#she found him at his lowest point. LITERALLY his defining moment. the moment he NAMED HIMSELF after.

[francesderwent]

can’t stop thinking about Mae and Valien

[redorich]

Out of This World

Niki watches despairingly as her new roommate, one Mr. Wilbur Soot, once again pours water into his cereal. He seems to prefer it that way; Niki can’t help but wonder, not for the first time, whether her roommate is a literal alien from outer space, or just the weirdest motherfucker she’s ever met.

What kind of a last name is Soot, anyway? She thinks to herself unkindly. At least he doesn’t leave dirty clothes on the floor for her to clean up like her last roommate did. But seriously, Niki can’t tell if this man is a crackhead or not.

“Niki, can you pass the salt?” Wilbur says, breaking her out of her reverie. Without thinking, she plucks it from the lowest shelf of the tiny kitchen cabinet and hands it to him. She regrets it instantly when he begins to salt his cereal.

Breathing deeply so as not to grab him by his bony shoulders and shout, “What the fuck is wrong with you?!”, she flees the scene of the food crime. When Niki was in college, she was surrounded by people who asserted they had the world figured out. Atoms and gravity and wavelengths. But Niki knows that humanity is desperate to control the uncontrollable, define that which cannot be explained. Science, Niki knows, isn’t just throwing out what doesn’t fit, but rather taking all the data and asking the question, “Why?” So, she thinks, let’s consider the data. 

-------

Niki sneaks trepidatiously to the door to Wilbur’s bedroom. Who knows what sort of unholy, confusing mess he’s got in there, lurking in wait for its next unsuspecting victim. A pinch of guilt hits her. Yeah, Wilbur may be a lunatic, but an alien? Really? It’s a bit uncharitable of her to think such a thing. Shaking herself, she knocks on the door.

“Yes?” Wilbur’s voice carries from inside the room. “Come in.”

Steeling herself, she turns the doorknob with a sweaty palm and is faced with…

A bed. A desk with a computer on it. Two pairs of shoes lined neatly near the closet. Wilbur is taking off his headphones-- he was playing Minecraft. How… ordinary of him.

“Hi, Wilbur. Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted, uh, to see how you were settling in.”

Wilbur smiles his pretty smile. “Thank you. Quite unaccustomed am I to the comforts of-- apartments.”

What Yoda-ass kind of phrasing is that? Niki thinks. A figurine of the marshmallow man from Ghostbusters stares her down from its place on Wilbur’s desk. She meets its eyes warily.

“Oh! Noticed my Ghostbusters statuette, have you?” Wilbur says brightly. “I have more in my closet, if you should like to see them.”

Niki is filled with a sick sense of curiosity. Yes, she wants to see whatever insane thing Wilbur hides in his closet, but she also doesn’t. She idly wonders if Wilbur has ever read The Cask of Amontillado. She feels like he has. This is not comforting.

Wilbur doesn’t sense her hesitation. A small corner of her brain thinks it’s because he’s unfamiliar with human body language. Without pause, Wilbur opens the closet door, revealing…

Niki’s first thought is, where does he keep his clothes? Because the closet is filled with Ghostbusters paraphernalia. The entire. Fucking. Closet. It wasn’t even that great of a movie?? How much did Wilbur spend on this, anyway?

Her roommate misinterprets her blank uncomprehending stare as a marveling gaze. He puffs up proudly.

“Such a profound impact have these movies made! I am truly fortunate to have met a lass of such upstanding artistic caliber, that you should also enjoy the Ghostbusters franchise.”

“Thank you for showing me this,” she says slowly. “I need to-- water the dog. I mean, I left the stove on. At my friend’s house. Uh, see you later.”

She beats a hasty retreat, leaving her apartment for Eret’s place. Something whispers in the depths of her mind: Doesn’t one of the Ghostbusters movies have aliens in it?

-------

Orange is her favorite nail polish color. Eret paints the nails on her right hand in that soft warm shade of orange as he listens to her complain.

“Am I being irrational? Like, do you think I’m going too far?” 

Eret hums noncommittally, putting a little flamingo sticker on her index nail. “He does sound like an unusual person, but I don’t know if I would say he’s an alien.” 

Niki nods her head, since she can’t gesture with her hands. “Okay, yeah, sure-- but he puts salt in his cereal with water. He has a literal dragon’s hoard of memorabilia from shitty movies that came out like three decades ago. And his vibe is just...off. Like when I talk to him, he’s there, but his head’s drifting off somewhere in outer space. God, I’m the worst.”

Eret protests. “Hey, hey, you’re not the worst. Look. I don’t know why this dude is bugging you out so much, but you said he didn’t seem dangerous, right?”

Niki nods dejectedly.

“So, we can figure this out together,” Eret says with a flourish, screwing the top back onto the bottle of polish.

The tender moment is interrupted by Niki’s ringtone. It’s from Wilbur; speak of the devil and he shall appear. Gingerly, so as not to ruin the wet paint on her nails, she picks up the phone and puts it on speaker. “Hello?” she says, motioning for Eret to remain quiet.

“Ahoy, Niki! Wherefore are mine frog legs gone?”

“What?” Eret mouths at her. Niki doesn’t understand either.

“Sorry, Wilbur, what was that?”

“My frog legs,” comes the crackly timbre of a phone in an area with poor reception. “They are no longer in the refrigerator.”

Niki sputters. “Why did you have frog legs in the-- no, never mind. I don’t know what happened to your frog legs, Wilbur.”

The phone line repeats static to her for a moment as Wilbur pauses. “Interesting. Perhaps they walked away, as legs are so oft wont to do. Niki, would you mind dearly to purchase some more? And perhaps, be you willing, some condensed milk?”

Eret silently gags at the idea of frog legs and condensed milk together. Niki doesn’t blame him.

“Okay,” Niki says. 

Eret shakes his head at her, as though begging her not to torture herself like this. The moment Niki hangs up, the first words out of Eret’s mouth are, “That man is one hundred percent an alien. I am so sorry I ever doubted you.”

-------

With frog legs, condensed milk, and an Eret in tow, Niki enters her apartment the following morning with new-found assurance. The rest of the evening goes about as normal as it can, with Wilbur humming nursery rhymes and stirring a pot of, quite frankly, poison. Niki and Eret hide in the living room watching all the Ghibli movies until the only light left comes from the TV in front of them. The front door opens and the floors creak as Will enters. I thought he was in his room?

Eret seems to be on the same page as her. “I didn’t hear him leave,” he says, distant fear in his eyes.

Niki’s ears pick up a faint sound. “Shh!” she hisses. “He’s on the phone.”

Though the apartment is dark (the only light being the TV), Wilbur’s eyes glow like an animal caught on camera. Niki shivers. She only barely catches a glimpse before he ducks back into the entrance hallway, but what she sees unnerves her.

“Philza, calm down,” Wilbur says from the hallway as he takes off his shoes. “It is fine, she suspects not.” 

A pause. The other person on the line, Philza, is talking. 

Wilbur replies, “She was impressed with my Ghostbusters collection, you know-- Ghostbusters is a great movie, fuck off!”

Another pause. Wilbur sighs.

“Aye, I must admit you may have been right on that one. Pretending to be human is--”

“I FUCKING KNEW IT!”

Wilbur’s head peers around the hallway’s corner in a panic to see Niki and Eret. Niki is pointing her finger at Wilbur with pride on her face, and Eret looks as though he wants to be doing the same thing.

The two in the living room both flush a bit at the outburst, but Niki doggedly continues. “You’re an alien!”

Even though Wilbur’s phone isn’t on speaker, Niki and Eret hear Philza’s laughter from all the way across the room. Wilbur sputters and angrily hangs up the phone, before turning the corner to properly face the two humans. His eyes are actually glowing, it wasn’t a trick of the light, Eret observes. Of course, he also notes that Wilbur’s eyes are the size of dinner plates, and he looks about ready to jump out the window to run from them.

“I am… not an alien,” Wilbur says softly.

“Wh-- but you just said--” Eret says, then cuts himself off when Wilbur phases through the fucking floor.

“He’s a ghost,” Niki whispers, all the pieces clicking into place. Old English, weird taste in food, Ghostbusters are you kidding me. If Niki didn’t just watch her roommate evaporate, she’d be banging her head against a wall and asking her professors to revoke her degree.

Wilbur phases back up through the floor, much closer this time but still hesitant. He sits down a few feet away from the pair of humans nervously. He’s more afraid of us than we are of him, Niki thinks. Like the bears at the zoo.

“For many years, observed the living have I,” Wilbur begins slowly. “I wished to commune with them once again, as one of their own. My father-- Philza-- said unto me that I knew nothing of the modern era. I confess that he was right. Willst you cast me out of your home, knowing now of the spectre that I am?”

Niki tries and fails to suppress the amused quirk of her eyebrow. “How about this: Eret and I show you the ropes of being alive in the 21st century, and in return, you keep the frog legs on your side of the fridge?”

Wilbur smiles that pretty smile again. “Deal.”

-------

“Niki? What is an OnlyFans?”

FIN

[abbybubbls]

A Character Study of Actor Mark (and others)

This is something I’ve had in my mind for quite a while. Since everybody’s going on a late Actor Mark craze lately, I’ve noticed that some people have been forgetting that Actor Mark is... well... an asshole. I won’t name any names, just know that I have no ill will towards people who view him differently, they can do whatever they want with their favorite characters, I just wanna go on a bit of a tangent, so... here we go.

Also, you’re gonna have to create a “flaw” counter because I use the word a LOT here.

Let’s get this out of the way; Actor Mark is flawed. Seriously flawed. He’s egotistical, he’s selfish, he only cares about notoriety, he’s a megalomaniac at best. And some people would assume that the Actor has been innocent before the Mansion messed him up after Celine left him, but... not really.

