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cashmeremars · 11 months

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𝐚 𝐜𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐞... 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 || 𝐬.𝐦

pairing: shawn mendes x reader

summary: shawn stumbles upon a coffee shop while on tour and becomes infatuated with the waitress

word count: 1.7k+

a/n: this has been in my drafts for so long... but i promise you’re in for a surprise...

The heat of Amsterdam was relentless as Shawn continued to roam the unfamiliar streets of the city. Crossing bridges and tripping over loose rubble, Shawn sighed as his eyes scanned the stores lining the streets, hoping to find a place to settle down before heading back to his tour bus. He watched as a bicycle rider rode past him before slowing down and stopping at what seemed to be a cafe. He adjusted his jacket before reaching for his phone and checking the time. He had around 2 hours before he was expected to be back on the tour bus. Shawn smiled to himself as he followed the path the bicycle rider had just taken to get to the cafe down the street.

As Shawn approached the front door of the cafe, he snapped a quick picture of the shop name just in case he needed to send his location to his manager. A mellow bell rang throughout the cafe as he pushed the door open. The smell of cinnamon and warm coffee danced through the air as he inhaled. The cafe was quaint, with landscape paintings lining the walls. Jazz music whispered under the sound of clanking dishes.

Shawn sighed as he sat himself down at a booth nearest to the corner of the cafe, to ensure that no potential fans could spot him. The cafe was quite empty, as it was 2 pm on a weekday. A stained menu on the side of the table caught his eye. He reached over with a sigh, grabbing the corners of the menu to avoid touching the brown stains. A frown etched itself on his forehead as he flipped through the menu, the words splattering the page were close enough to English to follow along, but not enough to fully comprehend. Dutch, Shawn whispered to himself. He was in Amsterdam after all.

Shawn dropped the menu, opting to fiddle with the slightly tattered fabric of the booth, watching silhouettes walk past the cafe window. He closed his eyes, bopping his head along to the music flooding the cafe.

“Are you new here?” A voice intruded Shawn’s entrancement.

“Uh, yeah,” Shawn spoke. He felt his breath constrict as he made eye contact with you. He’d truly never seen anyone as beautiful. “How could you tell?” Shawn spoke with a soft smile. He felt his heartbeat begin to pick up.

“I’ve never seen you around here before, and you also looked a little clueless,” You point out with a laugh.

“Oh, uh, sorry. I’m just here on tour. I’m a singer,” Shawn explains.

“That’s cool,” you reply, raising your eyebrows.

“Yeah. Grammy-nominated,” Shawn stammered. You nod, and his face flushed as he acknowledged his failed attempt at boasting.

“Right,” you smile before pulling out a notepad and pen from your waist apron, “So, what would you like to order?” you say after a beat of silence.

“Right. Right, of course.” Shawn stammered, “I don’t really know what’s good here, and I can’t really read the menu,” He says, scratching the back of his neck.

“Ahh. I’m assuming you want me to tell you?” you question.

“If that’s what you want, then sure. Tell me what’s good here.” Shawn spoke as he leaned forward on the table, leaning his head on his hand. He watched as you twirled the pen between your fingers. You were mesmerizing to him. You had an aura that was carefree yet so captivating.

“What do you like?” you ask, quirking an eyebrow.

“Something sweet,” Shawn spoke, “like you,” he continued with a speck of confidence.

“Oh. I see.” You hesitate to laugh.

“Sorry, was that a bit much?” He asked as his confidence crumbled.

“Yeah, it was a little cheesy,” You reply, tapping the notepad with your pen.

“Right.” Shawn’s could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks.

“You still want something sweet?” You asked. He perked up as he sensed remnants of a flirty subtext. “On the menu, I mean.” You clarify, now just as flustered as Shawn was just a moment ago.

“Yeah for sure. Maybe a brownie?” he fumbled with the menu once more, hoping that he’d ordered something that was an actual option.

“Anything else?” You ask keeping your eyes on the notepad as you scribble Shawn’s order.

“A cup of coffee,” Shawn took a deep breath in, “And your number?” he exhaled, squinting slightly to gauge your reaction. Your pen halts as your eyes pan to his.

“Uh, coming right up.” You tilt your head before making your way back to the counter.

Shawn sighed deeply once you were out of sight. He hadn’t realized that he wasn’t breathing properly until you’d left, leaving him to stew in his own embarrassment. He’d never behaved so awkwardly in his life, and yet you didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. He could’ve chalked it up to your food service hospitality, but he sensed a glint of something unfamiliar in your eyes. She was charmed, he thought to himself.

***

“Your order, sir.” You carefully place the coffee in front of Shawn before positioning the brownie a bit off to the side. The smell of fresh cocoa from the brownie melted his senses as he eyed the careful foam art floating on top of his coffee. He’d definitely have to visit again.

“Shawn,” he said, “Mendes. Shawn Mendes.” He continued, placing his hand on his chest briefly. He watched her carefully in hopes that she’d recognized his name.

“Already skipping the formalities?” You say as you wipe your hands on your apron.

“Sure are.” He replies, “You don’t have a name tag?” He asked, eyeing the spot on your shirt where your name tag should be.

“Yeah,” You took a quick look down at your uniform and shrugged, “It keeps me mysterious,” You continued.

“Mysterious. That’s cool.” Shawn nods once, pursing his lips.

“Very,” you reply, glancing around the cafe briefly.

“Do I get to know your name?” Shawn said as you began to walk away.

“But then what would happen to the mystery?” You quipped before disappearing behind the counter once again.

The soft music tangled with the saccharine aroma of the coffee. He closed his eyes, as he revelled in the serene atmosphere of the empty cafe. There were no fans to bombard him, and no cameras to observe him. Nobody to perform for, or to pretend for. Just him, a cup of coffee, a brownie, and a girl who made his heart spring.

Shawn scrolled through his phone as he gradually made his way through the honeyed meal. He watched his DMs flood full of Instagram models and influencers, but none of them compared to the waitress whose name he didn’t even know.

“Here’s your bill, Shawn.” You lay the piece of paper in front of Shawn’s empty cup, and crumb-filled plate.

“Thank you.” He looks up with a smile that crinkles the corners of his eyes, “So, when can I get your number?” He asks.

“It’ll be a surprise.” you shrug.

“So, are you always working here?” Shawn asks as you’re about to walk away once again.

“I work on weekends if that’s what you’re asking” you reply, “Is there a reason why you need to know, Shawn?” you asked.

“Well, I’m only here this week for my concert, so-”

“You’re gonna try to woo me over during the short period of time you’re here?” You squint your eyes at him.

“Precisely,” He quipped.

“Well, you’re very persistent, Shawn.”

“I usually am.” Shawn knew that wasn’t true. Truthfully, he was always nervous whenever he had to speak to a girl he was fond of. He was already quite introverted as is, and speaking to you made him feel like he had frogs in his throat.

“Charming. Well, we’ll see how your quest goes,” you laugh.

“When do you get off work?” he asked.

“Later tonight,” you said.

“Then, I’ll be waiting right here.” Shawn folds his hands together, placing them on the table.

“Of course, you will, Prince Charming,” you raise your eyebrows in amusement as you lean over to collect the empty cup and plate.

“Does that make you my Cinderella?” he asked.

“I see the wooing has begun. Too bad I have to get back to my shift,” you turn, leaving him with the bill.

Shawn grabbed his wallet from his back pocket, paying for the bill before texting his manager that he might be back a little later than expected.

“Excuse me? Are you Shawn?” A man with bulky glasses and a thick accent approached the table with a stone-cold expression.

“Yes, I am.” Shawn’s back straightened instinctively as he felt himself start to tense.

“Well, I’m going to have to ask you to leave,” He gestures to the door and sends a single nod of his head in Shawn’s direction.

“Pardon?” Shawn locks his phone, placing it on the table.

“Well, it seems that your excessive flirting with one of our employees has made her quite uncomfortable, to say the least,” The man explains. Shawn looks down and notices the similarities between the man uniform and the waitress’s uniform. He also notices the name tag sitting neatly on the man’s black shirt.

“What?” Shawn’s eyebrows furrow together. He was hoping that he’d misheard due to the man’s accent.

“You asked for her number, what days she worked, what time she gets off, and then said that you would stay until she was done working. I mean, that’s a bit much don’t you think, sir?” The man folded his arms as his face remained stoic.

“I was just trying to-” Shawn hesitates to explain. He knew that he was awkward and nervous at times, but he didn’t expect that he could misread a situation so incorrectly.

