?” 

“I’m trying to look for my make-up wipes.” 

Taehyung takes the keys from you. Without half as much fumbling as you’d done previously, he opens the trunk and you proceed with looking through your purse, only to come to the conclusion that you’ve forgotten your make-up lines somewhere. There’s now a new resolve, clear as day in your twisted mind—you have to find the supermarket you passed by on your way here and buy new ones.

“Did you find them?”

“No.” You scoff. An angry thaw and the trunk is now closed. “I’m going to buy some.” 

“Woah, calm down tiger. Can’t you just sleep with it?” 

“No! Do you know how bad that is for your skin?” 

“Well, we could find a river and you could wipe your face with the dirty water.” 

You give him a blank stare, barely suppressing a small giggle. “Do you understand how ridiculous you’re being?” 

“I’m being ridiculous?”

Silence.

“...You’re not planning to go off in the woods during the dawn of asscrack, right?” 

“The what? Yeah.”

Taehyung looks towards your tent only to see that the light is completely shut down. Hoseok must be asleep already. “I’ll go with you.” 

You roll your eyes. “Do whatever you want.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“So, why do you hate your cousin so much?” Taehyung asks abruptly from behind you. 

Most of your walk has been a silent one, so far, except for an occasional grumble from you and an absentminded one-liner from him. There’s also the sound of sticks crumbling under your high-heels that’s slightly irritating. 

“Because she’s unfunny,” you reply seriously.

“You have issues.” This is probably the least significant reason someone has ever hated somebody else for, in the entire history of hatred. Strangely enough, however, Taehyung can’t help finding it endearing how outlandish you can be.

“I’m sorry, I must have Alzheimer’s because I don’t remember asking,” you snap with a roll of your eyes. 

“You know, I have a dog,” he begins dramatically. “And sometimes he shits on the carpet and one time he puked on me, but I still love him very much. He’s gang, you feel?” 

“I don’t see how that helps with my family situation.”

“I never said it’s supposed to help, I just wanted to talk about myself.” He snickers. You’re getting the most violent of urges. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Leering over the thin metal fence that looms over an otherwise mundane hill gives you an idea. Down the admittedly high hill, the supermarket is obnoxiously lit up. However, the hideous sight doesn’t deter you—this is what your nirvana looks like in the given moment.

With one bold move, you lift your leg up the fence and Taehyung considers you, your motives and perhaps even your life until now. “What are you doing?” 

“It’ll be faster if I go down the hill.” 

“You’re gonna break your ankles in these shoes,” he rebuts, his voice a tilted monotone. “Also, I can see your underwear like this.” 

“Perveeeeert.” This is your final taunt before you do make it over the short fence and onto the other side. Examining the hill from up close—but not before you roll your miniskirt down—you come to two conclusions. The first one is that it’s quite steep and the second one comes when you’re one step down, that maybe, just maybe, you’re a bit deranged.

With your back turned to him, you don’t get to see Taehyung experiencing the five stages of grief. There’s obvious conflict on his face and to be precise, his current dilemma is between worry for you and a lack of power to stop you. Perhaps had you turned around, you’d find the sight entertaining.

His movements are leisurely once he does get in motion. Taehyung’s plan is to simply help you up now that he noticed that you’re hesitating to go further than you’ve already gone. 

His voice cutting through the night’s silence startles you. “Hey, you really shouldn’t do this.” 

You stumble. 

As tragic as that is, there’s something else to placate you; you’ve never seen Taehyung move so fast. Not even during the blip test in high school. The rest of his actions are less endearing—he throws you over his shoulder carelessly, stumbles onto the sidewalk and drops you like it’s hot. And then your legs are a bit wobbly, but you pretend they aren’t. 

The unnerving silence remains all the way to the supermarket, then back to the campsite and even when Taehyung’s awkwardly using his phone as a flashlight in your face while you remove your make-up. There’s nothing to say, except maybe if he were to ask you a question that’s not to your liking.

(He’s not that bad.)

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Jin is in a hurry, but you’re not sure what for. It’s been practically less than a day since you started this road trip, but it feels longer. You’re conflicted about how to feel regarding that, but even so, Jimin and Hoseok’s enthusiasm is hard to ignore. 

The feline smile on your face drops the moment Jungkook basically drags you out of your tent, bare-faced and severely underdressed. Well, to be honest, you blend in with them just fine, but in your head, you’re severely underdressed. Something more boujee is usually your style, but you realize your predicament won’t magically change the longer you’re walking in what feels like the middle of nowhere. 

Tusla is gross, yes, but maybe Oklahoma is just gross in general. 

When you’re unhappy, you don’t get shy about it—honesty is the best policy, after all. So you’re going on one of those annoying tangents you like to go on like it’s second nature to you. Maybe it is. 

Taehyung drones out whatever it is you’re saying the moment you start talking about a pimple in your nostril that has hair growing out of it. He’s not particularly grossed out by this revelation, rather, he doesn’t like listening to you go on and on about everything you don’t like about yourself. 

“And I couldn’t put on that necklace you got me for my birthday,” you complain before linking your arms with Hoseok’s and feigning a sniff.

“That is pretty horrible,” he hums in agreement. “I think I have a rash on my thigh.” 

“See, if Jungkook wasn’t being horrible I could probably get some kinda product to smear on it.”

Taehyung feigns a loud yawn. Tagging along with you and Hoseok isn’t as tiring as he’d like to make it out to be. 

“What’re you yawning so blatantly for? I hate being interrupted.” You roll your eyes cockily. 

“Sorry, I almost fell asleep during this uninteresting speech of yours.”

You fume again and Hoseok reassures you with something along the lines of don’t worry, [Y/n], it’s very interesting. Then, silence follows. It always seems to end up like this between the two of you. 

“Well, if it helps,” Taehyung starts, tone breezy, “you’re still beautiful.” 

You feel your face heat up. Sure, boys have given you plenty of compliments before—you’re no stranger to it—hot, sexy and maybe pretty on a good day. But beautiful? Especially without any make-up on? This is definitely something new. 

Hoseok smiles. “Yeah, he’s right.” 

You don’t want to admit just how flattered you really are. “Of course I am.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You take the first thing you find to your liking once you reach the breakfast place. Actually, it’s more brunch than it is breakfast, but all that walking is making you starve so you don’t feel particularly inclined to be hung up on semantics. 

“It’s on me.” Jungkook sweeps in smoothly, giving you a flashy smile. 

“Fuck off. I’m still mad at you.”

“You might be, but not for long,” he argues with an obnoxious grin on his face. “They call it… The Kook Effect.” 

You shake your head. “I’m pretty sure you just made that up.”

“Yeah? Remember when you won a bet against Jimin and he had to call you Supreme Majesty in freshman year? And then you pretended that he did it out of his own volition.” 

“Oh, I’m not taking this from you and your dead trim.”

“My trim is fine, thanks.”

“Dead trim!” you repeat, almost frantic. You’re so caught up with Jungkook’s dead trim that you don’t notice that Taehyung is giving you a cheesy smile as he buys you your food. He looks like the greasiest gentleman alive when he hands it to you. 

“And what’s that about?”

“In junior year, at summer camp, they took away our phones because someone recorded the instructor jerking off. And then like, blackmailed him.” 

You quirk an eyebrow up at this, unsure what he’s hinting at. “Right.”

“Right. And then they took all of our phones for a month and you started crying about how your life is a living nightmare.” 

“Right…” you trail off, suddenly embarrassed as if that hadn’t happened a whole two years ago. But like, it totally was a big deal! “The no phone rule was the worst. Even worse than the public bathroom rule.”

“I did it. I’m making it up to you,” he explains. 

You feel your mouth twitch into a small smile, one that he hasn’t quite seen on you before. “I forgive you this once, then.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“We’re going to a hotel after sightseeing,” Jin explains. It’s like he’s got everything figured out all by himself and perhaps with the help of Jungkook’s annoying personality. “I arranged the rooms and everything while you were eating.” 

“Quite epic,” Jimin comments absentmindedly. “Wait, rooms? Like, you mean who’s rooming with who?” 

“Yeah, I finished the registration.” He stares directly at you and then Taehyung. “You could switch if you wanted to, it doesn’t really matter.”

You give him a light glare, already having a brief idea of what he’s done, but don’t comment any further. With a sense of deja vu, you speak up again. “What about the motel?” 

“I wasn’t sure if we’re going to be passing by one today, so I thought hey! Better safe than sorry.” 

Everyone nods in half-agreement until Jin speaks up again. “Plus, you guys reek. You should shower. Couldn’t be me.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Predictably, Jin did set you and Taehyung up. You can’t tell what kind of game he and Jungkook are playing, however, the poor boy isn’t half as insufferable in your eyes ever since this road trip began, so maybe you should thank them. Still, you don’t trust them—their minds are as twisted as yours.

As the two of you are dragging your luggage towards your shared room, Taehyung reminds you that you’re free to tell him if you don’t want to sleep with him. “I could go to Jungkook’s room or something.”

You find the idea of being alone more unfavorable than you thought you would. Perhaps your high-school, drastically more histrionic, self would’ve found anything more pleasant than sharing a room with Taehyung. You’re a (slightly) changed person now, though. Or at least you’d like to believe you are.

“Let’s put it like this. I hate a lot of things.”

“You don’t need to tell me that, I already know,” he interrupts with a crude giggle. 

“But you’re not one of them,” you admit. 

There’s also the fact that the two of you are blatantly ignoring that you could switch with Jin and sleep with Hoseok instead.

No more words are spoken between the two of you that day. New Mexico isn’t half as bad as Oklahoma was. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You wake up before Taehyung does, punctually so. Rolling out of bed, you partly don’t care whether you wake him but at the same time, you try to avoid making too much noise before slipping into the bathroom. Though you’re definitely one to value your beauty sleep, yesterday’s incident left you paranoid over whether Jungkook or Jin would catch you unprepared. 

You go through your routine calmly and by the time Taehyung goes in the bathroom to take a piss, you’re ready to start doing your make-up. You stare at the foundation in your hand but before you can apply it, you hesitate. 

Do I need make-up to be desirable?

Of course, you’re aware that not all women who use make-up are insecure, or that it’s always necessarily toxic for your self-esteem. And you thought that was the case with you as well, but your doubts suggest otherwise. Swiftly, you put all of your stuff away, stick with your trusty lipstick and nothing else. 

“Morning,” he says, groggy still. 

“Morning.” You look over to him from the corner of your eye and he looks kind of dazed. “Jin says we’re staying here until tomorrow morning.” 

“Cool. Hotel’s nice. The scenery too.” 

“I guess.” 

There’s something cripplingly awkward when the two of you aren’t hurling insults at each other, you realize. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You’re off somewhere with Hoseok and Jin when Taehyung is hanging out with Jimin and Jungkook. Turns out their room has a nice balcony, and with the others out of the picture, there’s some kind of buzzed chatter about incoherent topics swirling around. 

Jungkook suddenly decides that it’s a good idea to start talking about his sexcapades. Maybe it’s the alcohol or maybe his mind’s slipping. Jimin kind of wants to admit how much he doesn’t care what his friend does outside of watching anime and playing video games, but there’s also a part of him that’s morbidly intrigued by Jungkook’s words. Like a dark spell or something. 

“I wanted to hit it off with [Y/n] in high school,” he admits bluntly.

The other two stare at him.

“Oh really? What made you change your mind?” Jimin asks, now more awake than ever. 

“Dunno. Like, she’s more like, the bitchy rival in rom-coms, not the protagonist. I liked her, but I didn’t think I could handle her,” he admits.

“Once we were clubbing and this guy was messing with me and I complained to her about it,” Jimin begins, leaning into his chair with a fond smile on his face, “and she was all like, I’ll show him. And I was like, what? And she was like, I’ll show him who he’s dealing with. And then I was like, okay, maybe don’t show him that much.” 

The three of them chuckle. Taehyung talks for the first time in a while. “Nah, I agree.”

“You dig it though, right?” 

Jimin gives him a knowing look right after Jungkook shoots his question with a drunken smile. He guesses that since Hoseok isn’t here, he can finally admit it. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I do. But I can’t get things right with her.” 

“What do you mean?”

“It’s like, we’re either fighting or it’s really awkward.” 

“You’re on your own.” Jimin dismisses him with a wave of his hand. “I don’t think she hates you that much. It’s always Taehyung this, Taehyung that.” 

“True,” Jungkook agrees. “Like yes, maybe she’s complaining about you half the time and I know she loves gossiping but I’ve never heard her talk about someone else that much. Except maybe Yoongi. What I’m sayin’ is, you should give it a shot.”

“Why do you guys even fight so much?” Jimin laughs. “Whenever it happens, I like, forget what even happened to lead up to that.” 

“Well, you know me. I’m always too honest for my own good and when I hit her with some snark she starts getting all defensive. I just...” He sounds defeated by the time he’s finished with his explanation. Taehyung’s shoulders visibly slump and his frame slides down the uncomfortable chair. “I just want to get along with her.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

The fourth day is the first time you actually aren’t sure where you are. Save for supposedly being close to Nevada by now, you tuned out the rest of Jin’s explanation despite your previous attempts at keeping up with your location. 

Regardless, what’s important is living in the present. And the present for you right now is walking down a nameless street, in a mess of other tourists, with your pants uncomfortably sticking to your ass with sweat. In short, you feel gross. 

Taehyung doesn’t seem to be having the same problem, while you can’t even fake being unfazed. You envy him just the tiniest bit. 

A trashy souvenir shop seems to catch Taehyung’s attention. In the scorching heat and sand-yellow scenery of this town, however, even that seems more appealing. So when he urges you to go with him, you find yourself reluctantly agreeing. 

When you step in, the air conditioning of the otherwise homey shop welcomes you like taking a breather during an overcrowded party. You let an unconscious smile take over your face when you greet the cashier. She’s cute and her adorableness factor only spikes up when she practically beams at the sight of customers. 

“Hi! Please, feel free to look around.” 

“We will,” Taehyung answers offhandedly. Her gaze lingers on him. 

Most of the things don’t interest you. Actually, they’re hideous if you had to be completely honest. He doesn’t seem that enamored by them either, but you can tell he finds more redeeming qualities about them than you do. 

Your eyes almost bulge out of your face when you see the most live-laugh-love-esque decoration to exist. Like something your mom would laugh-react to on Facebook. 

The offender is no more than three inches tall and wide, a ceramic plate with a cartoony burger portrayed on it. It’s holding a flag that says two simple words: “Nice Buns!” 

You can’t tell if it’s the radioactivity of Jungkook’s cooking from earlier or if this thing is what’s making you nauseous. However, food-poisoning or not, you’re quite disgusted by what you’ve just seen. “Oh my god, the caucasity.” 

“Aw, you don’t like it?” Taehyung says with a mocking pout. “I think it’s cute.” 

“What’s wrong with you? It’s corny.”

“No, it isn’t. It might’ve been if it was a corn-dog, though.” 

