#schlosts

[whiteclaw-swagger]

canceling connor right now look at this shit

[tubb0-underscore]

from that one discord chat me, baron, n button had about electric guitar wilbur!!! Murder ghost : )

[noirandchocolate]

Temperance Successes

Member Pat Pat Smith (only three names, well done! No one would know!) is now making a good clean living for herself as a high-wire artiste, performing nightly without a net and, on occasion, without a wire.

Member Theo Cupier (good common name!) of the Quirm Mission reports no ‘wrong’ thoughts for six months!  We wish him every success in his new life as a physical training instructor at the College for Young Ladies.  There is a vampire prepared to test his resolution!

Warmest wishes to ‘Henry’ von Schlost, who has put our legendary control over lesser animals to good effect with the ‘Children of the Night’ dog obedience school.  He reports that on his command not only all the dogs but several of the owners will Lie Down and Play Dead.  Well done, ‘Henry!’

--Terry Pratchett and Stephen Briggs, “The Ankh-Morpork Archives”

[gh0stfri3nd]

thinkin' about how glatt could've been schlost

[whiteclaw-swagger]

are material belongings important to you?

you could say that, yeah. i have a few tools and items that mean a lot to me, let me take some pictures...

first, here's my babygirl cupid. wilbur got it for me for christmas last month, and she's got a hell of a kick. she sparkles, but the communicator camera doesn't pick it up great

here’s my sword, whiteclaw swagger. i think tommy helped name it? it’s a portmanteau of whiteclaw (the alcohol) and whiteboy swagger (the thing), and it’s a pretty good sword to use

here’s my cane. i got it from my dad way back, since i have muscle and join issues mostly in my legs. it’s the reason i can’t run or swim well, but the cane makes me at least run faster. it’s pretty cool, i don’t want to lose this damn thing

i’d send my ring, but.... i don’t have it anymore.

[whiteclaw-swagger]

Karma is swift when someone delivers it, you would know that now. Figure yourself out and make things right eventually.

:D

listen man. i know this is from @beached-badboyhalo, and i get what you mean, but jesus christ, you didn't have to kill me for it? you told me that you wanted to "come talk" and shit, and then you end up killing me? kinda manipulative of you, mr. therapist...

but i guess i deserved it.

check out this gnarly scar you gave me, though, from the 2 times you've decapitated me now

[whiteclaw-swagger]

are you gay

yeah, you could say i'm gay. i have 3 husbands as of right now. there's quackity, jack, and.. wilbur. they're sweet, but i guess we do have our ups and downs. won't say too much though, it's personal shit i don't want to have online

here's a picture of the 4 of us when we got together, at wilbur's tea party he invited us all out to. this is .. shit, what, like 3 months old now? time flies, man

if you were asking for general sexuality, i don't think i remember any part of me that wasn't.. a man liker? but everyone around here has HELLA amnesia, so who fuckin knows. there's only 2 girls in the area, and one of them is my besties, soo

[whiteclaw-swagger]

eventful day today, jesus christ i’m worn the fuck out dhmu 

[whiteclaw-swagger]

if anyone has any questions about the breakup or where i'm staying right now, shoot me a message in my inbox

[whiteclaw-swagger]

hey guys, welcome to the blog. it's your favorite boy jschlatt here back at it again on the communicator! no idea if any of the people i know have one of these, but maybe i can reach people from outside.. wherever we are?

i live in michaelmcville, where the mayor is (you guessed it), michael mchill. there's about... what, 20? people around here, and there's another nation called margaritaville nearby too.

send me anything you want to, i don't mind what it is LOL go for it and enjoy your stay

[whiteclaw-swagger]

dude i hate that your eyes get super puffy after a long cry, like people do NOT need to know that ty

[whiteclaw-swagger]

miss the tv

miss who i used to watch it with, too

[whiteclaw-swagger]

do you have a safe living space? worried about you, man.

here's a picture of my place. sorry the quality isn't great, my communicator's camera is busted from water damage or something

i think the place is alright, i found a cave outside of mcville and made it my own home i guess. pretty cozy if i do say so myself

don't worry about me, i think i can take care of myself alright. thanks for the concern though

[whiteclaw-swagger]

ring didnt fit did it

how did you know this? i never wore it anywhere because i was scared to lose it. only the guys knew... who are you? what the fuck?

[whiteclaw-swagger]

to anyone who doesn't know... i broke it off with the rest of the polycule. i thought they'd be better off without me. sorry to everyone i've hurt.

[whiteclaw-swagger]

canceling connor right now look at this shit