#r: light through stained glass

[cityandking]

🐬 👉 ❄️ ☔️ for dairef and narayani/solas :>

thanks dear // otp hc questions

🐬 - Who made the first move? 

DAIREF — dai, in offering zaref his trust again after zaref revealed he'd been keeping secrets and also in returning zaref's memories colored by his feelings and also in being the one to close the gap when they finally kissed NARAYANI/SOLAS — rani did! it was a bit of an idle flirtation at first, but he kept saying these lovely half-helpless things and what was she supposed to do? not kiss him? (rip)

👉 - Who is better at giving directions? 

DAIREF — word of DM says "obviously daichi" (word of DM is correct) NARAYANI/SOLAS — solas. rani can but won't. solas has more patience than she does and is a better teacher.

❄️ - Who worries about the other the most? 

DAIREF — I think dai worries about zaref more but dai also tends to worry about everyone. also now that dai has blown himself up and entered Depression it maybe more balanced, but generally speaking, in aggregate, it's daichi. NARAYANI/SOLAS — solas. not only is rani generally in more danger than he is, he also has a better understanding of what that danger entails, on account of It's Slightly His Fault.

☔️ - How do they make up after a fight? 

DAIREF — mostly by talking it out. dai is a big proponent of having conversations (I mean maybe not right now but. generally speaking.) and that's especially true when there's some kind of conflict. first clear the air, then spend some time together. NARAYANI/SOLAS — they're big on apology gifts. they don't have to be big gifts or anything, but whoever was in the wrong will make some kind of obvious, tangible amend. sometimes there'll be an actual "sorry" included, sometimes it's just an Item or a Gesture. (when solas disappears, he leaves her with his necklace. she knows what it means.)

[cityandking]

I have been granted too much power [x]

[cityandking]

daichi/zaref + trembling. 1.1k. for @forcekenobi // angst prompts

He wakes with the sour tang of ash under his tongue and the copper smell of blood thick in his nose, and for a wild minute he doesn’t know who or when he is. His heart—has he got one of those?—pounds and his breathing—does he need that?—comes sharp and erratic, and he reaches for the red-hot metal searing against his cheek with bloodied hands and finds nothing but cool, sweat-clammy skin and his own open, gasping mouth. No blood, no ash. No burning.

Daichi opens his eyes and slowly pushes himself to sitting. The blue-dark familiarity of a Selto bedroom greets him, cool and still save for Zaref huffing quietly on the far side of the bed and the bleed of the city pressed against the window. He glances down at his hands, but they're clean, bare, dark skin cut through with faint scars. In the dim of the night they look more silver than gold, and he runs a finger along the line of one, from his third knuckle up and around his forearm, snaking like a vein. His heart pounds in his chest, flitting like some small, caged creature. His hands won't stop shaking.

It must be late, or early, or that spot between where it is both at once. There is no clock in the room, but the night is deep around him, held like a breath. He should go back to sleep, catch what rest he can before dawn. But when he closes his eyes, he's met with a wash of vertigo and the lurching fear that he will open them somewhere and somewhen and someone else, a sense so strong he swings his legs out of bed and presses his feet to the cold floor.

So— No. He will not be returning to sleep just yet.

He rises unsteadily, untangling himself from the sheets. His shirt sticks unpleasantly to his back, sweat all the way through. The walls squeeze around him, room small and growing smaller, and he needs air, needs space. He needs the sky.

When he steps out into the hall, there's a faint glow of light coming from downstairs, though he can't imagine who's still awake at this hour—Kallux maybe, or Lyn, or Abraham doing whatever it is he does when left to his own devices. He turns away from it, picking his way as silently as he can up the stairs. He must manage passably, because no doors open and no one interrupts him as he makes his way to the roof.

The first breath of fresh air fills him, quieting some of the clamor in his head. The night is warm, but the breeze is cool when it catches the loose edges of his shirt, tugging at the ties and wicking away the lingering heat of his nightmare. He half expects to run into someone else, but the roof is empty save for the arching boughs of the tree.

He picks his way across the rooftop, past the tree to the furthest edge of the building, and eases down. Everything has settled into a lull so late—a few cars buzz past in the distance; a smattering of lights glow golden between the spilling green of lower Isan. The street below is empty. All around him, the city breathes, and Daichi breathes with it.