You heaved an over-dramatic sigh. “You’re saying words that have no positive impact on my life.”

“I think I’ll buy it,” he declares, before checking the price and realizing he hasn’t brought enough money with himself. 

You shake your head. “I’m not gonna be an accomplice to… that.” 

“Well, of course not. This is your Valentine’s present.”

“Go to hell. As if I’d be your Valentine in the first place,” you reply sardonically before pushing him out of the way.  

Taehyung realizes something at that moment. Even outside your evident disinterest in him and his affairs, the two of you are completely incompatible. You, too quick to judge and be offended and him, too quickly to say the first thing on his mind, obviously don’t mesh smoothly. 

Neither of the boyfriends you’ve had that he’s spoken to is anything like him, either. If Namjoon and Yoongi have one thing in common, it’s that they’re both calm, collected and have a good head screwed securely on top of their shoulders. He’s not like that.

Even so, that revelation only makes the concept of being with you more alluring. 

Kim Taehyung is an idiot. But more importantly, with one glance towards the admittedly good-looking cashier making googly eyes at him, Kim Taehyung makes a decision.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

While you’re taking a shit in a nearby cafeteria, you receive a text from Taehyung. This is shocking by itself since despite the two of you having each others’ numbers, you never really text. 

[15:30] pain in the neck: im going on a date w/ the cashier

[15:30] pain in the neck: feel free to leave

[15:45] Princess Complex: i’m just gonna hang with jungkook thank god

Why is your stomach sinking?

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Once you meet up with Jungkook, you explain the situation briefly. He quickly looks you over, confusion evident on his face. “What? On a date?”

“Yeah, he just kinda left me in the toilet,” you confirm with a shrug. “Anyways, where do you wanna go?” 

It’s not like Jungkook is an oblivious idiot with the emotional capacity of your aunt’s mutated sixth toe, even if he may appear to be. But you never thought he’d call you out the moment your overly confident facade starts slipping. His gaze softens. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?” 

He isn’t examining you when he asks. No, he appears to be looking off, somewhere behind you. However, you remain ignorant to that fact. 

“Yes! Why would I care? I’d rather drink toilet water for ten years straight than spend any more time with that moron,” you snap, too worked up for someone who supposedly doesn’t care. 

“Is that how you really feel about Taehyung?”

“Yes! Yes, oh my god, let it go.”

Jungkook makes one more helpless expression, shrugs lightly, and you fail to realize that neither of those gestures is directed at you. “Let’s go to the arcade.”

“I’m not really into video games,” you lie as you run your hand through your hair, “but fine.”

“Hell yeah.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

When Taehyung goes back to your room in the trashy motel, notably late during the night for a mere first date, the atmosphere is tense. There’s a crease in your brows when you unlock the door and obvious bite marks over your bare lips. He stumbles ahead to enter, but you continue blocking his path with your arms frigidly crossed over your chest.

“You’re late.” 

“And what’s it to you?” He’s never spoken to you so harshly. There are moments where his words bite, but never does he say them with an expression and tone that are so frosty.

“Nothing in particular.” You move out of his way, finally, and he enters. You briefly wonder if he’s had alcohol before you start talking again. “I’ve been stuck in this room for like, an hour because the keys are in me. Waiting for you...”

“Poor you.”

“Excuse me?”

“I heard what you said about me to Jungkook. You know, I’m starting to understand why you scared away all your exes.”

Warth washes over you in waves for a millisecond before it disperses into nothingness, a cold numbness that makes your back shiver. Your gaze on him is empty yet livid at the same time and he cowers under it. You’re not sure if the guilt on his face is a flicker of your imagination or if it’s genuine, but you hope it’s the latter. 

It’s never his words that are a big deal to you. It’s the way he speaks every syllable, so earnestly with truth laced in every letter, that makes you go off the hook. Because deep down, you’re aware that he doesn’t mean to be malicious or to offend, it’s merely him telling his truth.

You grab a few things impulsively with a mundane declaration, before storming off god knows where. “I’m not sleeping here tonight.”

When the door clicks behind your frame, Taehyung backs down and sprawls out across the bed. Truthfully, he regretted his words before he even opened his mouth. But he was so angry, be it with you or with himself.

It just seemed so unfair that you could blow him away time after time and yet, on his date the only thing on his mind was you. The mediocre make-out session and him awkwardly leaving out of nowhere didn’t help, either. And then you had to be so perfect, waiting for him instead of locking his ass out like he thought you would.

It isn’t the girl’s fault she’s raised to be as sweet as sugar while you’re more like citrus. He’s always had a knack for lemons, anyway.

The fact that you spent the rest of the day with Jungkook only aggravates him further, the younger’s words repeating in his head. I tried to hit it off with [Y/n] in high school, or whatever it was that he said exactly. All of this is his own fault, anyway—if he hadn’t been so temperamental, you would’ve stayed with him for the rest of the day.

Taehyung stares at the cheap lights hanging on the ceiling until his eyes hurt that night.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Half-way through your trek to Hoseok’s room, you crumble. A sob escapes your throat and then another one. After these two instances, your tears don’t cease. 

At first, Jimin is excited to see you at their door but his smile slips the moment he realizes what a bad state you’re in. You’re practically making whale noises while desperately searching for Hoseok. 

“I’ll give you two a moment.” He gives you one final look-over and leaves with a not-so-threatening threat. “Or maybe thirty. You better be smiling and singing Toxic by the time I’m back, [Y/n].”

Hoseok rushes to hug you. “God, girl, what’s wrong?”

“I like Taehyung.” 

“Is that it? You’re a strong girl, y’know, I never pictured you crying over some pretty boy.” 

“No. I’m crying because I’ve liked him all this fucking time and I tried to run away from him because I’m scared. And he said the most horrible thing to me,” you explain as you bury yourself deeper into his embrace. “That’s why I’m crying.”

“I hope he isn’t allergic to hands, because he’s about to catch them. Actually, I hope he is allergic.” Hoseok isn’t one to ask about details. He lets you get it out of your system, makes a few promises (most often of violence) and then allows you to elaborate if you wish to do so.

You laugh, but it turns into choking considering how much snot you have running down your face by now. “He said that he understands why my exes run away from me. I mean, I— I said something rude about him first, but Jungkook was backing me into a corner and I didn’t know he would even find out about it, I just—”

“Forget about him, forget about Jungkook, everyone. Tonight is for Britney,” Hoseok commands more than he asks you.

You smile sadly at him before uselessly wiping your tears away and giggling like you’re on the brink of losing your mind. Perhaps you are.

“My 45-carat booger. Hey, let’s make Jimin do the chicken dance,” Hoseok starts off like he’s coddling you in his strange way of doing so, but then quickly turns diabolical. He throws some tissues at you and you accept them. If there’s one thing you’re truly grateful for, it’d be your best friend.

You nod, suddenly more excited than you should be. Hoseok’s right—you don’t need some pretty boy when queen Britney is watching over you.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

The next day, you’re wearing a full-face of make-up, and Taehyung notices it. Hoseok’s driving and you’re in the passenger seat, talking about some nonsense as usually do. The atmosphere is light, with Jimin and Jungkook occasionally joining in your conversation and Jin sleeping with his forehead pressed against the window.

Truth to be told, Taehyung feels like a zombie right now. Pretending that your scuffle with him meant nothing to you only convinces him further how little you care about anything that has to do with him.

“I think we’ll be in Las Vegas soon,” Hoseok announces cheerily.

On one hand, you’re happy to finally be seeing the end of this road trip. Though you’ve technically just been relaxing, you wanted to be done with your cousin’s dumb wedding and go back to spending an average amount of time with your friends. You want to forget how flippant things are between you and Taehyung, your quote-unquote friendship dictated by mood swings rather than actual feelings.

“Fuck yeah! I wanna get drunk in Vegas,” you say with a smirk. “It’s on my bucket list.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah.”

“You want to get drunk everywhere,” Jungkook corrects with a laugh. You can’t help agreeing with him. “And Jin will probably stay in the hotel and play Candy Crush or something.”

“Ew, ew, ew, a fucking millenial,” you exclaim in mock disgust.

“Jin can be a beast if he wants to. Remember when he twerked in front of the whole school on Taehyung’s birthday party?”

“Shit was wild, man.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

No one except you, Hoseok and Taehyung himself is aware of what transpired yesterday. So Jungkook and Jin are still stubbornly placing the two of you together, yet you’re too powerless to fight it.

The hotel is a fancy one, courtesy of your annoying cousin. She’s been texting you and you sent a short message back to inform her you’ve arrived, but you haven't bothered to deal with her provocations any further. 

After dumping his luggage near his bed, Taehyung was straight out of the room and you started getting ready. And that was that. 

You feel more like yourself when you find the wine hidden in the fridge, a free present from the hotel. Or maybe your cousin’s way of making peace. Ha, as if that’d happen. 

When Taehyung comes back to get dressed, you’re already tipsy and acting like a fool.

“Drinking already?” There are many things that Taehyung wants to say to you. An apology he’s too sober to say and a confession you’re too drunk to hear, to begin with. 

“It’s pre-game,” you explain dizzily. “You know. I never told you why I hate my cousin so much. She used to bully me and she stole my first boyfriend from me. And we never got past it.”

With your trademark look, high-heels, acrylics, a fancy yet revealing dress along with whatever else you consider fashionable at the moment, Taehyung feels familiarity staring at your lopsided smirk. Though he’s gotten glimpses of other sides of you during these past few days, like how you like cuddling during the night, this is the epitome of who you are.

“Yeah,” he replies agreeably, though you’re not sure what for.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but Hoseok is waiting for me. So, this is bye-bye.” 

“See you there.”

“Probably not.” You snicker. Taehyung can tell that you’re still upset with him.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You’re so wasted that the things happening around you aren’t really making sense anymore. While you and Hoseok were drinking together for a while, at one point Jungkook whisked him away, then there’s a blank in your memory and now you’re here. Alone. And you’ve lost count of how many drinks you’ve had. 

A man, that’s definitely a few years older than you, finally approaches you after observing you from afar. He says some sort of sleazy line—you’re not sure what it is, you’re not really listening—and offers you a drink. 

You consider him. He’s not your type at all and that pornstache isn’t helping his case but, when you look at Taehyung and see him talking and having fun while you’re being an alcoholic by your lonesome and moping about him, you quickly accept his offer. Pornstache or not. 

“Pick anything you’d like, kitten,” he purrs, in an attempt at being seductive. 

“Well first off I’m not a furry so don’t call me that,” you snap with a self-assured grin. And then you start listing off the most expensive drinks on the menu. 

This man is so enamored by you that he buys you all of them. You’re three steps closer to alcohol poisoning when you clumsily stumble onto the dance floor along with him, running your hand over his jaw in what you believe to be a sensual manner. He seems to dig it, but from an outsider’s perspective the two of you look like junkies trying to get off. 

Your experience in the club is romanticized. The dim lights are reminiscent to those few times you’ve gone to a rave and it reeks of alcohol, overpriced perfumes and sweat. You and your nameless pathetic fan mingle with the grinding crowd and begin imitating them. 

As the poet Lady Gaga once said, “redlight pornographic dance fight”. 

The act itself is indifferent to you. From across the room, Taehyung locks eyes with you and you’re not really sure why but you feel this sudden need to provoke him, even when you know he most likely wouldn’t care. You sloppily kiss your suitor’s cheek while looking at him intensely from across the room. A red trail from your wet lips makes its way down his face.

For the sake of pettiness, you might’ve gone further—I mean, you were already playing some weird game of tug-and-war but with clothes—but you don’t want to know the feeling of this guy’s lips against yours. He finds the mostly innocent action as an invitation, though, and abruptly halts your staring contest with Taehyung by forcing you into a greedy kiss.

Pushing him away, you give him a pointed stare and rejection is clear on his face. “Excuse me…” 

He’s a terrible kisser. 

Pushing through everyone that’s in your way, you make your escape through the first door you find. In your intoxicated parade, you fail to make sense of the words ‘CLOSED’ that are so blatantly taped over the entrance. So, you find yourself in front of a swimming pool. 

The cold breeze outside prickles at your skin unpleasantly, and a quick look around tells you that there’s no one around to put this in their cringe compilation. Apparently more disgusted than you’d initially thought, you puke your guts out in front of the pool. Now light-headed and somehow empty, you stare at your vomit and take a deep breath. 

“Hey, why’d you run away?” Your suitor from earlier appears to have followed you outside. You stare at your feet—doesn’t he understand that you wanted to get away from him?

“You’re a bad kisser,” you say bluntly after getting over your little trance. 

“Give me a chance to change your mind then,” he offers smugly, taking menacing steps towards you. You move away instinctively before you’re quickly backed into a wall, with his two hands trapping you in between. 

Your eyes widen with fear and you sink into yourself. If you had anything else to puke out, you’re sure you would’ve done so at this point. “I have sharp nails and I’m not afraid to use them.”

“Oh, she bites-”

The events that play out next happen so slowly, you’re not sure why you’re surprised. Taehyung appears, and you do see him in your peripheral vision, stares for a bit before knocking the guy out with a punch to his temple. He falls unconscious on the ground.

“Oh god, did I kill him?” he asks, a vacant look on his face. He imagined his first kill to be more thrilling, but on second thought, he’s not sure why he was thinking about that without being under the influence of substances in the first place. 

“I’d be happy if he’s dead, if that helps,” you comment dryly. 

“Do we dump the body in the pool or what?”

The two of you are drunk enough to consider it. Your mind is blank for a bit, before you finally speak up. “I’m trying to think of what I saw on How To Get Away With Murder, but it’s not coming to me. But like, on Blacklisted, there was this guy who like, made the corpses turn to gas or something!”

“You watch too much TV. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s called The Blacklist.”

“Whatever. Do you know how to do that?”

“No.”

“Hey, what’s going on here?” A new voice cuts in.

“You better come up with something convincing or we’ll have to kill him too,” you urge.

“Did you say something?”

“No.”

“Umm, awkward believe it yeah,” Taehyung begins, a strong start. “This guy slipped on her puke and hit his head. And he has a concussion now.”

“Man, that sucks,” the guy says. You’re relieved that he’s as trashed as he is, otherwise the situation would’ve went really badly, considering how Taehyung straight-up lied to his face. “I’ll go call someone over ‘ere.”

Once he’s out of sight, the two of you stare at each other and decide to flee the country. But then change the plan with the more economically-efficient idea to simply leave the club. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Why were you with that guy anyway?” Taehyung asks. Frankly put, neither of you know where you’re going, but you’re boldly leading him through the artificially-lit streets of Las Vegas as if you’re born there. Where you end up is a concern your sober selves of tomorrow should worry about.

“I wanted to make you jealous,” you reply, bold, like everything you do when you’re drunk is. 

“...I don’t get it.”

“You pissed me off so much yesterday. And you made me jealous when you went out with that cashier. But also, you killed a guy for me, so I guess I’m not mad at you anymore.” 

