#pike willing to try despite who laudna is

[everythingisconfetti]

Like yes, it's hilarious that Pike, a level 20 cleric of Sarenrae, describes herself as a baker. but also- the fact that she can do that. that life has become such that if all she wants to do is make cookies and decorate her house with knick knacks and paintings of her friends- she can. Because god, have they earned it. It's in Pike's baking. In Percy's clocktower. In Vex, teaching her children to hunt for the sport of it, not because they need it to survive. It's in Whitestone, flourishing, alive.

So really- can Percy be blamed, for demanding Delilah isn't given the chance to return, with his young daughter right there? And Vex, Pike- their willingness to help, to even give a maybe, in the face of all that maybe could mean? To hold the weight of the past and of everything they have built since and still say yes, we'll try?

There's guilt there, yes, and a feeling of responsibility, but it's also looking at these people who just love their friend so much. And it's knowing what it's like to lose someone you love like that, the lengths you'll go- the lengths they have gone- to fix that. So they look at Imogen, at all the Hells, and they look at Laudna, in all she represents, in all she might be, and they say okay. We'll try. What an incredibly selfless choice.

[isagrimorie]

[initial reactions] Critical Role: Bells Hells episode 49

That was such a good episode, I know that the characters were stressed being on board the sky ship, eating up time as the Apogee Solstice creeps ever forward but it was such a great moment for the characters to unwind a bit and talk. I always love their planning stuff despite how many people gripe about it on the chat and reddit, I love their thought process and the way they try to mitigate the damage they do.

I already love Laudna but IMO she was in fine form this episode, finally cracking Ashton open and getting that long awaited talk out of the way. I can see why the dynamic of Keyleth and Percy work so well in C1 and I wish its something they can show more in the animated series. *crossing fingers for season 3 of TLOVM!

It does feel like its a dynamic Taliesin and Marisha want to recreate in a different flavor with Ashton and Laudna, and they're doing so successfully. I love how Ashton and Laudna talk, and call each other's bullshit out but this episode especially, Laudna is showing off the wisdom she learned in 30 hard earned years she's lived.

Orym's also successfully reaching out to people with Dorian and I love how we're getting hints of things in EXU Prime that in their end, things are also very dicey. Opal getting dark???

I am so into that and Fearne's immediate concern is apparent. But also, Marisha knowing the details of the EXU Prime plot is so juicy!

The gang accomplished so much recruiting Ira, finally telling some more people in authority or approximate authority about how dire the situations are. Telling Pike, even though she can't do things, maybe? Possibly? Apparently, things on Tal'dorei are also very dicey, so Whitestone might have its own problems with the Ziggurat.

I'm going to heap more praise towards Laudna because of the interrogative sort of femme fatale honey pot play she did with Ira, getting Ira to talk more about it, tagged teamed with Fearne at the end.

Speaking of, Fearne is very much still ambivalent towards her parents, sure she's nice to them but as she told Nana Morri, her parents feel more like strangers than people related to her.

Also, Thank Goodness, the team's finally equipped but I need Dani to remind the cast that they still have residuum and the bracers of defense!

I feel like there's gonna be some Mad Max shenanigans that's going to happen on the Apogee Solstice, and its going to be heart pounding and epic and so great.

FCG also learned some things about himself, about how he is not alone and Devaxian also stressed how from this point on he is gifted with a chance to own his own future. A future of his own making. (A theme that will be repeated a lot!).

And then there's that moment when Imogen meets with Liliana again and, and, and I am VINDICATED!!! LILIANA IS A TRUE BELIEVER. She might even be Ludinus's real right hand and not Otohan which would be DELICIOUS.

I love that Liliana tried to get Imogen on her side and Imogen genuinely considered it because the vision she painted was tempting, for someone like Imogen who was tormented by her powers that's a siren call.

But of course, Fearne and Orym was around in the dream and they played it as silent observers instead of actively interacting with the dream space like how the others did it. It does feel like Fearne and Orym are still at heart, a unit. In a similar but different way to Laudna and Imogen. I love the talk they had about Imogen, about the possibility of Imogen turning because of her mother. Orym and Fearne will do what's necessary to stop things from happening and it's really fascinating how that will go.

Laura's face was interesting the whole time too.

And then, and then just when the group thinks its hopeless they get a possible help and distraction of the big army with Keyleth coming in, sounding exhausted and heart sick but still willing to help to put Ashari volunteers to help. I hope the group remembers to warn Keyleth about the antimagic that's going to happen.

I feel like Keyleth and the Air Ashari can act as distraction while the Bells Hells, as a strike team can go and take down the Malleus Key. Everyone in the cast looked happy at this development, except for Marisha who looked worried and had her Thinking Face on.

Near the end, Imogen talks to Orym and asked how he can go on after everyone he lost and they have a heartfelt talk. Orym tells Imogen that he believes in her but Imogen is not convinced but doesn't try to read his mind to know if this is true. Instead, at long last, after many episodes.

Imogen goes back to the room she shares with Laudna and finally talks to her. Whatever impetus it was: her fear, uncertainty, or the realization that she shares some similarities with her father and that's the reluctance to talk.

