#she gets REALLY riled up looking for th results she wants. she talks like she hates it but shes obviously having fun + keeps doing it

[trainingdummyrabbit]

OH SHIT i never put chun-run over here even though i talked abt her ages ago, consider this beastie Instantly

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Knight in Shining Red Armor | Dante + Child!Reader (DMC 4)

A/N: Hey so this is a rewrite of one of my first (and only) DMC fic from like...2016. This takes place post-DMC 4

You can read the og one on my DeviantArt! But if you're here for the new one then I hope ya'll enjoy!

Summary: Child!Reader was taken under Dante's wing after being saved from a demon invasion, but even years later he hesitates to tell them what he truly is, fearing they'll resent him for his demonic heritage.

............

"Hey, um..Dante?"

"What's up, kiddo?" The red-clad devil hunter asked, though he wasn't completely paying attention to you. Rather he was sitting at his desk, feet kicked up as he was flipping through a magazine.

Meanwhile you were roaming around the shop, stopping only to gaze at the massive curved sword with glowing gems hanging on the wall behind him. He mentioned claiming many weapons--"Devil Arms" as they were called--from defeated demons, but you were curious about their names.

"Just wondering..what's that sword behind you called?"

"The Sparda. It sealed the barrier between the Underworld and human world. Nero went through hell and back, quite literally, to return it to me, so don't even think about touching......it?"

Dante put the magazine down as he turned to see you holding the Sparda in your small hands. You smiled triumphantly, but stumbled a bit before the blade accidentally slammed into the wooden floor, making you wince.

"Oops."

Yet your little act amused him, as he chuckled and shook his head. "You're a little too young to go devil-hunting, I'm afraid. But maybe one day you will."

"And maybe you can help pay off Dante's debt, too." Trish lightly joked as she entered the room, taking the giant sword from you and putting it back on the wall.

Her words were responded by a groan from the male, who went back to reading.

"Whatcha reading?"

Dante slowly lowered the magazine to see you sitting on his desk, but he just snapped it shut and tossed it into the trash, out of your line of sight. "Nothing that eyes like yours gotta see."

"Okay....ooooooh, what's this briefcase?" Hopping off the desk, you ran over to Pandora and crouched down to poke the skull emblem.

"Pandora. That baby can turn into six hundred and sixty six different weapons, but...right now we only have access to seven." Now he was feeling like an exhausted teacher on a museum trip, trying to explain each exhibit to his hyper first graders--the exhibits being his Devil Arms.

Yet as you ran around asking him about more of them, he couldn't help but see his childhood-self reflected in you. Just full of energy and never-ending curiosity and optimism.

Yeah..he definitely saw the resemblance.

Eventually you decided to leave him be and dash off to your room.

And only then did Dante drop his smile, sighing as he put both feet back on the ground. He ran a hand through his hair before dragging it down the side of his face tiredly.

"You know..you'll have to tell them eventually." Trish reminded.

"How, though? That kid's afraid of all demons..hybrids or not. I'm pretty sure saying "oh by the way the guy who rescued you is actually half-demon" is gonna send 'em running, and...I can't risk that." He shook his head, gazing at the jukebox in the corner.

"But I think [y/n]'s old enough to comprehend the concept of not all demons being evil," Lady chimed in after overhearing the conversation. "Just give it to them straight and I'm sure they'll understand."

As much as Dante wanted to argue, he saw that she had a valid point. But he still worried...

How would you react?

It's been a few years since he saved you from a Mega Scarecrow, though it turned out that more demons invaded your neighborhood, slaughtering everyone you knew and loved. And as he took you back to the shop to patch you up, he could see the terror in your eyes, any traces of innocence long gone.

No child should have gone through such a tragedy.

A tragedy that he was all-too familiar with.

After the defeat of the Savior, things have been looking up. You've regained your happiness as you lived in Devil May Cry and learned of Dante's tales of devil hunting, though the memories of that horrible night never truly left you alone.

Along with that, just seeing a demon is enough to make you run and hide, and you were terrified when you first met Nero and saw his demonic arm.

From that incident alone, Dante became extremely reluctant to tell you of his own demonic heritage.

He just didn't know if he's only hurting you more by keeping it hidden..

...............

Later that night, you were plagued by yet another nightmare. Different demons, same neighborhood...same deaths of your loved ones.

But in this one Dante got hurt, too. And you tried so hard to be brave for him, even shouting in the demon's face...but in the end you failed as it snatched you away, dragging you into the darkness of the Underworld before he could reach you.

Although you calmed down since awakening, you wanted to be sure he was alright.

So with what little moonlight shone in the shop's darkness, you located the worn sofa where Dante laid. He was engrossed in some TV program, though after sensing your presence his eyes flickered to you.

No words had to be exchanged in order for him to see what was wrong, as he sat up and patted the spot beside him. You smiled in relief and climbed onto the sofa, snuggling into his side as he wrapped an arm around you. "Th-Thanks, Dante."

"No prob. So uh..another nightmare, I guess?"

"Yeah, but..they hurt you, too and...I-I tried staying brave. I shouted at them to leave you alone and..they didn't listen. But...I think one of them looked scared of me."

"Wow." He raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Gotta say I'm impressed."

"Really?"

"Absolutely. Y'know demons are used to seeing kids scream and cry, not take a stand against them. Plus that's pretty epic of you to defend me, so thanks." With a smile, he ruffled your hair.

"You're welcome," you giggled a bit. "But..I really just wanna be as brave as you. I mean...Nero says you laugh at giant demons and tease them all the time. How do you do that without being scared?"

"Well..it comes with the business. Getting them riled up just makes the fight more fun. At least for me. You might think I'm crazy but if ya decide to hunt demons one day...you'll see what I mean."

"But until then, could I watch you fight one? Like a big bad one?"

"......."

"Dante?"

"..kid, there's a reason I never took you on any missions." Dante sighed, swallowing back the growing lump in his throat as he carefully planned his next words. "And how I always...bounce back from getting smacked by a demon tail. No human would be able to withstand that without some broken bones."

"Oh?" You tilted your head. "Then..how can you if you're human?"

"....because I'm not fully human."

As much as he wanted to shut up, he decided to tell you the truth once and for all, not sugarcoating anything:

He explained how his parents were a demon and human--a forbidden romance which resulted in himself and Virgil being born. His bloodline allowed them to blend in with humans, exercise their demonic abilities in battle, and even tap into their true demon forms.

All the while you listened silently, with not much emotion on your face. So it was hard for him to tell what you were probably thinking in this moment.

It scared him.

"...and that's it." He sighed, closing his eyes and looking away from you. "So go ahead and hate me if you want. I won't blame you for-"

"Can you show me?"

Dante blinked stupidly as he swung his head back towards you, wondering if he heard you right.

"I...wish you told me before, but I don't wanna be scared of demons anymore." You smiled a tiny bit as you elaborated. "Especially not one who helped me. So...can I see your other form?"

"...a-alright. Just...if you get scared I can turn back instantly, so don't freak."

"I won't."

He had doubts you'll keep your word, but he got up and activated his Devil Trigger form. As he opened his eyes, you gasped upon seeing how much they were glowing--being orange rather than blue. Red electric sparks danced around his metallic body as he observed you close, anticipating your reaction. He expected you to scream or cry.

Yet..there was only curiosity and wonder in your eyes.

"Scared yet?" He asked in his distorted voice, crouching down in front of you.

Not even the way he spoke startled you, as you just shook your head. "I was wrong all along..not all demons are bad."

"Not even this one?"

"Nope. You look awesome..like a knight in shiny red armor."

"...wow..I um...." For once, the talkative devil hunter was at loss for words. But when you learned forward to hug him around the neck, he was completely shocked.

Earlier in the day he thought of countless worse-case scenarios, and yet...the best-case was happening right now.

You were accepting him, hugging him even.

He couldn't believe it.

Dante smiled as he wrapped his arms around you, making sure his armor spikes didn't hurt you. "Thanks, kid. It really means a lot that you're not terrified anymore........[y/n]?" He was concerned about your lack of response, before realizing you were dozing off.

'Damn..I might make a pretty good dad, after all..' He mused, standing up and making the trek back to your bedroom. Then he set you down and tucked you in, relief and warmth in his heart.

He had a feeling that your nightmares won't be so bad anymore. Now he felt like he could truly protect you.

Why?

Because he was gonna be your knight in shining red armor.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Jeez, man. Quit clanking around shit and---AH!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!!"

"Shhhh! Chill out, Nero. You'll wake 'em." Dante was quick to shift back to his human form once he was outside your room, glaring at his nephew. "Why are you so freaked out? This ain't the first time you've seen my devil form."

"But still..why in the middle of the night?! Thought we had company."

"...just go back to bed, kid."

"Don't call me kid!"

[ravenadottir]

What do you think Kassam’s route would have been like if he had been one of the og boys, and how would his character have developed

my guy, i think i had a braingasm the moment i saw this ask! this is such a cool galaxy brain question, i can’t even...

‘cause i think so much about the possibility of kassam as an og, it’s actually ridiculous!! but in order to put him on day 1, i would have to put one of the boys in casa amor, and i’m choosing gary. that’s because lottie is gonna take interest in kassam right away. let me organize these thoughts in order of happenings in the villa...

♪ when mc steps outside, he’s lowkey interested, but he keeps his hands behind his back, only giving her a nod, accompanied by a smirk, when she says hi.

♪ “if any of you fancy me, please step forward.” kassam would be discreetly stepping forward, shooting her a neutral look, since he doesn’t want to come across as desperate, but a wink is also happening.

♪ “why did you step forward, kassam?” “i think we’re gonna hit it off, and you seem like a real sound girl.” bobby would say something like “ha! get it, because he’s a dj!” and laugh, but the prickly boy wouldn’t even look at him, focusing on mc.

♪ if mc chose to couple up with him, he would stand by her side, whispering his conversation, slightly analyzing the other boys.

♪ when lottie struts out, not gonna lie, he’s gonna think she’s attractive, but maybe a little intimidating. i do believe if she stole him (which i very much want to do here, since it’s an o.g kassam route), he’ll be standing next to her, but glancing at mc’s direction.

♪ the truth or dare challenge would probably be the opportunity to send him the picture, but if mc decided to kiss her partner i think that would “scare” kassam a bit. just because i don’t think he’s into p.d.a.

♪ he would have a lot of trouble relating/talking to anyone, because he automatically hates rocco, and for sure has some issues with how much rocco and bobby talk. which leads me to believe he would be closer to noah and ibrahim. (IT’S SO FREAKY TO THINK ABOUT THAT!!).

♪ priya is still gonna steal mc’s partner, which is not a big deal because she’s more interested in kassam than anyone else.

♪ kassam having more time in the villa means he’s also gonna open up to mc, eventually, and i think that’s what i wanted the most in casa amor. something to make us understand why he’s been closed up and extremely on edge at all times, like having the ear tick, the nerves, the quietness, if there’s anything to be talked about, mc would be person he would go to.

♪ music is probably what helps him relax, and right now he’s deprived of that, in every instance, so if the game wanted me to pay gems to bang some pots and do the glasses’ rim trick with him, i would a hundred percent be paying for that!

♪ bobby being musical himself would definitely blossom a connection between them. something that would make him a little fonder of cake boy. “i was wrong to judge you so fast, i guess.” and this could’ve been the “rap gang” throwback to season 1, having kassam doing beats, bobby doing the harmony, probably ibrahim rapping nonsense along with mc, and getting weird lines out of it! i would pay gems every time, i don’t care how much that would cost!

♪ as the recoupling approaches, kassam says he wants to couple up with us, but because bobby and he weren’t so close, the pastry chef has no idea of the dj’s intentions, proceeding to pick us.

♪ bobby’s choice forces kassam to choose between marisol and hannah, and going for the law student would be the obvious pick. but so much more awkward than gary’s was, because kassam wouldn’t try to hide the fact that he’s into someone else.

♪ marisol and kassam would be a friendship couple from the get go, because they have nothing in common, and that would probably make marisol realize her attraction towards rocco earlier.

♪ i do believe kassam would’ve been a cheeky sort, not the type that gary is, but definitely sneaking around to steal a kiss or two. “i don’t know what’s happening to me. i wouldn’t usually do this...” he smiles, almost not noticing it. “... but i feel close to you... it’s weird...”

“wow, kassam, thanks...”

“no, no i don’t mean like that... i’m just not used to it. you’re not the weird part of all this.”

“and what is?”

“me...” he proceeds to laugh uncomfortably.

♪ twitter bingo would have a fact about him, possibly a secret kiss, but it’s not revealed who he had it with.

♪ mr. love island. his “swimsuit” portion would be similar to lucas’, flexing his arms once he gets out of the pool, direct advice from noah, rahim and bobby. his talent would definitely include music in, possibly doing those beatbox tricks with two or three layers of sound... maybe even the low bass voice, which it’s honestly... SO FUCKING HOT. it would be a tough competition. between ibrahim doing the rubik’s cube trick shirtless, and kassam doing this... i don’t think noah or bobby would stand a chance!

♪ roccosol is still happening, and kassam is baffled by how much lottie is lying through her teeth, and shouting about the matter, since she was already talking to him behind rocco’s back. remember the welcome party for lucas and henrik? which would also mean kassam doesn’t take much heat from food/drinks, and that’s funny to me, for some reason!

♪ i do think instead of rahim, kassam would’ve been voted as “least dateable/leaving the show with a girlfriend. not endangered like lucas/henrik/rocco, but definitely voted. mc having the opportunity of the firepit conversation would end up in a kiss, and the angst is just taken on a new level!

♪ the date with him, before the recoupling on day 9, would be the chance we have to get to know him better, maybe having him tell us an embarrassing story about a gig he had. and if it was an ex’s story, even better! we don’t have that from him.

♪ hideaway scene, after the girls’ choice, would have him slightly less confident than he usually is. “i’m really excited to be here with you, i just don’t know exactly what to do.”

“i mean, if you don’t know, i don’t think i can get a biology book here.”

he would probably chuck a pillow in your direction and laugh at your joke. “i’m just nervous, i guess... i’m not used to feeling nervous around girls.”

♪ now! here’s the tricky part of the whole villa plotline in his route. operation nope. if mc went with it, he would end things, loudly and clearly, because he cannot stand betrayal, much less coming from the girl he spent so many days chasing. and he would probably advise MC to tell hope about it before it happened. kassam should be the type that breaks up with you and don’t want you back, later. i would definitely program him to act like that!

♪ drama to him is pointless, especially if it involves other people. he doesn’t see why people are being so out there about things, and definitely doesn’t understand why his girl has to be the one to solve everything. “i understand they’re upset but it’s not your job to fix it.”

♪ chelsea coming in, along with jakub, would irritate him to the extreme. the bomb she drops about him and lottie would have everyone riled up. YES, I WANT KASSAM TO KISS LOTTIE. they were coupled up before and he thinks she’s hot, besides the fact he was insecure about mc being picked by bobby. similar plot line to gary’s, except he might say something like “i had to know if there was anything there.” i really want him to explain himself here, but with short words: “we were coupled up just an hour before the recoupling. i wanted to make sure there was nothing there.”

“and...?” mc asks, staring at him.

he glances at lottie, shrugging. “there isn’t.”

♪ as revenge, mc would go on the date with jakub, resulting in kassam being apprehensive when it comes to talk about his feelings to her. and very angry and jealous, because that’s just who he is!

♪ the news about the recoupling arrive the night priya and hope are having that big fight, and yes, the bathroom scene happens with kassam, but he’s one of the boys that say the line “i want this to mean something to you”.

♪ disaster recoupling gets you both angry, and kassam would, for the first time, raise his voice, questioning jakub and the boy who steals mc. no, he wouldn’t be like the others and only question jakub or no one. at that point, everything is working against him, and just two days after mc finds out about the secret kiss, this is throwing him into a spiral of stress.

