#siderant: everytime i work on a post

[rabbitsrants]

CONAN DIES WHEN RAN CRIES

i'll let shinichi explain:

chapter 71

when i first read this chapter, i thought that shinichi was sweet talking ran to avoid her wrath, but rereading the manga made me realize how misguided i was

"it hurts me when you cry" is shinichi admitting something deeply personal, it's him explaining why ran's tears always get a reaction out of him, regardless of the circumstances, regardless of the body he's in

chapter 9

ran: is struggling with shinichi's absence

shinichi: starts calling her on the phone as himself

chapter 48

ran: is emotionally overwhelmed after the karaoke bar case, thinking that shinichi is back and avoiding her, waits for him in the cold for three hours

shinichi: comes up with the idea of talking to her as himself by turning off the lights

i love this moment so much, cause he's using both ran's love language (physical touch) and his own (words of affirmation) to ground and reassure her and it works

chapter 95

shinichi: tells ran to stop crying and ignores heiji in the middle of a case to ask her to wait for him

chapter 143

shinichi: checks on ran after using her for his deduction, drops honorifics when he realizes what he's done and defeatedly endures her tears

also shinichi: never involves her in a case to this extent ever again, even 1000 chapters later

chapter 260

shinichi: involuntary flakes on ran during their date and has to face her as conan

also shinichi: forgets he's conan for a sec as he drops the most epic lines in the manga

chapter 334

ran: is heartbroken cause it's valentine's day and shinichi's still gone

shinichi:

puts the jacket on her when she falls alseep,

reaches out to her as himself

and eats her chocolate

just to get her to smile again.

chapter 479-483

ran: supsects conan's real identity again and feels like he's completely out of reach even though he's so close

also ran: stops suspecting him but still expresses feelings of emotional distance to shinichi

shinichi: gets a second phone just for ran

and carries it with him wherever he goes.

chapter 727 (white day)

ran: starts crying because she thinks shinichi didn't get her anything for white day

shinichi: goes out of his way to draw attention to his gift so she stops crying

(LMFAO, he's so extra)

chapter 743-752

ran: feels like her feelings for shinichi are one-sided, is absolutely devasted, runs off crying

shinichi: drops his current case, runs after her

and confesses his love for her, so she never doubts his feelings for her again.

chapter 884

ran: is frustrated by all the misfortune shinichi brings

shinichi:

in conclusion, shinichi only has two weaknesses: aptx 4869 and ran's tears. and the funniest part is that aptx didn't even kill him like it was supposed to. ran's tears on the other hand? i believe they possess great power. enough power to kill shinichi?

visit the shinran library for more

[barsformars]

cheers to the new year ✨

originally, i wanted to make an appreciation post on the 1st of january to welcome the new year on a nice note, but i decided that it would be nice to wrap up this year as well.

this year has been an unfamiliar and tough one for all of us and i just want to remind everyone that you are loved, and that just being alive is enough. you are enough. you have done well and i am proud of you, and i always will be.

to everyone who has been tagged below, you have made my 2020 a much better year just by being on my dashboard. even if we don't talk much, i really appreciate your presence on this app because it makes it feel like home — safe and warm. thank you and i wish you all a prosperous and kinder 2021 💞💝💖💕💘✨

my tumblr family, the ones who adopted me in the first few months i was on here and has constantly supported me and made me feel loved, for that i am eternally grateful. // @queen-of-himbos @soulangel @mooneylooney1 @vicapuleti @yangcaffeine @kpophours @daybreakx @bangteen (tho she's not on here anymore) @justasouthernlady @astrohawritings

to the moots that i really look up to and love interacting with (if you're not tagged here and we're pretty close, your message is down below <3) // @yeochikin @thelargefrye @hereisleo @moonchildsaurora @yunhozone @rosy-wooyoung @yunhoway @ateez-little-star @atinykidult @lsangyeons

to the ones that ive talked to for a bit and, or, the ones that i admire ALOT from a distance <3 // @hwanami @seacottons @floraisann @yeocult @brathyuck @hongism @inkigayeo @hwacinth-main @sweetheart--sannie @dimpledsatan @treasure-hwa @toffee-hwa @tinymingi @shining-red-diamond @aasthrielle @petitemingi @sidereal-fantasies @masterninjacow @yunwoo (im sure there are many more but my brain never fails to fail me)

