#so by the time i graduate i'm going to be 27 (no money no prospects lol) with no driver's license no savings no plans no apartment -

[non-un-topo]

Worrying I'm developing a case of senioritis, not in the screw-this-I'm-just-not-going-to-do-it way, but in the holy-shit-can-I-please-finally-just-be-done way

[bear-and-gainer-story-archive]

I Was 27 Pt. 1

I was quite a nice sight for anyone who likes boyish looking young men.. 27 years old, handsome, blonde hair, green eyes, great skin, 175 pounds, and a winning smile. I had graduated from college when I was 23.

Though job prospects were plentifull, I settled into something boring. I worked as a financial consultant for alot of well-to-do clients. I was not a gym bunny by any means, but I kept a very svelt body. Working out 3 times a week kept me feeling and looking good. Since I was 13, I knew that I was gay.. That didn't settle well with me since I was raised as a good Catholic boy in a very small town, so I kept my sexual desires to myself. One day at work, I was bored and ready to go home, when my boss walked into my office and announced that I had a new client that needed to invest right away.

"Sure," I said, wanting to hit him, "no problem at all." I stood up from my chair to do the respectable hand-shaking "hello-what-can-I-help-you-with," when an older gentleman walked through the office door. He was about 65 years old, very dark brown eyes, strong physique, though he had an obvious hefty gut. He had a thick, full beard, which had retained a nice black mustache, but became grey outside of that. His eyebrows were still very dark, and I saw a remarkable resemblance to Sean Connery, though this man was definitely heavier. He had a double chin, and looked very much like those "portly" gentlemen you see hosting something artsy on BBC.

His face was still very handsome, though all signs of youth were gone, except for the remaining black hairs in his mustache and eyebrows.. He had what I always called a "horse shoe" head of hair, which is no hair at all on top, much like Patrick Stewart, the "Star Trek guy," as I always called him.

"Hello, Mr. Young, my name is Mr. John Danvers. I heard that you were a great consultant with an eye for making investments pay off. I'm here to make my investment do just that," he said, as he shook my hand.

"Nice to meet you, Sir. Please sit down," I responded. He sat down with a slight grunt as he sat his 300 pound body down on the chair before him. Mr. Danvers had the obvious appearance and demeanor of a very wealthy man. He lit up his pipe, which looked very natural on him, and began to smoke as if he'd been smoking pipes for the better part of his life. "I hope my smoking doesn't bother you, Mr. Young. I'm afraid I've been quite attached to it since I was a young man."

"Not at all," I said, "but the office is a smoke-free environment. However, I won't say a word. What can I assist you with specifically, Mr. Danvers?"

He looked at me as if he were sizing me up and down, like he was inspecting me. There was a long, uncomfortable pause, and he finally spoke. "I would like for you to come to my house tomorrow night and go over a few things together. I would like to invest both my money, and my years. I know that I'll be happy with what becomes of the two of us. In fact, I guarantee I will. You, however, might not expect just how interesting this might become."

What in the hell was he talking about? I had no idea, but I agreed to meet him. "Very good, Mr. Young, I'll send my car to pick you up here when you end your day. Also, take my advice, go and work out, enjoy your night. If I'm correct, you will never have the same existance again."

I was completely curious and lost with what this man said. Mr. Danvers handed me $1,000 dollars in cash and advised me that it was an advance, and said he was very confident in my abilities. At first I tried to refuse the offering, but he insisted that I take it, and insisted that I use the money to go out and have one hell of a great time. "Take that money and go wild with it. Enjoy the spending, and, most of all, enjoy your youth. I am very confident that you're going to become a very wealthy and changed man very soon, and you can leave this hum-drum office once and for all. You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

I smiled politely, and agreed to use the money the way he suggested it. He might have seemed a bit odd to me, but I could tell that this man was exremely sharp and I somehow felt that he was serious about my becoming rich. "Very well then, Mr. Young," he concluded, "I'll have my car pick you up tomorrow at 7 pm sharp. I told your boss that I would be consulting with you all day tomorrow, and he agreed to let you work away from your office tomorrow so you can have a full and wonderful day. We don't have to tell him that the next 24 hours are just for you, right, young man?"

I smiled and realized that since today was Thursday, that meant I would have the first 3-day weekend in a very, very long time. I left for the gym, then had the best 24 hours I could ever remember having. I ate at the best restaurant I could find, went out dancing, which is unlike me since I work so much, then went on a shopping spree the next day. Man, I had an awesome day! When 7 pm was approaching, I got ready for Mr. Danver's car to pick me up. I put on my new clothes after a refreshing shower, and felt better and more alive than I ever had. There was an amazing sense of anticipation welling up inside of me at the thought of what great things Mr. Danvers had in mind that would be so prosperous for me. After all, people come to me to make themselves richer with the vast wealth they already have.