♪ casa amor gets everyone pissed off, and everything stays the same, except you get gary instead of kassam, and he’s interested in lottie and mc. (maybe the unicorn route wouldn’t happen). but casa days would’ve been way more interesting because now marisol and lottie are interested in the same guy! and in some cases, mc as well lol NOW, THAT WOULD’VE MADE CASA INTERESTING!

♪ cheeky the way gary is, he’s probably trying to stick with one girl by suggesting a kiss, sharing the bed and etc, but if mc is not interested in him, lottie would probably be torn about bringing him back or not, and marisol would get confused between gary and graham, proceeding to focus on fish boy, later.

♪ coming back from casa amor, kassam is single, and you get bean bags conversation, only with him he says how anxious he was for mc to come back. “i’m just... really glad you’re here. i...” he stammers a bit. “i missed you.”

“did you miss lottie too?” mc would raise her brows, slightly irritated.

“no, of course not! i missed...” realizing she’s being prickly, just like him, he continues. “har, har... very funny.”

“i didn’t think it was funny finding out you kissed her.”

“i wouldn’t think that either... i’m sorry i didn’t tell you.”

♪ the route is pretty much the same from there, except for a couple of moments:

one: the conversation we have with gary, by the pool, is held by kassam, and he talks about anxiety, and how that affected his relationships in the past. he didn’t know how much he missed out because he was too afraid of taking the leap, and he’s glad he’s in a better place now. also, talking about therapy and mental illness in the same tone gary did, with body issues.

two: he would make a comment of how excited he is to write songs about mc, and how much he has been thinking of his journey and the album he’s gonna dedicate to his time there.

♪ asking mc to be his girlfriend would go a little differently, since he’s not the blob of characterization he normally becomes in the game.

♪ he would continue to be prickly, and sarcastic, but his journey would’ve taught him how to trust people more, and the improbable friendships he developed there would go to show just how much he’s opening up, and how it can only get better from there.

♪ his speech, at the prom, would include his friends, mentioning them as the support system he had in there, just like one of the girls do with mc. “my journey wouldn’t have been the same if it wasn’t for you lads. and despite the bad advice i got, i guess everything worked out in the end.”

i really think kassam deserved a spot in the og’s line up, mostly because of how different he is from the other boys. he would probably have a brief friendship with lucas if the physiotherapist stayed, too.

hope this is what you were looking for. thank you so much for this ask!

[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior 10/16/20: SYNCHRONIC, FRENCH EXIT, TRIAL OF THE CHICAGO 7, LOVE AND MONSTERS, HONEST THIEF, THE KID DETECTIVE and More!

After the last couple weeks, I really need a break, which is why I’m writing most of this in transit to Columbus, Ohio to see my mother, sister and all (or some) of the friends that I made during my sabbatical to the city seven years ago for cancer treatment.

On, and look... Variety wrote about the movie theater chains and NATO lobbying Governor Cuomo to reopen movie theaters, showing that there’s been no proof of any cases leading back to movie theaters. (And more from The Hollywood Reporter…) New York leads and the world follows? More like ED leads and the world follows. Been saying this shit for months now and putting up with all sorts of needless abuse for it.

This week’s “Featured Flick” is actually a movie coming to theaters on October 23, but since I’m not sure I’m writing a column next week, I’m gonna review it this week! Cool?  The movie is SYNCHRONIC (Well Go USA), and it’s the follow-up to Aaron Moorehead and Justin Benson’s amazing sci-fi film The Endless from a few years back. This ome stars Anthony Mackie and Jamie Dornan as parademics in New Orleans who have been coming across a series of bodies that have died in gruesome ways, all connected by a designer drug they were all taking.

I’ll just say right from the start that I loved almost everything about this movie from the amazing performances by Mackie and Dornan to the entire look and tone of the movie, which shows the duo taking huge steps forward as filmmakers, particularly Benson as a screenwriter. Unfortunately, I’m not sure what I can say about the movie and its plot without spoiling other’s enjoyment. I will say that it involves a designer drug and time travel and Mackie’s character has something odd about his brain that makes him better suited to figure out what is happening to the victims than others might be. Also, Dornan’s character Dennis has family issues, particularly with his daughter Brianna (Ally Ioannides), who disappears mysteriously, but it’s so nice seeing Katie Aselton as Dennis’ wife, as well as in another movie out this week.

I’ll also say that people who watch this movie will inevitably make comparisons to the work of Alex Garland and maybe even the more-versed ones might see a little of David Cronenberg’s Videodrome in the film’s trippy nature. The thing is that the movie is super-smart, and it’s obvious that Moorehead and Benson must have done a lot of research to make every aspect of it feel authentic. It’s just amazing what this duo can do with a small fraction of the money that Christopher Nolan had to make Tenet, and yet, they can create a complex and unique premise that’s actually easy to understand. Things like the camerawork, the music and sound design all add to the amazing tone and the mood that the duo have created.

I also think it’s Mackie’s best role and performance in many years, maybe even going back to The Hurt Locker, so as a long-time fan, I’m glad he connected with Moorehead/Benson to show that he’s more than capable of leading a movie like this.

Again, Synchronic will be in movie theaters and drive-ins NEXT Friday, October 23, but I want to give you an advance heads up, because Synchronic is likely to be the most original sci-fi or genre film you see this year. If you can’t get to the drive-in and don’t feel comfortable going to a movie theater, then I’m sure it will be on digital soon enough, but you definitely shouldn’t miss it!

Next up is Aaron Sorkin’s THE TRIAL OF THE CHICAGO SEVEN, streaming on Netflix starting Friday and the movie I was most looking forward to seeing this week. I was such a huge fan of Brett Morgen’s Chicago 10 documentary, which opened Sundance in 2007, especially with how he recreated the court trials using animation and a talented roster of voice actors including Hank Azaria, Mark Ruffalo and Geoffrey Wright. Sorkin has just as an impressive list of actors for his version, including Mark Rylance, Eddie Redmayne, Sacha Baron Cohen, Frank Langella, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and many more.

If you don’t know about the protests outside the 1968 Democratic National Convention in Chicago – you see, back in those days, the Democrats were the bad guys… how times have changed!! Those protests led to a number of arrests but a few years later, the federal government charged a number of individuals with inciting the riot. The accused include Black Panther leader Bobby Seale, played by Yahya Abdul-Mateen II from Aquaman and Watchmen, Abbie Hoffman (Cohen), FBI agent Tom Hayden (Eddie Redmayne), Jerry Rubin (Jeremy Strong), David Dellinger (John Carroll Lynch) and two more. The six white guys are defended by Mark Rylance’s William Kunstler, who faces the tough Judge Hoffman (Langella) who is not putting up with any guff from these young revolutionaries.

All of the characters are quickly introduced with a quick-cut opening montage with actual newsreel footage, but then we’re quickly moved to a meeting to the Attorney General (Keaton) with the trial’s prosecutor (Gordon-Levitt). From there, we’re right into the trial about 16 minutes into the movie, although Sorkin frequently cuts back to the actual day of the Chicago protest to recreate what happened as testimony is given. Probably the part that will have the most impact and resonance is the way Seale was mistreated compared to the others, getting so riled up at the judge that the judge orders him chained and gagged. The trial would end up taking place for almost 7 months even though the results were eventually overturned.

This really is perfect material for Sorkin, and maybe if I hadn’t seen Chicago 10 first, I would have been a lot more fascinated by the trial sequences, though Morgen did an equally great job working from the transcripts. Basically, what happened happened. Where Sorkin’s screenplay and film excels is showing what’s going on outside the courtroom, whether it’s the recreations or just conversations taking place between the plaintiffs.  As might be expected from Sorkin, the screenplay is great with lots of fast talking, making for a movie that moves at a kinetic pace for its two hours.

If I had to pick a few of the best performances, I’d probably focus on Cohen’s Abbie Hoffman, which is more than just an accent, he and Strong’s Rubin bantering back and forth like a seasoned Vaudeville act; Rylance’s Kunstler is spot-on, and Langella is just great as the crusty judge, the film’s only true antagonist. I also appreciated John Carroll Lynch and in fact, all the performances, although I felt that with so many characters, Sorkin wasn’t able to give Bobby Seale the time his story truly needed. Still, I would be shocked if this isn’t considered a SAG Ensemble frontrunner.

Ultimately, The Trial of the Chicago 7 is a fine recreation of a certain moment in history that still feels relevant and timely fifty years later, even if it’s so heavy at times you either need to focus or, like me, watch it on Netflix in two sittings. I still liked Steve McQueen’s movie Mangrove that takes place in a similar era and also culminates in a trial just a little bit better.

Before we get to the rest of this week’s new movies, I have one last review from the New York Film Festival, and it’s the closing night film, FRENCH EXIT, from director Azazel Jacobs and writer Patrick Dewitt, who has adapted his own book. The film stars Michelle Pfeiffer as Frances Price, a Manhattan widow from wealth who discovers she has no more money, just as her son Malcolm (Lucas Hedges with longer hair than usual) has decided to marry his girlfriend Susan (Imogen Poots) though he hasn’t told his mother that yet. With no other options, Francis takes her son on a ship to live in Paris for a while at the home of one Mme. Renard (Valarie Mahaffey), an elderly woman who is a genuine fan of Francis and welcomes them as her guests.

This is one of those ensemble character dramedies that I wouldn’t even be able to begin to tell you why you should see it unless you miss seeing Pfeiffer in a semi-decent performance, but one that doesn’t do much as the film itself is so boring and insufferably pretentious most of the time I’m not sure I can even recommend it for that.

Jacobs and Dewitt previous made the movie Teri maybe ten years ago, and I was never really a fan, so I’m not sure why I thought that Dewitt adapting his own book would bear better results.  Once Frances and Malcolm get to Paris, there’s just an influx of odd characters who show up, some who have more impact than others. I liked seeing Danielle Macdonald as a psychic medium the duo meet on the ship across the Atlantic who Malcolm bonks. She’s brought back when Frances wants her to conduct a séance to communicate with her late husband who she thinks is now inhabiting an omni-present cat. Like everything else, the relationship between Malcolm and Susan and how that’s affected by her meeting a new guy just never goes anywhere.

For the most part, the whole thing is just dull and uninteresting, and so pretentious it never really leads to anything even remotely memorable. I have no idea why the New York Film Festival would decide to close with this one. (Although the 58th NYFF is over, some of the movies will hit its Virtual Cinema soon, so keep an eye out! For instance, this Friday, FilmLinc begins a Pietro Marcello retrospective as well as showing his latest film Martin Eden in FilmLInc’s Virtual Cinema.)

Liam Neeson stars in Mark Williams’ HONEST THIEF (Open Road), a crime-thriller in which he plays Tom Carter, the uncaught robber behind 12 bank robberies who decides to settle down with Kate (Grey’s Anatomy) Walsh’s Annie Wilkins, who he meets while renting a storage space to hide all the money he’s stolen. After a year of things getting serious with Annie, Tom decides to retire so he calls the FBI and says he’s ready to give back the 9 million, but two crooked FBI agents (one played by Jai Courtenay, the other by Anthony Ramos) decide they’re going to take the money instead. Their plan to steal the money Tom’s trying to return leads to a number of deaths, including putting Annie in the hospital. When that happens, Tom has had enough, and honestly, there’s no one better at getting revenge than Neeson. (Did we mention that Carter is ex-Marine? I mean, of course he is!)

Many will go into Honest Thief expecting the typical Neeson action revenge flick ala Taken or maybe one of his high-concept thrillers, but Honest Thief isn’t nearly that exciting. It starts out fairly slow and dry with no real crime or action elements, although Williams does throw them in from time to time. The whole thing is pretty dry, and it’s a good 54 minutes before we get to the revenge aspect of the story and that’s after a lot of bad decisions being made across the board. Anyone who is still wondering how Jai Courtney has a career won’t be changing that decision by his turn as the villain, and it’s a lot odd when the movie tries to make a sympathetic character out of his partner, played by Ramos.

Regardless, any elements that make Honest Thief unique from other Neeson action movies are quickly tossed aside for the same usual cliches, and the action scenes aren’t even that great. While Honest Thief may not be an awful or unwatchable movie, it’s probably not the action movie you might be expecting from Neeson – more like a bargain basement The Fugitive with one plot decision that almost kills the whole movie.

Delayed a number of times and now dumped to PVOD (with minimal theatrical) is Paramount’s LOVE AND MONSTERS, which is written by the prolific Bryan Duffield (The Babysitter, Spontaneous), directed by Michael Matthews and produced by Shawn Levy’s 21 Laps Entertainment. In the movie, Dylan O’Brien plays Joel Dawson, a young man surviving the apocalypse with a small community after the government’s plot to blast a couple asteroids heading to earth backfires. Instead, it creates giant, carnivorous monsters out of the earth’s animals who eliminate 95% of the earth’s human population. (We learn all of this through a Zombieland-like animated prequel getting us up to speed.)  Before the earth fell into disarray, Joel was in love with Jessica Henwick’s Aimee, but they were separated by the fateful events. Seven years later, they’re reconnected via radio and Joel has sworn to travel the 85 miles across the creature-covered wasteland to reunite with her. Hence, the title “Love and Monsters.” Get it?

I actually didn’t hate this movie, although it’s not really a family film or one meant for young kids, because it’s PG-13 for a reason, including mild violence i.e. people being chomped by monsters, and some sexuality. Dylan O’Brien does a decent job carrying it, but it relies just as much on the other people he meets, particularly Michael Rooker’s Clyde and his young ward Minnow, played by Ariana Greenblatt, the latter who is such a scene-stealer that it’s disappointing they’re only in the movie for a small chunk. They’re probably the funniest part of the movie.

I like giant monsters and these ones are certainly … interesting. They seem to have been toned down a bit maybe to be more kid-friendly, more like the kid-friend Godzilla than the terror we’ve seen in recent incarnations. There are also a number of great action set-pieces, and some good post-Apocalyptic ideas we haven’t seen, especially when Duffield’s dark sense of humor is able to come out and keep things fun.

Still, Love and Monsters is not a kids’ movie, and there’s something about it that might make people wish the filmmaker just went full-on R, because going further towards PG would have made even the best parts quite painful to get through. As it is, Love and Monsters is a suitably fine boy and his dog adventure – oh, did I mention the dog? – that would make a perfectly fine streaming movie.

We’ll get back to some of the other theatrical releases in a bit, but I wanted to get to two movies that were pleasant surprises, maybe because I went into them with absolutely zero expectations.

I wasn’t really sure what to think about Cooper Raiff’s SH#!%HOUSE (IFC Films) at first, maybe because it’s title is a little off-putting and not really particularly representative of what the movie is. Raiff himself plays Alex Malmquist, a fairly new arrival at his college but already missing home and his mother (Amy Landecker) and not really adjusting to the crazy college lifestyle as exemplified by his roommate Sam (Logan Miller). After a party at a frat called “Shithouse” (hence the title), Alex meets and connects with his dorm’s R.A. Maggie (Dylan Gelula) and the two spend the night bonding and hanging out.

Obviously, someone at IFC Films loves these platonic indie two-handers about people meeting and hanging out over the course of a night, because Shithouse is the second such movie after Olympic Dreams earlier in the year. They also must know that I’m a sucker for these kinds of semi-rom-coms, because just like with that other movie, I totally ate up everything Raiff was trying to do and say with his movie. The chemistry between the two leads is undeniable, and maybe it won’t be a surprise that Gelula also appeared in Raiff’s previous movie.

As with any relationship, things do come to an end, and this one crashes and burns in a very sad way for Alex the very next day. Maggie starts to pretend she doesn’t even know him, and she ignores his incessant texts saying how much he enjoyed their night together. Boy, I have been there back in my reckless and romantic days of youth.

At first, I wasn’t that into Raiff as an actor – remember what I’ve said about filmmakers casting themselves? – but Alex definitely grew on me. Gelula is absolutely amazing, and frankly, I can see someone “discovering” her in ten years and becoming a new Parker Posey, Kate Lynn Sheil or other similar indie ingenue.