“Well aren’t you high-maintenance,” he retorts sarcastically, gaining what feels like a confidence spurt because of your sudden confession. “You don’t have anything to be jealous of, anyway. The only thing I had on my mind during that stupid fucking date was you.”

You freeze up. You thought that your own attitude was what made any possibility of him returning your feelings seem laughable. Even if it’s drunk blabber, alcohol is an honesty elixir, at least in your case. “Kiss me?” 

He doesn’t need to be told twice, attacking your lips so eagerly you’d consider it funny if you were in a right state of mind. Still, your reciprocation is just as hungry, so maybe you don’t have any room to laugh. He is indulging you, after all.

The wipeout that happened at the club happens again and you’re left to wonder how things escalated. From teeth clashing against each other in pure excitement, you’re left hovering over Taehyung’s form and straddling him unsteadily.

He reaches under your already high dress and the glimpse of your panties seems to excite him. “You have no idea how much I’ve thought about this,” he admits breezily. 

You smile, a teasing one, adjusting yourself better. “You don’t need to be so dramatic about it, it’s just underwear.” 

“Dramatic is how many times I’ve jerked off after we went to the supermarket and you flashed me.”

“Ewwww, we shared a bed like three times, freak,” you scold and he pouts when you distance yourself from him. 

“I was just trying to be funny!”

“Not funny. Didn’t laugh. It’s better when you don’t talk,” you instruct before leaning down again to kiss him. At least he’s having fun with groping whatever he can get his hands on. 

“You’re so annoying it turns me on. Always whining, it drives me nuts how much I really like you.”

You snicker. “Well, I sure am feelin’ the love here.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

When you wake up, you register three things. Four, actually. First—your left shoe is missing. Second— Taehyung is knocked out cold next to you. Third—you don’t know where you are, except for the fact that there’s a garbage bin next to you. Fourth—your head is throbbing with pain and you’re so sore you’re not sure if you can walk. Needless to say, you had the wild night in Vegas you wished for in your bucket list, and you only half-regret it.

You see your shoe discarded near you and nudge it with your toe for a bit before finally gathering enough power to sit up and put it on. Or so you think, because the moment you’re propped in a standing position, you vomit like you did yesterday. 

Speaking of yesterday, the only thing you remember is that you and Taehyung were convinced that he’s now a murderer on the run, confessing your feelings for each other in an anti-climactic manner and then having like seven rounds of public sex. 

With a recap of yesterday’s events, you digress and put your shoe on before reaching in your purse. Surprisingly, you haven’t been robbed. Fishing your phone out, you come to the conclusion that you’ve been knocked out cold for way too long. 

Hoseok has generously spammed you with seventy texts, but you don’t bother to read them, already assuming that the gist is something about where the fuck you and Taehyung are. Instead, you call him immediately. 

“Hi,” you greet casually.

“[Y/n]! Where the fuck are you and Tae? We were so worried. Jin almost declared you two missing. But on the positive side, Jungkook didn’t care because he got food poisoning yesterday at the club.”

“I don’t know where we are, but he’s with me.”

“What do you mean?!”

“I’ll send you my location. I don’t have money for Uber, love you, kisses and hickeys,” you say in one breathe before hanging up quickly and doing what you said you’d do. 

At first, you thought this road trip was an opportunity for you to grow and mature. However, after yesterday’s shenanigans, you’re almost convinced your sociopathic tendencies are now higher by 5%. 

You start shaking Taehyung until he wakes up and swats your arms away. Now upon closer inspection, while you’re aware that you look bad right now, he’s not looking too hot either. The lipstick marks you had left on his face make it look like you’ve either slobbered all over him or that he’s a vampire, you’re not sure. And you’ve bitten him so much somebody could think he got attacked by a racoon judging solely on those bruises.

You quickly explain the situation to him as you’re fixing up your bra and top. Considering the fact that you were bordering on nip-slip territory, that was your priority. Smoothing your dress is easy enough, but your pantyhose is mysteriously ripped in some incriminating places.

He reaches out, rips out the fake eyelash that was pathetically hanging off the corner of your eye and throws it away. You take care of the other one, wipe off your ruined make-up and then wipe off the lipstick on his face. 

Your head hurts so much that you don’t know what to say to break the silence. Though you also don’t doubt that he’s in the position, and so, for the first time it doesn’t feel awkward between the two of you. 

“Hey, [Y/n], are we like… dating now?”

“I think so? You can be my date to the wedding if you want.” 

A dopey smile takes over his face. You realize you’ve made someone this happy before with merely being yourself. It fills you with a kind of warmth you’ve never felt before.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Your cousin won’t stop calling you,” Taehyung emphasizes as you’re pointedly ignoring your ringtone while you get ready. Considering the atrocious state both of you came back in, the process taking longer than usual shouldn’t be a surprise. Especially since you had to take turns for the shower.

Also the part where the two of you got into a fight over who should go in first—your thesis being arguably stronger once you mentioned the mud ingrained in the left sole of your feet—only slowed you down further.

“I know right? Can’t this pregnant moron get a life.”

“No, I think she’s calling you because we’re late to the wedding,” he elaborates. “You should pick up.”

“But I hate her!”

“You can roast her at the wedding and I’ll hype you up if you do what I ask.”

“Oh my god, promise?” 

“Promise.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Look who finally showed up,” your cousin greets you with a tight smile. You can only return the sentiment as Taehyung dumbly trails behind you. 

Well, as much as you don’t like your cousin, the wedding is certainly nice. With a light atmosphere and a fancy ceremony, he can’t pretend he hates it—that much is certain. Though he can also tell that it’s a lot of money wasted on food that doesn’t look appetizing in the slightest the more he examines the buffet.

“I see you’re not wearing the dress I shipped to you. Is it too tight, perhaps?” She’s smiling fakely and sweetly as she waits for your answer to her provocation. Of course it’s too tight; what else could it be when she picked it two sizes smaller than what you usually wear. And she did it on purpose too.

Despite the rather mundane conversation happening, the tension is thick.

“I’m going to be quick. You look like a greasy manatee.” You give her your own uptight smile before strutting away, cueing Taehyung to follow after you.

“Pregnancy-shameeeeed,” he yells out as he offers her finger guns and speed-walks in your direction. 

Once he’s caught up with you, he speaks up again. “I know you could’ve been more brutal than that.”

“Oh please, I’m sophisticated, I’d never engage in some barbaric behavior.”

You both burst out laughing at your blatant lie. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Do you think they’re dating now?” Jin asks, looking at the two of you as you dance and joke around. Though he imagines that you could only be having a deranged conversation, one that isn’t as sweet and lovey-dovey as it might look from an outsider’s perspective, it’s still quite disgusting how smitten Taehyung looks with you. 

“I don’t care,” Jungkook answers. Him saying he doesn’t care is a metaphor for how much he doesn’t care about anything after his food poisoning.

Jimin rolls his eyes. “Oh definitely. I saw them making out near a garbage dumpster when we were driving back to the hotel.”

Seokjin chokes.

[perreosolx]

Very saddened to finally realize that gerard probably just played with Bert frank and lynz’s feelings but also I cannot judge him and I even understand why he did it at some extent because I’ve literally done that to people too I think of it as not wanting/being ready to come out because maybe he doesn’t even really know for sure his own business so HOW would he explain it?? WHAT would he say?? I totally get that because I am in that territory myself, I haven’t come out to anyone really I mean I told a friend that i liked a girl a long time ago and she kinda did change her behavior around me ever since so that’s why I’ve been so reluctant to really really take that step plus I’m not sure about my gender AT ALL so that’s another thing, and based on my overall background regarding sexuality and gender I’ve never had like an official, serious, fr fr queer relationship, yeah I had that long distance entirely online thing with a girl when I was a teen and I’ve had one time flings but I haven’t been able to bring myself to take the bull by horns or whatever because a serious relationship would require actually going out in public places and introducing my friends and family and I just CAN’T I have SO MUCH to lose and I’m TERRIFIED so my guessing is that there’s a possibility that gerard feels a similar way, like ok maybe not because he’s gonna get thrown out of his parents house but maybe because he really didn’t want to come out and then be forever labeled as The Gay Singer from that band and thus have mcr become a Gay Band because you KNOW that’s exactly what the media would’ve done and honestly it just doesn’t seem fair for everyone else in the band, like I’m sure they probably wouldn’t really give a fuck to be called f*gs or stuff like that but the world just wouldn’t have taken their work as seriously as they have done and still do and they wouldn’t have had the success they did even if they just did the exact same fucking music because like it or not the world STILL is homophobic. Where I think he really really fucked up for no reason tho, was in not telling his own friends this, I really feel like he neve explained this to anyone like maybe MAYBE Mikey but who knows tbh? I feel like he just led both Bert and Frank on and when they wanted the whole deal, go public or something, he just cut them out of his life like some fuckboy, which is why Bert is Still Hurt to this day and why Frank wrote all that angry poetry, and ok I’m gonna allow myself to be annoying for a second here, those two? Doubtlessly in love, man. I honestly feel very strongly about this because looking at them, their interactions, Frank’s poems, their songs, just everything.... it reminds me of me and the girl I first fell in love with, this girl that ALSO played with my teenage confusion and led me on for years on end until I just Had to cut her out because it simply wasn’t letting me live my life, always waiting for her while she was away doing things and people I always had to find out from thirds, this awful feeling when she was away from me and then this divine feeling when we were together, this is what they remind me of. Frank’s longing and Gerard’s indecision. And after letting her go I just went back to dating men and presenting myself as a woman and it was fucking awful, everything about it felt Wrong until I found this boy, this beautiful man that is super artsy, constantly in touch with his femininity, unable to hurt a fly, so soft and funny and pure and wholesome and basically made of rainbows, you know...... like a girl. We’re engaged. But I always end up wondering, am I gonna marry him because I am in love with him or because he’s the closest thing to a girl I’m ever gonna allow my coward self to tie the knot with? It’s a thought that haunts me, because I really don’t know. Which then reminds me, wouldn’t you say Lindsey is a little masculine? With the tattoos and the style and the way she just carries herself with that ugly confidence only a heterosexual man can have? Her fingers must feel rough, I’m sure.

[exqui-thicc]

The Seven Seas Of Rhye (Queen AU) Chapter 1

Hi! Welcome to my new Queen fanfiction!

I hope you are gonna like it!

Freddie's P.O.V.:

I was in front of a lake, situated somewhere I didn't know. I was alone. I didn't recognize that place. I sat on the grass and then laid down. It was a starry night. Sometimes, I saw some shooting stars. Suddenly, I heard a noise. Like something had fallen behind me. I turned around and saw nothing. I began to be scared, wasn't I suppose to be alone? "Hello?" I tried. No answer. I turned back to the lake, saying to myself I was dreaming. But I immediately froze when I saw this dark distorted figure. I couldn't clearly see what it was, but it was terrifying. The thing approached me and began to stroke my hair. I was petrified, I didn't know what to do, I could feel my heart hitting my chest. "Come on, wake up, Freddie!" Said the thing in a wrong distorted voice. But I knew that voice, it seemed familiar to me. The figure began to shake me a little. And, then, I realized...

I slowly opened my dark brown eyes to see what was I thinking. My roommate Roger Taylor was waking me up.

"Come on, little groundhog, the Sun is already high in the sky~" He whispered with his soft voice that made me want to go back to sleep.

"Five more minutes, Rog..." I asked, groaning.

I heard Roger laugh a little.

"We are late Fred." He informed me in a serious tone.

Fuck! The University! I had completely forgotten! If the Sun was already high in the sky like Roger said, we were very late!

"The University, oh no!" I cried, jumped out of my bed, forgetting my sleep.

I ran to the bathroom, took a really quick shower and combed my long thick black hair.

"Roggie, why didn't you wake me up earlier?" I asked him as I ran to my wardrobe.

I took the first things I found, what wasn't in my habit.

"...Why didn't my clock ring ? Oh shit!" I dressed up in the most quick way I could do.

As I was going to put my school things in my bag and to leave the room, I realized that Roger was looking at me in a very amused way.

"Roger, darling, school began at 9:00AM, remember-" I didn't need to finish my sentence, I already felt really stupid.

Roger was still in pyjamas... We were in vacations... That's why my clock didn't ring! And it was 11:00AM!

Roger exploded of laughter.

"I'm gonna kill you!" I mumbled, feeling really shameful.

"Oh Fred, you should have seen your face! Totally falling into the panel." He giggled.

Roger is not gonna get away with this. I'm gonna make him pay what he had just done to me.

"Oh... You want to laugh, Taylor?" I innocently requested, as I slowly approached him.

"What-" I didn't let him finish his sentence: he was already tackle on my bed, with me tickling him.

"FRED- ST-STOP IT-T!" He stammered with his high-pitched voice, crying of laughter.

I didn't want to let him go, not after what he had done to me. An awful joke like that needs a punishment.

"OK-AH FREDDEH I P-PROMISE I-I WONT-T D-DO I-IT AG-GAIN! PLEAS-SE!" He begged, his baby blue eyes turning red.

What a pity! I reluctantly let go of him. He was fighting to catch his breath.

"I leave you this time, Taylor, but next time you do that, I'll kill you of laughter, understand?" I gently threatened him.

"Y-Yeah Fr-Fred!" He promised, big tears of laugh still on his face.

I collapsed on my bed, lying next to him. He looked at me. I looked at him. We began to do a look battle. My eyes began to burn, so I was going to close them, when, miraculously, a little dust landed in Roger's left eye. My blonde mate moaned and closed his two eyes at the same time.

"Loser!" I singed, very proud of me.

"I fucking hate you!" He laughed as he stroke his painful left eye.

Suddenly, the door of our room opened and my sister, Kashmira, appeared, looking at us weirdly. I immediately understand why.

"Roger, are you alright?" She asked, intrigued. "With these screams, I thought that Freddie was torturing you."

We both laughed. Yes, I was torturing him, but in a very soft way. But Roger answered Kash's question before me.

"No don't worry, actually we were working." What was he telling? Working? Seriously? With our postures we looked like we were doing anything except working! Roger was so stupid sometimes...

"Working?" Repeated my sister, absolutely not believing us.

"No, actually-" I began a sentence, but my blonde mate cut me off.

"Freddie needed to improve his arts' skills by drawing his best friend who was laughing... You know our facial features when we laugh are very complicated to draw-" It was clear for me, Roger was a very big idiot.

Kashmira rolled her eyes, annoyed.

"Whatever you two naughty boys did this morning, I just came here to tell my dear brother I was going to help mama at work today." She snapped.

"Nice holiday." I heard Roger mumble. Couldn't he just shut his mouth sometimes?

"That's alright, Kash!" I smiled. "Roger and me will probably go for a walk-" The blonde cut me off again.

""I" not "We", I didn't gave my agreement to go for a walk." He did a grimace. God I was going to kill him.

"Well, if you are seeking me, you know where to find me." Concluded Kasmira, as she left the room.

I thought that when my sister would left the room, Roger would get up and explain me why he woke me up. But nothing happened. He just began to lie under the cover of my bed and to fall asleep.