“It doesn’t matter what you were trying to do. It very clearly did not work,” The man said. His gaze bores into Shawn’s. The longer the man stared, the more Shawn felt his own composure falter. “Will you be leaving?” The man asked. Shawn snaps out of his fear-induced trance, scrambling for his phone as he shoves his wallet into his back pocket.

“Oh, sorry. Yeah, I’ll get going. Tell her I’m sorry about all of that.” Shawn’s hands flail wildly as he tries to explain while struggling to get out of his seat.

“Thank you for visiting our coffee shop. You probably shouldn’t come back.” The man pats Shawn’s back as he escorts him out of the cafe.

“Yeah, uh… yeah, thank you for the experience,” He mumbled.

Shawn left the shop with a belly full of coffee, a half-eaten brownie, and the urge to throw it all up.

masterlist

fic recs

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes one shot #shawn mendes imagines #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes x fem!reader

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itsamendesmadness · 1 year

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Thinking of you

Shawn Mendes x Female reader

Summary: The reader receives a gift from Shawn while he is away on a guy's trip.

Warning(s): SEX TOYS MASTURBATION

a/n: I had so much fun writing this piece. I think it's my best work so far. Remember to reblog if you want to see more stuff like this. Don’t be afraid to comment. 🫶✨

The constant ringing of your phone wakes you up. You disconnect it from its charger and roll to the other side of the bed. You have two missed calls from Shawn and decide to call him back. Just in case something happened.

*Phone rings*

“Good. You’re awake” a brisk voice answers the phone. Causing you to instantly blush of how excited he sounded just to hear back from you. “Hey babe, is everything alright?” you respond to the cheerful guy. “Yes. Everything is alright. I just got a little anxious going into the airport, but I felt better when Mike arrived.” You could tell he was trying to mask how anxious he really got. “Airports are anxiety inducing. I totally get it.” you say trying to validate his feelings. “Yeah. Thank you, y/n. Anyways, I ordered a little something for you. It should be at the door any minute now.” he says. “Mmm… I wonder what it could be.” you respond jokingly.

After a little while of talking on the phone with Shawn. You get an alert on your phone from the outdoor security camera detecting movement. “It's here” you tell Shawn who is still on the phone with you. You proceed to put him on speaker and head to the door. When you opened it you didn't expect what you were seeing. It was a picnic basket with a bouquet of red carnations wrapped in brown kraft paper. Inside laid a beautiful plate of chocolate waffles with strawberries on top and just beside it there was a small pink bag with sparkly tissue paper.

You struggle getting the basket inside without it tumbling to the ground. Shawn is laughing at the sound of you grunting trying to lift the basket onto the kitchen counter. “Babe, stop laughing. If you make me laugh my arms get even more weak.” you comment laughing. “I’ll stop. Damn… I really miss you.” you could tell he was telling the truth from the change in his tone. “Do you see a little bag?” he asks. “Yes. I am opening it now.” The tissue paper ruffles as you take it out of the bag revealing the inside. “Omg! Shawn!” you scream.

You take the item out. You feel your face getting instantly red. “I wish I could see your face right now.” He responds playfully. You’ve never owned a toy before of any shape or form…not even vibrating panties. Well, there is clearly a first time for everything.

“Umm… Should I put them on?” you ask him nervously. “Yes, but first I am switching to FaceTime.” The phone rings changing into FaceTime. You answer the phone and place it leaning on a vase in your kitchen counter. This way Shawn could get a good view of everything. The black laced fabric tickles your soft skin as you put them on. “Oh- they look so good on you.” he says as he comes into view. His hands flew to rest on his head. “I love how you look with just a top and panties.” he says, biting his lip.

You feel so good when he talks that way about you. You love when he reassures you.

“Doesn't this need a remote?” you ask him. “Yes, I have it…It’s an app on my phone so I can control it at anytime, anywhere. Saying this, I want you to wear them all day.” he responds with a smirk on his face. “You are so bad” you respond. “Look, I have to go now, but please don’t take them off, okay?” he says. “Okay. Bye. I love you” you respond. “I love you.” he says as he hangs up.

The fact of having to wear this all day knowing that it could go off at any given moment gave you massive anxiety. You needed to get some stuff done for the apartment before Shawn came back from the guy’s trip, so you went to the grocery store. You threw on some sweatpants and one of his baggy white shirts to try and disguise the fact that there is a bullet sized vibrator inside your panties.

Arriving at the grocery store everything is running smoothly. He still hasn't activated it. At this point you thought it was all a joke and he really wasn't going to do anything. He probably wanted you to die of anticipation or embarrassment. You proceed to cross things off your list. This was going to take a while because you took the shopping cart with the bad wheel. Every movement you made a squeak followed.

You found yourself at the cereal aisle when a subtle buzz started coming from your pants. “Oh- fuck.” you said out loud. The old lady next to you stared at you with a serious face. “These prices are crazy right?” you said to her trying to hide that your man was having a field day in your pants. Shawn was going crazy with the buttons, alternating from slow to fast. You can’t deny it felt so good, but this can’t be happening right now. Not at the grocery store. You grab the cereal and sprint to the cash register to pay for the few items you crossed off.

Luckily there weren't a lot of people in line. You crossed your legs and acted like you really needed to pee. Hopefully, this would help you distract yourself.

You finally paid for everything, grabbed the bags and fast walked to your car. “God. Fuck.” you screamed getting into your car. You rested your head on the steering wheel to hide your face from the people walking up and down the parking lot as you came in your panties. “Wtf?!” you said laughing. You grabbed your phone to text Shawn.

Phone messages read:

Shawn: How was it?

y/n: I came in my car at the grocery store parking lot.

Shawn: Baby, you are so bad.

y/n: Shut up! I love you.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes blurb #Shawn Mendes Imagine #smut #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes x you

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storiesforallfandoms · 2 years

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neglected ~ shawn mendes

word count: 2091

request?: yes!

“hiii, here’s a shawn mendes x reader request i had since you’re requests are open now…

so what if the reader joins shawn on tour but starts feeling left out because shawn is only paying attention to his friends and then eventually the reader gets fed up of it and just snaps at shawn. then they have a fight about it, but at the end it’s all fluffy.

love u, stay safe :)”

description: when he starts neglecting her while on tour, she has enough and decides to voice her frustrations

pairing: shawn mendes x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two)

Going on tour with your boyfriend for the first time should’ve been a magical experience. Getting to watch him perform every night, getting to go to the after parties with him to celebrate, spending a lot of alone time together in hotel rooms and the tour bus. How could it not be the time of your life?

That’s what you expected anyways. Reality was not as amazing as you thought.

You knew that Shawn would be busy. You didn’t expect him to drop his work to spend time with you. You didn’t want him to do that anyways; you were actually very excited to watch him perform and to be there for his shows and soundchecks.

No, it wasn’t the work that was making this experience less stellar than you expected. It was Shawn’s friends and his attention towards them.

You loved Shawn’s friends and you were glad they agreed to come on the tour for a while as well. Shawn had been having a hard time mentally on tour so you suggested that he bring some of his friends with him to help him feel more at home while on the road. At first, you were glad to see that it was working and to see how happy Shawn was. But then you started to notice how much more time and attention he was giving his friends versus how much he was giving you. It got to a point where he wouldn’t even notice you weren’t there.

Like the night that everything finally came to a head for you.

You had been to Shawn’s show, cheering for him from your VIP section. When the show finished, you went backstage to meet up with everyone. You were almost shocked when Shawn immediately ran up to you and gave you a big kiss.

“We’re going out for after show drinks,” he told you. “You’re coming with us, right?”

“Of course,” you said. “I gotta go to the bathroom first. I had one too many sodas during the show.”

Shawn chuckled and kissed you again before letting you go.

You were buzzing with excitement as you quickly did your business and washed your hands. You were hopped up on post show adrenaline and the excitement of being invited to the night out. You didn’t want to leave the guys waiting for too long.

Once you stepped out of the bathroom, though, you found the backstage area empty except for Shawn’s manager. He looked at you in shock when you appeared.

“I thought you were going to the after party,” he said.

“I am,” I said. “I mean, I thought I was. Are they all gone?”

“Yeah, they left a few minutes ago.”

You bit back the hurt you were feeling. You were sure this was a misunderstanding. Maybe they were waiting for you outside.

But when you went out back where the car had been, all you saw was the tour bus and the stage crew carrying the equipment out. A lump was forming in your throat as you dialed Shawn’s number. You let it ring until it went to voicemail, then tried again to the same results.

