#thanks for all the patience broskis

[the-slasher-madame]

Hey it’s me again lmao. I loved the last head cannons you did for me so I wanted to come back. Can you maybe do head cannons for teaching Brahms, Vincent and Thomas how to crochet? I’m learning myself and I think it’s pretty fun. Thank you stay groovy <3

I will eternally groove my humble broski, just for you. Ahhh I love this cause I knit!!! I was knitting a blanket but I vastly underestimated how much yarn I would need, so it may just be a scarf instead (I was gonna knit in strips...it may not be a single strip). My aunt crochets, she'd make dresses for my dolls when I was younger. Enjoy dear!!!

Brahms Heelshire:

This is going to go one of two ways. One, he will lose his goddamn mind. Rage quits like he's fighting sans in Undertale. Cannot sit still long enough and has no patience for the needle and the possible issues of A) the yarn starting to unravel or 2) it's too small/big for him to work with well

Personally, I don't know if that's my favorite. I think the second way it goes is he picks it up instantly (or maybe even already knows how, it seems like something his mother would do it and he'd pick it up to pass the time in the walls/connect to his mother, or she made him learn how to)

Going on the second path, he fricking loves it. Perfect way to fidget, to have a part of him moving. He'd make y'all a blanket to like, celebrate/commemorate your relationship. Then he moves on to beanies (I need him in a beanie like yesterday).

I do think he would get frustrated at first, especially if he's trying to make you something. He also could spend hours looking for yarn online. Could, would, and will

He'd make plushies, but you would have to beg him to. After he makes one, he's hooked (get it? Hehe). Would absolutely make stuffies of you and him, any pets y'all may get, favorite animals, everything (do you need like a pattern/recipe for crocheting plushies? And if anyone knows how to read a knitting recipe let me know haha-)

I love the image of you coming back from a very brief grocery run and he has some granny glasses on, the ones with the beaded string around the back, and he's just working away on a blanket

Relating to that, he stress-crochets. I've stress-knit before, and I can see him doing that if you have to go out for any period of time (keeps his stuffie of you in his lap and talks to it until you get back).

You have unlocked Granny Brahms, before long he starts baking apple pies Vincent Sinclair:

I'm a fairly crafty fellow myself, and I have a personal mission to learn as many types of art as possible. Vincent is the same way, and considers crocheting to fit under this category.

I don't think he has trouble with it at all, he's got pretty nimble fingers and can keep track of the yarn and the hook

I can also see him with the granny glasses, sitting by candlelight in the house or his workshop. AND he already worries about you like a grandmother, it fits perfectly lol

Loves making blankets and throws to stash around the house (IDK why it's hotter than hell in Louisiana). Would try to make things to make the town look more lively, and would store his extra blankets in one of the houses

AKJHFHD I can see him having certain sets of blankets for different seasons, like how clothing brands have the fall sets and winter sets and whatever? He's serious about his blankets

HE'D MAKE JONSEY LITTLE HATS AND BOOTIES OH MY GODDDDD

Would probably explore making plushies on his own, and gift you with one, then another one, and another one, and maybe just one more- (I am attached to my stuffies, even if mine aren't crocheted).

I don't think he'd make a family of stuffies like Brahms, but he'd absolutely make one of you to keep on his desk

Makes Jonesy toys, absolutely

Has a wide, varied range of yarn, and if he has to ask one of his brothers to get him yarn, he is very specific. This man is an artist, he will have the right color and he will dumb it down for his brothers to make sure they get the exact shade he needs

No he'd paint little cards with the color he needs 😭

I think he would like crocheted tops, both for the statues and for you. . . Thomas Hewitt

Ohhh this man is another crafty one, already has like a case full of hooks

It'd be cool to think he might have crocheted his first masks, not sure I'm sold on that but food for thought

Luda would teach him to crochet, it gives him something to do especially when he can’t play with the other kids and switches over to homeschooling

Makes blankets, even if it’s entirely too hot in tex-ASS to wear skin let alone fabric

Anyways along the lines of Luda Mae teaching him, she’d always look out for different colors she thinks he may like. Buys him yarn and hooks and is overall the supportive mother we all want and need

I think he’d also like crocheted clothes👀and he would kill Hoyt for even breathing lewdly near you

Plushies. Makes all the plushies. Makes you all the plushies. Every farm animal imaginable. They are yours

OMG WHAT IF HE HAD SHEEP AND MADE HIS OWN YARN THA’D BE SO CUUUUTE

Thomas makes his own yarn confirmed

I think he’d be really patient with crocheting, but he might get a little frustrated with smaller yarn and hooks cause his fingers are kinda big (yummy)

Awww no what if he made potholders for the kitchen, OH AND MAKES LUDA MAE GIFTS FOR HER BIRTHDAY NO CAP

One time, Hoyt said it was “wrong” and emasculating (not his words, he doesn’t know what that means) for Tommy to crochet, so Tommy crocheted a blanket with the phrase ‘fuck you’ on it and gave it to Hoyt for his birthday

Luda chuckled and told Hoyt he got what he got, Tommy was grinning under his mask, and Monty laughed and stole the blanket (and still uses it to this very day)

Ok I tried!!!! I loved this prompt so much, knitting and crocheting are so much fun and these are the three that I feel like would enjoy yarn crafts. I hope you like it!!  <333333

[heeracha]

broski i have tremendous patience for u 😢 do yk how much i was dying when u separated heeyn for 6 years in botm.....i am basically immune to anything now all thanks to u bestie 😄 everyone thank robi for putting us in gut wrenching pain <3 moty 💪🏻 masochist of the year SLAYYYY jk ily 🫦 -barnonymous

yk funny thing,,,, supposedly it was for eight years BAHVSHAAHSAAHAAHLS <333 i give u immunity ig lmaoooo,,, CRYING ???? MOTY ??? ABFHSBHAB ily more <3

[lazyfurreh]

For introduction!!

I'm Furreh, Lazy Furreh. I draw, I games, I sleep. :]

Pronouns: [she/he/they] or any

Age: [should not be tell in social media]

Pros and cons to connect with me:

CONS:

- I can't handle conflict or vent,

- I may be avoidant but I do still care (still working on it)

- I might test someone's patience

- will literally make [not family friendly] jokes

- Furry

PROS:

- I love interacting with people who had the same interest

- might draw for u

- loves making memes

- can call, voice note, or vid call with you if had a chance

- cares about u )))

- totally chill person

More about me:

Hey broskis and homies, I am a chill azz guy that might crawl up under ur bed just for a hug.

I have difficulties with planning and focusing, which not cool person do but I've tried.

I like to draw and we all know that, but don't u know that I can sew, cosplay, and games. I mostly like zombie games btw.

I love interacting with new people, but also have difficulties with avoiding issues, I don't likes conflict much they overwhelm me. So please be respectful for someone boundaries and do not vent all of a sudden, unless I consent.

If I'm inactive, I'm totals fine it's been a rough time to grow up and meet new things so I have to brace myself and ignore my social medias.

I love the color of black, red, and white. There so interesting to look at.

Btw I make dad jokes, so beware Urself. I also make flirty jokes as like a joke, no romance attach. So if your uncomfortable, TELL ME!

I have aromantic spectrum, don't get too close to me if you're looking for relationship. It's for Ur own good broski.

I in many fandoms like:

- SPRAKLECARE

- LAPFOX

- SANSES AUS

- REGRETEVATOR

- PHIGHTING

- OBJECT SHOW

Another thing:

Whoever is a proshipper, GO AWAY!! And many many more problematic people like racist, Zionist, e.c.t

I hope all that help u guys know me more, thanks for the reads cyaa

[regrettablewritings]

Ok, I know you just said that you write a lot for Bruce (it's because your images/headcanons of him are just beyond amazing and it's never enough) but number 3 screamed Bruce Wayne to me. If you don't feel like writing about him again it's totally fine 💖 And then, if you don't mind me asking 13 for Cassian and 12 for Steve Harrington. 💞 Thank you so much and kudos on your writings, they are really the best around here.

Oooohhh yeah that Bruce Wayne one sings to me . . . But . . . *deep inhale and somber exhale* Gotta stick to my guns, broski. 😔 Just gotta. I haven't written for Steve Harrington in a while, though, and I miss the old noodle boy. So I think I'll go with him!

12. What they do for their anniversary:

Sorry to say this, folks, but Steve is one broke and uncreative bitch. However, he is also an endearing broke and uncreative bitch.

When the two of you started to date, he was a recent high school grad with next to no real money. You thought he was working that humiliating job at Scoops Ahoy for the sailor uniform? Think again: It was because old boy needed some type of funny money! And given the occurrences that claimed his place of business . . . Yeah, it's back to square one with that.

Hawkins is a pretty small town, but he'll be damned if he can't piece together something for he two of you to do. So even if those somethings are catching a movie and grabbing dinner and then treating you to ice cream in the park, he's honestly sorta proud of himself.

. . . Please be proud of him, too, it may not look it but he worked so hard to make it work --

Thankfully, you're pretty understanding: You're pretty broke, too, after all. And it's never been like you to ask for the moon anyway, let alone a five-star dinner. So in a way, it's actually pretty cute to see the guy you knew in high school to be a dick actually be a sweet-hearted puppy. Even if his ideas aren't the most innovative.

On that note, please never be afraid to suggest something to him, he'd be super grateful because he just wants you to have a good time but also sometimes he's at a loss --

Hope that came out okay! Thanks for your patience!

[sadmistergeek]

hiatus is over

Niggga!!!!!!

Todays date is 11/7/21 

Life going 100000mph. 

My grandma made her transition 

I worked a shit hole job renting cars for a year and became an insurance agent for a bit and both those was trash. Finally doing some shit I can picture myself doing long term and my company actually fucks with people of color and openly. N

ot like the bullshit fake woke companies from the late George Floyd. I got a chick I been with for almost 2 years now but when I tell you this broad will test my patience. Sometimes I be wondering if I should be like the og who came to barber school when I was locked up talking bout all his trips with the boys with his wife at home but smashing side chicks all over but keeping his wife straight finally.. lol what more can they ask for. 

Idk.. fucking covid-19 literally changed the way the world functions, prices have gone up and people are affected by mass hysteria and tricked into doing shit they normally wouldn’t. 

Imma continue to skip the group think and think for myself but it’s getting pretty wild out here, not gonna lie. My day one broski is getting married in Hawaii with the bachelors trip and wedding in the coming months. Vegas and then Hawaii.. I used to dream about shit like this. I’m definitely FAR from rich but I’m def not having to whip the civic around the city making deliveries, thrifting, flipping phones, taking shifts at the baba and all the other shit to make ends meet. I can use pto and fuck off with the boys in Vegas.. I think at this point, I just wanna make sure my mom and dad are good and try to nurture my relationship the best I can from my end. Seems like it won’t last.

 But I’m not tripping, life goes on, as they say. Can stress on what isn’t meant for me. It’s hard to let go though, for a multitude of reasons I haven’t pulled the trigger on quitting for good.  I’m also thankful as fuck to be alive rip to all those lose during Covid it just in a daily basis. Every day we wake up is a gift and a blessing.. I be trying to be more giving/thankful/able to show/give gratitude when I can. 