The car arrived, and the driver greeted me at the door. I got into the limmosine and off we went. After a very scenic drive, I saw Mr. Danver's mansion for the first time. "Wow!" I could not help but blurt that out loud. The driver smiled suspiciously, as if he knew something that I did not. That mansion was one of the most incredible things my eyes had ever beheld. I will spare you all of the descriptive stuff, because it was so overwhelming, I'd never do it justice by writing it down. Just visualize a very large, secluded, and beautiful mansion with the most fabulous landscape you've seen in your life. Upon entering, I was struck by the sight of the marble floors, gorgeous antiques everywhere, and a huge library, which is where the driver said that Mr. Danvers was waiting for me.

As I entered, I noticed that my new client was sitting in a large leather chair, peacefully smoking his pipe, and reading a book. He had on a pair of reading glasses, and I couldn't help but admire the sight of him. He was up in age, heavy-set, but he was the picture of a man so relaxed, content, and happy. "Good evening, Mr. Danvers. This place of yours is beyond magnificent. I have to say that I can't wait to colaberate with you on your idea, whatever it is."

"Well hello, there, young man," he said as he puffed on his pipe and smiled warmly. "Please make yourself comfortable. Clarence, my butler, is bringing us some brandy and a few things to eat as we discuss business and pleasure. Take a seat, my boy."

Pleasure? Had he said pleasure? 'Oh, no,' I thought. Is this a sex meeting? I'm not sure that I could have sex with this man, even though he is, and probably always has been, a very handsome man. I tried to put my weird thoughts out of my head, when Mr. Danvers brought me back to reality. "Mr Young.........," he began, but I interrupted. "Please just call me Aaron. It may be in a stuffy and formal kind of business, Mr. Danvers, but I'm still just a guy."

"Very well, my boy, then you can call me Edward. I may be a rich and rather, ahem, mature, but I'm just a man." We both smiled at each other as if there wasn't such a vast differance between the two of us. I felt right at home. Clarence had brought us a rather large cart with goblets, silver food containers, and in a very elegant way. It looked like there must have been enough food and drink on that cart for 6 people, not two men.

Mr. Danvers poured us both a glass of brandy and raised his drink to the air.. "A toast, my fine young friend." I lifted my glass to his. "To youth," he paused, "and to maturity. May the two cross over the other and make amazing things happen." I can't explain to you how much of a natural bond I felt towards this man, but I knew it was there. I felt comfortable, at home, and, above all, so relaxed! "Aaron, my boy, this night is going to see the end of all of your current worries and concerns both financially, and in all things obligatory. If all goes the way I feel that it will, you will be respected, admired, and never have a need to struggle to earn the money to travel the world in style. You'll never have to attend meetings, answer to anyone but yourself, and you will never again feel that you have to go to the gym and torture yourself to keep up appearances with the superficial gay crowd. I've done some checking on you, Aaron, and I know that you're a very high quality young man. You've worked hard, been responsible, and you have a very level head, a truly nice way to see the world through the eyes of a young man who has more going for him then most many years older than yourself. You're very attractive and yet, still so humble. I have selected you to get what you always dreamed of having."

I could not believe what I was hearing. He filled another pipe, lit it with such serenity, and sat closer to me. Still, I was wondering if he were going to make a pass at me. For some reason, I stopped thinking about our age differance, and thought more about the fact that not only was I incredibly relaxed, but I could not help but notice how much the years had been good to this man. He was such an attractive older man! His deep and commanding, yet gentle voice was almost intoxicating. Curiosity got the better of me and I felt my inhibitions slipping quickly. I had to ask him the first question that popped into my mind. "Mr., uh, Edward, why and how did you select me for these things that you're saying? I've never met you, and you already seem to know alot about me. Are you wanting me to.........."

I stopped myself before I asked him about the sex thing. "Am I just trying to sleep with you, Aaron? Is that what you wanted to know? Well, then, the answer is no. I find you very beautiful to look at, but I'm interested in your body in a way that little to do with a motive to just have sex with you. I want you to relax and stop thinking about that, and then we can proceed without such incorrect notions. To answer why I selected you, well, you look like the kind of young man I've wanted to be for a long time now. I feel a connection with you. Why do I know so much about you? The answer is simple. You helped a very good friend of mine three months ago. Perhaps you remember a certain Mr. Johnathon Briggs? He was one of my best friends." I gulped, not because I remembered the man of which he spoke, but because he said was a good friend.

