#silly chonkli

[dragon-ascent]

hello i'm sorry to disturb you T_T. but i just had this thought that Chonky Zhongli founds himself being caught by enthusiastic chefs— he finds it entertaining how Liyue chefs can't somewhat tell that he eerily looks like Rex Lapis and they're about to cook him!

obviously, he won't let himself get cooked. if anything goes south, he will be ready to flee— leaving the chefs in awe of how the rare creature escaped from their grasp. his lover doesn't share the same entertainment, and really thought that Zhongli was weakened and ready to be eaten for dinner. so there they were, a flimsy slipper in hand and whacking those chefs in discipline. screaming about how dare they cook their..... "lost pet".

when all else is said and done, his lover asks why he didn't just transform (or escape).

"I was about to, darling. yet I saw you coming from far away just to save me. so why not–"

WHACK

Haha, adorable!! Li is totally the type to sit around and stew (no pun intended) in a dangerous situation just to see how far things can go. His poor partner worries about him, despite him being a whole god and all that good stuff, but to him these things are just amusing. :P

And I feel like Zhongli would make the "lost pet" thing a running gag-

[dragon-ascent]

Chonkli witnessing you hugging a dragon plush of himself and getting jealous so he starts hopping about, trying to get your attention

There is nothing snugglier than a plushie - your Rex Lapis exuvia plush is exhibit A. Squishy little thing it is, and so so fluffy, how could anything be better than this?

Your husband, however, is of a differing opinion. He's currently in his chonky little form, running around you while you're hugging your mere non-living replica of him, trying so hard to be the one you would rather snuggle today.

The poor lil dragon rawrs, pawing at you - but you're kissing the plushie like it's the love of your life. Chonkli climbs up and settles atop the bookshelf and stands on his hind legs, waving his forelegs around in a way that's meant to be fearsome and impressive...except he's just a soft little baby.

You start cooing, and he perks up, thinking he's got your attention now - but you're just melting at the way the plushie's tail is flexible enough to wiggle! With a squeak, Chonkli hops down and wags his own tail in hopeful affection. He wags it faster and faster until it feels like his tail might propel him into the air.

Oh, and it does! Weeeee, goes the little dragon, hovering in midair thanks to his tail velocity, and finally you look up at him and go, "Wow!" tossing aside your plushie to cuddle your helicopter of a husband.

[dragon-ascent]

Playing with Chonkli is fun. Playing with Dragonli is...scary?

When your husband's in his tiny chonky form, playing with him is fun!

You can pick him up whenever you want, despite his squeaky protests! Happily cradling him, you give him lots and lots of loving scritches.

Silly outfits! You get him a little skirt and frumpy ol' roast chicken hat, snickering as he waddles around miserably, wearing some baby shoes to boot.

You blow bubbles, laughing as Chonkli dances around on his hind legs trying to catch them. "Pop them all, I know you can do it!"

When he's in his long dragon form, the roles reverse and you're the adorable little thing to play with...

He picks you up whenever he pleases, which in itself is alright - but then he tries giving you scritches, and you see his claws and panic. "Darling, no! Wait! Waaaaait!!"

Zhongli had once purchased a sketchy-looking maid outfit...which he tries to get you to wear along with the ugly chicken hat, citing that it would only be fair. When you refuse, he chases you around like a crocodile.

He uses his energy to summon little meteorites that float around aimlessly, trailing fiery golden stardust in their wake as they drift along. "Go on, break them," he prompts eagerly, tail thwacking against the ground in anticipation. "I know you can do it."

[dragon-ascent]

More propeller Chonkli thoughts so...

Imagine giving your chonky little lover tons of affection: the usual smooching, snuggling, squishing, petting, and scritching. His tail naturally goes haywire, wagging without rest.

Except it gets faster and faster and before you know it, Chonkli's lifted himself off your lap and is hovering in the air. At first this makes you giggle, and you're cooing about how adorable and silly he is.

But this makes him even more excited, and weeeee! His propeller-tail goes brrrr and he's floating higher and higher. Now you're panicky.

"Eek!" You reach out to him, leaping and waving your arms in futility. "Come back, darling!"

But off he goes into the sky like a balloon mistakenly released, propelled by his tail. His tongue is out in a blissful blep as he journeys ever upward. Who knows, perhaps he may land on the moon.