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#so I apologize for any splashback
medinaquirin · 8 months
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Listen, I know - I know - that the entire idea of women essentially having a shelf life is some jacked up misogynistic bullshit designed to sell face creams and get women to get married and pump out babies as early as possible.
It's bullshit, and I am fully aware of this.
That being said, teetering on the cusp of 40 with no partner and no career and no degree of higher education and basically twisting in the wind with nothing to show for those 40 years besides quite a lot of mental health issues...feels rather bad.
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screpdoodle · 3 years
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Duality - Chapter Six (The Tick, Tick... Boom)
Kaos pulled the white rubber gloves up to his forearms, rubbing his hands together before pulling his goggles down over his eyes. He surveyed the beakers and flasks set before him, the same ones as on everyone else’s desks. Clear liquids and purple crystals in petri dishes. This looked to be an experiment Kaos was quite familiar with, and the one he had hoped for today. It was the exact base for the catalyst that he needed. Droppers and scoopulas were set off to the side, along with a handheld mortar and pestle. Kaos looked up to the board, where the teacher was just finishing up transcribing the instructions in fluid cursive. She brushed a permed curl behind her pointed ear, then plopped down at her desk, a book in her hands moments after. The other students had already started following along, immersed in their own little worlds. Grind the crystals into a fine powder. Kaos grabbed a handful of shards, dropping them into the mortar. They sounded like wind chimes as they hit the stone bowl, twinkling softly as Kaos used the pestle to grind them down. Well, tried. After a few moments, his hand began to cramp up, the crystals barely having cracked. He huffed, looking around the class. Surely, someone else wouldn't notice if he switched their mortar for his own. Kaos’ gaze came to fixate on the Ent a few tables down from him, their attention captured by the vial of clear fluid they were fumbling with, gnarled hands cracking the glass with absolutely no effort. Kaos’ expression soured, a prickle running up the back of his neck before the vial shattered, liquid splattering over the table and their oaky chest. The teacher looked up as the Ent started wailing, stumbling out from behind their desk and rushing for the door.
“This is the third time this has happened…” Kaos heard the teacher grumble before heading out after the Ent, leaving the class to fend for itself.
Kaos blinked, then hopped down from his seat as the chatter returned to the classroom. That timing couldn’t have been better. Kaos made his way over with mortar in hand, making sure not to be seen. Carefully, he switched the two out, being sure the Ent hadn’t ‘contaminated’ the crystal powder before quickly making a break back to his desk. Now, he could focus. Mix a few drops of activator into the powder. Mix until it forms a paste. Kaos piled the dust into a petri dish, picking out a few leaves before pouring in a few tips of the clear liquid. As soon as it touched the crystals, a plume of smoke curled up into the air. Kaos used his gloved finger to mix the substance around, ignoring the growing heat against the rubber. It didn’t take long for the dust to form into a granular paste. He flicked the extra on his finger back into the dish. Mix the paste in with the rest of the activator. Kaos tipped the paste into the flask, covering his face with his arm to defend against splashback, then began mixing. The clear liquid faded to a pastel purple, bubbling. Now. Now was the time. Kaos took his lunchbox out as the flask frothed, flipping the metal box open to reveal nothing but a napkin and some crumbs. Checking to make sure no one was watching, Kaos pulled on the napkin, removing the bottom and revealing a few thin vials filled with multicolored substances, all tethered to the real bottom of the lunchbox with thick bands of elastic. Kaos first slipped out one who’s contents seemed to pulse and glow with every movement, like lightning coursing across an overcast sky. He popped the cork off, then dumped the entire vial into the beaker, the substance sloshing over the sides a bit as he stirred it in, pooling around the base. Kaos waited for a second, until the static gathering in the air had cleared, then carefully grabbed the smallest vial from his lunchbox. Contained within it was a thick, crimson liquid. The very thing he had spent countless hours toiling over last night. Milking out every last drop of nectar he could muster by the light of the moon. He had spent weeks preparing, tracing their patterns in and out of Mother’s special garden, finding the exact time they were at their most active. The time they produced their best nectar. Beelossoms. A very rare breed that cultivated a very flavorful honey, but when unprocessed, the creatures used it as a defense mechanism. One that caused exploding pustules on any living being it was injected into. Kaos couldn’t help but let his hands shake as he popped the vial open, tilting it over the bubbling maw of the flask. He held his eyes open wide, not risking even a blink, holding his breath as to not jostle the substance. He just needed one drop. Just one. Single...
Plop.