The Mansion pointed out the Actor’s flaws for a long time, and made those flaws more apparent when he was at his highest and lowest points in his life, making him more of an asshole within these moments. It wasn’t towards JUST the Actor though. It’d be towards William (eccentric, being too much of a hopeless romantic), Celine (using people, overprotective, short temper) and yes, even our innocent angel baby Damien himself (confusion, mostly). Almost every character in this series has flaws, but of course, the Actor is most apparent, even when we don’t see him that much.

Then again, the Actor is that kind of character you can guess what he’s like RIGHT when you look at him at first glance. Rich, has a big ego, arrogant, keeps secrets, etc.

I mean... the Actor was ALWAYS like this, it’s just that it’s more pointed out and apparent when there are defining moments in his life. He’s an asshole!

I’m not saying that the Actor is an asshole ALL the time, though. I’m pretty sure he’s had his moments of doing good, but... not a whole lot has been seen of him doing any good at all. We only hear that he’s helped Damien become a mayor, he gave up everything (maybe a bit too much) for Celine when they were married, “reaching out” to William while hiding his spite... and that’s really it. I mean... he gave Abe a job, too... I guess... 4 good deeds the Actor has done! Yaaaayyy...?

Anyway, what I’m getting at is that Mark (not Actor Mark, our boy the man of the hour Mark Fischbach himself) said that he doesn’t believe in 100% good flawless people. Almost every character he’s played and created have things wrong with them.

Let’s use our boy Wilford Warfstache as an example.

Wilford is playful, colorful, excited, curious, and is in constant need of looking for adventure and fun. But he is also very trigger-happy, easily distracted, violent, VERY forgetful, he selfishly runs away from his responsibilities (hence him blowing “BUBBLES!” in the GIF above), and he’s so traumatized and out of touch with reality that he just makes his own as he goes with no worries whatsoever.

Now, Wilford has been my most favorite Ego for a LONG time, and as much as I love portraying him as a cute soft playful idiot, I never forget that he does have a lot of things wrong with him, so I don’t make him too innocent and naive. He’s too far gone to even try and turn back to the way he was, and I absolutely LOVE that concept, and I think it fits very well with somebody like Wilford. His backstory and his problems and are what make me love him so much because he’s such a fun but complex character.

There is a degree as to how many problems that the character has and to see if that character really is a good person or not. There is always this middle ground between the black and white, there’s the morally gray area. You can create a grid of white, gray, and black, and list every Ego with ALL of the flaws that each of them have, and you can put them in whatever area depending on which one has the most problems. And of course, Actor Mark has a lot of them.

The Actor does have every right to be upset that Celine left him for William, but never to the point where he wants revenge on them. The Actor is too prideful and so up his own ass that the Mansion made his flaws more apparent than ever for YEARS, and he’s so spiteful and CONVINCED that he deserves to be more happy than anybody else that (justifiably?) did him wrong.

This is when some people assume that the Actor is the victim, and I don’t agree with them at all, but I can see where they’re coming from. The Actor became depressed that Celine left him, he was all by himself in the Mansion losing his mind, and he can be a very sympathetic character. And yes, when you look through his perspective, you can see why he’s so upset to the point of taking revenge on William for “stealing” Celine away from him, when really Celine probably had every right to leave the Actor for William anyway. She did say that she was never comfortable in the Mansion, and she was probably used by the Actor just for attention.

I’m not saying that it was a great decision for Celine to leave without saying anything. I mean, she could have just said she wanted a divorce because she felt uncomfortable with her surroundings and liked William much more, and if the Actor wouldn’t be so spiteful, he’d let her go. But of course, that doesn’t happen, so all my hopes and dreams for a nicer ending are crushed (I’m just kidding, I ADORE the ending we’ve gotten).

Where was I? Oh yeah, people thinking that the Actor is the victim... The more that I think about it... he’s really not. He brought it upon himself to be spiteful and brought misery to his friends instead of trying to move on from it. Sure, he doesn’t have to forgive them, but he should have at least tried to move on.

There is this VERY important statement that Mark has mentioned during his DAMIEN Explanation stream that most people seem to forget: The Actor never apologized for his actions once.

Let’s go back to our boy Warfy for a sec.

In Wilford ‘MOTHERLOVING’ Warfstache, even though Wilford may not remember a whole lot of Abe, he knows that he might have done something wrong to him, and apologizes wholeheartedly (with a squeak hug and everything)! He admits that he’s done some bad things even though he doesn’t remember them, or even know that he’s done them at all. He apologizes and is willing to move on from his previous mistakes, though of course he might know he’ll make more down the road.

In DAMIEN, the Actor is so far up his own ass that he doesn’t think all the horrible things he’s done to Damien, Celine, and Will are even that horrible. He’s thinking that his actions are somehow justifiable because of his tragic backstory, thinking he’s the hero. “My humble upbringing, my tragic backstory... There’s no other role for me to play!”

The Actor SAYS he’s come to Damien to apologize, but he doesn’t say sorry once. He never says “I’m sorry for what you had to go through” or “Yeah I might have gone a bit too far with you” or anything that would even remotely count as an apology. He only says “Things weren’t according to plan, some mistakes were made, it was supposed to go like this but then I found another way around it”.

He’s more focused on his own plan more than what happened to his friends DURING the plan. The Actor is SO convinced that he is the hero of his story that he NEVER admits that he is in the wrong of what he’s done to Damien and Celine, but he says he’s willing to move on from the past... when he’s really not.

He loses his temper very quickly whenever he mentions the past and he keeps snapping at Damien. When he “casts” Damien as the main villain of his story (even though Damien has done absolutely NOTHING against him besides not agreeing that he was good enough for Celine), Damien refuses and wants to live in peace, and then the Actor gets pissed off more, practically forcing Damien into the role of a villain.

You know who admitted that they’re wrong?

A LOT of people have had mixed feelings about Celine ever since her debut. Even I wasn’t so sure if I liked her when I first saw her. Nothing like some decent writing and character development can’t fix!

Mark has stated that in Who Killed Markiplier?, Celine had no real clear motivation than just “controlling people” and “doing seer things”, so he wanted to do more with her in DAMIEN.

Here’s some stuff we now know more about Celine;

1. She is overprotective towards Damien, and wants him to be safe within the body they both are forced to share.

2. She is Damien’s twin sister (ten minutes older)!

3. She REALLY wants the Actor dead after what he’s done to her and Damien.

4. She is a badass queen and has GREAT aim with her ax.

5. Her survival skills are to the max.

6. Her kickassery cannot be contained.

7. She has used people to protect herself and her brother... and admits it.

I am not saying that manipulation is a good thing, I myself am very gullible and I don’t like being used just to feel idiotic in the end. But of course, when you look into Celine’s perspective, you can see that she has controlled people for a very good reason, even though Damien is literally the same age as her and can take care of himself... but she wants to keep him safe anyway. Celine admits this in her lowest point, Damien lets her sleep after all that she’s done for him.

Here is the way I see it; If you don’t honestly and truly admit that you are in the wrong and don’t take responsibility for your actions, then you are not ready to move on from your past mistakes.

Just like everybody, we all make mistakes, and it’s our responsibility to make sure we can evolve from these mistakes instead of ignoring them or focusing too much on them at the same time.

Wilford is ignoring his mistakes entirely, but he still apologizes anyway without taking full responsibility for his actions and lets somebody else do it for him.

Celine does a good mix of both ignoring and focusing a lot on her mistakes, admitting that she is wrong and tries to take responsibility for it by letting Damien take the wheel.

Actor Mark, as well as Wilford, is ignoring his mistakes like mad, but doesn’t apologize at all.

And this is why I love the Actor as a character. I know, right? I’ve talked in SO MUCH detail about how and why the Actor is a horrible person and I just said I love him as a character! Well, much like Wilford, I have a strong adoration for characters that are ridiculously flawed, and we go deep into their pasts to find out why they’re the way they are.

Actor Mark really is the embodiment of a vengeful tragedy, and his entire character is so complex and interesting to look into...

and now people are treating him like an uwu soft angel boy, but this trend is gonna end soon, I’m sure. Not the love of the Actor, but the uwu soft angel boy part of the trend because... he’s not that at all.

Anyway, Actor Mark is not the hero, he’s an irredeemable douche bag, and I love him anyway. Let me know if there’s any more details about him that I’ve missed!

Buh-bye~

- Abby

[noxus-the-venomous-blog]

Part 2.02 KICK THE WORLD FACE

"YOU MOCK MY LAIR?!" Noxus grabbed the man by the collar. "You dare come into my place of dwelling with lll words?!"

"We're really doing this?" Big problem asked with a sigh as he watched his smaller friend building up steam to torment the man in his clutches.

"I will reach inside of your meager brain."

"Yeah now I know we're definitely doing this." BP sat down, awaiting a long monologue.

"And when I'm finish twisting and turning every spark in your meager mentality…"

"Oh come on this is often the funnest part of the day!" Tranquill said to big problem, poking him in his gorilla like shoulders.

"...and when all that's left of your brain is the shallow pleadings of a child's mind you will kiss my boot and beg for me to end your life."

"Dude I'm not even the one who gets to keep the rent money I just collect it. The management decides the when the inspection happens! They only pay me like 50 bucks a month," the young man grumbled, held tight in the rubber fists of Noxious.

“Is it worth your life?” “Fine dude we can do the inspection next week. You need to be on medication bruv,” he remarked as noxious loosened his grip on him.

“The whole world needs to be on medication…” Noxious said slowly as the man walked away. He then turned around to face his audience who was already snickering at him “That was Jeff, the supers assistant. Good kid. So let's get down to business”

“To COMPLETE! The PUN!” Tranquill shouted, smiling widely. Her joke found no success however, in a crowd where one was too old for reference and the other was too uncultured.

“Is this really the place to talk… Private? Like that dude weird girl across the road has been sitting there filming you for the past twenty minutes.” BP pointed across to the set of parallel storage containers on the other side of the lot.

“That's um…. That's my PR TEAM! FOR FILMING PROPAGANDA!”

“YO BIG GUY TAKE OFF YO PANTS!” the woman yelled.