to the ones i love seeing on my dashboard and have been a familiar blog since the start (or near there) but whom i never got to talk to // @mingyus-lavish-thighs @changbinniez-princess @yeollieinwonderland @hey-i-really-miss-you @seoultraveller

individual messages 💖

@closer-stars my number one 언니, the (older) sister i never had, the hongjoong to my seonghwa. i don't remember when we started talking but im pretty sure it was about dance jdjsjsjs i am forever grateful for you and i think ive grown a lot ever since i started talking to you as well. thank you for putting up with me even at times i find myself super annoying hehet 👊 hopefully 2021 will be a much better year for you and we can one day meet up to dance together 🥺

@fairyofdusk sweetest person ever. i know we don't talk much or interact directly with one another but i think ive mentioned many times that i just really appreciate seeing you on my dash and whenever you like my rubbish text posts jdjsjs or just reblogginf things off each other blogs uk, thank you for making my 2020 so sweet, i hope that 2021 will be 2x as sweet as you to you love ya!

@jeongyunhoed DENISEEEEEEEE; always pushing the barsformingi agenda i swear- you're one of the dearest people to me on tumblr and just your presence alone makes me feel safe and warm. i really love your works and i hope that in 2021 you will reach more milestones! (+ please don't stop tagging me in mingi posts, love ya!)

@sugarrimajins HELLO; I don't see you very often or talk to you often but somehow everytime we do we can talk for quite awhile? i think i really vibe with you energy and i just wanna say i really appreciate you and our conversations, wishing you a great 2021!!

@fortrest MY NEW FRIEND; forreal we only started talking very recently but i somehow kinda vibe with you alot and i really enjoy our conversations! you seem like a really nice person and i cant wait to build a stronger friendship with you in 2021!

and to all of my followers,

i don't know if you will even be reading this because it's at the bottom of this post but if you do see it, i want you to know that i appreciate every support that you give. i enjoy reading the tags in your reblogs and it motivates me to write more as well <3 i am so grateful everytime someone says that my works make them happy and i hope to do so as well in 2021!!

alright, i think this is the end of the post. i am so so so sorry if i accidentally missed out anyone but the main message still stands! i hope that 2021 will be a much better year for all of us!!

- from rin <3

[penwarriorssss]

Captured written by Kizza Yvanne Barrera and Denjie Mae Gomez

             Unfamiliar faces surround me, except this one face, one face that I once made beautiful memories with, the face that I’ll never forget in my entire life, and the only face I’ll always adore. It was him. He looked just the same when I first met him, same clothing style, same hair, same figure, but never the same person. 

           It was wayback in summer of 2006, I was consumed by the silence and emptiness in my room, so I decided to go out. I grabbed my essentials including my little happiness which is my Polaroid camera. My feet brought me to a wonderful place called Intramuros. There was something about the place that attracted my soul. As I explored the whole area, I reached Puerta Real Gardens, luckily I witnessed a wedding, it was the part where the couple were exchanging their vows. I was moved by their promises to each other. It was a good scenario to capture. Finally, I found a meaningful moment to capture on that day; sadly, it was my last Polaroid film so I did my best to find the best angle to capture it. I was about to click the capture button, unfortunately, this one annoying, irritating, but charming guy, ruined my almost-perfect last shot. Instead of having a photo of the wedding, I captured the guy who blocked the focus scene of my camera. I was in rage at this moment that I bursted out my feelings and yelled at this guy.

                         "How dare you ruin my last shot without apologizing?" I said furiously as my fist tightened. 

                        “What did I do wrong? I was only doing my job as a photographer of this wedding. How about you? Don’t tell me you’re here to stop the wedding?” he replied with sarcasm. 

           I was about to reply with his words but he unexpectedly handed me a small box which contained 10 pieces of films, and then he left without uttering a word. I went back home and I noticed that I am still holding the picture of the guy in the wedding. I decided to throw it away but there’s something that stopped me from doing it. I don’t know why but I posted it on my wall of films.

         The other day, I was scanning my phone, looking for another spectacular place to hop in and take a shot. My body was electrified in shock when I saw a wedding invitation of my ultimate best friend, Jasmine. I hurriedly dialed her number, when she picked up my call, I confronted her.

                        “What are you thinking? Are you sure he changed? That he’ll never leave you again for another girl?” 

