#so like if u want ur gals to peg him like GO FOR IT !

[abulous]

“It’s just that he has such a big dick, you know?” Sam sighs, eyes closing as he lets his phone drop to lightly tap his forehead. “It’s like, I don’t even like the dude. He’s a horrible person with even more horrible opinions, like a real grade A asshole, right?” He shifts his head to glance at the other on the armchair before holding his phone back up above himself to go through it until he pulls up the man’s dating profile. He wasn’t going to message him, he wasn’t. “You know what I need to do?”

The blonde purses his lips, tongue darting out a second later as he eyes his phone in concentration. He’s exiting out of the jerk’s information and searching through the app once again. “I just need to fuck someone with an even bigger dick. That’s the only way I’m going to get over him, I can’t go back to him. I just can’t.” Sam flips himself over on the couch, giving him a better view of his roommate to gauge their reaction. “This is the perfect plan, yeah?”

[arrowsjusticeleague]

Ranking the Arrowverse Main Villains based on my stupidity (not all of them tho cause I cba)

22. Ben Lockwood | Agent Liberty - cute but racist. -infinity/10

21. Lex Luthor - ugly as fuck. No redeeming qualities. -1000000000000/10

19. Non - a little bitch. Astra totally pegged him. Without her he's just fucking useless. -200/10

18. Zoom - a sleaze. Just gross. Can't deal. -127/10

17. Vandal Savage - just kinda boring -70/10

16. Emiko Queen - beautiful, but a poor Backstory. Like, get some real justification for ur crimes. Or don't, just be a badass murderous gal with absolutely no reason. Did neither of these, didn't really work. 0/10

15. Ricardo Diaz - the DUFF of the Arrow villains. 0/10, only ranked higher than emiko cause he has some sick tats

14. Anti Monitor - wrinkly, old, rotten, shrinking for eternity, scumbag 0.001/10 killed my fave

13. Mom-el i can never remember her fucking name 0.002/10

12. Malcolm Merlyn | The Dark Archer - cool, but in like a granddad kinda way. One of those gay guys who's so repressed they become homophobic, but like, about murder instead. 0.272781/10

11. Savitar - stupid. Like really fucking stupid. Only became a villain cause his past self failed to save his fiance from being killed by himself. Wtf are u doing, dude? Get a hold of ur life. 4/10

10. Nemon the Demon - 5/10 hot but wouldn't fuck.

9. Racy ghoul - powerful, kinda doesn't have a motive, manages to ruin arrow s3 part 2 by killing ollie in 3x09, successful career . 5.99999/10

8. Devoe wtf is his name again - smart, not a speedster and faces barry , nothing without his wife. 6/10

7. Mollusc?? - managed to hold his own against Our Lord And Saviour Beebo for a little while. Successful villain. 9.5/10

6. Reign - could step on me whenever she wanted. 10/10

5. Red Alice/Beth Kane - id be gay for her. A murderous bitch, but cool. 99/10

4. Damien Darhk - an asshole, but manages to look good doing it. Killed my fave, so minus points for that, but a total daddy even so. Actually kinda redeemable, so uh idk... 99.00001/10

3.5. Black Siren weeeeoooweeeoooo - not always a villain so only 3.5 but she's gorgeous and amazing and honestly u go honey go achieve ur dreams. Amazing, 100/10.

3. Slade Wilson | Deathstroke -I just think he's neat. 2500/10

2. Eobard Thawne/"Harrison Wells" | The Reverse Flash - has good motives, complicated Backstory. Air of mystery, we don't know a lot about him but we do know he's having the time of his life. 9999/10

1. Adrian Chase | Prometheus - extra™, a whole ass mood, iconic, drama queen. Wins at life and death. 100000/10

(Also plz read tags lmao this aint a serious post)