Suddenly, your sadness washed away and was replaced with anger. You couldn’t believe that he left you! He invited you to go, he was the one who brought it up to you, and for the quick five minutes you were in the bathroom, he left!

You were fuming as you ordered an Uber to the arena. Most of the fans had cleared out by now, so you were safe to stand in the front of the arena as you waited for your Uber to arrive. You hoped your driver wasn’t very talkative because you truly were not in the mood for small talk.

Your driver gave you a small smile as you got in. “Coming from the concert?”

“Yeah,” you deadpanned.

“Oh, that doesn’t sound good. Was it not a good show?”

“It was a good show until the end,” you muttered, turning to look out the window to signify to your driver that you were finished with the conversation.

You uttered a small “thank you” as you got out of the car at the hotel you were staying in. Your anger had started melting away in the car ride over, so now instead of the angry stomp you had planned, you were just barley dragging your feet to the elevator. You watched as the numbers ticked upwards until the soft ding filled your ears and the doors opened on your floor.

Your and Shawn’s shared hotel room wasn’t too far from the elevator, luckily, because all you wanted to do now was lay down in bed and cry. You couldn’t believe Shawn had so easily forgotten you, and now he wasn’t even answering your calls. This was supposed to be the time of your life, and instead all you felt was sadness. Part of you just wanted to pack your things and go home. It wasn’t like Shawn would even notice you weren’t there.

