#spoilers for 1x12 I guess

[mosylufanfic]

Salvage Operation

Joplin Sibtain is 53, so I figured making Brasso about ten-ish years older than Cassian fit. 

Salvage Operation

When he got home and the house was dark, he knew what he'd hear even before he called out, "Bee? Where’s Bix?”

“L-l-left," the little droid said from his charging station. "S-s-sorry.”

“Not your fault, Bee. I’ll go get her.” He ran a hand over the top of the old droid's casing. "Any idea where?"

"Sh-she just s-said out."

"Right." He'd barely started calculating where she might have gone when the house comm buzzed. With a mix of relief and dread, he answered. 

"Brasso, right? This is Cal at the Doktam's head. Come get your girl."

"Right," he said. "On my way. I'm sor - "

The click sounded in his ears. He put the comm away with a sigh. He didn't think he'd ever get used to living somewhere that everyone he spoke to hadn’t known him for decades. 

He had some tenuous goodwill built up, from his job. It wasn't hard for a man built like a brick shithouse to find work. It wasn’t salvaging; they didn’t do that here. He missed it sometimes, the careful and patient work in the wreckage of old ships, finding what was still good. But that was back on Ferrix and he wasn’t there anymore,

His new job was at the docks, loading and unloading, but he'd always learned fast and he was willing to work hard. So the other dock workers said, "Brasso's a good sort. Quiet. That girl of his, though . . . "

Bix was not doing well.

Sometimes he thought he'd like to go back to when she would lie, catatonic, in the bed under the window, staring out at the sea birds wheeling over the shore. Even the nightmares, he knew how to handle - just hold her and let her feel the warmth of another body against hers, the pressure of his arms grounding her until she remembered that she wasn't in that hotel room in Ferrix, with . . . whatever it was they'd done to her. 

She'd never talked about it. 

The screaming wouldn't always stop right away, but it worked eventually.

This new phase, though . . . 

Often it was drink. Sometimes it was spice. Sometimes she would just disappear and he'd scan the shore for her body, his heart in his mouth, for a day or two before she turned up, refusing to tell him where she'd gone to. 

"You're a good lad, Brasso," Jezzi had told him before she left.

"Lad?" he'd said. "I'm pushing forty."

"And I've seen it come and go," she shot back. "What's your point?" She'd turned serious again. "Those bastard Imperials broke something in our Bix. And it's not your job to put it back together again. You can't do it, and that's a fact. Only Bixy can. And only she knows if it's possible."

"I'm not trying to do it for her," he said. "I'm just trying to be here."

"She's not your father," Jezzi had said. "And she's not Cassian Andor. Being here isn’t going to fix her. You need to know that."

"I do know that," he'd said very, very evenly. 

"Do you?"

He did his best. He scanned junk stores for the kind of things Bix had repaired back on Ferrix and left them on the table. He scraped together money to take her to the kind of doctors Gangi Moon offered. He scraped harder for the medications they prescribed and tried to make her take them. 

She sometimes fixed the things. Sometimes she destroyed them. Sometimes both. 

She went to the doctors and refused to talk. She only wanted the sleeping tabs, and she wanted those more often than he was comfortable with. 

The Doktam's Head was about the only place that hadn't barred Bix already, and he had a feeling that was about to change. It was a shitty little box of a place with shitty alcohol, but even they had their limits.

She was slouched in a booth toward the back, head lolling back into the corner made by the booth and the wall. There was a smudge of blood under her nose and a puffy red mark on her cheekbone. On the table was a mug lying on its side, and the puddle next to it smelled of spotchka, the cheapest thing you could get around here. 

At least she was inside. It would have been heartening if there hadn't been people scattered around the bar, nursing bruises and glaring at him. 

"Bix," he said. "Hey." 

She didn't respond.

"Bixy?" He rapped the table.

Nothing. 

Cautiously, he shook her shoulder. Touching her without prior warning was how Wilmon had gotten his nose broken. Poor kid. He hadn't held it against her, mostly.

But she still didn't move. 

"Did she take something?" he demanded of the bartender, presumably Cal, who'd wandered over to look on. 

He shrugged. "How should I know?"

Brasso sighed through his nose and tugged one side of her shirt open. Shifting to block the bartender's view of her chest, he rubbed his knuckles hard along her sternum. 

She coughed, and her face crumpled. She swatted at his hand. "Stoppit."

"Bix," he said, pulling her shirt closed again. "You've got to get up."

Her eyes peeled open and she glared at him. That was a good sign. It was more worrisome when her eyes were empty, as if all her Bix-ness had just rolled itself into a ball somewhere deep inside. "Don't want to."

"I know. But you've got to." He checked her eyes, confirmed the pupils were the same size, and got an arm around her back. He half-helped, half-hauled her out of the booth.

"She can't come back," Cal said. 

"Okay," he said, trying to get her on her feet.

"Hear me? And you owe - "

"Tell your boss to talk to me tomorrow." The last time he'd paid Cal off, none of it had made it to the owner of the bar. 

"No, now."

Brasso straightened himself up to his full height, still holding Bix against his side, and glared down at Cal. 

"Tomorrow's fine," Cal muttered.

“Wan’nother drink,” Bix said.

“No,” Brasso said, and took her out.

It was tempting to heave her up on his back, but the walk to their rented house in the cold air might work some of the drink out of her system. It was slow going, but by the time they reached their street, both her eyes were open at the same time and she was moving under her own power. Even if she was swearing at him as she did.

“I just wanted a damn drink. That’s all. Didn’t need you playing savior.”

“You got in a fight.”

“Some ass wouldn’t leave me alone. And he had friends.”

He stopped walking. “He touch you?”

“Only once,” she said with a certain grim satisfaction.

He let out his breath and started moving again. “Was it the bartender?”

“Nah. Some shithead.”

"You're out of there, you know," he said. “Banned.”

"I heard him."

They made their slow way almost to their door. He stopped because if they had this talk inside, it would distress Bee.

"Bixy," he said. "You can't keep doing this. Drinking and drugging and fighting. I know you're in a bad place, but you're not making it any better. What would Cassian think, huh?"

"Cassian's not coming," she spat.

It shocked him into silence. He'd known that. Almost since the moment his old friend stepped off the ship before they left Ferrix, he'd known that.

He just hadn't known Bix did.

"Bixy," he said gently.

"Don't call me that. It makes me feel like a damn child."

"Well, then, stop acting like a child!" He pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry. That was - I shouldn't've shouted."

"Don't apologize," she said. "It's what you think. Poor little broken Bixy. Aren't you the big strong man, hanging around to pick up the pieces."

"It's not like that."

"Isn't it? Then leave. Go on," she snarled. "Leave. Everyone else did."

"Cassian . . . was going through a lot."

"Aren't we all," she said bitterly.

He persisted. "Wilmon joined the Rebels. And Jezzi wanted to go back home. It had nothing to do with you. Is that what you want? You want to go back home?"

She went pale.

Another sin to be added to the Imperial Bastards' tabs. They'd taken Ferrix away from Bix, who could count six or seven generations on the wall and now couldn't even think of the planet without folding in on herself. 

He wasn't so sure he could go back himself, even if he wasn't probably wanted for his part in the riot at Maarva’s funeral. The Empire had cracked down after that. There were stories of hangings on Rix Road, interrogations, imprisonments. And they hadn't let anyone who'd died in the riot get a proper funeral.

Someone said the Empire had demolished the wall. But that couldn't be right. 

He shook himself. This was no time for a spat. Bix was drunk and miserable. In the morning, she'd be . . . probably still miserable, but probably not drunk.

"Come inside, Bixy."

She shook her head. "And don't call me that."

"You need to sleep it off."

"I can sleep it off out here."

"You'll freeze to death out here."

"Fine by me."

"You don't mean that, Bixy."

"Don't tell me what I mean," she snarled. "And stop calling me Bixy."

"Everyone called you that for fifteen years," he said. "It's a habit." For some reason, he added, "Bixy."

"Call me that again. See what happens. Go on."

He leaned forward until their noses brushed. "Bixy," he said.

She grabbed the front of his shirt and slammed her lips on his.

She tasted of shitty alcohol and blood and she kissed him hard enough to grind his lips against his teeth until he tasted his own blood, too. But he forced himself to stay still, hands dangling at his sides, until she dropped back on her heels and glared up at him. 

"Is this it, then?" he said softly. "The next cudgel you're going to use to beat yourself until you feel something?"

“Go fuck yourself,” she snarled, and slammed the door open so hard it stuck. 

Bee said, "B-bix? B-brasso w-went to look f-for you."

"He found me. I'm going to bed."

Brasso stepped inside. "I'm here, Bee, it's fine."

"Sh-she's an-gry."

“At him!” she yelled from behind the curtain around her bed. “Not you.” The bed creaked as if she’d thrown herself on it.

Bee didn’t say anything else, but swiveled his head until his single eye peered at Brasso.

“It’ll be all right,” he said quietly. “She’ll pull through.”

He examined the door, found it had bounced off the track, and pushed it until it clicked back and creaked closed. Then he leaned back against it with a heavy sigh, wishing with all his heart that he hadn't wanted to kiss her back. 

FINIS

[shinelikethunder]

SPN Brain Rot Tasting Menu

this is not a viewing guide. (the only SPN viewing guide i'll sign off on is "bomb your way through the first 3 to 5 seasons in order, then decide whether you want to watch the direct-to-VHS sequel eras.") this is a "someone near you caught SPN brain rot and you're trying to decide whether to join them in hell" tasting menu, based on what piqued my personal interest when i was still on the fence about continuing with the show.

criteria: basically, "ideal episodes to catch by wandering through the room with no context while a roommate is watching SPN." so, skewed towards self-contained, less-spoilery, solid episodes that don't make me want to fistfight them in the denny's parking lot, but did made something in my subconscious sit up like it had been slapped.

okay, shine, what the fuck is this show's deal: 2x16 Roadkill. god's perfect little self-contained one-off ep. nothing spectacular, just a solidly-executed ghost story set on a lonely mountain highway. fairly representative of how SPN monster-of-the-week episodes roll, requires zero prior investment in the characters to be good, and i'm fond of it because this is basically the point where i buckled in and committed to watching the rest of the show. but also, quietly, almost covertly, a thesis statement for some of the core underpinnings of the whole thing.

shut up and give me the sickos-haha-yes.jpg: 1x06 Skin. what if you thought you were in an X-File but ended up getting erotically tortured by a shapeshifter in the guise of your codependent brother? what if you fuckers were so repressed that this was the only way the show could bring itself to air the dirty laundry of your sibling dynamics. what if the monster was all the parts of yourself you could never quite bury deep enough. what then, huh.

tell me more about the childhood trauma AND/OR c'mon gimme more sick shit: 1x18 Something Wicked. still obsessed with how fractally disturbing this episode is. there's a monster that preys on children at night in their beds and the only way to stop it is to catch it in the act. if SPN were a show with anything to say about morality it could eat itself alive chewing on the question of using children as predator bait, but it's not. it's a show about The Horrors + the shit that couldn't be buried deep enough + family as the first and most inescapable hell + the ways it intertwines damage with salvation. also there's lots of Winchester family flashback content in this one if you want to get invested in these assholes and their daddy issues.

under the cut: duos and trios of episodes on specific themes, including some spoilery ones

fine, get me invested in these assholes and their daddy issues (low-spoiler Lite Edition) AND/OR gimme those Americana aesthetics: 1x11 Scarecrow + 1x12 Faith + 1x16 Shadow. 1x11: SPN does "small town that sacrifices people to the harvest gods" and the brothers have their first big fight (guess who precipitates it). 1x12: SPN does "faith healer with some shit going on" and we get our first go-round with both Sam's belief in a higher power and Dean cheating Totally Certain Death No For Serious You Guys. 1x16: SPN starts in on the relentless pilfering of world mythology and the construction of its own demon lore, and we finally get to meet dad in person, which will exacerbate the mental illness of zero overly-enmeshed twenty-somethings.