Big Problem shot her a puzzled look. “Lets go to my place Nox. This place smells like raccoons and sadness.”

“You have a place?” Tranquill asked as she grabbed her coat.

“Yeah of course. Do you guys think i only exist in the world to help ya then when i'm done i teleport to another dimension and sit around waiting for you to need help again??” “That would be very useful” Noxious replied.

“SHAZAM!” Tranquill added.

“Well that's not my power. Although i met a guy like that, nice dude, gay as a rainbow on a unicorns butt, now can we go to my place?”

“That's homophobic” Tranquill accused.

“Im quoting the guy, besides i'm a villain, social standards are the laws i’m LEAST worried about breaking.”

“We shall ride to your lair and resume our business there,” decided Noxious, “Um…. we need a ride though.”

“Heh… I'll bring the truck around but you’re going to be a little cramped.”

The truck putted down an empty highway, bellowing black smoke out from its aged, rusted exhaust. It slipped and stumbled in momentum each time Big Problem had to jam the clutch down and shift. The old metal shifter smacking into Noxious’ leg every time the lowest or highest gear was used. Tranquil, leaned in on Noxious’ shoulders affectionately, squishing him closer to BP who already took up most of the truck.

“Ok so we can start talking now. I need to know how seriously you two take this. How focused are you?”

“I take it very seriously,” Tranquill said.

“Well now you do,” Noxious contradicted.

“Well ok sure for the first few months i was pretty sure we were larping but im totally caught up now. I share his passions for this world and this work. I agree with every word of his personal diary.”

BP raised an eyebrow. “You guys share your diaries?”

“Define shaRE-” Noxious was cut off as first gear needed to be used again.

“What you two need is money.”

“We’re not greedy though,” Tranquil rolled down the window slightly, noticing her boyfriend sweating a bit due to his awkward seat status.

“OF COURSE YOU’RE NOT! You’re poor. Greed is a rich man's game. Look you don't have to have a mansion in the hills, but no one accomplishes change in the world without money. I know a guy who works for a place. That's not me being coy that's literally how you refer to his business. Anyway, he can really make the difference for you guys. How do you currently wash your money?”

Noxious spoke up before Tranquill could make a joke, “we basically don't. But we don’t make enough to require it. We have been seeking out some form of fence for jewelry or other valuable things that are easy to sell.”

“That’s adorable. Yeah just sign up at the evil guildhall and they introduce you to ye olde jewelry fence. Look little guy...”

“I AM AVERAGE SIZE!!!”

“That's why you’re sitting in the middle then?” BP says as he rams the shifter into Nox’s leg and slows at a stop sign “Anyway, hear me out. You don't just run around town looking for random junk worth money, you’re a villain not a crackhead. You need to talk to the right people, the ones i'm going to introduce you to, and find out what they would want. Sometimes it’s an object, sometimes it’s a service. Sometimes it might be something right up your alley like gassing someone or making menacing threats.”

Tranquill chimed in, “this is what we need, he makes so many menacing threats for free currently.”

“Exactly. Now if ya find a bar of gold on the ground, or happen upon a car made of diamonds, then sure you bet your ass you take it and just give it to the guy and he’ll give you credit. But nothing compares to what you can make by finding them just what they need at a given time… Ok we’re here.”

The truck pulls up to an old iron security gate. Before them is a long driveway, weaving through clusters of lavish landscaping. He presses a button on the worn out sun visor then shuts it as the fabric nearly tears. The gate in front of them opens and he begins driving through.

“Wait… When… What…” Noxious stuttered, “ARE WE ROBBING SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?!”

“Yeah cause if we were, im wanting you to just scream about it,“ BP joked, “no this is my house, and it's nice to know you seeing it makes you want to rob it. Guess i'm doing a good job with it. Were gonna pull around back, wait, how the hell would i have a gate opener for a place i'm robbing?”

“I don't know…. Stole it ahead of time? Hacked it?” noxious knew he was digging his own grave deeper.

They pulled around to the back of the quite sizable home and into a ramp leading to a parking garage, one story below ground. This presented a stark contrast to the lush gardens they had recently passed. This basement was empty and plain, with a sofa on one wall crowded around a large tv, and a bed across the way on the adjacent wall. BP slowly pulled into a parking spot next to a luxurious looking car.

“See look at this place we have WAY more privacy to talk here. The whole place is sound proof. I'll have Alfred order a pizza and we can start talking about real business.”

“No you have to explain first,” Noxious insisted.

“Explain what?”

“EVERYTHING!”

BP leaned back on the broken tailgate of the truck “Uhhh… So in the beginning there was nothing, then BAM than mars and stars and cows and shit.”

“How about first WHO’S ALFRED?”

“The butler.”

“You have a butler named Alfred?” Tranquill giggled.

“Yeah i thought it would be funny.”

“What would be?” Noxious asked, getting dizzy at all he's had to take in.

“To name my butler Alfred.”

“WAIT YOU NAMED A BUTLER?” Tranquill protested in sheer confusion.

“You guys have a hard time staying on topic.” BP guided them over to the rather homely couch and they each took a seat. “So missy. I'm gonna ask you again. How serious are you about being a criminal.”

The tone of the room became more serious all of a sudden.

“I would follow him wherever he goes. Seriously. Even into the bathroom.”

“She’s like a cat,” added Noxious.

BP interrupted them. “You need to quit your job.”

 Tranq looked at the ground for a moment. “But… My debts. I worked hard to get a job in my field.”

“And you'll never be worse off for it, you'll take those skills with you into whatever you do but do you really wanna be working an office job when the cops show up? You guys have to start living this, it ain't the kinda lifestyle someone does on the weekends. You gotta be done with the nine to five, done with the rented storage shack and done with the BS small time jobs. I want you guys to move your lair in here, i want you guys to start taking jobs with me and get yourselves a proper home. I want you guys to win on this and i'll help but if it's not what you want, what you truly desire, then you gotta walk away before someone gets hurt.”

“This is…. A lot.”

Noxious stepped forward. “My burden of fixing this world is not something i want dragged into.”

BP stood up to outmatch noxious in height if not determination. “You’re not going to get what you want without help.”

A moment went by. The two of them stood in a quiet stillness like an old western movie. The energy seemed aggressive but it felt more compassionate than that. Noxious knew that in this moment BP was not questioning his motive, but instead he's being forced to question it himself.

“I want to quit my job,” Tranquil broke the silence, “I want out of that stupid storage container. I want the neighbor girl to stop whistling when i wash the van. I WANT TO GET RID OF THE VAN! I HATE THE STUPID VAN!”

“I HATE THE VAN TOO!” Noxious matched her energy “I HATE THE STUPID SHIFTER KNOB! It has no button and my thumb sits on the side of it funny.”

“I hate my job. I hate my debt. “

“Even if the button didn't function, it should still be there.”

“I hate all of my co workers. All of them. There's not one redeemable thought made in that building all day. I hate work i hate school and i hate everyone. That’s why i'm here. I want to wreck this world not just live in it.”

“THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT! LET'S KICK THE WORLD IN THE FACE!” BP grabbed a beer.

Noxious moved his hand in a ‘kinda’ gesture. “I'm more on the fixing it side… With gas.”

“YEAH let's tear down society!!!” Tranquill exclaimed.

“I'm like… Chaotic good if anything.”

“LET'S KICK LIFE IN THE BABY MAKER AND MAKE OUR OWN WAY!!!”

Noxious looked at both of them. “Screw it, burn the world down” he said as he reached down for a beer for him and Tranquill. They all clanked cans, BP and Tranq opened and chugged their beers. Noxious paused for a moment, then opened his beer, pulled up his mask and met their pace.

-----------------------supersecretspecialdeletedpatreonexclusivelike&subscribeOVENDING

“He was choking me man. He threatened me!”

“Who?”

“The little gas mask guy. The one from space 25.”

“Oh him. Leave em alone he just talks that way.”

“BUT HE THREATENED TO GAS ME!!”

“Out of everyone in this whole park he's the only one who visits my mom. No clue how they met but she loves the little guy. He's got a big heart. Since he's been around her depression is unnoticeable. She's baking more, laughing more. Seeing her happy and tasting her food again has lifted my spirits too. Leave him be, he makes people happy.”

[bbclesmis]

Salon: Watching PBS's "Les Misérables" as Notre Dame burned: A lesson in processing spectacular loss

The new version of Victor Hugo's tale has no familiar tunes to sweeten its tragedy. That feels very fitting now

By way of processing the shock of watching Notre Dame burn in Paris on Monday, I turned away from social media, where livestreams of the spreading flames were sadly plentiful, and turned on the latest adaptation of “Les Misérables,” currently airing on PBS’s “Masterpiece.”

This was mainly out of obligation, to be honest. The six-part series aired its first episode Sunday, the same night as the debut of a certain show starring zombies, dragons and queens. It is currently streaming online and via video on demand. Scheduling new installments of the “Masterpiece” epic as time-slot competition to the most popular show on the planet is pure folly; then again, something has to air at 9 p.m. Sundays. If you can’t serve up the flashiest show on television, might as well come in second.

Except this “Les Misérables” trades in substance, not dazzle. It has no music to it — literally. No renditions of the Broadway musical’s most familiar ditties such as “Master of the House,” no “On My Own.”

Andrew Davies’ adaption of Victor Hugo’s literary hulk (my softcover edition is 1,232 pages long) relies on the beholder to drink in the bitter imagery and soften her heart to the plight of characters who often cannot outrun their past failings regardless of what they do.

And although Hugo’s other great work, the 1831 novel “The Hunchback of Notre Dame,” has a direct influence on the history of Notre Dame — Tuesday it soared the top of Amazon France’s n the bestseller list on Amazon France — the spirit of this new “Les Misérables” is better suited the age in which we collectively bore witness to a conflagration consuming one of the world’s great monuments.