"God why didn't I have a bed as comfortable as yours!" He complained, as usual.

"I don't know, darling, I don't know..." I sighed, I didn't want to spend the entire day in my room, I wanted to go outside and to do somethings.

"Can I sleep here, tonight?" The blonde asked me.

"No." I retorted. "You don't know hard it was to get a mattress topper!" Shit! I shouldn't have said that!

Roger opened his big blue eyes.

"You have a mattress topper?" His face looked like he had seen a ghost. "HOW DID YOU GET IT? AND HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT I DON'T KNOW THAT?" He yelled in a high-pitched that destroyed my eardrums.

"Hush! Roggie! People will really think I am torturing you if you continue to scream like that!" I whispered. All this drama for a mattress topper?

"I don't care! I want a mattress topper!" He was so childish sometimes. "Do you know how is it to have a fucking backache every times you get up?" Fuck! He was doing the terrible puppies eyes! I couldn't say no to puppies eyes! "You are not that cruel Freddie, are you?" He mimed a fake sobbing noise. That bastard! I couldn't say no to that blonde messed up thing.

"Okay, you win!" I sighed. "Tonight, you sleep in my bed!" When I said that he began to giggle in victory. Why did I say yes already? I was going to regret it.

He collapsed on his- my bed and began to roll himself into the cover. But, suddenly, he looked like he realized something. He got up from my bed confused and lifted the blanket. Shit! I have forgotten that... Roger found a paper that I have "hidden" here. Actually, that wasn't very personal. It just was the map of that place that Kashmira and I created when we were young. For a long time, I used to see it every night, in my dreams, so I have drawn it to remember it.

Roger took the paper with a very confused face. He looked up at me, his blue eyes looking at me in a weird way.

"What's that?" He asked, sounding a little bit scared.

I began to laugh. Sometimes, I really thought that Roger thought I was a satanist or something like that.

"You can open it, Rog. It's just a drawing!" I assured him. He looked at me with a fake suspicion gaze, as he undid the rope of the drawing. My blonde mate unrolled the drawing and looked at it deeply.

"Rhye?" He rode. "What's that?" He asked curiously.

"It's a kind of a Kingdom that Kashmira and I invented when we were young. And, sometimes, I've visited it in my dreams" I told him.

"In your dreams? How the hell can you remember the dreams you do wben you sleep?" He demanded. Sometimes, I was worried for him.

"You know, not everyone has a strange brain like yours." I informed him.

"How dare you-" I cut him off, sometimes, I wonder why we are friends.

"Hush, Blondie, your brain doesn't have the capacity to understand some things." I snapped, sarcastically. Roger did a fake sullen look. I began to stroke his back softly.

"Don't worry, it's alright if you have nothing in your brain..." I provoqued him.

"Shut up!" He yelled, as he jumped on me.

He tackled me on the floor and he looked in my eyes. After a few minutes like that, I decided to interact with my strange roommate.

"What do you want to do today?" I asked him. It was 1:00 PM, and it's been two hours since we woke up and we did absolutely nothing.

"Go for a walk." He retorted. What?

"I thought that you didn't wanted to-" He cut me off one more time.

"I changed of mind, I want to go outside." He got up from me and began to walk to the door. "Are you coming with me?" He demanded, his hand and on the door handle.

I began to laugh hard.

"What's funny?" Roger requested, feeling a little bit ashamed, without knowing why.

"You are still wearing your pyjamas Rog!" I cried of laughter without any control.

He looked at himself and realized it. Roger wasn't blonde for nothing. (A.N. : I'm sorry...)

"Oh fuck it!" He moaned, laughing.

________________________________________________________________

Roger and I left the University and went for a walk in Kensington. During our first day of vacation, we usually go for a walk in Kensington Gardens. It was a tradition that we have created during our first year as roommates, in the University. The first of our first vacations, Roger proposed me to go for a walk in Kensington, for knowing each other better. We walked in Kensington Gardens a few hours and we became the two besties of the world. It has been two years that we are roommates, now. And I fucking thank the University for made me meet Roger. I really didn't know what could I do without him.

We entered Kensington Gardens and his daily beauty : his flowers, his trees and his green grass that made everyone want to roll himself into it.

In July, Kensington was under his best Sun. And it was more wonderful than the rest of the year.

Roger and I sat under a tree and began to relax ourselves. The University was finish and that was a big relief. I had my year with good grades, just like my blond mate.

As I was looking at the beauty of the landscape, Roger began to get up.

"Where are you going?" I asked him, sleepy.

"Seeking food. Do you want something?" He answered. I have just realized than I didn't have a breakfast and that I was very hungry.

"Yes, please Roggie, bring me whatever you want!" I laughed, answering his smile.

"I'm back in a few." Roger assured me, beginning to walk away.

When I was alone, I began to feel very sleepy and to slowly being taken away in my dreams.

I was in front of that lake, again. Roger wasn't there and I still didn't recognize the place. The distorted figure appeared again. It gave me his hand, but I didn't want to take it. I had a very bad feeling about it. Suddenly, a violent wind began to blow. "Be careful, Farrokh Bulsara, sometimes, wrong choices can create a disaster..." Said his strange voice. I didn't understand : how can this thing know my name? What was it? "Who are you? What do you want?" I wanted to know that badly. Why did this same thing comes visit me every time I sleep? Suddenly, the figure disappeared and I found myself alone in the dark.

I felt the bottom of my pants being pulled. I opened one eye to see a little cat trying to eat the bottom of my pants. It was so cute.

"Hi there, darling! Are you lost?" I asked to the little creature, as I began to gently pet it.

I looked up to the sky and I realized that the Sun had moved a lot. For God's sake! How many time did I sleep? Where was Roger? Why didn't he wake me up? That was weird.

I looked back at the cat and saw that he was pulling my jeans aggressively, like it wanted me to follow him. I got up and saw the cat running away.

I followed him, because I knew that it wasn't scared of me. If that was the case, it wouldn't have run in a specific direction, it would run everywhere and hide in a bush, like a normal cat.

The cat had me following him into the woods. Roger and I never went there, because we had always found this place creepy as hell. I hesitated to follow him, but finally I thought that if a cat brings me here, there was a important reason behind.

We walked through the woods for a long time and I still didn't understand why the cat was bringing me there. But suddenly-

"DON'T HURT ME, PLEASE!" That was definitely Roger! What was happening?

I followed the cat more quickly than before. The adrenaline made me forget how sleepy I was from my nap. I rushed after the cat, with my heart pounding in my chest.

Suddenly, the cat stopped running and I imitated him. There was a big abandoned park in the center of the woods. That was terrifying. I hid myself behind a tree and tried to identify Roger.

Not a long time after, I saw him. He was petrified. I looked in the way of his stare, and... Oh my God...

Was I dreaming or there were a big fucking ogre and with giant creatures? I would have asked my dear Roger, but, with the expression of his face, I had already understood. He was seeing the same things.

Then, everything happened too fast.

"HE IS THE ONE, CATCH HIM!" Ordered the ogre in a loud voice.

I wanted to scream to him to run with all my heart, but I didn't, I was too shocked for that. Roger was immediately tackled to the floor. Encouraged by seeing Roger in difficulty, the creatures ran to him. It looked like a fucking red ants invasion. They hung Roger's arms, legs-

"HELP! FREDDIE!" I heard him shout before the creatures put their dirty hands on his eyes, mouth and completely immobilized him. It was appalling!

"BRING ME HIS VOICE! NOW!" What? His voice? Have I missed an episode? Why did they want Roger's voice?

When I saw that big scary creature beginning to approach my poor terrified blond mate, who was trying to free himself from the creatures hands, I knew that it was time for me to act.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" I yelled as I stopped hidding behind my tree, without even thinking. I was stood with my hand on my hips, showing them I wasn't scared (even if it was the case multiplied by a thousand in my head). "OR I CAN ASSURE THAT I WILL..." Fuck! I haven't even thought about that, I was a freaking idiot. How would I fight an ogre which was actually ten times taller than me and an army of big red ants?

The ogre didn't even let me the time to finish my sentence. "CATCH HIM TOO!" It yelled.

Oh fuck! I didn't see that coming! Five big creatures were now running to me! I couldn't move, I was too scared for that. But when I saw this kind of big spider jumping on me...

"DON'T APPROACH ME!" I screamed. After a few seconds I realized that the spider wasn't there any more. Did I kill it? How?

I weirdly looked at myself, searching how did I kill this creature without even touching it. The ogre looked stupefied, but not as I was. I turned around to see that little cat from earlier being attacked by a creature. That made me angrier than ever. Why were they attacking a poor creature without any defenses like this?

I grab a stick and began to knock the monster out with all my might. What an injustice! Hurting a poor innocent cat like that! The cat stood up on his paws and began to purr when he saw me. That was maybe some recognition.

Suddenly, I felt a shadow above me. I was so busy with the cat that I hadn't heard the ogre approaching me. I had nothing to protect myself this time. He grabbed me by the arms and lifted me from the ground. It hurt so much! I moaned and clenched my teeth in pain, but also in fear. That ogre was so terrifying when we looked at him as close as I was. I first began to trying to free myself, but when I looked under me, I realized that it wasn't a good idea.

"I'M GONNA PUT YOU IN PIECES!" Exclaimed the terrible ogre, his voice reasoning into my ears too loudly, as it began to shake me in front of him. It was so painful, that I had tears which began to form into my eyes. My muscles were shouting to the ogre to stop.

It shook me and again, and again, and again, and again...

"AAAAAAAH!" I screamed in pain. When I screamed, a big light took form into my throat and attacked the ogre, which immediately let go of me, shouting.

Was I the one who did that again? I still didn't understand how. The ogre collapsed on the ground, unanimated. I felt exhausted as hell and I also didn't understand why. I jumped in fear when I felt a hand helping me to stand up. But, when I turned around, I saw my beloved Roger. How did he get rid of these creatures alone?

We jumped in each others arms and began to hug for two good minutes. "You're alright?" He asked me, worried. "I think that I am the one who just should ask that, Roger, what did you do to meet these things?" I answered by another question. "It's difficult... WATCH OUT!"

I had just the time to turn around when a big red ant jumped on me and tackled me to the ground. It began to pull my pants violently. So violently that he tore a part and ran away to the ogre, which finally got up, with the piece of my pants.

Roger helped me to get up, without looking away from the ogre. I did the same. It began to walk backwards, looking intimidated. "WE WILL MEET AGAIN, BOYS!" He assured to us, before suddenly disappearing with his creatures.

What had just happened already? I couldn't said to myself it was real because I didn't believe it. Suddenly I saw that Roger was staggering. "Roggie, are you alright?" I asked, worried about him.

"I don't know..." He quietly answered before fainting in my arms. What happened to him?

"Roggie..." I gently shook him, trying to wake him up, but without any success. I began to lift him and to take him in my arms. I'm gonna bring Roger back home... With the cat, of course!

________________________________________________________

"Farrokh, are you okay?" That was my father reaction when I told him about what happened to Roger and I. He wanted to bring Roger to the hospital, but I dissuaded him. I wanted Roger to tell me what happened to him when I was sleeping, first.

Roger was lying on our couch, still unconscious. I still didn't understand why he fainted.

"Papa! I know it's hard to believe it, but if I tell you that Roger was attacked by an ogre and big creatures that looked like red ants, which wanted to stole him his voice-" My dad cut me off.

"Farrokh, I don't know what Roger and you drank, but I can assure that what happened is not real!" He began to be angry. What scared me a little, relative to the ogre attack.

"Bomi, calm down, I can assure that our son looks very sober. Why would he invents something like that?" That was my mother, always here to calm the situation. I love her.

My father looked weirdly at me and then at the unanimated Roger next to me. "That's enough, boys!" He said, walking to the telephone.

I got up from the couch, trying to run after my father-

"Freddie..." My blonde mate called me with his sleepy voice. It was so cute. He felt that I wasn't besides him any more.

"I'm here, Rog, I'm here." I walked back to him and began to stroke his blonde hair, as he relaxed completely.

"Where are we, Fred?" He asked me, confused. Roger looked so disoriented.

"We are in my home, Roger, don't worry they can't hurt you here." I tried to reassure him. My blond mate immediately hugged me tightly and I did the same.

"Are you feeling any pain, Roger?" My mother suddenly asked.

"No, don't worry Mrs. Bulsara, I'm fine." He assured to my mother.

My father came back to the living room. "Oh, Roger you woke up." Papa casually said. "So, maybe you can explain to us what happen to Freddie and you, in a better way..." Why didn't my father believe me for God's sake! It was the authentic version, even if I couldn't believe it myself!

"No problem Mr. Bulsara!" Began Roger. "Actually, Freddie and I went for a walk in Kensington Gardens like we do every first day of vacations. We began to install ourselves under a big tree, when Freddie fell asleep. Realizing we didn't have any breakfast, I went seeking food, but the fast-food was closed. So, I was going back to Kensington Gardens, but I failed my way and found myself in the middle of the woods. After a few minutes of not finding the exit, I sat in a abandoned park, and that was when the ogre and his creatures attacked me." My blond mate debited all these informations in a few minutes.

"Okay, absolutely boys, it's okay, boys..." Responded my father, stunned, as he sat down on a chair, holding his head, like if it was about to explose.

"Papa, you must believe us, we are telling the truth!" I exclaimed, hopeless.

"Roger, do you want to call yours parents for telling them what happened and why you are here?" Gently, asked my mother.

"Don't worry Mrs. Bulsara, they are on a business trip, actually." Poor Roger. I knew his mother. If she found him telling a story like that, she was going to kill him verbally. "But, above all, you can congratulate your son for saving my life." He said with a wink. Oh no! How was I going to tell my parents that when I shouted, magic came from my throat? They were gonna think I was really mad.

But, instead of that, my mother smiled at me. "We are so proud of you, Farrokh. Finally, you see that boxing isn't useless!" I was so relieved, they thought that I have fought with my boxing skills. Even if I said that it was actually an ogre, which was ten times my size.

"No Mrs. Bulsara, actually he-" I quietly gave a small kick to Roger's ankle. I had been enough humiliated like that.

"I think that Roger and I will go to my room." I said, as I got up and pulled Roger by the arm, bringing him upstairs.

________________________________________________________

"Roger, what did you think? Telling my parents I have magic powers? They already think that I am crazy!" I got angry quietly, as my blond mate was looking at all the drawings on the walls of my room.

"You draw so well! You are so talented!" He exclaimed. Ugh.

"Roger are you listening to me?" I asked him, desperate.

"Freddie, if you want my advice, you should be very proud of you. Even if what happened is weird, you have saved my life!" He sat next to me on my bed.

"I don't know what to think about that..." I mumbled. "I still don't understand what happened and how I did... You know what... It never happened before." I quietly added. I was surely crazy, like my father said.

"Freddie... Don't listen at what your parents said." Advised Roger. So, he could read mind? "Fred... I think that I also did magic..." He confessed. That shocked me.