You were debating booking the next flight out of there and back home as you laid down in bed, but the minute your head hit the pillow your tears were unleashed. You curled up into a ball, allowing the tears to flow freely down your cheeks and soak into the pillow beneath you until you eventually cried yourself to sleep.

~~~~~~

You were awoken to the sound of a loud bang. You jumped awake, thinking someone was breaking into your room or something. It wasn’t until you heard a familiar laugh that you realized it was just Shawn finally coming back from his “after party”.

You looked over at your phone to see it was 3am. About time he got back.

Shawn switched on the light in the room without warning, causing you to yelp as you quickly covered your eyes.

“Shit, I’m so sorry baby,” he said. “I didn’t think you’d be awake.”

“Hard to sleep when you’re banging around the room and laughing at the top of your lungs,” you grumped. You blinked your eyes, trying to adjust to the bright light and to get rid of the spots currently in your vision.

You looked up to see Shawn had that goofy smile on his face that you normally loved to see. You knew this meant he had had a good night, which usually you’d be happy about. But the events of the night were still fresh on your mind and you weren’t about to let him get away with neglecting you this time.

“Did you have a good night?” you asked him.

“Oh yeah, it was great! We went to this local bar that had a local band playing. We drank a bunch, played some pool. One of the guys in the band recognized me and let me get up on stage with them. I actually followed all of them, I’m gonna post a video of them performing on my story and hope it helps them gain a bunch of followers.”

“Sounds awesome. Thank you so much for including me in your oh so fun boy’s night.”

Shawn looked up at you, a confused look on his face. He was finally registering the sarcasm dripping from your tone.

“What do you mean? I invited you to come, babe.”

“Yeah you did, and about five minutes later while I was in the bathroom, you fucking left me at the arena!”

“What? No, I - ”

“Yes you did, Shawn! I went to the bathroom, I told you I’d be back and I’d be down to going out after your show, and then when I did come back from the bathroom you had just up and left me! No texts, no calls, no telling me where you were going. Just gone without a trace. You didn’t even text me to see if I had gotten back here safe from the arena.”

His face was turning a light shade of pink. “I just thought...I mean I knew you would’ve - ”

“Don’t lie, Shawn,” you cut him off. “You didn’t think of me at all. You just wanted to go out and have a good time with your friends. Who gives a fuck if your girlfriend is there or not, even though you were the one who invited me to come along with you guys.”

“Hey, you were the one who told me to invite the guys on the tour with me.”

“Yes, I did. I’m not claiming that I didn’t. I did that because I knew you were having a rough time mentally on the tour and I thought it would help to have your friends here with you. But what I didn’t think would happen would be that you were spending all your time with them and none of it with me!”

“That’s not true! I do spend time with you!”

“When? When was the last time we hung out without your friends, Shawn? When was the last time we did something outside of the hotel rooms and the tour bus and the backstage areas, just the two of us, without your friends? Tell me.”

You crossed your arms and looked at him, expectantly. He was silent and you could tell by the look on his face that he didn’t have any response.

“That’s what I thought,” you said.

“Okay, maybe we haven’t been spending much time together lately, but you’ve been on tour with me longer than the guys have. I spent time with you before they were here, and now I should be spending time with you while they’re here? That doesn’t seem fair.”

Your anger came to a boil. You got up from the bed and got so close to Shawn that you were basically in his face. He had to take a step away from you because you were so close, your anger radiating off of you.

“I was on tour with you a whole week before the guys came! So don’t pull that shit on me! I have every right to be upset about the fact that you have been neglecting me in favor of your friends. I love them to pieces, and you know that, but I do not love you shoving me to the side because of them. If you don’t want to spend time with me, just tell me so I can pack my shit and go home.”

You didn’t realize you had started crying again until Shawn reached out and wiped the tears from your cheeks with his thumbs. He held your head in his hands, sadness written on his face.

“I’m so sorry, (Y/N),” he said. “You’re right, the way I’ve been treating you is unfair. I’ve never gotten to take my girlfriend or my friends on tour before. I was so excited to be able to spend this time with everyone that I forgot I should be dividing it equally, not just expecting you to want to spend time with me and the guys all the time and not having alone time together.”

You sighed and moved closer to him, burying your head in his chest as you wrapped your arms around his waist.

“I want you to be happy while you tour,” you told him. “I just want to be able to spend time with you, too, and to make memories while we’re seeing the world together. I don’t mind if the guys tag along sometimes, but other times I do want it to just be us.”

“I know, babe. I promise from here on out I will spend equal time with you and with the guys, and I won’t leave you alone in arenas when we’re going out ever again. I’ll wait for you, even if that makes us the last two people in the building and they’re forcing us out so they can lock up.”

You giggled. “I won’t make you take it that far. That’s not fair to the custodians then.”

Shawn chuckled as well and kissed your forehead. The two of you got into bed together and you settled into Shawn’s arms. You were starting to feel the tug of sleep pulling you into the world of dreams when you felt Shawn’s lips against your forehead again.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too,” you mumbled back. “Go to sleep, I’m tired.”

His chest vibrated as he chuckled and you felt him stretch out towards the nearby light switch before the room was plunged into darkness and you finally drifted off to sleep.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes x reader #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

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violetsandfluff · 2 years

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I Wanna Love You With The Lights On (s.m.)

i’m just gonna pretend that i never found this picture. 😩

shawn mendes x female reader. word count: 3.9k, contains fluff and smut. this is one of my comfort videos and i want so bad to be in camila’s place-–— so i combined two concepts and here we are. enjoyyyyh <3 and also, shawn’s song

TW: smut, dominance, degradation, oral, almost getting walked in on, you know. SMUTTTTTT. It starts off so slow and boring, but stick with it pleaaasseee 🥺 annnnnnd I got lazy proofreading D:

The Met Gala.

Shawn and y/n had been anticipating this for so long. It was their first time going together, and that alone was exciting. Every day was a new adventure for them, and they wanted to experience it all together.

Several weeks before the gala, they had met with their stylists to talk about their attire for the day. Y/N was to wear an elegant dress composed of a smooth red fabric with a delicate sheen. It would be tightly fitted all the way down with a bare back and a slit cut into the left side to show your leg. The top would be covered in red sequins, and it would ride low on your chest, showing an ungodly amount of cleavage. The sleeves would barely cover the tops of your shoulders with a sheer red fabric. The dress would be paired with strappy heels and a pearl necklace reminiscent of the one your grandmother often wore. It was bold in the most classic way possible. It was the perfect thing to go with Shawn’s outfit.

He would be wearing a black leather jacket with nothing underneath to show off his solid chest and ripped abs. There would be a heavy necklace to add texture to his chest, and he would be wearing a pair of black pants and heavy black boots.

As soon as this was decided, Shawn and his girlfriend were absolutely hooked.

“Think of how sexy your chest will be,” Y/N breathed as she ran her hand along the comfortable firmness of his muscles. “It’s like a dream.”

“Think of how sexy you’ll look,” Shawn practically moaned as he imagined how nicely the dress would hug you. It almost made him drool. The Met Gala was going to be an unforgettable night, hands down.

The day of the Met Gala rolled around.

Shawn held Y/N’s hand as they walked into the building where they’d be getting ready. They were brought into interconnected rooms and the process of getting them ready began.

Y/N’s skin was cleansed deeply until it emitted a healthy glow, and her hair was shampooed so it shone.

“My skin feels so smooth,” she beamed as she ran a finger gently along her cheek.

“Smooth like a baby’s bottom,” Shawn called cheekily from the other room.

She could picture the lopsided grin on his face and how pink his cheeks were growing as he realized what he said.

Miranda, one of the three stylists working with her, couldn’t help but chuckle at his response.

“Guess he’s listening in,” Y/N mused quietly, to which she laughed merrily.

Shawn’s room was awfully quiet.

“Damn, these are the shoes you get to wear?” Ian, one of the other two stylists asked as he picked up one of your strappy heels. He was in charge of her outfit right now; performing minor adjustments and finishing touches.

“I’m gonna be so tall,” Y/N replied, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “Shawn Mendes has nothing on me.”

“We’re just going to ignore the fact that I’m taller than you,” Shawn contradicted from the other room. “I’m bigger, stronger, and tougher than your wildest dreams.”

His words were audacious, but his shaky voice was a clear indicator of nerves.

“Well, you’re my mildest dream,” she bantered absentmindedly. “You wouldn’t stand a chance against my nightmares. Now… don’t you have business to attend to?”

Ian let out a choke-laugh from his position across the room, his face crinkling up into a joyous expression. “Girl,” he commented. “Is he like that all the time?”

Y/N tried to shake her head, but she was greeted with an unexpected singe of heat on the back of her neck.

She made a sound similar to a cat hissing at the sensation, and the stylist working on her hair pulled back in horror.

“Oh my God. Y/N, I am so sorry. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” she replied as she fingered the tender area. “I can’t feel it anymore.”

“Good,” Claire, the stylist, replied. “It’s pretty visible, though.”

“She looks like she got a hickey!” Miranda squealed as she peered around Y/N’s neck. “Ohmygosh, so romantic!”

Claire’s lip curled up in disgust. “If Y/N wants to get a break from thirst dms, we’re gonna have to cover that with every fiber of our being. Ian? Can you go get some ice?”

“Just a little bit,” Miranda advised. “We don’t need a lot. You give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.”

Y/N gave a weak laugh and bit her lip. She was still a little uncomfortable with all of the attention. The concept was new to her. She had anticipated being in the same room as Shawn, and being able to talk to him without walls acting as barriers.