(early SPN demon lore fucks incredibly hard, btw, and goes some creepy-ass Twin Peaks places towards the end of the season, which the show later doubles down on just when demonic possession is at risk of devolving into a plot device. this doesn't prevent it from devolving into a plot device, but it does retroactively justify some wild gothic-horror readings of s1.)

the I DON'T CARE ABOUT SPOILERS AND I'M FINE GOING IN WITHOUT CONTEXT menu

get me invested in these assholes and their daddy issues (spoiler-tastic speedrun): 2x08 Crossroad Blues (+ 2x11 Playthings) + 2x14 Born Under a Bad Sign. 2x08: a banger of an episode based on some classic "earthly success by selling your soul at a crossroads" folklore; gains twelve extra layers of crazymaking if you end up finishing the season. 2x11 (optional): a "haunted gothic mansion" monster of the week with some fun stuff between Extremely Normal Siblings. 2x14: more quality sickos-yes content a la 1x06 Skin, with a "woke up covered in someone else's blood with no memory of the past week" setup that goes even further off the rails from there.

i want to study Dean Winchester like a bug: 2x18 Hollywood Babylon + 2x19 Folsom Prison Blues + 3x10 Dream a Little Dream of Me. no comment. no fucking comment. don't look at me. we're not going to talk about it.

ok but tell me about the angel content: 2x13 Houses of the Holy + 4x01 Lazarus Rising. you HAVE to get down in the crunchy details of how SPN has been treating the entire concept of god and angels to get the full effect of 4x01, which is one of the show's banger episodes of all time. 2x13 is great, self-contained, and surprisingly low on spoilers, but 4x01 of course contains massive ones for season 3, my stealth favorite of all SPN seasons.

people keep talking about SPN's goofy and/or meta episodes, what's that about?: 3x11 Mystery Spot + 4x18 The Monster at the End of This Book. both casually spoilery. 3x11 is the beloved "yesterday was Tuesday, but today is Tuesday too" time loop episode where Sam watches Dean die approximately 8908234 times (and then shit gets dark). the arc-plotty parts of 4x18 require head-spinning amounts of context, but this is the one where the show exists in-universe as a series of trashy pulp novels by a guy named Chuck, and it flies impressively close to the sun of some kind of meta-storytelling singularity.

i am a masochist who loves fun side characters whom the show will end up mistreating horribly: 3x12 Jus in Bello. contains all three of my problematic(ally treated) faves: Bela Talbot, a shameless con artist and dealer in supernatural artifacts who's just enough of a Dean parallel to drive him batshit cuckoo-bananas insane with hatred for her; Victor Henriksen, the cocky ambitious FBI agent assigned to investigate the Winchesters' multi-state crime spree; and Ruby, a demon who shows up claiming to be a defector from hell and tries to befriend Sam. this is SUCH a well-constructed base-under-siege ep with SO many moving parts, forcing Henriksen and the Winchesters and eventually Ruby into a great reluctant team-up. it's also my big exception to "no recommending episodes that blow my socks off AND make me want to hunt the writers for sport." mostly because its Big Bullshit is an unnecessary sucker-punch inserted after the main plot wraps up, so i can just cross it out with my mental red pen and go "it's fine, they're lying, all my faves are alive and well and in witness protection." if you've made it this far, you need a warning shot anyway about what this show is going to do to you.

notable omissions that also rot my brain like a compost heap: the last 3 eps of s1 for being best viewed with a whole season's worth of intricate rituals as context; fully half of s4 for being incomprehensible without a ten-minute spoiler reel; 2x17, 3x06, and all the Gordon eps, among others, for being simultaneously incredible and enraging. (notable omissions that are important and have their moments but put me off watching the show for over a decade: the pilot and its 2-for-1 special on women in refrigerators.) do NOT @ me for leaving out other Core Brainrot Episodes. i laid out my criteria already.

[candy-pants]

hi it's your secret santa again! i also hate that episode of hannah montana forever :( formative experience was being betrayed like that at a young age #notmyjakeryan. also i remember finding out they recycled that song for glc and being confused. like... they couldn't just write a second acoustic christmas song? lol. also i think naming my fave disney channel stuff will give me away but i've always really enjoyed 2d animated christmas movies in general.

what are your favorite disney channel episodes aside from holiday episodes?

#notmyjakeryan !!!!! and yeah i didn't want that song tainted by goddamn spencer ugh

also i was just talking about black mirror's white christmas over at gcwca and i should have mentioned that on yesterday's ask lol and polar express! now the animation is kinda creepy but it brings me joy. oh and the justice league christmas episode is really nice too, i watched that a few months ago

OKAY favorite non-holiday disney channel episodes:

swac: 2x10 falling for the falls pt 1 changed my life!! also 1x09, 1x12, 1x17, 2x09, 2x15, 2x16, 2x22 and 2x25 (this is considering sonny with a secret is one episode)

phineas and ferb: literally anything from seasons 1 and 2 is amazing but i'll say one good scare ought to do it is my favorite

jonas: 1x19 cold shoulder is so so funny AND kevin sings left my heart in scandinavia which i love. also 1x18 double date my beloved

wowp: i've been rewatching the show and 1x09 and 1x15 are so good, but in general i'm really fond of the first season

liv and maddie: i LOVE the season 3 finale like. truly. i also love flugelball-a-rooney. actually this choice of episodes is so biased because both feature my favorite dove acting performances shdhssdh but yeah there's a bunch of great episodes in 2 and 3

zeke and luther: ONE STRANGE NIGHT. also summer school, soul bucket, not my sister's keeper, airheads, old nasty, double crush, the bro list, unusual suspects and sibling rivalries

ik this is mostly disney us but i can't not mention violetta 1x77 that shit is gold

i will refrain from asking yours now that we've established it would be a spoiler lmao unless it's an episode from something very unexpected that i would never guess 👀

[thissugarcane]

qaf rewatch notes to self, s1

episode... wait where am I again? oh yeah, 1x12, "move it or lose it". wait what is this one about? oh wait-- no, this isn't kip yet. this is brian and mikey.

brian running in a clean loft with mikey's pictures still up; an interesting thought: brian uses exercise to escape feelings of anxiety/depression?

michael's determination he's going to be "too happy with david" really feels a loooooot like justin's protestation he's so happy with ethan, eh oh el

cynthia asking brian about what's going on with michael: she really is a good friend in the small way she can be.

also, brian calling ted and ted being like "what the fuck are you doing calling me?" -- as much as brian is desired by all he really only has like. two friends. poor bastard.

oh jeez, I forgot this is emmett's gay crisis :(

mel calling gus "your son and brian's. I just pay the bills". and mel trying to get lindsay to open up and talk, clearly they're not actually all that well-suited, communication wise. lindsay avoids confrontation like the plague unless she can control it, and mel welcomes it. like, they never actually learned to adapt how to talk to each other

awww. ted trying to be a good friend by asking brian about whether he's talked to michael! and brian being actually genuine (though annoyed) when he says "I told you, he's out of my life and i'm out of his. so would you please shut the fuck up about it?"

it's interesting to see how while Brian almost always deflects emotional conversations with the gang with sarcasm... in the moments when they ask him with genuine concern how he is / what's going on / etc., he does (sometimes) respond with genuineness and openness back. He isn't angry at Ted here and it does feel like Ted understands the "please" is genuine.

also randomly, was Brian drinking something with six marachino cherries stuck in a pineapple?! did he actually order a fruit cocktail? he's playing with.... it's a lemon with marachino cherries, not pineapple. What the actual hell

*guiltily skips Michael and David* I definitely remember thinking when I watched this in 1999, that hal sparks tried his best but was really bad at faking gay chemistry. I mean, sure, the actor that played Dr. Dave probably didn't help butthe two of them are just like. nah

randomly: brian's taken down an alley by a rando right here, a more risky late-night hookup than he'd usually take (also more of a troll than he'd usually fuck). guess there's an alley to cruise by woody's? also: this would be an interesting moment for Something To Happen To Brian if you were doing an AU. (also, is that the same alley / corner where justin blew him in 3x10?)

brian drops by the lesbians' and when he asks "besides, when you think about it what do Mikey and I really have in common?" mel immediately pipes up with, "you're lives?" -- implicitly "you dumbass?" Also, both of them sort of feel sorry for Brian when he says "some things are better left broken". HowEVER, they also look like "can you fucking believe this" about him wanting to play scrabble.

(mel also clearly is looking at lindsay when he says "some things are better left broken", as in "are we at the point where we should give up?" spoilers, mel: yes.)

"how many guys hit on you a night?" "give or take, a hundred and twelve-- I don't know!" as much as brian likes his own company he also doesn't really seem to know how to be alone, here.'

(*skips the anti-gay emmett scene* I can't do it, it's too painful)

aww, sunshine!! first appearance of Justin this whole episode and he's bussing tables like a boss.

this tiny scene with Daphne and Justin is astoundingly good. She's sitting at the liberty diner, hanging out with him while he's on shift because he isn't good at making time for her but she is; she calls him conceited but not in a mean way (true facts, daph, true facts). He's all, "I could fuck practically anyone I wanted," and then when she asks, "So why don't you?", pointing out that he might claim to be All That, he's not taking advantage of it..... and boom, Brian walks in, and all she says is, "nevermind, the answer just walked in the door."

It's pretty clear here that Daphne is getting a little tired of Justin's preening-- and I might infer, also a bit tired of Justin's obsession with Brian? I mean, who could blame her, she's probably the one that's had to listen to it for hours and hours on end. *g* However, she still gives Brian a happy smile because she luvs him too.

So let's talk about how Justin says "what, you actually want to know?" when Brian asks how things are... and then his tentative, casual, "everything's fine". Because Justin doesn't believe brian means it and is just. waiting for him to be mean again. and obviously mid-season 1 Justin isn't really put off by Brian's meanness, he doesn't want to encourage it or give him an opening

And then! Justin's confused face at when Brian says "what are you doing tonight", his little excited, optimistic "really?" and Daphne's tiny little smile!

Then! Then justin realizes the truth, it's about Michael. also Daphne! Daphne is the one that says "you should get them to make up because you love Brian". And Brian's "stay the fuck out of it" at Justin's attempted interference is harsher / angrier than he was at Ted (peut etre because he's more concerned about justin getting involved? peut etre because he knows justin is way less likely to listen to him?)

ice cream kisses! justin is so good to him, cheering him up.

oh my god. "[so you pushed him away, and now he hates you]" "doesn't matter, so long as mikey's happy." and then a season later brian does exactly the same thing to justin. I wonder if Justin ever put the pieces together? brian pushed him toward ethan -- a man he thought would be better for him than he was, even if brian knew the relationship wouldn't last. which is exactly what he did with Michael and David.

okay, in my head I'm going to say yes, yes he did eventually put the pieces together-- note to self for the S4 rewrite, have michael point maybe once he learns about the cancer: that brian pushed justin away to prove his love in a way he's only ever done for michael. because he loves justin that much.

People quote that "I'm onto you" and how Justin stopped being able to read brian in S2 because of trauma. [these are random babble thoughts] and I think that's true, but I think equally true is the fact that the bashing removed justin's ability to believe, without evidence, of brian's love/care. he couldn't believe in it, and brian did nothing to reinforce it. so i'm not sure I'd say he "stopped being onto him", so much as that stopped being important. he saw through brian but it wasn't enough, because he'd changed too fundamentally.

*skips emmett* *skips michael and david*

Mel calling Ted to get brian tf out of their house, hahaha. I mean it's sad, and angsty that Lindsay and brian are talking -- randomly, how great is it that brian doesn't knee-jerk take lindsay's side, he points out that it might actually be lindsay's fault, forcing her to be objective and deal with it.

but mostly, lolol Mel being like "just get him the fuck out of our house!" Because in the ideal AU/canon, Mel might not hate Brian... but no matter what she definitely doesn't like him enough to want him around more than occasionally.

Brian: suggests relationship therapy. mel wants to go to relationship therapy! Lindsay wants to avoid everything. Even if Brian were bi/straight, him and lindsay would be a terrible couple

Randomly: I really love Tracey, I wish she was in more of the show. She's a good person and a much better friend to Michael than most of them.

you know, lindsay's "you expect all of my time and devotion"... there's a lot wrapped up in this, a lot about how her and michael are more poly / less devoted than Brian (and Justin), who's heart is settled on only one person.

Justin doing the right thing-- omfg. "he loves you. he'll never admit it but he does." Justin tells Michael this in 1x12 and a season later Michael repeats this VERY SAME LINE to Justin. "he doesn't believe in love." "you're the exception." and then justin tells him what brian did, to try and get him and david back together. Justin does what DEBBIE SHOULD HAVE. jesus, why is the seventeen year old the most emotionally mature?? (I mean, yeah, it's because he had two relatively loving parents who nurtured and protected him. But.)