My thoughts on this are so fucking random, sometimes i wonder if I have so undiagnosed mental illness from that but then again I smoke all day everyday legit, and can get ALOT of shit done. I just got promoted at my new job and have expectations within myself to perform and reach my next promotion within 6 months. We will see if that actually happened but I feel like if I continue to get better at it everyday and always be open to learning the potential is limitless. On some super random shit crypto’s and nfts are the wave and a lot of people will get left behind.. I actually need to do more research on nfts and start making moves bc they’re here to stay!!! 

 Travis Scott concert incident was contrived and evil in every sense. Demonic music and sacrifice most def. I am boycotting his music along with Drake. That shit is disgusting. We will see when I post on here again. I still appreciate my solitude and me time. That shit becomes a thing of the past when you move in with your significant other. Has many pros but that’s like the biggest neg for me.. Feel like my wings been clipped. I also needa read more books!!! Or audio books cos a mf be lazy af when it comes to books but either way. They used to say books would be taken away but these days, for me they be drowned out by useless info on social media *sigh.. millennial generation baby

[concussed-to-pieces]

Stay Safe Part Five: Dark Past

Fandom: The Mandalorian [Star Wars]

Pairing: Eventual Mandalorian [Din Djarin]/Reader

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN: At last, broskis! We have come to what is arguably my favorite episode thus far. I hope this installment is to your satisfaction. Enjoy!

Tag List: @huliabitch @wrestlingfae @toxiicpop @helplessly-nonstop @culturalrebel @literal-fand0m-trash @sinnamon-bunn @fioccodineveautunnale @hxldmxdxwn @lizajane3 @thewaythisis @nellyneko @absurdthirst

Part One: Should Have Known Better

Part Two: Tranquil Turmoil

Part Three: Vibroblade Mettle

Part Four: Reaching Out

[!TRIGGER WARNING!: This installment contains allusions to PTSD, and vividly vague mentions of past trauma. Stay safe!]

"The worst possible thing has finally happened." You announced, thumping your head against the empty shelf. "We're all out of the nutrient paste. Y'know, the good one." You glanced over at the armored man, who was currently sorting through another one of his many crates. "This is the end. I'll have to go back to aurelac mining just to eke out a living." You continued, dramatically slumping to the floor. 

You were only half-joking, of course. The variety of food was waning, but at least there was still sustenance to be had. The real issue was credits, or the lack thereof. Nutrient paste wouldn't buy repairs.

"No. No mining. I need all my appendages." The Mandalorian mumbled, his mind clearly elsewhere. He roused himself after a moment, looking over at you. "It's not that bad, we still have some reserves." He said, gesturing vaguely at the small pile of dented cans and faded-looking tubes beside him on the deck. "I'll...I'll get in touch with someone."

"It's too late for us, my metalline companion. You must...take the child…"

"You keep these antics up and I'll sell you to the Hutts." The Mandalorian teased, reaching out to squeeze your chin playfully. "Bet they'd offer me good credits for you, what with your strong back and skills with the younglings." You could hear his smile and your heart tripped a little.

"You would sell me?!" You gasped, pretending to reel with shock. "This betrayal will not stand. Avenge me, child!" You flung a hand out towards the baby, who stared at it for several seconds wide-eyed before proceeding to gnaw gently on your index. "There, you see that? They are swearing a blood oath to free me from your cruelty."

"Uh huh." The Mandalorian didn't sound particularly convinced, his hand still cupping your chin. For whatever reason, you got the impression that he was mulling something over in his mind. Something a little heavier than your lighthearted joking with the child.

"Are you alright?" You asked softly after a minute, putting your hand over his own.  

He started at the sound of your voice, jerking his gauntlet away like your touch had burned him. You tried not to let it get to you. It might be that he just didn't like being touched; it was entirely within his right to shy away.

"I'm...yeah." He assured you, grabbing the lip of the crate to haul himself upright with a grunt. "There's just--it's complicated. I've got an idea, I don't know…" he trailed off.

"What's the problem? Talk to me, maybe I can help."

Instead of answering, the man headed up the ladder into the cockpit. You dusted your knees off and hoisted the child, clambering up the ladder one-handed in pursuit of the armored man.

The Mandalorian had apparently begun calculating new coordinates, the sextant whirring to life as he cycled through the charts. "We're going to see an old friend of mine." He announced from his position in the pilot's seat.

"Why do I feel like you don't mean an actual friend?" The armored man yet again didn't deign to answer you immediately and you groaned, setting the child down on the co-pilot seat and stretching your arms out over your head. 

"He owes me a favor."

"Mm, what kind?"

"The kind that I can get payment out of." The Mandalorian said curtly.

"You don't seem to be too excited to visit this friend of yours."

"Things have changed since the last time we worked together." His words were quiet, contemplative. "There were...a lot of jobs I did back then that I wouldn't touch now."

It hadn't occurred to you that he had fallen into bounty hunting as a cleaner occupation. What could he have been involved in that made collecting dangerous, often violent criminals for a living seem like the better career path? Maker, you wanted to ask, the curiosity burned at you. But if you had learned anything about the stoic man in the time that you had spent traveling together, it was that he only spoke when he saw fit to. 

"I want you and the kid in the bunk for the duration of these negotiations." He muttered after several minutes of silence. "These are rough people and I don't need any distractions."

He didn't mention Calican by name and you were grateful for that much. It stung a little that he still considered you a distraction after that tense standoff. Nuisance. You nodded all the same, focused on the floor plating. "I understand." 

You could say that you did, anyway.

Fake it 'til you make it, I guess.

...

You got the feeling that something may have gone a bit funny in the negotiations. The Mandalorian hadn't mentioned anything about having to use his own ship for the job.

You could hear muffled voices on the other side of the bunk's shutter, and you had departed the station ages ago. Where were you headed?

There was a sudden, hollow rattle from the outside. Beskar. He had moved quickly, for whatever reason. It was a strange comfort to know that he wasn't in the cockpit, but here in the hold keeping an eye on the individuals he was working with. Though that begged the question of who might be piloting the craft.

Something large struck the wall beside the shutter with a dull boom, the impact making you jump. What were they doing out there? You moved your eyes from the wall back down to the child, who had just rolled their ball to you yet again.

Another impact, and this time there was a loud beep! That was the lock for the retractor on the bunk hatch, which meant--

The bunk shutter slid up into the ceiling, revealing yourself and the baby sitting on the bed. You paused mid-motion, raising an imperious eyebrow at the motley crew of characters that filled the hold. 

An eternal second passed where a bald human man, a Twi'lek woman, a large Devaronian and the Mandalorian just...gawked at you.

"Sweetheart, you didn't tell me we were having guests!" You exclaimed in feigned surprise, doing your best to appear like you weren't scrambling to figure out a solution to this problem. "I would have picked the place up if I had known!"

Fake it 'til you make it, right? 

The Mandalorian stayed stock-still as you climbed out of the bunk, the child secure in your arms. "I'm so sorry about the state of the hold, everyone." You apologized profusely with a bow, "it's difficult to keep everything tidy. Little ones, you know how they are!" The hulking Devaronian who was half-in, half-out of the refresher appeared downright flummoxed when you brushed past him to stand by the Mandalorian, while the bald man across the way quickly adopted a calculating look. 

"Is this yours, Mando? Did you two make this?" He asked, grinning broadly as he got to his feet. "Look at you! Look at those ears!" He chuckled, moving in to fawn over said ears on the child. "Can I hold him?"

"I'd really rather you-" In a clean jerk of movement, he swept the baby out of your arms. "-Didn't." You finished, less scared and more irritated now. Just who did this guy think he was?!

The Twi'lek woman, who had been silent up until this point, started to giggle quietly to herself. The noise set your teeth on edge, to say nothing of the openly hostile look she was giving the Mandalorian. "I didn't take you for the type, Mando." She crooned, a small knife winding its way back and forth between her deft fingers. "Maybe that code of yours has made you soft." You knew an insult when you heard it, and you wondered what history the Mandalorian might share with her to warrant such a caustic reaction.

You could feel the tension rolling off of the Mandalorian in waves while the bald man toyed with the child. You took in the bracer of pistols he wore and your stomach twisted with nerves. The last thing you needed was more blasters near the child. "Me, I could never really get into the idea of havin' kids. Didn't have the temperament for it." The man remarked, "patience, y'know."

The baby's face scrunched up threateningly, heralding a deafening wail of distress. "Oh, quick, let me see him, he's going to pitch a fit." You said hurriedly.

No sooner had you stepped forward to take the child back (possibly by force) than an unfamiliar mechanical voice announced, "dropping out of hyperspace...now."

You barely managed to snatch the baby away from the bald man before everyone in the hold was thrown off their feet, the whole ship rolling under the strain of the abrupt change in navigation.

"Commencing final approach...now."

You stayed where you landed and clutched the child tight to your chest, ducking your head in case some of the cargo pulled loose. The ship banked hard and your body slid sideways on the floor.

"Cloaking signal...now."

Metal hit the deck on either side of you with a stereo clang!, making the child start to bawl but preventing you from sliding any further. An armored thigh plowed roughly between your legs and your eyes sprang open on reflex, sighing in relief when you were greeted with the familiar sight of the Mandalorian's visor. "Don't move." He muttered as the ship continued to pitch and sway.

You nodded, more than content to stay exactly where you were. His body caged in your own, solidly-armored form providing shelter for both you and the child. "Thank you." You breathed.

He merely shrugged in reply.

"Engaging coupling...now." The voice intoned overhead. The Crest plummeted and the Mandalorian swore under his breath, bracing himself on his forearms as his body was pushed down against your own from the force of the drop. The ship finally came to a stop with a rough shudder that made your teeth rattle in your skull. 

"Coupling confirmed. We are down. And relax. Commence extraction now."

The Mandalorian propped himself up with one arm, curling his other protectively around you and the squalling child. "Everyone alright?" He rasped after a few seconds had passed. "Status report."

"That useless droid didn't even give us a proper countdown!" The Twi'lek spat, getting shakily to her feet.

"It's a droid, Xi'an. Y' expect too much. Now, are you two gonna' be able to be friends during this or am I gonna' have to put you in time out?" The bald man inquired, gesturing between the Mandalorian and the Devaronian. "Remember Burg, Mando let us use his ship."

"Al-right Mayfeld." The large man groused, struggling to extract himself from the refresher. "But you had better shut up that baby before I make it into a snack."

Your body tensed at his threat and you heard the Mandalorian chamber a round for his flamethrower, the click deafeningly loud in the relative quiet of the hold. 

"Easy, easy. Burg, you gotta' be respectful." The bald man stressed the word, shooting you an apologetic grimace. "Flyin' makes him anxious."

"Making me anxious too." You managed to get out, using the hem of your tunic to mop some of the tears off of the kid's face. They had faded into sniffling and snorting, worn out from the scare and subsequent bumpy ride. You moved to sit up and the Mandalorian shifted back onto his haunches, one hand on your shoulder. You patted his hand and he squeezed gently before he rose to stand once more.

Mayfeld called up the ladder, "Z, are you sure they can't see us?"

"The Razor Crest is scrambling our signature, and I am inside the prison system. It's impressive that this gunship had survived the Empire without being impounded." The automated voice replied from the cockpit.

"Alright we got a job to do. Mando! You're up." The bald man ordered, gesturing at the floor port.

You saw the brief hesitation where the Mandalorian considered not obeying, but then he heaved a sigh and started rummaging around for something in one of the many crates.

"So, he never takes that thing off?" Mayfeld asked curiously as the Mandalorian crouched to work on the hatch encryption.

