#that you wouldn't be able to tell unless i took a pic of them side by side

[jensownzoo]

In the ongoing saga of the sheer stubbornness of my pullets' puberty which has them laying their first eggs at completely the wrong time of year daylength-wise...

One of the crested cream legbars has entered the competition.

[nostuntmanneeded]

So Seb let all of these hateful memes of his “GF” into his tags for a really long time and then it stopped once she came back stat side. I wanna know what happened there. Did she finally speak up or did his team say stop it doesn’t look good. Since she appeared back in LA I’ve been wondering if they turned real. // This makes sense but l wanna share my two cents as well, I'm almost positive he was asked by his team to stop because it definitely sealed the deal that it was PR that time because he didn't just approve the memes mocking her baits, he was also approving stuff similar to those "blink if you need help" type of memes, and people we're so sure it was PR that time because he was doing it a lot and naturally, people would be curious as to why would he approve such memes and insult his "girlfriend", she shouldn't have to call her own "boyfriend" out for something that insulting and demeaning, any normal partner who respects their significant other wouldn't even think of doing that. He spent a lot of time approving those memes, before even making actual efforts to acknowledge her on social media and if he did stop because she told him to well ain't that funny that she has the audacity to call him out for approving those accurate memes when she won't even take down the posts much less, apologize for it. As for the things that went down in LA, it was already anticipated that they were gonna ramp things up for so many reasons as 1. The one year mark was already approaching by that time and yet people were barely buying their shit and refused to take them seriously 2. They had to make up for the lost time when he was filming Fresh and she was back in Spain and 3. As mentioned, the presumed end was approaching so it was important to up their game. Also, try to keep in mind that the reason mostly as to why it looks more believable now because they changed tactics, because the pap walks obviously weren't working, it did nothing but expose their loopholes so they decided to focus on "public sightings" and social media interactions. Don't you find it at least a bit sketchy that there weren't public sightings of them at all before and so were the interactions and now all of a sudden, we're getting lots of them? It took him months to follow her and another month/s to actually acknowledge her and interact with her. Notice how they were constantly getting papped before and now not a single pap pic? Unless you count that joke from the P&T set. Moreover, if you come to think of it, the tactics only got upgraded but the handling of the stunt was still sloppy, it's predictable and there are way too many apparent patterns like the black and white pictures and weekend stunts and everything is just way too damn predictable, I mean people were even able to predict that she was going to be LA exactly 2 weeks after being in Tulum. The reason for my adamance on believing that this is PR is not because I'm being stubborn or that I refuse to accept the possibility of it being real, I simply can't set aside all these factors and all too telling behavior. ,

Exactly!

There is a good possibility that his team told him to stop. They can't blow their cover, or else the contract is dead and no one gets any benefits.

Alejandra being in L.A. made it more important to cut the approval of tags ridiculing their relationship. And remember how she limited her comments even more to stop the flow of negative comments.

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Yes yes I'm safe. Thank you for worrying for me. I actually hadn't thought about it for a while. This will be very long. Please forgive me.

I would love to tell you since I don't have many people to tell.

TW: stalking, mention of r*pe, eating disorder(?)

So about a year into uni (I was 19) this guy who i thought was actually pretty cool (well dressed even though everyone knew his financial situation is bad, knowledgeable, excited for life, was working on a project to help people in need) was introduced to me by my friend. He liked my her and he chose to email her about it. Which was weird, this happened only a few years ago. She is really sweet and isn't the kind to outright reject people so I helped her with what to reply with, and he thought she only rejected him because he was poor. Then all hell broke loose. He suddenly became disheveled. Looked like he didn't sleep. Dropped all of his projects to the point where they failed. The only thing that didn't change about him is his social interactions. He was uppity and would make sure to sit with us, and befriend people in our circle that he hadn't met.