"your ward tracked me down. insisted that I take it." "yeah well I'll have to punish him severely". note to self: if you ever do a S1 bdsm AU, maybe use this as the first forays into it?

(god, no wait, self, you are not writing a S1 D/s au.)

and now there's david trying, with michael. I wonder, if the actor for Dr Dave wouldn't have been a shit, would Dave become what Ben did become? meh, whatever, Ben works better because he's less controlling.

[thefirsthogokage]

So Help Me Todd 1x12: 'Psilo-Sibling'

Where to Watch: Paramount+

Spoilers: I am starting to notice that the titles are spoilers enough. Like, they literally give away huge chunks of the plot. So, yeah, I'll probably just spoil bunch of stuff, but not everything.

Genre: Helping The Little Guy While Maybe Also Being Shady, Legal, Procedural.

Similar Shows: Leverage (FreeVee), Sprung (FreeVee)

Reactions/Commentary Below The Cut

Oh this is an odd start. I would have thought it was glitching for a second.

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I liked my Crocs...

"Mother" Geezus.

Oh hey, Black Governor. Nice.

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Oh my god, Lawrence is an idiot. "B-O-M-B-Ss". Geezus.

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Aww, Todd went to save them.

Nice physical comedy, but god does Margaret not give a shit about anyone.

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Anyone else notice how the title gives away so much of the plot? It might give away the entire plot this time.

Oh, no, I think it's this couple. They are trying to get rid of the sister to expand their business. ~ My guess about 13 min in.

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God I hate Allison. She doesn't deserve Todd as a brother.

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God Lawrence sucks too. I will give props to the actor though to be willing to act like a five year old. I can't imagine that's always easy for a grown ass man to pull off.

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Is he high? Yeah. HA.

Not a bad scene. Though Lawrence's little confession doesn't make sense.

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Oh did they expect Todd and Margaret to get high too?

Nice job Todd!

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This show needs more Inga. God is she gorgeous. And really sweet in real life. Also, Susan is the only one ever really on Todd's side.

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Oh this is very cringe. This scene. With the catering. Ew.

The Governor is in on it. She has to be. Will she get money from the farm?

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Oh that's definitely the couple. Shorter one is a the woman.

Yeah, Todd, she's less of a threat to them physically.

Oh don't do that Margaret, they'll have to kill you now for sure.

I love the hat Margaret is wearing in these circumstances. Like, that's different. Usually a straight up beanie.

Nice job Todd! You talked her down!

Nice job Lawrence!

Aww, she gave Todd a complement.

----

Oh, a court scene.

I doubt they would dismiss it that easily.

Wait did the other guy help in the combaty thing earlier? I didn't see that clearly.

----

Well I guess the Governor wasn't in on it.

----

Totally rooting for Susan and Todd.

----

Is this actually going to make progress with the family, or not? They tend to go up and down.

----

I wouldn't cally that burying it in soil.

I guess it was.

Shouldn't it be too cold to sit outside like that?

[zoeyxjoan]

[mangeur-detoiles]

Here’s a recap of the Kacy bts content we got for the upcoming episodes. Possible spoilers!

For @hatchetation and fans who aren't in Tweeter/Instagram fandom.

- From Vanessa Lachey ig stories (on or about oct 8),Vanessa, Noah, Tori and Yasmine. My guess is 1x10 bts.

From Vanessa Lachey ig live (on or about oct 18), Vanessa and Tori video

- From Tori ig story, the famous « balcony video » with Yasmine. Here the video.

- Other Tori and Yasmine pics, same outfits. I don’t know the official source. It was posted by this twitter account

These bts pics and videos might come from 1x11 and 1x12 or 1x13.

Here are other interested bts from 1x09 with Tori's rainbow mask

[kudzushadow]

There for You | Part 1 of 3 | A Harlivy Fanfiction

Summary: After Harley finds Ivy in tears on the floor of the bathroom, realization dawns on her about how hard the past year had been on Ivy, from literally dying (1x12) to mind control. (2x12) They have a heartfelt conversation about the events leading up to the moment, and learn that sometimes it's ok to confide in the ones you care for. (Based on the scene from Eat Bang! Kill Tour: Issue #1)

Hurt/Comfort | TW: Past trauma mentions, slight hints of past abuse. | Spoilers for Harley Quinn: The Animated Series & Eat Bang! Kill Tour: Issue #1

See bottom for extra notes!

-

"...Ive?" Harley's eyes widened as she rounded a corner and was greeted with a sight that made her heart ache.

Ivy sat on the bathroom floor, head buried in her hands as her whole body shook with sobs. 

Harley was immediately kneeling by her side, arms wrapping protectively around her girlfriend without a second of hesitation. "Shh. It's alright, Ive. Everything's going to be ok…" Ivy had been acting strange since the wedding, but she hadn't been willing to open up to Harley. Now Harley was beyond worried, it was clearly more serious than the redhead had been letting on.

Ivy immediately relaxed into the blonde, tucking her face into Harley's chest. Eventually her sobs quieted down, but Harley could feel her trembling as she held her. While she tried to figure out what to say, she rubbed Ivy’s back comfortingly. 

After a couple moments of silence, after holding Ivy, feeling her tremble, listening to her uneven breathing… seeing her tear stained cheeks… realization began to dawn on Harley. God, she was so stupid and oblivious! She’d been so focused on her own feelings, she hadn’t even begun to consider Ivy’s… and how hard it must’ve been, being stuck in the middle of everything. 

“Ivy… I'm sorry. I’m so sorry… I’ve been so caught up in my own feelings, I hadn’t given any thought to how heavy all of this must weigh on you…” She brushed a strand of hair from Ivy’s face before continuing. “You’ve been through so much this past year, and I’ve been a pretty shitty friend. I should’ve been there for you, I should’ve helped you, should’ve protected you… and if I could go back in time and do it all differently, I would. A thousand times over.”

“...but I can’t, and that’s something I’ll regret as long as I live. Yet you’ve always been there for me, even when I created huge messes… when I joined the Legion of Doom, when I went back to Joker, when I released an army of parademons, when the Injustice League froze me… god, that last one sucked. Yet you rescued me. You always rescue me, Ive. Always help me. Always take care of me, even though I’m not sure I deserve it most of the time…” Harley looked away, shutting her eyes for a moment before forcing herself to continue. “...Ivy, you don’t have to pretend to be strong in front of me. You’re hurting… and that’s ok. We all hurt sometimes, but that doesn’t make us weak… or… or less human. I’m here now though. I want to share that burden with you, if you’ll let me.” Harley looked back at Ivy, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. “I love you, Ive. I love you so much… and if you ever… yknow, want to talk about… well, anything at all, really… I just want you to know I’m here.” 

Ivy turned her head away, and the next few minutes passed slowly in silence. Harley held Ivy, didn’t once let go, but with each passing second she became increasingly worried she’d done something wrong. Was it something she’d said? Oh god, had she made it worse? 

“Ive, I didn’t mean-”

“Harley.” Ivy pulled away slightly, raising her head so she could meet Harley’s wide blue eyes. “I-” She paused, choking back a sob. “I hurt you, I hurt Chuck… I hurt so many people… all because I didn’t know what I wanted then… and to be honest, I’m not sure what I want now, either…”

Harley’s heart dropped, and she opened her mouth to respond before Ivy cut her off.

“-...but Harley… so much has happened. You’ve made mistakes, I’ve made mistakes… and you’re trying to change… that’s good, and I’m proud of you… but you're right, we can’t change the past, no matter how hard we try.” Ivy shut her eyes, letting out a shaky exhale before continuing. “Opening up… relationships… hell, just being around other people is… is hard for me… but you showed me the good in humanity. That not all humans are… are monsters. My life before I met you… was… lonely. Even with all my plants, I had nobody to talk to. Nobody to confide in… but I liked it that way. It was safe. Nobody was going to judge me, or… or abandon me... and I guess that’s why I… why I chose Chuck… because he was the safer option.”

I trust you, with my life… but I don’t trust you with my heart.

Harley winced inwardly, but she understood where Ivy was coming from. Harley definitely didn’t have the best track record with… well, anything really. 

So I… I’m marrying Kiteman.

“I was… I was scared. Scared that if I… if I went with what my heart was telling me, it was just going to get broken… and after everything, I just… I couldn’t stand the idea of that happening. Of losing you again…” Ivy trailed off, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes.

You were my one friend, and I asked you for one favor, but instead you ditched me for the Joker, who treats you like shit! 

“Ivy… I had no idea you felt that way.” Harley spoke softly, using her free hand to lift Ivy’s chin so she could look into those beautiful green eyes… eyes whose depths she often found herself lost in. “I… didn’t know what I really wanted then. It was like… like I was trying to fill a hole inside me… like part of me was missing… and then, that night at the pit…” She smiled, using her thumb to brush a tear from Ivy’s cheek. “That was one of the most amazing nights of my life. I hadn’t realized… I hadn’t realized what it felt like to have someone else care about you. To have someone love you. Joker definitely never cared about me… not in the way you do… and... y'know, maybe I didn’t deserve it. Like I said, I haven’t always been the most reliable… but that changes today… if you’ll give me a shot, that is…”

Ivy looked up at Harley as she brushed the tear away, and smiled sadly. “...You’re trying to change… and that’s what matters. Harls, I do love you. A lot…. More than I care to admit… and… this whole relationship thing is new to me, but… I’m… I’m willing to give it a shot. To give you a shot… and today… today was proof of how much you’ve changed. How much you’re willing to sacrifice for others…” Ivy rested her head on Harley’s shoulder, but her mind was clearly wandering.

“...but that’s not all that’s troubling you, is it?”

“...perceptive as always.” Ivy chuckled halfheartedly, then looked away again. “It’s… it’s fine. It’s nothing important…”

“Well, I am a psychiatrist… but seriously Ive, you can tell me anything.” Harley stroked her cheek. “You know that.” 

“Harley, I really don’t want to talk about it… can we just… can you help me out of this dress?”

“...yeah. Sure thing.” Harley stood up before reaching out a hand to help Ivy up. She definitely wasn’t going to let this drop that easily, but Ivy clearly didn’t want to talk anymore right now… so instead Harley busied herself with the zipper of Ivy’s wedding dress and the sights underneath.

- End of part 1 -

I think all of it copied and pasted? If it looks like anything is missing please lmk!

This... this is what quarantine, lack of sleep, and having covid does to you. Helps you get over writers block. This is my first work I've gone public with, and originally I wasn't going to post it but a friend gave me the confidence to share it! So... here it is, I guess?

I was going to post it on Archives of Our Own too, but I have to wait till the 14th to get an account. 😐

Comments mean the world, even if it's just a couple words. I'll even take criticism to heart! By commenting you all can let me know what you think, and if you want to see the other parts...

Any interaction is appreciated, and my inbox and dms are always open! Thank you, and have a great day! (Or night!)

[lambourngb]

re: your tags on that one post abt plotholes in rnm: what are the plotholes that make you lose the most sleep?

(this is my main btw, my rnm blog is @curlyguerin )

Hi! Okay... strap in, because there are a lot of little and big things that wiggle into my thoughts and makes me wonder ...am I the only one who couldn't follow that plotline?

In my opinion RNM suffers more from abandoned narratives and continuity errors than plot holes I guess, since we only have 2 seasons, with at least 2 more to go I guess I can hope they come back to these issues... but: [Under the cut plus some spoilers for season 3]

Things I would like explained :

1. What did Jesse Manes fund with family money in 1x08 ? I'm guessing it was surveillance of the town and the search for more aliens that could have escaped the military in 1947-1948. The idea that Jesse funded Caulfield is just laughable to me, along with how he was able to get his Army-assigned son moved from Germany to New Mexico for 5 years and no one noticed?? Caulfield has to be separate from whatever Jesse was doing in Roswell. Clearly there is still an ACTIVE military project focused on aliens because Flint isn't AWOL, Flint also takes Noah's body to Area 51, so where was Jesse in violation of his orders (Alex's threat to Jesse in 1x08 and then shipping him to Niger)? Surveilling citizens and setting up cameras all over town?

