#should i maintag this five am thought

[caligulalotus]

the next non-league team fall is gonna be for a team called the plot gang that’s just fourteen plot heavy players who haven’t fallen out yet

[teaveetamer]

I am curious, I've been watching the discourse going on for a bit without getting involved and at this point I feel like I have to ask.

What is the desired result here? Why are you engaging in the discourse at all? Clearly this is not a discussion, so what do you gain from interacting at all?

(I will send this to several people, just out of curiosity)

Alright anon allow me to explain what's been going on with me on my end.

The year is 2019 (yes, we're doing this). FE3H has just come out. I play it and rather enjoy it actually. I've got a couple of ships that I'm into, some fanfic I want to write, etc.

I go onto Reddit to chat with people about the game. Now I don't really like Edelgard, but I'm chill, I'm open to discussing the game and getting alternate viewpoints. Initially it's more or less fine.

Then some posts start coming up. People start getting really aggressive about this. I'm trying to have a conversation, but it feels like their goal is just to shout me down. I get in arguments, I get in fights, I get misgendered, I get called a bigot, I get frustrated, I get ablest rhetoric spewed at me, and I waste my life.

Stop. Take a look at myself. I'm literally sitting here arguing about Edelgard von fucking Hresvelg for hours of my day. I'm annoyed, I'm irritated, I'm always in a bad mood. Ugh.

Now it's 2020, early times I think. I resolve to stop looking at Reddit so much with regard to this game. It's not worth the hassle and the frustration. I should be, like, out doing things and having fun not wasting my time arguing with a bunch of weirdos on the internet. I want to have fun again, not be angry. I delete the Reddit app from my phone and install a blocker on my web browsers, even.

Start using Tumblr for more than just shippy stuff, and find people who agree with me, who are saying the things I've been saying. I stop feeling crazy for liking the game the way I like it. I make a few posts on my main blog but you know what, I don't really want my main blog embroiled in this shit, though I want to add my voice to the conversation. So I make this side blog.

Make some posts. I get flooded with asks from other people about the game, saying they agree with me and they're thankful that they aren't the only ones who think the way I do. I think within like a month of existing this blog had double the posts of my main blog (which has existed since 2016, so for four years at that point), most of them from asks.

The blog was initially for me to vent and throw in my two cents here and there, but I figure I'll keep it around in regular use because people seem to be benefiting from it.

Early on I tried to establish a rule for myself that 1) I wasn't going to go looking in any main tags (e.g. the Edelgard or Edelgard Positive tags) for stuff to reblog or talk about, and 2) I wasn't going to go into any Edelgard specific spaces looking for stuff to talk about (e.g. r/Edelgard or even Dimitri-critical tags). However, anything maintagged that was looking for a fight (e.g. a Dimitri-critical post in the main Dimitri tag) was fair game.

I'm not perfect, but I did try to stick to that rule. I talked about things that happened on the main FE Sub or FEH sub. I did my best to encourage my anons to not go seeking out stuff to bring back to me from Edelgard spaces. After all, this blog was meant for venting and having my own personal space where I could talk about my views without getting accosted. I thought it would be petty for me to go bring back stuff from other places.

Moving into 2021, I was kind of done with 3H. I was still getting like dozens of asks a day about 3H discourse. I'd answer one and five more would pop up in their place. By now we're like, well beyond 3x or 4x the amount of posts I have on my main blog. I'm getting kind of tired of it. It's a lot of the same points over and over and over. We're in pandemic times, so I can't even walk away from it and do something else IRL for a while before coming back to it. I feel like I'm wasting my life again. I feel like I've said anything and everything I could have possibly said about the subject. I ask people to stop talking to me about Edelgard. Eventually, everyone mostly obliges.

I still chat about it here and there, but I'm chatting about other stuff too. This blog is still about venting just about venting about more than 3H. A lot more petty fandom shit in general.

Now we're in, like, 2022. I don't remember exactly, Pandemic Time makes some of this a bit of a blur. I notice a new kid on the block, doing basically what I'd noticed happening on Reddit. Going into the wrong tags. Picking fights. Posting things in the wrong tags. Picking fights.

I'm over it, I'm done, I don't want to deal with this shit anymore. I block the dude. Most people I know block the dude or ignore him. We figure he's new here, he just hasn't learned the etiquette.

He gets increasingly hostile. I'm not really paying that much attention, just getting info about it from the fringes. Again, we figure eventually he'll just go away if we ignore him.

Then Nilsh gets harassed off the platform.

My mutuals are getting increasingly hostile anons and combative reblogs.

At this point I'm relatively unaffected. I guess because I don't tag anything, so he didn't find it.

And you know what? I'm still like "he'll get bored. He'll leave eventually." We were all like "just ignore him, he'll leave eventually."

People try to explain tags to him. Try to help him curate his experience so he quits arguing with people who don't want to talk to him all the time.