On social media the chorus could not quite find true harmony in our collective mourning. People shared photos taken from recent visits and musings as to what Notre Dame means to them; others stonily called out the Catholic Church’s various sins over the centuries, citing everything from its participation in and funding of the brutality of colonialism to its protection of sexual abusers. Still others scoffed at what they saw as another example of manufactured grief showcases by way of Twitter.

The voices became a dueling chorus between the Fantines and Jean Valjeans of the world and the Javerts, to look at it another way. In that respect, the PBS version of “Les Misérables” needs no melodies to sell it, because the sorrow and the harsh lawful judgment demonstrated throughout the story, as well as the grace radiating through its performances — with Dominic West as Valjean, Lily Collins’ Fantine and David Oyelowo’s Javert — are its songs.

Presenting the story as an abridged version of Hugo’s writing forces the viewer to absorb the misery its characters endure without the sugar of melodic performance, without distracting spectacle that allows us, in a way, to emotionally split from the horror of what we're seeing.

And his makes it a diametric contrast to "Game of Thrones," a pure act of spectacle and escapism. HBO’s epic is pure fantasy, even though it too has a historical basis, borrowing aspects of the plot from England’s War of the Roses.

But by incorporating mythical elements and magical forces, the series’ fans can emotionally detach somewhat from the tale’s tragedy. In no way am I suggesting that certain Monday mornings in the upcoming weeks won’t be bluer than usual as the show’s fans come to grips with the death of a beloved character or three in the previous night’s episode. But we can also count on such demises being rendered in ways fitting to how the character lived. Each will be a spectacle among spectacles.

This is what struck me as I watched a place to which I’ve made several pilgrimages over the years be devoured by an element as careless, cruel and unreasonable as flame. I abandoned my Catholicism years ago for the reasons the vocal critics who showed up on Monday listed, as well as much more personal ones. And yet I have laid some of the most significant prayers of my life at the stone feet of Joan of Arc; I have knelt in prayer at her chapel inside the landmark in honor of my deceased loved ones and the troubled living I hold dear. To see the spire fall felt like a conduit to the divine being broken, even though I can’t remember the last time I went to church on Sunday.

But for a portion of witnesses, at least some of those voicing their opinions on the Internet, bearing witness to the public destruction of a world landmark prized in part because it is a work of spectacle on a grand scale became a struggle between the desire to feel and remember, and an insistence on emotional remove, a mode of thought that insists, as we watch this grand wonder crumble in faraway France, that this is not about us, whoever “us” may be,  and it's certainly not about you as an individual.

The second episode in the series, airing Sunday, shows the tale’s tritagonist Fantine at her lowest point: she’s cut off all of her hair and sold it, along with her front teeth, in exchange for a measly sum of money to send to the Thenardiers, a pair of cruel grifters with whom she’s left her daughter. She’s already been fired from the factory where she found work. Left with nothing else to offer, and no other place of employment willing to take her, she’s turned to selling herself off piece by piece: first, her most prominent assets, then her body.

The sight of Collins’ Fantine in this version of “Les Misérables” brings to mind the word most  appropriate to the novel’s title: at her lowest point, she looks wretched.

Unlike Anne Hathaway, who won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her portrayal of Fantine in the 2012 theatrical version, Collins’s Fantine wears the gaps in her dental work like a badge of shame. The darkness in her mouth yawns wide at the viewer as she grimaces through physically and emotionally torturous encounters, particularly at the pivotal moment that a certain gentleman crosses her path.

The man is carousing and laughing with the other ladies of the evening, all in much better shape that Collins’ tragic heroine. And when he encounters her, he treats her like a joke. Asking for her rate, she responds, softly, with the offer of however much he thinks she is worth.

“How about… nothing, then?” he counters, roaring along with his friends. Fantine is too weak to offer much of a defense, only a plea for mercy.

“I have to live, monsieur,” she softly says, adding. “Same as you.”

The “gentleman” laughs in her face. “Same as me? Cheeky cow.”

In the musical version of “Les Misérables” this exchange is preceded by Fantine’s climactic solo “I Dreamed a Dream,” the kind of song that transfixes the audience, making it impossible to look away.

This is the song that made Susan Boyle famous, in case you may have forgotten. Back then Boyle’s looks were as frequently discussed as her angelic voice, after she found fame by way of a 2009 episode of “Britain’s Got Talent.” Would she have achieved international stardom if she hadn’t chosen that particular song? It is an anthem of human tragedy, one of the most beautiful created in modern times. And it romanced Boyle, a woman in her late 40s who had never been kissed, never gotten a chance to take center stage, into an international symbol of triumph.

Point being, we’re all made to be the same creatures under the sky, but not on the same playing field unless someone wills it to be so.

Central to “Les Misérables,” which was first published in 1862, are the various trials of Valjean, actual and spiritual, some imposed on him by Javert, the law enforcement officer obsessed with bringing him to justice for a petty crime for which he was never caught and tried. West and Oyelowo are outstanding individually and in the few tense scenes they share, because they each grapple uniquely with the concept of righteousness. Oyelowo’s assured severity evokes the weight of the law and righteousness as defined by man, which serves as Javert’s north star.

West on the other hand digs into the agony of Valjean’s ongoing spiritual conflict, as he’s constantly torn between doing the right thing by man’s law and following the way of divine justice. His life is a perilous tightrope walk between these poles, particularly when it comes to making amends for his failings by raising and caring for Fantine’s orphan Cosette (Ellie Bamber).

And there’s a comfort in engaging with “Les Misérables” denuded of the songbook that made Hugo’s 19th century story popular again among the late 20th century’s masses, particularly as we come to terms with what’s been lost in the fires that nearly destroyed a place many thought would stand forever.

The spire of Notre Dame has been replaced before; it fell in 1786. It has survived eons of natural deterioration and assaults at the hands of men, notably during the ages of Napoleon and French Revolution, two eras surrounding the main action in “Les Misérables.”

“The Hunchback of Notre Dame” and Hugo’s tragic story of the cathedral’s bell-ringer Quasimodo and his unrequited love for a gypsy named Esmeralda so thoroughly seduced 19th century Parisians that they were moved to campaign for the crumbling church’s restoration, an effort that spanned decades,  continuing even up to the day of the fire. If American Francophiles revisit the tale via the page or the various films it inspired in the coming days, no one should be surprised.

But I also hope that as part of that reconnection to history, more people balance the all-encompassing passion for “Game of Thrones” by also taking time to appreciate Davies’ latest take on Hugo’s other tale. “Hunchback” is a story set in Notre Dame, but “Les Misérables” captures the soft clash of emotions resulting from our insistent lamentation over its loss. It is a story that captures the essence of humanity and redemption, appropriate accompaniment for a great work of humankind revived time and again over the centuries, out of an urgent need to redeem what is best in us. That has been the case throughout many centuries, and it holds true even today.

https://www.salon.com/2019/04/17/watching-pbss-stoic-les-miserables-as-notre-dame-burned-a-lesson-in-processing-spectacular-loss/

[im-no-jedi]

I filled out some Guardian questions for my boys the other day, and they’re all in character! hopefully this will give you guys a better feel for what each of them act like c:

For Matt:

Where were you rezzed? My Ghost found me in the Cosmodrome, lying amongst a bunch of rusty old cars. I’m still wondering what I was doing there…

How long ago was it? About 5 years ago! A lot has happened since then too.

Did you have anything in your pockets? No, but I found a locket with a picture of a woman in it near where I was rezzed. I only just recently found it too. I don’t even know if it was mine or not. I wish I knew who the woman in the picture was…

What was your first week alive like? Very busy! I was excited to explore new worlds, but my ship lacked a warp drive, so I had to go searching in the Cosmodrome for one. That was… fun. And then once I got it, I ended up spending a little more time in the City to get more acquainted with the place.

How did you react to your new role as a Guardian? I was unsure I could do it at first, but when the Speaker told me about the Darkness, I knew that I had to do something to protect everyone in the City. The Traveler chose me for a reason. I feel like this is what I was always meant to be, you know? Is that weird?

Do you have any regrets? I… wish things didn’t go the way they did when we were going after Oryx. I feel like what happened to Isaac was my fault. Maybe if I had been smarter or stronger or whatever… I don’t know. I just feel responsible for it somehow.

How did you get your name? I don’t like to talk about it… but when I first tried out the Crucible, several of the other Guardians made fun of me after they saw how klutzy I was. They came and bullied me several times after that, calling me all sort of awful names. “Mat” was their favorite because of how often I fall on my face, I guess. Rocky stood up for me, which is how we first became friends, and he would always call me “Mat” too because he thought that’s what my name actually was. He didn’t know it was used to bully me. I finally gave up and just embraced the name because one, Matt is an actual name, and two, because I didn’t want to let those bullies be the ones to define who I was. If Rocky, my first real friend, wanted to know me as Matt, then that’s all that mattered. Also, I really do fall on my face a lot. And get stepped on. It’s fine.

Does your ghost have a name? Yes! His name is Willy. And I’m not going to dare talk about how he got that name; my own story is traumatizing enough.

What is your ghost like? He’s very friendly, very loud, and very charismatic. He reminds me a lot of Rocky, actually.

How do you feel about the last city and the vanguard? I love the City! Ever since I first came to it, it really felt like home. And the Vanguard are like family to me. Cayde welcomed me in like he’d known me his whole life when I first came to the City. Ikora inspires me to learn more about our world every day. And Zavala makes me want to be the best leader for my fireteam that I can be.

What’s your favorite place to go? Wherever my friends are!

Do you participate in strikes or the crucible? Yes, but only with my fireteam. I don’t think Rocky would let me even attempt either of those things without him, honestly.

How do you celebrate the holidays? For Crimson Days, Rocky and I pretty much spend all our time in the Crucible. For Festival of the Lost, I like dressing up and roleplaying as different people and creatures (last year, I was the Fanatic, and everyone said I mimicked his voice perfectly!). My favorite holiday is the Dawning; I love the beautiful snow and just spending time with my friends.