2. Did they ever build an Air Force base on the Fosters Homestead Ranch? (1x01-1x02) ...then it's never mentioned again.

3. I am aware I am the only one who cares about this little bit, but the show seemed to set up a narrative in season 1 about the spotlight Roswell shined white victims of crimes - like Katie and Jasmine, that the town of Roswell holds quite a lot of racism regarding justice- vilifying Rosa for over 10 years, ignoring the deaths of people around Ranchero Night, and then Noah kills Wyatt Long's best friend Hank Gibbons in 1x13. I dunno, I was expecting more from Wyatt in season 2 about this than picking a fight with Michael over Mimi's missing persons sheet and showing up with a crossbow in 2x04. And like, there was a theme of people going missing in season 2!! Mimi, Jenna, the weird twins from 2x06, Charlie -- but yet, no closer scrutiny by Sheriff Valenti other than her focus on Max Evans and the story about Mexico- Like this felt not like a plot hole, but a dropped narrative -- to wrap up the fate of Racist Hank in a missing persons sheet in 2x01. To treat him weirdly like all of Noah's other victims (who were women and men of color and poor), but for a few factors like he was white, he had actual lines in the show over a couple of episodes, and he's one of the few townspeople we learn his first and last name still sticks out in my mind as strange. The Doylist explanation is the actor wasn't available for season 2, but the Watson-perspective of this is just someone the in-show universe doesn't care about ...? Okay. I will keep that in mind, and try to ignore the fact that the town of Roswell swings wildly back to caring about white victims again in 2x13 with Jesse Manes.

4. The Alighting from 1x13 - just how far away was it from happening? Noah was ready to stick a sheriff's deputy, the town event planner and Michael (who probably would be been the only one to go missing without much fanfare, except maybe by Alex) into a pod...for how long? Months? Years? What was his endgame? how did he expect to go unnoticed by the town while he waited for his alien salvation/alien UBER to arrive? Could he just mindwarp everyone into forgetting about the pod squad? Since we didn't see any alien ships show up in the six months from 1x13 to 2x13, and no further follow up by any of our heroes about what Noah was babbling about... I'm going to say this should come back into play for season 3, otherwise it's the most egregious plot hole from season 1.

5. Why did Flint want to work with Helena? Jesse had this master plan that Helena knew all about apparently but she never shares the plan with Flint? Jesse never shares this plan with Flint either? Why? As far as I can tell from the plot of season 2, Jesse takes the console piece from Alex, he was going to kill Alex to keep him out of the way, use the console to blow up civilians, he created a paper trail that pointed the finger at Max, and then when everyone knew the truth about aliens, he was going to use HIS atomizer bomb to release the toxin that Charlie had already developed for Project Shepherd to kill all the aliens.... WHY would Flint want to stop that, especially since they fight in 2x11 over how slow Jesse was moving in his plans? Other than objecting to killing Alex, why would Flint turn Alex over to Helena to blackmail Michael into building a second atomizer bomb? He should have just kept Alex out of the way until it was all over and let Jesse proceed with his plans. Flint's desire to work with Helena Ortecho remains a plot hole to me, that is explained in the most flimsy way of he thinks his dad isn't serious about killing all the aliens even though he has the means? And if he takes Alex from Jesse's control so easily, why not steal the bomb Jesse had too?

6. These are more gripes about continuity, not really plot holes, but the fact we have this loose timeline of events but it doesn't match the weather of filming.... Like Heather Hemmens looked so gorgeous in that little silk outfit in 2x01, but she's wandering outside in Dec in Roswell New Mexico looking like that. I get that it was filmed in August/Sept of 2019 but come on... so my main frustration is I have no idea what season and month is supposed to be on screen. Universe timeline says Winter but filming schedule meant it was early fall with still having the heat of summer there...then the show ends in May/June in the universe, but we all know RNM wrapped in Dec 2019/Jan 2020 so they are all bundled up in winter again.

7. Also on continuity, small things like Rosa's birthday being wrong, the fact her astrological sign isn't Pieces for either date, openly letting Greg Manes see Rosa, not seeming to care that Liz's ex-fiance hears that Rosa is alive - like i'm sure her "dead" sister came up in conversation between Liz/Diego

- the show gives us this beautiful conversation with Michael sharing his background with Alex in 1x10, but then Alex completely forgets it in 2x04 by dropping some line like "this is what you do with family" when Michael expresses confusion about a height chart. Also, on the same note- the jabs about the Library being a dive bar, also felt like a drop in continuity because Alex knows that Michael just lost his mom (1x12) , the government IS studying aliens, and his brother is in a pod, so like, he has some very valid reasons to drink if that's what he wanted to do with in his life in early season 2!! but, also he knows Michael is a genius??

- Why Alex never mentions Rosa, Isobel's blackouts/why Michael gave up UNM, or even hint about what happened with his dad in the shed during his conversation with Maria in 2x05 is also beyond bizarre to me. It was an "information" dump conversation that Alex still doesn't share all the information he has about a situation and just ends up looking kind of judgmental in my opinion.

- the truck conversation in 2x06 between Maria and Alex, why Maria prompts a girl's name when Alex says he's never been in a real relationship INSTEAD of addressing the very real elephant in the room, Michael Guerin, that they had a conversation about in 2x05- also feels like a gap in continuity.

8. Science wise- the pathogen that Charlie developed? It was supposed to be so specific that it could kill a leader of Al Quada and all of their direct descendants but leave the rest of the population unharmed. [Which um, that's a war crime, but whatever!] How was Maria affected? the DNA they had at Caulfield to develop it - like, Maria was descended from Louise and Louise lived free. The only person that pathogen SHOULD have affected was Michael (if they used Nora to base it on) Unless you're telling me that there's some protein in "alien dna" that is so specific to aliens, that no other human shares it, but also so completely undetectable that Kyle couldn't find it in Maria's blood... ? I suppose it's possible. I hope we get more explanation about that in season 3. It makes me wonder why Caulfield/Project Shepherd ever let Patty Harris go after she volunteered for some study then, and remained content to just pay her medical bills through a fake insurance company? [But also didn't flag Mimi and all the doctors that Maria took her to???]

9. Michael's hand. I'm going to reserve judgment about this, because some of my salt on this is based on season 3 promo pictures, but I really thought that moment in 2x13 when he takes off his hat, while Alex is singing, you see him without the wrapping on his hand, that maybe he found some peace with Jesse dead and demolishing the shed with Alex. But then it looks like the hand-danna is all over season 3, right up until the finale of season 3, so... was that a mistake in wardrobe AND not a beautiful moment of character growth??? I wish I could extend some grace to RNM about that, but alas... see above for why I have trust issues.

10. Perhaps I wasn't watching season 1 closely, but I thought Noah's madness was brought on by the fact he was stuck in his pod? That it was "lower class travel accommodations" and Isobel's scream at 13 got his attention? I assumed that he stayed in the pod, possessing Isobel on and off, right up until he used her body to kill Rosa in 2008, absorbing enough power to break out. So how did Noah find Jim Valenti so quickly? If it was through Isobel's memories, then why did Jim not immediately have Noah, some random alien approaching him about his recently dead daughter, hauled off to Caulfield? Jim pays $1,000 for Rosa's body, putting her in a pod [Noah's broken pod??] and stores her, waiting for...something? An alien to come along to bring her back. So did Jim know about The Savior? Why would Jim work with Noah and vice versa? Again, I'm hoping we get more about this in season 3.

11. Was there a point of keeping Alex in the Air Force? He arranges a place for them to work on bringing Max back, but I feel like anyone could have done that? Like Isobel had money, she could have rented a storage facility. All of the equipment was borrowed from the hospital, not the military. The information about 1947-1948 was from the drives decoded from Caulfield or the AAR report left by Flint in the Project Shepherd bunker (which again was decommissioned, not an active military installation). I could support the decision if it had provided some richness to the plot or some conflict within the character, neither of which really happened. Alex hacking the government and going undercover in the Air Force to protect Michael is basically fanon. I love that fanon, but alas...

12. Finally, the time jump. What year are we jumping into? 2020? 2021? Why does it make me think none of those questions above will be answered.

[sanoiro]

Lucifer 5x09 - Family Dinner -Spoilers & Speculation

Written by Joe Henderson

Directed by Nathan Hope

Nathan Hope has directed

1x02 - Lucifer, Stay. Good Devil 1x13 - Take Me Back to Hell 2x01 - Everything's Coming Up Lucifer 2x07 - Trip to Stabby Town  2x10 - Quid Pro Ho 3x05 - Welcome Back, Charlotte Richards 3x19 - Orange Is the New Maze 5x07 - Our Mojo He will also direct Episode 2 or 3 of S6

Behind The Scenes Video 

Ignore the fact that I accidentally watermarked it with the number 519... 

The Case & Deckerstar

Now we can start with the case of the week.

The murder happens at Golf n Stuff which is rather popular due to the scenes that were shot there for The Karate Kid. Rafferty was actually giddy over that.

So we have a murder. After over 70 episodes we know that the case of the week is somehow connected to the main plot and that it leads to a resolving of Lucifer’s issues or at least a small or big breakthrough.

The victim in this case was burned to death or at least he was… charred. A bit like how Mum ‘enlightened’ Jared in 2x17 but worse.

(In order to make sure most bts are included I have put them in the same file in their original resolution and you need to open the image and zoom. You can do it from your PC, MAC or mobile)

The mini golf has several fun statues like knights and pirates but what was not supposed to be there was the figure at the hole where nearby the victim was found. To be more You might have guessed it has many teeth by the photo and the answer is, it’s a reddish dragon head.

Back in December I came across the props building it and I thought it was cool but I wasn’t aware it was for Lucifer as the account is not affiliated with our crew or production. So imagine my surprise when a friend told me about what she had seen on the lot and going through the archived bts I found the victim photo as well.

You may have noticed it but in two particular episodes more dragons made their appearance. First it was at the second showrunner’s office in 503. There we see a dragon impelled by a sword, it seemed really out of place but I then correlated it with Baphament’s blade which is a representation of Azrael’s blade.

Later on I saw something else. In 508 Pete’s apartment had shelves dedicated to dragon figures as well as some knights. All along I was wondering can I even meta about that? What can it symbolise if it means anything at all? For some reason all I could think was the movie ‘Dragonheart’.

But let’s assume they have laid some hints, so far we have seen that they go very basic on bible and comic material so it’s funny how dragon-like Lucifer was presented in Series 3 of the black label of DC/ vertigo. But there are also more tidbits.

Now in 1x12 you all remember the Angel who was defeating a very Lucifer-looking Satan?

That was a prop. But it is derived by the work of Guido Reni ‘Michael and Satan’ (1636) Who was in turn influenced by Raphael’s painting ‘St. Michael Vanquishing Satan’ (1518) and if we go to Raphael’s early works... St. Michael (1504-1505)

Anyways!

The investigation of this ‘week’s’ case has its usual suspect chase which leads us to an arcade where we can spot some members of the crew doing rounds with the go-carts on that location. What I do know is that we are looking for someone young as far as guest posts go but other than that not much is known. The case seems to be progressing slowly but at some point the murderer appears to want to skip town so the leads bring us to L.A.’s train Union Station.

We also have scenes at the precinct during the case as we have seen from Aimee’s bts but not much is known there. 

Now the suspect might be played by the elusive guest of this episode John Clover whose appearance was posted on Reddit and had sparked the first speculations over the title of the episode.

We should now wonder whether the theme of this episode’s case which takes us to gaming areas has anything to do with how Lucifer views his Father’s appearance in the mid-season finale and whether it will provide him with a resolution to not act in a rush way. The same after all happened with Mum.

Do not forget that Lucifer in Season 2 and especially at the beginning with Mum and when he thought Earl Johnson was his Father, Lucifer’s plans changed as his vengeance turned to a slow paced questioning over why their relationship deteriorated. 

For an Angel who was ‘forced’ - not yet clarified so let’s not take that for granted- to punish the guilty Lucifer seems to be more merciful, understanding and open to explanations in the long run especially with the people who wronged him. Amenadiel, Michael, Uriel, Azrael, Mum, and Earl ‘God’ Johnson.

As Amenadiel said in the Pilot Lucifer away from Hell showed restrain and mercy… Perhaps it is true that we cannot escape from what we truly are. In any case that’s meta talk!

Back to the Union Station. 