The combination of the two is what makes Shithouse such a special experience, since their situations are quite relatable and Raiff does a great job with the characterization in his writing to make this quite enjoyable to see how things will resolve themselves.

I also wasn’t quite prepared for how much I’d enjoy Steve Byrne’s THE OPENING ACT (RLJEfilms), maybe because I was unfamiliar with Byrne, and as usual, I didn’t read the description of the movie before sitting down to watch it. If I did, I would have known that Byrne is a stand-up comic and presumably this movie is somewhat based on situations that have happened to him. It stars Jimmy O. Yang from Crazy Rich Asians (a great comic in his own right) as Willy Chu, a young comic who has always dreamed of making it in stand-up but instead, has been stuck trying to get slots at an open mic night, while holding down a day job working at an insurance company. One day, his friend (Ken Jeong) sets him up for an MC gig in Pennsylvania at the Improv where his idol Billy G (Cedric the Entertainer) will be performing, so Willy quits his job to pursue his dream.

Much of Byrne’s movie deals with Billy’s “adventure” in Pennsylvania with the club’s womanizing featured act (played by SNL’s Alex Moffatt) and trying to face the struggles of stand-up in hopes of getting to the next level. There have been better movies about the subject, like Mike Birbiglia’s Sleepwalk with You, but Byrne’s film is a nice addition, particularly because Yang plays such a likeable, benevolent character you want to see him do well even after he crashes and bombs on a Saturday night and is at risk of losing the Improv gig.

It’s obvious that Byrne pulled in a lot of favors from friends to get such a great cast of comics – even getting Whitney Cumming to make a cameo – but the likes of Bill Burr actually take on key roles, like Willy’s boss in that case. Moffatt is particularly hilarious expanding on some of his outrageous SNL characters to play a stand-up who actually does help Willy, even as he puts him in pretty awful situations. Cedric also gives another fantastic performance as Willy’s idol who gives him the cold shoulder at first but eventually comes around and offers him the mentoring that Willy needs.

The Opening Act isn’t anything particularly revelatory, but it is thoroughly entertaining, and a nice little indie that I hope people will discover for themselves, especially those who like (or perform) stand-up.

Edward James Olmos directs THE DEVIL HAS A NAME (Momentum Releasing) starring the great Oscar-nominated David Strathairn as almond farmer Fred Stern, who has been running his orchard for three decades with trusty second Santiago, played by Olmos himself. Things are going well until they notice that some of the trees are rotting. It turns out they’re being poisoned by the water that’s been sullied by crude oil run-off from the nearby Shore Oil rigs. Around the same time, an opportunist named Alex Gardner, played by Haley Joel Osment, offers Fred a very low-ball offer to buy the farm, though Fred suspects something is up, and sure enough, Shore Oil is responsible.

Another movie I didn’t know what to expect other than a few cursory elements is this movie “based on a true story” movie about the little farmer taking on “The Man.” In this case, Shore Oil is represented by Kate Bosworth’s Gigi Cutler, a tough exec. at the corporation who thinks their lawyers (one of them played by Katie Aselton!) can crush this local troublemaker. When Stern’s lawyer (Martin Sheen) sues the oil company for 2 billion, they need to start taking things seriously, bringing in a tough “fixer” played by Pablo Schreiber.

I’m not sure where to begin with this movie that certainly has noble intentions in telling this story but suffers from quite a few issues, mostly coming from the script. I was a little concerned once I knew the premise, because I was not a huge fan of Todd Haynes’ Dark Water from last year, although I did enjoy the Krasinski-Damon-Van Sant ecological venture, Promised Land. This one falls somewhere in between, and probably its biggest issue is that it tries to create some humor out of the erratic behavior of the characters played by Bosworth and Schreiber; both performances are so off-the-rails at times it regularly takes you out of Fred’s story. (Osment is also pretty crazy but at least he fits better into his role.) Strathairn is great and well-cast, and Olmos is equally good, and I imagine that it’s partially because many of their scenes are together, allowing Olmos to direct with his acting. Aselton and Sheen are also decent, especially in the courtroom scenes.

Oh, and did I mention that Alfred Molina plays the Big Boss, who is interrogating Cutler as a needless framing device? Yeah, there’s a lot of characters, and when you hold this up against something like The Trial of Chicago 7, it’s just obvious that the film has too many elements for any filmmaker to be able to juggle at once.

Because of this, The Devil Has A Name is an erratic real-life dramedy that’s too all over the place in terms of tone, it ends up shooting itself in the foot by trying (and failing) to be funny despite the serious subject matter.

Next up is 2 HEARTS (Silver Lion Films/ Freestyle Releasing), another movie based on a true story from the Hool Brothers, who I really wasn’t very familiar with. I assumed this was going to be a faith-based movie, and maybe in some ways it is, but not really. It essentially tells two stories set in different time periods that you assume will somehow be connected. Ooh, boy.

First, there’s Jacob Elordi of Euphoria and The Kissing Booth – neither of which I’ve seen, mind you – who plays Chris Gregory, a college kid who connects in a meet-cute way with Tiera Skovbye’s Sam. Before we get too far into their story, we cut back to what looks like Cuba in the ‘50s and 60s, and meet Jorge Bolivar (Adan Canto), the son of an alcohol magnate, a soccer player who suffers a serious lung issue that puts him in the hospital. Years later, Jorge is travelling to Miami when he meets Radha Mitchell’s Leslie working as a flight attendant.

Both guys are pretty suave smooth-talking pick-up artists, and the movie spends almost an hour cutting between two very corny and cheesy romance stories that really don’t offer much in terms of story. Instead, it keeps following Chris and Sam’s life as they have kids, taking forever to get to the connection between the stories. I was getting pretty bored of the movie, but I felt like I had to stick it out to see what happens.

When you call a movie “2 Hearts,” you kind of expect it to be about a heart transplant of some kind, right? But no, it’s actually about a dual lung transplant that Jorge receives. Want to take a wild guess who the donor is?  I certainly don’t want to spoil what happens, but for a movie that spends a good hour setting up the relationships between the two men and their pretty blondes with ups and downs that makes it seem like a Nicholas Sparks movie, it really throws a spanner into the fairy tale with all the melodrama that’s to come. It’s such a whiplash in terms of tone it pretty much destroys any chance of one enjoying the movie for what it is. It also loses a lot without Elordi, since the actors who play his family aren’t very good at all.

I had to actually look up the story to see how much if it was true, only to learn that Jorge was based on Jorge Bacardi who actually received a double lung transplant from one Christopher Gregory, inspiring him to create the Gabriel House of Care. The problem is that the time periods get so messed up by setting one story decades in the past. Using the same actors to play the people over that time with pretty shabby make-up just makes things that much more confusing. The big problem is that it spends so much time avoiding the actual plot and point of making the movie that by the time it gets to it, you just don’t care about the characters anymore.

The whole thing is very by the books and predictable, but ultimately, it’s hard to believe any of it, despite it being based on a true story. If you go into this movie expecting love and romance and all that kind of mushy stuff from the title, you’re likely to be disappointed when the movie finally gets to its point. (In other words, it could have used some giant monsters.)

Here’s another movie that I didn’t really know what to expect going in and that probably should have helped me enjoy it more… if it was anything resembling a good movie. Picked up at the Toronto Film Festival where it premiered last month, Evan Morgan’s THE KID DETECTIVE (Sony) stars Adam Brody as Abe Appelbaum, the “kid detective” of the titles, who as a child was one of those super-smart kids who have the deductive powers to help the people in his community, but as a 32-year-old, he just isn’t taken as seriously any more. When a high school girl named Caroline (Sophie Nélisse) comes to Abe to find out who murdered her boyfriend, Abe finally realizes that he has his first grown-up case, though he’s still obsessed with the disappearance of the mayor’s daughter (and his kid receptionist) Gracie many years earlier.

I’m sure there’s gonna be people out there who watch and appreciate The Kid Detective for what it is, a wry and slightly clever noir pastiche pseudo-comedy, but anyone who has seen Rian Johnson’s first film Brick or the underrated Mystery Team (starring Donald Glover very early in his career) might feel that this doesn’t live up to either. Besides the fact that Brody really hasn’t developed much personality as an actor, the film rolls along with a fairly flat, deadpan tone that just never gets remotely exciting. The humor is subdued and yet it feels like everyone is constantly trying too hard, particularly Morgan, while at the same time not really taking any chances. This is a movie that could have been edgier but instead, it milks its flimsy high-concept premise as long as possible before giving up.

Like Love and Monsters, Sony is releasing The Kid Detective into theaters on Friday, and hopefully parents will check that rating before assuming it’s a kid flick. Although there isn’t so much bad language or anything that wouldn’t warrant a PG… other than the fact that it’s not particularly funny or even entertaining and kids will be super-bored.

I can’t believe there’s still more! Amazon’s “Welcome to the Blumhouse” anthology series continues this week with two more movies in the series of eight, which you can now watch on Prime Video:

Easily my favorite of the four movies I’ve seen is Zu Quirke’s NOCTURNE (Amazon), which follows a pair of twins, Julie (Sidney Sweeney) and Vivian (Madison Iseman), who are both competitive concert pianists at the Lindberg Academy, although Vivian is clearly the better, as she’s heading off to Julliard while Julian is taking a gap year.

Before we meet them, we see a young violist jumping off the balcony to her death for some reason, and we learn that she was the finalist to play a concerto, so now that slot is open and both Julie and her sister desperately want it.

Nocturne is certainly more like the horror movies we expect from Blumhouse, which is both good and bad. The good is that it is indeed quite scary as Quirke’s team uses really eerie lighting effects and other things to create suspense. But there’s also an artiness to what Quirke does that elevates Nocturne above the normal high-concept horror-thriller.

Quirke, who also wrote the film, delivers all the characterization you expect from a good horror film so that you really care about the characters, and she’s put together such a fine cast, particularly Sweeney who has to run a gamut of emotions as Julie. I also like Rodney To as Julie’s tough instructor Wilkins

Again, I won’t say too much more about the actual plot, although if you can imagine a Faustian bargain and how that plays out for those around Julie, you can probably understand why a super-fan of The Omen might dig what Quirke did in this environment.

The fourth movie in the “Welcome to the Blumouse” series is EVIL EYE (Amazon), from Indo-American filmmakers Elan and Rajeev Dassani, a relatively innocuous thriller based around the relationship between Pallavi (Sunita Mani from last week’s Save Yourselves! and GLOW) and her mother Usha, played by Sarita Choudhury.  Pallavi is in her late 20s and single and her mother keeps wanting to get her set-up with a nice man, as a good Indian mother is wont to do.  When Pallavi meets Sandeep (Omar Maskati), things are going well since he has money and her mother thinks her daughter has hit the jackpot, until she realizes that Sandeep has a dark secret.

Here’s another thriller where it’s really tough to talk about the plot, because obviously the filmmakers want the story to unfold in the specific way it was written. Apparently, this one was once an Audible story, and the first thing I noticed was how amazing Sunita Mani looks from her fairly glammed down roles in other things. I think she’s just wearing make-up and has her styled different but I’m not sure I would have known it was the same actor in Save Yourselves! Because I had to do a double take.

The problem with Evil Eye, and it’s been a problem with some of the other “Welcome to the Blumhouse” movies, is that it isn’t necessarily what I’d consider horror. It really plays a lot more like a romantic drama, other than the fact that Pallavi’s mother has visions and believes in astrology enough to send her daughter trinkets to protect her from the “evil eye.” In fact, the movie just gets weirder and weirder, as it starts introducing supernatural elements, and without giving the big plot twist away, it does expect one to believe in reincarnation.

I wish I could have liked this more, but it really seems like it would be better suited for a show like “The Outer Limits” or “The Twilight Zone,” since the premise is stretched so think for about 30 minutes longer than necessary.  I think the filmmakers did perfectly fine with what they had to work with – the two main actresses are just fab – but I think I’d need to see some of their other work to see if the issues I had were just cause the story isn’t that interesting or by their limitations in making it.

(And I promise that I do have a feature on all the filmmakers from the first four “Welcome to the Blumhouse” series coming over at Below the Line, but it’s been a pretty tough piece to write.)

I reviewed Alex Gibney’s new doc Totally Under Control (Neon/Participant), co-directed with Ophelia Harutyunyan and Suzanne Hillinger, in last week’s column but it’s now available to watch On Demand and then it will be on Hulu starting next Tuesday, October 20. Obviously, everyone wanted to get this out there and make sure people see it before they get too in-deep with the election.

I also reviewed David Byrne’s American Utopia (HBO), directed by Spike Lee, a few weeks back, but it will be on HBO and presumably HBO Max on Sunday night. Not as big an event as Disney+’s Hamilton but still worth watching, especially if you’re a fan of Byrne or his band the Talking Heads, because it actually acts as a nice counterpoint bookend to the late Jonathan Demme’s fantastic Stop Making Sense, one of the best concert documentaries ever made, or at least top 5. I’m bummed I missed Byrne’s show on Broadway, and it doesn’t sound like Broadway will be coming back anytime soon so I guess this HBO documentation is the best any of us can wish for.

Of the movies I didn’t have time to watch this week, the two that I’m hoping to still get to are two docs: Inna Blockhina’s SHE IS THE OCEAN (Blue Fox Entertainment) and Rick Korn’s HARRY CHAPIN: WHEN IN DOUBT, DO SOMETHING (Greenwich). She Is the Ocean explores the lives of nine women who all have a passion for the ocean. The Harry Chapin doc may be more self-explanatory, and I wish I was a bigger fan of Chapin, the famed singer/songwriter/activist, because maybe I would have watched this movie earlier. (But seriously, look at how many movies came out this week, when I was hoping it would be “slower”!) Also, I’m a little bit interested in the K-Pop doc #BlackPinkLightUpTheSky that will air on Netflix, just because, I dunno, I like adorable, young Asian women, so sue me?

Premiering on Disney+ this Friday is Justin Baldoni’s CLOUDS, starring Fin Argus as musician Zach Sobiech, who has only months to live when his cancer starts spreading, but he follows his dream to make an album and becomes a viral music phenomenon. I’m not sure if this is a true story but it certainly sounds a lot like a faith-based film called I Still Believe that hit theaters just before they all shut down due to the pandemic. Coincidence? I think not.

Also this week, the 32nd ANNUAL NEWFEST LGBTQ FILM FESTIVAL begins on Friday, running through October 27 with opening night being the well-regarded Ammonite, starring Kate Winslet and Saoirse Ronan, but it will be done as a drive-in, so I’m out. Over in Los Angeles, the AFI FEST starts on Thursday and runs through October 22, and that’s also showing a lot of cool festival/awards films that I haven’t had a chance to watch yet like The Father, I’m Your Woman and more. I missed my chance to get press accreditation, so yeah, I guess I’ll be waiting on that.

And then we get to all the movies that I didn’t have time to see or didn’t receive a screener, so here we go. This week’s unfortunate dumping ground:

Lupin III: The First (GKIDS) (This anime film is being released as a Fathom event on Oct. 18 – dubbed, and Oct. 21 – subtitled)

Belly of the Beast (I’ve actually heard good things about Erika Cohn’s doc about illegal sterilizations being conducted in a woman’s prison.)

Don’t Look Back (Gravitas Ventures)

Rom Boys: 40 Years of Rad (101 Films)

The Antidote (Cinetic/Brand New Story)

Monochrome: The Chromism (Tempest)

J.R “Bob” Dobbs and the Church of the Subgenius (Uncork’d)

Monster Force Zero (WildEye Releasing)

Ghabe (GVN Releasing)

The Accidental President (Intervention)

In Case of Emergency (Kino Lorber)

I’m not sure how much of a column I’m gonna write next week since I won’t have nearly as much time to watch movies or write about them in the coming week, while I’m in Colmbus. There are a couple high profile movies I hope to get to, so we’ll see what happens.

By the way, if you read this week’s column and have bothered to read this far down, feel free to drop me some thoughts at Edward dot Douglas at Gmail dot Com or drop me a note or tweet on Twitter. I love hearing from readers … honest!