Kaos pulled the bottle away, shooting his hands into the air in triumph as his grin widened. The muted lavender liquid began shifting to a deep copper. It was at that moment the door flung open; the teacher stomping inside, the sudden arrival causing Kaos to yelp. He bumped the table as the two of them locked eyes, the concoction sloshing over the sides. Kaos’ triumphant grin turned to one of sheepishness, then to one of concern as he noticed the flask frothing and bubbling more than before. Before Kaos could take cover, the liquid erupted into a cloud of coppery dust, flooding the air, the other students coughing and spluttering in alarm. Seconds after, alarm began to blare,the sprinklers coming on overhead; flushing the rust colored smog to the ground. In a panic, Kaos grabbed the flask, covering it with his arm so the remaining liquid didn’t get diluted.
“Apologies, miss, I have to go! I really gotta use the washroom!” Kaos spoke hurriedly as he pushed past the teacher, running out into the hall, the sounds of panicking students and his teacher’s yelling nothing but background noise to his thoughts, rust-colored dust trailing after him as he made a break towards the meeting spot.
“Benevolent Ancients, what happened to you??”
Kaos glared at Dyskord as he stopped to catch his breath, attempting to wipe the copper dust from his face. His goggles were resting on his forehead, a ring of uncovered skin left around his eyes. His clothes hung off of his frame, drenched from head to toe in freezing sprinkler water and rust-colored sludge.
“Chemistry is a dangerous thing, numbskull. But that doesn’t matter. Did you bring the-”
Before Kaos could finish his sentence, Dyskord threw a small, metal cage to the tiled ground at Kaos’ feet. Like his communicator, it seemed to be constructed of scrap metal and miscellaneous parts. Kaos let a grin creep across his face as he knelt down to pick up, ignoring the harsh, jolting movements it was making. He held the cage up to the light, inspecting its contents. Contained within it was a small, verdant ball of razor-sharp teeth, pink gums, and stubby limbs. Its eyestalks swiveled around as it tumbled around the cage. When it noticed Kaos peering at it, it lunged forward, gnawing at the metal bars between them. Kaos yelped, jumping back, a little bit of liquid sloshing other the lip of the flask. It bubbled and fizzed as it hit the tiled ground, evaporating almost immediately.
Click click.
Kaos looked over, a quick flash of light causing spots to dance across his vision. When it cleared, he saw Dyskord, snickering as he looked over a developing photo, a small camera clutched in the other. It was a camera Dyskord had had since Kaos was little. He remembered Dyskord running around the house, shaggy blonde hair in his eyes and the clicking of the shutters as he filled rolls upon rolls of film. It was a hobby that had slipped to the wayside as the years flew past, but Dyskord always made a point to bring his old, outdated camera along on their little ‘adventures’. Whether it be exploring the grounds behind the castle, an unsanctioned midnight outing to a ‘nearby’ market; or, apparently, to document Kaos’ humiliation at the jaws of a caged Chompy.
“What do you think you’re doing!?” Kaos hissed, dropping the cage (much to the Chompy’s dismay) and storming over to Dyskord. He reached up, trying to grab the photo from his brother’s grasp. To no avail.
“Oh come on, baby brother. It’s a great candid shot!”
“It’s humiliating, you bumbling buffoon!”
Dyskord merely pushed Kaos back, ruffling his hair in the process, chuckling to himself. Kaos snarled, then took a breath, gathering himself together as he readjusted his clouded goggles, shooting one last glare over to Dyskord. He then thrust his hand forward, beckoning for something.
“Whatever, we need to hurry. Your backpack. Hand it over,” Kaos demanded, motioning with his outstretched hand.
Dyskord swung his backpack off of his shoulder, but simply clutched it to his chest like a child would their favorite stuffed toy.
“And let you get your grubby, science-covered prints all over it? No way!” Dyskord stuck his nose in the air. “It’s limited edition!”
“It's a cloth sack you painted on. Quit being a baby and give it to me!” Before waiting for an answer, Kaos set the flask down and grabbed ahold of Dyskord’s backpack, tugging on it with all of his might before it slipped from Dyskord’s grasp, sending both it and Kaos stumbling back. He fell to the ground beside the caged ball of chlorophyll and teeth, not waiting a beat before zipping it open and rummaging around inside; much to his brother’s chagrin. The Chompy rattled around within its confinement, eyes watching as Kaos threw miscellaneous items from the bag. Sheet music, a half drank bottle of water, what once looked to be a sandwich bag but was now full of white and blue fungus, the list went on.
“Could you at least try to be gentle??” Dyskord begged as he dodged a haphazardly thrown wrench, gathering up what he could as Kaos searched the contents of his bag, blatantly ignoring his wishes as he threw a bag of expired ‘timebombs’ at Dyskord’s head. “I don’t treat your toys like this!”
“They’re collectors edition action figures, not toys!” Kaos retorted. “Besides, most of this is garbage anyway. Didn’t Mother already get on your tail about keeping your bag clean? It attracts Greebles!”