He can't say how long he's been out here—long enough for his heartbeat to settle, long enough for some of the golden windows to wink out—when the door creaks and footsteps approach behind him. The breeze rustles through the tree, and Daichi holds himself still as Zaref sits next to him.

"I'm sorry if I woke you," Daichi says. Zaref makes a low noise, barely more than a hum.

"You did not."

Daichi knows he's not the only one who sleeps poorly some nights. "Bad dreams?"

Zaref shrugs—a yes, then—and says, "You were gone."

Guilt, or maybe grief, wraps around his throat. It makes speaking difficult. "Zaref—"

"When I woke up," he clarifies, and the words die on Daichi's tongue. The silence sits heavy between them.

"I'm sorry," he manages eventually, thin and faltering. He presses his palms against his thighs to hide their shaking. "I'm here. I just— needed some air."

"Have you been out here long?" Zaref asks, and Daichi wonders what he found when he woke—has the bed cooled in his absence? Were the sheets a tangled mess, an echo of his nightmare?

"Not too long," he says. He has no idea if it's true or not. "You don't need to stay. You should go back to bed. Get some sleep."

“No,” says Zaref in that firm, measured way of his. "I am not leaving you alone."

"I'm alright."

It's a terrible lie. He has no idea who he's trying to convince—Daichi wouldn't believe himself, and it's clear Zaref doesn't either if the snort is anything to go by. He presses his fingers harder against his legs.

"You don't need to stay," he says again, quieter. Zaref shifts next to him.

"Do you want me to go?"

Yes, he should say, but it sticks in his throat. If there is any one thing he owes to Zaref, it is the truth.

"No," he says. It crawls up from inside him, small and wanting, and he feels small with it. Surely it has not always been this difficult to say what he wants, what he means. Surely it did not always feel like digging his fingers into his gut and pulling something ugly and messy out in offering. He takes a breath, bracing. "But you should rest—"

"Daichi." Zaref catches his hand, his trembling hand, and for a moment Daichi wants to say Don't, don't touch me, this will stain you too.

Zaref laces their fingers together, quiet. Daichi takes another breath, full up with things he doesn't know how to voice—how his sleep brings him back there; how even awake he fears forgetting; how the fear is a relief if only because he never feared there, and at least it reminds him that he is still himself.

But he doesn't know how to say that, so instead he says, "I didn't mean to worry you."

"I know," says Zaref—though that doesn't, Daichi knows, mean he won't worry. Quieter, barely a murmur, Zaref adds, "You can wake me, you know."

"I know," Daichi echoes—and knows Zaref knows that doesn't mean he will. On another night, at another time, it might almost be funny how little the knowing changes things. Here, now, Daichi only aches. "Give me a few more minutes?"

"Of course." Zaref shifts, and then comes the press of lips against his temple. Daichi closes his eyes and leans into Zaref's touch, waiting for the lingering dregs of his nightmare to be swept up by the breeze.

[cityandking]

not to magnusblog about my blorbos but intense little ace guy who is loved by his god and sees all(tm) and gives away pieces of himself to try to solve problems + kinda normal guy who is along for the ride but also hiding some secrets and a little bit touched by a divine power himself is. I mean. there are parallels there

[cityandking]

1, 14, 23, 42 for dairef, middy/eniko and um [checks notes] dai/ozy for a laugh

thanks my dear!! // send me a ship

1. How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals?

DAI/ZAREF — I feel in my heart that they're both disciplined about keeping regular bedtimes (quest permitting) and waking up early. dai is always up with the sun to go pray/meditate, and then after he and zaref will spar, and then it's time to wash up and make breakfast (daichi cooks). MIDDY/ENIKO — eniko will stay up late no matter how hard middy tries to coax him to bed, but the longer they're together the more that means staying in bed with a book/tablet/computer as she falls asleep (if he's having a particularly restless night he'll leave the room so he doesn't bother her and come to bed much later—though it's always a bit of a challenge navigating the millions of pillows that spawn in bed when middy is around). mornings are a little easier—it's a tossup who wakes up first, but they'll both the other one sleep in whenever possible. waking up slow and all that. DAI/OZY — this is so funny. given ozy's current *waves hand* everything, I'm imagining daichi turns in first (always on schedule) and ozy shows up whenever (some time after the moon is in the sky). in the morning, daichi is still up early which probably means ozy is too. maybe he has coffee ready for them when dai finishes with his morning prayers