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Oppa Knows Best | Part 2

Word Count: 4.3k Genre: Smut, Angst Summary:  If there is anything a lot of people can agree on when it comes to college, it’s that college is about much more than just education; it’s a whole transformative experience.  The person you were before college is not the same person you will be after college, and no one knows the truth of that statement quite like you do. You just didn’t expect to change so much so fast. Chapter Plot: You go back on your promise to Jaehyun, or at least you try to, only to you find out just what he’s willing to do to stop you from sleeping around.  Warnings: This story contains a very unbalanced power dynamic between the two main characters that is unhealthy and shouldn’t be tolerated irl. If someone treats you this way irl please run. This is a fictional story and the plot is basically just a vehicle for the smut. Contains slutshaming and controlling behavior. Also the dirty talk is painfully corny and pornolike so be warned lol. Oppa kink if it wasn’t obvious. Not as edited as it should be rip me  Part 1 and the rest of my masterlist are in my bio bec tumblr is a dick

It’s been a month since your drunken tryst with Jaehyun. You never got the chance to confront him about it, not really anyway. After that chastity agreement he had roped you into, any hope you might’ve had about finally coming clean to him about your feelings was completely dashed to the ground. Unlike the fanciful dreams that dominated your hours of your sleep that night—few but seeming to stretch on forever in your dreamscape of rainbow love and fairy dust—Jaehyun wasn’t interested in a relationship with you—not romantic, not sexual. You had stood there that morning in your new room, after all your stuff had been moved there, with your face cradled between Jaehyun’s hands and his body almost flush with your own, as he sucked you into another one-sided conversation. “Listen, I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have acted out that way. I should be protecting you, not the one hurting you. Please forgive me.” He had entreated, looking glum and downtrodden, thoroughly disappointed in himself. You wanted to tell him that there was nothing to forgive—on the contrary, last night was one of the happiest moments in your life. To touch him, to be one with him, was your longest-lasting dream, and he had given you that last night. You wanted to tell him that you didn’t regret it, but you’d only be exposing yourself to the man who obviously wasn’t on the same page as you.

“I was just so angry and drunk and I tried to prove my point in a really fucked up way. I crossed a line I never dreamed of crossing. I laid my hands on you, my little angel. I hurt you.” He had almost sobbed, clearly distressed and regretful. It broke your heart, because it hurt seeing him in pain, but more so because of the reason for it. In his inconsiderate view that you’re a child and it’s wrong for him to desire you, he deprives you of your own capacity to be a sexual being and have desires of your own for him.   “When you said that thing about not coming here if you had known I would act that way… fuck, that killed me. I couldn’t sleep. It’s all I can about, that I was so stupid that I let my anger put us in danger. I would never forgive myself if I was the reason I lost you. I’m so sorry.” He leaned down even closer to you, eyes boring into your soul and breath gently fanning over your lips in what would’ve been a thrilling prelude to a fiery kiss, if it weren’t for the fact that he was crushing your hopes at ever getting a kiss from him again at this very moment. “All I ever did was for you. Please understand that.” You felt like crying. This wasn’t the fairytale confession you’ve been dreaming of. It seemed foolishly asinine now, but last night you had actually got yourself to thinking you might have a chance with your childhood love. You convinced yourself that the reason he was so riled up was because he felt the same way about you and he got so jealous he couldn’t control himself, like the Tsundere male lead of a cringey drama. But there were no hidden motives behind his protectiveness, and you were left having to continue the scene alone and pretend that the tears that were now streaming down your face were the result of his brash actions last night and not the words he said trying to take them back now as he waited breathlessly for your response, hanging his life on your next words.   “Of course, oppa. I understand.”                                   •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• That had been the start and end of your romance with Jaehyun, a pitiful thing that died even before it was born—or so it had seemed. For a while, Jaehyun seemed truly remorseful about how he acted that night, and he was back to the old Jaehyun you knew, patient and gentle; the furious and impulsive man you had seen that night nowhere to be seen… until you drew him out of hiding, unintentionally this time. “What the hell, Jaehyun? Did you like send out a memo to all the guys on campus to stay away from me or something? You’re ridiculous!” You shout as you burst through the door, your fury preceding you to lash at the unsuspecting man sitting on the living room couch. “I didn’t. You can talk to whoever you want to.” He answers noncommittally, pretending to be oblivious to your actual meaning, but you could see the understanding in his eyes.   A couple of months had passed since then; it made you forget the fearsome side of Jaehyun that he’d shown you for the first time that night, or maybe you were gullible enough to believe you’d seen the end of it, so you innocently make the mistake of confusing his current evasiveness for guilt. But that side of him was still here, perhaps it always was, and it wasn’t guilt he was feeling.   “Stop with the bullshit, Jaehyun. You know that’s not what I meant. Did you warn people not to hook up with me?” You stand in front of him, towering over his seated form and glowering down at him with all your might. By all means, you should be the intimidating party in this situation but Jaehyun doesn’t flinch. He doesn’t even bother standing up in order to be level with you. He just glares back at you in a way that makes you feel like a student being given a timeout by their teacher. You had no doubt he’d done it, there was no other explanation as to why you suddenly couldn’t get hookup when you had no trouble finding one before, and all the guys you tried to talk to would try to get away from you as fast as possible as if you had some kind of new, highly contagious, highly incurable STD. Jaehyun is a popular guy, friends with all the guys and crushed on by all the girls. He’s a guy’s guy and the definition of boyfriend material. Not to mention that he is a member of the biggest fraternity on campus. He can be extremely intimidating when he wants to, something you had been aware of ever since you were a kid but had never experienced directly before that night; no one ever dared bully you and when Jaehyun decided that someone was bad news, they weren’t allowed near you again. In short, Jaehyun had both the motive and the means to pull something like this off. You’re not usually one to care what people think of you, but the knowledge that essentially everyone on campus now knows that you’re being cockblocked by your overbearing brother figure is fucking mortifying. “Why were you trying to hook up with someone in the first place?” His voice was calm, but of the deceptive kind, the kind where all the anger had reached a singularity, lulling you into thinking it’s not there, only for it to eat you up when you get closer. “T-that’s not the point!” You falter, somehow feeling like you’re the one who had things to answer for.  “Did you or did you not—“ “Yes, it is.” He spit out, shutting you up. “We had a deal.” “Fuck your deal. This whole thing is dumb anyway. I don’t need you to parental control me. I’m a grown woman and I want sex.” You curse at him, but it sounds insolent and whiny in your shrill and jittery voice, like a sixteen year old petulantly declaring to her dad that she’s not a child anymore. “You can have sex when you’re in a long term committed relationship.” He says with finality as if he was already done discussing this, not the least bit convinced or amused by your act. His words didn’t upset you so much as his dismissiveness of the need for your input on your own sex life had. Jaehyun was never this unreasonable. Yes, he always had strong opinions when it came to you, but he made sure to explain clearly and patiently why he thought what he thought and, almost always, that was enough to convince you that he was right. There were some instances when you weren’t completely convinced by his reasoning, but those were few and far between and he had shown you time and time again that he only wanted the best for you so you always ended up listening to him anyway. You were forever his good girl, but that was because he was a good oppa. Now he was acting more like an overbearing parent than a protective older brother, and it frustrated you. “That could be years from now. I’m horny. I need to have sex now!” “Don’t speak that way. Are you an animal that you can’t control your urges?” He hisses, and you flinch back at the clear distaste in his voice, making tears start to bubble up behind your eyelids. You were entirely out of your depth dealing with a Jaehyun that was on the offensive, let alone a Jaehyun who was looking at you like you disgusted him. Does the thought of you having sexual needs like anyone else repulse him that much? You get that you’re like a sister to him, but you’re not actually related and the fact that the man you love, and have sexual thoughts about, finds the idea of you being sexual so revolting makes you want to cry. But you can’t cry. Because then Jaehyun would try to do anything to stop you from crying, even if he has to go as far as to lie and claim that he does want you. You have a theory that if you ever come to confess your love to him, he might just pretend that he loves you too just so he wouldn’t hurt you. He’d date you, marry you, be with you forever, if that would make you happy even if it came at the cost of his own happiness. No, you’d rather face the truth than live a lie. You don’t want to cry, so you get angry. “I’ll talk however the hell I want. I’m horny and I want to be fucked. I want a dick in my pussy. I want a dick in my mouth. Hell, I’d even take a dick in my ass at this point.” “___.” He growls in warning, but you couldn’t stop now if you wanted to. “Oh, you know what? Why don’t I have all those at once. I should just go to a bar and have a group of guys gangbang me—“   “Shut up!” He bellows suddenly, making you almost jump out of your skin. You stand shaking like a leaf in front of his full wrath. Suddenly, crying doesn’t seem like a bad idea. Jaehyun would soften immediately, scooping you up in his arms and whispering sweet lies into your ear until you’re smiling again. It’s a jarring thing, him being the source of your anxiety yet the only one who can ease it. He frightens you yet you want to fall into his arms and be safe within them.   Jaehyun closes his eyes and takes in a deep breath. You think he’s trying to calm himself down but when he opens them again, you’re hit with a nauseating sense of dejavu—there in his eyes is the same look he had that night, a furious ravenousness, like he could just eat you whole. The chill that shoots down your spine curiously embeds itself in your lower stomach then spreads out, leaving a warm, tingling ache in its place that you knew too well, and that Jaehyun was frequently the cause of. Maybe you were fucked up, but the dangerous air that curled and slithered around him right now swallowed all the meager defiance you had mustered within you, and dragged out the pathetic submissiveness you have towards the man in front of you by the teeth. Your eyes were glued to his, like a small animal hypnotized, and you see them going down your body as if to size you up, only to stop midway and fixate on something, his jaw clenching. Following where his gaze had settled, you realize with horror that you’ve unconsciously been rubbing your thighs together in a pitiful attempt to ease the ache burning between them. For an immeasurable amount of time, Jaehyun’s looks as if he’s in pain as conflicting emotions flit over his face, none of them readable to you which only makes you all the more distressed. Will he send you off in anger? In disgust? God, please anything but that.   All at once, his face is wiped clean, and you watch as he leans back on the couch, his frame affecting a stance of relaxation and calm that leaves you breathless and anticipating the worst. “Come here.” He orders, running a hand over one of his thighs deliberately. “Oppa?” You hesitate, not comprehending what he wanted from you, or not daring to. “Don’t make me repeat myself now, angel.” He warns, tapping his thigh impatiently. You don’t want to disobey him, yet you still hover where you are, buzzing with uncertainty and making little jerky half-movements to follow his order only to yank yourself back right away. You were scared that you were misunderstanding his intention, and even more scared that you weren’t. Suddenly, a hand wraps around your waist and yanks you down, Jaehyun propping you up where he wants you to be. Startled at the sudden drop, your body attempts to steady itself; your hands fly out to clutch at his shirt and your legs clench around his thigh that you were now straddling. Bad move, because now you could feel his toned torso underneath your palms, and your sensitive core was flush against his thick, muscular thigh.   “I’ve got you, angel.” He reassures you, but his husky voice so close to your ears only arouses you more, making you involuntarily buck your hips against him, your heat pushing down against his firm thigh and tearing a choked moan from your throat. Jaehyun stares at you, gaze calculating and trying to catch your own elusive one, “What’s the problem, angel?” “Nothing.” You bite your lip, avoiding his eyes, so he tangles a hand in your hair and tugs on it roughly, forcing you to look at him. “You will look at me when I’m talking to you. Is that understood?” His gaze is so sharp it could cut, and you can do nothing but nod meekly. That seems to appease him because he starts stroking your hair softly. But instead of being soothing, his touch burns you, building up your desire with every gentle stroke of his nails against your scalp, pleasurable but cautionary. “Now tell me.” You shake your head, scared to utter a word. You still didn’t know what he wanted. All you knew is what you wanted, and that is for him to keep touching you. There were so many ways for you to mess this up so you keep quiet. But Jaehyun didn’t like that. “It’s like you’re trying to piss me off.” He scoffs. His hands fall down to your hips and push them down, rubbing you against his thigh and making you cry out again, your hands fisting at his shirt and your eyes open wide. “Nothing, huh?” He goads you. Without intending to, you find yourself uttering out a small, “Please.” But it wasn’t enough for him, he wanted more. “What is it, angel? What do you want?” Why is he doing this to you? Is this a trick to get you to spill out your desire for him just so he could turn you away in disgust? No, Jaehyun would never hurt you like that. But that leaves only one other option… that he actually wants you. But that didn’t make any sense. He had told you himself that he regrets what he did that night. He seemed so sincere in his apologies too, much to your dismay. Yet, here he is, stone cold sober and trying to get you to tell him that you want him. Why?   Jaehyun didn’t like that you were taking this long to answer him. He props his thigh up, pushing it harder against your heat and increases his pace. “Didn’t you say something about being horny?” He prods, starting you off. Your brain starts to shut down, not caring if this was a trick or not anymore, too high off the maddening pleasure that was too little yet too much. “Yes.” You squeak, “I’m so, so horny.” “I can tell. Everyone can. Look at the way you’re dressed.” He tsks, eyeing your skimpy outfit consisting of a plunging tank top and ultra short skirt with disapproval. His hands run up your body, finger slipping under the thin straps and pulling at them, only to make them snap back against your skin, stinging you. “You might as well have gone out naked with ‘fuck me’ spray painted across your tits.” So there it is; this is what he wanted. All of this was just to make a point. You feel sick, the contents of your stomach turning over as you prepare for the ruthless rejection that is to come. But it never does. Instead, he engulfs your breasts in his large hands, kneading them over your paper-thin top. Your nipples instantly harden under his fingers and he pulls at them punishingly, but the pain and the pleasure are nothing but a dangerous cocktail to your touch deprived body, making you arch into his hands and whine. “Fuck, you’re not even wearing a bra.” He growls, pulling your tank top down under your breasts. “Didn’t we agree that you’d be a good girl? Is it too much to ask you to control yourself? Are you incapable of shutting your legs?” “I can.” You insisted, feeling his thumbs circle around your nipple teasingly and pulling away every time you try to push your breasts against his hands.   He scoffs at your answer, and pinches your nipples again. “You’re dripping on my leg.” Your eyes fly down, and sure enough, there is a big wet patch where your crotch met his thigh, your arousal having drenched through your panties and onto his sweatpants, making a mess. “You’re hopeless.”  He mutters as he leans down towards your breasts. His tongue swirls around a nipple, and you arch your back again, trying to push more of it into his mouth. He gives you what you want, but not without a price. He opens his mouth wide, engulfing your areola and sucking harshly on it, then he pulls on the nipple with his teeth, just hard enough to sting but not to actually hurt you. You whimper and moan under the assault, sharp pleasure stabbing through you as you desperately rut against his thigh trying to find some relief. “That’s right, baby girl. Hump oppa’s leg like the little slut you are.” He pops your nipple out of his mouth and starts moving to the other one, laying kisses between your breasts on his way. Taking your other nipple into his mouth, he gives it the same treatment while his fingers flick the one he just left and his hand kneads your breast. Your eyes roll back and you moan loudly, his wet, bruising kisses making you lose your mind. “Fuck, oppa, I’m wanna cum.” You cry, your hand dropping to your crotch and trying to slip underneath your shorts so you can finish yourself, but Jaehyun catches it quickly, he glaring at you. “Did you ask permission to do that?” “No oppa.” You whimper, your wrist frail in comparison to his large hand and the vice grip he has around you. “Are you so turned on by your oppa that you forgot your manners?” “I’m sorry, oppa.” You wail, “I just need to cum, please.” He regards you with cold eyes for a moment, looking displeased. Suddenly, he scoops you up and hauls you to his room. Once inside, he makes quick work of your clothes then pulls you to the floor, seating you on his lap facing his full length mirror with your back is to his chest. He pulls your legs wide apart, planting your feet on the ground and ordering you to keep them there.   “Look in the mirror.” He orders, fondling your breasts with one hand as he kisses your neck, tongue darting out to lick a trail down your neck. His other hand travels down to your pussy, fingers skimming over your slit teasingly. You screw your eyes shut and shake your head, embarrassed to see yourself so exposed, especially when he himself was still fully clothed. Jaehyun bites down on your neck and gives your breast a punishing squeeze, growling at you, “I said look.”   When you open your eyes, the sight of yourself reflected in the mirror flushes your face with a red, bursting heat that spreads down your neck and over chest. “Do you see what you look like?” Jaehyun breathes in your ear, his fingers spreading your pussy lips wide open. “You look like a whore, cheap and easy. This is how everyone sees you when you insist on going out dressed like that, searching for a dick to sit on. Is this what you want?” You shake your head vehemently, and answer in a small voice. “No.” “Then why do you insist on being a whore?” He snarls, frustrated. “I’m just horny.” You mouth, sound barely leaving your mouth. “Then you come to me. I said I’d take care of you, didn’t I?” His fingers swirl around your clit, making you dizzy, and murmurs into your hair like a promise. “Always.” When he starts rubbing the pads of his fingers firmly and incessantly against your clit and sucking bruises onto your neck, your minds fogs over, causing you blurt to out, “But you’re not my boyfriend.” “Hmm, so what?” He spits out and suddenly plunges two of his fingers into your dripping hole. Startled by the sudden stretch, your legs spasm, trying to close shut, but Jaehyun hooks his ankles over yours and keeps you spread wide. “You said I shouldn’t have sex with anyone who isn’t my boyfriend.”   “I said you shouldn’t fuck around. But you’re a woman now and you have needs like you said. I can help you take care of that and protect you from what’s out there. I can keep you safe until he comes.” He cajoles, kissing the sensitive skin under your ear and curling his fingers inside of you. “Do you want that, baby?” “Yes,” Later, you’d try to tell yourself that the word that came out of you so readily was a mere reaction to his fingers finding that sweet spot inside of you, but it would be useless. “That means keeping your legs shut around everyone but oppa. Think you can do that?” He dumbs it down for you. “Yes, oppa.” Your voice quivers as you feel your high building up. Pumping his fingers faster in and out of you, he angles it just right to hit that sweet spot every time. The pleasure inside you was reaching critical mass; you just needed a trigger, which he grants you when he turns your head back towards him, humming a ‘good girl’ against your lips then kissing you. You pant and moan against his mouth as you climax, making it easy for him to push his tongue inside your mouth. When you instinctively wrap your lips around his tongue and suck lightly, you’re rewarded with the sexiest moan that has ever graced your ears. You never want this to stop, and he’s kind enough to stay like that for a few minutes, fingers wedged deep in your pussy and his mouth and tongue locked with your own in a messy makeout session. Eventually though, Jaehyun slips his fingers out of you and presses a last peck against your saliva coated lips before pulling back to look at you, eyes clouded over and lids drooping. “You’ll be good, won’t you, angel?” He implores you in his sweet husky voice, and how can anyone expect you to say no?   “I will.” He smiles at you, not a toothy smile but still warm and happy and it makes your heart swell. Heart bursting at the seams and eager to please him more, you turn around in his embrace and direct your attention to his hard length that’s been poking against your back for some time now, intending to return the favor. But when you reach out for it, his hand shoots out to stop you and the smile falls from his face. You feel uneasy at the sudden change in his demeanor, but you courageously power though anyway. “Let me take care of you too, oppa.” “There is no need. I can take care of it myself.” He says emotionlessly. “I know but wouldn’t it feel better if I helped you?” You croak, feeling your heart pounding erratically against your rib age. “I said no.” He barks, and you shrink back. He sighs in annoyance at your reaction and rakes a hand through his hair. “Just… I don’t need you to touch me, ok?” “Of course. It’s no problem.” You choke back your tears, “Can you, um, let go of me?” Jaehyun was still holding your wrist in his hand, staring at you and looking as if he doesn’t have any intention of releasing you soon. You know he can see the tears brimming in your eyes, and you start preparing yourself mentally for the forced coddling that is to come, knowing it will only make you feel worse. But for the first time ever, Jaehyun pretends that he doesn’t see your tears, and lets you go.                                     •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• A/N: Is this story falling apart yet? I’m nervous, please donate some feedback to this starving artist.