"Your boss, Aaron, is a crooked man. He has treated his employees unfairly, embezzled money from unsuspecting people, and has gotten away with it......so far. You were assisting my good friend on some very promising monetary ventures when you realized that there was a problem. Your boss shirked your concerns off, and removed you from the client's account. You then went behind your boss's back and called Mr. Briggs and told him to pull his money out of your firm. You knew that someone was taking money from several people's accounts, and you knew that even though it looked good, it was completely bogus.

You, Aaron my boy, saved my friend from going penniless. He told me all about it. He told me about how young, handsome, and honest you are. Sadly, Mr. Briggs passed away three weeks ago. He died in his sleep, and left the world peacefully. Because of you, his money remained unscathed by your scheming boss, and that money is building two hospitals for poor and underprivaledged families, and is providing for his remaining relatives for the rest of their lives. That would never have been possible had it not been for you."

I was stunned. "It's amazing how such a small effort, your honest soul, and your clever mind can make such a huge differance, isn't it? You have a mind way beyond your years, Aaron. I can help wisdom and age meet, and you will also be rewarded." Still, I didn't understand where he was going with all of this. He suddenly stood up, looked me in the eye and announced that we were going out for a cocktail. He said that he wanted to change into something more casual, as he was wearing a formal suit that looked as if he were going to meet the Queen of England.

When he returned, he was wearing a nice three piece suit. It was hardly what I would consider more comfortable, but it was more casual than what he had been wearing. As we got into the limmousine, he instructed me, "Aaron, we're going to a very cozy gay bar that is much differant then the ones you're used to. The crowd is generally older, and they are all very real and descent people. I think you'll like it. If anyone asks, just tell them that I'm your Grandfather, OK?" I chuckled a bit, then agreed. "Besides, Aaron, being old enough to be your Grandfather isn't such a bad thing, is it?" "Of course not," I responded. He winked at me, and said, with a warm and mischievious grin, "Good. You'll be like me before you know it. I want you to think of my age as something you could enjoy."

When he said those things, I still had no idea of where he was coming from. I took them in stride. We arrived at the bar. It was what can only be described as Glitzy. We went inside, and I noticed how well everyone was dressed. Even though I was wearing my brand new clothes, I paled next to the upscale clientelle that filled this bar. We sat down and ordered a brandy, and got comfortable. I noticed that across the room, the most beautiful man I'd seen in my life was sitting alone. He looked our way several times while Edward and I talked about my life. He seemed to want to know everything about me. I answered all of the questions as they came, but was so distracted by this hot man who still kept looking in our direction.

Edward excused himself and I sat In my seat silently, waiting for his return. A minute passed and someone tapped me on the shoulder. It was the hot guy from accross the bar! I tried to gain composure when he spoke to me. "Excuse me, but I just wanted to introduce myself. I'm Jim." I thought I'd pass out. He was so incredible. He must have been about 5'9, dark hair, large brown eyes, and of medium build. He looked to be about my age. I invited him to sit down with us. "I could not help but notice the two of you. Is that man you're with your lover?"

I gulped my brandy extra hard. "No, he's my Grandfather." His face lit up as he smiled broadly. "Is your Grandfather gay? I mean, is he, does he have a boyfriend, or a wife, or something?" "No," I said. "Why do you ask?" He looked at me with such enthusiasm. "Well, I think he's HOT! I've always liked older men, I hope I'm not offending you." I assured him that I was not offended, but I was very surprised to see such a young guy interested in a man Edward's age.

I WAS 27 (part 2)

Edward returned from the bar and noticed that we had a new guest seated with us. I introduced the 2 men, and I could tell that Jim was very attracted to Edward. "I love the aroma of your pipe. I've always found pipesmoking men very hot."

Edward smiled and winked at Jim, and we all conversed politely for the next hour. "I plan on coming back to this bar a week from tonight if you would like to meet me here and join me," Edward said to Jim. The much younger man beamed a brilliant white smile back at Edward, and we said goodnight to Jim and left to return to Edward's mansion.

We went back to the library and got another brandy, as Edward sat for a few minutes smoking his pipe and silently looking at me, as if he were contemplating something very deep in his head. I drank some more of my brandy, and began to feel very nice. I felt so happy and relaxed, it was like a small dose of euphoria.

'I must have had more brandy than I should have,' I thought to myself. I broke the silence. "That guy Jim seemed to really like you. Were you interested in him?" Edward smiled. "He was a nice young man. What did YOU think about him?" "I thought he was very attractive. But he was too busy admiring you to give me much attention," I said.

"Aaron, you'd be surprised how many beautiful young men are attracted exclusively to men my age. Some are into what they call the 'daddy/boy' thing, others like older men just because they find other young men too immature, there are many, many diverse reasons as to why that is."