“Oh, and the fact that you hid one of their egg sacs in the wall doesn’t?”
“Zip it, fool.”
Kaos dug his hand into the bag one last time, finally pulling out a small, plastic box with a triumphant a-HA! He draped Dyskord’s bag over the Chompy cage without a second thought, popping the plastic box open and carefully removing what was inside. A crisp looking syringe, the silver tip almost glowing under the buzzing fluorescent lights. Giggling to himself like a schoolgirl, Kaos reached over and grabbed the flask, being careful not to spill any more of a liquid as he balanced it on his knee, priming the needle before dipping it into the substance. He filled it up to about halfway before tapping the end like he had seen done countless times.
“I still have no idea how you got your hands on one of those things,” Dyskord mused as he picked his backpack up, oblivious to the damage the Chompy had managed to do to one of the straps as he slipped the contents back inside.
“Getting detention from the bio teacher has its perks, brother,” Kaos shot a grin towards Dyskord before getting to his feet, his eyes fixated on the shimmering liquid suspended within the syringe. His own formula, his own handiwork, and soon all would bask in its masterful craftsmanship. Kaos cracked the cage open with his free hand, grabbing the Chompy by its eyestalks and lifting it into the air. The Chompy flailed its stubby limbs, snapping at the air with countless rows of razor sharp teeth, thrashing around much to Kaos’ amusement.
“So. Infodump to me again. This stuff is supposed to do what exactly?”
“It’s quite simple really.” Kaos cleared his throat as pulled his glove up his forearm, only for it to slip down again almost immediately. “I, KAOS, have created an ingenious formula, taking the natural properties of Blazing Beelossom nectar and the secretion from sea dwelling thunderslugs found only in the dark depths of-”
“Layman's terms, Kaos. We don’t have all day.”
“I mashed two highly dangerous goops together with some powder to make a boom boom liquid.”
“Smartass.” Dyskord puffed, crossing his arms. “What I don’t understand is, like, why do we need the little bugger? If it’s ‘boom boom liquid’, why not just spill it and let it do its work?”
Kaos snickered, pressing the tip of the syringe against the side of the Chompy’s bulbous head, causing it to freeze in place, simply dangling there as its eyes fixated on the needle. “Because, my idiotic brother, it only reacts when in contact with a living organism. The serum is dangerous on its own, yes, but not explosively so. See, if my theories are correct, this concoction should latch onto the living organism on a molecular level, causing a chain reaction which should, if my calculations are correct, cause it to spontaneously combust. Now, this is no regular spontaneous combustion, oh no-”
“Spontaneous combustion is a usual thing?”
“Hush. Let me finish.” Kaos inserted the syringe as he spoke, the Chompy squealing like a chew toy, before falling completely still, like a fawn caught in the headlights. Absentmindedly, Kaos pressed down on the plunger, the liquid draining into the Chompy, its verdant flesh starting to fade into an apricot orange as it filled with the deadly chemical. “As I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me, within half a minute for a creature of this size, its molecules will begin to ‘vibrate’ to an extent where they can no longer hold themselves together, causing the creature to explode like a living atomic bomb!!”
Kaos cackled, then paused, catching himself before it got too loud. He looked over to Dyskord, whose expression had become sunken, the corners of his mouth twitching as he eyed the Chompy. Kaos managed to soften his maniacal grin, pulling his mind back to reality.
“Though, eh, the effect is less potent the smaller the creature it latches onto. Which is why we’re using the ‘humble’ Chompy. Big enough to cause some damage, but not enough to, you know, completely demolish the entire island.”
Dyskord didn’t take his eyes off the Chompy hanging from Kaos’ grasp, which had begun to bubble, blisters forming on its squirming skin, the syringe hanging from the side of its head. Kaos followed his gaze, his heart stopping.
“...how long did you say it takes for the ‘boom boom juice’ to kick in?”
“Thirty seconds, approximately.”
“How long have we been talking?”
Kaos glanced to the nonexistent watch on his wrist. “...I’d say around twenty, twenty five seconds, per se.”
“So. We’ve got ‘approximately’ five seconds to ditch the living death sentence and hightail it outta here?”
“I believe so, yes.”
Kaos looked back to the Chompy, who had begun to drool, steam curling off of the dribble. He tried to peel his hand from the eyestalks, the flesh stretching and clinging to the rubber glove like orange putty. Kaos held back a gag as it flopped to the ground, then staggered to get up, his mind grinding to a stop as the Chompy gazed up at him. Then, it clicked.
“Wait. Oh fu-”
Before Kaos could finish his sentence, the Chompy burst apart in a blast of blinding light, engulfing everything around it.
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