In the train station we have a bts where we can see Chloe and Lucifer chasing the suspect and from the photos and videos outside of it we can safely say they are successful on apprehending the murderer.

Now a funny incident was that during the shooting the area was closed to the actual travelers but somehow a Japanese tourist ended up sitting where the background actors were. No idea if it was her Pizza or it was given by the craft service but the girl was obviously bewildered on what was happening. It’s the little absurdities of life I guess…

It seems though as a lighthearted episode at first...

Do not be mistaken, the writers, cast and showrunners have revealed that in S5P2 we enter the emotional and equally dark (In P1 I missed the darkness aside from Pete of course) part of this season. It means that by the end of 5x09 as we roll on the last minutes of this episode, Lucifer is heavily conflicted and a resolution is needed, one that seems to be somewhat provided.

Since P1 I thought it would be weird to have Deckerstar break up for effect, in order to break us, especially since S5 was supposed to be the last season and S6 is effectively from what they imply (again cast and showrunners) an epilogue. So do not expect Deckerstar to break up but on the contrary as we saw Lucifer and Chloe in 507 they pull each other back up. 

It is why I’m wondering what will be unraveled after the arrest of 5x09’s murderer.

The end of the episode takes us at night to L.A.’s Grand Park. The Grand Park is across the City Hall by the way, and for the Christmas season it was decorated with a Christmas tree made out of light bulbs.

In the bts the prominent colour of that tree is deep lilac. That’s where our next Deckerstar moment will unravel. We should also be ready for the Lucifer Universe to acknowledge yet another holiday of the human world, Christmas!

A tiny break here but you should remember that on each side of the elevator we have two bronze plates depicting the transfer of Christ after he was taken down dead from the Cross. So in the most discrete of ways Lucifer’s Universe has acknowledged Christ and perhaps it was because before the Sumerian text set Amenadiel as the favourite son, in Season 1 and for the majority of S2 we knew Lucifer as the favourite one.

On the cross Christ (no I didn’t write Lucifer at first :P) according to the scripts in a moment of lapsed faith “Father, Father why do you abandon me?”. In a way we might meta that for 516 but also for what Lucifer has experienced so far and has so eloquently expressed in 3x11 and in 1x09.  

But back to the Deckerstar moment…

It takes place on the ‘balcony’ above the fountain as the purple Christmas tree is behind them. The setting happens at night and provides the place for our characters to talk, to open up and perhaps even express certain fears but also be urged to take advantage of the current circumstances.

From my perspective is the scene of a couple that talks a difficult matter but at the end of that talk they know each has the other’s back so they can step forward, take that chance and their partner will always be there to catch them if they fall. It is also how we will experience Lucifer finally opening up without Linda probing him. But whatever comes forward also gives space to truths and a realisation which will break our Devil as we have seen from the bts of the next episodes.

We might even have an understanding why ‘I love you’s’ are difficult for Lucifer and for Chloe to also realise that. We might even get Lucifer to say it. Here is to hoping…

On a final note. Maze in this episode seems to have gone MIA but many times we do not see the bts of every scene so all we have is Lesley-Ann’s bts from her trailer during that time. Also do not forget how things ended in 508. Maze did betray Lucifer and with God on Earth... 

The Dinner

This episode is expected to open back to the precinct. The reason is because it is a mid-season finale which means that the in between scenes are not implied but also because of some spoilers we had back in December.

As you remember the actress who played officer Cacuzza had posted on Twitter that she and Lauren were in a ‘very small’ room which had just been painted. That room we can safely say is the ‘evidence room’ and that Cacuzza managed finally to find a way to close the surveillance in order to take a nap.

Now do remember that back in S4 Cacuzza was also the officer who let Lucifer ‘sample’ the drug busts… I’m not sure if that will come back somehow but we do know that Cacuzza will appear later this season, whether alive or not is yet to be seen.

What we do know is from the clues that were given by the actress.

1) She will be in the same room as Chloe meaning we will revisit the evidence room once Dad arrives and perhaps it will be a comic moment? Perhaps a random human will figure things out? But what was interesting is that according to the bts photo we see the actress and Lauren in their own clothes while Dennis is in his ‘Dad/God’ clothes.

2) Both Chloe and Officer Cacuzza were supposed to act distressed and shaken. If we take the ‘I love you’ element from that scene for Chloe let’s remember that the evidence is suddenly a bit of a mess. A glass has broken, the sound and effect will be heard once the time has started running again and they are two cops in a room with no idea of what is happening outside. So perhaps the shaken and distressed effect comes before they open the door (or walk out) and are sure there is no imminent threat.

3) In my opinion in this episode Cacuzza has some lines no matter how brief they might be.

Now the question here is how to proceed.

We obviously have a Family Dinner from which only two bts exist. 

If we assume that the Family Dinner is arranged after the brothers have hid their wings and then Dad has met Linda then the dinner is set up by a very flabbergasted Linda.

I do expect Linda to bow by the way and for this dinner to bring some elements from 1x10 Pops. For this speculation I’ll include the video of the scene from that episode and I’ll try to tie them up with 5x09.

All the episodes in P2 are meant to do a full circle and the writers have based most of their storytelling on the events of S1 and S2.

So first the spoilers of what we know from 5x09 and then the ties we may find with 1x10 and some more past episodes.  

The 11 minutes are quite long but is it really all things concerning? 

Henderson tweeted that there will be 5 actors but as we know know Ellis plays two characters which is why the dinner scene may have taken three days to shoot so we should count six people at the Dinner Table.

The location will be (most probably) at Linda’s house as we have seen from a bts that her main table is full of different varieties of fruits and food in an attempt to recreate an Olympian affluent meal. For Linda is only normal to be out of her element and try to impress God. So far she has been almost killed by his ex, has a child that can be snatched away to the Silver City if she is not deemed worthy perhaps or even because of Charlie’s half genetic code.

Remember there was a stand in actor for Michael 

The problem Linda also faces is that she has supported Lucifer. Yes, he is her friend but how will God react to that? Having a human siding with His rebellious son? Linda as it has been written knows how far pissed off celestials can go and I’m sure she remembers Lucifer’s agony and fear over his Father where Chloe was concerned. So she tries, really tries to present a wonderful setting for the grandfather of her child.

So we do have Linda in the mix. Obviously God, Amenadiel, Lucifer and Michael. That makes us five characters and four actors. Little Charlie also makes an appearance as far as I’m aware as the twin babies were on set and that also contributes on why the scene took so long to be shot. However the babies do not count as the sixth character. Chloe though does.

In short we have:

Linda

God/Dad

Amenadiel

Lucifer

Michael

Chloe

and

Charlie

Another thing we should take into account for this scene is Rafferty’s posted script page of the midseason finale.

While Amenadiel and Lucifer appear shocked and in awe, Michael seems rather pleased. I mean he literally ‘Grins with excitement’.

Amenadiel in 5x03 said that the only one who was talking to the throne meanwhile Henderson as far as I remember in one of the post P1 interviews, revealed that God and Michael have a relationship that Lucifer wishes he had with Him. D.B on one of the virtual cons (or ET interview. I have issues with keeping track of them now) have said that the scene at the family dinner would be gut wrenching and absolutely fall down hilarious’.

So in this dinner we will get to know our characters more and as Ildy and Henderson have said Lucifer will go back being a 14 year old at the Thanksgiving table. That perhaps is the reason why the script episodes 510 and 511were reversed. The last time that had happened was in S1 in order for Lucifer’s vulnerability to not come too soon in the season. In the case of these two episodes I believe it has to do with Lucifer’s emotional state but also the constant collisions he will have with his father in the Family Dinner but also during the Musical episode.

Another aspect to consider is that if 5x09 reminds us a lot of 1x10 -Pops right now and 5x10 the Musical episode is directly influenced by 2x16 - God Johnson.

The next section will now be dedicated to a quick recap of 1x10 - Pops and the possible connection to Michael and his story.

Michael in 5x09 teases Chloe as she is kept captive that there is a bigger plan and ‘Spoiler Alert’ it will be EPIC. That can be left alone as a promise to see more of that plan in S5P2 but before we go forward we should also go back in 2x04 - Weaponiser.

Do you see the parallel? How far Uriel’s view of the ‘Patterns’ could go was always a meta I couldn’t crack. Sure Michael hinted as per one Anon hinted on Tumblr that Michael might have been the one to urge Uriel on Earth to kill Mum and hopefully Lucifer as well. It is also perhaps why we were reminded of Azrael’s Blade in 5x03 - Diablo with Baphament’s blade, the only blade that could kill the Devil. Perhaps that was Michael’s plan back then but it didn’t work out.

But is Michael the big villain? According to the showrunners no. There are more things happening but Michael has a reasoning, has a story, one that explains his deformity and is the hero of his own story as all  the other season ‘villains’ so far were. Mum, Amenadiel, Malcolm, Kinley, even Cain.

What the Interviews say about Michael:

Beginning with the parallel between the dinner we had in 1x10’s dinner and plot, and in what may have in episode 5x09 I would like to remind you- 

- at this point I have censored some spoilers, not speculations, spoilers for episodes of P2 that will not be added in the S&S -

I’ll return to this topic and explore it thoroughly as the S&S are written but for now remember that 1x10 might tell us more than what we think right now and it might take us as a point of reference even up to 5x16.

Between 1x10 and 5x09 we can also wonder what are God’s intentions, can we attribute them all to Michael’s manipulation or it goes beyond that because the showrunners have promised us an emotional P2. I do believe issues are addressed and Lucifer will have to come face to face with some hard truths without that meaning that Dad was always right.

In the Pilot - wait.. Pilot? Yes, 5x09 is an episode that slowly builds us to the very end. There are spoilers and references that need to be addressed from past and future episodes before and after 5x09.

We need to address that in the Pilot, Lucifer told Delilah the very truth he uttered to Linda where he was concerned in S4 (4x08). God has nothing to do with your mess. Like Delilah, Lucifer was putting the blame to others, circumstances and even questioned God. He was wasting his eternal life and his talent, which he eventually found in crime solving.

On cue we get to the scene with Chloe asking God what she is doing to a bar with Lucifer. And what follows is Chloe telling Lucifer how she saw things differently from everyone and she paid for it. That story for me at least rings a bell.

We still do not know why Lucifer was cast out, the actual reason. No matter the sexescapeding with Eve or the rebellion what was the core of all that acting out as Linda called it in season 2? Whatever it was if we go back to 3x11 we will see that Chloe in the Pilot is basically Lucifer in 3x11.

They feel alone, misjudged and while Chloe tries to move on and later in S1 finds what actually happened, in Lucifer’s case he gives up on waiting for forgiveness from his Father until Michael comes, and tells him that even his Fall was a manipulation.

In Pops Lucifer asked something very interesting what did the sous chef wanted? And the answer was to surpass Pops. I do wonder if that’s what Lucifer wanted in a way and of course Michael on Lucifer’s expense. Two ‘children’ fighting for attention but only one was groomed to take over.

Speaking of taking over at the end of the episode of 1x10 we learn that Pops despite what Junior had done still had his son in his mind for taking over the restaurant. Pops believed in his son but allowed him space to grow eventually when everything failed.

If you remember Zadkiel’s spoiler we see that in 5x15 for some reason Lucifer wants to re-join the Host. That aside from a reconciliation shows that like Junior, Lucifer for his own reasons - we do not know what has happened but we will go back to that in the S&S of 5x15 - wants what divine power has to offer.

What happens next is again interesting -censored-. I just want you to see how we do not deal with standalones but everything progresses towards a point, a familiar yet innovative point for the series.

In episode 2x01, Lucifer asks mockingly an offended Chloe who did she thought he took after, his Dad? That happened because Lucifer believed to have taken more after his mother but as we know genetics is a funny thing, Celestial genetics even more so.

God’s absence from Lucifer’s life shaped him. He did drove Lucifer to become something he wasn’t but after 4.5 seasons can we claim that Lucifer and God are nothing alike? 

Maze I believe was spot on on the similarities God and Lucifer held.

Lucifer believes in justice, in truth and is able to love. He has been more of an Angel than any non fallen Angel has ever been so far. 

Amenadiel tricked a dead human to kill Lucifer thus condemning him again in Hell however as we know from Charlotte’s case a redemption was not impossible. 