"So, Mr. Dan...sorry, Edward, what is the idea you wanted us to discuss? I'm really curious." He got up from his chair and went to get a different pipe from his vast pipe cabinet, and sat back down. Sure, let me get this pipe ready first, then I'll tell you all about it." He reached for his tobacco. "It's important to fill the tobacco just right for a pleasurable smoke. first you fill it, then gently pack it. Then you fill it loosely again and you pack it down again to where the tobacco springs back like a sponge when you press down on it."

He reached for his lighter. I was a bit perplexed as to why he seemed to be almost giving me a lesson on how to fill and light a pipe, but I really liked this man. If he wanted to take his time enjoying our evening, then great. Edward then began to instruct me on how to light and puff on a pipe. I politely listened to him. He sat back in his chair and took a nice sip of brandy.

"Aaron, what would you think if I offered you the opportunity to own this mansion, and half of my money?"

I choked on my brandy and almost spit it on the carpet. "Excuse me? I don't think I heard you right." "Yes, Aaron, I would like to make a personal arrangement with you, and you would get my mansion, and half of my full assets. I'm worth about seven hundred and fifty-million dollars. That doesn't include my mansion. It and all of the treasures contained here are worth more than one hundred million dollars. I'm not telling you this to try to impress you. I'm honestly saying that by tomorrow morning, Our deal can be sealed and done forever."

I could not believe my ears. My heart began pounding and I started to sweat when I saw that the expression on his face was absolutely serious. He grinned at me and I noticed how he was sweating a little himself. I noticed that the top of his bald head had became even more shiny than before. Edward stroked his thick beard as he looked at me and seemed to be contemplating again.

"I don't understand," I broke the silence again, "what you're saying sounds amazing, and you look serious, but what deal are you talking about? What would I have to do? Is there a hidden camera somewhere?"

Edward laughed heartily at my questions. "No, my boy, there aren't any cameras. I'll get to what I want, but first, let me ask YOU a few more questions. I'm almost as nervous as you are, Aaron. This is a big decision, and once we make it, there's no going back."

I was all ears. "My young friend, what do you think of an older man like myself? I mean, do you pity a man my age and consider him to be 'past it,' so to speak?" "Not at all. I think older men are lucky. They don't have to work, they do what they want, and I've always respected them. I look at you, and I could only hope to look like you when I'm your age. You look healthy, and I think you resemble Sean Connery, my idle. He's five years older than you, and he's still one of the sexiest men around." I was still wondering where this was going.

"I'm glad you think that, Aaron. Tell me, would it bother you if you were as big as I am? I mean, if you were told that part of your wealth came from it?"

What a weird question. I stared at him and looked at his rather large gut and pondered. Finally, I asked, "Do you mean would it bother me being heavy like you if I knew that being bigger would be the reason I was wealthy?" He nodded. "That would be part of it. Let me just come out with it.. You look very confused." I was very ready for him to make this all clearer. "My boy, I want to trade places with you. I would like give you half of everything I own, if you'll agree to swap with me. You would stay here and live your life of luxury, and I would go out and travel the world in the manner I've wanted to for many years."

I was stunned by what I was hearing. I poured another brandy. A BIG glass of brandy. He continued, "On my computer over there, all I have to do is click a button, and your new bank account will be set up. I wouldn't have to change the house deed. That wouldn't need changing, it would just be yours. It's really that simple. All you have to do is agree, and also agree to a few exchanges we would have to make tonight to seal the deal and let the magic begin."

Swap with me? Trade places with me? I really didn't think Mr. Danvers could be crazy, but he sure wasn't making a lot of sense. His series of questions were blowing my mind. "Sure, Edward, if I could live like you do, of course I'd do it. Why not?" I really wasn't sure if I was humoring the man, or if I was talking from one too many glasses of brandy. Still, I really was serious about the house and the money, but this is reality. I'd never take advantage of an older man with strange notions. I liked Edward. "I couldn't take half of everything and your mansion for just agreeing to swap places with you, Edward. What would I do to deserve this?"

Edward began to laugh a little, as he rubbed his big belly. "My boy, you would definitely deserve it. Your life would be radically different. You wouldn't be the Aaron you know, you'd be like me, but this would be your home. What do you say, young man? Could you handle being me?"

I thought about what he was saying, and, after I chuckled a bit, I answered, "You got a deal, Edward, buddy. Let's toast to it." Edward was beaming and he raised his glass to mine, the ever-present pipe clenched in his teeth. He gave me a great tour of his mansion and told me a lot about the place. It was almost midnight, and he hurried us back to the library. He grabbed another pipe and opened a cabinet. There was a safe in there, and he was dialing it and then digging in it.