          Yup, my best friend married her long-time jerk boyfriend who once shattered her heart into pieces. 

                       “Can you please calm down? He proposed to me and promised me with sincerity that he changed for the better. I trust him”

           Jasmine and I chit chatted for almost an hour, it’s been years since she flew to Canada. It was the last time we saw each other. 

                       “So are you in?” she asked. 

                      “In? Of what?” I was definitely confused about what she meant. 

                      “Being one of our wedding photographers.”

           When she spoke these words, it felt like my soul left my body out of excitement. It is really my dream to cover weddings of my loved ones. 

                       “I’ll lend you my camera but please care for it like your baby” she added. “Aye! I’m in.”

           It was the day of Jasmine’s wedding, it was a white wedding so I wore my white polo shirt designed with a tiny camera print on the left side, which I bought the day before the wedding and paired it with my blue denim skinny jeans and leather top sider shoes. From the wedding church up until the reception, I looked so exhausted for the reason that I really did my best in finding the best photo angles.

                        “Sorry I’m late. Had camera problems at the last minute but now it’s fine.”

 The voice. I recognize the voice.

           As I turned my back, I saw the guy I met in Intramuros. Again. I got annoyed. Again.

                        “Why in the world are we wearing the same color of polo, with the same design!” I yelled at his face.

                       “Am I your menstruation? It seems like everytime I appear, you get mad? But for your information, you are not the only one who can afford this polo.”

             Our conversation ended when it was time for the slicing of the cake by the newlyweds. The irritating guy approached me again.

 “You go in front of the couple and make sure to have a wonderful shot of them                 slicing the cake.” He said as if he was my boss.

             I followed the command of my feeling-boss. I took as many good shots as I can and I am happy and proud of what I got. I went to his spot and showed him my shots.

                         “I’m speechless. You are great.”

             My eyes widened when he said those words. It lifted my spirit in pursuing my passion which is photography. It was weird. I felt butterflies in my stomach; no one appreciated my works like he did. I asked him to show his shots but he refused. Me as a spoiled-brat-ass woman, grabbed his camera. I was surprised by what I saw, which made my face as red as a tomato. Most of the photos were my face.

                         “Are you stalking me?” I teased him.

                       “Don’t be shy; I know you have a crush on me. Just admit it. I don’t bite—

             I looked at the ID hanging on his neck.

                         —Tyler.”

             Tyler covered his face but I can see his face turned red. It was the beginning of our story but it led to shattering of our hearts. It was my fault. Throughout our relationship, I never gave him my full trust. He was a good partner and I wasn’t. I was insensitive and inconsiderate of his feelings which made him feel tired.

             It was the end of what we had.

             Today, he is dressed so neatly wearing his best suit. He is waiting at the altar while I am slowly walking on the aisle. Everyone wears their best smiles when I face them, it’s my job to capture these smiles because I’m the photographer. The tall and thick door suddenly opened, everyone’s attention was on it. It is the bride. It is Tyler’s bride. She is wearing white, well-made, and elegant gown which made her stand-out from everyone else. I look back at Tyler, he got the face of a man that is sure, happy, inlove, and excited about marrying the love of his life.

             It is now the time of exchanging their vows. I was in front of them to make sure I get the best shot, just like what my feeling-boss told me before.

                         “I, Tyler, promise to be worthy of your trust—“

             He faced me when he said the word ‘trust’; it was the word that was lacking in our relationship before.

 —and love you until my last breath. I’ll be forever grateful that God gave me you. I love you.”

             That should be me; I should be the woman that Tyler gave his vows to. This put me to a realization that Tyler really deserved this woman.

                         “You may now kiss the bride.”

             Everyone is shouting, clapping, and some are jumping out of joy. As their lips touched, my heart died on the spot and I could feel the tsunami tides in my eyes. As the wedding ceremony ended, Tyler approached me.

                         “Thank you, Zoe.” He widely opened his arms and gave me a hug.

                       “I’m happy for you.”

             It was my last words before I left the church.

             Few years later, I came back to my old hobby which is finding a place to get some good shots with my old friend, Polaroid. What happened in my life before is a part of who I am now. Time does not heal everything, acceptance does. I already accepted the fact that Tyler and I are destined to meet each other, but not meant for each other. I am content with what I have now. If ever the right person for me will come, I will never make the same mistake again. I will be better.