[jancys-blue-bayou]

Okay as requested by anon, minific 16. things you said with no space between us. This is a continuation of the last one, showing what happens at the movie theatre... smut ahoy. Starts turning filthy below the cut. Also this is definitely not a mini fic in length but brevity definitely isn’t the soul of smut.

Well, this is the best work shift ever, hands down. Not many people, Mr. Wilkinson wasn’t even in and soon as the lobby emptied when a screening started Nancy was kissing him. Now the last screening of the night is taking place, Mask and it’s soon over then he just has to clean up, do the register, say goodnight to George the projectionist and lock up, then he and Nancy can go and find a good place to park and continue this night in the way it’s been headed to for awhile now.

Right now Nancy is perched on top of the ticket counter. She’s hooked her legs around his waist, pinning him close to her as their tongues do some serious wrestling. Hands in each other’s hair.

“Aren’t your jaws getting tired?” He pants out when they take a breath. They’ve been making out, with regular interruptions, for hours now.

“No, are yours?” She murmurs and moves her hands from his hair down to his jaws and starts massaging him there. God every way she touches him is perfection.

Suddenly a door opens as someone sneaks out from the screening. Nancy is lightning quick to jump off the counter — but not on the other side like he expected. Instead she goes down on her knees on his side of it to hide under the counter. An old man has appeared in the lobby, looking around. Jonathan quickly adjusts his hair and hopes his cheeks aren’t too flushed.

“Excuse me young man, can you tell me where the bathroom is?” The old man calls over to him.

“To your left, Sir,” he answers.

At the same time he feels Nancy put her hand over the noticeable bulge in his pants that is the result of their extended make out session. She starts to stroke her hand over the fabric. Her touch makes him even harder. Oh my God.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that, my hearing isn’t what it used to be. Where was the bathroom did you say?” The old geezer steps closer to him. Oh God don’t come too close please don’t come too close. He chances a glance down at Nancy and the mischievous smirk on her face makes him almost keel over.

“Just to your left thERE,” he repeats and points, voice rising on the last syllable as Nancy intensifies her stroking, fondling, of him.

“Ah, thank you!”

When the old man has made it into the bathroom he pulls Nancy up.

“Holy shit, Nance!”

“What...” she lets out in a drawl before kissing him again.

“You’re gonna be the death of me...”

“I hope not... by the way you look so cute in this outfit,” she smiles into another kiss, pulling him in by his red vest.

He’s always thought the lame outfit is the worst part of his job.

“I’m a really big fan of these pants, they’re very revealing...”

He’s always hated the loose-fitting black pants, until tonight when it uh, was a relief to not be wearing too restricting pants. Now Nancy undoes the top button. The pants stay around his waist but it gives her access to slide a hand inside. Inside his pants, inside his boxers. Right here by the counter in the lobby where anyone can appear at any moment.

“Nance...”

“Mmhm?” She murmurs.

He loses his whole train of thought when she grips him by the base and strokes all the way to the tip. He moans right into her mouth.

“Fuck...”

The latch on the bathroom door turns and Nancy instantly ducks down under the counter again. The old man comes back out into the lobby. Please don’t be one of those talkative seniors, he prays. Please just go right back inside. Damnit, he’s coming over. Nancy’s hand is back on his crotch.

“You’ll need to refill the paper towels, thought I’d let you know.”

“Oh, thanks for the heads up.”

Nancy buttons his pants again. Thank God, he thinks. Then she zips him down instead. The old man makes no move to head back into the auditorium. Shit shit shit.

“Have you seen this movie?”

“Uh, yes I have...”

Nancy manages to get his dick out through the whole in the front of his boxers. Shit shit shit.

“I can’t say I’m riveted by it. Do you know if the boy playing the lead’s face really is deformed or is it make up?”

“I believe it’s make UP,” he answers, voice rising an octave when Nancy teasingly strokes him once.

“Figured. I just can’t stand that woman playing the mother, what’s her name again?”

“Uh... Cher?” He somehow manages to remember the name even though almost all his focus is on Nancy who is currently slowly running a finger along the length of his cock.

“Right, that’s her. What do you think?”

“Uh... can’t say I’m a fan no.” Suddenly Nancy grabs his balls, letting her nails sink in just a little. “UHHH I mean she is very good at what she does. And I think she does a good job in the movie especially considering she’s mainly a singer,” he changes his answer. Nancy’s nails leave his balls and instead she rewards him with another stroke.

“Hm, well I suppose. But they don’t make movies like they used to. Hitchcock, John Ford, those guys could really make pictures!”

“Completely agree... but uh I have to say you don’t want to miss the ending of this one...” he tries, to get the man to leave and go back inside.

“Well, we’ll see... I suppose I’ll go back and watch, I paid for it after all. Well, nice talking with you young man.”

“Enjoy the rest of the moVIE... Sir.”

Nancy suddenly placed a kiss to the tip. He tries and fails miserably at staying composed at that. The old man had already turned away but turns back and looks puzzled. Then shrugs and turns and walks back inside to see the rest of the movie.

“What the hell was that about?!” He hisses when Nancy has gotten out from under the counter.

“Don’t ever disrespect Cher, she’s awesome,” she huffs. He doesn’t know what to do, protest, put his dick away, kiss her, tell her this is crazy or just bend her over the counter already. She gets in there first though. “What’s behind this door?” She asks, pointing over her shoulder.

“Utility closet,” he explains.

“Perfect.”

She grasps his cock firmly so when she walks over to the closet all he can do is follow. She opens the door and drags him inside.

Inside the dark and cramped closet she pounces on him soon as he’s shut the door behind him. She feverishly kisses him and jerks his cock again. He’s incredibly turned on. He turns them around so she’s pressed up against the door and deepens the kiss. She lets out a pleased moan right into his mouth.

“You’re such a fucking tease...” He murmurs between kisses while working his hands up under her shirt to fondle her boobs.

“You love it,” she answers before kissing him again.

“You’re a work hazard...” He tells her while riding a hand up under her skirt.

“You’re a real hard worker...” She teases him, stroking him faster.

He pulls her panties down. She’s so wet, he feels when he strokes her.

“Fuck me Jonathan...” she murmurs.

Instinctively, he slides his hands down over her ass to the back of her thighs and hoists her up. She lets out a big surprised, excited moan against his lips and puts her arms over his shoulders, holding herself up as she hikes her legs around him. Her back rests against the door. He briefly lets go of her with his right hand to steer his cock inside.

He enters her and they’re pressed as close together as they can possibly be, in this small dark closet, among brooms, mops and bleach. He bucks into her and she draws him in even closer and presses her lips to his. 

“Fuck Jonathan, fuck me... fuck me...”

He does so, of course. Pumping in and out of her quickly everything feels hot and amazing, time and space disappears and it’s just him and Nancy. It feels almost as if they become one, so close and perfectly in sync.

It doesn’t last long, it can’t when she’s gotten him so riled up for hours. He buries himself deep inside her and cums while she in hoarse whispers by his ear tells him she loves him.

He sets her down. Even in the dark he can see how flushed she is.

“Wow... fuck that was-”

He interrupts her, closing the gap, drawing her close to him and spinning them around again. He puts his hand to her still dripping wet pussy. Finds her clit and rubs two fingers in circles in a fast tempo while having his other arm wrapped around her holding her close. He captures her lips with his to silence her moans. 

When she cums against his hand she stumbles back and hits the mop bucket but he keeps her upright.

“Holy shit I love you,” she gets out when she’s collected herself a little before hastily pressing another kiss to his lips.

“Love you too. I’m gonna go back out there. Movie’s almost over,” he tells her while buttoning his pants.

“I uh... wow...” she’s not really gathered herself yet and he’s quite pleased he managed to fluster her like that after all she put him through. And he is really pleased that she is pleased. “Uh I will uh... I’ll just stay here and uh... breathe for awhile uh... come get me when the coast is clear.”

“Will do,” he smiles. “You incredibly hot, hazardous tease,” he continues, giving her a final kiss before opening the door a sliver to check that the lobby is still empty, which it is, and sneaking back out.

Once the movie’s finished and everyone is gone and George the projectionist has left and he’s locked the doors, he knocks on closet.

“Clear,” he tells her before opening the door.

“Awesome,” she tells him, walking straight up to him and giving him a big kiss and pressing her panties into his hand. “I’m ready for act two.”

[sparkleywonderful]

The Prince of Nostalgia [ Ch.13 ]

Part 13 of The Prince of Ice series, a retelling of Heir of Fire from Rowan’s point of view.

Previous Parts [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] [ 4 ] [ 5 ] [ 6 ] [ 7 ] [ 8 ] [ 9 ] [ 10 ] [ 11 ] [ 12 ]

AO3

A/N: I have been dying to write this chapter, just dying. Because it is the first time we see a playful Rowan. The first time I read this chapter I did not appreciate it. Rowan has been stuck in darkness and he still is. When you start to heal from life crippling event, there are good days and bad days and all the meh days in-between. On the good days you remember how to live, on the good days you remember the little things.

- - - - - - -

He did not want to admit to himself the reason he was in a good mood. When he decided to take Aelin to the commune, he did it for her, to show her something that she would not find in Rifthold and honestly to take a break from training. What he did not expect was the excitement and eagerness the flowed out of her.

He had done that and in turn, it had released something in his soul, something warm and forgotten. His nightmares last night were mild and when he awoke with the taste of her blood in his mouth, he did not want to immediately go and rip her to shreds. Instead he patiently waited for Aelin to grab breakfast. When she finally appeared, he held his small pack open for her. “Clothes.”

He did not know what to say to her. Just about everything he had ever said to her, riled her up. He couldn’t help but smile at the thought that maybe he got under her skin, just as much as she did his. He wanted to enjoy the fleeting moment of amicable silence between them, so he headed west and did not speak until they were through the wards.

“Shift, and let’s go,”

“And here I was, thinking we’d become friends.” Friends. What in the hell was this girl doing to him?  He could not find it in himself to completely reject or accept the term.

So instead he gave her a wicked grin, “It’s twenty miles, we’re running . . . Each way.”

“And where are we going?”

He didn’t know why he expected her just to comply. “There was another body—a demi-Fae from a neighboring fortress. Dumped in the same area, same patterns. I want to go to the nearby town to question the citizens, but …”

He needed to stop himself right there, he didn’t need to snarl, his kind caused this rift.

“But I need your help. It’ll be easier for the mortals to talk to you.”

“Is that a compliment?”

He clenched his jaw and rolled his eyes, “Shift, or it’ll take us twice as long.”

“I can’t. You know it doesn’t work like that.”

A month had taught him that snarling at her was not going to result in her shifting. Neither was silence, patience, or growling. Fists, curse words and vulgar gestures also did not work. The countless hours of chopping wood did not seem to phase her. He doubted that flattery would work, in that sense he knew they were the same, flattery were hollow words. Maybe a challenge.

“Don’t you want to see how fast you can run?”

“I can’t use my other form in Adarlan anyway, so what’s the point?”

Because you are here now, because we are here now and for the second day in a row he was not drowning in the past.

“The point is that you’re here now, and you haven’t properly tested your limits.”

Fine, if that point would not work, “The point is, another husk of a body was found, and I consider that to be unacceptable.”

He gave her braid a sharp tug as he taunted her, just like the times he used to taunt his cousin Sellene, “Unless you’re still frightened.”

He almost laughed as he watched her nostrils flare, he never understood what it was about tugging a braid that infuriated girls.

“The only thing that frightens me is how very much I want to throttle you.”

And there it was. The same look she had each time she had shifted. It was not out of fear that she had shifted, no it was anger.

“Hone it—the anger.”

He enraged her every day, unless he didn’t. Unless the cursing, snarling, growling, and vulgarities was an outlet or a wall to protect, maybe both. Anger, he understood anger. He had lived the past two hundred years in some form of anger, because he could never find peace.