Who is your favorite NPC and who is your least favorite? Well uhh, my favorite is definitely Hawthorne because she… well she’s amazing in every way possible honestly, she’s smart and resilient and funny and dependable and really really pretty and she has a cool bird and oh geez am I rambling? Ehehe… And as for my least favorite, I don’t think I have one? I’m not really sure what to think of the Drifter; he comes across really friendly, but I don’t know how genuine he is. He didn’t seem too pleased when I got the Last Word either. But I’m not gonna worry about it.

Where do you sleep/call home? I stay in one of the rooms near the Hunter quarters. My old room was destroyed in the Red War, but I was able to recover most of my stuff. I like to collect artifacts and weapons from other species, as well as some stuff from the Golden Age. Cayde appreciates my collection, probably due to the fact that he has his own collection, but I organize my stuff waaaaaaaay better than he does.

Do you have any pets or companions? Rocky can behave like a pet sometimes… otherwise it’s just my Ghost. I spend a lot of time with Rocky’s kids, they seem to like me a lot. Especially Poofy. She and I get along the best. She likes it when I style her hair and clean her claws.

Does anyone live with you? Just my Ghost, although Rocky used to spend the night with me sometimes before he met Silfy.

How do you unwind or comfort yourself? I mostly like to spend time with my friends, but if I’m by myself? I’ll usually end up singing to pass the time. I like to dance too. I seem to do better on my feet when I’m dancing than if I’m doing… well anything else really.

What would truly break you? I have nightmares sometimes of my friends turning to the Darkness… I don’t ever want to think about something like that actually happening…

Most embarrassing moment? Probably the first time I met Hawthorne… I was a complete babbling mess and then tripped on a rock and smashed my face to boot. Willy couldn’t even heal me at the time either. I had a black eye for a week. I honestly don’t know why she even bothered talking to me anymore after that. She probably just felt sorry for me…

Any cherished memories? Meeting Rocky for the first time. And Isaac. And Hannah. And all my other friends. I’ve lived a really good life so far.

What was your highest and/or lowest point? My highest point would probably be when Rocky and I defeated Oryx. Which ironically came after my lowest point… when Isaac sacrificed himself for the rest of us. I secluded myself from everyone after that happened, even Rocky. I felt terrible. I told myself I would never do anything like that again, no matter what.

Views on the enemy races? I find them fascinating, but also acknowledge them as enemies. I respect the Fallen the most, and I wish more of them were like Silfy and her kids. I think we could live in peace with them if they wanted.

Which enemy race is your most/least favorite? I guess the Fallen would be my most favorite, and my least favorite is definitely the Taken. The idea that something could become totally consumed by Darkness like that… it’s terrifying.

For Rocky:

Where were you rezzed? uhh I don’t remember, I think it was on some moon? I’ll ask Mo later

How long ago was it? like 6 or 7 years ago

Did you have anything in your pockets? LOL I didn’t even have pockets!

What was your first week alive like? I had no idea what the frick I was doing

How did you react to your new role as a Guardian? I thought it was pretty sweet that I had all these powers and was super strong and stuff like that. not dying anymore was pretty cool too

Do you have any regrets? NO REGRETS MUTHAFRICKER

How did you get your name? people just started calling me Rocky cause it sounds like my real name, Roq, which you say like “rock”, so yeah it was a no brainer

Does your ghost have a name? her name is Mo! I don’t remember why I called her Mo, she just looks like a Mo

What is your ghost like? she’s super spunky and doesn’t take any crap. she likes to tell me what to do all the time. she’s great.

How do you feel about the last city and the vanguard? the city’s pretty cool, I guess. same with the vanguard. some people think I don’t like Ikora cause she’s boring, but dude, she’s still got the highest win streak in the Crucible, so I respect the heck outta her

What’s your favorite place to go? the crucible, duh! don’t care what map, just stick me in there, baby! (hehe)

Do you participate in strikes or the crucible? uhh YEAH!!!! I basically live in the crucible, and I go on strikes with my fireteam all the time. I’m a man of many talents~

How do you celebrate the holidays? crimson days is the best holiday EVER, I get to spend all day in the crucible with my best friend, what’s better than that? festival of the lost and the dawning are pretty cool too. I like putting on creepy masks for festival and throwing snowballs at people during the dawning. oh and eating Eva’s cookies!! oh man, now I’m hungry…

Who is your favorite NPC and who is your least favorite? what’s an NPC? is that a person? cause other than Matt and Silfy, my favorite person is Shaxx, duh. Saladin’s cool too. and my least favorite, uhh… I don’t like the way Asher talks to me, he makes me feel stupid

Where do you sleep/call home? got a nice little place near the Titan quarters. I had to get a new one after the Red War and then another one after Silfy and the kids moved in

Do you have any pets or companions? the kids are more like pets than actual kids right now. probably cause of the claws

Does anyone live with you? Mo, Silfy, and the three kids: Kiki, Kip, and Poofy

How do you unwind or comfort yourself? if I’m not duking it out in the Crucible, I go to the bar and get drinks with Shaxx and Cayde

What would truly break you? nothing can ever break me, wtf?? I got muscles for days, chump! or is this some kinda mental bullcrap, in which case, I still can’t be broken! nope! not even if all my friends were gone and I was the only person left alive! nnnnnope! just don’t… just don’t look at me ok DON’T LOOK AT ME

Most embarrassing moment? pfffft I don’t get embarrassed, I have NO shame, I literally went into the Crucible nude once, my dudes

Any cherished memories? the first time I won a Crucible match… oh man that was so sweet… and, you know, I guess meeting Matt was pretty cool too, since he was my first friend and everything

What was your highest and/or lowest point? highest point was helping Saladin take care of siva and him making me a friggin Iron Lord, baby!! and I don’t get low points ok, I’m always high (hehe). I mean yeah, I was pretty bummed when I found out Saint-14 was dead, just like stupid Isaac when he got himself killed trying to protect me and Matt, like seriously, isn’t the whole point of being a guardian is that you never die?? so why did they die?? it’s just dumb is what it is, it’s just dumb…

Views on the enemy races? I LOVE THE HIVE THEY’RE FRIGGIN SWEET. and of course, the Fallen are really cool, and the Taken are cool, and the Scorn are just AWESOME, man why do the bad guys have to be so cool?? yeah I’m not gonna hesitate to kill em whenever I get the chance but… can’t a guy appreciate a sweet lookin alien without being judged??

Which enemy race is your most/least favorite? I like Hive the best, but I gotta give props to the Fallen too cause you know, the whole I got a family of Fallen now thing. the ones I like the least are the Vex cause they’re just stupid robots, like it’s an insult to the rest of us robots who have brains and stuff. Vex have zappy milk goo in their bellies and think they’re all that cause they can time travel or whatever, well you know what I can do?? benchpress a cabal tank, that’s what I can do!! get on my level, Vex LOSERS!!!

For Isaac:

Where were you rezzed? The Dreaming City, in the former location of my father’s library of Awoken history.

How long ago was it? Over 200 years ago.

Did you have anything in your pockets? No.

What was your first week alive like? Nothing worth repeating.

How did you react to your new role as a Guardian? I thought it was pointless. I didn’t care about “saving the world” or whatever.

Do you have any regrets? No.

How did you get your name? The Speaker thought he was being clever by giving me a name that related to laughter since he had never heard me laugh before. He never actually did hear me laugh before he died.

Does your ghost have a name? His name is GG. Don’t ask what it stands for.

What is your ghost like? He’s very kind and dependable. He does what he’s told. He also can’t speak, all his communications are through beeps and other robotic noises. I don’t know why he has no voice. But I understand him perfectly. And he understands me. That’s all that matters.

How do you feel about the last city and the vanguard? I didn’t think much of the City when I first came to it. I still don’t, but I’m used to it now, and I call it my home, so… As for the Vanguard, Ikora and Zavala are the only ones I respect. Cayde is an idiot. I’m surprised it took him as long as it did to finally get himself killed.

What’s your favorite place to go? My personal secret library that only a few people are allowed into.

Do you participate in strikes or the crucible? I don’t care for the Crucible, nor am I allowed in it normally. Shaxx thinks that my methods are “unfair” to the other participants. I only participate during Crimson Days, and only with a select few. And by select few, I mean only Hannah and Fon. Don’t. Ask.

How do you celebrate the holidays? I don’t. But my friends force me into doing stuff with them anyway.

Who is your favorite NPC and who is your least favorite? Ikora is the one I trust the most. Toland is an absolute fool, and I’m going to physically drag him through the nine different layers of hell until he’s nothing but a bad memory to the rest of humanity.

Where do you sleep/call home? I live in my library.

Do you have any pets or companions? Only my Ghost.

Does anyone live with you? Again, only my Ghost.

How do you unwind or comfort yourself? I stay in my library. Alone. I also like to play the violin. Don’t even think about asking.

What would truly break you? If I had come back to life and found my library in shambles, I would’ve killed myself again.

Most embarrassing moment? Non-existent.

Any cherished memories? I… admit, it was… nice seeing that certain people were happy to see me alive again. And that Ikora hadn’t let anybody into my library after I was gone.

What was your highest and/or lowest point? I don’t like putting labels on things like that. My life has been playing out as intended.

Views on the enemy races? I don’t know why they insist on attacking humanity and the Traveler. It’s proven time and time again that it’s the most powerful force in the universe, so trying to kill or overtake it is a lost cause. Anyone who thinks the Darkness is more powerful than the Light is a fool.

Which enemy race is your most/least favorite? The Vex interest me the most. Osiris and I studied them a lot before he left the City. He’s been filling me in on what he’s learned in the Infinite Forest after I was brought back to this time period. All of the other races are pretty dumb. Especially the Cabal. They’re like an entire race of wrinkly, noseless Titans. It’s ridiculous.

[plumbobpost]

Fan(fic) Friday: Spotlight on Peni Griffin

Sul sul!