"H-How?" I asked, confused. He laughed when he saw my disturbed face.

"You know when the creatures tackled me to the ground?" I nodded "Well, while you were fighting the ogre, I don't know what I did, but I concentrated hard... And the creatures immediately released me..." He told. Incredible! If Roger was also magic, it was a big coincidence that we found ourselves in the same room at the University...

"Freddie, I think that I understand something." Suddenly said Roger. "Remember, I was very scared when the creatures attacked me and, after a few minutes, they released me. It was the same for you, I guess you were very scared when that ugly ogre lifted you by the arms..." He was right. If we really had powers, they triggered themselves when we were scared... Fuck! That was so weird!

My door slowly opened and Kashmira quietly penetrated the room.

"Boys, I heard what you were talking about and... I might be the only one who believes you..." Wow. Kashmira was talking to us in a serious way? What was happening?

"Kash, what do you mean?" I asked my sister, worried about her.

Kasmira looked at me and Roger. "Freddie, you know the drawings of Rhye we did when we were young?" She answered by another question, as she took her map of Rhye out of her pocket. "Well, first, I thought that I was dreaming, but, look at that boys." Kashmira displayed the map on the floor of my room. That was strange. This map looked really more detailed that the map we did when were younger. Then, she concentrated very hard and moved her hands above the map. Roger and I thought she was making fun of us.

But, suddenly the map began to have a reflect, like liquid water. That was clear, Kashmira was a wizard, exactly like us.

"Brilliant..." Roger said. "Scary, but brilliant..." He added, stunned.

"And take a look at this!" She quietly exclaimed, as she put her feet into the map, which really turn into a liquid thing. Then, all her body began to dug into the map.

"Kash!" I yelled in anticipation, my hand covering my mouth.

"Don't worry, Fred. You and Roger just have to do the same thing as me!" That was the last thing she said, before disappearing into the map. Roger and I looked at each other, swallowing difficulty.

"That's our destiny, Fred..." Said my blond mate before imitating what Kashmira did a few seconds ago.

When Roger had disappeared, I did the same thing. It was a so weird sensation. Like if I was drowning into quicksand.

When all my body passed the map, I collapsed into the greenest grass I have ever seen. I slowly looked up and saw Kashmira and I's dream world. There was the White Queen's castle in front of us and I could also see the Troll Mountains behind. It was so more wonderful than in my dreams.

Roger's eyes were widened. Even if he didn't know that place as good as Kashmira and I knew it, he seemed amazed by the landscape.

"That's wonderful I-" I tried to do a sentence, as I began to walk to the White Queen's castle. But Kashmira grab me by the wrist.

"Freddie, it could be dangerous to go further now, if someone sees us as the stranger we are, we will probably finish our days into a jail!" Kashmira warned me. She was right and we also couldn't left mama and papa alone, even if this landscape was the most beautiful of the world... Oh yes, I forgot, Rhye wasn't in our world. In our world, there only were works and University.

"And how can we leave this place, Kash?" Asked Roger.

My sister giggled. "Nothing more simple than to jump!" She exclaimed at the same time she jumped and disappeared into Rhye's sky. I reluctantly did the same thing. A few seconds later, we were back in my room.

"That's so fantastic-"

BOOM !

Roger was interrupted by a big noise coming from downstairs. Shit ! Mama and papa were there, what was happening. Kashmira, Roger and I immediately went down the stairs. And then-

"HERE THEY ARE!" This terrible ogre and his creatures were back! How is it possible? How did they found us? The ogre was looking right at a terrified Roger, who couldn't move any more, frightened by the fear. And above all this disaster, a new monster made his apparition and it was a blue troll, probably the most terrifying of all the monsters here.

When I looked closely to the troll, I understood how they found us so quickly. The troll had the part of my pants in his hand, and if we listen to what I rode when I was younger, the troll had a very good sense of smell. They arrived here because of me. God, I felt so stupid right now.

My poor parents were trembling like hell in each others arms. They didn't have the right to hurt them. But Roger seemed more reactive. He gathered all his courage and kicked the troll in the face.

The troll groaned in pain, as he held the part of his face where Roger had kicked.

"WHAT AN IDIOT! HURT BY A BLONDIE!" Got angry the ogre.

"Yes, but I'm not whichever Blondie!" Retorted my blond mate, in provocation.

That made the monsters entered in a big anger. "Freddie! Kashmira! They are too numerous, we need to separate them!" That was right. I didn't know that Roger could be smart, sometimes.

"I have a plan!" Proposed my sister. "Roger, you make diversion with the ogre, Freddie, try to get away the big red ants, and I will try to call down the troll, right?" We didn't have more time to think for another plan.

"Right Kash!" Roger and I said together.

I ran to the red ants. "By here, my darlings!" I coaxed them and they immediately followed me without any hesitation when I precipitated myself outside. Okay, nice, and now, what should I do to get rid of them? I didn't even had the time to think that the troll collapsed on the creatures. Alright then.

Then, I saw a saucepan with four legs made his way towards me. What was that? The saucepan adhere my legs from behind. I lifted the saucepan and found my beloved cat hidden inside.

"Nice armor, darling!" I giggled before put the saucepan back on the ground.

Exactly at the same time I was thinking that we were going to be okay, Roger crossed violently the glass of the living room's window, breaking it.

"Oh my God, Roggie, are you alright?" I ran towards him, there was some big pieces of glass embedded in his skin and he was bleeding a little at some places.

"Don't worry Fred, I'm alright-" The big ogre got out from the house, by destroying the door at the same time.

"I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU, BLONDIE!" He yelled, looking excited. He grabbed Roger with his big hand.

"ROG!" I shouted in anticipation. Roger was literally squirming against the big dirty hand of the monster.

"HELP ME! FREDDIE! KASHMIRA! SOMEONE HELP!" Screamed my blond mate in fear.

"THAT'S ALRIGHT I'M JUST GONNA BRING YOU TO RHYE, LITTLE BLONDIE, SOME PEOPLE NEED YOURSELF!" No, no, no that couldn't finish like that! I couldn't leave that monster taking my best friend away like this, in front of my eyes!

"PUT HIM DOWN IMMEDIATELY!" Ah. There was Kashmira. "WE HAVE ALREADY PUT YOUR TROLL K.O., WE CAN DO THE SAME THING WITH YOU!" She yelled to the ogre. Wow. She beat a troll herself... With Roger, we were two and didn't even touch the ogre.

"WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO LITTLE ONE?" Provocated the ogre, laughing. My sister didn't break the eye-contact, when she leaned down to me.

"Sing, Freddie!" She ordered me. I didn't understand. Singing? Really? How can my sing destroy an ogre like that? "Come on Fred, don't ask any questions and sing your heart out!" I gulped, I really didn't know how can this help, but whatever, I made confidence to my dear sister.

"AY-OOH!" I yelled. That was weird. I felt something forming into my throat.

"Continue Freddie!" Encouraged my sister.

"DE DOH DE DOH DE DOH DE DOH DE DOH!" I felt the thing in my throat growing. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY-OH!" I shouted with all my heart and a shiny thing escaped from my throat and hit the ogre right in the chest. He stumbled a little before completely collapsing on the ground. It was incredible, if I had a magic power, it was... My voice?

With Kashmira, we helped Roger to free himself from the ogre grip. This time, he didn't fainted, but he looked very hurt, with the pieces of glass everywhere on him.

The ogre tried to get up, but without any success. "WE WILL MEET AGAIN, I PROMISE!" He assured to us, before disappearing with the troll.

This time, I think that mama and papa will believe me and Roger.

__________________________________________________________

While mama and Kashmira were healing Roger, I had a discussion with my father, as we were cleaning the living room. He finally believed me, but was also really worried about me, Kashmira and Roger. He didn't want them to attack us again and I understood him, but now that I identified the origins of my power, I could protect myself a little bit better than before.

"And also Farrokh..." When papa began a sentence like that, it usually not good. "Kashmira told me that she found a portal to go to the kingdom you invented when you were children... And... She envisaged to go explore it with you and Roger." Oh my God! That was so great! I couldn't imagine it! I have always wanted to go to Rhye, but I didn't know that my sister had a free access to go there, without any limits! "Farrokh, I want you three to think clearly about the decision you will take, you saw it by yourself, there are dangerous things there and you could get hurt..." I began to get really worried about us.

"Don't worry, Mr. Bulsara!" Suddenly said Roger with bandages wrapped around some parts of his body. "I will make sure your two children are okay and don't make bad things." I wanted to explode of laughter. If there was someone who can't retain anybody to do that, it was Roger! He is usually the first to create the bad idea, where everybody get hurt.

"So, you are ready to go into our dream kingdom, Fred?" Asked Kashmira in a determined way.

"More than ever!" I assured to her.

My sister began to concentrate and to move his hands in a weird way. After a few seconds, a ball of light appeared and opened a portal to another dimension. My magic dimension. Rhye.

"Please children, be careful!" Cried my mother, as she threw herself in Kashmira and I arms.

"Don't worry, mama, we will communicate with you and papa as soon as we can!" She gently reassured mama

We all turned around, facing the portal.

"Ready Freddie?" Asked Roger.

"Yeah, let's go!"

Kashmira went into the portal first, then Roger and finally, me. Before going into the portal I waved to my parents, I was going to miss them so much. But, I left my body being carried by a big shiny magic tornado.

It was the beginning of a new departure...

[whats-the-story-tc]

14th of February, 2020

“The One with the Long Way Home”

[THIS IS GONNA BE REALLY LONG, CUZ A  L O T  WENT DOWN, BUT THE ENDING IS REALLY GOOD. PROMISE.]

Another day, another flannel. And y’all know what’s funny? Yesterday, I said V has a shirt similar to what I wore. A day later, she puts it on. I hate her.

Physics first thing in the morning, and the teacher asked me to fetch some tests that we left in our classroom. As I went outside, and looked towards the teachers’ corridor, I spotted an oddly familiar wristwatch on an oddly familiar hand. I step back a little, so I can see the person in question better. Bingo, it’s V — and she was cutting paper. Blood froze in my veins as I walked away. I didn’t remember her promising us a test. Seconds later, I remembered that one of the younger boys I know from rehearsals told me they’re writing a test in V’s class, in second period. Thank God. 

English with V. Turns out, she did have some papers for us, too, but it was only classwork. Didn’t take a minute to recognise the metaphors in the exercise. Meanwhile, V took her dice out of her pocket, twirling the bag in her hands and fiddling with its strings. “Uh-oh...” I muttered. “I’m just playing with it, don’t be scared.” she told me, with the trademark half-smile.

Turns out, my solutions were all correct. Sometimes, I explained them to a confused Art Friend before V could, but she didn’t seem to mind much. I think she’s used to me not having much control over my words. She lets me speak. But when she did get into full-blown story mode, when Know-It-All asked her something... things got interesting. V, sitting on the edge of her desk, looked at him when she started speaking — then turned to me. As in, looked me directly in the eyes all the while she was explaining whatever she was explaining, for about half a minute or so. It wasn’t easy to keep eye contact, but I managed somehow. I’m getting better at it. When she finished, she looked back at him briefly, before walking back to the blackboard. I didn’t know what to make of it. I still don’t. It’s been two days since, and I get butterflies thinking about it.

V asked us if we could recognise what kind of stylistic thingamajig this one quote was. After thinking a lot, as I recognised it, I just couldn’t find the word, I blurted out: “Metonymy!” “Why?” V asked me. “Cuz that’s what first came to mind!” I surprised V to a grin, the rest of the class laughing as well. “I wish it worked like that.” she said.

But here’s the funny part. Know-It-All had no idea what hoarfrost meant (it was in one of the quotes), and thought it was a plant. The look on V’s face... if eyes could kill, he would’ve turned to ashes. The poor woman was shocked. She fully pulled out her phone, googled that shit, and walked up to him with the image search results on her screen. I think Incessant Questions Guy also asked to see it, and, though I don’t remember everything she said, she definitely called him “City Kid”. I was howling with laughter. 

Then I noticed. V types with only her right hand. The same way I do. I raised my hand immediately, and asked her “Sorry, off-topic question, but did I notice correctly that you type with only one hand, Miss?” I think she thought I was gonna call her out on it, because she said “Yeah. That’s what I got used to.” “Finally someone!” I answered. “I spent my whole life getting picked on for this!” She didn’t say anything, but someone else did. “Another similarity.” said Comparison Boy. Oh, the irony. Out of all people, it’s her having this in common with me. I think it would be easier to list our differences than what we have in common.

After V called Blonde Boy in the Back out on him doing fuck all in class, he didn’t take it very well. As we were waiting for our next class, I overheard him tell his friend “What’s going on with this [V]? She’s a dick, that one.” I had to physically remove myself from there so I didn’t say anything. Does discipline immediately mean someone is a dick these days? I’m afraid for my generation.

I don’t remember where my mood started going downhill. It must have been around homeroom, where things got pretty serious. Serious as in my stomach still sinks thinking about it. 

V’s presence in the next period made it slightly better, but didn’t solve things completely. “You know what’s funny?” she turned to me and Pocketwatch Friend, after I said that the other class should get their own loudspeakers (which, as V informed me, they did). “That [this one teacher] thinks yours is free property! [The one she was plugging in] is the other class’, as they took yours, then [another class] took it elsewhere, and then [that teacher] took it like it was free property!” Bless her soul, she was so riled up.

Now, because these loudspeakers were a little different, V had to choose a different spot to sit. That very spot was the other side of the desk in front of ours  — placing V in a way where she was facing me directly. Meaning I actually had to watch the film. As soon as Tatyana appeared with that extra ass hairdo, I said “Shame about that hair,” making V grin and repeat it immediately. And, when I pointed out that Tatyana is the only one wearing colour, my favourite absolute unit of a woman paused the film just talk about it, calling it a “good discovery”. I feel valid.

After class, I thought I’d be cute and help her out a little, and unplug the loudspeakers, as well as take them back to their original place, receiving a “many thanks” for it. As I told Pocketwatch Friend, whom I dragged with me, “I wouldn’t carry anyone else’s shit.” Not true, cuz I help everyone and their mothers cuz I can’t say no, but anyway. When I went back to our classroom, V was still there, giving the Onegin tests back to my classmates. Naturally, I went to check mine. “It’s always the names!” I said, looking at what I got wrong. “Always...” I heard quietly from the other side of the teachers’ desk. V wasn’t surprised. What did surprise her, however, that the actress playing Olga, Lena Headey, is the one playing Cersei in Game of Thrones. When Art Friend and I told her, she started grinning, all wide-eyed. “I didn’t even get that! You learn something new every day.” She was still grinning about it when she walked away.

After that, I started to think about graduation, totally randomly. What happens after. If V and I will stay in contact. How could I possibly ask her something like that. I kept spiralling into things, and took the longer way home, thinking more and more, until I pushed myself to the verge of tears for absolutely no reason at all. Honestly, though. I still don’t get why I did that. There wasn’t a reason. 