Then Moonlitboar gets harassed off of the platform. They take the URL. He's bragging about having done it. He's spreading this vitriol to other platforms and convincing others to join in on the harassment.

And I'm like. Okay. This dude isn't leaving. This is what he wants. His goal isn't to talk about this game—his goal is to hurt us.

I unblock him and respond. We go back and forth. He stops... for a time.

Here's the thing. I didn't re-block him after that, and I didn't do that for a couple of reasons. First, because at this point I'm still hopeful that he's just unaware of what he's doing, and that he'll acknowledge how messed up it was and apologize. I'm all for second chances. The second, because he's dangerous and I'm worried that if I don't keep tabs on him, he's going to try to hurt me.

It's not long until he's doing the same shit again. He tries harassing BWIIDT, he tries harassing FantasyInvader, he tries harassing Ezra, he tries harassing RandomNameless, he tries harassing Emblemxeno, he tries harassing Gascon, he tries harassing people I've literally never even heard of. I keep calling him out, and he tries harassing me. He calls me hysterical, accuses me of acting like a victim. Tries to make me feel stupid and small by saying I don't have anything worth his attention to respond to.

(By the way dude, my point about that was that you were being misogynistic but treating discourse like it was only worth responding to if it came from a man. See, I noticed that you only liked to attack people you thought were cishet white men like yourself, even if we were saying basically the same things at times. The fact that you continue not "debunking" any of my posts doesn't upset me; it proves my point)

He blocks me. I can't say for certain why, but my bet is that he realized people were actually listening to what I had to say, and having a queer woman question the actions he purported to be for the benefit of queer women wasn't a great look for him.

He's still trying to harass me. He's taking screenshots, he's using my name, he's @ ing me. He's casually lying about me. He's using sexist rhetoric implying that I shouldn't be listened to because I'm just too ~in my feelings~ and he's the true victim of my hysterical victimized martyr complex (geez, you sure a a feminist ally for that one, aren't you?)

You know, I did actual research when one of my anons accused him of being a trump supporter and tried to lie about him? I burned an entire evening on that, because I didn't want to be spreading lies about people. Meanwhile he lets his anons casually and repeatedly misgender me without so much as a passing correction, and he hangs out with people who spread lies and slander accusing others of heinous crimes.

And you know what? If I knew it was going to be like this? I'd still waste that evening and correct that anon. It's not about getting a petty win or convincing people he's a bad person for me. It's about being respected.

So to get back to your question. Why am I doing this? Because I have to. Because I know that if I don't he's going to hurt someone else, just like how he hurt Nilsh and Moonlitboar. The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior, after all. We ignored him and he didn't leave, so now we have to say something.

What's the desired result? I want to be respected, like I've tried to respect them for almost the entirety of this blog's existence. I want my boundaries acknowledged. I want him to stop hurting people for no other reason than to hurt them, because they don't agree with him.

When will I stop? When he stops.

[beepbeepbeepjeep]

Story details !!

Take 2 . smh. this one is super long so we’ll keep the additional things under the cut !!

The Magic School Jeep takes place a little over a decade after the original events of Ride the Cyclone. It follows the story of Savannah and five other strangers who just so happened to be in the same tragic road accident. Post-revival, Savannah still has ghosts of the past (and the present) haunting her. How will she deal with going from feeling as if she knows nothing, to suddenly feeling like she knows too much?

We’re also given the chance to explore the eventful lives and interpersonal issues of a whole new cast of characters, each carrying their own form of emotional baggage. 

Join them on a jeepney journey through space as they recount their lives through detailed flashbacks, touching heart-to-hearts, and a healthy-ish amount of trauma dumping. <3

By the end, they’re faced with the same dilemma. Who do they bring back? 

What will they do once presented with this decision? Why does it feel like there’s something (or someone) watching and waiting in the wings? How does this game of life and death really work? Is it worth it, in the end?

All these questions we hope to answer in a story about acceptance and healing, with a dash of humor and a sprinkling of queerness (as all narratives should have) (it's. way more than a sprinkling tbh. it's like a whole truckload of queerness). Thank you for indulging us in this already extremely self-indulgent story! We are cringe, but we are free.

additional notes!

there are different ways / iterations of the life games across time. this is important !!

even though this story is built off the events of ride the cyclone, we of course will NOT be maintagging any of these posts as rtc or ride the cyclone for obvious reasons

we view jane doe, savannah, and penny lamb as separate (but interconnected) individuals. this is for the sake of avoiding confusion.

yes, they are in a filipino jeepney. yes, this story is still set in Uranium City, Saskatchewan which is canonically located in Canada. How does this make any modicum of sense? Good question. Anyways.

Silly Interview-style Character Intros

+ ref pics! made with hellosunnycore's toon me! picrews :3 more accurate drawn ref pics coming soon ,, hopefully,, @ pastaboy. (he's the one typing this)

🌔 savannah dean (19)

she/they

5’8”

July 17

Cancer

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

Ah. Yes, I had my dollies. They sit above my bed and they all have names. Sometimes the names feel... familiar, but I lose my string of thought before I can figure out how.