Today, I have a special treat for you guys. I had the chance to ask the very delightful @penig a few questions about Widespot and The Sims in general. For those of you who aren’t familiar with her work, she has created two widely popular hoods for The Sims 2: Land Grant University and the aforementioned Widespot. It’s longer than usual, and Peni expressed the concern that it would needed to be edited down, but in all honesty, her responses were such a wealth of information, deleting any of it seemed wrong.

I’ll stop teasing you, and let Peni speak for herself:

What inspired you to create Widespot?

“I’m always in story creation mode. This has been a large part of the appeal of The Sims 2 for me, as it allows me to tell a particular kind of story that I will never, ever be able to write for publication,  and have always wanted to: the story of a community in which we see every character as the hero of her own story, and how all the stories intertwine (often without the protagonists recognizing it) and affect each other as they all go about their business.” 

“At the time I started Widespot, I was in a situation in which my normal professional outlets were not available to me. You will excuse me from going into detail on the subject, which can be summed up as Health Crap. For our purposes, the important thing was that I needed a project, I couldn’t work on a book, I had been thinking for some time about the potential of my favorite game as a storytelling medium, and enough discussion of the matter had been generated over at MTS that I found/was directed to the late lamented Mootilda’s thread on creating a clean, safe, populated neighborhood for sharing.  ( http://modthesims.info/t/455403)”

“I actually went into some detail about the process on my writing blog at the time.”

( https://penigriffin.blogspot.com/2013/02/so-you-want-to-share.html )

Did you take inspiration from the Maxis neighborhoods?

“To a certain extent, yes. I decided that what I wanted to create was a neighborhood that would feel and play as if it had shipped with the game, but with less mess. No dead people without full character data, no memories that outright contradict each other, no hints in the bios that can’t be fully explored in the game.”

In your neighborhood, you included different story elements for each family that interconnect. What is your process in developing this story?

“Somewhere around here, I have the notebook in which I first started working it out, but I’d have to dig to find it. I remember starting with the admonition to myself to keep it simple, as your first attempt at publishing in a medium should be simple - you have enough to do mastering the new medium without trying to make something complicated with it. I knew my genre was soap opera, and though I’ve never been much of a soap watcher, my mother and husband are, so that set my parameters. I listed the tools at my disposal - the five base game aspirations, the jealousy mechanics, and the generational play. The question I asked myself at the start of the process was: “How do I create the most Drama for the least amount of effort?”

“Probably the notion of having five aspiration-themed households came almost at once, possibly as I started making name lists. I wanted to give elders a big role, because I had noticed that a lot of people thought elders were “boring,” and I knew they were wrong! I’ve always felt that Maxis missed a big trick by not having a Scheming Matriarch in Pleasantview. I wanted to shake up some stereotypes and have sims who didn’t obviously “belong” in their aspirations - shy Romance sims, outgoing Knowledge sims, lazy Fortune sims. I wanted all the households intimately connected to each other, which meant that for simplicity’s sake the story (story being defined as “person with a problem”) should center around one particular event that triggered events in all the households, a cascade of consequence. At which point I wrote down “It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a fortune must be in want of a wife,” and decided that the wealthy Mann family coming to town with a highly marriageable son and a Dark Secret was a good place to start.”

“That turned out not to be the trigger, but you have to start somewhere.”

Aside from your official captions, how did you set out to convey plot to those who play Widespot?

“I tried to take pictures of enough key moments that the players could inspect the albums for clues. By playing out the development I had ensured that some important information already existed in the memories and relationship panels, but I also went in and inserted memories that seemed to me significant. I had specific meanings in mind when I gave Mary memories of potty-training her younger siblings that extend all the way back to teenhood and manipulated some of her relationship scores with the testing cheats, but I wanted the players to be free to interpret those memories and relationships according to their own ideas, so I tried to background my own opinions as much as possible.”

“The plot, after all, is the players’ job, not mine!”

As far as literal world building goes, how did you factor in your characters’ surroundings to both their plotlines and their characterization?

“The smallness of the town, necessitated by the decision to keep things as simple as possible, gave me the starting point and the town’s name - it’s just a wide spot in the road, hardly a town at all. Rural areas have a certain vibe; certain types of people grow up there, and certain kinds of people wind up there, so this was on my mind as I designed the characters, built their homes, and decided what order they should be created in CAS and moved in.  Each house has a history, not all of which is necessarily made explicit to the player, and some of which really, really made me long for something more than BG Maxis content! But I think most people get that the Land cabin was built piecemeal over time, that a lot of Skye’s house was DIY, that the Beech house is Daytona’s house and the rest of her family just lives there, etc. Skye only got educational toys for his kids, but the Lands have a teddy and a dollhouse as well. The Mann’s house is the only one with a fence, and Rich ensures his privacy with stained glass windows in certain rooms. He also has that ominous closet full of aspiration rewards. (I hate that I couldn’t get him a counterfeiting machine - he clearly needs one.)”

“Some details were dictated by the game mechanics. Penny needed a double bed to get pregnant in, but there’s no particular reason for one to exist on her lot; so the heck with it, everybody in that house gets a double bed and I don’t even try to explain it. The lowest-numbered playable in the hood is always the telescope slapper, so I had to create the Mann family first in order for the guy with the Dark Secret to be the one who was incensed at the possibility of being spied on. But who would beard Rich in his own den when he, Lana, or Junior used the telescope in the daytime? That would be the local cop, wouldn’t it? This is why the Land house (with the nubile Land daughters) is right behind the Mann house and the Mann telescope is pointed straight at it. I also used the house to train the Manns - especially Junior - into wanting to buy things by furnishing it minimally to start with, and then adding items as wants were rolled for expensive artwork, games, etc.”

“When I gave characters their starting skill points, I assigned them partly at random, partly according to the implied backstory and role, and partly according to what would be possible in the game. If logic or a random roll indicated that someone in a household had a skill, I made sure that suitable skilling items existed in that household. Woody has an easel because it’s a solitary tool for gaining creativity points; the other families have the more sociable piano.  Neither family is much concerned about the impression they make on the outside world, so they are not oversupplied with mirrors, unlike the other families, where Charisma matters.”

“This all works back and forth; the character or situation requires something in the setting, and then I realize that having this thing here means that I also need this and that means I should improve the relationship between these two characters, or whatever. My first and best playtester insisted to me that Goldie needed a teddy bear, and made a good case for it based on Goldie’s characterization, both in the bios and as played; and she was right, so I added it almost at the last minute. (Which is why, so often, the first thing Rhett does it pick it up and try to talk to someone through it.)”

“One thing that I was aware of during development, but am a little reluctant to discuss, is the possible implications for the setting of the racial makeup of the neighborhood. At the time I was born, in the state where I was born, the Land and Beech marriages would have been illegal; and I had that in mind when I mentioned familial disapproval in the Land bios. Some people pick that up and run with it, most people ignore it. Most people look at the Hart’s Spanish-style house and decide (despite the name) that the family has a Mediterranean or Mexican background, but others have decided that Valentine is black/white biracial and all the Spanish influence comes from Angel. I have no desire to dictate anybody’s interpretation or play style, but I do want to enable as many interpretations and play styles as possible, and this variety is an indication of success to me.”

In a lot of ways, fans have come to regard Widespot as highly as they regard the original three Maxis neighborhoods. Did you envision the neighborhood being this popular?

“I beat my “expectations” about the reception of any particular work to death years ago. While I was building Widespot, I told myself that if the only person who liked it was Aegagropilon (my first playtester), that would be good enough and anybody else’s approval would be gravy. Well, Aegagropilon loved it; and I’ve lapped up quite a bit of gravy since then. I don’t have much of a grasp of how popular it actually is, and that’s not the important thing. The important thing is that I know some people are playing it, and enjoying it, and using it in different ways. How many there are, and how it stacks up next to the many other (and in some cases far more sophisticated) fan made hoods out there, is out of my hands. I’m better off not dwelling on that.”

How did Widespot evolve after you started? Were there any massive deviations from your original plan?

“Development was an alternating process of playing (including building, character design, and actual play) and working things out on paper in illegible notes, which is always how I work. I haven’t properly thought anything till I’ve written it down, but I’m a “pantser” rather than a “plotter” - i.e. I tend to fly by the seat of my pants when creating. Too much planning kills the story for me. So once all the preliminary work had been set up, and the broad strokes of the storyline determined, the rest was done directly in the game, with a little help from the testing cheats, Tombstone of Life and Death, and so on.”

“I knew I needed to wind up with a baby for every adult woman, but I didn’t always know who specifically would be the father of each baby until I saw how characters interacted. I knew one of the households would have a ghost, but for awhile I thought it might be Lana. I assumed Candy would have two lovers but I thought one of them would be Hamilton until she informed me otherwise. As mentioned earlier, I thought the Manns would be the central, triggering household rather than the Harts. I had no plans for the teens or children at all, and they took care of their own storylines”.

On a different note, what was your inspiration for the dynamic between the Harts and the rest of Widespot’s inhabitants? How did you develop the idea for these entanglements?

“As a family of Romance sims, their job was to wreak havoc. And boy, howdy, did they! But only after I realized Angel had to be the town ghost. The family ran much too smoothly when she was in charge - she and Valentine constantly smooching it up, Rhett being Mama’s boy, Candy being Goldie’s social support. Kill Angel, and everybody falls apart and starts making bad decisions. I designed Valentine as a Dirty Old Man; but he refused to be only that. I designed Rhett as a heartless jerk, and he can be that - but he’s also the only one of the immature Mama’s boys in the hood who has lost his Mama. I designed Candy as a golddigger, and yeah, she is - but she also made friends with Daytona and Goldie without any prompting from me, and she put herself in the middle of what turned out to be the hardest knot to untie in the whole hood, the Mann Triangle.”

“And Goldie - well, Goldie was a darling who autonomously put the rest of her family ahead of herself repeatedly, could never finish her homework, and never once brought anyone home from school or came home with anyone else.”

“TL;DR: I didn’t develop the Harts. They did.”