"Never. And I wouldn't ask him to." You replied firmly, bouncing the still-whimpering child on your hip. 

"You don't know his name or what he looks like, and you're bumpin' uglies with him?" Mayfeld's incredulous tone made you wish the ground would swallow you. "That's nuts."

"I know him. That's really what's important in a relationship, isn't it?" You posited cooly, spying the Mandalorian squaring his shoulders underneath his cloak. Whether he did it consciously or not, it was a little humorous to see someone as stoic as he was blatantly preening. "Knowing a person has always been about way more than just knowing their name or what they look like. Knowing a person is…" You paused thoughtfully, keenly aware of the daggers Xi'an was glaring at you. "Well, there's just more to it that a lot of people don't seem to understand."

"Oh you'll fit right in with their merry little band of Creed-followers." The Twi'lek woman murmured, her tone sarcastic as she enquired, "I suppose you'll be getting your helmet fitted shortly?"

"Why do you think I'm doing this job in the first place?" The Mandalorian growled. No one was caught more off-guard than you, and you barely managed to stop yourself from shooting Xi'an a smug smile. "Beskar isn't cheap." He continued, free hand reaching back to wrap carefully around your ankle. "Plus, I'd have to surrender a piece of my beskar to be smelted in with their new helmet's beskar." He tapped his scored breastplate with the crypto device, which carried on beeping. "Need a lot more wear and tear than this before I can justify that level of commitment."

It was a legitimate struggle to keep from laughing out loud at Mayfeld's continued expression of bewilderment. "You Mandalorian guys are even more ridiculous than I thought." He muttered as the crypto pinged.

The hatch slid open with a soft click, and the Mandalorian got back to his feet to coil and stow the cabled device. 

After some light bickering amongst the group, Mayfeld graciously agreed to go first. "You better hang onto this one, Mando." He joked, whacking a hand into the armored man's pauldron and then gesturing up and down at you. "Otherwise, I may just steal 'em for myself. If they're crazy enough to get freaky with you, maybe they'll settle for a guy who's a little more...normal." The smile he directed at you didn't reach his eyes, all teeth like a hungry animal.

You chose to heroically ignore his attempt at teasing you or inciting wrath in your 'partner'. "Stay safe, love." You crooned sweetly, deliberately attempting to be as saccharine as possible while you perched up on your tiptoes to touch your forehead to the Mandalorian's helm.

His hand found your own, fingers twining clumsily together. "You too," he hesitated before gruffly mumbling, "love." 

Xi'an followed after Mayfeld (making a gagging noise at the Mandalorian as she went), and then Burg dropped like a brick into the ship below. That was the last of his team departed through the hatch and yet he still stood there, just staring down at you.

"Was that too mu-" you began to whisper, only to have him cut you off by shoving you bodily against the wall. You started to stammer out another apology but ended up falling silent when he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close. One large hand cradled the back of your neck while the other gripped your tunic at the small of your back, and he leaned down to touch his helm to the top of the child's head.

The embrace reeked of a strangely-poignant possessiveness that had your heart aching, causing you to almost mourn the loss of him when his hold loosened. "I'm so damn sorry." He muttered, releasing you fully and turning towards the hatch.

You caught his hand before he could leave. "H-Hey, I meant what I said." You mumbled, half-hoping he didn't hear you. His head jerked to the side to look at you and your confidence waned considerably under his expressionless gaze, making you drop your eyes to the floor. "Y'know, um, stay safe." You chickened out. Really, how could you have thought you would get away with telling him something like that? Seconds before he headed off to do something he had clear reservations about doing?

He was still for several seconds before he shook his head and swung himself down to the ladder. "Stay in the bunk." He instructed, and then he too was gone.

…

Time passed at a slow crawl while you were sequestered in the bunk space. You did your best to keep the child occupied and quiet, astonishing them via a cat's cradle made from your boot laces.

You thanked the stars again and again that the kid hadn't been hurt when the ship landed, your hip still aching from how rough it had been for you. At the same time you staunchly avoided musing on the Mandalorian's body over your own, how quickly he had moved to protect you. It didn't bear thinking about. Just like his embrace before he had left, solid beskar molding to the curves of your body. 

Didn't mean anything. He was making certain the child was safe. If you were safe as well, it was strictly by proxy.

You shook your head at your silly thoughts, then stopped abruptly when you heard footsteps above you. You hushed the baby, moving them a little further back in the bunk as those footsteps shifted to impacts on the metal ladder. 

Stay in the bunk. The Mandalorian's words echoed in your ears and you swallowed hard. Stay in the bunk, but what if someone comes for me while you're gone? What then?

You heard someone fumbling with the keypad and you held your breath, hoping against hope that whoever was on the other side of the door wouldn't be able to figure out the combination. Please, please, just this once. But despite your fervent prayers, you saw the shutter begin to rise for the second time that day.

It was a compound-eyed droid. The aforementioned Z, if you had to guess. They stood in front of you, head cocked slightly to the side as if to study you. "Curious." They mused flatly. Then, they raised their rifle. 

Frantically, you scrambled for a plan. You weren't fast enough to outmaneuver a droid in a shootout. You didn't even have a blaster! Your knife was still strapped to your leg, precious little good it did you there. 

Cold reality dawned on you, that this...this could be it. The baby whined warily and you shifted your body, bracing your arm on the wall and doing your best to be a human shield for the child. "It'll be alright, sweetheart." You whispered to them, swallowing your panic to reassure them as best as you could. "I won't let them hurt you."

You heard a whir of servos and you squeezed your eyes shut in anticipation, unable to keep from cringing at the harsh report of the rifle. It sounded even louder in the cramped space. You waited for the pain, even though you had felt no blaster bolt impact. You assumed you were already in shock, ears ringing with the echoes of the gun.

Instead, a leather-gloved hand seized your arm, dragging you and the child out of the bunk space. You covered the baby's head, tucking them into the crook of your arm in an effort to protect them from the next attack. "No!" You cried, trying to struggle out of the person's grip so you could grab your knife. "No! Let me go, or I'll-!" 

Metal met your shoulder and you heard a ragged exhale of, "shit." At the familiar sound of that modulated voice, you dared to open your eyes. 

The droid was on the floor, a hole blown in its headgear. Most of your field of vision was taken up by a large form clad in beskar, whose forehead was resting on your shoulder. 

"Oh." You said softly, concerned when you felt him sag against you. His other forearm hit the wall above your head, taking some of his not-insubstantial weight off of you.

There was a wound between his breastplate and pauldron, still slowly trickling blood onto his flight suit. "I don't have much time." He said hoarsely. "Have to get that Twi' back so I get paid. Qin."

"Tell me what you need from me." Bold offer, when your legs still felt like gelatin. The fingers of your free hand grappled the sleeve of his flight suit, holding it tightly. Maker, you had thought you were dead. 

Relief and dread rushed through you in equal parts when he said, "Qin's out cold for the time being. Need you to stay in the bunk until I come get you." He hesitated, swallowing hard. "Please."

"When this is all over, I'm not going anywhere near that bunk ever again." You threatened weakly.

"That's fine." He nodded against your shoulder. "Just a little while longer. Qin is getting me triple from Ran."

"We'll see about that." You huffed. He straightened up, then leaned in to press his helmet to your forehead. You closed your eyes, not able to handle being studied at that moment. "I-I thought it was going to kill the-"

"I know." The Mandalorian breathed. "I'm sorry."

"I was so scared." You admitted, your voice cracking. The hold you had on his suit tightened even further. "M' sorry, you're the one who's hurt but I can't seem to get myself together." You shook your head with a sad little laugh, moving to pull away. 

The armored man kept you where you were though, his hands framing your shoulders. "I promise. We'll be safe once I deliver that Twi' to Ran, at least for a little while." He drew his thumb down the center of his breastplate, then tapped the chin of his helm with two fingers. "Promise."

"I'll hold you to it." His helmet hung mere inches from your face, and you stood on your tiptoes to press your forehead to his once more. "Do what you need to do. We'll be here." You promised, mustering up a smile. "Stay safe."

His hand wrapped around your wrist, squeezing for a second. "Wait for me. This won't take long."

…

In spite of your trepidation you ended up dozing off with the words to the lullaby on your lips, thoroughly worn out from your trying day. The child was glued to your side, snoring quietly even as you drifted in and out of consciousness. 

Thinking back, all you could recall was hearing the ramp hiss open, the hollow echo of voices in a large hangar space. After that, just the smooth hum of hyperspace travel.

When the Mandalorian finally came to retrieve you, even the unflappably stoic bounty hunter seemed like he had gone through the wringer. His steps were unsure, and he clung to a cargo net despite the level deck. "Need your help." He said thickly once you had swung your legs out of the bunk space. 

Instantly awake at those words, you left the child to nap peacefully and followed the armored man back up the ladder to the cockpit. There, he all but fell into the pilot seat. 

"Something's wrong." He muttered. "It's just a cut, but something…" He trailed off, shaking himself after a moment. "Can't focus."

"What do you need me to do?" You asked.

"Hands aren't steady. Need...need to get the beskar off. Peel the suit. Fix the damage." He sounded breathless, like he was rushing to force the words out. 

"You have to walk me through this, okay? I won't touch anywhere you don't want me to touch, but I need your help." 

"Just-" He cut himself off with a low groan. "Gods, my head. That rancor-sized bastard broke every knob in that stupid control room off with my helmet."

"Hey." You murmured, placing a careful hand on top of his own. "Stay with me."

"Right. Important." His helmet rolled back for a moment. "Dammit, come on." He snapped in frustration, shaking his head. Fumbling fingers unlatched his beskar breastplate, the metal clicking softly as he pulled it from its gription mount. 

Next came the mount straps for his pauldrons, and here was where he really needed some help. The latches were worn to a smooth bronze patina, sliding out from beneath his shaky hands again and again. You carefully placed your fingers around his own, guiding him through undoing the simple fasteners before you tugged his pauldrons free. The harness slowly flopped forward, then landed on the floor with a muffled clunk. 

He exhaled hard and started dragging at the upper zippers of his flight suit, quickly getting them caught for his trouble. "Sweetheart, hang on." The endearment slipped out automatically, your mind already focused on this next insurmountable task. "Let me do this for you, okay?"

He lolled his head against his shoulder silently, dropping his hands to rest on his thighs. You stepped closer in between his legs and then slowly worked free the jam he had created for himself.

One of the Mandalorian's hands suddenly flew up, grabbing your sleeve. "Didn't kill anyone." He slurred, almost panicky. "I swear. It was all droids, and the one guy...Xi'an killed him, not me, I t-tried to talk him down, and Xi'an..." 

"I believe you." You assured him, gently patting his hand. "It's over now, okay?"

"Xi'an killed him, I just…" He trailed off, his head falling forward to rest on his chest. He might have been watching you fight with the zipper. "Told Mayfeld to ask about Alzoc Three, that bitch." He muttered, "like it was a joke. Like it was a joke. Alzoc Three was a nightmare, Ran almost died, I couldn't get the klesir...the smell…" He actually retched, "Burning, and I did what I had to but…they all had so many eyes, and it was so dark--"

"Whoa, hey. What are you even talking about?" You interrupted him, more than a little concerned. It wasn't like him to rattle off on such a wild tangent, frantic.

