#shxfting

[babyitsmagic]

@shxfting sent: "I'm just gonna sit right here... for a minute..." from ambrose for silas!!! || hidden injuries meme (accepting)

silas's attention snaps over to ambrose. he knows that tone. he's been a cleric long enough to recognize it immediately. "what's wrong?" he thought they'd gotten out of that last scrap unscathed, but maybe they hadn't. is ambrose hiding an injury on purpose or did he not even notice he'd gotten hurt? silas can see it going either way.

[babyitsmagic]

"i can't really imagine a universe where you don't make the list. but maybe it's one where i'm a little less willing to commit murder in general." he's working on that, one day at a time, but he doubts the impulse will ever fully leave. it's so ingrained in him that moving past it is proving to be more challenging than he ever expected. he watches ambrose move closer, and tries to figure out how to say what he wants to say. he's good at reading people. good enough to know that ambrose means it, even if he didn't know that ambrose can't lie. but words have always been harder for him. "i'm not always likable. there are days when i don't even like the person i am. even if i like this version of me a lot more than the old one. you might change your mind. sooner than you'd guess." ambrose has seen him on mostly good days. so has al. he has more good days these days. maybe they bring it out of him. but he doesn't know if he's good. if he ever really will be, even when he tries.

ambrose nods at the response. it’s not surprising, given how silas is, given how al is as well, but he doesn’t want to pry. al will tell him about her patron when she wants him to know and she should get to choose which details she wants to share. he finds that he’s nervous, waiting for silas to respond to his confession. maybe he shouldn’t have said it and he should have kept things light and flirty and not quite so real. but there’s no taking it back now. not when silas has to know it’s true if he can say it. he can’t play it off or deny, he just has to live with whatever the response is. and he’s already bracing himself for the denial but what he gets is much more confusing. he’s trying to figure out how to respond when silas continues and it’s not exactly the same, but it feels just as heavy. maybe even heavier. because eldath certainly isn’t going to like silas committing murder. he smiles, a little relieved, a little lovesick. “i’m honored to make the list.” he gets up and moves closer to silas, close enough to touch but he doesn’t reach out. at least not yet. “and to answer your question, i’m very sure.”

[abyssalpriest]

Astral: Learning to Project with Leviathan, 8/8/23

Learning to cause OOBEs again like I used to be actively trying to do. Lev agreed to help me practice again.

I've been a little all over the place lately wanting to get things done (energetic), but also restricted as to what I can do with sedative medication, and Lev's been over wanting to get things done. Basically I had to go to bed because it was beyond bedtime for me, but the night before I'd spent ages sitting there not being able to sleep and he felt like getting something done too, so I wanted to find something to do. I ended up chatting with him, and the topic of realxty shxfting came up. I've had comments on it (that I want to keep to myself) regarding the mechanics and what's happening on a theory level, to which Lev asked why I don't co-opt some techniques to better mindwalk and Astral project if I think they're related. It didn't end up going there, I didn't look into their techniques and I'm not sure if I will, but the realisation was sort of sparked that I used to have fun and enjoy trying to Astral project. Incidentally I can feel in the air that Autumn is coming which is aways a personal awarenss & power time for me, and it is liminal.

I asked Lev if, while he was here, he could help walk me through the process; my only experience with this was with my abusive spirit ex who controlled and blocked my ablity to project, so obviously I didn't really want to just sit there doing what he taught me. Specifically though, it's worth saying that I can get to the Astral just fine, I just want to be more consciously there and able to go over much more consciously.

Lev had me lie down, not in any which way specifically but just, as he put it, "in a position I wouldn't mind letting my body sleep in". I'm fairly alright at tuning into the Astral even if it's vague, I've sort of learned to recognise the radio station so to speak. I was lying on the left side of my bed which is open to the room, he was sat on the right side of the bed which is up against a wall or window. Outside seemed to be the same time as it was on the physical plane, the in-between period of the the early blue morning. I could reference the sky outside so easily, finally back to being connected I think which is what Lev pointed out later on. It was weird to see time line up between planes, but he said he called me to that time for a reason.