You’ve been very active on both Mod the Sims and Tumblr for a while now. How has The Sims community evolved since you first got involved? Why do you think there is still such a strong following of the series?

“It’s hard for me to speak to how it’s evolved, since I was never part of the Age of LJ and only started playing Sims 2 since after Sims 3 was already out. Also, having been on the fringes of a lot of subcultures in my life, I have become adept at keeping away from the stuff that stresses me out. So I’ve never hung out at SimSecret. I block tags on tumblr. I avoid anything smacking of edition wars, don’t allow anonymous communication, and back out of controversies as fast as I can - with an apology if necessary, because face it, everybody’s a jerk on the internet sometimes, and the most you can hope for is to not be one any more often than you can help.”

“So I have no idea how the Sims community as a whole is going on, and I only have a limited knowledge of the portion of the Sims 2 fandom that hangs around specifically at MTS and attracts my attention on Tumblr (often by tagging Widespot). Within this limited sphere, I have noticed a few changes. I used to see it assumed as common consensus that all Maxis premades were “ugly” and that “ugly” is a bad thing; moreover, that certain sims - Goopy Gilscarbo and Sandy Bruty in particular - are more “ugly” than most and are to be avoided at all costs. Now people are shipping Goopy and Sandy (that’s largely @holleyberry’s doing, I believe) and embracing the cartooniness of sims with enthusiasm.”

“On older websites I often see “realistic” (i.e., modeled on airbrushed photos in fashion magazines) sims that, as far as I can tell, are identical to each other and to the ones on the other old websites they link to. With current websites, however, I can not only tell the sims from each other, I can tell Person A’s versions of the premades from Person B’s at a glance. This is especially marked on tumblr, where I often know who originally posted the pics I’m looking at regardless of the attached avatar.”

“And there has been such a flowering of creativity in so many directions in the last eight years it’s overwhelming, though I don’t know how that compares to the days before I started participating. I like to think of Widespot as the vanguard of a Golden Age of hood-sharing. Nobody moans about the lack of clean fan made neighborhoods anymore; they’re agonizing over whether to play Europa or Widespot or Emerald Heights or Polgannon. And suddenly people are making new face sliders. Neighborhood deco lights up at night now. There’s mods for parking on the street, taking toddlers and pets on vacation, hunting, foraging, beekeeping, on and on and on.”

“I think the main difference between now and eight years ago is, that people were defensive about still playing Sims 2, and a general air of playing a “dying game” hung over us all. Now we are joyous and defiant and declaring that Our Game is the Best and Will Never Die.”

“Or maybe that’s just the people I self-select to see. How would I know?”

As a writer by trade, did you find many similarities between creating Widespot and writing a novel?

“My experience has always been that there’s an underlying unity among all kinds of creation, and in particular that storytelling is storytelling, whether it’s the language of text, sound, line and color, or whatever. My writing habits and skills translated seamlessly into the medium of the game. The chief difference, once you factor out technical matters, is that in most forms of storytelling, you need to provide a discrete unit of Story and give the reader the pleasures of closure and narrative structure, pruning out everything that disrupts that weakens the sense of completeness.”

“When making a sims neighborhood, though, you need to be as open-ended as possible, and you need to discern the optimum moment to turn the hood over to the player, while it’s still bristling with plot hooks and unresolved situations. You don’t need, as I did, to deliberately choose the moment at which a bunch of hard choices must be made immediately; but you need to put the player into a situation in which the choices he makes will matter and shape how the neighborhood develops from that point.”

You often play neighborhoods like Pleasantview and Strangetown. Do you prefer playing your own sims or those created by Maxis?

“That’s like asking if I prefer to read Diana Wynne Jones or Megan Whelan Turner. (And if you aren’t familiar with those authors, boy do you have some great reading ahead of you!) The answer is “both.” I enjoy playing characters I’m engaged with, regardless of who made them. Sometimes I wonder what’s going on with Vidcund and want to play Strangetown; sometimes I want to reconnect with the sims in Drama Acres, my personal custom neighborhood; sometimes I want to play with some of my own plot hooks from Widespot. It’s all good.”

If you had to pick between Widespot and Land Grant University, which would you choose?

“I’d attach LGU to Widespot and play them both. I don’t do either/or choices.”

(She just defeated the Kobayashi Maru.)

Do you intend on creating more neighborhoods?

“I actually have three on hand right now: a downtown called Bigg City (an empty version of which is available on SFS  http://simfileshare.net/download/207580/ ); a Seasons/Pets neighborhood I call Knotthole County; and an AL neighborhood called Port Cochere. The populated Bigg City got real complicated, real fast and when Health Crap is in a certain state I can’t work on it. Knotthole County is almost completely built but got interrupted while I was designing the characters; and Port Cochere is an SC4 map and a bunch of illegible notes. And at the moment I can’t work on any of them because I need two disk drives in order to use AGS, and one of them has gone wonky. However, I should be able to replace that soon, and then - well, maybe I’ll finally get that last week of work done on Bigg City. Or maybe I’ll decide (again) that if I’m organized enough to work on that, I should seize the moment and get queries out instead.”

Your content is themed around The Sims 2; have you played other titles in the series?, If so, which installment in The Sims is your favorite to play? For storytelling? For building? For creating sims?

“I’m a late adopter by nature. I started with the original The Sims and played it till I felt I didn’t have anything more to discover in it, at which time I started looking into the Sims 2, assuming that I’d eventually plumb its depths, too, and move on to Sims 3 about the time Sims 4 came along. Then I discovered that Sims 2’s depths are unplumbable, and that it was the perfect vehicle for that all-community storytelling I’d always longed to do.”

“The more I learn about the later iterations, the more certain I am that I will never play them. I’m sure they’re fun in their own ways, and I certainly don’t look down on anyone who chooses to play them; but I don’t like the way they look, I don’t like the lack of a storytelling tool, and most of all, the mechanics and structure of the game don’t enable my style of neighborhood play. The Sims series consists of four distinct games with four distinct sets of strengths and weaknesses; and the first two are the only ones I feel any call to play.”

Lastly, why do you still continue to play The Sims? Do you feel that the games provide a positive creative outlet?

“It still gives me pleasure. And I still have Health Crap and need projects, and have a computer that will play it. The Sims 2 is as much a part of my life as reading and playing tabletop RPGs and board games with my friends. So why would I stop?”

“The game is a positive creative outlet - it has nothing to do with my feelings on the subject. One of the most rewarding things about having made Widespot and LGU is seeing people use them as springboards for developing and experimenting with their own creative capacities. Also, a lot of simmers are deliberately using the game to control or relieve some condition or other. Depression, OCD, chronic pain from which they need distraction - I’m not the only one with Health Crap, and I am honored whenever anyone uses something I made to  deal with theirs.”

“They could have done these things without me, of course - but they didn’t. They used something I made for their own benefit, and I can feel good about that.”

Any parting comments, teasers, spoilers, public service announcements, etc.?

“One of the core concepts by which I live my life is that creativity is the quality that defines humanity best, and that it is the birthright of every single one of us. But we’ve been educated to think that it’s something special and separate, accessible only to certain special “talented” people; and brainwashed to think that personal creativity that can’t be monetized is a trivial use of time. On the contrary, creativity is to a large extent what time is for. Whether it’s a book, or a game, or a prom dress, the process of making is fulfilling and enriching, and sharing what we make is nourishing to us and to those we share with. So whatever your medium is, whatever resources are available to you, whatever ideas are quickening in your brain and hands - go for it.”

“It is not a silly waste of time.”

To those of you who haven’t played Widespot, go check it out; you won’t regret it. Thanks again to Peni Griffin for allowing me to pick her brain, and I hope you all enjoyed reading it. I certainly found a new favorite word in “pantser.”

If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions, feel free to visit my ask box. If you are interested, give Plumbob Post a follow, and reblog for anyone else who you think would enjoy this blog. Stay tuned for upcoming posts!

Dag dag!

[gracewithducks]

“The Next Right Thing” - Faith at the Movies: Frozen 2 (preached 1/5/2020)

During the month of January, our worship services are based around current movies! We started this week with Frozen II. There are spoilers here, so consider yourself warned!

 A brief summary of the movie was shared for anyone who hasn’t seen it:

 In the first Frozen movie, we met Anna and Elsa, two royal sisters in the kingdom of Arendelle. Elsa has magic powers to control ice and snow; she has to learn to let her sister share her secret, and Elsa learns to embrace and control her powers.

 In the second movie, everyone seems happy and content – but Elsa is hearing a voice no one else can hear. When magical powers force the people of Arendelle to abandon their kingdom, the sisters set out to find out the truth about the past and right some unknown wrong. They follow the mysterious voice into an enchanted forest, where they encounter enemies who turn out to be friends, and discover the truth about the past. Their grandfather, when king, had offered a “gift of peace” – a dam – to the neighboring people; however, the dam was a trap, and their grandfather’s fear started the violence which now forced the sisters from their home. In order to right the wrong and make peace, the dam must be destroyed, even if it means destroying the kingdom of Arendelle in the process.

 And, without spoiling everything for anyone who hasn’t seen the movie yet – and it’s well worth seeing – there is a happy ending!

  When our oldest daughter was five years old, she was obsessed with the movie Frozen. She watched it over and over again, until she could recite every single line and sing every song along with every single character. She sang “Let It Go” for a talent show; she received an Elsa dress for her birthday, and she wore that dress to her birthday party – and for Halloween – and just about every single day after school. When she wasn’t in the gown, she was wearing any of a dozen shirts and outfits featuring Elsa’s face. Even though I tried, repeatedly, to tell her that Anna – Elsa’s sister – is actually the hero of the story, not to mention the character with orange hair much like my daughter’s own hair, no one could compete with Elsa’s sparkling blue dress and soaring theme song. In fact, our daughter loved Elsa so much that she was angry with her dad and me, asking us repeatedly, “Why didn’t you name me Elsa?”

