#thanks for fueling my derangement anon much obliged

[oatflatwhite]

okay well now we need your intellectual ranking of buck’s looks over the seasons. a top 5. academic analysis included

OK YOU ASKED FOR IT *cracks knuckles*

so if we're doing an "intellectual ranking" we'll need categories right? i propose sorting buck's looks by:

hotness

softness

how much each specific scene makes me want to eat glass (because as hot or soft as he might be for me, personally, it truly comes down to context)

each rated out of five. and introducing a fourth bonus category called "is he wet y/n" (water/sweat/blood included!)

based on this infallible system i present to you: an intellectual ranking of buck’s looks over the seasons (my top five + honourable mentions)

5. texas buck (ls 2.03 hold the line)

i know we all talk about crossover eddie but can we discuss crossover buck? please? it is a known fact oliver stark looks good in orange/yellow and boy does he prove it here. the lafd bomber jacket is also a look. the 118 ATE in texas and cherry on top is buck’s confused puppy face when tk assumes he’s hitting on him.

hotness 5/5, softness 4/5, do i want to eat glass 2/5, is he wet y/n = 11

4. pilot buck (1.01 pilot)

when i say pilot buck i am talking about this specific scene. also the shirtless scene on the rooftop but mostly this scene. am i a lesbian? well, yeah, i’m pretty sure. am i barking directly at it? well, yeah, i’m pretty sure!

hotness 5/5, softness 4/5, do i want to eat glass 3/5, is he wet y/n = 12

3. gurney buck (4.06 jinx)

how oliver stark manages to look both sexy and endearing in a face mask is beyond me but here we are. the attraction in this look lies not only in the look itself but the idea of the look: buck, the tallest member of the 118 by quite a margin, laid out gazelle-limbs on the gurney. you can’t make this shit up. unless you’re the writer/director for jinx in which case i guess you did make this shit up. thank you for your service.

hotness 5/5, softness 5/5, do i want to eat glass 3/5, is he wet y/n = 13

2. "hey” buck (survivors 4.14)

this whole episode? a work of art. this specific scene? do i need to go on? no but i will: running through the hospital like heathcliff searching for kathy on the moors. the slow zoom on eddie (ana? quie literally moving out of the frame if i think about this too hard i become unhinged) then buck. the softness of the “hey”. the cosy jumper. the curls! THE CURLS! work of art etc. etc.

hotness 5/5, softness 5/5, do i want to eat glass 5/5, is he wet y/n = 15

and before we get to my #1, some honourable mentions:

sharknado buck (2.11 new beginnings)

is this ensemble groundbreaking? not really. do i prefer his hair messy and curly? yeah of course have you looked at my blog. does any of this even matter when he’s smiling so big and wide like this it breaks my heart open in two like i’ve cracked an egg???

balcony buck (5.04 home and away)

and a recent contender enters the ring! *hits bell* there is just something so erotic about staring at your best friend with a black eye you’re icing with an ice pack he probably made up for you while wearing your comfiest trackpants and hoodie and he tells you exactly what you need to hear because he knows you better than the back of his hand <3 once again context is everything but also i like to see my favourite boy a little squished. a little dented. all the better to love you my dear <3

fire marshal buck (3.04 triggers)

the shirt so snug over his biceps it’s almost ripping. the tie pin. the clipboard. oh yeah it’s all coming together.

backwards cap buck (4.06 jinx)

the frat boyism. the unparalleled dumbassery. no thoughts head empty. and like i know i KNOW the cap is simply a costume device to make him look younger with minimal effort but also if i close my eyes i do not see <3

bulletproof vest buck (2.01 under pressure / 4.14 survivors)

couldn’t find the gif for survivors but this is hot too. i know something else i’d like to see him strap on

AND FINALLY...

DRUMROLL...

1. “that’s what buck means to me” buck (4.05 buck begins)

(gif credit @mediagifs because i couldn’t find it in gif search and needed this specific moment)

where do i even start. the curls. the soot. the wry smile. the emotional turmoil of the episode ripping me open like i’m a can of tuna and it’s a can opener. objectively there is nothing special about this outfit it is literally just his turnout gear but there is a... how do you say... je ne sais quoi. yes he is my mentally unhealthy six foot two fictional best friend/boyfriend/son <3 keep walking <3

hotness 5/5, softness 5/5, do i want to eat glass 5/5,is he wet y/n = 15 + bonus 💦

thus concludes my academic analysis of buck’s best looks. please note these are subject to change at any given moment on any whim i please. also i now realise i said before s4 is not my favourite hair era yet most of these are s4 what can i say i’m untrustworthy <3