As a young white woman who define myself as a 'snowbunny', but also used to struggle about being open and honest about my preference towards black men, I see a dire need to redefine the term 'snowbunny'!
When I see how the term 'snowbunny' is being used, I almost always see it in a sexual context where the term 'snowbunny' almost is a synonym for a sex-crazed white woman who focus merely on shallow physical desires. That's not what it means to me at all being a snowbunny and it honestly breaks my heart when people use it like this! To me, being a snowbunny means that I have a romantic and intimate preference towards black men. It means that I have the utmost and deepest respect for black men and black culture and that I see myself as a progressive young woman who has a deep emotional and romantic attraction towards black men. Of course this attraction also entails a physical attraction, but this is only a small part of the deep bond us snowbunnies share with black men.
I really think we need to redefine what it means to be a 'snowbunny', so that more young white women who have a preference towards black men can identify with- and feel comfortable coming out as 'snowbunnies'. The way we use the term today honestly alieanates many young women and thats such a shame! I used to date white boys when I was younger because I was afraid of being labelled as the type of girl who only focused on sex and physical attraction. I knew how my affection towards black men couldn't be trivialised and simplified to that, so I was afraid to call myself snowbunny. I think many white girls want to be open about their feelings about black guys and if we manage ro redefine the term 'snowbunny', I feel almost certain that we'll see WAY more young women coming out as 'snowbunnies'.
I KNOW that many young white women endure relationships with white boys because of how snowbunnies are being stigmatised and how it makes them feel miserable, unfulfilled and insecure! How do I know this? Because I used to be one of those girls and because I know many young women who hide their attraction towards black men because of the stigmatised perception poeple have! Today I'm a happy and proud snowbunny who are open about my feelings and I'm finally able to 'say no to white boys' and be the snowbunny I want to be!
I know this post won't change how people use the term 'snowbunny' over night, but I just felt I needed to put it out there to help other white women coming to terms with being a snowbunny and to feel comfortable and happy about how they feel. There are no shame in being a snowbunny just as there are no same in saying no to white boys!
This video is emblematic of today's western society. Husband taking pics of his wife and daughters with a black man. Wife flirting with him right in front of her husband. Daughters watching and learning.
Do I as a white girl support the "say no to white boys" movement?
As a white girl who have declared herself openly as a snowbunny, I often get the question whether or not I support the "say no to whiteboys movement". To me this is definitely not a simple question to answer as I both support women saying "no to whiteboys" but support women who are happy being with whiteboys.
First of all I definitely 100% acknowledge this movement to be happening where white women reject and deny white boys and date black men. I'm one of these women and I experience more and more girls my age and girls who are younger than me saying no to whiteboys. I think its a beautiful thing that women are finally standing their ground and follwing their hearts and denying whiteboys when they are exclusively attracted to black men.
I have been in a few relationships with whiteboys when I was younger and looking back I really had to compromise with my feelings to be with a whiteboy and even though I was miserable, I did it to "fit in" and because I was afraid of being labeled a slut if I came out as a girl who were attracted to black men. Fortunately this has changed these past years where its now fully acceptable and maybe even a symbol of status (at least among white women) for a white girl to date a black man. I see more and more white women (some of my closest girlfriends included) saying no to whiteboys and being happy about this choice and dating black men exclusively. As this is what makes them (and me) happy I fully support this choice and we finally live in a time where women get to choose without being shamed or wrongly labelled. I know many white men struggle to accept this happening and struggle to accept white women dating black men exclusively and permanently saying "no to whiteboys", but thats really just too bad. White men HAVE to accept and HAVE to cope with more and more of us girls going black and seeing the "say no to whiteboys" movement spreading at an increasingly faster rate, because this is beyond their power and this isn't about them! I understand how it may be heartbreaking and difficult for a whiteboy seeing their crush dating a black man and maybe even starting her family with a black man, but that's just how it is and that's how it used to be for both white women and black men in the past! Today many of us white girls choose black men as our life partners and this is just how things are. So do I support the "say no to whiteboys" movement? YES I do! When women freely choose to date black men exclusively! Do I support it as something every single white women should do and something political or structural? Of course not! But more and more of us choose black men and reject white boys as our partners and that's a good thing! Women should choose the partner they are attracted to!