"Mines, we were sent into the mines blind. They didn't tell us about the T-Talz." He rambled on like you hadn't said anything, gesturing with one hand. "Dark. Cold. Talz, enslaved, mining...their whole lives, dying in those pits and it reeked like hatred." 

Your hands went still on his zipper when his voice cracked. He sounded seconds from weeping, his next words punching indelicate through the modulator.

"Imps shove the young ones into the pits. Say their fur will cushion the fall. I landed in a pile of bodies." He breathed. "So many little ones. Tiny, tiny...tiny bodies, and the klesir, the death-rot, I-I--"

You abandoned the fight with his zipper to shift forward, mindful of his wound as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. His helmet dug into your collarbone and you laid your cheek on top of it, feeling his shoulders tremble slightly. "You're not there anymore." You whispered, cradling the back of his helmet like you did for the child's head.

"It's s-so dark…" He mumbled brokenly into your tunic. "Came at me with a rock crusher and I couldn't--I couldn't...oh gods..."

"Shh, sweetheart." You shifted your hand lower, resting your fingers tentatively against the exposed skin on the back of his neck. He felt fever-hot, the area clammy and damp with sweat. "It's alright now. You're here with me. Breathe, okay? Just keep your face there and focus on breathing. We'll get through this together."

"Did that bitch poison me?" The Mandalorian half-sobbed, grasping desperately at your arms. "I can't keep my eyes open. Can't...can't keep them open...g-gods, it's so dark…"

"Love, look at me." You coaxed him, holding the sides of his helmet steady. "You're on your ship. The child is safe. You're safe."

"Are you sure?" He asked, the uncertainty in his voice breaking your heart. 

Fake it 'til you make it.

"I promise." 

"The kid-"

"They're asleep in the bunk right now. Do you want me to get them?"

"No, no." He waved the suggestion off, nearly hitting you with the haphazard motion. "S'okay. I believe you." His hands dropped to rest on your tunic over your hips, fingers clenching tight in the fabric as if he was trying to ground himself with your presence.

With a little creative positioning and more than a few swears, you managed to get the flight suit peeled down to his elbows without dislodging his helmet. The liner shirt you resorted to shoving up until it was out of the way, finally getting a good look at the damage. 

He was littered in bruises. The angry contusion from that sniper bolt had mercifully faded, but in its place bloomed a veritable forest of new, smaller marks. Rounding out all these fresh acquisitions was the stab wound. It wasn't particularly large, though it sank deep into the tissue that connected his shoulder to his chest. If it didn't heal properly, it might impede his movement. 

A strange, bluish residue darkened the dried blood at the edges of the wound. Your eyes narrowed. "Do you have an anti-tox kit? There's some crud here I don't like the look of."

"Blue?" When you nodded he reached for his belt, finally tugging free a small vial from a side loop. "Bathe area with half." He instructed, his breathing ragged again. The minute effort had clearly worn him out, which was incredibly worrisome. 

You nodded, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly. "I need you to lie down, okay? Otherwise this will just run off." 

The bleary Mandalorian gamely left the chair and dropped onto the floor, his normally-smooth motions reduced to something resembling clumsy puppeteering. You rummaged through the rear compartments for one of your clean rags and a bacta patch. This was no simple mark from a gaudy belt buckle, after all.

"I can't b-believe she poisoned me." He remarked faintly, sounding indignant. "What the hell did I ever do t' her?"

"Maybe you were just too devastatingly handsome. She couldn't take it when you left." You suggested dryly, carefully tipping half of the vial's neon purple contents onto the open wound. 

The Mandalorian hissed out a pained laugh, his whole body tensing briefly before relaxing again. "Shit, that mus' be it." He slurred. "Crazy Twi' was always stabbin' me. Wanted t' get m...me outta' th' beskar." He brushed his knuckles against your cheek. "Not like you. Y' always tellin' me t...to...to stay safe. Like you'd be sad 'f I got hurt." 

You longed for a beskar steel helmet at that moment, mentally cursing your cheeks for flushing as hot as they did. This wasn't the time! He was still soaked with sweat, his shoulder jumping erratically under your touch. It was difficult not to notice the way his chest was heaving, the rise and fall of battered olive skin almost hypnotic. This was only the second time you had seen him in such a state of undress and, despite how terrible the current situation was, you still treasured this display of the trust that he placed in you. Just to ask for your help in general-! "Of course I'd be sad." You said quietly, trying to focus on smoothing the patch over the edges of the wound.

His thumb traced your jawline. "Really?" He asked, sounding somewhere between incredulous and seconds from passing out. "S'nice. You're nice. Nice t' look at, too. Mesh'la. Xi'an was jealous." He mumbled. You could hear his smile; he was gloating, the smug bastard. Leave it to a man who had been poisoned to gloat about an old flame being petty! "Jeal-o-us…" He tapped your nose, and then his hand flopped to the floor.

You had to sit back on your haunches, exhaling hard once you heard his breathing even out. This day was just getting stranger and stranger! Nice to look at, he had said. Xi'an was jealous. Maker, were you still blushing?! 

You shook your head, for once not bothering to fight back your fond smile. "She sure was, wasn't she." You whispered sadly, daring to caress the side of his helmet.

You didn't want to leave him alone while he 'sweat out' the poison in case something went wrong, so you chose to curl up in the secondary co-pilot chair and keep him under observation. After several minutes, a hand fumbled up to grab your own. "H-ey." He breathed. "St…Stay here. Don' leave, okay?" 

"I'm right here with you. I'm not going anywhere." You assured him, gently rubbing your thumb over his knuckles.

"Can you...sing me th...that song. The one--the one...th' one the kid likes?" He turned his head slowly to look up at you, the side of his helm hitting the floor with a solid thud. "Keeps the dark...keeps th' dark outta' my helmet."

"Yeah, absolutely. Whatever you need." He squeezed your hand, which you assumed was his way of saying thank you. You then slid off of the seat and back onto the floor, carefully lifting his head so you could lay it in your lap. 

He groaned at the motion and you apologized softly, stroking your fingers down the front of his helm like you did for the kid. You got a quiet sigh out of that. His hand shifted over to pet your thigh, and you felt his shoulders relax ever so slightly.

"Sweet dreams 'til sunbeams find you, sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you…" you sang, deliberately keeping your volume as low as you could manage.

The Mandalorian hummed along with the tune off-key and the sound made your fond smile return, despite your best efforts.

"But in your dreams, whatever they be, dream a little dream of me…" 

…

You were uncertain of when you had fallen asleep, only knowing that your own dreams were far from restful. Fraught with images of dark pits and frenzied clawing through the void, the muted horror of an undefinable stench clinging to your body as you searched for him...

"My f-f-friend, if you are receiving this..." 

The staticky voice startled you from your nightmares and you gazed blearily up at the Mandalorian's back. Somehow you had ended up back in the co-pilot chair. When…?

He appeared to be listening to a message, his form hunched over slightly so you couldn't see the individual's holo on the control panel. "...means you are alive. You may be surprised to hear this, but I am alive too. I guess we can call it even." 

Your brow furrowed as the Mandalorian scoffed, shaking his head.

"...lot has happened since we last saw each other. The man who hired you is still here, and his ranks of ex-Imperial guards have grown."

Ex-Imperial? You were wide awake now. You tucked your legs beneath the blanket covering you, huddling yourself up tight before you realized that it was actually his cape. He must have draped it over you after he woke up from his post-poison fainting spell.

The message rattled on, "They have imposed despotic rule over my city, which has impeded the livelihood of the Guild. We consider him an enemy but we cannot get close enough to take him out."

"Osi'kyr." The Mandalorian hissed through his teeth, scooping his gription harness up off the floor and settling it back on his shoulders. "Of course not, of course." The grit in his words was unfamiliar, violent. You remembered what he had said about not touching certain jobs anymore; frantic, guilty rambling about Alzoc Three, dark pits. What else had he done before bounty hunting?

"If you would consider one last commission, I would very much make it worth your while. You have been successful so far in staving off their hunters, but they will not stop until they have their prize." His shoulders snapped tight. "So here is my proposition: return to Nevarro. Bring the child as bait. I will arrange an exchange and provide loyal Guild members for protection. Once we get near the client, you kill him, and we both get what we want."

The Mandalorian was shaking his head again, knuckles rhythmically striking the edge of the control panel. He was angry. His presence seemed to fill the cockpit, robbing the space of everything except the silent fury he radiated. Like when he had been staring down Calican, the mudhorn about to charge.

"If you succeed, you keep the child and I will have your name cleared with the Guild. For a man of honor should not be forced to live in exile." Weirdly, the Mandalorian went dead still at that. The wording obviously had some kind of heavy impact on him. "I await your arrival with optimism."

"I'll bet you fucking do, you-" The Mandalorian seethed, reaching for his breastplate and then pausing when he saw you were awake. He continued the motion after a moment, clearing his throat. "We're headed back to Sorgan." He enunciated calmly, affixing the plate to his harness.

"Why?" You inquired, a little wary. Gone was the slur in his voice, the clumsy movements he had displayed only a few hours back. Also gone was his rage. He was somehow even more closed off than before, his body language bordering on unreadable.

"I'm going to need backup."

Part Six

[sodalitefully]

Serpentine [GNR Slaxl AU]

((just a silly pre-slash slaxl fic, not as dirty as the premise might suggest.  posted in time for valentine’s day! but actually not all that romantic lol.  hope you enjoy 😊))

📞📞📞📞

Axl will admit, there are times when he can’t stand his job. 

When he has to talk to creeps who wouldn’t know sexy if it slapped them in the ass… When frequent callers get attached and won’t stop pestering him to meet in person… When asshole teenagers try to fucking prank call him… 

But there are other times that make Axl feel like working as an operator for a phone sex line isn’t a bad gig at all. Now, for example: 

He’s talking to a customer who introduced himself as Slash (plenty of his callers prefer to give an alias, but none as unique as “Slash" – Axl was intrigued from the start) and described himself as “21, lots of curly hair, nice lips, and into absolutely everything.”  Slash is pleasantly soft-spoken, and he knows how to use that sweet, boyish voice to utter positively filthy things into the receiver.  Trust him, Axl knows filthy, and Slash is one of the rare customers that Axl doesn’t even have to act for – his gasps and moans are as real as the hard-on he’s been sporting since Slash told him all about what he wanted to do to Axl with his mouth.   

About ten minutes in, Slash starts to sound a little distracted and Axl knows that’s his cue to stop teasing and start bringing things, well, to a climax.  “Slash, are you touching yourself? Are you imagining that it’s my hand stroking you off?" 

There’s a beat, then a quiet huff of a laugh.  “No, not yet… Uh, actually, I can’t.” 

He can’t? Well, what’s Axl supposed to do with that? Hm… 

“Slash, are you talking to me in public?” Axl purrs into the phone.  “And here I thought you couldn’t get any dirtier…" 

Another short laugh, muffled like Slash ducked his head away from the phone.  What the hell is so funny? Suddenly Slash isn’t cooperating with him and Axl’s getting just a bit frustrated… Even if Slash does have a nice laugh.   

“No, I’m just in my living room.  I have been told I’m pretty dirty, though.”  Axl can hear his smirk. 

“Well then, why can’t you take your cock out?  Don’t be shy, I want to hear you when you touch yourself.  Fuck, has anyone ever told you how sexy it is when you moan like that?" 