But let me tell you what there was this evening — a school dance. There is always one towards the end of winter. And once I finished training, I ventured into the crowd. The day couldn’t end with me crying alone at home and writing a sad post on it. I wouldn’t let it. And this is where Fate kicked in, as everything, that happened from then on, was a string of coincidences aligning a very particular way, too particular for it to be coincidences anymore.

I walked around in circles, eyes sharp, making small talk with a couple people along the way, looking for her, but not finding her anywhere. But... that couldn’t be. Every teacher was here, even the ones who never attend anything. There was no way she wasn’t somewhere among all these people. And as I made my way deeper into the crowd, I spotted a familiar shirt. She was sitting in the very front row. A judge. Every class has to present something, you see, as there’s a contest every year, judged by teacher. Well chosen, I thought to myself. V always sees everything.

But this also meant, that if I wanted to talk to her, I’d have to stay until everyone is done, with either a dance or a video. Am I seriously staying until I haven’t spoken to her? Maybe. Fuck it, I’ll do it. You only live once. - I texted to Pocketwatch Friend. Are you sure this is what you want? - she replied. And no, I wasn’t. No matter what was happening, my eyes were on V. The scoring paper in her hand, the pen in her mouth, the way her shirt collar was open, exposing the nape of her neck... unreachable, now physically, too. On the verge of crying, I waited for my Dad to stop talking to my coach so we could leave. I couldn’t take another minute of this.

Outside, I told Dad that I wanted to walk the long way ‘round home, because “today has been a lot” and “I want to think”. Then Dad posed me a good solution, so I wouldn’t be alone: “Why don’t you walk me home then?” As soon as he told me there was cake at theirs, I was sold. I hadn’t eaten in a while by then, and I would’ve needed some energy for crying anyways, so it definitely felt like a good solution. And it definitely was good cake, even though I nearly teared up at the dinner table about five times.

It’s time to get going, and Dad offered to accompany me until I’m about halfway home. And when he left, I got an idea. I couldn’t simply walk past school without being sad, so... why not go back inside? I could still wander around on the dark streets, listen to sad music and cry afterwards, if I wanted to. But, as I said before, I wasn’t about to let the day end like that. And as long as there was even just half a percent chance that there would be a happy ending to my night, I owed myself that chance to try. I’ve gone mad. - I texted Pocketwatch Friend on my way back. And even though she was trying to talk me out of it, I told her to tell me one reason why I shouldn’t, aside from the pain. It has hurt before. I could take it. But I knew that no matter what she said, she couldn’t talk me out of it. I was already at the corner of the building. I was going inside.

I walked up to the bridge, and ran into Art Friend. Thank God, someone I knew, someone I could talk to about what was wrong! And, of course, she wasn’t the only one there. There V was, just so my heart could hurt even more, stood at the railing, not looking up from her goddamn phone. Now that I saw her, I suddenly wasn’t so brave anymore. I didn’t want to bother her, so I chickened out of going up to her, even though Art Friend tried to talk me into it. I refused and refused until V walked away. Fantastic. I’m literally so fucking stupid

We kept talking for about ten minutes after that, Art Friend and I, both of us venting about our love-related woes to the other, and chatting with a few other people along the way. I didn’t know whether I should stay or go, I felt absolutely hopeless and confused at that point. Nothing made sense. After asking my poor friend about five times whether I should stay or go, I decided to stay. At least until she came back. And she did come back.

V and A walked down the stairs together, both of them joining the people standing at the railing as the band, comprised entirely of students, was setting up downstairs. Now’s my time, I thought, and went closer to where V was standing. One of the teachers, who used to be my homeroom teacher at about the dawn of time, noticed me standing behind her, and offered to swap places with me so I could see better, which would’ve put me even closer to V, who was, for your information, still on her goddamn phone. I politely refused, but she wouldn’t have it, and so, I wound up directly at the railing, my Art teacher next to me, V just slightly behind us. I think you can guess how nervous I was.

I ended up talking to my Art teacher, discussing some stuff in a couple sentences. Bless, she’s the best person to talk to when you’re nervous, as she’s a right laugh. And then. V came closer, bumping into the Art teacher’s feet as she did. The latter barely even noticed, even though V said sorry, so V tapped her shoulder to say sorry again. And there we were. The music started, V wound up between us, so now, she was standing directly next to me. Jesus bloody Christ. So much for a healthy blood pressure.

Listen, guys. We all know V is clever. She knew why I was still wearing my coat. She knew why I was standing there and she knew why I was so nervous and why I didn’t say a word to her. That might be why she decided to speak first. The music was loud, so she leaned closer and just told me “Look at those two stupid seniors in the corner,” referring to two boys dancing in this classical, wobble-your-shoulders kinda club dancing style. She even imitated it, making me laugh, but she was grinning too. Down by the stage, the people started a train dance, which V just commented as “Unbelievable,” still grinning. Meanwhile, I thought it unbelievable that I’m the one she started talking to when I haven’t seen her speak to anyone else all night.

“How were the performances from the first row?” I asked her, subtly referring to the fact that I saw her earlier. She leaned closer again, hand in front of her mouth like she was saying something confidential, and told me “To be honest, I was a little scared of the girls dancing hip-hop.” “Who, the younger kids?” I asked her, laughing. “No, no, the guests.” Yeah, I probably missed those. Anyway. “And how was our clip?” I continued. “I thought there were too few of you in it, but it was really well edited.” “Yeah, [Boy who filmed it] is talented at this. I was only in it, so I didn’t have to go to P.E.” And as the band started playing a new song, I told V “[They’re] really good.” “Yeah, I want to film them.”

And she did. Understandable, I think she teaches half of them, and they were really good. After that, there was silence. She pulled out her phone, and, as far as I’m concerned, she was texting, meanwhile I got a few words with A who was standing nearby, and took photos myself. I decided, that when the song ends, I’ll leave. I got way more than I hoped for, anyway.

“I think I’m gonna go now.” I turned to V, once we gave them the applause they deserved. “Alright.” “And you, Miss? Are you staying until the end?” “Well, I have to.” “And why is that?” Maybe this one I shouldn’t have said, as it was painfully fucking obvious. “I’m supervising.” “Oh. Well, then, have a good weekend.” “You too.” “And keep holding on.” “Thanks.” My Art Teacher waved to me, smiling, as I walked away, and I waved back. Yeah. There’s a bit of a difference between how I like her and how I love V.

I went downstairs to say goodbye to Art Friend, and, just before I left, I looked back up at V, who was smiling. I’m not certain anymore, and I don’t want to write misinformation, but in that very moment, I could’ve sworn she was looking at me.

I no longer needed to take the long way home, I went my usual way. Even so, I burst into tears, but those were of relief. I trusted my gut, went through with it, and my night ended really well. Then I spent the rest of that night and the next morning calling my friends and telling them in even more excruciating detail what happened between V and I. To be honest, it still doesn’t feel real.

See, I still don’t know if there even is a V and I to begin with. But something has definitely changed in the past weeks, I feel it. But I’ll leave this up to you to judge. All I know is that I’m over the moon. Good luck trying to get me off.

~ S ♡

[Every story I share here, no matter how specific I get with my wording, depicts actual events from my own life.]

[allelitelady]

Brother Feud

I could never decide which Buck i found more attractive. It often changed day by day. You have Matt, tough as hell, the older one, but also so sweet and giving to people he came across. And then you have Nick.. cocky, cool, his calm, collected attitude was so drawing to me.

When they recruited me from ROH when they started AEW it was an easy yes. I had a huge role in production at ROH, but the thought of doing something on a bigger scale national level was so exciting i could never pass that up. Being on the production team with AEW meant a lot of time spent with not only Nick and Matt, but Cody, Brandi, and Kenny too. I felt like I had great rapore with all of them but with Nick and Matt there was always some type of back and fourth, inside jokes, and a lot of flirting. But never when both of them were present, it was only when I was alone with one of them.

The jokes with Nick were borderline dirty flirting. Talking about sex, how we were both in dry spells, and how he could do wonders for me. Where with Matt it was more like how beautiful i looked that day, and how great I am. Either way both of them have stolen a little piece of me and I'm not sure they even realized it.

____

"Wow, who are you trying to pick up tonight?" Nick asked as I got into the Uber he was already sitting in. "What are you talking about?" I said as I got into the car carefully not to expose too much. The low cut black bodycon dress was perfect for being in Vegas and going out. After all it was Double or Nothing weekend, the crew arrived Thursday and we decided to go out that night, obviously we couldnt do it Friday with the show the following day. The whole roster rented out a space at Palms casino right off of the strip to celebrate the first pay-per-view under the AEW name. "A little revealing don't you think?" "Are you getting possesive Nick Jackson?" you say sarcastically shocked. "What if I am?" he asked. You laugh and shrug him off, although it made you feel really good. "I'm being serious" he says, and his tone changes. You turn your body to face him a bit, "Well then maybe I'm trying to pick up you tonight" He smirked at you as the car stopped and we arrived at our destination. I could see Matt waiting for us. "Thank you" we both say to the uber driver and get out.

"Whoa!" Matt says, "Better not bend over" he adds and starts pulling at the bottom of my dress. His hands being so close to certain areas makes me nervous. "Stop!" I say flicking his hand away. "You two are way overprotective of me! How did I get so lucky" you say rolling your eyes. Nick walks close to me as well as Matt. "Let's go get you a drink" Nick whispers into my ear. I smile and almost laugh, typical way of him flirting with me.

You stand at the bar chatting it up with Joey Janela, maybe getting a little flirty putting your hands on his arm. After chatting with him for less than 5 minute I feel a hand on my arm "Excuse us a minute brother" Matt says.

He pulls you a couple feet away, "What the hell was that?" he asked. "What are you talking about?" As you get defensive. "You were all over him" "Like hell I was Matt" you say even more annoyed. "You're being a fucking tease" he says as you try to walk away. He cursed. He just cursed towards you, sweet, gentle Matt cursed at you. You're still in defensive mode, you scan the room and see Nick already staring at the two of you. You lock eyes with him and he immediately gets up knowing that you probably need him. "Fuck off Matt, it's not like i'm your girlfriend or anything" you say, and your words stung him a little and he didnt even realize they would. You leave and make a b-line to Nick who is already approaching you.

"What the hell is going on?" he tries to shout over the loud music. "Matt is being all possessive and shit, telling me i'm a fucking a tease!" you shout near his ear. He backs out and looks at you confused. "Come on let's go outside" he says, He takes your hand and you follow him where you don't have to shout.

"He's probably just had too much to drink." he says in a normal tone. "I've had a lot to drink I'm not making any judgements" you say, "I was literally talking to Janela for 5 minutes and he comes over pulling me away." "It's alright y/n" Nick says pulling your hips over towards him and then wrapping his arms around you. "I'm still pissed at him" you say into Nick's chest. "I know a way you can take your anger out" Nick whispers into your ear, his hands moving down towards your ass and soon enough he cups it and you start to get excited. You know what he's suggesting, but you play along "I might need your help" you whisper back and you can feel his erection growing against you. He backs out so he can see your face, he can see you're being serious and at this point the dirty flirting, he's been wanting you for months now. He had a feeling his brother might be into you also, but he just blew that. "I'm gonna call an uber" he says with a smirk. "That's a really good idea" you say.

Are you really about to do this? All the nights you moaned both their names while pleasuring yourself. Thinking of all the possibilties of sleeping with either of them. Nick didn't really leave a lot to the imagination with the way you two talked. As you're riding in the uber back to your hotel with Nick your phone goes off and it's from Matt. Nick puts his hand on your bare thighs, "don't even look at your phone" he says moving his hand further up, you look over at him and smirk as the look in his eyes is so intense.

We get back to the hotel room as soon as the door closes, he jerks your hips towards him puts his hand behind your neck and kisses you. Finally the kiss you've been yearning for all these months. You feel your body hit the bed and suddenly Nick is on top of you. You pause for a moment, "If we do this Matt can't know, at least not right away" "Okay, fine." he continues to kiss you and then you feel his hand hiking up your dress, tossing your wet panties that have been like that ever since you were outside the Palms. “Damn, you got this excited for me? Nick says, that cocky attitude of his really showing. “Not the first time.” You say with a smirk. He raises his eyebrows curious, he starts to wonder how many times you’ve masturbated thinking of him, because he knows he’s done that several time with your image in his mind. He slides his body down, his mouth so close to your clit, the heat from his breath makes you squirm. “Now you’re the tease” you say wanting to push his head against you. He smirks at you know you’re not really ready for him. Once he starts using his tongue you’re blown away, when he starts to use his fingers you lose it. “I’m going to cum Nick” you say grasping the sheets beside you. “Cum for me then” he says. Within seconds you climax and let out a loud moan, not caring who the hell could hear you. That release you’ve needed for months has finally come. He gives you a second to catch your breath before you know it he’s turned you over so you’re on your hands and knees and he’s putting his thick cock into you. “Fuck Nick” you pant. He talks dirty to you, making you beg him for his cock, making you say his name, etc. “Baby I’m gonna cum” he whispers in your ear because at this point your basically flat on your stomach while he goes at you. You both climax at the same time, he rolls off of you onto his back on the bed. Your roll over and look at him, his chest rising as he’s out of breath himself. He looks over at you and smiles while breathing heavily then turns his head back to stare at the ceiling. “Wow.” He says. I hope that is a good wow is all you can think of in your head. He looks at you again and you look back at him, "I've been waiting for this for a long time." he admits, he rolls over and strokes your face then softly kisses your lips. "I should've done something about it sooner, but I really was afraid you were into Matt and not me..." You pull his lips back down to kiss him, "I've had some serious feelings for you too..." you admit. "But ..I have this weird relationship with Matt, there's attraction but it's nothing like how I feel about you." you tell him to reassure him. "Well at least you're being honest." he says still looking into your eyes. "that's why you don't want Matt to know right now?" You shake your head yes, "Like a week tops, just to figure out what I'm going to say." "You know it doesn't have to be you, I can straight up tell him." "I just want to take care of you." Nick says. "Oh you've taken care of me" you say and you both smile and let out a little laugh.

You both end up falling asleep that night in your hotel room, Nick's arm draped across your body. And then suddenly a pounding on the door startles the both of you. "Ugh what the fuck" you say. "I'll take care of it" Nick says groggily getting up out of bed, he puts on the jeans he had last night, still shirtless and goes to the door. "Calm down" he shouts as the person on the other side keeps pounding on the door. Nick opened the door and on the other side was Matt. "Oh hey man, whats up?" "What are you doing in y/n's room?" "Uhhh, i just ended up crashing in here last night. After i brought her back to the hotel after you busted her balls, she was pretty upset man." Nick says still standing in the door way. "So you brought her back and fucked her then right?"

You quickly get up out of bed, really glad you put on some clothes to go to bed last night. "What the fuck Matt" you say. "I got this, just go back to bed" Nick says. "No I'll take care of it, you say going under Nick's arm to talk to Matt outside of the door.