Oh well, she thought. Only a few more hours.

The last thought brought on a whole new wave of panic, but she assured herself that Shawn knew what he was doing.

This was his third Met Gala, after all. He was a professional!

“Things sure got quiet once Ian left,” Claire commented as she used her long acrylic nails to brush through Y/N’s half-styles hair. “Who wants to listen to some music?”

“Me!” Y/N was only too eager to agree. The constant chatter wasn’t comfortable, but neither was the silence!

“Do you have a good playlist?” Claire inquired as she played with Y/N’s curls, trying to find a way to cover the burn.

“I think so.” She unlocked her phone and scrolled through Spotify until she found her go-to playlist for good vibes.

By the time Ian returned, the girls were belting the songs out like they didn’t have a care in the world.

“Well,” he said hesitantly, “I got your ice. Anything else I can do for you?”

“So you can leave again?” Claire giggled. “Sure. Uh, I’ll take…”

She proceeded to rattle off an extensive order, most of which seemed contradictory or impromptu. She went on and on about how she didn’t want a sleeve on the cup, and how she wanted to substitute several ingredients until Ian interrupted with an exasperated squeak.

“Is that too much?” Claire inquired innocently.

“Girl, tell me, what the fuck is that?” Ian protested. “Let me take a voice recording of you so the poor baristas can hear how stupid you sound.”

“Relax,” Claire assured him. “I got that from a Karen subreddit. I don’t need anything.”

“Y/N, do you need anything?” Miranda asked sweetly, and you declined.

“No, but you should try rapping, Claire. That— that order—would make an excellent rap.”

“Eminem could never,” Miranda agreed.

As if on cue, Love the Way You Lie started playing from Y/N’s phone.

“And I’m Rihanna,” Ian rolled his eyes back into his head.

“I can rap,” Claire confessed. “Wanna hear?”

———

“That dress suits you so well!” Miranda exclaimed as she adjusted your airy sleeves. “Shawn’s going to have the best reaction ever.”

Y/N smiled nervously before she gulped. This was frankly nerve wracking.

———

In the other room, Shawn’s stylists were just getting done with him, too. They didn’t miss the nervous smile that was plastered on his face like a tattoo.

“I think you’re done here, Mr. Mendes. Why don’t you go see Y/N?”

He had done more than his fair share of dreaming about how hot she’d look in her dress, but no amount of imagination could have prepared him for what he saw.

He almost started laughing. It had to be a prank.

His jaw fell open as he stared at his girl, who wasn’t doing much to help.

“Ta-da,” she sang cutely, making jazz hands.

His jaw was practically on the floor. He turned his face away from her, pretending he had an itch on his neck. His cheeks were flaming red and he knew it. It couldn’t be helped.

“Ohh… fuck,” he said finally. Unable to make eye contact with her, he stood awkwardly, his hands raiding his pants to find pockets to thrust them into.

“You look amazing.”

A shy, boyish smile danced on his blushing face and Y/N looked at the ground also, touched by a hint of embarrassment.

“You look amazing, too, baby.”

These words nearly coaxed a moan from deep in his chest.

He knew that she was gorgeous, but the cherry red dress was doing things to him. He would look at her face, but the lipstick would probably make him equally hard.

He hoped desperately that he wouldn’t look too hard in his tight pants. He didn’t want anyone except Y/N, his princess, to see him so erect.

The pair stood in awkward silence as people bustled around them.

“We need to get you two in the car in ten minutes, so finish whatever you’re doing.”

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat, and Shawn’s head snapped up at the sound. “You’re gonna be okay,” he promised. “I’ll be right beside you the whole time.”

“Okay.” She smiled and leaned into his chest, rubbing her cheek along the bare muscle. “This shirt is incredibly hot on you.”

“What shirt?”

“No shirt!” she giggled. “It’s a joke.”

Shawn licked his lips and gulped nervously as he put his hands on her shoulders and turned her around so her back was to him. He guided her out the door and pushed her into the vehicle that was waiting for them.

It was black, shiny, and very long, and tall.

There were a handful of other people in there, various celebrities and their stylists.

Shawn and Y/N kept mostly to themselves, performing small tasks that made them smile.

“I forgot to put in my earrings, baby,” Shawn asked nervously. “Can you help me?”

She gave him a sweet smile as he handed her his tiny silver earrings.

She pushed them in and put the backs on before kissing each one gently.

“Can you fix my hair?” she requested.

A sly smirk spread across Shawn’s pink lips as he ran his fingers through the stylists’ work. “Bet that feels nice,” he commented.

“It does,” she breathed as her eyes fell shut. She opened her jaw to make it look like she was going to moan, but Shawn clamped it shut.

“That’s enough, baby girl.”

“I thought that’s what you wanted,” she feigned innocence as Shawn’s strong, veiny hand came to rest on her knee, on top of her cherry red dress. His ring-clad digits curled as he squeezed it and she let out a sound that was a cross between a hiccup and a whine.

Shawn lowered his face so it was right beside her ear and whispered, “be good.”

The words, though simple, made Y/N shiver with pleasure. A side effect to this horniness was a new sense of confidence.

Thank goodness no one aside from Shawn was paying attention to her, because she felt the need to tense her thighs a little tighter.

Once they arrived at the venue, it was absolute chaos. There were people shouting instructions at them from every direction. It was overwhelming in the best way possible.

There were cameras everywhere. Everyone in sight had a camera. The flashes were blinding, and Shawn’s hand was the only thing grounding her, but it was exhilarating.

“Loving the attention, hm?” Shawn asked discreetly as they began walking down the stairs.

She didn’t reply. It was much too hectic for her to be heard, anyway.

Once they reached the bottom, they posed for some pictures.

Shawn’s arms felt so warm and welcoming around Y/N’s anxious body. She hoped like crazy that no one could sense how nervous they were.

As soon as the pair was done, they were ushered into another room to get ready for the after party.

Shawn would be wearing the same outfit, but Y/N had a second one to change into. It was much less fussy than her previous dress, meaning she could slide it on and forget about it.

It was a deep, shiny midnight blue wrap skirt that fell loosely around her beautiful figure, ending a crude length above her knees. She kept on the same heels and accessories, but she let Claire and Miranda fix her hair into a simple but elegant updo.

When she emerged from the fitting room, Shawn didn’t look as shocked as he had before. He looked horny as fuck.

He had a guilty sort of smile dancing on his face as he opened his arms for her.

“Kiss me,” he whispered.

She craned her neck upward to reach his rosy lips with her own, giving them a firm peck. He would have to wait for more.

“Be patient,” she instructed as she ran a hand seductively down his chest. “Be a good boy.”

Shawn swallowed painfully and closed his eyes forcefully, trying to ward off the hardness that was overtaking his cock.

Y/N pretended not to notice.

The sky was completely black as they emerged from the building to get back in the van. They were headed to the after party.

Shawn had been most excited for this part, but now he just seemed impatient and aggravated. The “party” was the only thing that stood between him and his pretty girl’s glistening pussy, and sadly, it was an immovable barrier.

His hand crept slowly up her thigh as the car drove on, but he kept staring at his phone to make it seem like he wasn’t so focused on her. And because his hand was in her lap, he could feel when she clenched them tightly together.

She cursed herself mentally for having chosen such a short dress.

They could always duck out after a few minutes.

When the car pulled up to the massive mansion where the party was to be held, everyone inside spilled eagerly out.

Shawn and Y/N lingered by the door for a few awkward moments before entering.

They wanted to thrust their tongues deep into each others’ mouths, but someone was bound to find them there.

With nothing but an exchange of wary glances, they entered the bustling venue.

There were so many people and so many cameras flashing.

Y/N was constantly fiddling with her dress, making sure it was covering everything, and making sure her desperate thigh clench wasn’t obvious.

At one point, only ten minutes later, Shawn unfolded his hands from his lap discreetly to ask, “Do I look hard?”

Y/N bit her lip at the prominent outline that stood out through his pants. She nodded slowly, and they excused themselves to a quieter hallway.

The house was decorated with ornate artwork everywhere. It pained them both to think of how it would look by daybreak, but they seemed to have a bigger problem at hand.

“If we go into a bathroom, will anyone see us?” Y/N panicked.

“There’s a lot of people. I guess it’s a real possibility,” Shawn thought aloud. “But no one will miss us. There’s too many people here.”

“Right.”

Both of their hearts were hammering nervously, high on adrenaline.

They found an old, vacant restroom and closed the door carefully before grabbing each other’s faces and sharing a deep, passionate kiss.

Their stomachs were both enveloped in a feeling of warmth, completely full of love when they hadn’t even begun.

Y/N moaned from the sensation, and Shawn slipped his tongue back into her mouth, trying desperately not to moan too loud.

It didn’t matter how noisy the reception was. One never knew who lurked in the halls.

“Turn the lights off,” she suggested shakily.

“No way. Hold your dress out of the way,” Shawn murmured breathlessly as he squirmed free of the pants and underwear that bound him. His cock was fully erect, and he was about to fix that.

“Make it quick,” Y/N warned as she pulled her hair up into a bun at the back of her head.

Without warning, Shawn bent her over the counter and began fucking his fingers in and out of her aggressively from behind. He skipped his normal build up and thrust three in from the start.

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat as she moaned, holding onto the insides of the twin sinks on either side of her.

Once Shawn was pleased with the amount of arousal dripping from her lips, he began thrusting his cock into her.

“Pretty… little… cunt,” he growled with his eyes squeezed tightly shut. “Tight, pretty little hole, gonna stretch it out so much.”

“Shawn,” she moaned again as she squirmed around him.

“Hold still,” he commanded, but he was interrupted by a jarring sound coming from the door.

Someone was there.

The light, airy moans continued to drift from Y/N’s lips, too euphoric to suppress.

“Occupied!” Shawn called, trying to drown out the moans with his smooth voice. It must have worked, because the footsteps turned and retreated.

“That was close,” Shawn grimaced. “My baby almost got us walked in on.”

“What did I do—ahh,” she gasped as another thrust nearly threw her off balance.