“Let it be a blade, Aelin. If you cannot find the peace, then at least hone the anger that guides you to the shift. Embrace and control it—it is not your enemy.”

That is when he saw it, she had been afraid to shift from whatever conditioning she had received. All this time it was fear that stopped the transition, it was anger that fueled it. He would have to think on that later.

“This will not end well,” she breathed.

He would not back down, every sense in his body told him he was close, that she was close to breaking through the veil.

“See what you want, Aelin, and seize it. Don’t ask for it; don’t wish for it. Take it.”

Because no one is ever going to give it to you, even what the gods gift you they will take away.

“I’m certain the average magic instructor would not recommend this to most people.”

She was not most people and he was not a magic instructor. He really did hope that his uncle paid their magic instructor well. Between him, Edna and Sellene, that instructor really did not have a chance.

“You are not most people, and I think you like it that way. If it’s a darker set of emotions that will help you shift on command, then that’s what we’ll use. There might come a day when you find that anger doesn’t work, or when it is a crutch, but for now . . . it was the common denominator those times you shifted—anger of varying kinds. So own it.”

And there she was. The ice in his veins danced and in that moment he decided he wanted play. So he moved with speed that he had honed over the years and yanked her braid. And for a moment he remembered the happiness he had as a child, teasing his cousins. He darted and pinched her side.

“Stop—”

He was standing in front of her now, his magic and his heart were screaming, begging her, please play with me.

He moved to pinch her left side — What. The. Rutting. Hell. Just. Happened?  

He blinked. She did not seriously just whack him upside the head, while blocking him.

Her answering smirk, was all he needed.

“Oh, you’d better run now.”

He slowed his pace waiting for her to adjust to her new body, to the senses that were likely overwhelming. He watched the anger fade away into what seemed like joy.

For the first time in what seemsed like an eternity Rowan let the world go. Let the pain. The expectations. The titles. The sorrow. The loss. He let them all go and lived in that moment. He could not remember the last time he felt this free. The last time he smiled from joy. He did not want to stop.

When they arrived, she was just staring at him and the reality of the situation hit him in the gut, they both had demons that they would never be free from. So he tossed her the spare shirt she brought from the pack and turned to change into his own.

- - - - - -

The town had been everything he expected, closed doors and sealed lips. He was about ready to head back to the fortress.

“You’re used to this, I assume?”

“A lot of the Fae who venture into mortal lands have earned themselves a reputation for … taking what they want. It went unchecked for too many years, but even though our laws are stricter now, the fear remains.”

He had pushed for the change, actually him and Gavriel had just taken it upon themselves to punish the crueler of their kind.

“Who enforces these laws?”

It was one of the few tasks that he enjoyed. The assassination orders and campaigns he could live without, the thanked the gods that he did not have to share her bed. “I do. When I’m not off campaigning, my aunt has me hunt down the rogues.”

“And kill them?”

Most of them time, unless it is a rogue she has a plan for.

“If the situation calls for it. Or I just haul them back to Doranelle and let Maeve decide what to do with them.”

“I think I’d prefer death at your hands to death at Maeve’s.”

Most would, but they often forgot that sometimes we were just an extension of Maeve’s hands. If we were ordered to kill a fae over days, the bond demanded that the death be slow.

“That might be the first wise thing you’ve said to me.”

“The demi-Fae said you have five other warrior friends. Do they hunt with you? How often do you see them?”

It had actually been a while since he had seen and of the inner circle. Now that he thought of it, he had been stationed mostly in Wendlyn since the winter.

“I see them whenever the situation calls for it. Maeve has them serve her as she sees fit, as she does with me.”

“It is an honor to be a warrior serving in her inner circle.”

He said it only because today he needed to remind himself of the lie he had been telling himself since Sollemere. She hadn’t even ordered the children out, he and Lorcan drew that line in the sand.

“Did you bring any money?”

“Yes. They won’t take your bribes, though.”

“Good. More for me, then.”

She pointed to the sign swaying in the breeze. He should have known that the princess had a sweet tooth.

“If we can’t win them with charm, we might as well win them with our business.”

“Did you somehow not hear what I just—”

And just like that, an 18 year old girl taught him a lesson he had never learned. Bribes were for courtiers, politicians and criminals, not for close knit communities with hard working peoples. They went from shop to shop and he watched in amazement as Aelin charmed every single business owner. He carried every bag and box, except the chocolate. He was pretty sure that Hellas himself could not get those chocolates from her.  He appreciated that most of what she bought could be used by someone at Mistward. She had only bought herself the chocolates and a few books.

The day ended and although they gained no new information, it was a good day.

He watched her sleep and so did the little people. When they realized that he would keep watch, they drifted away.

The last two days and the silence of the evening under the stars, brought forth a plethora of thoughts. He stared at the Lord of the North as he acknowledged that in a month, not even a full month, she had him feeling more than he had in the last two hundred years. He knew he would never be free, Maeve would only release him to death, but that did not stop the yearning in his blood for that home full of pine and snow. Until today he did not regret his oath, and he knew at some point this would end, the girl would leave, but it was damn nice to have a happy memory for once.

Parts [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] [ 4 ] [ 5 ] [ 6 ] [ 7 ] [ 8 ] [ 9 ] [ 10 ] [ 11 ] [ 12 ] [ 13 ] [ 14 ] [ 14.5 ] [ 15 ] [ 16 ]  [ 17 ] [ 18 ] [ 19 ] [ 20 ]

[tori10rambles]

Jumin’s route is done! That was a freaking roller coaster. aka the route in which i probably broke my own heart a little before I even finished Day 4, and it only got worse from there. And DAY 10 DESTROYED ME.

Being the rabid Seven fangirl I am, getting this route was hard. The only thing that kind of soothes my heart is that I didn't get any heart breaks from Seven. (You know, besides his actual heart by Day 10. That kind of negated... almost all my good feelings).

i just want to help like, every single one of these losers with their problems jfc.

Also, per usual, these comments were written as the game was being played, and so are probably kind of incoherent, and switch from first and 3rd person POV sometimes in the middle of the same point. All of that is under the cut.

Also, for some reason, the After end CG didn’t save to my album. Hm....

  Jumin

So much of his personality is explained by his dad honestly. Also, I have a very bad feeling about his dad and the Choi lady.

When you grow up in the public eye, it seems like the choices are to either try to become as bland/invisble as possible to avoid having the paparazzi on your ass (as seen with Jumin), or you do a Tony Stark and make a party/attention whore mask and basically try to own it.

Considering how Jumin describes his dad (skirt chaser? easily seduced by a pretty face?), I'm not completely surprised that he doesn't like women.

Also, should I be concerned that I find his utter failure at photography kind of adorable and odd, considering his best friend is a professional photographer?

...What the fuck did your dad do? A fiancee, seriously? The creepiest part is that apparently she's related/connected to his new skirt?

"I won't sell out my father over my cat." Does that mean your dad's actually tried that/is trying that? jfc

it's kind of cute watching him be concerned over MC, because you can kind of tell that he's warming up to her/starting to like her, but doesn't really get (want to acknowledge?) why.

Your dad is an asshole for using you as a bargaining chip. Also, please note that Jumin apparently cares about the company and how his father's personal life affects it more than his father does. And that Jumin is still more considerate of people's feelings, despite being a "robot."

...Considering the women from your dream sound like gold diggers and possibly at least one cougar/pedophile, I cannot blame you for disliking women.

Also, his dad is really bad at getting him. I feel bad because this seems like the first time this happened? Someone save Jumin from his well meaning, but obviously ignorant-about-his-son's-personality father.

Putting your cat in a cage because you think it’s the safest option does not include the emotional problems of being stuck in a cage

You’re projecting, Jumin... Rika onto Elizabeth? Wtf? I gotta say you apparently dodged a bullet considering what she did to V’s eyes

Jumin talking about controlling his cat is .... really creepy. because he talks about Elizabeth 3rd like she's a person/personified to him, so what would he do with an actual person he cares for?

he thinks intimacy is a luxury. jfc

So I'm at your place, but I'd really like an explanation for the cage.

y'all know things are bad when Jaehee knows he's unstable. ...why am i at his place at night again?

So while I'm enjoying you riling up Zen, some of your comments creep me out ("I don't want anyone else to look at her"). That's creepy (and also not a response I would choose), even if it is kind of cute.

are you offering to cook, or are you offering your chefs? Because strawberry pancakes sound delicious.

...wtf, put me to bed? I am not a child or a pet. 

Yoyoyo, does this imply you had feelings for Rika? omf not another person who wants me to be her replacement jfc yoosung was bad enough

Who is surprised that Elizabeth 3rd ran away? Not me.

i cannot believe you went and used lines from a soap opera to play Sarah. ...And that it worked

...Is this REALLY the time to be kissing me!? And what is it with these men and kissing me when I'm not ready for it!? Seriously, these guys have some awful timing.

Um... no. You are not giving Elizabeth 3rd back to V. You obivously love her, and you need more than just MC to care about, Jumin.

...I cannot believe you just said "the use is fairly similar" when I asked if I was a replacement for your pet. If I could, I'd run. I'd run SO FAR.

I'm pretty sure Elizabeth ran away because you legit went and caged her for hours when she's used to roaming around your penthouse freely.

...forever? HELL NO. I am my own person and deserve to be treated as such.

this complete 180 in personality is disturbing as hell.

Possessive Jumin scares me. A lot. At least he knows a relationship needs time.

...Half the shit coming out of your mouth sounds so creepy.

Trapping me somewhere and telling me it's for my own good is not protecting me... it's making me desperate to leave.

omfg, the Jumin phone call with the hilarious response!

Jumin's building is like a gilded cage. it terrifies me on a level i can't comprehend. like, I may be a bit of a shut in, but even I leave the goddamn building when I feel like it. It's the fact that I have the choice to leave, i think.

He feels... surprisingly less menacing/creepy on Day 9. Thank god.

Oh thank god they found Elly. hopefully this means Jumin will CALM THE FUCK DOWN.

I'm with Jumin on this one, his dad is really blinded if he thinks hiding your credit report from a businessman you're trying to marry is a good idea. That just screams goldigger

The fact that Jumin actually expressed his emotions and concerns to his dad, jfc that's progress. Also, he's managed to find a middle ground, SCORE!

...dude, how often do you say thank you and that you appreciate Jaehee;s work if she's that shocked?

that phone call immediately after the meeting with father is actually pretty sweet? omg. but the one where I call him after that VN was kind of... eh. not as nice

...When was the last time jaehee got a holiday? When was th elast time you LET her!?

...Okay, the VN after the 21:46 chat on Day 10 wasn't bad until the very end. Then it got weird. I am NOT a thing to be devoured jfc.

THANK YOU for seeing what's wrong with Rika's vision of a perfect world.

"We like each other. How can we be dangerous to each other." - THERE ARE SO MANY WAYS TO RESPOND TO THIS I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO START.

YOU ARE NOT PUTTING ME IN A GODDAMNED CAGE. I AM NOT A PET OR AN ANIMAL JFC THAT'S NOT SOMETHING TO JOKE ABOUT.

I feel like you're planning some sick burns, and it involves public humiliation. I'm so down for this.

At least you're letting me out of the penthouse?

Your idea of marriage is weird, but understandable. Also, I hope to HELL that wasn't a proposal after you only met me 10 Days ago, and LOCKED ME IN YOUR APARTMENT FOR MOST OF THOSE DAYS.

...what's with the rings on you status icon?

YES YOU'RE BEING TOO POSSESSIVE.

You sound kind of adorable as a kid.

Now that he's let me go home, he's actually kind of cute? I liked his Christmas DLC ending better tho.

Oh my god, that's savage.Public humiliation ftw.

YOU ACTUALLY PROPOSED. WTF. the dress is awesome though. i'd wear that but with less boob window

Seven

I'm so sorry. T_T I'm leaving your route for last, which means I need to be mean/indifferent to you and this sucks like hell. Especially since I get to talk to you more than once in a while. Almost none of the responses I want to make in Days 1-4 are the ones I chose to get this route. this is pain. none of this is okay. i am not okay. i will probably not be okay whenever i think about seven during Jumin's route.

The space station phone call makes me want to cry, because shit, he obviously is crushing at this point? And I'm going to end up crushing his heart into itty bitty pieces and I can't stand it. It's like... like waiting for the inevitable, and the suspense only builds because you know it's gonna happen, but you don't know how bad the resulting reaction will be.

The cat dream phone call makes me really fucking sad. because taken into consideration with the conversation Unknown and Seven had in Yoosung's route, and Unknown's rant in Yoosung's Bad End 3, I'm getting very concerned about Seven's childhood.

Everytime you break the fourth wall, I squee. And goddamn, you're right about games and Yoosung.

Zen and Seven are so freaking mean to Jumin, omf. but seriously this is the kind of drag I'd do to my friends, so long as they knew I was open for retaliation and didn't mean half of it

Your love for your cars is kind of adorable.

Seven’s friendships w yoosung and zen are hilarious and adorable. Like, give me more of it.

Why do i think that half the things you claim come from a book you read are actually things you think up yourself?

Every time you meet Unknown, my feels hurt. And I really, really want that explanation for who he is.  I mean, I read spoilers obviously, if you've seen my tags, but I wanna see how the game reveals it.

This man, seeing him sound so broken after his encounter with Unknown continues to upset me. That phone call about relationships hurts to, because there is CLEARLY some projecting going on there.

THIS FUCKING PHONE CALL.

Jfc, Seven is not okay. I'm so glad i can ask if he is or not and not end up on a bad end. But damn is it not fun to see him break. And the aftermath.

You're not okay (the 15:29 chatroom sounds like you're talking about Unknown btw, which I mean, MC doesn't know, but is obvious to anyone who is watching you), but I hope you can be okay soon.

Also, this just makes things even worse to me? Because not only has the person he cared about NOT chosen him, but the person from his past who was supposed to be safe and happy apparently hates him. And he's not getting any answers. Like, this just might the worst route for Seven?

Wait, what did V promise you? What does it have to do with unknown? Good lord, I want answers. Mostly so you finally have them.

Zen

Stop flirting with everything in a skirt that breathes. Especially me. That can only end badly.

Also, please know I agree with you SO HARD about Jumin's treatment of his workers, but again, I'm going for Jumin's route this time, which means agreeing with him.

But please, quit picking on jumin about being an "ice king" or "robot," because he literally does not know how to express emotions.

You and Seven are so freaking mean to Jumin, omf.

Zen’s dream is creepy. Adding meowing to the creepy music box music is not cool

your misconceptions about Jumin's life is amusing and concerning

lololol Big Brother Zen does not like MC being alone with Jumin.

Thank you Zen, for saying everything I've been saying about this situation.

religious nuts? Zen!? What if that's Mint Eye

Zen continues to be the best dude for coming to MC's defense.

Yoosung

I'm so afraid for this boy because he's so gullible. You'd think he'd know by now that Seven likes to troll people. No, I'm not counting the resets in that statement. Seven made it clear basically in the first couple of chats/calls/texts he participated in that he's a humongous troll when it suits him.

OMFG the infamous M call. I was not prepared for that holy shit.

omf Yoosung. STUDY. PLEASE. ...And now you have summer classes.

your misconceptions about Jumin's life is amusing and concerning (the bodyguard thing at least)

your insight into Jumin and his view of relationships is... really close to what i thought. good job yoosung!

I pity Yoosung for taking care of Elizabeth.

Jaehee

I'm so sorry I have to condone Jumin's work practices for a good end. And that I just gave Jumin a new cat project. You don't deserve this bullshit. No one deserves this bullshit.

Are you playing wingwoman? because it might actually be working.

I don't blame you for this really creepy situation.

you're so kind of try and assuage Zen's worries.

I understand your frustration with Jumin and wholeheartedly support it

I'm so glad you get a holiday omfg. Also, it’s hella cute and kinda depressing that you’re so happy about getting the vacation.

