#saintgameplays

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Headcanons: Crankegos ⚙️

Aight, we’re doing this so buckle up, because I got a lot to share!

Note: I consider Memento one, but he’ll be in another post with Mori where I’ll go more into-depth about them both.

Mad Mike

Runs both an ice cream shop and an ice cream truck (he changes outfits depending on which he’s working at).

Once owned a highly successive business.

But it was shutdown after Silver Shepherd discovered that the ice cream was being laced with drugs.

Since then Mike tries to stop doing that..but once in a while he’ll put a tiny bit of cocaine in a scoop or two (claims it’s “extra sugar”).

Loves to bake on his days off.

Contrary to his song, he’s got a soft spot for kids and never drugs their desserts.

Struggles with his own addictions from time-to-time, but he’s getting better at dealing with the withdrawals.

Very flirtatious.

Also fluent in French, so that gives him extra brownie (pun intended) points.

Somehow, someway..he’s evaded police ever since the encounter with Silver.

Not very good at talking about his or other people’s problems...so he usually just whips up some ice cream as a temporary solution!

His eyes turn to pink and blue swirls whenever his sanity dips or if he wants to hypnotize someone who insulted his business practices.

Mike’s just a bubbly guy all around.

Blank

One of Ethan’s less malicious dark egos.

Embodies his anxiety and nightmares (though mainly the former)

Blank himself has severe anxiety issues that tend to make him panic over small things.

Corroded teases him for being a crybaby sometimes, but he can’t help he’s overly-emotional. 

Gets very self-conscious of his acne/black eyes/appearance in general, afraid of scaring people away.

Has bluish-pale gray skin.

Likes wearing baggy clothing, though it’s really only to hide the wilted vines and black veins that wrap around his arms and legs.

When he has a breakdown, black oily tears stream down his face, he shakes violently, the room get abruptly cold, and he mumbles unintelligible gibberish.

It can go on from a few seconds to almost 15 minutes straight. It's extremely hard to snap him out of it.

Has haptephobia (fear of physical contact), but he’ll let people he’s close with (like the other egos) make contact with him.

Hates being thrown in with the rest of the dark egos.

Corroded

The first of Ethan’s dark egos, albeit the more forgettable one.

He’s a rusted robot, with gray/brown skin that’s metallic in some areas (especially on his face and hands).

Completely hollow inside (physically) except for metal “bones” keeping himself together.

His eyes are also empty sockets instead of being purely black.

Like Anti he’s a glitching entity who induces paranoia in people with hushed whispers and clones of himself.

Bitter to Ethan about being used for the 5-year anniversary poster advertisement, despite that not being his intention at all.

Also resents Blank for becoming the more popular dark ego.

Regularly drinks oil.

If you call him an animatronic he can and will decimate you.

His biggest pet peeves are being taken for granted and being called a “dumb robot”.

A major weakness is his legs being so rusted they lock up and he can’t move for a long while.

Heapass

A punkish prisoner who’s best friends with Yancy.

He’s been arrested for smoking illegal drugs, dealing said drugs (with Mike, who managed to escape officers while ditching him in the process), and excessive speeding/reckless driving.

But he was sent to HTP for a fatal hit-and-run (while he was smoking grass behind the wheel).

Doesn’t talk a whole lot, but he likes to stand around and smugly grin like he’s got a trick up his sleeve.

Spoiler: He doesn’t, and if you were to ask Yancy about him he’d tell you Heap is one of the sweetest people he’s had the honor of meeting.

He did break his arm during a brawl (tho he told the warden he fell in the yard).

He’s good at keeping secrets. He has no reason to gossip unless you insult his family.

Also dyed his hair black. Just because.

Jake

Was among the many bright scientists trying to find a cure for the spontaneous zombie plague.

He was also Prof. Beauregard's assistant.

Though unfortunately he didn’t last long before he ended up turning.

Surprisingly he still retains much of his scientific knowledge.

But he can’t wrap his rotting brain around complex formulas.

So he’ll sometimes try to mix chemicals and write notes--both of which turn out to be huge messes.

With the other Crankegos, Jake has his own lab.

He gets agitated easily, so he’ll go there to calm down if he needs to.

Can still speak normally, though his voice is extremely scratchy and he hates repeating himself.

So Yahoo often translates for him.

Likes being with a group of zombies...humans not so much.

Though since the Crankegos aren’t exactly human, he doesn’t mind them at all.

Bernice

She’s the gothic mother hen of the Crankegos.

Though at the same time she’s a vicious mama bear if you dare cross her and/or her family.

She’s stern with Mike and Corroded, but very soft towards Heap, Jake, and Blank.

The prisoner often looks to her as a mother, since he didn’t have the best relationship with his own growing up.

Loved red, black, and silver makeup. Especially eyeshadow and mascara. She makes sure to visit the dye shop every so often to keep her hair a bright red.

No one knows how she pays for all those times. But she does it.

Very sassy and likes to show-off a lot, though she’s not a narcissist. 

She’s very generous, too, and can’t stand the thought of being completely obsessed with only her own happiness.