Uriel wanted to kill his mother and wouldn’t hesitate to kill Chloe in the process. Azrael is basically a liar and manipulator, Remiel would gleefully cut open a human for their half-celestial baby while Michael is really-really messed up.

So what has happened?

Like with Junior, Lucifer was pushed by his Father to become the man he is today. And Lucifer likes what he is, who he is because he sees the change and is even afraid of not being real when that change is questioned or exposed to him.

The same happened with Amenadiel, once he decided to embrace humanity and brotherhood. He changed for the better and became more ‘angelic’.

So yes, Junior’s story does apply to Lucifer on many levels. But Junior didn’t have that dinner with his Father, Lucifer will as they will do two more of his siblings. Some will be hurt, some will feel betrayed and some may walk out.

Which brings us to a very big question. 

Was Mum truthful when she said to Lucifer, his Dad wanted to destroy him? If the answer is yes, how will both deal with that? Because Lucifer may have not totally believed Mum.

If that answer comes to play we should consider it as the common question children come forward to when they learn they were not planned or their parents had opted at first to have an abortion. The fact that they didn’t get on with the abortion or had willingly made a child does affect their feelings towards that child now? Do they regret it? Do they want what that child has become?

These are all tough questions and sometimes the answers are not easy either. Mainly because humans like celestials with human emotions as it seems, are secure and balanced only with the totality of a circumstance. Everything or nothing, the rest in between are not welcome and it’s bound to hurt.

Finally, on this 1x10 weird reminisce. Can we say that Lucifer will be allowed in the end to create something that represents him? I think he may but more about that in 5x16 S&S.

Probably the story will not end with redemption but with Lucifer finally becoming his own person one that resembles a lot of Dad and Dad may accept or even encourage that path. That does not mean he will start anew though

Which brings us back to the adversary of 1x10 - Pops. The sous chef believed that Junior was not worthy of his father’s tolerance and reward so she made sure to destroy his reputation and went as far as trying to kill him. That sounds a lot like Michael.

Michael’s speech towards Maze about what was happening in the Silver City in 5x02 did echo the sous chef words:

So we should wonder if Michael will succeed to a point to ruin Lucifer’s chances and leave Lucifer live with the consequences in the end as our hero learns to move on from whatever injustice happened or the writers will provide a catharsis.

And a final question here… Is Amenadiel really the favourite son? I somehow doubt that, perhaps I’ll be proved wrong as in many interviews Henderson has gone back to Amenadiel’s arc as he learns he is the ‘favourite’ and so far he has not said anything to contradict the belief 2x17 brought to us with so many translated Sumerian words.

But as we said teh Dinner will not be cathartic on the contrary so does that mean that Lucifer eventually walks away? Probably.

At the photos that were posted near Christmas we have two bts one crystal clear and the other more hazy which shows Lucifer at the Penthouse and Dad being there in his white cardigan. I do suspect that meeting at the penthouse happens after the dinner but it does not resolve things between Father and son. it is also possible that it’s why we need the very emotional scene from the musical to be moved forward and 511 script to become 5x10 aired episode.

Perhaps the comment on it’s not just Lucifer who hits the keys was referring to Dad and not Maze in 5x01.

Although we cannot be sure on what will happen in the penthouse and whether Scarlet was meant to join that scene or simply was on set for the day (highly probable) for another scene, we do know that in this episode we had a LUX night. A most perhaps unconventional one.

By this point you know that the writers are ready to address everything or at least make parallels and so somehow we have one with 1x09 - A Priest Walks Into A Bar. This time however it is seems like God Walks Into His Son’s Bar.

If the camera is clear enough we can see God (?) talking to a white person. I would have loved it if it was Dan but I cannot tell for sure.

Whether that visit happens before or after the family dinner I believe it may happen before as the clothes Dennis wore at the lot around that time were different from the white we saw him appear with in the end of 5x08. Of course that does not say much as we will see Dad in the same/similar white clothes in at least three different episodes in Part 2.

Therefore in the conclusion of this S&S we should speculate that the Dinner is placed at the middle of the episode and a resolution is reached for Deckerstar in the end of the episode but Lucifer’s turmoil did fit better through the musical episode hence the change. 

[itsclownhours]

okay so i don’t know if i ever mentioned it but while watching merlin i’ve used a google doc of weird title ideas to rename all of the episodes and now that i’ve finished the series i would like to share with the four people who always like my posts the absolute nightmare that is the contents of this google doc (spoilers ahead, technically, i think)

merlin Things Historians Pretend Aren’t Gay: The Unlikely Adventures of Bitchface and Go Fuck Yourself

1x01 the dragon’s call Neither Boss Nor Employee Paid Enough to Deal With Each Other

1x02 valiant Everyone Should Learn First Aid (This Has Been a PSA)

1x03 the mark of nimueh Let’s NOT Wipe Out Humankind

1x04 the poisoned chalice I Fell Into a Deep Hole

1x05 lancelot You’re Valid, I Support You

1x06 a remedy to cure all ills This Is Absolutely the Right Decision

1x07 the gates of avalon I Go For an Unwanted and Unexpected Swim

1x08 the beginning of the end The Small Child Is Annoying

1x09 excalibur Ya Dun Goofed

1x10 the moment of truth The Regular Fuckface Returns to the Town of Fuckface

1x11 the labyrinth of gedref Guys, It’s Been Three Weeks Since I’ve Eaten a Vegetable: My Destiny as a Bad Cook

1x12 to kill the king Ultimate Showdown: Murder Father versus Murder Daughter

1x13 le morte d’arthur Dreams Do Come True (And That’s Not a Good Thing)

2x01 the curse of cornelius sigan The Good, the Bad, and the Okay I Guess

2x02 the once and future queen The Broken Ribs Poked Our Lungs

2x03 the nightmare begins I Need an Explanation, What Is Going On

2x04 lancelot and guinevere I Approve (This Time)

2x05 beauty and the beast part 1 This Wasn’t the Family Meeting That I Was Expecting Tonight

2x06 beauty and the beast part 2 I Am Saved From Certain Death By Being Killed

2x07 the witchfinder Those Stories Aren’t Real

2x08 the sins of the father How to Traumatize Your Children: 7 Proven Methods to Help You Screw Up Your Kids Deliberately and With Skill

2x09 the lady of the lake Can’t Wait to Tell This Story to My Grandchildren

2x10 sweet dreams Getting Distracted by a Hot Girl Only Leads to Bad Things

2x11 the witch’s quickening The King Can Go Fuck Himself

2x12 the fires of idirsholas Everything is a Goddamn Ordeal in This Family: Top 10 Anime Betrayals

2x13 the last dragonlord I Turned Out Liking You a Lot More Than I Originally Planned

3x01 the tears of uther pendragon part 1 Ask and You Shall Receive...Sometime Next Year

3x02 the tears of uther pendragon part 2 In Which Everything Goes Wonderfully Wrong

3x03 goblin’s gold Let’s Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly-True Memoir)

3x04 gwaine This Is Why I Don’t Socialize

3x05 the crystal cave Man Miscast in Role of Father

3x06 the changeling Successfully Evading Responsibility

3x07 the castle of fyrien The Dumbasses Take a Road Trip

3x08 the eye of the phoenix Tone It Down a Bit, Geez

3x09 love in the time of dragons Hey, Look, Old People

3x10 queen of hearts Running From Your Dad: I Know Exactly What I’m Doing (No, I Don’t)

3x11 the sorcerer’s shadow You’re a Special Kind of Stupid, Aren’t You?: Merlin Makes a Rash Decision

3x12 the coming of arthur part 1 Orphan Does Her Best to Fit in After Horrible Childhood

3x13 the coming of arthur part 2 There Is Absolutely No Way It Can Get Worse (It Got Worse)

4x01 the darkest hour part 1 Oh, Look, a Ghost

4x02 the darkest hour part 2 Unfortunately, I Am Alive

4x03 the wicked day Didn’t See That One Coming

4x04 aithusa I Wasn’t Prepared For Parenthood

4x05 his father’s son I Stab a Bitch: Aggressive Negotiations Make Everyone Hate You

4x06 a servant of two masters And God Said, “Let’s Not Give This Bitch a Break”

4x07 the secret sharer Apparently, Agravaine Does Have Some ’Splainin’ to Do

4x08 lamia The Boys Are Here

4x09 lancelot du lac I Call Shotgun (Said the Dead Man)

4x10 a herald of the new age Possession or Obsession?

4x11 the hunter’s heart I’m Bitter and I Won’t Stop Whining (Solitude Was the Only Logical Ending)

4x12 the sword in the stone part 1 I’m Packing Up My Crayons and Leaving

4x13 the sword in the stone part 2 A Guide to Giving Up

5x01 arthur’s bane part 1 My Boy!

5x02 arthur’s bane part 2 My Boy! Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

5x03 the death song of uther pendragon Way to Go, Dumbass

5x04 another’s sorrow Live Every Crisis Like It’s Your Midlife Crisis

5x05 the disir Why Am I Like This?: Merlin Is a Fucking Bitch

5x06 the dark tower What the Hell? I'm in Hell (I Have a Heated Make-Out Session With My Lifelong Enemy. Who Would’ve Thought?)

5x07 a lesson in vengeance You Know That There Is Nothing That I Love More Than Just Chilling and Drinking Poison. Seriously. I’s Great

5x08 the hollow queen An Unexpected Visit Leads to a Change in Career Paths

5x09 with all my heart A Trip to Memoryville (I Hate It)

5x10 the kindness of strangers Don’t Accept Rides From Strange Relatives

5x11 the drawing of the dark Why Didn’t I Just Walk Away? Oh, Right. Because I’m an Idiot: In Which Merlin Fucks Up

5x12 the diamond of the day part 1 We’ve Been Tricked, We’ve Been Backstabbed, and We’ve Been, Quite Possibly, Bamboozled

5x13 the diamond of the day part 2 How to Mistakenly Assume You Have Everything Under Control

[aspiestvmusings]

ZEP SPOILER PREDICTION?

POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD, SO BEWARE...

BASED ON EPISODE 1x01 - 1x10 + MY PREDICTIONS FOR 1x11 - 1x12

LONG & RANTY POST. NOT SO “POSITIVE” THOUGHTS, SO BEWARE: 

So... I’ve had this “feeling” since the Pilot & I kinda got confirmation for my theory in this weeks episode. And if I combine it with the s1 finale (1x12) episode summary, then it could fit, because “Zoey tries to stop something bad from happening” according to the description. 

Everyone thinks that that’s related to her dad, but... ever since that spoiler came out, I’ve suspected it’s related to someone & something else (even though it is pretty certain her dad will be gone at the end of ep 1x11 or early 1x12). I think that’s a reference to something Simon related instead. 

Zoey’s first “real” interaction with Simon was in the Pilot episode, when she heard him sing “Mad World”. In the latest episode, 1x10 he sang the same song again. And I am predicting that the song MIGHT even be heard the third time during the season...in the finale. (or maybe she’ll just come to realize why she heard him sing that again.. in 1x10)

We’ve seen how Simon has been unable to deal with his grief, to move on, to let go. We’ve seen how it has destroyed him, his relationships... everything. And if we listen to the lyrics (original song by “Tears for Fears”, the extra sad newer version by Gary Jules), and think of Simon’s behaviour (he really is the great pretender”!...as demonstated well in many little scenes in 1x02 & 1x03...for example), I think it’s possible he’s gonna try to go down the same path his dad did. And that’s the “bad thing” Zoey is trying to stop in the s1 finale. 

On this note: I can’t believe that Zoey still hasn’t figured out why Simon was put in her path..at this time. She’s not just supposed to help him, he’s supposed to help her. She’s supposed to learn from him and not make the same mistakes (since she’s not figured that out yet, she’s going down the same path as he is). Simon has been avoiding his grief, and it has made him a mess. He’s not talked with anyone about it..really, he’s not talked about it with his loved ones, and it lead to destroying himself, and his relationships. 

And guess what Zoey has been doing...ever since we met her? She’s avoiding dealing with “her daddy issues”, and it has made her a mess, and ruined many of her relationships (best friends, relatives...). Until she realizes that she’s not supposed to make the same mistakes, and she’s supposed to learn from him, it’s not good. She’s ignored or forgotten (by the next day) all good advice from her friends and family...on this.. and she can’t take it all on her own..she needs to share the grief with people who care about her... to be able to deal...with it all... 