14. Anything they both dread?

DAI/ZAREF — they're equally invested in not losing the other one to the Void or some other horrible death (zaref has been much better at avoiding this than daichi). I think they're also both a little trepidatious about the Void-ified Underdark right now. MIDDY/ENIKO — I don't think their dreads intersect a whole lot, actually. broadly speaking there's the "something bad happening to the person I care about" fear, but their specific dreads move kind of in opposite directions—middy spends a lot of energy thinking about other people and eniko spends a lot of energy thinking about himself (I think maybe depending on the AU they'd both dread whatever's going on with loreth—middy because it's loreth, and eniko because it'll hurt middy) DAI/OZY — they're on the same page quite often about the bad situations they're walking into and the relative unpleasantness of them, but they're also both the kind of person who will just grit their teeth and do it, so I'm not sure dread is the right word. I guess they're both confirmed Not Fans Of The Traveler

23. How do they hug? Kiss? Tease? Flirt? Comfort?

DAI/ZAREF — daichi is Bad at flirting and also not great at teasing, but he gives a great hug. he is also very good at kissing zaref, because he's a good student and a quick study and zaref's preferences are the only ones he has experience with. zaref is good at flirting (and teasing) and daichi, despite being an awkward little dude, very much enjoys it when zaref goes through the trouble of flirting with him. they exchange a lot of physical comfort—hugs, touches, etc—and they're also better about talking things out directly than they used to be. MIDDY/ENIKO — they're a surprisingly tactile couple given eniko's endless issues. good hugs, very good kisses, lots of flirting and teasing. for eniko that's all fun, easy stuff he doesn't have to think too hard about, and he enjoys doing it with middy. comfort is harder. he's bad at giving comfort and really bad at accepting it; he'd rather nurse his hurt like a bruise than let anyone try to comfort him. it's maybe one of the most difficult parts of their relationship DAI/OZY — sorry this is so funny. um. I don't think they hug. I think there could be some really weird (read: fun) power dynamics to explore with how they kiss. ozy is both the tease and the flirt in this relationship, though daichi gets a certain sort of entertainment out of stonewalling him. (this is actually also flirting, in a "I know you can do better than that" kind of way. like I said. weird power dynamics.) ozy is canonically Bad at comfort, and dai doesn't try to comfort ozy so much as he tries to talk through thorny issues and concepts. I think maybe there's a kind of comfort in that though? like he's willing to meet ozy where he is for those conversations

42. Do they let each other get away with things that would normally bother them?

DAI/ZAREF — dai definitely lets zaref get away with more shit than anyone else. I feel like zaref is general inclined to let people get away with stuff, dai included (ozy is an outlier etc) but idk I don't hold the zaref lore. daichi's much more patient and gentler and inclined to look the other way with zaref than pretty much anyone else, sometimes to an unhealthy degree, tho it's been better recently MIDDY/ENIKO — yes, but mostly in the sense that the things that would normally bother him don't bother him when it's middy. she can get away with so much, and she knows this. (middy tends to let people get away with plenty that they shouldn't, so eniko tries to hold himself to a higher standard for her sake, particularly when it comes to communicating and being available) DAI/OZY — absolutely not. if anything ozy gets away with less than other people would. daichi's calling him on everything.

[cityandking]

another kind of hello

oc kiss week '24 // dairef + canon (1.2k) dai and zaref got to enjoy a couple (private!) date nights in selto after daichi's time in the abyss. here's the tail end of their first post-rez date (and also their first real proper date ever)

He thinks on it all afternoon, as they leave the tattoo parlor and when they pass the skating rink and at dinner after. It isn’t that big a thought, not really, but it seems to grow larger the longer he mulls it over, and more layered, and a little delicate too. It's the sort of thought he has to turn over so he can see it from all angles before he speaks out.

So it isn’t until they’re standing on the street after dinner, night warm and bright and busy around them in the way Selto always is, that he says, “I want to do this right.”

Zaref, looking up timetables on the side of the bus shelter, glances at him.