Laudna asks if Imogen is okay, and automatically, Imogen answers she is. Laudna gently tells Imogen she didn't need to lie to Laudna about 'being fine'. And so Imogen opens the conversation with admitting that she's been afraid of really talking to Laudna after she was resurrected, that she had something to tell Laudna.

Laudna asks Imogen what it is she wanted to say but Imogen hesitates and then says something about her fear and god I love how Laudna approached her talk with Imogen. I love that Laudna went about it with understanding because, of course, who more than Laudna hasn't thought what would have happened if life had been different.

Laudna had thirty years to think similar thoughts, to wish a different life than the one she had. She candidly told Ashton she made Patê so she won't lose her mind wandering alone.

But through everything Laudna lived through she is very cognizant too the reason she met Imogen and the other Bells Hells was because of who she is and became. And I think Marisha has her answer to Aabria's question from the 4 Sided Dive a long time ago -- there is a part of her that is a little grateful for Delilah or whatever patron that made her a Hollow One, that she has this powers now and ability to be spooky. Things she enjoys.

It's a little messed up and complicated.

I also love that while Laudna didn't hear Imogen's promise about how Laudna will always have a choice, Laudna unknowingly echoed back Imogen's words. Imogen has a choice. She will always have a choice and having the ability to choose is a power all its own. Its not something gods can take away.

Honestly, I love how Laudna is talking to Imogen from a place of understanding and I think more than anything, this helped Imogen solidify her grasp of why they're fighting. It's not just because its wrong and kill other people. All morally right reasons why they need to stop Ludinus and his group.

It's because every individual deserves a right to choose. And that love also means loving every part of a person, especially the weird parts of them.

Imogen might have lost her nerve to tell Laudna she loved her, loved her, romantic stylez and Laudna might slowly be waking into the part of herself that can access it. But its plain as day they love each other and I'm okay to wait on how long and slow this will cook, but also saying things like:

"I feel so comfortable and bonded with you. We transcend words in our relationship.

"You'll always have me."

"I'll always be there to support you whatever choice you make.

"You're my tether."

"That tether goes beyond this realm and this life."

C'MON. Those words are my ship Kryptonite! If I hadn't already shipped them, this would have definitely tip the scales! And I feel very well fed tonight!

God I love them. I love the Bells Hells.

[isagrimorie]

It is interesting how FCG went 0 to 60 into religion, possibly because they have nothing to hold on to. FCG's been searching for answers about who they were and despite the really good: You can be who you want to be.

In practice, it's not really as much solace about it, and as an Aeormaton FCG is used to taking orders and having a framework. Since FCG is built on the framework of Kenneth from 30 Rock, it's very much like the time Kenneth questioned his destiny if he wasn't working for 30 Rock anymore.

The thing is though, there's only so much the other Bells Hells can do to help since they're also struggling, and save for Orym, the majority of the Hells aren't really into divinity.

Laudna seems to find some consolation in the words the professor said to FCG. Delilah controlling or by something else, and fearing she'll hurt people is a fear that constantly haunted Laudna.

Self-determination is something Laudna wants because her life was in the hands of other people for so long.

And no god was around to save her or her parents back then.

The only one who seemingly helped her was Delilah, who was the very person that had her beaten and killed and then gaslighted Laudna for nearly 30 years.

Predathos and Ruidus are fucking with Imogen's life enough that before Laudna entered her life, Imogen considered ending her own. And before that, it seemed Imogen's mother had the same burdens. And seemingly drew Lililliana into a partnership with a man like Ludinus.

Fearne had no need nor use of gods her whole life and the one interaction she had with one, she blames for making her choose between Laudna and Orym.

(Although, a point for the gods' favor is how the Everlight brought Laudna back. But, maybe from some of the Bells Hells' point of view it was Pike who did the work).

Chetney's lived long enough to be blasé about gods.

Orym might be the only one with clear worship and respect for divinity since he's brushed up amongst people who have interacted with gods. Although, Keyleth isn't really up to respecting gods willy-nilly. She has several bones to pick.

Ashton is also someone who could take or leave gods. In their life, as far as they nows and remembers, gods are around but haven't really done much for them.

So amongst this group, I don't think FCG can gain some spiritual guidance. Maybe if he spoke to a cleric, FCG might get more clarity and direction he seems to crave.

As Sam Riegel said in a 4SD in a horror movie, FCG would be the overconfident one who goes out and says: "Come out guys, there's nothing her--" and dies immediately.

But also, I actually find it admirable that even when the majority of the Bells Hells are so-so about gods they're still willing to lay down their lives to stop Ludinus and his group*. Bells Hells' whole thing might be: "We don't like what he's doing, gambling Exandrian lives for more power or whatever nebulous goal Ludinus and his group have. Dubious motives, still extinction-level event."

Bells Hells --this group of outcasts and misfits-- might be small and they're punching way beyond their weight class but they'll try their damnedest to stop whatever extinction-level event that's about to kick off.

(Also, Ludinus's group consists of: Ruby Vanguard possibly composed of Exaltants, the Unseelie Court -- relentless with memories longer than time and quite possibly some members and resources of the Cereberus Assembly).