Yet...

                      *************************************************

This weeks episode (1x10) did what I expected, and I know that the show is trying to claim everything Zoey is doing is affected by her grief...and that’s why she’s a mess, and that’s why... all... but I still can’t believe that (even if it’s the “anger” phase of her grief) she still hasn’t figured out that the lyrics of the songs that people sing tell her how she must help them. And she still, to this day, has not helped Simon with his grief. And according to the rules Mo wrote down...that’s “no good” - she must help the person singing...with the “problem” they have. She might’ve not wanted the power & it might not be fair to have to help people...especially at a time when she’s losing her dad... but they established that she must... in order to make all good. 

She can “hear” (thanks to her power) how Simon feels, and yet she hasn’t actively helped him with his grief. And I know the writers are trying to say that it’s because of her own grief (and going through the stages herself), but it has just surprised me how she focuses all her energy on pursuing the engaged (until recently) man...romantically... (obsessively, so), instead of helping him (and instead of focusing on the #1 man in her life..her dad... and I still can’t believe she’s avoided that til now... cause she’s wasted so much precious time... til the very last minute... and she now has so little time left with him...cause she’s been focusing all her energy on trying to repeat her past relationship mistakes... -- and go for the complicated, exhausting for everyone... option,-- ). She’s spent so much energy on obsessing over the engaged (til 4 days ago) man, while claiming she has no time for any romance... (her words & actions don’t match!). 

Her heart song to him in 1x08  also said “didn’t I see you crying?”, so she is (deep down) aware that that’s the emotional state she was him in, and yet they have not had a real, proper, discussion on how to deal with the grief! And hearing him sing the same song again in 1x10 should’ve told her that the man is still “stuck”...still... and that means she didn’t really help him...yet. Which means she must try to help him...again...til it works. (and in helping him she’ll help herself... and learn from his mistakes..and not repeat them..)

Also looking forward to the day when Zoey realizes that the thing that bothers her about Simon is what bothers Max about her: She doesn’t like that Max is pursuing her & yet she is pursuing Simon the same way....at a time when she claims she needs to focus on her dad. She doesn’t like that Simon has no clarity (doesn’t return her feelings... doesn’t want to start anything), but she doesn’t understand that she’s doing the same thing herself...to Max - she has no clarity herself. And if she’s allowed to not like how Simon doesn’t give her an answer & be upset that he doesn’t like her back...then it should be OK for Max to not like how she doesn’t give him/her BFF an answer & be upset that she doesn’t seem to like him back. 

The moment when she realizes tha parallels..is what I'm looking forward to. For her (and some of the viewers) to realize how the things that bother her about Max’s behaviour are parallel how she herself has behaved. (fans claim “Max is pushing Zoey to love him back & going after her...strong”, but what has she done all season? “Zoey has been pushing Simon to love her back & going after him...strong”) The two storylines are exactly the same. And that’s done on purpose on the show. 

She claims she has no time to focus on romance, cause she’s so caught up with her dad & grief, so it’s not the right time to pursue romance, yet she spends much of her screentime actively wishing for & pursuing a romace with Simon. She has the time to go to dinner with him (at a time when I expected her to practically move in with her parents...for the last few weeks), yet she doesn’t take time to actually get her BFF a “congrats on the promotion” gift...when in contrast she gets the “just-broke-up-his-engagement” man a housewarming gift... (she had 4 days to buy that pen/mouse... but she didn’t, but she got the plant for the same night. Same with telling Mo how she’s upset about the Simon news...while not even a mention of Max’s news - move to 6th floor. It’s like they really never were friends...cause she voices no concerns about losing a good programmer & friend...only “worrying” about her office crush...). #WhyAreTheyWritingHerLikeThat  #SheCanGoThroghTheAngerPhaseWithoutBeingExtraRude

To me..that shows just how much she really “cares”. And she might be grieving & a mess..but right now...she does not “deserve” Max...as her BFF (even though she needs her BFF...at this time) Until she’s done processing her grief & done some therapy, and focused on herself... she should do as she says, and focus on her dad, her family, herself. Make her words match her actions. (and yes, this latest ep provided that “turn” ..for her...and all the characters... as the sun will shine again...after the storm... but not before another “storm cloud” passes)

Or...in other news: I LOVED!!! how everyone told their truths to Zoey in this episode. She might be grieving & going through the stages of grief (but so are a lot of people around her....and they don’t create conflicts over this), but that doesn’t make it OK how she sometimes behaves. (Just like Simon grieving does not excuse any of his behaviour...where he was emotionally cheating on his fiancee, and kissing other women while still enaged... etc) So... the scenes where everyone told her the harsh truth...were some of my faves in this episode: Mo, her mom, (even Joan...through looks), Simon, and especially Max!) IMO she really needed to hear all of it! (and more) 

And this makes me sad that I am saying this, but... I wish Max/Zoey wasn’t the endgame...after all this. But it’s a fact that they are. But Max is a much better person than I am. And unlike me (I see the world in black & white only...and while I know it’s very human & all.. I am not a fan of “messy human feelings” -  it’s all just too irrational for my taste), he sees all the colours. And mostly...he loves her..unconditionally, so he’ll “forgive her”. But for me her indecisivness, “1 step forward, 2 steps back” w. Simon (”we’re done, this is over, no more” claims... which she takes back/forgets the very next moment/episode... because... -- she won’t be doing this no more.. but then she finds out his engagement ended...so she’s back obsessing over pursuing him...even though she just made a promise to herself to not do just that --) behaviour, and all that.. cannot be “excused” or “explained” with grief. It hasn’t worked...on screen...for me. But it has allowed some TOP acting from Jane, and Skylar, and John, and Alex...and everyone else. This  cast just keeps being amazing!

But no matter how much I’ll “fangirl” over the S1 finale M/Z moments and possible future M/Z endgame... for me it’s not the payoff... anymore (due to how S1 was written) ..it’s gonna be the unfortunate end result. Some people love TV drama, I just aren’t a fan of such messy drama... I’m simply too rational to get irrational behaviour (what writers & people call “very human” & “this is what grief & hurt does to a person”). I get the intent & get the reasons behind it, but it’s too irrational for me to like it. (cheating is cheating, you can’t take back what you’ve said/done...especially if you make the same mistake again...) #hurtpeoplehurtpeople

I’ve expressed some of these every thoughts in my previous tags and online comments... and now I just have confirmation from the ep that they did really take the exact route I did not ever want the show to take (once is a mistake, twice/three times is a pattern...). But nonetheless... M&Z is endgame. So...my only hope & wish is that there will be a S2, so we would see REALLY work on earning back her BFF (Max’s) trust and friendship. She has to work for it IMO. And she must be compleely honest with him...as she promised...and this now includes telling himall about her grief, “the triangle”, her moments with the engaged/just broken up man... That is the one thing that is a must. 

(And no, Max isn’t that much hurt because she didn’t ask him to stay or petty cause she doesn’t return the feelings, he’s upset cause no-one even came to say “good luck”, and his best friend didn’t even bother to get him the “good luck gift” - to him it’s like confirmation that they don’t care or appreciate him as a co-worker. It’s like his peer reviews... He’s said why he’s upset. And he’s not upset cause she doesn’t return his feelings, cause through her heart song he knows for a fact that she has romantic feelings for him + he noticed how she checked his body out (Mo’s makeover)...and that “she’s his”. He’s upset that even though she has feelings for him, she avoids them & him. And that she’s pursuing the engaged man, making him her second choice & no one wants to be the “other/second (wo)man””. She claims she can’t do more than friendship right now...cause of everything related to her dad & yet... she is pursuing more than friendship with the other guy... so once again she wasn’t honest with him... and that’s gotta hurt cause they’ve been BFFs forever...)

This latest episode, once again, used parallels...lots of them. 

Z: “You should know...what you did yesterday was really rough.”

M: “I was just..taking care of me. It wasnt personal.” 

Z: “When I told you aboout my powers, I also told you I was gonna be 100% honest with you, do you remember that? OK, so here’s the truth: I think it is personal. I think youre mad at me. Youre mad at me for not saying what you wanted to hear. And now youre trying to teach me some kind of a lesson.” 

M: “Oh, is that what you’re think?” 

Z: “That’s what I think. Why else would you take the 6th floor side? You’ve been there wor whoppin 2 days.”

M: “I dont know. Maybe because people actually like me on the 6th Floor. Do you know that Ava has said to me mor ein those 2 days than Joan  has in the last 5 years? Oh and it’s also a huge opportunity for me and my career. have you ever thought about that?” 

Z: “So you’re just gonna leave behind everybody that helped you get there? Is that the idea?” 

M: “See it how you wanna see it.” 

Z: “Nobody down here understands why Ava wanted you in the first place. Just FYI.” #ThisWasLowAndTotallyCruelThingsToSay

M: “Maybe it’s becase I’m a good person.” 

Z: “...or a very selfish one.” 

M: “YOU are calling ME selfish? Look... I have spent far too much time worrying about other peoples happiness more than my own. Especially yours. And I think that its finally time I focus on my own happiness for a change.” 

Once again the use dialogue about one relationship to parallel another relationship. If we change the words a bit & apply it in reverse, we get: 

M: “You should know...what you did yesterday was really rough.” [their 1x07/1x08 conforntation - her revealing she has feelings for him...but then taking back the words & running to another man... while claiming your focus has to be only on your dad]

Z: “I was just..taking care of me. It wasn’t personal.”

M: “When you told me about your powers, you also told me you were gonna be 100% honest with me do you remember that (Think back... have you really been that?)? OK, so here’s the truth: I think it is personal. I think you’re mad at Simon. You’re mad at Simon for not saying what you wanted to hear. And now youre trying to teach me/him some kind of a lesson.”

Z: “Oh, is that what you’re think?”

M: “That’s what I think. Why else would you avoid your best friend & obsess over an engaged man...while claiming you can’t deal with romance at this time when you should focus all your energy on your dad? You’ve known the new guy for a whopping 2+ months...compared to your best friend of 5 years.”

Z: “I dont know...:” 

M: “So you’re just gonna leave behind everybody that helped you get here (ditch your best friend, end your traditional movie nights together, dive into yet another overly complicated-exhausting for everyone-not good relationship with an engaged & grieving man...? You’re avoiding the most important man in our life = your dad, & dealing with your grief, you’re pushing away your best friend, whose always been there for you. And you’re opening up to a stranger instead of your best friend...and saying that’s a positive behaviour. Is that the idea?”

Z: “See it how you wanna see it.”

And Max’s decision in 1x09 & 1x10 was explained by Zoey's speech in 1x09..once again the two storylines are parallels as I already mentioned after last ep: 

Z: “I will never be “the other woman”. Nonetheless..I care about you. A lot. We have a chemistry & a bond that’s undeniable. And I guess I was hoping that after the kiss you’d have some clarity... about all of it. Clarity ... you still don’t have. And maybe never will. So... I have to make a change.... instead of just sitting around, and waiting...and hoping for something to happen...So..this is me...saying to you...officially... I can’t, and I won’t do this anymore. 

If we change the words a bit & apply that to M/Z, we get  why Max made his decision & what he’s really saying to her: 

M: “I will never be “the second choice (when youre my first...but clearly I am only 2nd choice for you)”. Nonetheless..I care about you. A lot. We have a chemistry & a bond that’s undeniable. And I guess I was hoping that after the heart song you’d have some clarity... about all of it. Clarity ... you still don’t have. And maybe never will. So... I have to make a change [move to 6th floor, putting distance between us].... instead of just sitting around, and waiting...and hoping for something to happen...that might never happen. So..this is me...saying to you...officially... I can’t, and I won’t do this anymore.”    

She is a complete mess & she still doesn’t realize the parallels. How what bothers her about Max’s behaviour (towards her) is exactly what bothers Max about her behaviour. If she feels she “has the right” to be upset with Simon over these things (no clarity, not telling her he likes her back), then she has to realize that her BFF also “has the right” to be upset with her...over the same things. And she keep projecting...her own fears and denial..into others. And I get what the writers wanted to say, but for me personally... it’s made me dislike the character, and the writing, and all, because I don’t really “understand” why she/writers would “excuse” it all with her grief making her “act crazy”. She keeps avoiding her best friend & her dad’s situation.