Favorite musical?

It's been a while since I've listened to a musical, or music in general, but Phantom of the Opera is lovely.

What helps you sleep at night?

Uh, I don't get as much sleep as I used to, unfortunately. I know that doesn't answer the question, sorry.

🐛 beau balquenn (18)

(his hair is supposed to be bleached at the ends sob)

he/him

5’10”

January 11

Capricorn

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

Uh. Well... there's these, I guess. Butterfly earrings. They're really old. I painted them years ago. The very few who talked to me asked where I got them... I never came up with an answer.

Favorite musical?

... I am not proud of this answer but it's Be More Chill.

Can ghosts be gay?

Like the song? I'm gay and kind of a ghost, so... yeah, I guess?

🍂 tauny hep (18)

he/him

5’6”

November 1

Scorpio

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

Do I really have to answer this? Fine. I still carry an old pick around in the back of my phone. It's kinda funny cuz it's not even mine. I borrowed it from. Someone. A long time ago. Shit hit the fan before I thought to return it. It's a little scuffed now but, I don't know, I never bothered getting rid of it.

Favorite musical?

I don't LIKE musicals >:( ... Jesus Christ Superstar

First song you learned on the guitar?

There's this song, uh, Good Kid? It's pretty easy to play. I think that was the first. I don't know where it's from though. (Voice offscreen: Hey, you know that's from a musical, right?) ... FUCK OFF.

🍄 ascot mosbirm (18)

they/them

5’4”

August 15

Leo

Favourite keepsake from when you were alive?

I remember this one time I went downtown to buy a bottle of booze. I didn't really mean to, it was a-... spur of the moment thing, you know? Not like it mattered anyway since drinking laws in this shithole are stupid. I was going to save it for the day of my 19th but. I suppose that's out of the question now, hm?

(yes i know that's wine next to them in the pic shhhh - pastaboy)

Favourite musical?

Coldplay. (That's just... not a musical.) Is it not? They make music, don't they? (... well. yes. but-)

Do you get a lot of comments on your accent?

[Sigh] Unfortunately yeah. It gets a wee bit annoying at times, especially if people are being weird. Though once in a while it earns a laugh, so if it's funny I'll put up with it.

🌷 lizabel mayam (18)

she/her

5’5”

June 4

Gemini

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

Oh! Well, I don't know if this is a keepsake? But ever since I was around seven, I've carried around this little tote bag. It has all the essentials— water, first aid, stuff like that. It was pretty much a necessity back then since my younger siblings were always getting into some kind of trouble. My parents weren't always present either, with their work and other things so, I've just hanged onto it and haven't really stopped.

Favorite musical?

Do Disney movies count? (On a technicality, I suppose they have to. Any specific favorite?) Oh, I don't know, there are a lot of good ones. Um, Tangled? If I had to pick. (... Alright. At least it's not Coldplay-) Wait, who said Coldplay? (Ascot.) Awwh, of course they would. :)

Are you... you know?

... um no? I do not know? I really don’t understand what you mean.

📘 cato linn (19)

he/any

5’11

August 28

Virgo

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

... I don't like this question. But since I'm being forced to answer; I have this pen I received as a birthday present when I was 10. I still keep it in my pocket as a good luck charm and for— memories, I guess. It doesn’t even write anymore, it ran out of ink years ago. Nevermind, it’s stupid. I should throw it away.

Favorite musical?

I saw a local production of Lés Miserables when I was a kid. I can’t recall much but I know I enjoyed it. I don’t have time to see many musicals nowadays.

Favorite bone in the human body?

??? This one is just strange. Of all the medical questions you could’ve asked, why this one? Nevermind. If I absolutely had to pick, I’d say the... pelvis? It’s a rather important bone. I don’t know if that qualifies as a favourite but I’m not sure how else to answer.

☂️ “The Mannequin” (?)

he/it

6'

???

???

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

I was never alive. Though if you're asking for a keepsake, I'll have to say my hat. I can't exactly take it off, but if I could, I would feel bald. So.

Favorite musical?

The Muppets.

Favorite Muppet?

I would just like to say first that I AM NOT A MUPPET... however. I am particularly fond towards the purple one. With the schnozz.

🌒 “The Child” (10)

she/they

4’2”

???

???

Favorite keepsake from when you were alive?

Sticker sheets!! I love stickers. Especially colorful ones. I think they’re Neat.

Favorite musical?

Starship! (By starkid?) Uh, yeah? What about it? (Is that appropriate for your age?) Ummmm, no. (How’d you even find that? That’s so out of your age range.) Ummmmmm-

Favorite ice cream flavor?

The purple one! :D

Yippee! That's all, I think. If you couldn't already tell, this is all very self-indulgent. We are cringe, but we are free. :3 Speaking of We!!! Admin Introductions coming soon! probably! maybe. It's pride month and we're officially heading into summer break, so they have no excuse. 😇