“Moaning like a little slut,” he tutted, inhaling shakily as drove his shaft into her throbbing pussy before emitting an ungodly erotic moan of his own. He looked in the mirror just in time to see Y/N’s eyes open in surprise.

“God, Shawnie,” she whispered. “You must feel really good right now, huh?”

“Need to cum so, so bad,” he whined uncomfortably, bucking his hips behind her. He let go and came inside her, filling her with so much love that the excess leaked out.

“Cum, baby,” Shawn groaned, pulling out of Y/N so he could watch her as she came.

Shawn pulled his pants back up and helped his shaky Y/N pull her dress down to cover her butt again.

She watched as Shawn cleaned up the bit of mess left over, then the pair washed their hands and left the bathroom.

“Do we look suspicious?” Shawn worried.

“No. No one will even notice us. Let’s just… duck out quickly.”

They thought they had left unnoticed, but they were greeted by a party of paparazzi outside the doors.

They tried to act nonchalant as they made their way to the vehicle that would take them home, but it was hard. The memory of what had happened just minutes ago was nipping at the back of Shawn and Y/N’s minds.

Y/N smiled shyly at the attention while Shawn kept a straight face, pushing her into the car. As soon as the car began driving, Shawn began whispering slight, degrading words into your ears, loud enough for only you to hear.

“You loved that attention, hm?” he questioned brusquely.

You swallowed thickly, praying for him to move on, but he didn’t.

“I need an answer, baby. I can’t have you being such an attention whore when I can give you all the attention you need? Answer me.”

“I only want your attention.”

“You better not lie to me, princess,” he placed a hand on your knee, lowering his lips even closer to your ear. “I’ll give you all the attention you’ll ever need tonight. Just wait and see.”

You thanked the driver before getting out at your house, but then rushed through the night to the door. The first thing you saw when you walked in was a staircase, and Shawn didn’t hesitate to take advantage of it.

“Take off your dress, Lovie,” he instructed as he peeled his sweaty clothes from his body. “Wanna see every inch of that pretty body.”

You stripped naked and he couldn’t help coming over to you, his lips feathering the burn from earlier.

“Looks like a hickey,” he commented. “Gonna give you tons of these, too.”

Several teeth marks were set into your neck, coaxing pained moans from your lips.

“Shawn… owie.”

He looked you in the eye and gave a filthy smirk before sinking to his knees before you, his mouth opening as he went.

“Gonna make you so wet,” he vowed. “Wetter than ever.”

With that, he plunged his entire face into Y/N’s pussy, absolutely smothering himself in the arousal that was already beginning to form. His tongue lapped at her clit and he tore his lips from her just long enough to mumble, “A pretty rosebud, and it’s blooming just for me.”

“God, Shawn, fuck,” Y/N moaned dizzily as she stumbled against a wall, dragging Shawn by his tongue.

“You taste so good, darling,” Shawn commented as he continued to eat her out. “It makes me feel all warm and cozy inside. It makes my tummy feel nice and full.”

“Fuck, Shawn,” she said as her head rolled back.

He was using his tongue to reach places that even she couldn’t reach. “Stop talking like a baby. Use grownup words.”

Shawn ignored her, grinning lazily as he stood up. “Cum for me, rosebud. I wanna see how good I make you feel.”

She let go, falling into his arms as she came for a second time that evening.

“You’re so pretty when you make that face,” Shawn said lowly as he brushed his fingers across her sweaty forehead. “Looking all needy for me, yeah?”

“Y-yeah, baby. F-fuck.”

“Yeah?” he mocked. “Yeah, my baby wants me to fuck her?”

He gave her no warning before his hard cock was thrusting into her, fucking her at a turtle’s pace.

On his fourth thrust in, he bottomed out and couldn’t resist commenting on it.

“Oh, my tiny girl. I bet you can feel me so deep in your tummy.”

He went on fucking her in silence, accompanied only by her airy ahs and the wet slurping sounds she made as he went in and out of her.

“I’m gonna pick up the pace a little, love,” Shawn warned. “I’m almost ready for you to cum.”

“I’m ready now,” she whined.

“Wait,” he commanded dominantly, and she closed her mouth, letting the whimpers escape through her nose.

“There’s a good girl. I just want to show you something.”

He scooped her up effortlessly into his strong arms and carried her to the bathroom, where a tall, narrow mirror was propped up against the wall. He positioned her on the counter in front of it and spread her legs.

He knelt in front of the counter and used his tongue to lap at her messy pussy.

She watched in awe as she saw him from the mirror, entranced by his expertise.

“You fuck so well,” she said, voice trembling. “I need to cum again.”

“Let me use my fingers one last time and then you can cum,” Shawn promised, to which Y/N had no choice but to agree.

He pulled his face away from her and licked his lips seductively before putting two fingers into her. He pulled them in and out, curling them expertly until his good girl came without warning.

She whined her apologies as everything flowed out of her, but Shawn didn’t mind. He took the opportunity to put his shaft back into her one final time and fill her pussy again.

She watched in awe as he came, his reflection candid in the mirror.

Once he was done, he slumped down on the bathroom floor like a starfish and gave a sigh of resignation.

Y/N left from her mount on the counter to join him, resting her head on his chest and playing with his necklace in one hand.

“God, I love you,” he sighed as he felt the coolness of the tiles seep into his sweaty skin. “Bet I made you feel real good.”

“Yeah,” she breathed in awe.

“Let’s clean up tomorrow.” he suggested tiredly.

“Are we gonna go to bed?” Y/N asked, smothering her boyfriend’s chest with hot, open-mouthed kisses.

“You can go if you want,” Shawn said submissively, eyes shut for the night. “I’m not going to be able to feel my legs halfway up the stairs.”

Taglist: @butlersluvr @chocochipcookie305 @ @monikamendes @fishingirl12

#Shawn mendes #Shawn mendes fanfic #Shawn mendes imagine #Shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes x y/n #boyfriend!shawn #met gala 2021 #Shawn met gala #flutterfly alley #yellow 💛 heart

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thisbipuff-isaswiftie · 2 years

Note

Hi!!

I want to request a Shawn angst imagine, please.

Something about sylvie or someone from his team talking about the reader behind her/they back and she/they feeling angry and telling shawn but he didn't believe it and having a fight but then he heard them talking bad about the reader again and trying to apologize, you decide if the end.

Only if you're comfortable to do it, love the work! Keep going!

Thanks for the request, honey!!!!!

I'm sorry if this is not that good, but I really hope u like it~

_____

Big Deal | Shawn Mendes

Warning: Angst, fights, cursing.

Containing: boyfriend!Shawn, girlfriend!reader, Jerk!Shawn, Artist!Reader

pairing: You and shawn mendes

You loved Shawn so much. You have been his girlfriend for 19 months now and now as you remembered how you had met, you laughed hysterically. You met him at an art exhibition, where he came, disguised in a black hoodie, a cap, and a mask. You had run into him while staring at the paintings on the wall, and almost screamed when you saw him like that. At first, you thought he was a thief or something, and seeing you freak out, he thought you had recognized him. So he had quickly pulled you aside and made you calm down.

You remembered the way you were so confused when he said that you knew who he was and he begged you to not tell anybody. But seeing your confused face, he pulled down his mask-making your mouth shut and your eyes wide. Honestly, you weren't a big fan of him back at that time, you never liked pop so you never even knew him as such. But you had heard of him from your friends and knew very well just who he was and why he had pulled you aside. When you had figured out just what had happened and the misunderstanding, you laughed out loud. Too loud.

He had raised his eyebrows and stared at you as you held your stomach as you laughed, which you knew was a not-so-beautiful sight. "What? Are you those insane kinds?" He had asked to which you stopped laughing and shook your head, looking at him disapprovingly. He didn't have a right to call people insane or judge them like that. So you gave him a piece of your mind and left him staring at you like an antelope in headlights. When you were looking at a mind-blowing piece of painting, he stood beside you, his disguise intact. He had said something clever and cocky and then after a small pause, apologized to you. You smiled at his sweet apology and the small smile he had delivered you. You were suddenly feeling this weird feeling in your chest.

And well, that's when you started hanging out more. After two coffees, a walk to the library, and a guitar session he had finally kissed you and asked you out. You were so happy, and till now everything was going great.

Well now...

You were a bit concerned about Shawn. He had been a bit distant and had canceled your last three dates. You already knew the obstacles that were going to come along with dating a celebrity such as him. You knew he was busy with his album and he had been getting a lot of hate, and you understood that he needed space. But you just wanted him to know that you were there for him.

You were waiting for him at your home, watching another episode of B99, and drinking coffee. When you heard the door opening, your head quickly turned, and you got up, slowly walking towards the door. There he was, your Shawn, coming in hanging his keys and hanging his coat. He looked so exhausted.

You sighed and walked towards him, taking his face in your hands as a yawn came across his lips. He quickly shook it off as he felt your soft hands caressing his cheeks. "Oh hi." He said and gave you a lop-sided and a sleepy smile. "You're still awake?" He said, his brows scrunching. You chuckled softly and brought his face towards yours and gave him a peck. "I missed you," You said softly, "and I hadn't seen you in a few days."

"What?" He said, his voice laced with a bit of aggravation. "We just had breakfast yesterday, together." You sighed a bit and stepped away from me. "You know what I mean,"

"No I don't!"

"Well, a bite of toast, a kiss to my forehead, and telling me you're going to be late and getting out of the house in less than 30 seconds, when I made bacon and pancakes for you is not having breakfast together."

Shawn groaned and stormed off, making your blood boil. You breathed in sharply and walked after him, "What the hell Shawn!?" Shawn rolled his eyes and plopped down on your couch, a small smirk passing his face for a second when he heard the title track of B99 playing on the TV. "You can't just walk away like that!"

"Well, guess what? I did!"

Your teeth gritted and you gave him a murderous look. You didn't like how Shawn was behaving with you, this is not how he acted with you. And you hated it. Didn't he realize that he was hurting you? "You know what? Fuck you." You stormed off to your bedroom, and took his pillow and his quilt and threw it across the room in the hall. "HEY!" You slammed the bedroom door and groaned out loudly.