We know that it’s because with Max she’s got a lot to lose (the connection is deeper, there’s more to lose), while with Simon it feels “easy” and theres nothing to lose, cause they don’t have that deep connection. Just grief bond....which she keeps mixing with something other. And she doesn’t listen to reason from her friends: Mo, Max... and they can’t help her get through this all if she won’t let them in... 

And in the next eps...when THE DAY she’s been most scared of..arrives (her dad), shes gonna need her best friend, Max. And he’ll need her, cause he was close to Mitch, too. So they’re both gonna acively grieve. But before that they needed/need to “have hard conversations” and be completely honest with each other. The 1x10 “fight” was the turning point, now they just need time to figure things out...separately (as individuals, not as a duo) and realize...things. 

[intothewickedwood]

Once Upon A Time Rewatch: 4x11 Heroes and Villains

Still enjoying reading Once Upon A Time: Reawakened. Spoilers: you know that deleted scene where Archie and David are at the Rabbit Hole in 1x12? David was actually watching Mary Margaret because he didn’t want or trust her to go on the girl’s night out. Like whaaaat? They made David a bit controlling in the book. I’m not sure if that was the original plan for the deleted scene.

Back to the rewatch

I’m not ready to say goodbye to the Frozen characters! I love them so much! I really, really enjoyed their arc! 

Ice magic is so cool!

There’s forever a problem with the town line lol xD.

Killian’s being super shady.

Rumples really enjoying squeezing Killian’s heart.

“When the stars in the sky align with the stars in the Sorcerer’s hat…” What does it mean??!

Did Gold put some kind of sleeping spell on Belle? 

That gauntlet’s pretty cool.

Oh. I don’t think she was under a sleeping spell. She’s just a really heavy sleeper.

Rumple hasn’t told Belle that there’s no coming back once you leave SB!

Marelena unfroze!

Why did she need her heart in her chest to wake up? And I thought Zelena had protective enchantments on her heart.

Why is Marelena telling Regina she’ll step aside?

Aww. Belle and Henry bonding! Is this the only time they interact? 

I’d love to hear about more of the magical objects Rumple has collected!

Doggy dog! 

It’s clearly not Pongo but I wonder if there’s any relation.

It’s so cwute!!

Come back puppy!

LMAO!! Belle got kidnapped by a freaking gorilla :’D!!

It’s actually quite creepy though. Where’s its face??!

Am I currently frightened of a gorilla monster? It just made me check the foot of my bed. You never know!

Killian’s acting so strange. I mean, I know he’s being controlled but I guess this is how Rumple thinks he acts.

But I don’t want them to go!

Rumple! She got taken by a half man, half gorilla-man monster!

Is that Diablo? Just looked it up. Apparently it is! It’s interesting that they gave Cora a raven/crow too. Maybe it was a nod to Diablo.

Oh no!

I can’t help wondering if Zelena faked still being cursed somehow. The fact that the curse no longer affected her when she returned as herself to SB would suggest she was only pretending. But then, can she emulate ice magic? 

Rumple, holding Regina’s hand: “I’m about to get everything I desire. As unbelievable as it sounds. I want the same for you.” He seemed genuine! That’s interesting that he wants that for her. They have been through a lot together.

I know she can’t see him but it’s a bit awkward him kissing Regina when he can see who he thinks is his wife there.

What would have happened if Regina’s hand had gone over the town line? Would it be stuck there?

Aww. Little Roly playing drums on his daddy’s back. So cute!

Maleficent can turn herself into a flock of ravens? That checks!

Was Cruella the gorilla? If so, she’s changed her outfit. Maybe Maleficent can turn into a gorilla too??

It seems like only Maleficent can teleport out of the 3 of them and allow others to teleport. They call Ursula ‘the Sea Witch’ but does she have magic powers? According to wiki she can spell cast and she has mermaid magic but do we ever see her use it? They should have done more with her hypnotic voice. That could’ve been fun!

Omg Rumple this is the third time you’ve said “when the stars in the hat align with those in the sky..” I can’t stop laughing! It really tickles me!

No!! Don’t go Elsa and Anna and Kristoff!! You guys are awesome! I’m gonna miss you so much!

Frozen Swan has to part :’(. Now kiss. That hug!!

Glad Anna stayed behind to tell them about Gold.

Now put the hat on Killian’s head lol.

It darn exploded!

I wonder what it feels like to teleport. Is it as painful as apparition?

This Rumbelle scene is emotion!!

Rumple: I don’t wanna lose you. Belle: You already have.

Anna’s getting married!

I really don’t want them to go! I wish we got more of them in later seasons! 

Chocolate!

I love them! My heart hurts!

This has been on my mind for years but are Granny’s Inn and Granny’s Diner in the same building? Just checked. Apparently not! I prefer it that way.

Wow! Cool! Why does the Sorcerer have blank books?

Did Rumple tutor all the Queens of Darkness?

I knew he could easily get the gauntlet back from them.

How does Ursula even recognise Rumple without his scales? I’m not sure I would. 

Uh oh. Regina put ideas in Rumple’s head about changing his story.

[persefoneshalott]

Fred disappointed me.

[lostinafictionaluniverse]

Riverdale episode 12 is titled “Anatomy of a murder” 

[mtvswatches]

Wynonna Earp 1x13 I Walk the Line

Wynonna Earp 1x12 House of Memories

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) Well…

Can you shoot them?

Yes.

Should you shoot them?

Also yes.

Do they need to be shot?

Yas.

2) They just threw her out of the window! Priceless!

3) Noononononononono

4) So… for a second there it seemed as though Bobo would be able to cross the threshold but then he started burning up, and I thought: “Yes! That means that Willa is NOT the true heir!” But of course, they needed Peacemaker, and she was like “but I have it” and again I was “Yes! That means that Willa is NOT the true heir!” but… it wasn’t the real Peacemaker. Bless Waverly – I’m assuming it was her who came up with this idea… - but when exactly did she pull off the switcharoo? Or did we see that and I just forgot about it?

5) Please tell me that’s not fucking Clootie…

Who would get her out of her comfy hole?! And more importantly, WHY?

6) Oh, my god, bitch, you’d better die in this episode!!

I KNEW IT! I knew I shouldn’t trust you, you duplicitous wannabe-heir!

7) She’s so fucking disgusting, I can’t get over it????

WILLA: Maybe we have time for a quickie. You screw me, and then we screw this town.

For a second, I thought that she might be trying to play Bobo, but no, she’s just a fucking nasty bitch, that’s all.

8) Oooh, Doc is ready to pour some tea…

And Dolls’ explanation…? 

It's just medicine. Look, I've taken this since I was a kid. It helps keep me alive and some parts of me dead.

9) Nicole just saw the weapons stash and got all wet. That’s my girl.

10) I also love her reaction to being brought up to speed. She was like, “Finally, thank you!” Like, seriously, it comes to a point in supernatural shows where it is disrespectful to the characters to keep them in the dark about the supernatural.

11) Seriously, dude, if anyone is a cancer is yourself, just take a look in the mirror.

12) So… Willa is still looking for Peacemaker so it can’t have been her who put Waverly to sleep and kidnapped her…

13)  It was fucking Chrissy who got Waverly!

14) Ay, Wynonna, why aren’t all your alarms going off right now? Everything Willa has said so far is giving her away… She couldn’t care less about Waverly’s safety, she’s only concerned about getting Peacemaker back and she just wants to off all those “meatsticks” – her words – so I hope Wynonna is not that gullible…

15) Same initials as Jesus Christ? What’s this dude’s name?

16) So, on top of all the other evil things about him, Bobo’s also a pedophile, right? I mean, Willa must have been a teen when they “fell in love”, right? Can someone please help with the timeline?

17) So the bitch is showing her true colors…

I really love this! If I think back to episode one, I would’ve predicted that Waverly would be the optimistic, naïve sister in contrast to Wynonna’s cynicism and untrustworthiness. But Waverly is intuitive like Bobo said, and she is damn smart. So while everyone else was celebrating Willa’s return, she held her guard up and watched. Ugh, Waverly has the potential to be my favorite…

18) OMG the fucking bitch just shot Nicole!! After Wynonna gave up Peacemaker because WAVERLY SAID THAT SHE LOVED NICOLE!!!! I swear to God, if Willa is alive after this episode I’ll fucking go and murder her myself!

19) Oh thank god she was wearing a bulletproof vest! And she’s also got Wynonna’s approval…

20) Now, this?

This is rather epic…

21) I knew the Sheriff was going to stand up for Wynonna, he’s been slowly but surely turning into a somewhat decent man, has come a long way since his misogynistic remarks from episode one.

22) Guys, I’m really into this. Now Wynonna has to save all the townspeople, who are literally placing their lives on her hands. Like, it’s literally full circle since episode one and I’m loving it!

23) DOLLS ALSO GOT SHOT?! WTF IS THIS SHOW DOING?!!!

24) Oh, no worries, false alarm…

HE’S JUST A FUCKING MONSTER!

25) Okay, I’m genuinely scared of Dolls?

26) Why didn’t Dolls let Wynonna touch him? Are the drugs he’s taking contagious or something? Again, they really don’t seem like medicine…

27) I’m not gonna lie. I’m super excited about watching Doc and Wynonna teaming up and shooting up everyone’s assholes into hell.

28) WTF Waverly!

Is she really trying to reason with Bobo…?

29) Okay, so… Willa was thirteen… when Bobo “fell in love” with her…

30) Shit, I did not see that coming…

But at least he has some decency left in him, he protected her from Willa…

31) Oh, Waverly, I want to hug her…

32) So many Spuffy “Touched” vibes, the feels are real…

WYNONNA: Come on, Doc, spit it out. DOC: Spit what out? WYNONNA: You know, the rousing old-timey speech that's gonna make me believe I can take on my own sister. Come on. WWWD. What Would Wyatt Do? DOC: I once had a dog the name of Plucky. WYNONNA: Your big pep talk is "Plucky"?

33) ISTG! Why am I such trash for ships like this?!

34) Seriously, though, doesn’t this whole conversation give you Spuffy vibes?!

WYNONNA: Willa's got Peacemaker. Bobo's got telekinetic powers. What do we got?

DOC: Things that go boom.

WYNONNA: She's better than me, Doc. Faster. I don't think I can beat her.

DOC: But you are still gonna try.

WILLA: I have to.

DOC: Careful, Earp. Doing what's right even in the face of ridiculous odds? You are beginning to sound like a hero.

35)  Okay, so… Dolls’ superiors want to kinda let Bobo cross the border and see what happens? And she called Dolls a monster, and I’m guessing it’s not a metaphor…

36) Bobo was ricocheting the bullets like fucking Neo or something and then…

A fucking grenade!!!

37) Wait…

That fucking JC guy said that if the heir crossed the limits with hatred in her heart they would all go to hell or something, didn’t he?!

38) Oh my fucking god Wynonna, just fucking shoot her!!

39) Dolls shot her…

And this snake thingy definitely has some Buffy vibes…

40) Oh, damn, this wasn’t as satisfying as I had expected…

41) Yep, this was epic…

But what does it mean about the borders?

42) And they’re taking both Bobo and Dolls…

43) “We know what you did.” What the fuck did she do?!

44) Wait, are they going to blow up the whole town?! Why did that bitch say “Boom”?

45) So… the revenants want to leave the triangle, but there are other thingies that want to get in…

46) …

She put him out of his misery… wtf!!! No more Bobo?! (and I’ve just realized how ridiculous that question sounds)

47) WTF!!

Waverly, why on earth would you touch a sticky substance in a hellhole like Purgatory?! And why is this show not over with the plot twists?!

48) WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

49) What an awesome season finale! I enjoyed literally every second of it, the surprises kept on coming and I didn’t have time to deal! I’ve got to so many questions?! Who’s the old one Bobo mentioned? What possessed Waverly? I’m positive she couldn’t have shot Wynonna, but who or what did she shoot? Is Bobo really gone? Or will he be back? Who’s Waverly’s father?! And how the hell is Wynonna going to manage to keep the revenants from getting out while guarding off the things that want to get in?

This show has everything that I love about supernatural shows, and I’m super into it! I can’t wait to start watching season 2!! And if you have any questions about my feelings/opinions about season 1 stuff, hit the ask box!

50) There are more comments in this recap than minutes in the episode, btw.

51) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!