Over the course of the next year she would continue to reject him with my aid, and he would keep trying. I would talk to him just to know what's going on with him because I was scared for my friend because of how prisistant he was being. I talked him into trying for therapy after he told me some things that happened in his childhood, I was even in contact with his therapist at some point because he was worried he was lying to her. I emailed her with what's actually happening. He even once told me that the situation makes him so mad that he fantasised about rape. I couldn't tell my friend, I probably should've but she had severe anxiety. I started walking her to and from classes, and I bought a pocket knife.

That's when he started being weird to me. We'd leave on the same bus since we lived in the same area, and he would text me things like "I'm behind you." I obviously knew he was sitting behind me, but I tried to ignore him.

I couldn't tell anyone because my friend didn't want to tell anyone about what was happening with her, and we had the same friend group.

I was dating at the time, and he hated my boyfriend and his best friend really badly because they sensed a weird vibe from him and wouldn't leave us alone with him. He wouldn't even refer to them by name. I could see the hatred in his eyes. He even expressed to me that he couldn't be himself around me because of them.

One day, I had to leave uni at sunset, uni was empty and I was waiting for the bus. He comes and sits with me and I was really scared, there really was no one except me and the housekeeping staff, and he was two years older older me so he should be done with all the courses that require him to stay late. I'm normally not easily scared, but that day something felt off. I told him I needed to go get food and that I'll go alone, and I went to a supermarket that's outside the other side of campus, separated by a large building and a lot of stairs. As soon as I leave campus I turn around and I spot that he's been following me. He is maybe 800 m away. He doesn't turn around. Doesn't pretent to be doing anything else. Just stands there. I quickly texted my ex and told him, asked if he was awake and if could call him. Luckily it took my ex 5 minutes to come to campus. He was still there when my ex arrived. He hadn't moved an inch. He kept staring at my ex as if he'd massacred his entire family. My ex walked me to the bus and I went home safely.

When he realised he couldn't get to me on campus because my guy friends wouldn't let him, he started trying to get me to meet him outside of uni, I don't know if he knew that I knew what he was doing. I kept refusing and telling him I'm not going to see him at all. He then sent me a text that goes like this:

"Going on a walk. You can join if you want. I can pick you up from your house. And we can go from there. Tell me if you're interested. I'm going at 5 pm."

My house? How does he know where my house is? No one from uni know where I live specifically. Sure they know the part of the city I live in, because I go by bus, but no one ever drove me there. Unless he had followed me home since we go by the same bus.

I became paranoid, and I was going through unrelated trouble with my ex so I didn't get to tell him. I couldn't tell my friend because she'll panic. I couldn't cut contact with him because I knew he wanted to hurt my friend, and he would usually overshare on text so I would know if he was planning anything. There was nothing I could do but wait. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat. I was malnutritioned to the point where I was passing out randomly and my hair started to fall out in clumps.

That seemed to give him the greenlight. He bought me a gift. He even sent me an indirect feet pic (all my friends know i get really uncomfortable seeing feet, he knew this, he sent it on purpose) and I put up with it all, I don't know if it was the right thing to do. I was scared that any action I take will make him hurt my friend.

His therapist told him to not talk to her, then to act normal around her, but when he tried she obviously wasn't able to treat him normally. He told her it was doctors orders. She just couldn't, understandably.

She blocked him everywhere and I thought it was over. Until one day he comes up to me in person, and he says

"You'll be so mad at me. I did something bad."

And he said it cheekily, as if I was supposed to find it cute.

My friend was in the lecture hall right behind me so I wasn't worried about her. I ignored him.

Two days later she sends me a screenshot from the website of uni platform. A death threat in the direct messages of the platform.

My friend chooses to tell our friends, and our friends suggest that now that he abused the university platform, we can go to them, and they'll deal with it from there. That was the first time my friend mentions it to her family.

The uni holds a trial of sorts, and deems him less responsible because he was pn bpd medication. They make him sign an oath that if he every speaks to her or gets physically close to her he will be expelled. This has worked. He left her alone and we haven't heard from him since. I saw him occasionally, and when I was volunteering on campus he'd stay away from my booth, even if the people he was walking with came to talk to me, so I assume he thought I was included too.