He pulled out a purple velvet box and sat in his chair again, only a small lamp table between us. He opened the box and revealed the vials of clear, green liquid that were inside. "We have to drink this together and say a special toast at the same time. Are you ready for that, young man?" It's not more alcohol, is it? I don't think I could handle it."

Edward chuckled. "No, Aaron, this stuff is quite different, although I can't even to begin to guess what's in it, but it cost me an exorbitant amount of money. I've been waiting for someone exactly like you to share it with." He removed the vials and poured the contents into two silver goblets. He puffed on his pipe as he stood staring at me for a moment, then he smiled again. "When we hold the goblets in the air, say, "Kaprophka Trans doheeshka." I laughed at those words, saying that I'd had too much drink to be able to say my ABC's, but he said we could practice a bit.

It was twenty minutes before midnight, and I finally got it right. "Good then, let us now toast." He raised his glass above him and I did the same. We said the words in unisone. Kaprophka Trans Doheeshka!" We clicked our goblets together and drank the liquid. It was unbelievably delicious. It was warm and tingly all the way down my throat. Not like alcohol, but much more nice. I could tell that Edward liked it, too, because he was smiling just like me. I felt the liquid hit my stomach, then I felt it go down even lower! The sensation continued down passed my belly button, then to my groin area. Suddenly, and quite beyond all control and reason, my cock swelled to a full erection that was throbbing to get out of my pants. The erection seemed as if it took only 5 seconds to get that hard, but there it was. I then found myself uncontrollably aroused. I had never felt more horny in my entire life! This all happened in a matter of seconds!

I looked at Edward and noticed he was supporting himself on the mantle of the fireplace. He let out a quiet, but very deep baritone moan. I looked down at the man's pants, and immediately noticed that he had the same 'problem' that I did. He then opened his eyes and stood straight up. He looked at me with a very strong look of lust. I couldn't help it, but I was full of the same lust.

What in the hell was happening? What did we just drink? These questions fled my thoughts just as quickly as they had come, and all I could think about was getting off. Edward and I were both breathing very heavily. "There's one more thing we must do to seal this. We have to give each other a sacred part of ourselves."

Man, I was hot! "What do we do?" I asked as I looked at the amazing bulge in his pants. "Come here, Boy. Lay down on the couch and take off those clothes. Hurry. Do it now, boy, and do everything I tell you to." I complied immediately. I found myself on the couch without a stitch of clothing on. Edward kneeled down next to the couch and started sucking my hard cock. Oh, man, it felt so good. He sucked my cock expertly, as I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. The cum was welling up from my balls, and I felt them pull tight up against the base of my shaft. It was time to cum. "I'm cumming!" I said very loudly. I shot spurt after powerful spurt of cum into him. He didn't let up, so I could tell he was swallowing every drop of my juice. I was still cumming! It was the longest and most volcanic experience of my life. Finally, after what seemed like forever, I stopped shooting into his mouth.

I lay back panting, but found that even though I had just shot my load, I was still just as aroused as I was before. Maybe even more. "Get on the floor and lay over the couch with your ass facing me. Bury your face in the couch while I bury my cock into your hole." His voice was so deep and so powerful, I found myself complying with his every word. I quickly assumed the position. I could hear Edward removing his clothes. "I'm naked now, boy. Now I'm gonna give you what you want. Oh yeah, you're gonna love this, boy."

He sounded so different. He sounded like an extremely horny and controlling man. I felt his very large cockhead press against my hole. Then the most painful sting as he thrust what was obviously an enormous and thick cock into me. After he was all the way in, I felt his balls slap against my ass cheeks. "Yeah, boy, you're gonna enjoy this cock. It'll give you pleasure for the rest of your days. Everyone you use it on will like it, too, trust me."

I wasn't sure what he meant, but the pain was turning into the hottest, most pleasurable sensation I ever felt, so I didn't really pay to much attention. I was just enjoying getting fucked by this man. He pounded his cock into me again and again, until I could tell that he was about to cum. He was grunting and moaning like a mad man, and I suddenly felt his cock grow even thicker in my ass. He tensed up and let out a loud sound as I felt his very large, but manly and powerful body collapse on top of me.

Then I felt it. He shot deep inside of me like he wouldn't stop. I felt every spray of his cum begin to fill my ass. I had never felt like that in my life! As he squirted into me, I felt my own cum spill onto the couch under me. He was still laying on me, and I could still feel his cock buried inside me. The clock struck midnight. I heard every chime as if it were so loud and penetrating, but pleasant at the same time. I loved the feeling I was having with him just staying inside of me so much, that I wished the clock would never stop. After the clock stopped sounding, he slowly pulled out of me.