 Our youngest daughter is now five, and she sleeps in Elsa pajamas. Earlier this year, she chose to use her own money to purchase yet another new Elsa doll – which she carries with her everywhere and sleeps with every night. She has an Elsa swimsuit; for Christmas, all she asked for was – and I quote – “all the Elsa stuff.” In the last year she has worn and worn out four different Elsa dresses, and she still changes in an Elsa dress after school whenever we give her the chance. But I knew that we had really come full circle when, not too long ago, our five-year-old asked, “Why didn’t you name me Elsa?”

 So when I tell you that the new Frozen movie has been eagerly anticipated in our household, I hope that you understand exactly what that means. Finally, finally, finally, we got to see the movie. And it did not disappoint.

 There’s a lot in this movie: there are of course lots of silly jokes – like the unmelt-able sentient snowman obsessed with his own mortality; there is a pure 80s power love ballad; there are singing reindeer and adorable creatures and catchy songs. And there are even more gorgeous dresses with which my girls are now obsessed.

 But this movie also has an incredible amount of depth. My husband – who’s also a pastor, and also preaching about faith that the movies (and who doesn’t look nearly as good in a princess dress as I do) – my husband Mike and I have been having fun wrestling with all the different themes and possible directions this Sunday might take.

 There’s the snowman’s theory that water has memory – a theory which actually carries the plot in some significant ways – and which you will hear about in a baptism sermon someday.

 There’s this journey that the sisters go on; in the first movie, they learned how to be sisters, how to come together and love one another, but in this story, they learn that loving doesn’t just mean holding on tight, but it’s possible to love one another while still learning to let go and each stand on her own.

 There’s the subplot where Anna’s boyfriend Kristoff is trying to propose to Anna, but keeps bumbling and messing things up – and the realization that even when we love each other dearly, sometimes, we still say and do things exactly wrong.

 There’s the reality that so many terrifying enemies turn out in fact to be allies and friends, while the real enemy, the real evil, is found much closer to home – and one of the greatest lines of the movie, when Elsa realizes, “Fear is what can’t be trusted.”

 There’s Elsa’s realization that the person she’s been searching for, the one who can give her answers about the meaning and purpose of her life – is herself.

 There’s the power of loving your enemy, which has its own magic and starts us on the road to making things right.

 And of course, there’s a whole lot of consideration to inherited systems of injustice, to generational privilege and prejudice, to the ways our fear and greed cause harm to others and to all creation, and how – eventually – the consequences of our actions will come home to roost.

 And that’s all good stuff. And I could preach a month or two worth of sermons just on this one “kids’ movie” alone.

 But I’m not going to. Instead, today, I want to focus on one specific character, one scene, and one song.

 And as fate would have it – because I ordered my costume before I’d even seen the movie – as fate would have it, today, I want to talk about Anna.

 In many ways, Anna is the secondary sister, the one who never really emerges from her sister’s shadow – even though, as I said, she emerges as the true hero. But Anna seems okay with her role; she loves her sister, and all she wants is for Elsa to be safe and successful.

 When Elsa hears a mysterious voice, even though she can’t hear it herself, Anna insists on going on the journey with her; she promises, “I won’t let anything happen to her.” Whenever Elsa tries to leave Anna behind, Anna runs into danger right after her sister – until finally, fearing for Anna’s safety, Elsa literally flings her away, sending her down the river in an icy canoe.

 And Anna ends up escaping the cold river, hiding from earth giants, trapped in a dark cave – literally, she ends up in the pit. While there, she learns the truth about the past; she glimpses the memory that Elsa left her behind to discover, the wrong that needs to be set right. And what she realizes is that – there’s this dam, this dam which was built as a supposed gift to the kingdom’s neighbors, but was in fact a trick, a trap, and it was Elsa and Anna’s own grandfather who struck first against his unarmed ally, and started the violence which led everyone to this place.

 Anna realizes that, to set the wrongs right, she needs to destroy that dam – even though it means that her home, her sister’s kingdom, will be flooded and destroyed. The people have already been driven out of their homes by the angry nature spirits, and now she knows why: it’s so they’ll be safe, when the wave of water comes.

 Anna knows now what she has to do. She explains to her companion, the loveable living snowman Olaf, and she begins to search for a way out of the cave.

 But then snowflakes start to appear.

 And Olaf realizes he’s flurrying – the magic that holds him together, Elsa’s magic that holds him together, is failing; the snowman is starting to fall apart.

 And Olaf says, “I think Elsa went too far... Anna, I’m sorry; you’re going to have to do this next part on your own.”

 Then, while Anna holds him, Olaf says, “Hey Anna? I just thought of one thing that’s permanent: Love.”

 Oh friends, there’s a sermon there: Olaf has been struggling with how everything keeps changing, throughout the whole story, trying to find something that doesn’t change – and in his final breaths, he says, “I finally get it: it’s love.”

 While Anna gives him one last warm hug, Olaf flurries away.

 And Anna is alone. Anna, who struggled so much with being alone in the beginning of her story. Anna, whose whole life has been in so many ways defined by others – by the prince she was willing to marry, even though they’d just met; by the sister, who struggled with her own secrets and powers; by her friendship with Olaf, by her relationship with Kristoff – Anna is alone.

 This moment finds Anna weeping in the pit – the pit, the lowest point, the place of hopelessness and despair, which we find throughout scripture – that’s where Anna is. Literally, she’s in a deep, dark, cold cave. She thinks her boyfriend abandoned her for a new friend and some reindeer – he didn’t, but that’s another story; she thinks he did; she thinks he left her behind. Her sister literally threw her down the river, and based on the disintegration of Elsa’s magic, Anna assumes her sister is lost – drowned, as their mother had warned them, in the river of memories; drowned, and not coming back. Olaf has turned to flurries in her arms. And she’s learned that the only way to finish the story, the only way to make all those sacrifices mean something, is by finding a way to destroy a dam and, in the process, destroy her own home.

 This is Anna’s Garden of Gethsemane. This is Anna’s “why have you forsaken me?” This is Anna’s “let the cup pass from me.” This is where Anna’s grief threatens to drag her under. This is her lowest point; this is the pit of her despair.  There in the cave, she curls up into herself, and she cries. And then she starts to sing. And I’m not going to sing for you – but I want to read for you the lyrics of Anna’s song:

 I’ve seen dark before, but not like this This is cold, this is empty, this is numb The life I knew is over, the lights are out Hello, darkness, I’m ready to succumb   I follow you around, I always have But you’ve gone to a place I cannot find This grief has a gravity, it pulls me down But a tiny voice whispers in my mind “You are lost, hope is gone But you must go on And do the next right thing”   Can there be a day beyond this night? I don’t know anymore what is true I can’t find my direction, I’m all alone The only star that guided me was you How to rise from the floor When it’s not you I’m rising for? Just do the next right thing   Take a step, step again It is all that I can do The next right thing   I won’t look too far ahead It’s too much for me to take But break it down to this next breath, this next step This next choice is one that I can make   So I’ll walk through this night Stumbling blindly toward the light And do the next right thing   And, with it done, what comes then? When it’s clear that everything will never be the same again Then I’ll make the choice to hear that voice And do the next right thing[1]  

 These are the words Anna sings, as she continues to cry, as she finds a way to climb out of the pit towards a sliver of light. This is the song, the drive, that compels Anna to wake the sleeping giants, almost being crushed herself in the process; this is the theme that gives Anna the strength to stand up to her own people, who try to stop her – the power that assures Anna that there is something more important than protecting the status quo. Sometimes, all you can do is the next right thing: even when it’s hard, even when you’ve lost everything, even when it means sacrificing what little you have left, even when it breaks your heart: take the next step, and do the next right thing.

 Anna becomes the hero again, because Anna is willing to sacrifice for the sake of love and for the sake of what’s right. And she learns that loving doesn’t just mean holding on, but loving sometimes means letting go.

 And Anna – the younger sister, the sister with no magic, drooling, snotty, awkward Anna – Anna finds the courage to do the next right thing.

 The story has a happy ending of course, because it’s a Disney movie. But Anna doesn’t know she’s in a Disney movie any more than David knew he was in the bible when he faced down Goliath, or Mary and Martha, the sisters of Lazarus, knew that they were in the gospels, or Paul and Silas knew they’d escape the dungeons when they decided to go ahead and sing.

 Anna doesn’t know. She herself admits: I can’t look that far ahead – it’s too much; it’s too hard to see, too overwhelming. But what I do know is the next right thing.

 These days, we have so many excuses not to do the next right thing – whether it’s standing up for the kids who’s being bullied, or speaking up when our friends make an inappropriate joke, or restructuring our health system so no one goes bankrupt because they get sick, or redistributing wealth so no one goes hungry in the richest nation on earth, or making education affordable, or taking climate change seriously – we have lots of excuses: if I speak up, I might be bullied, too; if we change things, it might hurt the economy, it might change the way I live my life, it might mean we have to make sacrifices and it will be uncomfortable and it will be hard.

 But it’s still right. And we are always called to do the next right thing.

 We stand at the beginning of a whole new year. We know that there are challenges to face this year, and they can seem so very overwhelming: looming war, a church-wide schism, a planet that is literally burning, the continued struggle to face down systemic violence and injustice, and speak up for our neighbors and for all creation, and we can’t help but realize just how far we still have to go – as Anna says, “It’s too much for me to take. But break it down to this next breath, this next step, this next choice is one that I can make.”

 We can’t do everything. But we can take the next step. One breath, one step, one choice at a time, friends, let’s choose to do the next right thing.

   God, we thank you: we thank you for your willingness to face the Garden of Gethsemane for our sake; we thank you for joining us in the shadow of death and pit of despair. We thank you for your voice, which whispers in our hearts, calling us forward, guiding us towards the next right thing. Give us the courage to get up; give us the strength to speak the truth even through our tears; help us to face the difficult stories of our own past; help us, always, to do the next right thing. In Jesus’ name we pray; amen.

[1] The Next Right Thing written by Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Robert Lopez © Walt Disney Music Company.