Don’t ask her if she feels weird being the only female Crankego. She’ll break your kneecaps.

Cries at animal rescue/adoption commercials all the time.

Likes wearing meme shirts to be “hashtag relatable”.

She says it exactly like that and Ethan, Heap, and Mike groan every time she does.

Saint

He’s a very holy man, of course, with much dedication to the church.

While Saint doesn’t say what church (or even what his name is for that matter) he’s from, he practices good teachings.

Scolds people if they constantly curse/take the Lord’s name in vain.

He tried integrating memes into his teachings so younger generations won’t be as bored during mass.

But when Jeremiah (Priestiplier) proofreads his writings..he just shakes his head in disapproval.

So those never see the light of day.

Thinks Blank, Corroded, and Jake are horribly cursed and regularly tries spraying them with holy water.

He just gets three annoyed inhuman beings glaring at him.

Heap and Mike confess their recent sins to him sometimes. It helps them get stuff off their chest.

Though Mike always starts out by saying “I’ve been very naughty-”

And Saint has to stop himself from slapping him with the book.

Beyond that, he’s just an all-around good dude.

Yahoo

Like Bing and Google, he’s a search engine-based android designed to answer people’s questions.

Often speaks in a soft and sincere tone of voice, though he can be firm when necessary.

One of his eyes is more cybernetic than humanlike, and it’s capable of many functions including infrared and x-ray scanners, as well as being able to instantly identify any individual he sees.

That’s how he got to know all of the Crankegos so easily.

He’s on good terms with all the Googles...except for Blue, of course, since he thinks he’s just another rival.

But Yahoo still tries to be kind regardless.

Unfortunately some take advantage of that, though Bernice and Mike usually come to his defense.

He’s terrified of water and viruses..so he tends to stay away from Blank and Corroded.

When he’s recharging, both his eyes glow purple under his eyelids.

He’s got a lot of service features, including Yahoo! Finance (to help with personal finances), Answers (a q&a), and Mail.

Kinda misses the funky logo the company had from 1996-2013

[lum1natrix]

I feel like Ethan as a pope should be an actual ego.

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Saintgameplays

[alterego77]

saintgameplays

i know i know hes supposed to be a pope but....uh....

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

I was bored, so I decided to make some aesthetics for each of Crankgameplays’ egos! (Or at least the ones that I personally consider to be egos)

1. Saintgameplays (Twitter/Instagram/ADWM Bloopers) 2. Mad Mike (ADWM/ADWM Bloopers/Mad Mike) 3. Corroded Crank (Out of Time) 4. Blank (RYC #27) 5. Yahoo (Fan-Made)

I consider Corroded and Blank as two separate dark egos because while we hear Corroded actually speak in a sort of robotic voice in the Out of Time video, we only hear Blank mumble words in the RYC video.

@yahoo-protection-squad You inspired me to make my own vers of Yahoo ^w^ So I hope ya like this~

I̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶I̶ ̶r̶e̶c̶y̶c̶l̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶B̶l̶a̶n̶k̶ ̶m̶o̶o̶d̶b̶o̶a̶r̶d̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶I̶ ̶l̶u̶v̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶m̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶s̶h̶h̶h̶h̶h̶h̶

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

What are your headcanons for the Crankegos?? (Saw someone call Ethan's egos that and I LOVE that name!)

Ooooooooo I never thought anyone would ask.

*cracks knuckles* Well strap in because I have a LOT that I wanna share~ ^^

@yahoo-protection-squad Hope you don’t mind the tag, I figured you may like to read this, too.

Saintgameplays (Saint)

-He’s a pope, what do you expect?-He tries his best to keep up with the cool kids.-But he will lecture them if he catches them cursing.-Actually gets along with Wilford surprisingly well.-Integrates memes and Vine references into his teachings.-“And I say unto you: Adam and Eve are my OTP and the only thing I vape is the Holy Ghost. Amen” is his favorite.-Signature phrase is “Bless up fam”.-V terrified/wary of Dark, Anti, Blank, and Corroded.-If he has to be in the same room with any of them he will always carry Holy Water in a mini-spray bottle.-He’s actually a very good listener.-The other Crank/Iplier/Septic egos often go to him to confess or simply get things off their chest (e.g. Chase with his divorce and Wilford with the people he’s murdered) and he will always keep them a secret no matter what.-Just a v pure and good dude in general who has done no wrong.

Mad Mike (Mike)

-Runs an ice cream shop and an ice cream truck (changes outfits depending on which job he’s doing).-And he’s also a drug dealer-Once owned a successful business but it shutdown after many lawsuits regarding drugs being found in the frozen desserts.-To this day, though, he still sells them illegally just because he can.-A LOT little bit on the crazy and giggly side.-Anti and Wilford have taken a liking to him because of his insane nature and his clever and malicious schemes.-Does harbor a soft spot for kids, though, and will give them non-drugged ice cream sandwiches.-But even so Chase still doesn’t trust him around his kids.-Steals drugs from Dr. Iplier’s clinics after his drug ring became busted by Silver Shepherd and Jackieboy Man.-Likes to hum/sing his “Mad Mike” song a lot.-Loves to wink and say “wink-wonk”, too.-V flirtatious.-Always manages to evade the cops no matter what.-Has the quickest reflexes out of all the Crankegos, so he’s excellent at dodging gunfire and making quick escapes.