He held a pendulum above my face, just close enough that I had to move my eyes pretty drastically to follow it as he pulled it in a lemniscate pattern which I had to figure out by myself. It was tough because naturally I'd lose focus for a second or two or more and I'd have to re-find its position as it was moving to follow it again. Re-finding it was easier with feeling its position in the way I follow and investigate things as a wolf, which is reading I guess it's atomic magnetic repulsion on the air and then me around it or something, whatever it is. But I'd try both - to "see" it and to feel it - to keep up with its exact position.

I asked him if the pendulum was my citrine one because I only have one shaped like an elongated cut diamond shape and presumed he got it from my room, and he said it isn't and to look more at the colour. It was opaque and  like a desaturated meat-red bordering on pale dark magenta and he told me it was a colour that humans couldn't see..? It felt like the pale red was just some of the lightwaves given off by it and that's why it was so dull, that most of the wavelengths descended in speed below what I could see and maybe if I could see them it'd be more saturated and bright. It also seemed to have a natural crack leading diagonally from about top right to about bottom left. 

-

I was going to ask him to recount this part since I couldn't remember. He said: "This is the part you're stuck on? Of course it is. Maybe you should leave it to yourself then if you aren't ready to share."

So obviously I'm going to not do that.

It's less that I'm not ready to share and more that I think I was either falling asleep or conscious over there to the point I don't remember well. I think I need help recalling it though.

I remember at some stage he wanted to show me my reflection, and I think it had something to do with the awareness I had of myself extended out to the sky and the fact that I'd compared his pendulum's colour to the energy of twilight and hands held together - it was a comparison borne of being more connected to my usual energies which I wasn't expecting. He got up and took a mirror off the wall, I think it's still down because it feels like it's missing in the Astral, and he held it over me. I don't think I could see my anything - he's nodding in agreement as I say that - except for a blank hole where my face was and my vague body. I also noticed that although I could see details in his pendulum when I looked, I couldn't see him really at all either, and I'm not sure if it's because of some sort of face blindness or both of us just have a tendency to not want to be looked at directly unless we're in less personal forms. I say some sort of face blindness, sometimes I'm really good at seeing details in the Astral, but for some reason I have big issues with remembering and recalling what any people look like to the point that when I dream, most people never look anything like themselves in the dream bar one or two old friends, and I'm a very energy and spiritually-based person so I wonder if I have issues with peoples' forms in general. 

Anyway. This is about the extent of what I remember, excluding little things like trying to sit up in the Astral while watching the pendulum before being told to sit back down.

He's asking me if I remember afterwards as in after I fell asleep physically, which, no I don't, so he's showing me visions of it.

We were sitting there, him towards the end of the bed and me next to him both watching out the window, the sun rising. At some point he gave me a cup of tea, a brew of herbs my brain wants to say is similar to the cleansing incense I use (juniper, bay, cloves), some sort of herbal concoction meant to get my attention and to remember. He says juniper yes, or something close to it? Some sort of earthy savoury (or not sweet) berry... He's mixed it himself though. All I can see is the blue of the day sky that seeps into my own personal energy, colouring everything I do. It's similar to now where the energy of (time of the year associated with autumn) is saturating everything I'm doing now that I'm awake in the physical plane. We're talking about things, though mostly I'm trying to wake up and stay lucid. It's not like lucid dreaming where it's a huge hassle to stay lucid lest I fall back asleep into dreaming, and is instead so much closer to the dissocation I experience on a daily basis. The two are directly comparable.

What are we talking about? "Weather" he says, though I know that's code. I see little chemical-bond-chain-esque things appearing around me in the air, though like the day blue it's not actually there it just feels like it is, like pale eye floaters. We're talking about bonds between things and I'm looking at the connections between things. His voice is soft, gentle, barely carries in the air despite the fact that he's not necessarily takling quietly, he just tends to be soft. 

[mollygetyourgun]

for a wild card one, imagine if andie and dylan had a baby

Name: Taron Reece Finnegan Gender: male General Appearance: blue eyes, brown hair, winning smile he uses to get out of trouble, eyebrows with their own instagram account. Personality: A fun-loving guy who stays on just the right side of trouble. Definitely causes less havoc than his dad did growing up, but Taron is happy to stir some mayhem of his own. he doesn't want to do bad things, he just wants to live life to the fullest. sometimes, other people don't like that as much. he'll win them over though. Special Talents: Taron has better luck than he probably should. He always manages to get himself out of trouble, he has an uncanny ability to win those rigged carnival games, and he's walked away from more close calls than he cares to count. Who they like better: mom. he loves both his parents but have you met his mom? she's literally the coolest lady there ever was. dad could never. Who they take after more: dad, much to his father's dismay. he's just as likely to start some shit as his dad was when he was taron's age, but he's less likely to let it become a physical fight. sometimes he just wants to see how people will react. Personal Head canon: Taron is somehow flirting with death and always comes out the other side. he never looks for it, but these situations find him. Or fall right in front of him. I mean, how many freak accidents are normal to experience? Face Claim:

@shxfting

[bewitchedandblessed]

@shxfting sent:  “you know i love you, right?“ for danny from andie !!

they aren’t people who do loud declarations of feelings, but he still knows this already. it’s in the little things. in the soft smiles she gives him. in the roll of her eyes when he’s teasing her. the moments where they sit in contented silence together. the days where they hang out, but do their own things, happy to be in each other’s company without needing to do stuff together. in the days where they still choose to do things together, to cook a meal, to see a movie. he knows andie loves him. "i’ve never doubted it,” he answers. “i love you, too.”

[shakinthedust]

Nate leans into her when she steals her kiss, grinning wide from ear to ear. "I am too," he says softly. Nate throws his head back laughing. He knows how serious Charlotte is. She and Nina are as thick as thieves. "Hey, if I did that, she'd probably stay the weekend," he tells her. "There could be a silver lining here. Sure, I might get my ass handed to me by a tiny shrimp but your best friend would be in town for a minute." Nate snorts. "No, it's not bad. Or if it is, we're both fucked. I want there to be a beef too. Imagine the ice pun potential. Could be funny as hell. And of course we're going to pick Easy Freezy. Was there ever any doubt?"

"Yes, he really does! He gets so excited when you come hang out with him," she assures him. She thinks Nate's been as good for Chris as Chris has been for Nate. Her dad never did great on his own and having Nate check in has helped the house feel less empty. She leans up and presses another kiss to his cheek. "I'm glad you two have each other. Makes me happy to know my favorite guys are taken care of." She fake gasps and pulls away from him. "You better not say any of that to Nina! She'll probably come kick your ass since she'd never hurt me." Nina was a formidable enemy if Nate wanted to go there. "Is it bad that I hope there's beef? I feel like if it comes down to taking sides, we have to go with Easy Freezy, even if this new place is good, because brand loyalty is important. And weird, potential fronts are the backbone of small town America."

[inspirationiswaiting]

@shxfting​ continued from { x }

“I never said he wasn’t a monster, just that he could be...less monstrous, if he wanted.”

“Then I guess you have to ask-- does he want it? And does it matter to you if he doesn’t?”

[malevolentmagic]

     @shxfting​

Miguel loves his wife, he really does. But he also knows she’s terrifying-- at least to most people. And he knows his son would never, ever have left the room if it would have meant leaving his girlfriend alone with her. Which is exactly why he’s made no efforts to pull Alexi aside during dinner. Eleanor, though, has not bothered with that courtesy. She’s pulled Alexi into the kitchen, to help with dessert, though he suspects they’ll end up arguing about something one of them has done to irritate the other before they return. It could be a while. He smiles at Charlotte, hoping to settle some of her nerves at least. “She’s not nearly as intimidating as she seems. Promise,” he says, gesturing towards the kitchen. “But even if she were, Lex likes you way too much to let his mom scare you off.”

[amorbidtouch]

@shxfting

Jada had had a long day at work and all she wanted to do was some cooking therapy. Food was a comfort for everyone, but the real joy for Jada came from making it. She heard the door open and close and she called out that she was in the kitchen. In their neighborhood, there wasn’t much reason to lock doors when kids were coming and going. She turned and smiled at the familiar face. “Hey,” she said warmly. “What brings you here today?”

[babyitsmagic]

"i don't think there's anything you can do. unless you're looking for a way to become immortal," he says, offering her a bittersweet smile. "but that is... a lot. and i wouldn't ask that of you. i just... i suppose i hope that you live a very, very long life."

@babyitsmagic sent “The thought of losing you terrifies me more than any battle I’ve faced.” - kiyoshi for aislin!

aislin is quiet for a moment. she’s not a serious person. she doesn’t handle any sort of negative feelings well…or at all. still, she knows she has to try for kiyoshi. she reaches out for his hand, holding it securely in hers. “i want to say then don’t think about it, but i know that’s not even sort of helpful so…what can i do to help?”