“Believe me, I want to, I’m so fucking hard for you Axl… The thing is – and I’m not making a joke, I swear!” Slash’s voice is apologetic, but also faintly amused.  "– The thing is, I have a snake in my lap right now.” 

“… Baby, I don’t understand.” 

“A snake,” Slash repeats, like Axl is five.  “A Burmese python.  I’m sitting on my couch and she slithered over a minute ago, while we were talking about your nipple piercing? And now she keeps trying to stick her head in my hair… Say hello, Pandora.” 

Axl can only imagine that Slash just held the snake’s head up to the receiver. 

“Oh my God.” 

Never before has Axl lost his customer so quickly and so completely.  Sure, sometimes people chickened out halfway through, or even called just for someone to talk to, but one minute Axl had Slash completely in the palm of his hand, and now he's cooing over his pet snake?  An actual, literal, snake?? 

This situation is not covered in the scripts. 

“Sweetheart, why don’t you just move the snake for a moment so we can keep going?” Axl cajoles with as much patience as he could muster. 

“But she looks so comfortable…” Slash whines playfully. 

That startles a laugh out of Axl.  Slash just sounds too sweet… Axl has never though of a snake as cute before, but the image of Slash with his pet in his lap is just ridiculously adorable.   

“Nah, but seriously though, I would except there’s an issue with her tank right now.  Heat lamp broke, and my living room window is the only one that gets sunlight.  I guess she warmed up enough and wanted to come say hi." 

“So then…” 

“I guess we can’t finish this.” Axl is a little surprised to find that he feels just as disappointed as Slash sounds.  “Damn.  Some of the best phone sex I’ve ever had and I get cockblocked by a snake, fuckin’ figures.” 

“You know what, in that case…” Axl knows he’s about to take a stupid risk, but Slash seems like a good guy, you can trust people who care about animals, right? And it’s been forever since Axl’s had a really good orgasm, so can you really blame him? It may be unprofessional but in this case… it’s worth a shot.  “How about I give you my personal number, and you can call me sometime when you have a little more privacy so we can pick up where we left off?” 

“Wait, are you serious? Yes, holy shit.” 

Axl confirms and rattles off his number. 

“Sweet. You’re not messing with me, are you Axl? This is actually your number?” 

“Yeah, and if you make me regret giving it to you I swear to God I’ll hunt you down and chop off your dick.”  Axl is dead serious but Slash just laughs; Axl’s threats are obviously not enough to dampen his mood. 

“No bullshit, I swear.  Can I call you tomorrow night?”   

“You better, you owe me for these blue balls!" 

“Don’t worry, I know just how I’m going to make it up to you, Axl,” Slash drops back into his phone sex voice quick enough to give Axl whiplash.   

“Yeah, well… I guess we’ll see about that tomorrow, won’t we?"

🐍🐍🐍🐍

((uh, I don’t plan to write a part 2, I just don’t know how to end a fic properly 😅

thanks for reading, happy valentine’s!

lmk if you want to be added to the tag list: @fan-with-issues, @broski-is-a-witch​, @viralwolf02, @arnold-layne​, @insipidrhyme​, @jjisnotinteresting​, @catsandacoffee​, @stradlin-cold-heartbreaker, @slashscowboyboots​))

[collateralfiction]

OBJ Short

DREW

“Aye, three stacks, where you at, my love?”

With a little help from my coconut and avocado oil concoction, I carefully combed through my tresses and slicked my hair into a low ponytail at the back of my head. I was growing frustrated with having my natural hair out for so long that I was honestly contemplating siting through 5 hours of faux locs. And God knows I have zero patience to sit for an extended period of time, let alone have someone in my head at that. With Air Pods sticking in my ears, I could barely hear my best friend yelling at me from downstairs. Sliding back into my fluffy slippers, I stepped out of my room, looked over the staircase and down at her with a cheesy smile.

“Well don’t you look amazing. Jimmy Choo?”

“Absolutely and why are you not ready?” she sassed, placing her hand on her hips.

“Girl, it’s only All-Star weekend. This is not the Met Gala and the only reason I’m going is because you asked me to go. If I had my way, I would rather sit home and not get classified with a bunch of thirsty women trying to trap someone else’s man. Been through that and I’m past that,”

“I know how you feel about it, mama. But honestly, we’re just going for a good time and to network like usual. Stop acting ugly,” Kory laughed.

“You know I would rather stay in and catch up on The Walking Dead but fine. My outfit is already picked out too. I just need to throw it on. Being natural is so time consuming,” I complained as I watched her take her time up my spiral staircase.

“But it seems like you had more than enough time to do that face of yours,” she laughed, hugging me tightly. It was always Drew and Kory or Kory and Drew. If you see one, you would see either one of us not too far behind. That’s just how it went. I would say I was a social butterfly but when I find people I click with, I tend to stick with them and have reservations on wanting to make new friends.

“Oh girl, you know I love a good beat. I didn’t do anything too crazy. Just foundation, highlight, eyebrows, eyelash and lips,”

“So again, a full beat,” she laughed, pushing me into the bedroom.

“Oh, bitch. Call us an Uber or something,” I said as I dropped my robe and quickly ran into my walk-in closet to pick up the outfit of the day. Since it was only a simple basketball game that would be filled with multiple press outlets, celebrities and spectators, I still had to look my best. I wore a bright two-piece neon green sweater skirt set, and paired it with my favorite Versace sandals- if you must know the name, they’re called the Triple Strap Platform High-Heel Sandals. The heels in itself is perfect for me because with my little above average height and toned legs, it’ll just bring out even further my Goddess like features. Not to bring all the attention on me, I grabbed one of my favorite fringed black jean jackets to seal in the look. I normally carried a bag with me, but I figure a Fendi fanny pack to sling across my body would be so much easier.

“No Uber. We got car service and it’s downstairs waiting,” she said as she leaned against the doorway. “Woah, mama. You look damn hot. You’re sure to get someone’s attention tonight. Use the Burberry Her scent. It’s so refreshing,” she suggested.

“Thank you, babe. I’m pretty much done. We can go before I find something else I need to do,” I smiled.

“Wait, we have got to take some photos first. Because you know after this, we’re going to the afterparty,” she expressed, walking into the connected bathroom. When I moved into this house almost five years ago, everything that I had in here was crafted to what I wanted specifically. Everything had to be of my standards and whether that was me ripping everything out and starting from the ground up, so be it. My bathroom had one of the largest mirrors in the house, spanning from the floor to the ceiling as soon as you walked in. That’s where most of my photos were taken as people have noticed a certain pattern on Instagram.

“Smile, bitch,” Kory said, immediately smizing like the professional model she is.

I turned to the side to show the profile of my body and the shoes, smiling seductively in the picture. We took turns taking solo pictures of one another until we both sought out at least three good pictures we both could put on IG. Soon after, we both dashed out of the house and into the waiting car.

The ride to the Staples Center was nothing short of traffic and corny jokes shared between Kory and I. We couldn’t help but laugh at all the Instagram models suddenly making an appearance at a sports’ filled event. I could understand if they were going to support their love ones or something else in between. But to just be here for clout and attention is lame. At least pretend like you keep up with the festivities.

As we entered the world-renowned arena, we were escorted promptly to our seats to make it in time for the National Anthem. But Kory and I couldn’t help but say hi to many of the familiar faces we passed. I preferred to be seated in the skybox up top, but this was the All-Star game. It was only right that we sit courtside and by Gabrielle Union, DJ Khaled and Ludacris. Kory had someone grab us some refreshments while we settled in comfortably and I couldn’t help but to take out my phone and do a photo-op with Mrs. Wade. The arena begun to darken with the announcement of the National Anthem beginning. As much shit this country has put people of color through, I didn’t feel the need to stand. But if the players were going to stand tall and hold their head’s high, that was the least I could do. So, we stood and laughed.

Fergie was chosen to sing the National Anthem. Aside from being a part of the Black Eyed Peas, and a few hits of her own, I wasn’t the first one to be eager to put her music on. But hey, this meant more publicity to her and probably a great marketing tool. I didn’t understand the need to change up the format of the song, but Fergie’s slow and jazzy rendition missed the target. “What in the world?” I muttered, stifling back laughter. Kory’s snickers and slick comments had me and Gabby ready to throw the towel in and walk out of the arena. After taking a look at Draymond’s face, I knew from that moment on I could no longer hold it in. It even progressively grew worse when she yelled “Let’s play some basketball!”

The chatter continued around Fergie’s interesting remix of a song before the game begun to really start. I was actually happy that Kory convinced me to come out tonight because it made me realize how lax and chill the All Star games are when they’re competing in the name of charity and having fun. By the time halftime came around, Team Stephen was ahead by two points and it was still a close game. Pharell, N.E.R.D and Migos led the halftime show performance which gave me enough opportunity to get up and walk around. Kevin Hart and Drake were on the opposite sides of the court and I made it my business to harass the two men who call themselves my big brothers before making a quick beeline to the bathroom.

“Ass check,” Kory said. I laughed as I turned around so she could take a look. The things she would say would be so out of pocket and random, but I swear she’s the only person I know who could get away with it. “Great so when Mr. Blonde Curls comes over here for a sneak peek, everything will look proper,” she smiled.

“Who?” I questioned, sliding my glasses atop my head.

“Odell Beckham Jr. He is so damn fine. But I know he doesn’t like black girls but the way he’s looking at you, would make me eat my words all over again,”

“Girl, you just said a mouthful that will have to be addressed later,” I said, shaking my head as I turned my head to follow the direction of her eyes before our eyes both locked together and my words got caught in my throat. It was him. I quickly turned around and grabbed her hand to move her back to our seats. “I think he was looking at someone else. Come on, let’s go sit before it starts back up again,” Out of curiosity, I turned my head around to see if he was still staring at me and to my surprise he was.

I hadn’t seen this man since LSU days, how does he still recognize me?

ODELL

“They ain’t never gone invite my black ass up here; we cutting up way too much,” Ben laughed, taking another sip of the Henny and coke mix. You couldn’t really take Ben anywhere but what would be a party without Ben? It was impossible. He was needed whether you liked him or not. I couldn’t miss the 2018 All Star Basketball game even if I wanted to. The stars were aligned for me to attend. I was in L.A. to see my pops and brother, have a few meetings lined up with Nike and hey, the All Star weekend just happened to fall in my lap. Right time and place. I couldn’t pass up on the opportunity. And, I had my right hand man Ben. Perfect. “You’re making fun of the back of this nigga head. He finna spin that camera on your ass and show them what they don’t really want to see,” he said as he continued to blabber on and on.

“Don’t be upset because Dave Chapelle ain’t laugh at your corny ass joke,” I snickered. “Or the fact that the bets these kids have been making thus far, you’re losing in all of them. That’s crazy, broskie,” I said.

“You know what? That just sounds like words from a true hater. My new mixtape gone have you as the very first athlete that gets dissed, can’t wait,”

“Don’t matter to me long as I can still dress,” I said, shoving his arm. He was always trying to come for my dome and by now, I was used to all of his antics.

“Ain’t no one worried about you and that damn Supreme satchel my nigga sold you on,” he said, kissing his teeth.

“Man, I’m tired of this. Keep my seat warm,” I said as I stretched a little and grabbed my empty cup of beer. The arena had plenty of employees but not for a tiny second would any of them leave our section alone just to make sure we were satisfied and had everything we needed. I’m sure they were excited to see big stars and this is probably not the first time, but I would get tired quick waiting hand and feet on us celebrities. Absolutely not.