“I know it’s a little late for that,” Daichi allows, more wry than guilty—which is a relief, to be honest; he doesn’t want to do this with guilt. “But I’d like to do this right anyway. Or as right as I can.”

“This,” Zaref echoes. His eyes trace the lines of the bus shelter, pointed, and Daichi swallows something that feels like a laugh.

“Dinner,” he clarifies. “Skating rinks. Museums or bars or... I would like to spend time with you without worrying about the world ending around us.”

Zaref raises an eyebrow. “I believe they call that dating.”

His tone is dry, but there’s something amused in the crook of his mouth as he says it.

"I— Yes." Daichi shrugs, too aware of his own skin and the shape of himself inside it. “I don’t know if I’ll be very good at it. I haven’t had much experience, and things so far have been… a little intense.”

“That’s one way to put it.”

“And—“ Daichi hesitates, takes a breath. This is the harder part, one of the layers he isn't entirely sure about. “And I know you’re angry.”

In truth, anger feels like too small a word for it, but it’s the one Zaref used. Even saying it now it makes him go a little still, a little sharp.

“I would like to do things right," he says, careful. Zaref waits, watching, giving Daichi time to parcel out what he wants to say. Daichi still isn't entirely sure how to tell him how grateful he is for that space. "Even if it’s difficult. I want time with you. I want to know you with and without the armor. I want— I want to have fun.”

Zaref gives him a look at that, something between challenge and doubt, but Daichi holds it. He means that. He has the sense it might take more work than he’s prepared for—fun is not something he's had much opportunity to cultivate—but he wants it. He’s never been one to shy away from hard work.

A heartbeat later, Zaref’s expression softens. The city moves around them, cars and pedestrians and the endless hum.

“We have some fun,” he says, mild.

“Well, yes. But we also…” He doesn’t want to bring up the Abyss right now. Or Selto, or Monrha, or Asdor, or Wiztopia. He grimaces. “We don’t often have time for it.”

“No,” Zaref allows. “I suppose we do not.”

“So I would just— I’d like to do this again. More. I had a good time. I’d like to— I want to take you out again.”

“I think you are supposed to wait to ask for a second date after the first one has ended.” Zaref is definitely smiling now. Daichi sighs.

“I thought someone might try to listen in if I asked at home.”

“I suppose sometimes they can be nosy.”

“Right,” Daichi says dryly. “Sometimes.”

Zaref laughs.

“I know they mean well," he hurries to add, a little sorry for the irritation. They don't deserve it, mostly. They mean the best of almost everyone he knows. “I only— I hope you’ll forgive me if sometimes I don’t want to share you. Or— Share us, I guess.”

“Mmh,” hums Zaref. “I think I can forgive you for that.”

“So then— Can we do this again?”

“Isn't it customary to kiss at the end of the date,” Zaref returns, “before asking for the next one?"

He's definitely teasing now, but it draws Daichi up short.

“You— Oh.” He isn’t sure why that’s a surprise, except that they haven’t actually kissed, not since— Zaref’s has hardly left his side, true, but this is…

This they haven’t tried again. Not yet.

“Are you sure?” he asks. This feels like the sort of thing that requires confirmation. Permission. The guilt is back, a little—it does tend to lurk, particularly where Zaref is concerned.

Zaref’s answer is a step forward, moving slow and purposefully into Daichi’s space. The closeness is not a surprise, but he hand on his jaw is a sweeter, stranger thing. For a moment, Daichi remembers a desert world from a lifetime ago. The sun has long since set, but the light of the bus shelter drips over them, and Daichi is all instinct when he rises onto his toes and closes the distance between them.

It’s a strange thing to kiss someone again after so many years of separation. It's strange to fall back into something he used to know so well and hasn't forgotten so much as un-remembered.

“Sorry,” he mumbles when they part, his heart thudding a mile a minute. He says it like a reflex, automatic and clumsy, and it surprises him. His fingers have curled into Zaref’s shirt, holding tight without his permission, and a small and distant part of him marvels at how badly he can miss someone who is standing right in front of him. All of the neat, clean lines of meaning he holds in his mind smear to abstraction; he forgets to look at the layers and the angles and the thoughts. “Sorry,” he repeats, though sorry isn't what he means at all, and then he leans in to kiss Zaref again.