Corroded Crank (Corroded)

-One of two of Ethan’s dark egos.-Has a rusted, grey/brown skin tone.-Under the surface he has metal in place of bones and wires in place of veins, although his blood and organs are still human.-Eyes are hollow, empty sockets as opposed to being pure black.-Has incredibly neat handwriting even though his hand trembles violently when he writes.-Much like Anti he is capable of glitching around and creating hallucinations (mostly in the form of hushed, unintelligible whispers and clones of himself).-Also capable of inducing paranoia on his victims.-Despises Ethan because he believes he was only created to serve as a cheap “advertising strategy” for the 5-year anniversary posters.-Because of that he will threaten anyone who tries to use him for their own personal benefit.-Will also lash out at anyone who thinks he’s just “copying” the other dark egos.-Gets along well with Dark, Anti, and Blank.-Although at times he does like to tease Blank about his anxiety.-He is actually rather protective of Yahoo and doesn’t want anyone to take advantage of him, either.

Blankgameplays (Blank)

-The second, but less malicious, dark ego.-Is the literal embodiment of Ethan’s anxiety and nightmares.-Has very bad anxiety issues which cause him to mumble a lot and make mountains out of molehills.-He is somewhat self-conscious of his black eyes and is afraid he will scare people away if he looks at them.-Suffers from haphephobia, although he will accept hugs from people he considers as friends.-Hates being compared to Anti and Dark, as he does not wish to hurt his creator nor manipulate his fans.-Cries a lot, and when he does he sheds black, oil-like tears.-During a breakdown he’ll mumble unintelligible gibberish for a while without pausing to take a breath (his worst one had him mumbling for a solid hour).-Should that happen he’ll only accept comfort from either one of the other Crank egos (except for Corroded who only taunts him) or someone that he trusts.-If Mike finds him in such a state, he will sit next to him and offer him ice cream, the best type of comfort food.-Tries his best to be a kind person and break the stereotype that all “dark” egos are automatically evil.-Saint is still apprehensive of him, but eventually he does see the good he’s trying to do and warms up to him.-Loves wearing baggy jackets/hoodies.-He’s also fascinated by plants, even the wilted and dried-out ones.-Bim would often lend him a couple of his plants and teach him how to properly take care of them.

Yahoogameplays (Yahoo)

-A search engine android similar to Google and Bing.-Speaks in a soft and sincere tone of voice.-His primary adjective is to “Answer questions as quickly as possible”.-When charging, his eyes will glow purple.-When fully charged he feels more energized that ever, as he’ll bounce around, laugh, and hug any friend that may be in the vicinity.-His special feature is in his left eye, which, upon activation, allows him to take X-Ray scans, see through walls, detect infrared light, and acquire any new information that is not already in his files.-He’s always willing to lend a hand to anyone that needs it.-Saint often asks him to look up Vines/memes/anything that is currently trending for him to incorporate in his teachings.-He’ll assist Mike if he needs advice on how to run a shop or what drugs are not too lethal to put into ice cream…despite him not approving of his business whatsoever.-He is usually the one Blank goes to for comfort, as he knows how to help him through his anxiety attacks.-Has an intense fear of glitches and water, due to the fact both can short-circuit him and corrupt his systems.-Because of this he avoids Anti at all costs, but he’s fine around Corroded, who he sees as an older brother of sorts.

Bernice-The sort of “Mother Hen” and “Mama Bear” of the group.-Absolutely LOVES the color red.-Catch her at the dye shop at least once a month where she’ll make sure her hair stays a lovely crimson.-Loves red, black, and glittery makeup.-Can and will fight anyone who makes fun of the egos even if they just give them a funny look.-Her anger is equivalent to or even greater than Darkiplier’s so messing with her or her brothers is pretty much a death sentence-She loves her brothers dearly, although she doesn’t like that Corroded makes fun of Blank and is usually the one who steps in when she sees the bullying going on.- Has a v sassy personality but inside she’s a real softie.-Especially when it comes to her family or anything that has to do with animals.-9/10 she’ll cry over the pet rescue/shelter commercials.-Usually asks Yahoo to look up beauty tutorials for her.-May have asked Dark for advice on eyeshadow at some point.-She’s the one who suggested that Mike give kids drug-free ice cream sandwiches even though she disapproves of his shop in general.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Imagine someone singing (or lip syncing) “Going To Hell” by The Pretty Reckless to Saintgameplays. HEHEHEHEHE

Omfg I just listened to it and-

The poor boi would be so Shook™ and just clutch his cross necklace for dear life.

[lum1natrix]

SAINTGAMEPLAYS IM DYING

I’VE BEEN LAUGHING EVER SINCE I ANSWERED IT HELP

SAINTGAMEPLAYS