#shin has the biggest softspot for tom.a its clear the entire heart route

[dangaer]

listening to posthumous forgiveness after ages of not playing shins playlist really reminds me of just how complicated shin’s relationship with his own father is.  

both him and his mother were strongly isolated by the town because people assumed that either shin would grow up the same way his father was or simply that his mother had been the one to instigate / create such a happening. a lot of their old friends left them, the neighbourhood kids picked on shin and his mother found it difficult to keep any form of social life. the only people who actually decided to keep by their side being both heroine and toma’s families ( though shin’s mother had guessed that more to be out of their childrens friendship for shin out of anything else, but kept such thoughts to herself ). such a situation had damaged his parents relationship to the point where his mother ended up divorcing him, and shin the majority of his childhood angry and upset towards his own father for creating such a situation, where he became cold and viewed as a monster for something he’d definitely never make himself do, and to see his mothers once happy expression become strained and ultimately haggard. 

despite this, it would be a lie to say he hates him. not to the standard he’d like people to, and definitely not in the way his mother had felt following such a situation. all of the memories shin holds of his father before the incident show him to be your average kind and loving man, who truly encouraged and wanted shin to do well as his own person. so much so, that despite the rage he felt, as shin grew up ... came to terms with attempting to understand the law, his friendships and those around him, it became clear that part of him still held a bleeding heart towards his father. so much so, from age 15, he ended up taking bi-monthly visits to his old man in prison. and while there was a lot of rage, negative and angry feelings, part of shin has come to terms with the situation, and began to try and create a sense of forgiveness towards the events that have happened.