A day after the trial my boyfriend and I broke up, I wasn't sad about the breakup as much as I was sad about never being able to tell him the details, because my friend didn't want anyone to know, and now that he knew, I'll never be able to tell him what I personally went through. Sure, i had confided in him the general outline of what was happening, against my friend's will, but I couldn't tell him how paranoid I had been.

I changed address shortly after, only out of pure luck, had my financial situation been slightly worse I would still have to live there.

I have graduated.

This is the first time I tell anyone about the harassment I endured. No one knows about his rape fantasies, no one knows about the stalking. I hope no one who knows me personally finds it, but it felt good to let it off my chest.

This is horrific. You were such a good friend honestly, but your friend was selfish and put you in danger by not allowing you to tell the people around you anything about it. It’s not fair especially that it involved you too. You went through so much for her, to protect her, and she prevented you from having someone to support you. what if he had done something to you? 

i’m not trying to say that this is her fault. it’s clearly the guy who is the insane one here but it’s not debatable. he’s a shit human being. I’m just disappointed in your friend. 

he is definitely dangerous and needs to be on some kind of list. it makes me shudder that he’s out there somewhere

once again you were an amazing friend. she is so lucky to have you but please take care of yourself too

[euphoriacrossing]

So while I sit here trying to get normal balloon spawns...

I may as well write a blog. I am using a guide post on how to catch normal balloon spawns to try and get more cherry blossom recipes. Well I am only half using it.. I am camping on the beach waiting for normal balloon spawns instead of going there every 0/5 ending minute. I'll share the guide on here after this if I remember, but I already got one new cherry blossom recipe just by camping on the side of the beach that balloon spawns are coming from and ignoring the bunny day balloons, so I think this could work, too.

Anyway, now story mode is over, but I still have so, so much to do that it's not even funny. I am making it my main priority to save miles up to buy all the different paths and stuff. I think I have three left to buy so roughly 6,000 miles to earn. But saving miles means making less bells as Nook mile trips are where I made the most, I think. And now I can't take them because I have no miles/am saving miles and so I don't have the bells to pay off my house or to build a new bridge or any of the things I am saving for. But in part the fact it is harder to save bells just makes it feel like I have more to do and that is comforting in a way. I want the appeal of this game to last forever but I know my brain doesn't work like that. Still for now it's the best distraction I have and I'm grateful for it.

Having the ability to make paths is tough because it's just another million decisions to make and hope I get it right or can redo it better or whatever, so that Euphoria becomes the island I dreamed it could be. Right now I have a lot of dirt paths and I think they look okay. But I plan on redoing them someday with either custom paths or maybe just the arched tile ones... I like that path style. Still I started when I just had dirt so I just kind of kept going that way.

It looks alright, I think, especially at the entrance. I haven't finished a lot of the paths on either the right (residential) side or the left (wooded area/orchard) but I have mostly finished the center which is shops and such.

(So far I've gotten a normal balloon spawn every 5 minutes! So it works to just hang around the beach and then look for the spawns at every 0 and 5 ending minute. Edit: Aw, nope just didn't get that last one... I am probably doing something wrong then. Oops Edit2: Definitely doing something wrong. Didn't get a spawn again. Oh well I'll check the guide again once I finish this post. I am also watching for wishing stars so it won't be a total waste.. though I haven't seen any of those either. Last edit: Guide said spawns don't happen every time AND I just got another regular balloon, so maybe I'm fine? I hope I am not just wasting time.)

I am moving most of the houses before I do the paths on that side which is ANOTHER expense for sure, but after seeing a couple of my friend's islands, I knew I could make the houses probably a bit straighter and I decided I want them not quite as closer together as I want everyone to be able to have a yard. One of my friends has houses that are PIN straight and have little yards to them. I don't think I can accomplish that. But I do think I can space them out far enough to fence them in and have little yards.