[heartfullofxfright]

i have to figure out what blog to put her on but look!! at!! goldie!! 

[babyitsmagic]

@shxfting

"i will not be taking questions at this time. or any time. thank you."

[shakinthedust]

💕 (for Charlotte and Alex!)

meme | closed | @shxfting

You’re not supposed to spend hours a day thinking about kissing someone. It’s just not done. Well, he’s a teenage boy, so it is a little bit, but not like this. This is getting absolutely ridiculous. Charlotte is one of his best friends. And he’s starting to look like a creep whenever they’re together because he spends all of his time looking at her lips instead of listening to her words. Honestly, he needs to get it the fuck together. 

The four of them have camped out in the library. Alex is sharing his chem notes with JR. Nina is working on a composition for her music program audition. Charlotte is reading over his English essay because if he gets another C his father is going to lose his mind. Things are normal. Except Charlotte keeps tapping her pen against her lip and Alex is so fucking lost to it it’s like no one else is there. 

He’s so lost he doesn’t notice Nina nudge JR and send a pointed look his way. He doesn’t see JR roll his eyes at his behavior for the millionth time. And he definitely misses the two of them passing a note and sending conspiratorial smirks to each other. JR slams his notebook closed. “Nina and I are gonna go get snacks,” he declares, jarring Alex out of his daze. 

Charlotte hums in response, her eyes barely leaving his paper. JR grabs Nina’s hand and tugs her behind him. Alex wonders if they’re really going to the vending machines or if they’re going to go make out in the parking lot and pretend they didn’t. 

“Hey,” Charlotte says, pulling eyes back to her and back to her lips. “I don’t know why you’re so worried about this one. You’ve answered everything. Just gotta watch some of those commas,” she told him.

There’s a pause before he realizes she’s waiting for him to say something, eyebrows raised and a slight fond smile playing at her lips. That damn smile. He clears his throat. “What?”

Charlotte laughs lightly and leans closer. “Something on your mind, Alex?” she asks teasingly, her cheeks stained pink. 

He shakes his head. “Just, uh, thanks. For looking over that for me.”

Charlotte looked down like she was reading a note. “Well, I know how you can thank me,” she jokes before leaning across the table and kissing Alex quickly. She started to pull away when Alex reached up to cup her cheek and stop her. He cards his fingers through her hair and holds her close, returning her kiss slowly.

Fuck. He was never going to stop thinking about her lips now.

[babyitsmagic]

she laughs. she isn't expecting the comment at all, and she can't tell how serious heidi is being. "yes, i suppose that's a win. and also since i'm immortal, i won't even remember this in a few years. it'll be a blip in a long existence. but that doesn't make it less very fucking annoying right now. sometimes i wish i knew some magic or knew someone with magic so i could pull some strings and influence things. even though that would be immoral, i guess." she supposes she misses the power of being an angel, even if she disagrees with the whole institution. "they're both bitches, but i hope the bitchier one leaves. maybe the other one will be more tolerable without him around."

centuries too old hits heidi like a train. she knows kasia is immortal, hell she’s immortal herself, but the reminder of just how old some of these immortals always leaves her a little stunned. after all, chances are she’d still be alive even if she hadn’t been turned. she wouldn’t even be that old yet, only in her sixties. and dante’s only a little bit older than a human should be so it’s still weird to her, but that’s so not what she needs to be focusing on right now. talk about being a bad friend. “maybe one of them will quit or get fired sooner than you think. but either way, it sucks that you have to deal with them at all. i’m hoping it resolves itself soon for your sake. because you shouldn’t be dealing with such assholes. the one perk? since you’re immortal, all the stress and faces you must be pulling won’t give you wrinkles.”

[thosebrightcitylights]

@shxfting [text: Charlotte *sun emoji*] Morning Sunshine. Did I leave my stats book at yours last night?? I can’t find it

[louisianalostones]

Jasper: [Unsent] So I have a cold and every time I sneeze, I shift into a stupid porcupine so I had to miss class today because everything thinks I'm human so that sucked.

Jasper: [Sent] Did you survive the day without me?

Jasper: [Sent] Also what did we do in math?