The halftime show was underway which put everyone else’s attention on the performer, my eyes were locked on someone else. She passed me on the way to her seat and I couldn’t place a name to the face, but I knew her. Her laugh was the same as I remembered it; so vivid. But where did I know her from? I had to distract myself with things around me or else I’d be staring at her the whole time, trying to figure it out. And knowing Ben so well, he’d pick up the pieces. I was tempted to walk over there and say something but how do you introduce yourself to a stranger without it being strange? You don’t. I posed for a few photo-ops before finding myself a bathroom, grabbing some snacks and making my way back out just in time for the start of the third quarter.

I wasn’t too interested in the game after my mind was warped with trying to figure out how did I know her. After another hour and a half of the game, team Lebron came out with the win. It was a close game and it was no brainer that Lebron James was walking away with the MVP award and title for the night. He scored 29 points, had 10 rebounds and 8 assists. Tell me he wasn’t dedicated.

The floor was mixed with a bunch of people; reporters, players, celebrities, you name it. I lost her in the crowd of people, and it wasn’t helping that Ben was trying to build the courage to talk to Beyoncé, knowing damn well he was the last thing on her mind. “Yo, bro, we finna head over to the afterparty,” I wasn’t too interested in going out myself but after convincing myself that a night out wouldn’t do me any harm, I agreed to go. Besides that, I couldn’t let my boy have all the fun.

___

She was there again.

Cabaret was a popular club in New York and had recently opened up a spot in Los Angeles. It had only been opened for a month thus far but the way the lines were wrapped around the block, and the fact that the club itself was at its capacity just showed you how well thought out and lucrative it is to open a club of this magnitude. I nodded my head to the beat of the music as I followed behind the security team to Snoop’s VIP area. All I saw were girls, girls and more girls, big ass bottles of champagne and a thick cloud of smoke. But sitting behind in the corner was the same woman I saw earlier at the game, with her friend I’m assuming, talking to Lonzo Ball. What are the odds? Everyone must know everyone in Hollywood.

“What are you staring at so damn hard?” Ben asked, after grabbing a glass of champagne from one of the waitresses and handing it to me.

“Her,” I mumbled. “She looks familiar, but I don’t know where from,”

“You fucked her?” he said, stepping in front of my view.

“I gotta fuck everyone to say they look familiar?” I questioned, crossing my arms over my chest.

“You fucked-“

“Okay, happenstance which doesn’t really count. Move outta my way real quick,” I said.

“Aye, you want me to help? I could be the wingman, ice breaker, whatever your stiff ass needs,” he chuckled, throwing his hands up. I chuckled, shaking my head as I passed him by and went towards the direction of the lady in question. I stopped midway when I realized I didn’t really have a game plan and the fact that she was surrounded by people only really meant that this wasn’t the moment to approach her. Let me fall back.

“Beckham! Brody, what’s happening, boy? I haven’t seen you in weeks,” I turned around and smiled, bringing Drake into a brotherly hug. Out of all those that put on a show in this industry, Drake was really a stand-up dude and even a few months back, I was crashing at his place till I was well adjusted. I could never repay him for that.

“Ah man, Champagne Papi, what it do, man? I’m out here with Ben crazy ass, just getting in some fun in the sun,”

“Or stirring up some trouble. Aye, listen. I’m about to head on out but I’m having a little get together at my crib in Calabasas. Come through, I’ll send you the details,” he said as he patted my shoulder. “Bring Ben too. He’s good times.”

“This nigga finna be hype as shit. Will do, brody,” I said, giving him one last dap before I parted ways and greeted Snoop. I wasn’t that big of a drinker to begin with, but no one would know it by how hype and energize I was by just music alone. It was sort of like a painkiller for me. Just the beat alone could put me in a great mood no matter what the situation was. The club itself didn’t look like it dying down anytime soon and maybe an hour or two into the party, I had lost Ben in the crowd of people. With a dead cellphone and cloud of smoke hanging around me, there was no way possible I would be able to locate him. So, I sat on the couch, hoping he would notice his friend with the blonde curls wasn’t dancing any longer.

“I’ll be right back, Kory. I promise. I just need to get some fresh air,”

“Drew, I am not letting you leave by yourself. I’ll come,” My ears perked up at that revelation as I turned my head to the left to listen. They were there the whole night and in their own zone with conversation. We locked eyes a couple of times, but they were quickly cut short by either her friend, Kory, blocking my view or some random girl trying her best to persuade and talk to me.

Her name is Drew.

Drew Jordan.

DJ.

We went to Louisiana State University together.

That’s exactly how I knew her; a short flame that quickly fizzled as soon as I made it pro. I got up and grabbed my bottle of water and followed behind her slowly, watching her every movement. She still looked the same as before and I just didn’t know how I could forget a face like hers or a smile as radiating as hers could be. All of a sudden it felt like reality was sinking in. “Drew?” I called out as soon as I stepped outside. She stood off to the side drinking from a bottle of Sprite. I had watched her for five minutes before deciding to call her name. She turned around slowly and her eyes widened upon seeing me. “I probably caught you off guard, I ain’t mean to do that… I just been staring at you since the game and… I probably sound like a straight up creep,” I laughed, walking towards her. “Do you remember me?”

“Doesn’t matter if I remember you, everyone knows you,” she smirked. “But, how could I forget? How are you, Odell?”

“I’m doing great.. I can’t complain. I love how you say my name like we don’t got history, girl,” I teased, taking a step closer towards her.

She chuckled slightly and twisted the cap back onto her soda bottle and looked at me. “Well, if I do say so myself, I do recall once upon a time someone denying my phone calls so…” she trailed off.

“That wasn’t intentional, baby. I mean- Drew,” I said, tucking my bottom lip into my mouth to prevent me from saying anything else but I think it only had the opposite effect as the words already came out of my mouth.

“Calm down, Odell. It’s an Orleans thing, I get it,” she laughed. “I also understand that your career took off so damn quick, so I’m not surprised we lost touch. It happens in life,” she shrugged. I could tell she was cold by the way she tried to grip her jacket closer. It was corny but I was thinking I should offer up my jacket for an added layer of heat.

“Do you want my jacket? I think trying to look cute caught up to yo stubborn ass,” I teased, already shrugging my jacket off and placing it around her shoulders.

“Now you know I have a jacket of my own and now you’re going to get sick,” She said.

“That’s fine, that just means you gotta come to the crib and take care of me,” I winked.

“You haven’t changed at all,” she snickered. “I’m sure your girlfriend wouldn’t be too thrilled to see another woman’s face all in her man’s space,”

“Most likely not but you’re not just another woman. You’re a pretty woman that I got history with and I don’t have a girlfriend so it works out even better,” I smiled.

“Oooh, lucky me. Maybe I’ll finally get a text back from you,” she laughed, the dimples in her smile making my stomach flutter upside down.

“Nah, you ain’t never gonna let that go. Are you?” The quick shake to the head was all the confirmation I needed. “How about this, I take you out tomorrow from brunch or something along the lines of that and we just catch up completely. No bullshit, just like LSU days,” Her lips twisted to the side as she tapped her finger on her chin a few times in contemplation. From what I remember of Drew, she has always been stubborn but that’s what attracted me to her instantly. She had a good head on her shoulder and what could be looked at as arrogance was actually her just being confident which is one thing we had in common from the jump.

She was fiery, passionate and a damn bad ass athlete. Not to mention I thought she was so beautiful and still do, to this day. She was naturally a tom boy; she dressed in nothing but Nike tracksuits and Jordan’s. But she made it work because she always had her hair done up, nails on like Flo Jo and would do her make up every now and then. Then when she really wanted to show out, she would completely dress up and would wear the tightest possible dresses ever. And of course, that would piss me off because of all the attention she would get from guys. If it wasn’t from me and me only, I didn’t want her receiving anyone else’s attention.

We fit together like puzzle pieces.

“It’s a deal, but only on the ground that I get to choose the location,” she smirked.

“You know I like to take control. Let me pick it and you pay,” I countered.

Her laughter radiated and became louder as she bent down a little. “Fuck all the way off!” she continued to laugh. “You still owe me for running me dry from my Tiger card. I swear you was only my friend for the food,” she recalled.

“Nah, you know better than that. But the 5 dining hall was the spot. You know damn well I couldn’t resist them omelets,” I laughed.

“No, you’re absolutely right. Well worth it,” she smiled. “Well, I guess this is the part where I assume we exchange information again?”

“I follow you on Instagram already,” I admitted.

“Since when?” she questioned.

“Today. After the basketball game, actually. I had to make a completely new account once I hit the pros and your old handle no longer worked so I had to do a little extra work to get your current handle,”

“Boy, bye. What extra work? You still just as dramatic as ever,” she waved off. “I guess I can do a quick follow back,” she teased.

“And while you’re at it, maybe slide me your number too,” I said, reaching for my phone, only to remember that it was dead. “Shit, or maybe you put my number in and just text me. My phone is dead,”

“Ah, making me do the work. If I text and don’t receive a text back, you’re going on the blogs, Beckham,” she said, pointing her nails in my chest.

“Deal, baby girl,” I smiled.

[aesthetic-dani]

Thank you my love.

I write to you from my new home. In a different state and on my own. I write to you to say I am thankful for you. I am writing this because I want to apologize and confess and give you the credit you deserve before I start writing to someone else. 

I was going through some old photos and videos and I stumbled upon our conversations from almost two years ago (I know October 23-24 would mark our two year anniversary. And I also know it is on the 24th but you know I always thought 23 was a better number). I saw some pictures of when your hair was short, and screenshots of us sleep-calling. There are videos of you laying on your stomach and smiling up towards me (towards that rack above your bed at your dad’s place). There are some screenshots of when we used the God-Awful skype to call, and from when you visited me in November 2018 and May  2019. I had done such a good job of avoiding the though of you that when I did remember, I was bathed in blue. Oh God, do I miss you. Even my mom has looked back at the pictures and mentioned how happy I was with you. How happy you made me. I miss you as both my lover and my best friend. I miss you as my brief partner in life. I miss your voice and your care and your love and your patience. I miss you broski. And I love you too! I love you so so very much, and I apologize for when I made you not feel that way. I apologize for when I was difficult and moody and for hurting you sometimes. I miss your perfect nose and autumn locks. I miss your freckles and your ghost-white skin. I miss your green eyes. They are so beautiful! The way you looked at me was too. You treated me like your princess and your baby girl and like I was above anything and everything. You taught me my worth through example. You loved me so very much that now I am a bit afraid no one will be as good to me as you were. You warned me, I know you did. But right now I miss you terribly and it is poisoning me. I want to play with your hair. I want your hands to pull me and shelter me and rub against my skin. And your face, it is so gorgeous! I haven’t said this in a while... You are beautiful my love. You as a physical being and you for who you are, you are beautiful. Expressing your emotions is an act of courage. Feeling your feelings one of bravery. I admire you Logan. I admire you for pulling both yourself and me together, for being strong and patient and believing in us. Logan, I love you! I like saying your name, it brings me happy memories. I hope when you think of me you feel warm inside too. Oh dear, I hope you find something in life that you love as much as you loved me. I was always scared to say that. I was always scared to say that I felt like I was the most exciting part of your day. Regardless of how flattering that is, I just hope your feelings to not lead your path. A lot of girls feed on love and break young boy’s hearts. I told you I would not let them hurt you, and I mean it. You are my boy and I am your girl. Forever and always each other’s first love. I have so many mixed emotions, and to be honest, I just miss you terribly. I miss knowing how you are doing and being there for you too. I miss talking and laughing for hours on Face Time. I miss having the hard conversations too, those where I would end up mad and apologize later. I miss being loved, desired and respected all in equal parts. I miss being able to talk to you and tell you the funny bits and pieces of my day. My love, New York has many stories to be told and I just wish you were here.