You did not plan your night to go this way.

You sat on the bed, looking at the light that came from the living room through the small space between the door and the floor.

You sighed, your chest thudding loudly. Hugging your knees close to your chest, and you let out a shuddering breath, as a tear fell from your eye. You shook your head at your ridiculousness, and wiped your tear. It was confusing to you why you were being so emotional over this fight. It seemed small, didn't it?

But it wasn't.

This wasn't how you wanted your fights to go, fights that would lead you both to drift apart, and eventually, your relationship would fall apart...

The thoughts made you feel that your heart was being pulled apart. You looked at the light that escaped the small gap. Why did your relationship suddenly feel like that? Darkness had surrounded you, and the escaped light was really close but too far away to engulf you into happiness again. That light was Shawn. And it was almost as if he had forgotten to engulf you. And it was slowly killing you.

Before you know it, sleep had consumed you, with those burning thoughts still fresh in your mind.

.....

"Hey, honey."

You hugged your coat over your chest and spared Shawn a glance. You had woken up to a cold and empty bed, disappointing you. You didn't think Shawn would stretch it till the morning. That was until you smelled the sweet scent of maple syrup and pancakes. Realizing Shawn's plan to lure you into forgiving him, you rolled your eyes. If he thought that pancakes was going to make you ease up, then he was miserably mistaken.

He knew that you never liked fights left like this, with so much tension in the air that it pressured your heart. He knew that you preferred to talk it out and apologize to each other, and not leave it just like that. You had sighed and got up, freshened up.

You heard Shawn sigh and groan slightly as you went through your mail. You saw one addressed to Shawn. You looked up, looking at the creases on Shawn's forehead. "You have mail." You said, monotonously. You walked towards him, and he looked at you hopefully.

But you didn't give in, not just yet. You were too angry at him but didn't want to give him attention. You still wanted to hit him and scream at him because of last night and what he made you feel. And yeah, you also wanted to get the argument over with and just hug him. But you didn't.

Shawn didn't know if he was right or if he was wrong. What he did was fully flawed, and he didn't realize it. You had always been a bit touchy. It was your way of receiving and giving love. Through physical touch. Unfortunately, it was one of your insecurities as well. You had been brushed off as annoying so many times because of your habits, it hurt you. So you had given Shawn a warning, no let me scratch that. So many warnings.

This fight wasn't exactly related to that, but it still made the insecurities and that same unsafe or lets say, not belonging feeling around you.

Shawn hadn't forgotten that, but he wasn't sure if it was exactly his fault. I mean, you did know how busy he gets. So after a busy day, he might want a bit space, didn't he?

But he didn't want this fight to last this long, either. He was keeping a party at their house, tomorrow night. He didn't want anybody to talk about your relationship or its problems. He didn't want anything new to stir up. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

You looked up, your expression was something he couldn't decipher.

"I'm sorry." He said, loud and clear. "It was wrong of me, what I did last night. And I know I have been bailing on you for a long time, and you have been so understanding. I'm sorry,"

You nodded at him. "Just don't do it again." You said, gently. Shawn didn't really understand why your voice sounded so afraid. It wasn't that big of a deal, was it?

"Anyway," Shawn smiled at you and brought up two plates of hot pancakes. "I'm keeping a party tomorrow night, if that's alright with you?" You smiled at him. "Yeah, no problem. Who's coming?"

"You know the usual, the team. Niall, Taylor etc. We wanted to celebrate all the work we've done for the new album."

"Ooh, when are you releasing it?"

"Next month. It's not completed it, but we're very proud of what it has become until now." You looked at him with a proud expression. You were so happy for him. You loved how hard-working he was.

"Okay then," You smiled at him. "You going to the studio, now?" He nodded, "I'll be back by 8. We can binge B99 if you want. Or maybe watch Avengers, since you're so fond of Tom Hiddleston," You giggled and blushed. "And RDJ." You pointed out, and he scoffed, smiling.

He kissed your forehead as you both finished your breakfast, and took your plates putting them in the dishwasher.

After getting ready, he went out the door, giving you your goodbyes and kisses. Still as he stepped out the door, you felt disappointment arousing in the pit of your stomach.

.....

You looked at yourself in the mirror and stared at your outfit. You smiled and adored the slight foxy eyeshadow you had done. You took a deep breath and stepped outside your bedroom door. The party music was roaring down, and you slowly stepped down the stairs. As you stepped onto the second last step, you tried to find Shawn, and spotted him having a drink with two of his friends from the team. You smiled at him as he stared at you. You walked towards him, and noticed him still staring at you. "What?" You asked. "Does this not look good?" You turned your waist, "Should I change?" But he just grinned at you, and pulled in for a kiss.

He left you breathless and smiled at you. "You look fucking stunning, honey."

You blushed under his gaze and hid your face in his chest as it rumbled because of his chuckles. "Such lovebirds." Someone muttered and you looked up to see Niall. "Niall!!" You squeaked and hugged him. "How are you?"

"Perfect, love." He said and smiled at how you had wrapped your hands around his waist. "How are you both?" He asked cheekily.

"Same." Shawn said and kissed your cheek.

"I'm glad."

You looked around and sighed at the crowd. As much as you were proud of Shawn and no matter how many launch parties you go to with him, you never get used to the crowd. It gets overwhelming and makes you anxious. That's why you never actually like coming to these parties yet you did, only for Shawn. You tried not to always stick to him, but always made sure that he was in your eye sight, to make you feel calm and safe.

If he wasn't, then you would look for Niall, Taylor, or one of the other people with whom you were really good friends.

But mostly, it was Shawn.

You were thirsty and wanted to get a drink, so you went to the bar, promising Shawn to meet him at the dance floor.

But when you came back, he wasn't there. You couldn't find him. You looked around the crowd but couldn't spot him. When you looked back at the bar, you saw him with one of his team members. You recognized her immediately. Sylvie.

She had helped Shawn a lot, and you appreciated her for that. But sometimes you felt that maybe she didn't really like you, you tried to tell Shawn but he dismissed you, saying that you're being paranoid and that you haven't just spent that much time.

You sighed as you walked over to him.

"Shawn!" He looked back and saw you. He smiled at you and waved you to come over. You walked towards him with relief on your face. You got close to him and wrapped your arm around his. "Sylvie! How are you?" You asked politely. She smiled grimly, not so excited to see you, and replied, "Great! We're just waiting for the album to be complete and released, aren't we?" She smiled at Shawn and rubbed his arm. You felt extremely uncomfortable as you saw he look at Shawn like that. Your insecurities got up. "I'm so proud of you guys!"

"Yeah, I'm sure you are." She mumbled and scoffed. "Did you say something?" You asked her but Shawn squeezed your hand. "Weren't we going to the dance floor? I'm sorry Sylvie, we'll see you later." He said and smiled at her. She nodded and he grabbed you and you both walked towards the dance floor. "That wasn't polite, Shawn."

"I know."

You both danced calmly into each other's arms. "Shawn, was it just me, or was she rolling her eyes at me?"

He mumbled something under his breath and then looked back at you. "No, sweetheart. She is just in a bad mood, her boyfriend and she got into a fight before coming here." You nodded. You looked up at him and sighed as you saw his beautiful brown eyes.

You sighed and kept your head on his chest as you both swayed from side to side to the soft rhythm of the music. "I love you." You whispered gently as comfort laced you both like a graceful ribbon. Shawn kissed your forehead, his lips lingering over the crown of your head. "I love you the most.." He breathed, as the scent of your hair reached him. His eyes fluttered shut and he pulled you even close, If that was possible.

You took deep breaths as you found yourself finally in your beloved's arms. It was rare. Very rare. And you wanted to make the most out of this moment. An unsettling feeling had rested in your chest, that any moment this is going to be ripped from you. He is going to be ripped apart from you. And you will be crushed again.

You entwined your hand into his' as the music ended and he was obliged to go and meet more guests. He gave you an apologetic smile, but you weren't going to leave him. You went along with him even if exhaustion had taken over your legs. You felt so much safer with him. His cheering voice always comforted you, it kept your anxiety at bay.

You both walked towards the bar again. You smiled at him and left his hand. You wanted to pee. So you stepped across but as soon as you closed your stall, some voices started speaking. Familiar voices.

"I mean did you see her tonight?"

"mhmm."

"Fuckin whore, can't even dress properly."

You tried to restrain your gasp as you recognized the voice. Sylvie.

"Poor Shawn, he must've had to deal with her."

"I know right? She's so useless. Always clinging to him like a puppy."

"She's only with him for clout. Clingy bitch."

"God, Shawn deserves so much better."

"Someone like you, Sylvie?"

"Oh shut up." She giggled. "Maybe."

Your blood boiled as you heard all those words, but your heart ached. Tears started to spill out of your eyes as you tried to keep your breath calm. Shawn deserves so much better. Was it true? Were you that clingy?

You heard the door close shut and that's when you broke down. Tears started to pour down your eyes, rolling down your cheeks. You held your forearms as your chest shuddered at thought of Shawn leaving you. You tried to keep your cries in but your ears started to hurt and your throat started to dry as you gasped for breath.

Your head was aching and your dress felt too tight now. Why was this happening to you? You wanted to yell for Shawn but then you thought about you being a burden to him.

And besides, you looked like a fucking disaster. You didn't want to ruin Shawn's rep like that.

.....

Shawn was a bit frustrated with you. You still doubted Sylvie, and it bothered him. She was such a sweet person and a great colleague. Why did you always seem to dislike her? It always annoyed him- you trying to point out some imaginary things about her. Sylvie was rolling her eyes at me; she was giving me a weird look; I think she doesn't like me; Your complaints were endless.