V

Your friendship with Jumin is so cute wtf.

is it your guilt complex and your need to keep the memebrs "safe" that would make you upset that Yoosung is going along with Seven? Because if so, that's kind of hypocritical considering Seven's a member, and you wanted him to go alone.

Goddamn it V. Thanks to your secrecy, I can't go back to the apartment.

ANSWER SEVEN. PLEASE. SEEING HIM SO DOWN IS NOT FUN.

Oh my god you're sassy. I wasn't expecting that. It's awesome though. Legit, half the fandom seems to forget that V is a sassy mofo. We need more of it.

Rika

...Wow, you are crazy. "A device that can take everything, that can delete everything"... What the hell kind of shit is in that apartment, Rika? Because there is no way there's only information about your party guests... Or is that the entire point? Is there blackmail there?

...You just sounded so nice there, talking to Jumin. Wtf happened to you?

A world without pain or mistakes... that's so idealistic... and impossible. Progress is important! We'll stagnate otherwise, and while being comfortable is important, so is making progress so that EVRYONE is happy. You can't tell me that those who are poor and starving and sick are happy where they are. Feeling sad is HEALTHY, especially after making a mistake or being affected by one. It's what keeps us empathetic and compassionate towards others!

...Are you REALLY asking your BOYFRIEND'S BEST FRIEND if he'd date you? REALLY!? I CANNOT BELIEVE... That's so cruel to V! Even if it WAS a joke!

And honestly, that last statement sounds like you want everyone to like... commit assisted group suicide or something.

Unknown & Mint Eye

Why does it seems like Unknown is talking to you in the VN from Day 2? It's so creepy, especially when you're reading that chat in the dark, after having woken up in the middle of the night for the game.

Goddamn it you gave me a heart attack. I can't tell if it's the music that scared me more or the messages.

...How have I gone three routes and not realized your HQ is a fucking castle?

Sarah & Glam Choi

Fucking gold diggers and attention whores, man. I cannot believe y'all are trying to use Jumin and his dad for money. Like, wtf?

Also, what the hell gave you the idea that Jumin is the type to mix work and pleasure? Also, Jaehee could totally do better than Jumin.

You are never getting rid of Elizabeth 3rd. It's stupid to think you can try, let alone succeed.

Goddamn it, using the paparazzi to your advantage is a dick move.

Knew you were after their money. You company is weak af Sarah, and apparently you have no idea how to make money.

...how stupid are you to think that Jumin couldn't recognize his own goddamn cat.

...Y'all just got PLAYED by the Ice King.

Public humiliation ftw! now leave and don't come back.

Uh... I couldn’t really enjoy this route very much because of the very possessive and creepy undertones halfway through the 11 days. I mean, I know he gets better, but honestly, that shouldn’t be behavior an s/o should have to stick around and try to “fix.” It also sounds a lot like coercive behavior abusers would use? Basically, I think Jumin needs a therapist who will probably need their own therapist instead of a girlfriend, because that kind of emotional burden is heavy and not something I think I personally could handle.

I was talking to someone else about this route, and we agreed that his route really isn’t good for anyone who isn’t personally emotionally or mentally healthy/alright.

[jump-off-a-clifford-universe]

confession no. 2, 3, 4 all together in one post

I love my dog so, so, so much. He’s a result of an impulsive decision, but he will be the best thing that will have ever happened to me. Even when he drives me crazy, his unyielding stubbornness getting the best of me sometimes, I still cannot contain how much I love him. It’s unbelievable how my family is everything to him, how much I mean to him, and my heart just melts whenever he looks at me - it’s hard to guess what he’s thinking from his warm, honey eyes, but there’s just so much love pouring out of his eyes: love for life, live for new adventures, love for me, and love for every tiny little wonder that us humans take for granted. There was a time when I was so tired of life, school and work and social life and health and everything forming a weight too heavy for me to shoulder all at once, but my dog got me through it all. I’m so grateful for him because if it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I doubt that I’ll even hang on for so long. Sure, some of my problems and worries were caused by him - to be honest, when he was younger, he drives me insane. Those razor sharp baby teeth and the endless amount of energy are more than I have ever expected. I missed how cute he was, but I certainly do not miss him in his baby phase. Looking back in retrospect, he has come so far. We both made sacrifices, changed our lives for each other. We still have a semi-dysfunctional relationship, but we have grown so much for and because of each other. My camera roll is filled with pictures and videos of him - pictures of him running in a grass field for the first time, videos of him frolicking and sleeping and throwing a tantrum and his excited little dance, and I couldn’t even bring myself to delete pictures of him sleeping even though I have more than a hundred of them. 

Although, to be completely honest, keeping him drove a rift between me and my grandma. But I guess, our relationship would’ve suffered regardless of him anyway. She was hanging on to old times and reluctant to let life move on, reluctant to face changes that she didn’t want or expect. Maybe we both had mistakes, maybe both of us didn’t, but at the day, we’re family and we’re going to go through everything together. I am sorry that I lose my temper and my patience when I talk to you sometimes, and I’m sorry that I talk to you less, our conversations more superficial. I’m sorry that I didn’t include you in my life as much as I used to. But please understand, while you have no one to talk to during the day, I’ve had a long day as well, and I’m tired and drained and exhausted - a shell of who I really am. I genuinely would love to be more present when we have dinner, but my low energy and the constant nagging of stress at the back of my head won’t allow it. Please take care of yourself, because when you don’t even want to try and when you’re giving up on yourself, it’s reflected in relationships. If only you’d wake up during th day, or if you’d communicate with grandpa more, or if you’d eat healthier, live healthier, there’s so much more we can do. I’m sorry that whenever we talk about my dog, I’m always riled up and I snap at you. But nowadays, there’s so much more studies and researches on dog behaviors. We know so much more now than what you learned back in the day. Please understand that dogs are not human, however much they have evolved; please understand that our dog is a high energy dog, very excitable by nature, and I’m trying my best to teach him better manners. When you interact with him, every second is a learning opportunity. I just cannot carry another emotional weight because of the dog. I worry enough - I genuinely do. I know it’s hard to grasp how much I care and love and think of him, but at least, when I try to explain to you, please listen. “Shut up, in the oldest person in the room”, “I am always right because I’m your grandma” - all these doesn't earn you the respect you want from me. I respect you because of your past and how much you have given me, but the way you talk and the way you act is making it hard for me to build a better relationship between us. 

Having him took a toll on my academics. 274 days ago, I was still top of my class - studying, concentrating, working came easily to me. I won new awards every week, got top marks in almost every test, etc etc. But having him took a toll on my grades. I was slipping - partly because I wasn’t comfortable in my new class, partly because I was losing my competitiveness because of the people around me. Perhaps I stretched myself too thin and too tight last year that, when I let myself loose, I cannot go back to where I was before no matter how hard I try. But a big part of it was - having a dog was all too exciting and exhausting. I wanted to be the best owner and give my dog the life he deserves, but I didn’t know what it meant. Did it mean multiple walks a day, or taking him to new places every weekend? Giving him organic food, or endless belly rubs? Enroll him in puppy class or teach him tricks or let him be who he wanted to be without my interferance? Should I discipline him with sternness or only use positive reinforcement? So many worries, so little time. I resonated with myself that he is a life, and is worth so much more than my studies. If I have to repeat a class, or fail every test, then so be it. On top of that, I was recovering from an eating disorder of two years. I still don’t know was I in the other end of the eating disorder spectrum a few months ago, but I was at the highest weight I have ever been on. Bad body image leads to lack of self-confidence, and I used food as a coping mechanism. Having my dog meant that I can hide behind him. All these problems stacked upon each other, and it’s hard to solve them all at a time. But now that I think I’ve come out of the other end, I have grown more accepting of challenges and turbulences in life. I still have trouble with getting back ‘on track’ and being as successful as I was last year. But at least, now I have to motivation back and I am not held back by crippling eating disorders. 

I can’t go back and relive this year like how I wanted it to be, but I have learnt so much more about myself. ‘Tis a year of growth and self understanding and overcoming personal issues. 

[bejaermi]

Two Mondays ago Jemele Hill from ESPN was suspended for asking fans to boycott the advertisers of the Dallas Cowboys. Her tweet was in response to a new rule made by the Cowboys and Jerry Jones, who two weeks before kneeled with his team in solidarity and then did a reversal and announced he’d fire/suspend any player who kneeled during the National Anthem. Jones’s actions have now spurred a debate between owners who are conflicted over what rules to place on a league that is almost 80 percent black. [1] Like many others Jemele was upset the owner of the richest franchise in the NFL would respond so harshly to his players exercising their first amendment rights. So she went to Twitter and told people to stop buying Dallas Cowboys merchandise.

Then in response to another tweet she said fans should go further and boycott the advertisers and sponsors of the Cowboys.

For this ESPN suspended her citing that she had violated their social media policy. Seeing that they were fine with (mostly) men attacking her on her Twitter feed and saying nothing, so it seems suspect to many that now ESPN is concerned about Hill’s social media account. Unless you remember that ESPN is an actual company, and Jemele Hill is only an employee. Oh and she’s a black woman.

Hill did not start this war, she’s merely a casualty, along with Colin Kaepernick. The title of shitstarter belongs to our 45th president who, has not passed any major legislation in the last 9 months, and decided to stir up an imaginary controversy to accost the NFL and its players. The outward reasons for this war are unclear, and are only a blip in the line of idiotic things this president has done in the last year. #45 loves conflict. Whether it’s John McCain, a Gold Star Family, or little Marco Rubio, Donald J. Trump likes to stir the pot. And now that he’s commander-in-chief he owns the big spoon. As for definitive reasons on why Trump talked about Kaepernick and called him a son-of-a-bitch is anyone’s guess. Only #45 really knows why he did it. Critics have speculated that as president he’s getting back at his enemies in a way he never could before. (Trump’s hatred and/or jealously of the NFL goes all the way back to the 1980s when he was the owner of the USFL New Jersey Generals and sued the NFL for anti-trust violations.)[2] Maybe he said what he said because he needed a diversion when he spoke to the great people of Alabama, (where he was campaigning for Luther Strange, but instead campaigned for himself and possibly the 2020 election),would love to hear. Or he was just his usual Queens, NY self [3] and used a person of color as a shield so his constituency wouldn’t see that he’s clueless when it comes to how to run the country.

  Again, no one knows for sure, but the fact is that on September 23rd, Trump declared war on the players of the NFL, especially Colin Kaepernick, whom though he didn’t mention directly, the implication was crystal clear. Trump then went further and distorted what Kaepernick and other players were doing. Telling the audience that they were disrespecting the flag and shitting on America.

  “That’s a total disrespect of our heritage. That’s a total disrespect of everything that we stand for…Wouldn’t you love to see one of these NFL owners, when somebody disrespects our flag, you’d say, ‘Get that son of a bitch off the field right now Out! He’s fired!’ “[4]

  The roar of the crowd is deafening, then the chants of “USA! USA! USA!”,  start. Trump, in his candy cane colored tie and his dark untailored suit smiles like a triumphant svengali. He walks back and forth, throwing his hands in the air, as though telling imaginary political aides, “See, I told you, they’re like putty in my hands.”  Trump then walks back to the podium ready to sort of help Luther Strange. Whom everyone knows has taken a huge backseat to the omnibus that is Donald Trump and a Trump rally. [5] He was never there to help Luther anyway, he barely knew who Luther was. He just wanted the roaring cheers from the crowd and the soundbites that he knew would make the Evening News. Trump took a small issue that was really only discussed by sports journalists, black folks, and stalwart football fans and made it a national story filled with angst and hate against players who are just demonstrating their first amendment rights.

  President Trump may understand that there is a constitution, but he doesn’t like the parts that give citizens rights, except for the 2nd amendment. Protests are and will always be part of the American fabric. But protests are meant to be confrontational, they are meant to disturb and disrupt. See the Civil Rights Movement, the Women’s Movement, and the Black Lives Matter Movements. As a citizen, Trump, like Jemele Hill and Colin Kaepernick, has the right to speak his mind on the NFL. But why would a president insert himself into what is simply a labor matter. No one asked him a question like they did President Obama when Skip Gates was arrested outside his home and what eventually lead to the “Beer Summit”,[6] Trump decided to get his constituents riled up against some black boys, albeit rich black boys, but black boys none the less. While we can all agree that Trump should be more worried about North Korea, we also have to concede, that he’s not the first person to suggest that Kaepernick be ostracized, nor is he even the first to suggest that kneeling should be prohibited. [7] But unlike Hue Jackson (coach of the Cleveland Browns) who has some skin in the game, Trump’s has no skin that is remotely near the game. What he does have is a mind  filled with bile and vitriol, and his words tend to infect anyone who believes them.

After the president spoke and the Dallas Cowboys knelt during the anthem, while their fans booed, and the Pittsburgh Steelers (except for Alejandro Villenueva) stayed in their tunnel instead of standing up for the anthem and Ray Lewis did his “half protest prayer.” Fans took to their social media sites and burned Kaepernick jerseys, Steelers paraphernalia and any item that had anything to with any player that dared to exert their first amendment rights.  Yells of , “Protest on your on time!” or “I will never support anyone who doesn’t support our troops or our flag!” were pasted on websites, Twitter and broadcast on the Evening News. These same “patriots”, also went online and added Mike Tomlin to an imaginary lists of  “no-good niggers”.[8] This is what a few moments of our president’s speech moves citizens to do, not only deny their fellow citizens their constitutional rights but creates hate tsunamis.

  Which brings us back to Jemele Hill.  Jemele[9] is no stranger to bringing her experiences and speaking her mind on issues that intersect social and sports issues. A lot of her writing and reporting is similar to that of Robin Givhan of the Washington Post, who interposes fashion with social issues and the feminist gaze, giving the reader a more nuanced and fuller look at what the fashion world really is. Jemele does the same thing. In 2005 she was the only black woman sports journalist working for a major newspaper. She’s paid her dues, she spent six years at the Detroit Free Press covering Michigan State sports, where she is also an alumni. Her opinion on Sheryl Swoopes coming out as lesbian was clearly based in a feminist gaze that analyzed sports while making room for a critique about rampant over masculinity,

“Sorry, but Swoopes’s coming-out doesn’t have enough shock value to make us learn anything. Lesbians don’t pose a threat and have a certain appreciation in a male-dominated culture. And sadly, the prevailing stereotypes of female athletes as lesbians will probably reduce Swoopes’s emotional admission to a raunchy, tasteless joke by the end of the week. The only way we’re going to address homophobia in sports is if Peyton Manning, the NFL’s MVP last season, makes a similar disclosure. Or Brett Favre. Or Michael Jordan.”[10]

She also compared the Barry Bonds drugging scandal with the invisible case against Lance Armstrong in 2006. She claimed that race was instrumental in the investigation, when it was clear there was as much circumstantial evidence against Armstrong as there was against Bonds.[11] (In an Oprah Winfrey 2013 interview, Lance Armstrong admitted to doping and had his tour de France championships taken from him. )[12] You only have to look at her Twitter feed every day especially the hour before she anchors ESPNs main Sportscenter at 6p every weeknight (with her co-host Michael Smith.) Many of the tweets are vulgar, misogynistic, and openly racist in nature, and most have almost nothing to do with her on-air performance.

  Many of the purveyors of “ill will” to Jemele are white men of all ages and from all across the country.  Jemele answers almost of all of the “well wishers” individually in order to let them know their ignorance and their vileness will not and has not deterred her from spreading her what she knows is right.[13] And like many women of color, Jemele learned what was right by learning from other women in her family. In Jemele’s case her grandmother.[14]

The vein of doing what was right and continuing to speak truth to power, last month Jemele called the president, “A White Supremacist.”

  She pissed off a lot of people. She also energized a lot of folks, especially black women.

But is Jemele’s statement true?  The President and his Press Secretary don’t agree. And as a result they were the first to call for Jemele’s dismissal from ESPN.