 Sometimes I want to know if you miss me too. Sometimes I want to know if you have met another girl, if your feelings for me have changed, if you hate me (as I said you would) or if you are heart-broken still. On good days I like to think that you still love me in some type of way and that you dont hate me. On bad days, I think you have found another girl and that you wish I was not around anymore. On normal days, I hope I am still your best-friend. 

I am crying right now and I wish your thumbs were pressed against my cheeks telling me it is okay. 

I am well aware I am not making justice to all of the great moments we had, but what can I say... You just made my life better for the past two years. I will forever be thankful for that. Thank you for taking me out on the cutest date to the arcade and the trampoline jumping place, and for kissing me every other minute and holding my hand. Thank you for helping me build my confidence and allowing me to explore parts of myself I didn’t know existed.

Thank you for allowing me to love you.

I want to apologize for more recent things you do not know about. First, because I have called you my ex and not my best friend, which is who you really are. I am also sorry because for a while I wanted to forget you, maybe so I could ignore the harsh decision and sad feelings that were created. I truly regret that. I want to always honor you, honor us, and the wholesome relationship we had. I want to keep it safe in a glass box. I want to keep it as my treasure. I want to remember you as my first true love. As the best lover I have had. I want you to keep a piece of my heart, it was well earned my dear. But on a sadder note, I would also like to apologize for not keeping up with my word. I met up with some random person I found online (This happened this week, I respected our celibate month). I met up with him and things escalated quickly. To make a long story short and less painful, we hooked up and he left some marks. I know you would look sad and say, “Dani, no.... A baby no...”. You are right, I should have not been out there, but I did. I was weak and I am sorry my dear, I did not take care of myself the way I should have (the way you would have).  I did not enjoy this encounter much. Not only because I did not know him well but because it was not you. This inconvenient moment of my  youth brought me to a little realization. I still want you to be my first. I trust you with my feelings and my body, and I want you to have it. If I can give myself to anyone out there, I want it to be you my dear. I think your marks are so pretty on me. I think as friends or lovers we would have a great time. If I ever want to smoke some pot, I want to be by your side. I want you to take care of me, making sure I am having fun and that I am okay. I want to take a road trip in an electric van. Please come with me my love. I want to experience so many things with you for the first time. I call this a fantasy because I do not know how or if it will happen at all. Making love for the first time and a road trip with you are my top picks though, I trust you broski. 

I guess I am writing this letter to say Thank You My Love. I love you and miss you and I am happy for all the things we did. I hope to see you in the future my dear. I might write you some more letters, or I may correspond to someone else. But please do not be in pain if that is the case. They are not my firsts and they do not own my heart. You do. 

With love, Dani. 

10/10/2019

[ardentlythieving]

HEWWO EVERYBODY IT’S END OF YEAR RECAP TIME WITH ME: UR PAL ARDO

First of all if ur reading this, merry christmas if u celebrate it and happy holidays if u don’t!!! Y’all are amazing people and I hope this time of year is a good one for you, and if it’s not I hope you find the time to do smth nice for urself!!

Dam this year has been crazy tho. I mean if ur dash is anything like mine you’ve prob seen all those posts talking about how long this year has felt re: the sheer amount of stuff happening. But on a more individual level there’s some stuff I wanna say I guess so in no particular order here is my Thoughts™ coz there’s been some good, some bad, and some weird this year. 

So, this year has been a kind of wild one for me in terms of things changing. The big one being that I started university and kinda lost contact with most of my pals from high school. All goods tho, coz I met some amazing new people thru tabletop gaming who idk if I’m at the friends point with yet, but I defo wanna try and get there coz they’re cool as heck. It’s true what people say that starting university is a big change coz DAM things have been wild and hopefully are gonna keep being wild next year espc coz one of my online friends is moving down to start at my university and I’m super excited to meet her in person!! Speaking of meeting people in person I finally got to hang out with @chipmunkwithwings at her place and that was one of the highlights of my year for sure! She’s a super cool person and that week was just utterly brilliant.

Anyways while we’re on the topic of friends this year sure has been exciting for that as well. I’ve made some amazing new ones, gotten closer with some older ones, had some drift apart and thru it all I’ve learnt something important. Namely that, there’s nothing wrong with the friends I had before, but I’ve felt so much better and it’s just been so much healthier for me now I’ve also started pursuing and focusing on friendships with people around my age. It sounds weird to say, but despite having a good collection of close friends there was a part of me that was lonely, and that part has kinda stopped being so much now not all my friends are 10ish years older than me. 

That’s one thing I’ve discovered, but this year has been a big one for discovery for me. I tried a bunch of different papers and found out that I hate international relations and love philosophy. I’ve started learning Swedish!! And probably the biggest and most important discovery: thanks to my friends telling me “dude you really need to do this” I’ve gotten on anti-depressants!!! Which have really been helping me so much. That’s probably.... my biggest regret is that I didn’t get on them a few years ago. Still, I’m on them now and my head is just working so much better. Also, and I’ve talked about this in an earlier post so if you wanna kno deets you can go read it, I properly I guess remembered? stopped repressing? how a friend abused me a few years ago and started working thru the issues I have because of that.  

At this point I’m gonna put things under a cut coz this is where shit is gonna get long. 

Some letters, to the people I’ve known this year. I know a LOT of people so I’m prob gonna not mention anyone so if I don’t mention you: I love y’all. Ur so so fucking brilliant all of u and I’m honored to know you and to have had this chance to be in contact with y’all. I’m deeply sorry for any way I might have wronged you over this year, and if any of you wronged ME I forgive you entirely. If any of you haven’t really talked to me, but want to; or if we’ve drifted outta contact and you wanna pick things back up or ANYTHING at all feel free to msg me anytime. My discord is ardentlyThieving#4893 and this is an open invitation to anyone reading this coz there’s a ton of cool ppl on here who I haven’t talked to as much as I’d like. Anyways onto the individual stuff.

To the afternoon gang. You guys all mean so so fucking much to me, more than probably anyone else. Ur my best support network, my greatest pals. Being friends with you all is a fucking delight. I know I’m not always active in our server, but trust me that it’s nothing on you. I’ve enjoyed every moment hanging out with you guys. Or well, most of them at least :P. We have the wildest conversations and trust me, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I know some of you guys have had a hard time this year and I’m so sorry that you guys are going thru that shit coz y’all deserve so much better. It’s my deepest hope that next year is a good one for all of you and if there’s every anything I can do you guys know where to find me. I love you so so so so so much and I hope these last few days of 2018 are as good for you as they can possibly be.

To the people of Eff’s servers. You guys are super duper cool. Being salty with y’all is so much fun and also so deeply annoying that people keep pulling this shit that we gotta be salty about. I love the fact that we can go from shitty meme posting (usually my fault) to having in depth n thoughtful conversations about just about anything (hopefully usually not my fault). Y’all are amazing people and it feels like you’ve all found urselves a bit more this year, which I’m so happy for you about.

To Sakshi. That’s right, u get an individual one. Ur like, my hero. Srsly dude the fact that ur so fucking patient with the utter dumbasses msging you and that u started this whole deep conversation that ur not backing down from? I’m so proud of you, I admire you so much, and you have my utmost support. Hmu if you ever need me to drag someone for you. Also i’m sorry to out you as a gamer to the fine people of tumblr dot com (actually I’m not that sorry) but it’s been so much fun playing swtor with you. And salt watching things with you. I love how fun our friendship is and also how we can have proper deep conversations like 10/10 A+ content. 

To Hammi. Dude you are awesomesauce. My fave lesbian pal. I love memeing with you and gaming with you and chatting with you. Here’s to another great year broski!

To Clare. We’ve only just met at the very end of this year and I’m so glad we did. Ur super cool and funny and I love ur art n posts.

To my swtor guild. Another group of wonderful people who I’ve only just met. i’m so fucking excited to get to know all of you better coz y’all have such great swtor opinions and are so much fun to play with. Sorry about what I did to the Gizka flagship bridge lmao.

To Sofa. DUDE HI! becoming friends with you this year has been one of the highlights. Thank you for all the support you’ve given me and for all the fun times we’ve had. I adore playing video games with you and I fucking love ur swtor ocs. You’ve been there for me so much, and I hope I’ve been there for you as well. Thank you for everything.

To Marie. Yet another person I met later on this year and haven’t had the chance to get so close with. Defo my bad there I need to msg you more often. Thanks for being there for me, even though I was kind of a shitty friend to you at one point. I didn’t deserve ur patience but you gave it to me anyway and I’m so fuckin grateful for that. I hope to make that up to you in the coming year. <3

To Jason. We were tight at the start of the year and kinda drifted apart which I regret. Msg me anytime dude and if you ever reinstall swtor you should totally hmu coz playing it with you was a ton of fun!! 

To Traya. I know we’ve only talked on and off this year, but I’m so excited for you to be at my university and to hang out in person!! Hang in there dude, coz there’s so many cool people for you to meet and take it from me that university really is so much better than college.

Ok this is where the happy positivity ends!! Again I love y’all so much and I hope that next year is better for all of you then this one was!!! Thanks for being pals with me, I appreciate it so much even when I’m not great at showing it.

Coz there’s one more letter I gotta write coz after however many years I want closure. This is where it ends.

To Teri. Wow. I never thought I’d be saying ur name again. Well typing, but w/e. That first year we were friends was so fucking good and I’m glad we had that, coz you were a pretty cool person. I dunno why you decided to change all that and start hurting me and I’m probably never gonna understand but you know what? That’s ok. I don’t need to. You hurt me, I got out. I’m not sure, but I think you were being hurt by people as well and I hope you got out like I did. No matter how badly you treated me you still don’t deserve to be abused urself. Nobody deserves that. I don’t know if I forgive you, and I don’t know if I ever will, but I hope things are better for you now. I’m sorry for the times I wronged you while we were friends. This isn’t me saying I deserved to be abused by you, because I sure as hell didn’t, but well. Two wrongs don’t make a right and ur abuse doesn’t magically erase the times I wasn’t the greatest friend. I thought ignoring the things you did to me would make things better, but instead I let it all fester inside me and change my behaviour without realizing that’s what happened. So this is me letting go of it all. Coz you don’t get to fuckin take anything else away from me. I’m better now than I was then despite everything you did to me. This is me, making a conscious choice to heal and move on and grow. It’s not gonna be easy, but imma do it and it’s gonna be so fucking wonderful. This is Arden signing out because you don’t GET to have any control over my life anymore. Never ever again.

[subbyp]

people still write ygo chatfic in 2019 right?