Nick closed the door, of course still listening from the other side. "So you flirt with Janela, and then fuck my brother? Great y/n, just great" "First of all, my love life is my own personal business. When did you start caring so fucking much?" He looks at you disappointed and shakes his head. How are you supposed to know that he has feelings for you?? He just acted like a platonic friend most of the time. "I guess I should've spoke up" he says.. "I just wanted to come and apologize for last night, that's all I guess" he says.

But you get the feeling that he wanted to apologize and share his actual feelings.

[oohfluffy]

LMN Ch.3 | OSH

Group: EXO

Member: Oh Sehun

Theme: Angst | Fluff | Writer!AU | Neighbor!AU

Word Count: 2,368

✎ Chapter 3: EX ✎

"No way, man. No way. Stay away from my noona."

Chanyeol shook his head as he hit Sehun's arm.

"What? You're the one who tells me about her books and stuffs. Now that I'm asking about her, you're declining?"

"I know that kind of question, bro. You're gonna hit on my sister." Chanyeol rolled his eyes as he watched Sehun lay down on his bed as if he's at their own house.

"I'm not! I'm just curious. She seems..." Sehun bit his lower lip as he thought of the first time he saw you. "...distant? Beautiful but it's like she has walls built around her."

"I don't know what you're talking about but please," Chanyeol stared into his best friend's eyes. "stay the hell away from her."

"You're creeping me out. Is there something I need to know—"

"None that you should know. Anyway, let's work on that project that's due..." Chanyeol trailed off as he flipped the pages of his notebook. "...oh shit. The deadline's fucking tomorrow!"

Sehun lazily stood up to get the materials needed back at his house.

"I'll just get my things and we can work on it here. Is that alright?"

"Yeah, that'll be great. Move fast, okay?!"

Sehun closed his door and was about to walk downstairs when the door in the end of the hallway opened.

You had your toothbrush in your mouth as you scribbled on your notebook while walking back to your room, which is just located across of the bathroom. Sehun stifled a laugh as he saw you. You seemed to be in your own world, not even noticing his presence. He watched as you walked back out of your room to continue brushing your teeth in the bathroom with your eyes wrinkling in happiness.

"Cute." He mumbled with a grin as he took a last glance at you before going downstairs.

You went out of the bathroom as you breathed out in relief.

"Next chapter will be..." You wondered out loud as you walked back into your room. "The guy finally met her, so..."

What will happen next? Should the guy make a move already?

"Maybe?" You muttered as you sat back down on your chair.

As you leaned your head back on the chair, you tilted your head towards the window beside you.

The lights are on?

A broad back suddenly appeared in your sight, making your eyes widen. The white shirt he was wearing was fit and since he was putting a lot of materials inside a bag, you see how his back flex whenever he moves.

And of course, he suddenly turned around and saw you gapping at him.

Sehun waved at you with a smirk.

Your cheeks flushed as you quickly pulled your blinds down, hands slightly trembling in panic.

"What the hell. His room is just..." You groaned in annoyance as you shook your head. "What a pain."

You blinked as you saw a little notebook laying on top of your books.

That seems familiar.

You went to get it and open it as you sat back down.

| "Dear Diary" |

Sehun watched as you disappeared in his sight, chuckling as he saw your panicked expression.

"I wanna know more." He mumbled as he carefully brought the bag out of the room.

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ✘

It has been a week since the Oh family move in next door. Chanyeol's best friend has been hanging around your house too.

How fun.

"So the guy, who has been getting stalked by my sisters and yours, is your new neighbor? Wow. Such a small world."

Dasom laughed as she watch your face turned sour.

"Why do even girls like him?" You asked as you took a sip of your iced coffee.

"Girls in this generation like bad boys. Almost 95% of the books I've read at the library are all about good girls falling for the bad boys. I'm getting tired of it, girl." Dasom sighed as she looked at your window.

"Why does he enjoy playing with them though?"

"Maybe because he loves the attention? Or maybe he's just a jerk that likes to sleep with them?"

"Why would he like to sleep with them?"

"Probably because he knows that he can just use them for a day then throw them like trash after."

"That's gross." You cringed as you stopped typing.

"Why are you suddenly interested with Oh Sehun, huh? Don't tell me?!" Dasom gasped as she turned to you.

"Shut up. It's not like that."

"Why then?!"

"I kind of used him as the inspiration of the male character in my new story. I needed information about how a real playboy works." You shrugged as you frowned at her.

"Watch your steps then. You might enter the danger zone."

"Danger zone? What's that?"

Dasom walked closer to you, as if someone might hear her speak.

"The danger zone is the hole you might fall in when you get closer to a playboy, Yeoreum-ah."

You laughed at her words, hitting her forehead as you calmed down. She was just staring at you with a blank face.

"T-That's funny." You bit your lip as you stifled the laugh that was trying to get out of your mouth.

"I'm serious!"

"So what happens if I fell into that 'danger zone'?" You giggled as you made quotation marks as you said the two words.

"There's a possibility you might never come out alive."

Your smile dropped as you heard your best friend sigh.

"W-Why? You're gonna die in there then?"

"It's because you'll probably offer your life to him. You'll turn into a boomerang. Like even though he throws you away for a million of times, you'll just end up going back to him. That's how dangerous the danger zone is!"

"What kind of logic is that? How'd you know about this?" You grabbed your glass of iced coffee, feeling your throat dried up.

"I already entered that once."

You choked on your coffee, coughing hard in the process. Dasom squealed in panic. You just raised your palm up as a sign you're okay.

"Why didn't I know about this? Tell me everything!"

"It happened when I went to a party last 2 years ago. I ended up drunk and accidentally..." Dasom grinned as you listened to her attentively. "...had—"

"OKAY. Stop right there. You did that?!" You cut her off, knowing how that night ended with her.

"Don't act so innocent, Park Yeoreum! You're freaking 25, don't tell me you hadn't done that with J— oh fuck. No?"

You shook your head as you closed your eyes in embarrassment.

"But you'd been in a relationship for two years!" Dasom said frustratedly as she shook your shoulders, slightly making you dizzy. "Oh sorry."

"A relationship means loving and caring for each other as you get to know one another more. It's not about having sexual interactions or skinship. It's about staying stronger as time pass by, not only physically, but also emotionally and spiritually. Can you stay longer in a relationship that's just all about sex? You're just a slut if you can."

"I believe in you, my friend." Dasom nodded as she agreed with what you're saying. "You can really change my mind with your words."

"Anyway, I need to finish 5 chapters for this week. It's December already." You groaned as you realized something. "Shit. I have a conference on Monday."

"Where?"

"Seoul Metro Center. The company I'm working at for a while invited me to go. It's an opportunity to see other authors and their works too, so why not. It totally slipped out of my mind!" You said as you stood up and opened your closet.

Jeans, oversized t-shirts, jeans, polos, jeans, and...

"Jeans." You mumbled as you glared at your clothes. "I don't even have any formal clothes."

"I told you, you can count on me! I have a lot!" Dasom exclaimed as she walked to you. "I'll bring the ones I think will suit you tomorrow! I'll take care of it! I can be your make-up artist and hairstylist too!"

"Don't you have work on Monday?"

"Well, what time is your conference?"

"Around 3 in the afternoon."

"My job ends at 2, I can handle that! I'll go straight here after my shift."

You smiled as you turned to your best friend.

"You're really helping me a lot."

"I'm you best friend for goodness' sake! Rely on me more!"

The best best friend.

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ✘

"Is your Yeoreum noona gonna go somewhere today?" Sehun asked as Chanyeol made the outline of their project.

"What the fuck, dude. Didn't I tell you—"

"I'm just asking because I saw her go out in a formal attire earlier! Chill!" Sehun laughed as Chanyeol frowned at him.

"She's attending a Writers' Convention or something like that. You know how popular her books are, so it's normal she gets invited to events like that. It's her 5th time—"

"I thought you said she doesn't like going out?"

"Well, it's her work. That doesn't count." Chanyeol shrugged his best friend's question as Sehun just looked at him.

"You're hiding something from me, Chanyeol. I know you!"

Chanyeol's eyes widened as Sehun hit his cheek with a meter stick.

"YAH!"

On the other side—

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, author Park!"

A lot of professional authors, journalists and other well-known people greeted you as you entered the venue.

You were ushered towards your seat by a familiar face.

"Mr. Kim!" You greeted as you saw his face. Mr. Kim Junmyeon is the CEO of the writing company you're currently working at. He's young and already successful. You actually envy him a bit. He's 26 but he looks like he's just 12. Another thing you envy from him.

"You look lovely as usual, Ms. Park." He smiled, showing you his bright smile. "Let me lead you to your seat."

You roamed your eyes around the hall. Everything looks elegant and formal. The people are all wrapped in gorgeous and shining clothes.

You looked down at your dress.

It was simple but stunning in some way.

The dress was white, little diamonds on your waist. The collar part shows a bit of your collarbones, a sparkling necklace hanging resting on them. It's only up to your knees as your sleeves end at your forearms. You didn't wear heels, even though Dasom urged you to wear hers, since you knew how hard and uncomfortable to wear them. A simple white pair of flat shoes will suffice.

Your hair was highly tied, curls on the tips. Your make-up is not that dark, making a natural look for you.

"I want you to meet someone, Ms. Park. My friend wanted to meet you so bad when I mentioned you to him before. He's a writer too, he just lives a bit far from here." Mr. Kim looked around as he searched for his friend.

"May I know where your friend lives?"

"He left a few months ago to go to Canada. But he just returned to Incheon this week, so I invited him to come here too. I told him you're coming, I think he's really your fan. He said he'll come the second he heard you're coming."

You stopped roaming your eyes when Mr. Kim spoke.

"W-Who's your friend, Mr. Kim?"

"He's—" Mr. Kim's eyes widened in delight as he looked at the person behind you. "He's here."

Please tell me it's not him.

You chanted in your mind as you nervously smiled, preparing yourself to greet the newcomer.

"Dude, this is Yeoreum-ssi. I know you're one of her fans. This is a dream come true, huh?" Mr. Kim laughed as he stood up to hug his friend.

"Yeoreum."

As you heard his voice, you closed your eyes. You calmed yourself for a second before standing up to formally greet him. You turned to him with a smile as if everything's fine.

"Jaebum."

It's fucking nice to meet you again.

"Oh! You two know each other already?"

Mr. Kim innocently looked happy as he looked between you and Jaebum.

"Yeah. We were—"

"We were colleagues before." You cut Jaebum off as you gestured the chair in front of you. "Let's sit, shall we?"

The two sat down as Mr. Kim continued talking like he's not sensing the awkward atmosphere on your table.

"You didn't tell me you knew her." Mr. Kim told his friend as he chewed on his beef. "I thought you were just a fan."

"You didn't ask." Jaebum was talking to him but his eyes didn't leave you.

"The event's about to begin. Please settle down as the preparations are being done at the moment."

You sat up straight as you sipped on your glass of water.

"You're not gonna drink wine?" Jaebum suddenly asked, making you turn to him in surprise.

"You know I don't drink wine."

"Why though?"

"It's none of your business, Jaebum."

Jaebum chuckled as he heard you call him his name.

"You use to call me Jae or JB—"

"Please keep your thoughts to yourself. I don't want to hear it."

"Why, Yeoreum-ah?"

You glanced at Mr. Kim, who seems interested with the beef in front of him, before turning to Jaebum.

"What are you talking—"

"You know what I'm talking about."

"If this is about the us in the past—"

"Past? It's just 3 fucking months ago!"

Mr. Kim suddenly turned to the both of you.

"Are you two okay? You're like fighting or something."

"No, no. We're just catching up, Mr. Kim." You smiled at him as you waved him off. He hesitantly nodded as he glanced at his friend.

"Can we not talk about this here?" You mumbled as you focused on the stage in front. You heard him sigh.

"Of course. You're the one who always gets the final say."

Jaebum scoffed as he looked away from your side profile. You slowly brought your fist on your chest, feeling the erratic beating of your heart.

I'm sorry.

You still love him.

A lot.

—

❥ Ch.4

[neganandblake]

I think i liked you better when you didn't have  knife in your hand, Peaches... Chapter 178 - Back for good

When Blake finds herself sold out to the Saviours by her abusive fiancé, she realises that she’s certainly not on her own anymore and finds an unlikely friend in Negan. And Negan does NOT like men who beat their girlfriends, one tiny bit…

MASTERLIST

Chapter 178 - Back for good

[Negan confronts Blake about her return....]

Negan continued to frown hard as he gazed at Blake, standing there in front of him, behind the two Alexandrians.

He didn't fucking get it. He had only seen her a couple of hours ago at that damn house. And yet now she was here? With them?

What the hell was all this? Some kind of plan, conconted between the three of them? Maybe between Rick too?

But this was Blake he was talking about. HIS Blake.

Surely she would never do anything like this? Betray him…

And as if reading his mind, the tall, blonde woman stepped forward.

She was gazing back at him now, her head gently tilted to the side, eyes imploring.

"Negan-"

But Negan couldn't help but feel defensive in this moment, standing here in front of his men, being made a fool out of. His frown almost instantly deepening, fixing his face into an uncaring scowl once more.

"So….what...?" he said in a cold voice, lifting his bat and pointing between Blake and the two Alexandrians. "They jus' turned up to offer you a damn ride home, Sweetheart?"

But Negan immediately saw Blake scowl in reply to this, opening her mouth to speak, raising both her hands and taking another step forwards, until she was level with Carl and the dark-haired woman.

But before she could say anything, the teenage boy she was standing beside, cut across her.

"Negan, please...we need to talk-" he said in serious voice.

Shit, this kid really did have balls didn't he? Standing there with his Sheriff's hat hanging down low over his bandaged eye, hand hovering over the gun at his belt.

But is words only caused Negan's blood to boil further.

He didn't want to hear from these fucking people.

These people who, despite having no evidence to put any of them there, were blatantly responsible for putting a bullet into Blake. Putting the damn people he loved in danger.

"We don' need to fuckin' do anything, Kid!" snapped Negan suddenly in a booming voice that carried across the lot, cutting over Carl as he spoke. "Cause', hell, I am fuckin' done with you assholes and your goddamn high an' mighty fuckin' attitudes, walking the hell around like you own all this shit. Cause' I thought I'd made it perefctly fuckin' clear, to you, your dad, an' your damn people, when I killed carrot-top, or eyeball, back in that line up. I'm the one in charge here... I make the rules. And' you strollin' on in here, actin' like you've strapped on a damn pair, ain't gonna change my mind. "

Negan sucked on his teeth,before baring them like a dog.

He looked at once to Dwight.

"Lock 'em the fuck up until I decide what to do with them," he said with a wave of his hand, tensing his jaw hard.

But Blake suddenly spoke before Dwight could even make a move.

"No. Stop!" she shouted, her hair flying wildy behind her as she marched up to Negan now, closing the gap between them. "Negan, please!"