…but I think that’s one of the more outrageous comments anyone could make and certainly something that I think is a fireable offense by ESPN.

-Sarah Huckabee Sanders  9/15/17[15]

Why is the President worried about a sports journalist? The easy answer, because she dared to say anything negative against the President. This president has the thinnest skin of any president in modern history. Which is especially astounding since president #44 was the first black president, and #43 was the president who was in office when 9/11 happened. If those presidents took the criticism that was doled out to them, why can’t Trump. The only obvious reason is that Jemele is a black woman in a very white male profession. Like racism, misogyny is a problem that America doesn’t want to acknowledge exists. Yet if the Harvey Weinstein story is any indication, we’ll have to address it sooner than later. The critics, the media, even Trump’s aides are afraid to dig further into what Trump’s racial ideology is. They can’t stomach that their fellow citizens, maybe even family members, elected a bigot. Even his own aides don’t know. In Charlottesville when he waited until his third press conference to condemn white supremacists, no one was sure whether he was just ignorant, a white supremacist or white supremacist adjacent.

In the meantime Jemele kept being Jemele.  She continued to tweet about Insecure, defend herself against trolls, and comment on social issues that intersected with her job, covering sports. Her comments regarding the president only reiterated what much of the President’s own cabinet is saying about him. (Rex Tillerson thinks his boss is a fucking moron like many of us do. A statement that Tillerson later refused to dignify with an answer, which means of course that he said it.)[16] After she called the president a white supremacist and she went to the president of ESPN and cried in his office explaining that she never meant to bring shame to the company or to her colleagues. She wasn’t admitting she existed wrong (because she’s entitled to her opinion, especially when it’s right), but she was doing what so many women of color do, recognizing an error in her delivery, but not in the substance. The way you know that your ex-husband is an asshole, you will continue to treat him like one, but you probably shouldn’t call him an asshole in front of your children.

But as her tweeting continued, NFL players had started kneeling in larger

numbers. Where her  first tweets had been born in response to Trump’s actions regarding Charlottesville, Trump’s tweets were now targeted at Jemele and how she had single handedly brought down ESPN rating. The ball was now in Jemele’s court, repsonding was never a question. The question was would her bosses have her back this time? Trump  was making statements about sports and how sports management should be carried out.  How could she resist taking him on? She’s a journalist, who has written for ESPN.com, was a sports journalist with “His and Hers,” has battled with many of the best sports writers and reporters and has held her own. She’s not merely eye candy,  the way some women sportcasters are displayed though she is incredibly attractive, has a fabulous hair/makeup team and dresses fiercely when she’s on the screen, she is the real deal. A Michigan State alumni who is a fierce Spartan fan, she can hang with the “boys” on predictions, fantasy football rankings, what an injury report can mean, and what a football formation looks like. (Yes, Cam Newton, there are actually women who know football, can wear a knee high boot, and win the sports pool.) [17] Jemele is the culmination of what happens when a young black woman decides to combine the social realities of the US with sports. She sees and understand the juncture of both and as a result she takes the mantle from male journalists like Mike Lupica, Jimmy Breslin, and William Rhoden and puts a spin on sports stories that show that the political is always personal. Trump had just made his quips and nonsense political statements personal.

  After his infamous Alabama speech,  the NFL showed a rare and swift sense of brotherhood and solidarity; by protesting against a micromanaging president who had no business trying to control them. The shows of owners and their teams kneeling, linking arms, and some not showing up at all were remarkable, if not exactly authentic. It wasn’t as if any of the owners were going to hire Kaerpernick while giving the president the proverbial middle finger. In fact, CK was almost forgotten in the two weeks after the president’s comment. Instead message became, “either honor the flag the right way or take your privileged ass somewhere else.” The term that was on many of my threads were “Oppressed Millionaires.” As though black millionaires were immune to the brutalism and microagressions that occur in America. Ask the Seattle Seahawks, at least four of their players have been stopped, detained or arrested by police for no reason.[18]

While Charlottesville was the impetus for Jemele’s first tweet, her second tweet to boycott the Cowboy’s sponsors was tied to  the backpedaling of the NFL. As of a week ago rumors were flying that the NFL was going to suspend or fine those who didn’t stand for the Star Spangled Banner. Then Jerry Jones not only backpedaled he did a somersault and said he would fire anyone who did not honor the flag or the fans. Is anyone really surprised that Jerry Jones did that? (I was more surprised he was kneeling.) Dallas Cowboys merchandise is the number one merchandise sold in the NFL shop. The Steelers, Patriots, Raiders, and 49ers are some of the other the other teams that bring millions of dollars to the owners who receive amlost all of the proceeds from those sales. Jones also backslided because the viewership and the attendance for NFL games have slipped significantly. And the lukewarm response from owners, Roger Goddell and the NFL towards scandals like the CTE coverup, deflated footballs and explicit cheating, domestic abuse, and Colin Kaepernick have made the public leary of the NFL. The public is choosing to watch repeats of Everyone Loves Raymond and the Golden Girls over the boring games that come on every Sunday night with Al Michaels and Chris Collinsworth. Jones and his fellow owners are worried. They have huge stadiums paid by taxpayers, they are their own economic tsunamis and if they lose public approval they are dead. What to do? Well take the side of the president of course.

ESPN is a company that has chosen not to examine Trump’s ideology beliefs, but instead to take the middle ground. Instead they decided to take the pussy way out and stand by their money.  Specifically they supported their advertisers and sponsors more than they did the anchor of their flagship show. a sponsor stance. There was no way that they could lose their major sponsors on their main sportscast of the day. Men came home from work to just sit in front of Sportscenter, possibly with their hands down the front of the their pants, but we can’t know for sure. The last thing that these Bud drinking, Stihl having, John Deere mowing, and Ford F-150 driving would tolerate seeing is a black woman talking about politics with their sports.  They still haven’t accepted that Jemele Hill has the job she has, now she wants them to think too? And the sponsors jumped at the chance to not take a side and instead threatened to pull their ads unless action was taken.  But one of the tipping points were the ESPN employees themselves.

If there were many ESPN employees in agreement with Jemele, it was hard to find one in the tweets and emails that were “leaked” to the press. Many of Jemele’s colleagues  were upset about what Jemele said and wanted some kind of discipline put on her. Many referred to other journalists who had been fired or “phased out” after they used words and references that were out of bounds and none of them were to the president. But ESPN has never been consistent when disciplining their journalists, Bill Simmons was disciplined when he spoke out against Roger Goddell, but Colin Cowherd wasn’t disciplined when he spoke out against Sean Taylor.[19] I’m not sure how ESPN can continue to keep up the façade of neutrality when they pay their journalist to also be commentators and opinion makers. What do you think the NFL Insiders on NFL countdown are? They may know the game, but they (Chris Mortensen, Louis Riddick, and Adam Schefter) get their information from the various NFL Deep Throats and reporting that “news” as fact. They are like the Hot Topics bunch on Wendy Williams.

And while ESPN has suspended Jemele, the NBA has not suspended Greg Popovitch, LeBron James, and Stephen Curry for their free speech about the President. Nor has the NFL (and now according to Roger Goddell they won’t) fine/suspend any of the players (current or former) who have kneeled in the past or will kneel in the future. (That’s good news for Ray Lewis, he won’t have to pretend kneel this time.) Other men have also come out for Jemele, black male sportcasters of the NABJ have come out in support of Jemele.  Mike Lupica wrote that Jemele has the right to speak her truth at ESPN. Dave Zirin has been a staunch supporter of Jemele’s writing pieces and arguing on Twitter about Jemele’s right to free speech.

Jemele felt that was inexcusable and said so. ESPN had already changed face and suspended her, for what they felt was insubordination. Yet other white male sportscasters had also called for a boycott and decried the stomping of players rights.[20]In fact many journalists had called for a boycott of the entire season, citing all the problems the NFL had including Kaepernick. But none of those writers were fired, suspended or disciplined. Again, what does Jemele have that many of the sports journalists don’t?

Let me say it loud so those in the cheap seats can hear it.

She’s a black woman.

Jemele is a persecuted woman of color, more specifically she is a black woman speaking truth to power. US history is clear about what happens to black women when they choose to speak truth to power, they are continually tormented and abused until they bend, and sometimes then break. Look up Ida B. Wells, Fannie Lou Hamer. Shirley Chisolm. Look at the women who started and continue to maintain the Black Lives Matter movement. And of course they tried to make our former first lady bend as well.

Michelle[21] was supposed to sit behind Barack and say nothing. The last first lady who had an agenda and didn’t know how to bake cookies was Hilary Clinton, and that ended very badly. Go Google, “Michelle Obama insults,” and the results are horrifying. Make sure your children aren’t in the room, because it won’t be pretty. The mild insults are about her wearing shorts, going on long trips, or wearing fancy clothes. The worse ones are when the white men of the senate told her to put her arms in some sleeves for the formal portrait.  Or when governors, city directors and other “government officials” around the country sent pictures of an ape and in one instance called it “A ape in heels.” Or when a washed up television star posted a picture that said, “He (President Obama) wakes up to this?[22] This rage and hate was aimed at a first lady whose national agenda was for children to eat well, and the Republicans said, “Bring back the French fries and chicken nuggets!”

Michelle, Serena, Viola, and Jemele also have to navigate gender. What I haven’t seen is feminist groups come out in support of Jemele and her right to free speech. Where are the white women, besides Samantha Bee? Why aren’t prominent white women standing up for Jemele? In recent years white women have done some dumb things and have advernnatly or inadvertently scrubbed women of color (in this case black women) from spaces  because they feel ignored and devalued. With Sophia Vergara being the highest paid television actress at the moement, white women may be feeling very vulnerable. Remember Patricia Arquette’s speech (that Jennifer Lopez inexpicably stood up for) that spoke of how ungrateful other folks were for the work white women did for them  and how now white women have to look out for themselves?[23] Or the dismissal of Viola’s speech at the 2015 Emmys about inequality and lack of roles for women that a soap opera actress with no accolades even close to Viola’s felt was silly and hallucinatory. Or Maria Sharapova’s recent story of Serena Williams calling her a bitch and how terrible Serena was (during the time the story had been about Serena’s new baby), when she conveniently for the terrible drag impression she did of Serena with padding that gave her a huge butt and enormous breasts. Or the idea that Ellen would create a Halloween costume of Nicki Minaj and her cotume consisted of a large ass and a bad wig. Is this solidarity? Or the silence from groups like NOW during the 2008 presidential campaign when right-wingers were calling Michelle Obama a radical black panther because of a fist bump with her husband and her Princeton senior thesis that was pro-black in nature. Or the criticism that came when Michelle said she was going to be “Mom-in-Chief” for a while in order to get her children acclimated to the white house and their new school. White women excoriated her for choosing to be a mother first, forgetting that the whole purpose of feminism is to give women choices, whether those choices are popular or not are inconsequential. And forgetting or ignoring the intersectionality that shows that for black women, staying home and not going into bankruptcy while doing it,was a radical event.

So why shouldn’t the Michelle Obamas, Serena Williamses, Viola Davises and Jemele Hills shout out loud about the inequality they see in their nation? And again why would the President of the United States care?

ESPN’s slow response to suspend Jemele was not because they were feeling benevolent or because they see Jemele Hill as irreplaceable. They were slow to make a decision because they were in a quandary. How to discipline Jemele without looking like racists and a misogynists. Could they do what they had done to Sage Steele the year before[24] and make her disappear into a vortex? No, she had spoken about the  president. ESPN hoped all of it would just disappear. It didn’t. This is Donald Trump, the most thin skinned President in modern history the White House couldn’t let it go. So they had to wait and see what happened. And Jemele kept being Jemele and ESPN finally had their opening to suspend her and if all reports are correct her contract won’t be renewed.

So who will talk about what’s right in the sportworld? Jason Whitlock, Stephen A Smith, Bomani Jones? Their columns and on air responses have run from super conservative and misogynist (Whitlock) to non committal and dismissive (Smith). What will we as sports fan lose if we lose Jemele? What will black women lose? But the person who has truly been lost in all of this is Colin Kaepernick. Remember him? How will any of this get him his job back? Can he afford to wait on others to help him or does he have to take the owners and the NFL on and fight for himself.  We’ll find out, on October 16, 2017, Kaepernick filed a lawsuit against the NFL and its owners. Claiming that the owners colluded to keep him out of the NFL and without a job because he used his 1st amendment right.

It seems Kaepernick has decided to use his 7th amendment right, the right to have a jury of your peers in a civil case over 20.00.

It’s about time.

  *************************************************************************************

  [1] https://theundefeated.com/features/the-nfls-racial-divide/

[2] https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/donald-trumps-long-stormy-and-unrequited-romance-with-the-nfl/2017/09/23/979264a4-a093-11e7-8ea1-ed975285475e_story.html?utm_term=.d7a4b6cd0b0e  Trump won the case against the NFL, but the court determined that the USFL was imploded on it’s own. Trump won $1.00. But since you earn triple earnings in anti-trust proceedings, he received, $3.00.

[3] No offense to Queens, NY

[4] https://youtu.be/vrW-GI_9IL8

[5] Luther Strange loses his bid to be re-elected despite Trump coming to save him.  Trump later tells the media, “I guess I backed the wrong guy.”

[6] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Louis_Gates_arrest_controversy

[7] Hue Jackson, the coach of the Cleveland Browns isn’t a fan of NFL players protesting, http://www.sportingnews.com/nfl/news/browns-coach-hue-jackson-against-national-anthem-protest-patriotism/1lrihp1r2yv7710y7olb8equrs

[8] http://www.theroot.com/fire-chief-says-pittsburgh-nfl-coach-mike-tomlin-added-1818808004

[9] From this point, I’m just going to refer to Jemele Hill as Jemele. That’s how us black folks do. She’s in distress and I don’t have time to be formal.

[10] http://archives.cjr.org/behind_the_news/jemele_hill_on_being_black_fem.php

[11] http://archives.cjr.org/behind_the_news/jemele_hill_on_being_black_fem.php

[12] http://www.cnn.com/2013/01/15/health/armstrong-ped-explainer/index.html

[13] https://theundefeated.com/features/jemele-hill-on-doing-the-right-thing/

[14] I too learned from the women in my family and have heard this same refrain from may of the women of color who are successful and speak truth to power.

[15] https://ww.si.com/tech-media/2017/09/13/sarah-huckabee-sanders-tells-press-jemele-hill-should-lose-job-over

[16] http://www.politico.com/story/2017/10/15/tillerson-trump-moron-castration-243785

[17] http://time.com/4970126/cam-newton-jourdan-rodrigue-routes/

[18] https://www.cbsnews.com/news/seahawks-michael-bennett-says-police-officer-held-gun-to-his-head/

[19] In 2011 Colin Cowherd made a statement about the recently deceased Washington Redskins player that not on besmirsched his character, but insinuated that because he was black and was in trouble with the law it’s no surprise that he’s dead. Cowherd made a small non-apology but was not disciplined.

In 2014, Bill Simmons one of ESPNs biggest sports journalists was suspended because of his remarks against Roger Goddell during the Ray Rice tape incident. Simmons called Goddell a liar and was suspended for 3 weeks.

[20] https://www.thenation.com/article/nfl-owners-and-espn-bosses-are-showing-which-side-they-are-on/

[21] I was going to say Shelly, but she was the FLOTUS. So I’ll just keep it to first names. Just like Jemele. They’re all my besties in my head.

[22] http://www.bbc.com/news/election-us-2016-37985967

[23] http://variety.com/2015/film/news/patricia-arquette-comments-oscars-2015-controversy-1201439814/

[24] Steele lost her coveted post for ESPN’s NBA Countdown when she made derogatory statements about the protesters fighting the president’s travel and how it was forcing her to be late for her flights. She has since been moved to Sportscenter on the Road one of ESPN level B shows. )

Sistahs, Brothas, and Presidents Two Mondays ago Jemele Hill from ESPN was suspended for asking fans to boycott the advertisers of the Dallas Cowboys.