So I started with the last to move in which was Marina. I put her in a space both by the beach, and by my house because even though she just moved in we're absolute besties. No but honestly, I love her. She sings like everywhere she goes and it's adorable.

I would move Beau next but I think he might stay close to where he is. Unfortunately if I have to move him a little bit I first have to move his house out of the way and then move it back because you can't move buildings just a tad, you have to find a whole new spot. This is why I had to move the whole museum to a new spot as it was slightly out of line and i couldn't just move it to where it lined up. I wish i had known this when i put things there. I didn't take care placing anything because I knew it could be moved. I only ASSUMED it could be moved a small amount as well especially since I assumed correctly that you were paying for it. But no, so oh well, now I have to come up with new spots for things, that's fine. Luckily both Nook's Cranny and the Able Sisters I got in perfect alignment with resident services like I wanted to so they're all on one straight path.

Anyway, I hope I can get it looking like i want it to. I thought that decorating it how I wanted would be the hardest because I still need to find all the furniture. But the paths might give that a run for it's money when we talk about difficulty level if you include trying to get all the houses in the right position and such.

But as hard as I've been "working" (it's definitely still fun or I wouldn't do it) I have found plenty of time for play as well. Yesterday morning I visited a friend for her KK Slider concert. I luckily have a good group of friends from a discord I'm part of and a lot of them are from other countries so they experience stuff before I do and things like that. So a bunch of us visited her for her KK concert and we did some of that...

And then things got a little wild...

Lol, it was fun. I thought for a second about the state of the world but I didn't panic thankfully. I just saw a bunch of us coming together from across the globe, some of us in quaratine, almost all of us at least ADVISED not to go out unless necessary. The world is a scary place right now, but the fact we could still come together from across the globe to be silly and enjoy a game together makes me feel like everything might be alright. I mean, it would still be cool even if these things weren't going on, but the fact they are abd socialization is becoming more difficult than ever, it's cool to see an alternate means of that in action.

I can't believe I took no pictures of her super straight houses, ugh, if I go again, I will have to, they are literally perfect.

And the weirdest thing about all of this to me is how included i feel in all of this. We're all on a small AC discord together and it seems like a lot of them have maybe known each other a while. But unlike a lot of other places it doesn't feel cliquey to me. I've always been welcome to come to their islands, and they have always been very courteous when any of them have come to mine. They act as happy to see me as they do anyone else. And I've only known them a short time so it would usually feel strange to call them "friends" but it doesn't. Now obviously they could feel differently but if they do they don't show it. I am incredibly grateful to have found them. I really couldn't ask for a better group of people to play with.

I actually was invited from this tumblr. Likely after I made some kind of post about not feeling like I belonged in the AC community or something similarly emo and whiny, I'm sure. So I am surprised I was invited at all, but I am so thankful I was. It was just what i was looking for in the AC community.

(Yes! I learned cherry blossom umbrella! Balloon hunting is going fairly well considering I only had like two of the cherry blossom DIYs total before I started and now in about an hour I've doubled that.)

I do have some facebook friends and such I have play AC with, and I am also grateful for them as well of course. It has brought us closer together and I am thankful for that. I have one friend who we constantly send each other gifts like if we accidentally got two of something or a DIY we already have or just if we think something is cool, it's really fun. I enjoy mail as much in game as I do in real life.

But yeah, I was nervous when this game first came out that I would be stuck playing just with my sister. And don't get me wrong I love playing the game with her, we always have a good time. But sometimes you need socialization beyond your own family and I really saw this as my one chance to connect since I'm not very social, I am very anxious, and I just struggle with these things. I may have been right about it being my best chance at connection because I can hide a lot of the awkwardness in game. Very thankfully though, I found people who accept what I can't hide in game. And who accept me. For some reason that's just been really hard to do. Every community I am a part of I feel like an outsider until now. But yeah, I am looking forward to a continued friendship with these people and continuing to enjoy the game moving forward.