Dwight hovered ,a little confused now as to what to do, as did everyone around, who stilled in what they were doing, all eyes on their leader and the blonde woman.

But Negan just stared back at her incredulously.

What the fuck was she playing at?

"What, Darlin', huh? You gonna start defendin' them again? That it?" he snapped, blinking at her hard.

Negan half expected her to shout back at him at this.

Maybe he wanted an argument now. Pissed off at her for bringing these people here.

But to his surprise Blake remained quiet, instead, taking a small step into him and reaching up, her fingers grazing across his stubbly jawline, pulling his hard gaze instantly to hers.

"Baby... I'm not here to defend them," she said with an earnest shake of her head. "When they showed up at my door...I turned them away, I didn't want to hear it. Not again."

And with that, Blake glanced back at the two figures stood behind her, watching on nervously, before she turned back to Negan.

"But I was wrong," she said licking at her lips. "And all of us...we've been turning our backs on each other for too long now. And you know as well as I do that that's all gonna end in tragedy some day."

Blake's green eyes searched his, and Negan all of a sudden felt his anger ebb away.

Blake was home.

With him.

Negan frowned slightly at her, but this was no longer a look of fury, but now a look of sheer disbelief instead.

"Please, Negan...hear them out…" she said in a soft, pleading voice, her thumb grazing over his cheekbone. "I did…"

And perhaps if this was three weeks ago, Negan would have shoved her aside, ignored her pleas…

...but so much had happened, and Negan knew that for Blake to come back here…..now.….well this had to be important.

"Let's go inside and talk…" she continued gently, her words like birdsong to him now in the quietness of the lot.

And the dark-haired man merely chewed on the corner of his lip for a long moment, his honied eyes darting over Blake's gorgeous face, taking in every inch of her, before he let out a stark huff, covering his face with his hand for a moment .

"Alright, but jus' you an' me, Peaches...they stay out here…" Negan said starkly, his lips curling slightly, as his eyes flickered over her shoulder and landed on Carl and the dark-haired gal.

He didnt fucking want to listen to a damn word they had to say, but knew that for Blake's sake, he had to hear her out at least.

And so, with a small nod of her own, and one last poignant glance back to the two nervous looking Alexandrians, Blake linked her fingers with Negan's, and walked with him into the cool and oppressive Sanctuary.

Finally returning home at long last.

-------------------------------

It was an odd feeling to be back here, after so much time away.

Blake had, of course, grown to love the Sanctuary over time. And it wasn't until she had stepped back inside the expansive old factory building now, did she realise just how much she had missed it.

She had missed the feeling of being safe inside these four walls and not jumping every time there was a knock on the door or a noise in the distance.

She had missed being here with those she considered her family. Not just Negan and Mia but everyone here.

For it was here that she had grown into a different person, without the shackles of David around her neck, weighing heavy on her. Here she had found freedom and love, in a world where she had never thought it possible.

And it was now, that despite her fears and anxiousness about returning to this place, Blake realised that at the end of the day, that the Sanctuary was her home.

This was where she truly belonged.

Although the circumstances of her return were not now as she had hoped they would have been.

They were half way down down the gloomy hallway, walking in silence, side-by-side.

Blake knew that Negan was furious. And she understood that. Of course she did.

Blake wasn't stupid, and knew that bringing Carl and Tara here had been a bad plan, but at the end of the day it was still a hell of a lot better than if the two Alexandrians' had walked in here alone, without her, demanding an audience with Negan.

At least with Blake here, she knew he would listen to her reasoning.

He loved her. He had to.

But the blonde woman was still aware of how hot-headed he was. And although she didn't often get to see that side of him, she knew of course that it was still there, bubbling away on the inside.

He was fearsome and proud and didn't tolerate fools gladly. And Blake had understood that from the monnet she had met him.

But with her and Mia, the caramel-blonde woman had seen a different side to him…. gentle, protective, caring.

And these, often hidden, elements of this strong leader, had the potential to change all of their futures for the better.

If he could just see that there was another way. Not just for him this time. Not just for the Saviours.

But for everyone…

Blake chanced a glance up at him now, as he opened the door to a room on their right, and, checking it was empty, gestured for her to follow him inside.

Blake did, slowly closing the painted door behind her with a small snap, leaning her back against it a little forlornly, as she watched the man she loved pace across the empty room, running a hand over his mouth frustratedly.

She could see he was mad at her, but knew that he was obviously conflicted,not wanting to cause et another argument between the pair of them.

Eventually, through, half way across the room, standing by a lone table in the centre of the expansive space, he turned to her.

"You wanna explain to me what this shit is all about, Peaches," he finally said in a tired-sounding voice. "I asked you….hell, I fuckin' begged you to come back here with me earlier, an' you refuse. And yet those goddamn pricks show up, and you're back here soon as they snap their damn fingers?!"

But Blake closed her eyes for a moment, face turned towards the floor.

"It's not like that…" she murmured in a quiet voice. "You know I wanted to come home..."

But Negan turned to her, staring over at her imploringly.

"Did you, Blake? Did you?" he growled, a frown flitting between his dark eyebrows, as his name slipped from his tongue like a knife slashing through linen. "Cause from where I'm standin' those assholes snap their fingers and you come runnin'."

But Blake wasn't having any of this shit. Not from him.

Her eyes flashed darkly as she crossed the room towards him now, scowling hard.

"No, no way. After all that's happened don't you dare think that I would choose them over you, Negan," she said coming to stand in front of him and jabbing a finger into his chest hard. "I love you you stupid asshole."

And with a hard frown, Blake stood up on her tiptoes, placed her hand to the back of Negan's head…

….and pulled his lips to hers.

She felt him stay frozen for a short moment, before she heard Lucille being tossed down on the scrubbed wooden table beside them, and feeling both his hands swiftly snake around her waist.

She felt him at once groan into her mouth, flicking his hot tongue against hers hungrily.

But knowing he was enjoying himself, maybe a little too much, Blake pulled away with a knowing smirk, peeing up at him coyly.

"You gonna listen to me now?" she remarked, raising an eyebrow sternly.

And it was obvious that Negan couldn't help but grin, his lips curving up and showing off his set of straight white teeth.

"Might do," he hummed, attempting to snatch another kiss from her lips.

But Blake held him at arm's' length.

"Negan," she said softly, her voice now a little more serious. "Listen, first things first. We need to talk about what just happened out there, about Tara and Carl…"

But before Blake could continue she saw Negan's eyes instantly darken and his brow furrow deeply.

But she ran her hand down from the back of his neck, pressing her palm flat to his chest instead, giving him the smallest shove of frustration.

"Look this isn't about sides, because you know I'll always be on yours, and you know I wouldn't have brought them here without good reason," she said tilting her head to the side, causing her long blonde hair to trickle down her shoulder.

"Peaches, you really fuckin' expect me to believe that the kid came here all by himself an' that isnt some fukcing plan concocted by ol' Rick the Prick? Sendin' his son here to talk to me, forcin' me to let me guard down, so that he can swoop the fuck in to take back what's his?" asked the dark-haired Saviour with a huff of irritation.

But Blake just pursed her lips, shooting him a look.

"Carl and Tara came here to help, Negan," she said staring up into Negan's hazel eyes. "Rick doesn't know they're here-"

But Negan gave a scoff at her words, which only earned him another scowl in return from Blake.

"He doesn't!" she said firmly. "Look, Carl told me that his dad and the others are out, every day gathering guns. They're gonna try and fight back-"

But the dark-haired Saviour at once gave a wave of his hand.

"S'fine, I'll jus' take a quick trip to Pleasant as-shitsville over there and get him to hand over what he's got. Call it a damn amnesty-" he began.

But Blake shook her head.

"And what, just wait for Rick to try again?" the blonde woman said in voice of sheer desperation. "Because you know no matter what you do to him, he's never gonna stop. We'll always be fighting. And eventually someone you care about is gonna get hurt."

Negan lowered his chin at her words, gazing back at her, his chest rising and falling hard.

"I ain't gonna let you get hurt again. The pipsqueak neither-" he began, but Blake cut across him.

"But what if it's not us who gets hurt...o-or killed. What if it's you? You really think after you're gone, after your dead, Rick or anyone else is just going to take us all in after what we've helped you do? No. He's gonna make us suffer. Just like you were about to do to Carl and Tara outside, just now."

Blake felt her voice wavering and tears well in the bottom rim of her eyes.

For she new that what she was saying was true. All of them would suffer if they didnt stop this soon.

She took a breath before continuing, as Negan looked on. Lips pressed together, his face unreadable.

"Look, I got shot and I survived, but after that happened you went there with an army, all set to kill Rick and everyone else that got in your way. All for revenge. You know how that felt. How much it hurt. And Rick's only doing the same. You killed his people, Negan. And this is going to keep going back and forth, forever, until it's' over for one of us. And just because right now, we're the strong ones, that doesn't mean that in a few months time, Rick isn't stronger," Blake said her fingers curling around the fabric of Negan's white t-shirt between his unzipped black jacket. "And more people are going to end up dying. And I don't want that. Carl doesnt want that. And neither do you, baby."

Negan frowned hard, visible digging at his back molars with his tongue for a long few moments, contemplating Blake's words.

"So what, you're really tellin' me that kid and that gal are here for what? A damn peace offerin'?" he asked in a low voice.

But she shook her head once more.

"No," Blake whispered, her green eyes searching his. "He just wants to talk. That's all both of them want. That's why they're here. To try and show you that there might be better way. A future for all of us. Because one day you, and me, and Rick, we aren't gonna be here anymore. But hopefully Carl, a-and Mia, and Judith...they are. And we've got to at least try...for them..."

Negan stared at her for a long second, and for a moment Blake was sure he was gonna try and argue with her again. But instead she felt him lift his hand up and cup her cheek gently, his thumb grazing over her jawline.

"Peaches…" he began, before letting out a hard sigh. "... if I fuckin' do this...if I hear the lil' One-Eyed Shit out….you gonna stick around here again….for good this time?"

And for a second, Blake felt her heart almost stop at the words.

Was she ready to come back for good? Ready to be here?

But Blake's eyes left Negan's for a moment, staring instead around the empty room.

The Sanctuary could be a cold and lonely place and times. But at others, it was a place filled with life and warmth and joy.

And in her haze of depression and loss, Blake hadn't been able to see that.

But yet here and now, standing with Negan, this dangerous, and often frightening man, willing now to give Carl and Tara a chance, Blake knew that she was home.

For good this time.

And so, with a small smile and a nod, Blake looked back to Negan.

"I'm not going anywhere," she said pressing herself close to him, as Negan's face filled with an expression of utter relief.

And leaning forwards, Blake closed hers eyed contently as she felt him press a kiss to her temples before fumbling at his side and hauling his radio from his belt.

She took a deep breath, opened her eyes once more, peering up at him, steadying herself.

For she feared now that the most nail-biting moments of their conversation were yet to come, with Tara and Carl joining them this time.

And as though on cue, with his eyes still locked on hers., Negan brought the radio up to his mouth, letting out another lengthy sigh as he pressed his thumb down on the hold button.

"Dwight….." Negan growled, as Blake gave one final veiled gulp. "...Bring them inside…"

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged/untagged.

@collette04 | @attorneyl  | @mssharingisfun | @sakuraxx0  | @daydreamsandchai | @onemorebeautifulnightmare | @arwa-alii  | @maggiesourie | @blumenkind72 | @toloaughistolove  | @negans-womam| @elinyaes | @starbabysparkle| @mwesterfeld1985 | @letseatandsleep | @xxqueenofisolationxx| @lovesjdm | @padmeisgay | @karlbourbonismyhero | @lfsbitencourt | @toxic-ink | @laaadygisbooornex3 | @cutiedaij| @warriorqueen1991 |                     @ask-kakashihatake |  @beast-by-name  | @ourtenderescapes   | @itstheamandashow| @side-xix-men  | @dessie  | @soythedemonqueen | @lovelynerdytraveler |@joelssmugglingservice   | @sophiestru24 | @intensemindorgasms | @jenn0755 | @nerdygirlwithacrush | @ali-in-fandomland  | @spn-mudkip | @neganismyobsession  | @ryantherandomhero| @embee222 | @neganslilbitch | @theofficialduke | @xagateophobiax   | @nu1freakshow | @simplysiriuslyjoking | @negan5589 |          @blondielovesr5-blog | @ididntchoosethislife  | @andreainfla618 | @yezzyzzz  | @jessiellong1987 | @likearaindropfilledwithgoldust | @kristenallison04 | @vanilla-negan | @simplysiriuslyjoking | @shannmiw  | @qhbr2013 | @uncharte-dlove | @nerdaspe | @thedeadwalks | @pizzaisrelationshipgoals| @kalista225 | @saved-by-fiction | @nerdywriter| @hayleighloatx| @miss-cap21 | @julietdanielle08 | @teamnegansaviors  |  @haileyk2601 | @peoplealwaysleave89 | @nyakozhovur  | @theunwantedwriter| @theunwantedwriter| @kateyasher | @myrabbitholetoneverland| @topthis808  | @depressed-teenagekids | @curlyhairedblueeyedangel | @band--psycho  | @artisticlales | @messybitch802 | @itstotalyblue | @luciferandaleks | @queenofthesole | @athena1504 | @sighsophiia | @make-things-beautiful2 | @lynn1712 | @thamberlina | @batmanlover1593 | @jdmsgal | @queenslandlover-93 | @neganrpblog | @michellevalvona | @roguesandsaviors | @godaddy-winchester | @fuckyeafishes | @hotdigggittydogg | @thewingeddragon | @negan-the-cat | @little-big-mac | @longlostx11 | @izabellexmorningstar | @catlovescats | @lunatheumbreon | @mytreasures4eternity47 | @itookherteethies | @laura-clapton| @justnatalies | @queen0fants | @belsoleleann| @yellatthetopofyourlungs | @lellatron  | @bvckysbrns | @shesxperfect | @omqstyleseditss| @tigger4367 | @ohmy-sammy | @ainhoitaoz| @youshouldloveyourselfbruh | @winteerrose | @babeinthesun| @topthis808 | @colormewhole-blog-blog | @so-i-died | @a-little-catty | @sannamahlkvist | @the-nuup | @i-fucking-rock| @deanervs | @searchf0rtheskyline | @emmyhaynes | @thisistjross | @future-ll-evans | @starlessskies94 | @lellatron | @carolines24 | @youll-all-get-yours | @jackybehappy | @shadesofarrogance | @candiloverr | @emybug101 | @imstonecoldnegan | @sapphirerose0122 | @katerinas | @blondekel77 | @thetruebornwildchild | @ambx2 | @bibailey | @nekocookie11 | @mellowspypersonadeputy | @champagnesugamama | @lostdarksoul6 | @babygirlmeepi | @may-machin | @julyintherain12 | @drina365 | @bob-giovanni | @journeyrose | @faith-lynn9 | @mellowspypersonadeputy | @queenredfury | @bohemianwhatsername | @heyworld07 | @sarcasticrose18