Everything inside him buzzes. He feels it from the crown of his head to the soles of his feet, a shock and a settling both. It is, he imagines, a little like coming home. Something like desperation pushes up under his tongue, a deep and welling want, and Daichi makes himself pull away before it swamps him.

“Don’t apologize,” says Zaref, hand at his waist, voice rough. “Don’t— Not for this.”

“Okay,” Daichi nods. Promises. He takes a breath and makes himself unhook his fingers from Zaref’s shirt. He finds his hand instead, a better thing to hold, and Zaref slots their fingers together without a word.

For a long minute, they sit under the shelter. The bus comes, and then they sit there instead, side by side, clasped hands tucked between them. The night flashes past through the window, the city big and blooming and alive.

It isn’t until they get off the bus that Daichi asks again.

“Persistent,” Zaref says, squeezing his hand. Daichi hums.

“I've heard I can sometimes be stubborn.”

“Sometimes,” Zaref echoes, dry, and Daichi doesn’t bother to hide his smile. Zaref bumps against him, pointedly clumsy, and Daichi sways with him. “I guess you like me, hm.”

It catches for a moment—that flicker of guilt, of things left unsaid too long. Daichi feels it and lets it pass.

“Yes. I meant it. I want to do this right.”

“Mmh. Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I’d like that too.”

“Okay,” says Daichi, and even in the dark he can see the edge of Zaref’s smile. “Then we will.”

[cityandking]

3, 7, 12, 19, 27 for the first two ships that come to mind!

thanks tabby! I'll do the girls and dairef // development questions for couples

3. By contrast, what was the moment that first made their ~heart~ Soft for the other person? Not necessarily a conscious realization of “I love this person,” but a moment that had them like “Oh...I adore them...”

BRAN/SABINE — it was absolutely sabine getting into a fight. doesn't matter which au; bran saw sabine get into it with a guy at least half a foot taller than her and was like. oh. I want her to come home with me. huh. (I have no idea what swayed sabine but I'd imagine it involved bran being at least a little bit of a cocky sonuvabitch) DAI/ZAREF — some moment of watching zaref with izzy and seeing him like, 80% more chill than normal. the trust was there already, and the admiration, but there was that small and strange period of time in selto where everything was quiet and they could all settle in and daichi saw him without all his armor (metaphorically and also literally) and was like. oh. oh. (word of DM says for zaref it was shortly after they arrived in wiztopia, after they had their talk about zaref hiding the truth of the void from them but daichi being willing to trust him and trust that they'd have each other's backs)

7. Do they (or would they) pursue the other character’s affection, and if so, how? Do they tell the other character how they feel? Try to earn their admiration? Woo them with romantic gestures? Flirt with them, skillfully or otherwise?

BRAN/SABINE — yeah, absolutely. bran loves flirting and putting on a show and grand gestures, and she also likes being liked, which means a lot of wooing. it starts out kind of teasing and fun—bran likes sabine's exasperation and likes it even more when she's honestly surprised or pleased about something—but the longer it goes on, the more it's clear that this isn't just a temporary thing, the more heartfelt and intimate it becomes (I don't think there's actually much feelings talk, but actions speak louder and all that) DAI/ZAREF — there's pretty much no pursuing going on there, tbh. daichi really doesn't flirt, isn't one for grand gestures, and doesn't feel the need to earn anyone's admiration. he's a pretty straightforward person and not interested in chasing after people or imposing himself on anyone (unless he's having a gods talk with ozy I guess), so he was truly willing to let things lie. even their first kiss wasn't really a planned thing, it was just. sometimes you give a boy back months of memories and they're all colored by your admiration and affection and trust in him and then you kiss about it a little, maybe. (they did have a proper talk about it, though. dai is big on talking things out; he needs to know how things lie.) (if there's any kind of pursuing happening, it's dai trying to get zaref to talk to him about his past. which has gone sooooo well so far (jk))

12. How much independence do they prefer in a relationship—do they want to share their lives as much as possible with their partner, or do they prefer to mostly do their own thing and let their partner do their own thing?

BRAN/SABINE — I think they're both good at doing their own thing and coming back together after. bran definitely travels a lot, whether or not sabine comes with. not that either of them would mind sharing things, they're just both pretty independent as people, and I think sometimes they need their space. DAI/ZAREF — dai actively enjoys sharing stuff with zaref and is kind of constantly interested in making space for him. that said, I think they're both pretty content to go off and do their own things, then come back together later—they're both pretty private.