I guess I've rambled enough. I still need to get more balloons, but I can't write here forever. Though... I frequently do write far too much here and I wonder if it get read. If it doesn't I don't blame ya. But yeah. I will leave you with this adorable pic I took while Marina was singing... you can't really tell she was singing, but still, she's adorable either way.

(And don't you love this dress? I have it in I think 4 different colors, I just love it.)

[sadboisblog-blog]

I hate that every time I look at you I fall in love again. I close my eyes so I can see your face again. every time I tell myself that I will quit you I fall back. when I think of you my heart hurts. its been years but you still wander in my mind. I know that you will always have a special place in my heart, and I wouldn't be able to let you go or get over you. why do you have control over me the way you do. play me and I act the fool. I've just been missing you. there's no other way to say it. why did I fall back, I was doing too well. I'm addicted and I can't get enough. I need my fix of your love, your attention, your sadness, your history, I need my fix of you. I can't even believe that just one split second of you gets my heart beating faster, I'm happier, and I forget all about the other guys. it's just crazy what you do to me that no one has ever before. there have been close calls, but I'm not intoxicated by anyone else but you. you give me that high I need. it's ironic because your fix is drugs, I guess my high was never high enough for you. we both have one thing in common, we’ve been chasing you and trying to get to know you better. the difference is you didn't want me to find out. shut me out. all these emotions coming back again. you bring me such pain but make me happy too. I just can't get over you. 

I fucked up, hit you up and now I'm in my feels. I hate you I love you, I don't know whats real. I'm just caught up in my emotions, you took me out of my angry place you made me soft. tell me why when I look at you the feelings are lost. you're a hollow man. an empty soul. you didn't feel happiness unless you sparked the bowl. miss me kiss me leave me here to die. I loved you, you left me, you left me here to cry. when I look at you your eyes remain dry. your jaw, your lips the scenery and the pics. all remind me of the guy who liked other chicks. your hair your eyes the ones I look into pull me in deeper than I ever want to. why can't you love me why do I cry when all you ever did was hide and lie. your emotions I want you to share it. I ask you to tell me you say you cannot bear it. you are a sad boi, and I am too. I guess my biggest mistake was falling for you. rides downtown wind in my hair, empty conversations all I did was stare. caught up in your emotions you found it difficult to express. it wasn't your difficulty it was just me you didn't trust. this pain in my heart I cannot bare. when I needed you most you were not there, birthdays holidays, days when I felt low. absent, caught up in your own feelings. talking to girls just to find meaning. all this pain and emotion you caused me to suffer. but every little thing you said me too I can still remember. I reminisce missing your presence. do you miss me or do you not. where is the effort you put in me that you would put in thots? maybe you don't want someone to love you that's not my problem. I was head over heels for another guy but my feelings for you, he could not solve them. hes perfect on paper, great person inside in out. he just doesn't give me the same feelings that i lye awake thinking about. why are you like this beautiful soul, you intrigue me but in my heart i know. you are not the one, you cant be. when i look at you now all you are is empty. drugs alcohol filling upp your brain, everything you feel is superficial i cannot give you sympathy. you burned out youre wasted. still the best damn boy i tasted. i still love you, my feelings for you i can never erase. i fell hard and deep for you, you never needed to drink a chase. i cant be friends with you i know i cant. everytime i look at you i fall back. straight up admiring, your beautiful features and why you arent smiling. you act different when its just me and you, to others you like theres something you have to prove. i understand you, i get you or do i see a fake side to you and they see the real you. you pick and choose. caught up in this sadness i cannot live on. i just realized i neeed to get over my feelings to grow and be strong. no more hiding no more self-crying. I need help. im tired of not having a fear of dying 

i want to hold you in my arms again. thats all i need. 

for me to be the one for you, and you be the one for me.