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: so Mokuba and I had another screaming operatic fight

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: with the slamming of doors and gnashing of teeth and such. Just because I told him he can’t get a tattoo until he turns 18. He’s already got way more piercings than he needs--why is getting a tattoo NOW so goddamn urgent that he needs to make a big stink over it?

roll them bones|theduke: don’t knock em until you tried em broski

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: How do you know I don’t have one?

roll them bones|theduke: shit dude

roll them bones|theduke: now that you mention it I don’t know

roll them bones|theduke: roll call who’s seen Kaiba naked. gimme them DEETS

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: not telling :p

patience and faith|jetea: oh god

hey gamers|ymotoudarkmage: I bet it’s a big buff rippling dragonman

patience and faith|jetea: yugi I beg of you

hey gamers|ymotoudarkmage: with a magnificent beard

patience and faith|jetea: yugi pls

hey gamers|ymotoudarkmage: the beard is in the shape of a dragon

YUGI STOP|jetea: I will pay you money to stop making me picture this

can’t be tamed|ymotoudarkmage: the dragon is nude

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: Anyway [he said, completely ignoring the hideous unintended results of his seemingly harmless joke] that’s the unrest in the house of Kaiba

beep beep motherfuckers|trisssss: <atla>that’s rough, buddy</atla>

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: I wasn’t so melodramatic at that age.

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: ....was I?

YUGI STOP|jetea: You absolutely were.

can’t be tamed|ymotoudarkmage: you’re joking, right?

roll them bones|theduke: you were worse than me

beep beep motherfuckers|trisssss: dude

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: babe you had a Drama Blimp

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: Why do I even talk to you people?

beep beep motherfuckers|trisssss: because we’re the only people you don’t intimidate

beep beep motherfuckers|trisssss: blimpy boy

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: anyways as an impending teacher let me lay it out for you lord zeppeli

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: teenagers are making the beginnings of what will become their adult identity

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: everything seems so important to him bcuz he’s forging in the smithy of his soul his whatever and shit

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: I’m overcome by your eloquence.

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: he feels like he has to fight to assert himself because he’s transitioning from your little baby brother into a grown man, and he sees your rules as interfering with that process and through that his entire steeze

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: his steeze of adulthood

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: his maturisteeze

roll them bones|theduke: don’t sneeze at the steeze

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: so cut him a little slack. he feels like he’s fighting for his very soul.

beep beep motherfuckers|trisssss: a soul to steeze

YUGI STOP|jetea: his

YUGI STOP|jetea: his episteezeology

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: That actually makes sense.

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu:  Not the “steeze” shit, the other thing.

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: Thanks.

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: np 

BYYOURPOWERSCOMBINE|jayjaydogg: my big sexy helium friend

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: Wheeler, I swear to all that is holy that I will stop at nothing until I obliterate you and your goddamn blimp jokes from this earth

can’t be tamed|ymotoudarkmage: that sounds like a lot of hot air to me

Nerd Herder|sk_ryu: You’re next, Motou

i’m late! i’m late!|unnatural20: Wait, which dragon is nude?

can’t be tamed|ymotoudarkmage: both of them

[hs-fusions]

Hey guys! We finally decided to re-open our ask box seeing how cluttered it became over the months! Don’t worry if your ask wasn’t answered yet, just send it again! You can always browse the blog to see the different mods’ work and get a feel for what we’re all about ^^

We’re accepting fusions of homestuck and hiveswap characters - try not to include other fandoms in your asks, unless you really have a Vision™ then we’ll see :3c Remember, submissions of your own fusions and fanart of ours is always welcome! You can submit or tag us in the post, we’ll be sure to see it~

(Currently I won’t be able to answer asks, since im out on vacay, but theres a bunch more people on the blog that will!)

The awesome art was made by mod broski @broskisbroblog! Thank you for reading and for your patience with us 💖

- mod suzy

[bleedingviolet]

Alright, so this is long overdue. I was gonna do this when I hit 200 followers BUT meh I GOT A LOTTA LOVE TO GIVE SO.

First of all, I love every single one of my followers, but these people have made me feel super welcome within in this community -which means so much to me you guys omg. About a year ago, I had a bit of a breakdown and deleted my roleplay blogs because of bad experiences I had. Honestly, jumping back into this has been so refreshing and I remember why I loved it so much in the first place. So thank you all! ❤️ ANYWAYS LEMME @ YOU MY LOVES

@jxniordetective: okay buckaroo you know I love you and your muse but honestly you were one of the first people to interact with Harper and I know it’s only been, what, 3-ish weeks but I consider you a friend. Your writing is A+++ Keep rockin’ on, my broski. 👌👌

@mechanical-gardener: We haven't had talked much ooc but I seriously look forward to your notifications and replies. Henry is amazing and I’d 100% die for him (or maybe that’s Harper talking haha idk). Your writing style is super and fluid and just perfect for RP and ahhhhh *points semi-agressively at you* ily, ya nerd! 👉😎👉

@pigeon-boyxx: Again, not too much ooc talk, but you’re super sweet and OMG TALENTED AF. Your portrayal of Rupert is art in itself and then you gotta go and bless me with actual art of the precious pigeon boy? 🙌❤️

@smolcuriouskitty: we haven't talked too much ooc but you’re precious and so is Rockelle. I love seeing you pop up in my inbox and omg thank you for you patience with my slowass replies (omg i suck). Literally, can I borrow some of your positivity??? 😊

@adhdnightmare: don’t think I don’t notice you lurking in my notifications and inbox :P I’m looking forward to RPing with you and getting to know ya better! 😬❤️

@literally everyone else I’ve ever interacted with on this blog:

[tmsbrainrot]

SOS

Summary: You were living a pretty normal life until someone, or something, broke into your apartment one fateful night. Now you find yourself in the middle of a war, one that will test the very limits of your mental, physical, and emotional strength. No way are you doing this without your best friend.

Genre: Fantasy AU, genderless reader + EXO

Word count: 737

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | ?

“Soo, I think there’s someone in my apartment.”

“...you?”

“Besides me, you dick!” You hiss, almost forgetting to keep your voice low.

Static crackles as Kyungsoo sighs into the phone. “So why are you calling me at 3:23am and not, you know, the police?”

You open your mouth to snap a witty response but pause, logic over-ruling your constant desire to be a smartass. “Hm, good question.”

“Maybe it was just the wind, or some dishes trying to escape the hell that is your kitchen sink.”

“It’s not that bad!”

“Pretty sure it has its own ecosystem.”

You pull your phone away from your ear and squeeze your eyes shut, taking deep breaths and praying to the gods for patience. Kyungsoo was your best friend, your ride-or-die, your ultimate broski, but jesus was he a pain in the ass.

“Soo, I don’t think you’re taking this situation seriously,” you whisper. “I hear someone sneaking around my apartment at 3:23am and think ‘oh god, this is the end. This is how I die. Some wacko breaks into my apartment and suffocates me with my own memory foam pillow that I paid twelve bucks for. Guess that’s what I get for not forwarding that chain email in fifth grade. Better call my bestest friend in the whole world and tell him a tearful goodbye.’” You realise that you aren’t really whispering anymore and lower your voice again, “So I call you, only to have you tell me my call is unwelcome and that the pile of unwashed dishes in my sink is unsanitary.”

There’s silence on Kyungsoo’s end.

“Hello?” You whisper.

“Huh? Oh sorry, I think I dozed off for a second. What did you say?”

“YOU FUCKING--”

Crash!

The unmistakable sound of a glass smashing causes you to leap out of bed whilst letting out a yelp of terror. Your heart is beating so fast you’re afraid it’s going to give out as you press yourself against the wall opposite the door to your room. With wide eyes you stare at the door, expecting it to burst open any moment. A muffled voice is saying something that you can’t quite make out over the sound of your own heartbeat thundering in your ears. The voice is familiar. It sounds like... Kyungsoo.

You realise your phone is no longer in your hand. Glancing at the bed you see the soft glow from the screen illuminating your baby blue bed sheets. Kyungsoo is still speaking and you take a step towards the bed, arms reaching out to grasp the metaphorical safety line, but before you can the handle on the door begins to turn.

Instantly your fight-or-flight instinct kicks in, causing you to fly across the room and slam your body against the door. There’s a grunt of annoyance from the intruder as the door refuses to budge, and you thank the gods that you kept up your weekly gym sessions with Kyungsoo. Planting your feet firmly and keeping all your weight against the door you call out in what you hope is a menacing tone (and not a ‘I’m-gonna-pee-my-pants’ one), “Listen up, asshat. I don’t know how you got into my apartment or why you broke one of my precious glasses but I’ve called the cops so you better scam.” You pause for a second before adding, “Also I know some sick judo moves so don’t even try me.”

Silence. A couple minutes pass.

Huh, maybe my bluffing was convincing... You think. Should I go into acting?

Suddenly a thump snaps you back to reality and you pull back from the door slightly in shock as something heavy falls against it. You assume that the intruder is attempting to break the door down using their body so you double your efforts to keep it closed. To your surprise you hear a groan of pain through the door, followed by the sound of a body slumping to the floor.

Is this a trick? Were they just pretending to give up so you would open the door? Part of you believed it was a ruse, that as soon as you pulled away the door would burst open and it’d be lights out forever, but a larger part of you was overcome with curiosity and a strange sense of urgency. Your gut was telling you that something big was about to happen, something life-changing. It was telling you to open the door.

---------------

A.N. It’s nearly 3am and I haven’t proofread this so I’m sorry if it’s bad. It’s my first story for a while and I had a lot of fun writing it so I’d be glad to hear if anyone wants me to continue! This will be part one of the series 

[runningfatboy]

TRIPLE A MENTALITY OF WEIGHT LOSS: 1.ACCEPTANCE;2. AWARENESS:3.ACKNOWLEDGMENT Based on my personal experience we need these three abilities to start taking care of our body. ACCEPTANCE. A year ago I realized I needed to do drastic changes. It was a long trial and error before I finally understood what I needed to do. Before and during that period, I had created an illusion that I am not that fat and that 290 lbs guy in the mirror. What I saw was my image seven years ago when I managed to trim down to 168 lbs with the toned body and abs. It was a difficult period and I had to look at several pictures before I came to reality that my waist is already at 46 inches and it was a daily challenge for me tying my shoelaces. AWARENESS. With the reality check already done, I had to know my body very well do what is necessary to be done. I was terrified during that time but I decided not to succumb. I started experimenting with my body. I did intermittent fasting, low carb and low sugar, one meal a day, and started working out. Results slowly started manifesting. I was feeling better. My outlook in life is brighter. My old pants is too big for me now. From a waist of 46 and now 38. From 290 lbs and now 230 lbs. From XXL to L. ACKNOWLEDGE. Your BODY: “You’ve been criticizing yourself and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happen.” Be proud of your accomplishments and recognize the results. Be proud of your body and fall in love taking care of it. Your SURROUNDING. The people who have been with you since day 1 and all the people who in one way or another encouraged you to push harder and to get up when you’re ready to quit. So, thank you to my wife, @hypergen, for your bottomless patience, understanding, and support. To my family for their untiring support. To @joboasiddao for introducing me to #CrossFit and continuously guiding me, to my first love box, @cfkatipunan HAPPY ANNIVERSARY), the #cfkmorningkrew, the #broskis, the #teamTfitness. And everyone who encouraged me in one way or another. Thank you very much! YOUR SELF. At the end of the day, it’s all about you. #thirtydayprogress #onestepatatime #letsmakefithappen #goals #noexcuses #hwpo https://www.instagram.com/p/B2Da2Ibn0ct/?igshid=1qb9t0mudc26c