I just layed there for a few minutes, and I could hear him getting dressed. I rolled over and opened my eyes and looked at him. We were both smiling. Edward handed me a robe and told me to go shower, as it was time for sleep. I did just that. He showed me to my room, and looked me square in the eye as he said, "Aaron, you're going to sleep very heavily tonight, as I will. When you wake up, you'll be a whole new man. I'll be in the next room. Sleep well, and when you wake up, you'll be a very rich man. Sleep well, young man," he said as he rubbed his hand all through the hair on my head. "That's the last time you'll feel that sensation on your head. I't not so bad, though. It's very low maintenance, you'll see." With that, he left me to sleep. I didn't even think of all the words he had just said to me, I just wanted to sleep.

I WAS 27 (part 3)

I heard an alarm clock sound somewhere in the distance. Even though I really wasn't awake yet, I could consciously discern the fact that the sound of the alarm was mingling with a dream I was having. I was at a really high class shop that sold extremely expensive men's formal suits. Some man approached as I was being fitted by someone else down below me. The approaching man was smiling at me while he put a lighter near my face. I had a pipe in my mouth and this strange man was lighting it for me. I puffed on the pipe as if I'd been craving it for hours.

How strange.....I've never smoked a pipe in my life, and I was enjoying the hell out of it. Then came the sound. It was a very loud screeching noise that emanated from the dressing room behind me, and it got louder and louder until it seemed to be right in my ear.

With a very loud boom, I was suddenly opening my eyes and staring at the ceiling. 'Holy shit! What a vivid dream,' I thought. It was as if I could still taste the pipe smoke in my mouth. I yawned and started to stretch my arms above my head. As I exhaled, I let out a loud and sleepy groan. The sound that came from my throat was way deeper, more baritone than any sound I thought I was capable of making. 'Must be all the alcohol last night. Sure, my throat's raw.'

I felt a cool breeze on my head as if my scalp was naked. As I was reaching up to scratch my head, I noticed that the blanket covering me made a loud abrasive sound as it scraped across my chin, except I barely felt it. In fact, I noticed that something hairy, thick and black was under my nose. My fingers began to touch the skin on the top of my head as I.............'What the fuck!?' My thoughts and everything I knew as the reality of waking up came to an incredibly abrupt halt as I realized multiple sensations and observations all at once. Not only was that scratchy sound of the blankets a very thick beard on my face, which I could never grow in a million years, but there wasn't a single hair on the top of my head and the thick, black woolly thing under my nose was a huge mustache!

I tried to fling myself out of bed, but as soon as I raised my shoulders from the pillow, the weight of my body forced me right back down. I reached down to my stomach where I felt the tension, and my gut was huge! Even though I was laying flat on my back, the gut I was looking down at sat perfectly up and rounded like I had swallowed a beach ball.

My eyes were wide open and I began to breathe as if I could not get enough air to my lungs. I always had a tendency to hyperventilate when I get really freaked out, but even though I was panting heavily, I was breathing just fine. I rolled over on my side and grunted loudly as I got out of bed. I was completely naked, and I looked straight down at what was my body. I couldn't see my feet at all on account of this big belly sticking straight out. Shaking, I walked toward the large mirror which was on the other side of the room. There is no way I can possibly describe to anyone how strange, no, how TOTALLY DIFFERENT my entire body felt with every step I took.

It wasn't hard to walk, but I felt so heavy, so stout, and somewhat more slow-moving than I had ever felt. As I approached the mirror, glimpses and verbal recollections from the night before began to flash across my mind. ".......... My boy, I want to trade places with you. I would like give you half of everything I own, if you'll agree to swap with me................... All you have to do is agree, and also agree to a few exchanges we would have to make tonight to seal the deal and let the magic begin.................. Your life would be radically different. You wouldn't be the Aaron you know, you'd be like me, but this would be your home. What do you say, young man? Could you handle being me?"

I was still approaching the mirror in this enormous room, when all of these words from last night swirled through my mind like a foggy haze stirring in the breeze. Then, with a feeling of an anchor plummeting down to my new stomach, I remembered three words: "Kaprophka Trans doheeshka." 'Am I dreaming this,' I wondered. 'No, the dream was the clothing store and that damn alarm clock! I know where I am. Oh my god! He was serious! We weren't playing around!'

These words and all others that were running through my brain were immediately silenced as I reached the mirror. There before me was Edward's body. I was Edward! With my eyes open wide and my mouth weighing down to the floor, the image staring back at me was over sixty years old. I was every bit the man who was my host last night. The man who invited me over for a "business proposition."