Niall furrowed his eyebrows at the crowd, and then looked back towards Shawn. "Shawn?" Shawn stirred his drink. "Yeah?"

"Where's Y/n?"

"Bathroom. Why?"

"Don't you think its been a long time?"

"Um-"

"Shawn you know what happens during these parties don't you?"

"Yes but-"

"Shawn go check on her or I will burst into the girl's washroom and sing Stitches."

"Ok, ok! Fine." Shawn breathed and looked around the crowd again. He breathed when he realized it had been a long time since you came. He got up and walked through the crowd, just to make sure that you weren't locked in the crowd. But you were nowhere to be seen. Shawn's heart rate started to increase. He was marching up to the ladies washroom.

Just as he went forward, trying not to bump into more drunk people- Shawn halted as a person came right in front of him. "Hi, Shawn~" He looked down to see Sylvie standing with a drink in her hand, a giddy expression on her face. "How are you?" She asked in a squeaky voice. She caressed his shoulder, going to his bicep. But Shawn was in a hurry to even process what she was doing.

"Sylvie-"

"Oh, I love it when you say my name." She said, breathily. Shawn gave her a weird look and then looked at the washrooms, they seemed so far away. "Sylvie, I have to go-"

"No please wait-" She held onto his hand. But Shawn twisted his hand out of her grasp and ran out of there. He burst into the washroom and heard small gasps and soft sobs. Shawn's heart broke; He took quick steps toward the stall and knocked. He heard a sharp gasp-- "Y/n? Honey?"

"Hello?" You squeaked out, keeping a small hope that it wasn't Shawn. "Sweetie, please open the door. For me?" You sighed and your breath shuddered. It was undoubtedly him. This was perfect- you felt even worse. You couldn't hide and you didn't have a mirror to fix yourself.

You wanted to dig a hole and die.

But you didn't have a choice now. Shawn looked up as the door clicked and you stepped out. Shawn cupped your face and studied it- you were an absolute mess.

"Shawn-"

Shawn shushed you and wiped the tears on your cheeks and kissed the red skin right under your eyes. You shivered as his cold lips touched your cheeks, and you closed your eyes as he pulled away.

"Why were you crying?" He asked directly. And you looked at the ground- You really didn't want to tell him, and lying wasn't an option because he could tell your tell on your fourth date. "Um,

I was in the stall- when some girls came into the bathroom. They started to talk- and um," You looked around uncomfortably. "I realized it was Sylvie and her friends. They said some things about me."

Shawn raised his eyebrows, "oh? What kind of things?"

"She called me a whore, and said that I was a clingy bitch and never left your side. She said that you must be," you took a deep breath. "Miserable with me." Shawn ran his hands through his hair. He couldn't believe that Sylvie would say this.

He couldn't believe that you were making these accusations.

"Are you sure it was her?" He asked. You furrowed your eyebrows. "Of course, I recognized her voice."

"But you didn't see her, did you?"

"Shawn-"

"No! Why did you always try to convince me that Sylvie hates you?"

You were completely taken back. How could he ask you this?

"You always try to tell me how bad she is-"

"I never told you that!" You shouted.

"But weren't you trying to? Weren't you? Why do you dislike her? She is one of the sweetest people I have ever met- can't you at least try to like her? At least to support me! I mean you have been nothing but unsupportive recently!" He spat at you. Your blood boiled as you heard his words. Unsupportive? "And that you bring Sylvie into all of this? God, y/n."

"Unsupportive?" You breathed. "Did you just call me unsupportive? How could you- I've always been supportive of you! I never complained when you come home so late and never texted me- I never got angry at you when you would ignore me- I always supported you through your tantrums-"

"What the fuck do you mean??"

"I'm your fucking girlfriend Shawn! I'm not your punching bag or your booty call! That whenever you want me I'll be there for you~ But it's not the way around. I always understand that your career can't always make you available, but I can't always be like this! I can't take it anymore!"

"And the fact that you don't believe me and don't fucking trust me is just-"

"God, you're such an ordinary girl," he mumbled under his breath. You looked at him, betrayal laced in your eyes. "I'm sorry, what did you say?" You asked him quietly. "You're such an ordinary girl!"

You were taken aback by his statement. An ordinary girl?

But you stayed quiet, that was your harshest answer. You were exhausted. You were tired by his actions, his expectations, and what you have faced. You couldn't do it anymore.

"If you can't handle this ordinary girl, then maybe you shouldn't be with her." You said with unshed tears in your eyes. "Maybe you should be with someone like Sylvie."

"It will be easy. She wants to be with you anyway." You said.

"What the fuck do you mean?"

You just shook your head and got out of there.

.....

Shawn was aggravated, how could you accuse Sylvie of saying such things? Shawn stormed off from the washroom after you did. His head wasn't straight at the time. Anger and frustration was running through his veins like poison. And what did you mean by that last thing you said?

"She wants to be with you anyway."

Alcohol was affecting his mind as the echo of your words ran through his ears. His head was getting dizzy. Shawn looked at the crowd and didn't find you. He panicked for awhile then remembered that you must've gone back home. Shawn wanted to ease off tonight, he had been working hard week after week. So many sleepless nights without you in his arms and he missed you so much.

But all of those sleepless nights had caught up on him and he just wanted to rest when he came back home. He didn't expect to get into that fight with you- and all that anger just wanted to be vented off.

So well, maybe Shawn realized that he had acted a bit inconsiderate.

And maybe cruel.

But she would forgive him wouldn't she?

Shawn somehow got engulfed in the crowd and was getting bumped constantly by the dancing cluster of people. He heard weird voices and someone very familiar trying to talk to him. "Shawn, buddy? Where is y/n? Are you okay?"

Shawn dismissed them and tried dancing off. Suddenly, he got pulled by someone and they started dancing with him. "Hey, Shawn." He heard someone say flirtatiously. He felt his cheeks being caressed. "Sylvie?"

"Hi silly, come on dance with me!" She said and took Shawn's hands and placed it them on her waist. "What are you doing?" Shawn asked, drunkenly. "Dancing with you, sweetie." She whispered in his ear. Shawn felt disgusted but he couldn't tell her that. He didn't want to dance with her, he wanted to dance with you. "Wait, Sylvie- I need to find y/n."

But she kept a hold on his hands. "Why? I'm here, aren't I? Anyway she left you alone." She said bitterly. "What do you mean? We just had a fight- and she said some bizarre things."

"She thought that you wanted to be with me! That's so absurd. You don't like me do you?"

Sylvie stayed silent which made Shawn panic. "Sylvi-"

She pulled him closer and whispered against his lips. "What if I do?"

Suddenly Shawn's new song started playing. It was supposed to be a surprise for you.

i wonder if you're real

Do i speak the truth or do i filter how i feel?

I wonder, wouldn't it be nice

To live inside a world that isn't black and white?

Shawn felt Sylvie's cold lips against the corner of his mouth and his whole body filled with disgust and shame. It felt wrong. It felt so wrong.

He wrote this song for you, he wanted to dance on this song with you. But you weren't here and it was all his fault. He hated himself because these words were written for you, were supposed be adored by you right now. Yet they were getting betrayed.

His heart shattered as he realized what was happening. His mind sobered up and he pushed Sylvie away with utter horror. He ran away to find you. Hoping you were home.

You weren't though.

You were walking down the quiet streets, getting drenched in rain. Tears were pouring down your face. You were so thankful that because of the rain nobody could distinguish whether the drops of water on your face were either raindrops or salty tears.

In the middle of this rain, that once you would've called so beautiful, your heart had been crushed and now fear had built. Was this the end? Were you and Shawn over?

You didn't want to think of that. But how could you not? He had totally disregarded you, over and over again. And you realized that a half-assed apology wouldn't work this time. You loved him so much.

Oh, you loved him dearly, but you had dignity and self-respect. And you were not going to let Shawn's cruel actions and your love for him to get between your self-dignity.

You sat down on one of the benches. Your sobbing wasn't stopping and you had given up now. You looked up and glanced around- The streetlights were lit, rain was dancing on the ground, and everything else was quiet.

You would've loved this. It would've been so romantic- but right now you felt empty.

Suddenly, you heard panting. Your eyes widened and you tried not to be frantic. What was it? A wild dog? "Thank god, I couldn't find you anywhere."

Your throat tightened. Shawn.

"That was the motive, Shawn." You said coldly. You didn't want to look at him. So you didn't realize that even he was crying.

"Please look at me, baby."

"What do you want?"

"You, back. Please." You stayed silent. "Love, I- When you left I got drunker and Sylvie danced with me. She-She tried to kiss me-"

Your eyes filled with tears once again. "I- You were right, baby. When she tried to kiss me, my song started to play. A new song, that I wrote for you- I didn't realize that I was hurting you and then I realized that I couldn't lose you. Those words, that-that music was composed for you, and all I wanted was you there, to be with me, in my arms to dance to that song. You're all I ever wanted, a-and I'm so sorry that I have been a total jerk to you, and I understand that you have been so patient with me and I have been taking you for granted."

"Glad you realized that."

"I'm so sorry, honey. Please give me another chance."

You stayed quiet. What he said melted your heart but you were stronger than that. You took in a deep breath albeit shaky. Restraining yourself from crying you got up, your knees weak. "Shawn, I-"

"I cannot forgive you." And because of the silence, both of your hearts shattering were audibly clear. "Just yet."

"I need time, Shawn. What you did- You didn't trust me! Your own girlfriend. I cannot forgive you just yet, and neither can I make myself trust you again. Not just like that. If you expected me to come back into your arms instantly then you were mistaken, Shawn." You said softly.

"I need time to think. And its better for now if you don't contact me for a few days." You slowly turned around. "It's best if you go back. Please take care of yourself." You said and walked away with a heavy heart.

Shawn watched as you walked away. He knew the damage he had done. He loved you so much, and he wasn't strong enough to pay the price. To stay away from you.

But he had to.

__________________________________

Thanks to-

@academiaghosts

who wanted to be tagged in every one of my fics!

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