#probably cuz of the audhd. everything is because of the autism or the adhd or both

[puppys-rhythm-heaven]

i think it's nice how tengoku's the first game but also still manages to be v good. the second best rhythm heaven. i mean the second best rhythm heaven is fan club 2 but i mean you know what i mean-

[yer-a-mess-kid]

I dated this toxic guy for awhile, who would use his adhd as an excuse for why he was abusing me, and it lead me to think, for a bit, that people with adhd were abusive, because, and this is Crazy.

I tried to tell him once or twice that I was dx'd with adhd as a kid,a nd he told me I couldn't have it because I was:

A) Too aware of my surroundings/dirt/clutter

B) Too capable of cleaning and taking care of myself

C) willing to manage the household, meaning my appointments, his, and everything else in between.

it wasn't until later, when i brought up my childhood dx with my therapist and my psychologist that they told me that i was actually overfunctioning to compensate for his lack of/inability to function or manage himself, and that the reason why i suddenly seemed to lose a bunch of skills i used to have was because i was probably experiencing audhd (I have both) burn out :,)

i've since figured out, after breaking up with him, that his abuse was actually just because he's an abusive piece of shit who likes to gaslight people and make everything about himself, not cuz he has adhd. i have autism and adhd both, and my partner now has audhd and is also Not like that. i feel stupid for ever being lead to believe his adhd was causing him to act like that. i mean, this dude used his hyperfixations to abuse me, it was even down to shit like that. i swear to you that every fandom he ever got into was the most important thing to ever happen to him, and that i was like. victimizing him if i didn't match his obsession with everything he was interested in. like??? my current partner has been SUPER into Zelda for the past couple of weeks (we're both interested in it) but he never acts like i'm killing him to DEATH if i don't match his freak every day sldkjf

like, i do think he has adhd and it really causes him to struggle, but i don't believe for a second that i need to Partake in his dysregulation in order to care for him.

oh right, the other thing? i once brought up the mental load to him and he said i was being ablelist lmaoo