I used Edward's, uh, my hands to feel every inch of what I was looking at in the mirror, as if I thought Edward was standing in front of me mocking my every movement. I ran my hands along my bald head. There was only a bent horseshoe fringe of hair growing around just over my ears reaching around the shiny head. As one hand felt the satiny smooth skin on the top of my head, the other was running thick fingers through a very big and full beard and mustache. The black in the mustache turning salt and pepper, then gray as it spread across my cheeks was even more prominent then I remembered as I had looked at Edward the previous night.

Then I ran those huge hands across the very hairy chest, along the enormous belly, and down to a very large cock between these legs that were as thick as tree trunks. Huge balls hung low like heavy pendulums under the long, thick cock. I had known that Edward's cock had been very large by the feel of it from last night, but something else was odd about it. It looked so different from the penis I had been used to for the past 27 years. There was skin covering its head. It had not been circumcised! I had never seen an uncut cock in my life, and now there was one between my legs! This was beyond crazy.

I reached down and pulled the skin back. It was such an odd, yet very pleasurable sensation. I felt the head of this huge cock as I stretched the skin back with my other hand. I swear there was way more physical sensation on this cockhead than I had ever felt on my "own cock." I froze as I stared at the whole picture of what, no who I had become. 'I'm an old, bald, overweight man! I'm huge!' Just to make sure that I wasn't completely out of my head, I slapped my face. I decided to speak. "What did he do to me?"

Yes, as I thought, that voice that came out of my mouth was deep, extremely masculine, and not mine. I'm not sure how much time had passed as I stood there, but I was brought back to my senses by a knock on the door. It took me a little while to answer, but I finally mustered a, "C'min.....uh,...yeah?"

The door opened up behind me, and I turned to look. Standing in the doorway was my 27 year-old body smiling back at me. "We did it, Aaron. You're a very, very rich man now. It feels a bit odd right now, doesn't it?" Looking at my own self and hearing my own voice speak to me as I stood in Edward's body made everything hit me all at once.

"Sit down, Aaron. You're shaking." Edward went to the closet and grabbed a bath robe and approached me. This was a complete mind fuck! I knew it was Edward, but it was my body! My own body was speaking in a way I never did, walking differently then I ever did, and using facial expressions that clearly were Edward's mannerisms. "Aaron, first we need to get you relaxed. We have much to go over during the next month. Right now, you're in shock."

I sat down, and he handed me a somewhat large pipe that was obviously full of tobacco. I took the pipe from him and put it in my mouth as he fired up a lighter above the bowl. "One reason that you're shaking is that you need your pipe. Your body has been an avid pipe smoker for decades, and pipes are going to be an almost constant companions to you now. Trust me, you're quite used to it.

He was right. I smoked it like I had in my dream. As I smoked the pipe, I was feeling more and more calm. It was almost a mild feeling of euphoria that swept over me. "That's it, Aaron. You're doing well. Now you know why I gave you that small lesson in pipesmoking last night. Don't worry, old man, I'll teach you everything you're gonna need to know and your life is going to be lived any way you want it from now on. The only difference is that you'll live your life as a much older, portly, and rather handsome man, if I may be so bold to say." He smiled and winked at me as he said that.

[raefill]

I would legit love to hear you answers to every single question. I don't know if you feel like actually doing them all, but if you did... I'm JUST SAYING I'D READ THE ANSWERS, ok.

1: Is there a boy/girl in your life?Yeaaaah but my romantic prospects are pretty bleak tbh, I graduate and move away in a few months

2: Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?No, not really. But I’m not mad about it anymore.

3: What do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”CUTE BABY CLOSE BY !!!!!!!!!

4: What’s something you really want right now?to cry, i’m having the big sads

5: Are you afraid of falling in love?always

6: Do you like the beach?i love the beach!!!!!!!!! i grew up in a seaside town, the beach feels like the best parts of home

7: Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?yes ?? it was cramped and uncomfortable 

8: What’s the background on your cell?the photo of me, san, kahl, chez, frau, bagel and spags in the louvre

9: Name the last four beds you were sat on?mine(right now), Thea’s, Lizzie’s, .. Keir’s?

10: Do you like your phone?yeah but i’d like it more if the screen wasn’t so cracked

11: Honestly, are things going the way you planned?lol no, it’s definitely not

12: Who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?i genuinely don’t remember !

13: Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler?rottweiler, i love dogs that look a little mean but have big hearts

14: Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?pffffft, that’s hard to answer but i’d say generally emotional, most of the time it’s harder to get rid of emotional pain

15: Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?both ?! i want to support the breeding of endangered animals that happens in zoos and see the cute animals but also i love a good rembrandt ?!

16: Are you tired?exhausted

17: How long have you known your 1st phone contact?since i was born

18: Are they a relative?my mother!