19. Are they okay with public displays of affection? Do they like them?

BRAN/SABINE — bran is pro PDA. that's her wife! everyone should know it! check out her favorite person who she loves!! (I think she probably tones it down a little, especially if sabine isn't into it, but generally speaking yeah, bran will be affectionate anywhere.) DAI/ZAREF — daichi doesn't particularly enjoy public displays of affection. the affection is fine, he just doesn't like the attention. plus the first time he and zaref kissed in public it started a domino effect that led to a horrible blowup fight with his best friend, which was never resolved, so. he's a little PDA shy. (I have no idea what zaref's feelings on PDA are but I'd imagine he's a little less picky about it than daichi, given their past discussions.)

27. They have to apologize to their partner. Is this difficult for them? How do they approach it?

BRAN/SABINE — bran's really good at apologizing, actually. part of her life experience has been fostering good communication skills (can't be captain if you don't know how to work with people!) so she's quite adept at talking about stuff after a fight or misstep. she might need some time to process first, but she'll make sure a conversation happens. DAI/ZAREF — haha wow. this is so relevant. yeah. great. I mean on the one hand, he's good at it; daichi has an enormous responsibility complex and is very good at owning up to things he's done and apologizing for them. he doesn't like to let stuff linger. on the other hand, sometimes you explode yourself right in front of your boyfriend, try to sway him to join your demon army by telling him he'd do well as a soulless soldier of the abyss, and then try to kill him when he turns down your offer, so. maybe sorry doesn't exactly cover that? and you aren't sure how you're going to fix that or make up for any of it? because he's really mad at you (and rightfully so in your opinion)? but you still have to try? (he's gonna go with the straightforward and honest approach and then, uh. see how that goes.)

[cityandking]

zaref and daichi winning back to back hunger games and then getting to know each other in the media circuit afterwards. and then everyone meeting in the quarter quell to make the rebellion's plan happen. (me every day: and what if there was a quarter quell and all the kids got to hang out and do rebellion together. what then)

you're right and you should say it!!!

I just think it would be neat if there's one night in the capital immediately post-games where they won't let him go home yet and he ends up on the roof trying to remember how to exist in his own skin and there's another boy up there who daichi vaguely knows by reputation and for a moment he's not sure if he's allowed to be there or allowed to see anyone but then zaref pats the roof next to him and they just. sit there. and dai can breathe for the first time since they called his name at the reaping

[cityandking]

wanna commission art of daichi and zaref standing back to back and each of them has stabbed themselves through the stomach so it protrudes through the other one's body

[cityandking]

sorry sorry just. the romance of having the person you love right there in arm's reach. and yet never being with them. the exquisite agony. the devotion. the loneliness. I'm gonna eat a chair

[cityandking]

alana suggested a dai/zaref ladyhawke au and I'm gonna be thinking about it forever

[cityandking]

also also also the fact that when dai and zaref had that first open conversation about zaref keeping the void stuff a secret and they promised to have each other's backs, zaref mentioned it was "easier to be someone else" and ever since then daichi has been trying to know the real him. was the person to give him his memories back so he could better know himself. was patiently waiting for zaref to open up about where he came from. im just! im just!!!

[cityandking]

sometimes I think about zaref and I just *starts screaming* *doesn't stop screaming*

[cityandking]

homophobic that my DM put 'lost' on the dai/zaref playlist

[cityandking]

daichi/zaref + "a kiss where it no longer hurts" 0.9k

It isn’t the first time they’ve undressed in front of each other, or even the second, but it’s the first time Zaref pauses, fingers pausing at the small buttons of his tunic. Daichi notices it with half a mind, preoccupied picking at the tiny knot on his undershirt. The ties have begun to fray, and he has trouble separating the strands enough to tie it back tomorrow. He’ll need to replace it soon.

When he finally gets it undone, Zaref is still standing there, watching him. Daichi regards him quietly. It isn’t the first time or the second, but Zaref’s attention is new, steady as a touch. Daichi has always found eyes a heavy weight to carry, but he bears Zaref’s gaze as easily as breathing.

When he stays silent, Daichi clears his throat a little. “Zaref?”

“Does it,” he starts, and his words trail into smoke. Daichi frowns at him and then down at himself, and he understands.

“It’s alright,” he says, finger smoothing over the shiny raised line of scar tissue scored under his sternum. It isn’t all that large, truly; he can cover the length of it with his palm. No wider than a blade, really. No wider than Zaref’s blade.

Neither of them look at the sword where it rests against the wall. Daichi doesn’t often think of it, the sharp, breathless shock of steel sheathed inside his body. Mostly when he thinks of it he remembers Zaref, the green gleam of someone else's control bleeding away, his eyes wholly his own when they met Daichi’s over the hilt. Steady as a touch.

“It doesn’t hurt,” he says, honest. “Here.”

It isn’t the first time they’ve touched or even the second. There are a hundred hundred points of contact between them: the precise strike of a spar and the firm hand of a healer and the quiet touch of a friend. The stained-glass whisper of a kiss. But this is new. Tender.

He’s slow to lend his hand, so Daichi is slow as he steps into his touch, bringing Zaref's palm up to his chest. His fingers are cool against sun-warmed skin, light enough that he barely feels it.

“I’m sorry,” Zaref says, stilted, eyes fixed on the wound. Daichi watches him, the unreadable dark of his gaze, the wisping of his horns. He has taken his hair down for the night, and it falls around his shoulders like moonlight. His touch is so careful.

“It’s alright,” Daichi says again, quieter. He's never wholly sure if Zaref hears him in these moments, so he will say things as often as he must. He presses his hand over Zaref’s, holding it close against the thunder of his heart and the warmth of his body and the tender tract of skin all around his scar. “I’m alright.”

Zaref’s head ducks further, hand pulling back. For a moment Daichi thinks he will move away altogether, but instead he bends in, hunching to press cool lips against the knotted scar. Daichi’s breath catches there in his lungs.

New. This is all new. He doesn't know what to do with it, and doesn't want it to end.

“I’m sorry,” Zaref says again as he straightens, hair a curtain, mouth a firm line. Daichi is helpless with the desire to kiss it, so he does. He likes the way Zaref softens against him. He likes the hand against his chest, palm over scar.

“I know you wouldn’t hurt me,” Daichi tells him. "Not of your own free will." That is something he has never doubted. There have been other mistrusts and silences between them, but not this.

Zaref stays silent. Daichi holds his gaze for a moment, then turns to shrug out of his undershirt, hanging it over the back of a chair.

“You keep me safe,” he continues into Zaref’s careful quiet, pulling on clothes for sleep. “You keep them safe. I rest easier when you’re near at hand.”

With his back turned, he can't see Zaref's face, but he hears the heave of his sigh.

“I should be nearby more often, then,” he says after a moment.

Daichi likes the sound of that almost as much as he likes the wry quirk Zaref’s mouth makes when he turns back around. “My rest would certainly appreciate it,” he agrees, sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting. The quirk becomes more pronounced, and Zaref’s fingers return to the buttons of his shirt, picking them apart.

“I do have your back,” Zaref says later, when the lights are dimmed and they lie together in their borrowed bed. “Even if I haven’t before.”

“I know you do,” Daichi says. He always has, even if he did not understand why or how before. Zaref’s hand finds his chest and Daichi holds it there, feeling his own heartbeat under Zaref's palm. It’s impossible to feel the scar through the soft scrunch of his sleep shirt, but that doesn’t stop either of them. Daichi blinks across the pillow and finds Zaref staring back, shades of silver and black.

“I don’t intend to go anywhere," he says softly, and from the way Zaref flinches, he understands this is the true fear. "I'm right here."

He means it. There are still days when unbeing sounds the better choice, but they grow fewer and further between, and he would be a poor healer, a poor protector, to give in to what is easy over what must be done.

"I know." Zaref’s hand sits against his chest, a reminder. "I believe you."

The belief means more than Daichi knows how to say, so he does not say anything. But his mouth tilts up in the dark, and his sleep, for the first time in some months, is untroubled.

[cityandking]

like to imagine that one of the reasons dai and zaref got close is that sparring is just about the only time daichi lets his anger and frustration out in full force so zaref has been the only one to see that. nothing like getting your weapons training with an added dash of emotional vulnerability