19: Would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?not a fucking chance

20: When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?a few hours ago, i think

21: If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?i don’t believe there’s a way to know nor do i think love works that way

22: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?hell yeah i would

23: How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?none!

24: Is there a certain quote you live by?“if you make bad choices, own them” - my dad 

25: What’s on your mind?god, everything, idk im having a high key anxiety day

26: Do you have any tattoos?one pretty big one on my thigh

27: What is your favorite color?black !!!!!!!!!!

28: Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?maybe tomorrow, we’ll see how it goes

29: Who are you texting?uhhh, no one? everyone is asleep

30: Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?yes

31: Have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?all the time, my gut rarely lies

32: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?yes, his name is keir and he’s one of my best friends

33: Do you think anyone has feelings for you?i mean i’m dating someone so i fucking hope so

34: Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?no ? i dont think ? i’ve had people say they’re big or the colour is interesting but idk

35: Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?i’d cheer her on

36: Were you single on Valentines Day?yes

37: Are you friends with the last person you kissed?yes!

38: What do your friends call you?rae ?

39: Has anyone upset you in the last week?yes

40: Have you ever cried over a text?pffft, yah

41: Where’s your last bruise located?my knee

42: What is it from?i fell over my own computer chair

43: Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?today

44: Who was the last person you were on the phone with?my mum, i think

45: Do you have a favourite pair of shoes?not right now, most i just wear my plain black docs

46: Do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?no, i just tie is back

47: Would you ever go bald if it was the style?no, i really dont like my ears, idk why

48: Do you make supper for your family?yeah, my mum and step dad can’t cook

49: Does your bedroom have a door?ofc it does? what kind of bedroom doesn’t have a door? get these pretentious loft bedrooms out of my face

50: Top 3 web-pages?tumblr, ao3, youtube

51: Do you know anyone who hates shopping?plenty!

52: Does anything on your body hurt?period pains are all the rage today

53: Are goodbyes hard for you?yeah but i don’t tend to cry until they’ve already left so i look like i take them just fine

54: What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?water......... this morning

55: How is your hair?fine? a bit damaged from the cold weather

56: What do you usually do first in the morning?wish i was still asleep

57: Do you think two people can last forever?yes

58: Think back to January 2007, were you single?i dont fucking know

59: Green or purple grapes?GREEN or get out of my face

60: When’s the next time you will give someone a BIG hug?tomorrow~

61: Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?yes

62: When will be the next time you text someone?tomorrow!

63: Where will you be 5 hours from now?probably in bed still, but asleep

64: What were you doing at 8 this morning.sleeping

65: This time last year, can you remember who you liked?no, i was getting over the end of a four year relationship

66: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?no

67: Did you kiss or hug anyone today?no

68: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?this sucks

69: Have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?many times

70: How many windows are open on your computer?ten! and they’re mostly your fics corey, go figure

71: How many fingers do you have?ten

72: What is your ringtone?i dont know, my phone is always on silent

73: How old will you be in 5 months?22 ~

74: Where is your Mum right now?sleeping in bed probably, idfk, she lives hours away

75: Why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?we grew up and grew apart but we were still okay until i had about four-six months of depression where i had to stop myself from doing something stupid daily and he didn’t notice despite us living together and sharing a bedroom (and those times i told him and he shrugged)

76: Have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?yes

77: Are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?yes! i still love them very much

78: Do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?annabelle

79: Is there anyone you know with the name Mike?yes, there’s some grad students in the psych department called mike, they all look kinda the same too

80: Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?yeah, i miss being able to do that regularly

81: How many people have you liked in the past three months?more than i can count, my polyamorous ass has a crush on about seven people currently

82: Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?no

83: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?i’m talking to one of them

84: You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?i’d literally never do this

85: If your BF/GF was into drugs would you care?depends which drugs and how often, no one cares about a joint every few months

86: What was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?i spilled my popcorn and managed to hide that i had spilled it from my date pahaha

87: Who was your last received call from?my mum, wow it sounds like i talk to my mum a lot more than i do

88: If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?yes, i hate bugs, give me the money

89: What is something you wish you had more of?time, energy, patience, money

90: Have you ever trusted someone too much?no, i’m not someone who trusts easily

91: Do you sleep with your window open?only in the summer

92: Do you get along with girls?yes, anyone that doesn’t get on with someone because of their gender is an asshole

93: Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?nope

94: Does sex mean love?hell no, it can be an expression of it but no

95: You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?yeah she wold be freaking the fuck out because she’s locked in a room!

96: Have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?no, actually, i haven’t

97: Did you sleep alone this week?yes

98: Everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?yes ? 

99: Do you believe in love at first sight?no, not at all

100: Who was the last person that you pinky promise?one of my besties, holly