#that's literally what makes it interesting like calm down it's okay if violet is pissed and scared and behaves accordingly

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?

I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.

Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.

Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.

Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.

Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.

Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.

If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.

So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.

[artificialqueens]

To New Hytes (Group fic) 3/? - Mac

AN: Again, bless Meggie for betaing this! I literally could not do any of this without her. She is a literal angel.

Summary: Vanessa is pissed, Brooke doesn’t care, Kameron is most probably falling in love, and Trixie meets an interesting woman at the bar.

Vanessa looked out the window to the bus and observed the passing greenery. There was a strange sort of calm she always got when travelling that made the passing trees look friendly.

The other passengers did not have this same sense of calm, however. Specifically, Scarlet.

The young stage manager was anxiously looking around the bus, knee bouncing up and down so aggressively that Yvie had to place her hand on Scarlet’s leg at least four times during the trip. The older girl finally gave up after the fifth time and threw her own legs into her girlfriend’s lap to stop the bouncing.

Scarlet gave her an apologetic smile but Yvie reassured her it was fine with a small peck.

Vanessa groaned in the seat across from them.

“You two are disgustin’.”

“They’re always like that, get used to it, chica,” A’keria spoke up from beside Vanessa, without looking up from her book.

Trixie popped up from the back of the bus to yell over to them. “Do you guys remember when we were in Stockholm and they got caught-”

“Okay, okay. Enough! We get it!” Scarlet interrupted, face flushed all of a sudden.

Vanessa turned back to A’keria who rolled her eyes at Scarlet and Yvie’s PDA.

“How’d that happen?” Vanessa whispered, tilting her head in the direction of the young couple.

“Honestly, I’m not really sure,” A’keria admitted, finally pulling her attention away from the book in her lap. “For as long as I’d known Scarlet, she didn’t look twice at anyone who was interested in her. Then one day Yvie and her started talking. It was weird cause all the sudden they both started acting like middle schoolers.” A’keria motioned to the couple in question as if to say ‘see what I mean,’ before continuing. “Scarlet softened almost overnight and started talking to the rest of us like we were people finally, and Yvie has had that dumb smile on her face ever since.”

“They seem like polar opposites.”

“They do, don’t they? That’s the weird thing too.” A’keria shrugged. “But they work real well together. And for all the grief we give ‘em, they make each other better.”

Vanessa hummed.

Satisfied with her answer for now, Vanessa chanced a look around the bus, taking in the faces of her fellow dancers.

A row ahead of her, Nina and Monet were putting the final touches on the promo video for the North American tour. Call it last minute, call it procrastination, call it lazy, Vanessa had noted that Nina and Monet did their best work when under a time crunch. They were giggling and joking like they were the only two people in the world.

A few rows back, Trixie and Blair were talking animatedly about something or another. Blair was rifling through notebook after notebook to Trixie’s repeated squeals of joy.

Violet sat in the very back with the girls from the burlesque number - Dela and Jinkx were their names from what Vanessa could remember - they sat squashed between a few crew members. They all chatted like old friends while Violet scrolled through her phone looking bored out of her skull - so her usual look.

Brooke and Kameron sat in the front looking out the windows and whispering with small smiles on their faces.

It was weird seeing Brooke so calm. Nerves not eating at her, stress not making her snap. She and Kameron looked at peace with each other. It made something settle in Vanessa’s stomach, something… decidedly not pleasant.

Brooke glanced over at her and caught her staring. Vanessa blushed. She fucking blushedand Brooke shot her a smirk before turning back to her conversation. Kameron gave Brooke a knowing smile and rolled her eyes.

Vanessa was fucked.

…

Kameron placed the last piece of equipment in the truck.

She turned back to the now empty theatre; most of the crew members had turned in for the night after Kameron assured them that she had it handled.

This was Kameron’s favorite part of the job. When the theatre was empty, the adrenaline humm in the air was still present, but less intense. It was like a warm blanket wrapped around shoulders that made her feel like anything was possible.

It was also two thirty in the morning. The added sleep deprivation might have also played a part in the feeling.

She made her way back into the theatre, checking to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything.

She looked out at the now empty audience. The urge she always got when standing on a stage was brought back. It gnawed at her gut like a hunger from which she would never be full.

She sighed in and out and looked left and right, even though she knew no one was around. Fine. Fine, she said to the urge. Just once.

Kameron took center stage, ignored the unrelenting nerves and let herself breathe, finally. She hadn’t danced in almost two years. She didn’t know if she could still do it.

Who was she kidding? Of course she could still do it.

She let herself breathe, filled her lungs with air that felt like long nights and early mornings in a studio she didn’t own.

In and out.

Then, she let go.

She let years of fear and nerves and holding herself back disappear like they never existed.

She let her body find its rhythm. She turned and dipped and moved like she didn’t let two years of fear keep her from doing this thing she loved. Kameron brought her arms up to float beside her. They found their timing. It took a moment, but they found their timing.

She let her head slow down and her body take over. The music that was always playing in her mind came to a crescendo. She let it happen.

And when it was over, she let herself come to a stop. She breathed in and out heavily and tried to keep from smiling like an idiot.

She failed.

A soft clapping from behind her jolted Kameron out of her head. Blair was standing on the side of the stage looking at her like she was a vision. Like she was beautiful. Like she still has it.

Kameron felt so incredibly powerful and scared shitless at the same time.

She blushed but mimed a bow, making Blair giggle.

“You didn’t tell me you were a dancer!”

Kameron walked over to her slowly stumbling over her words and trying to keep from stumbling her feet. “I’m not. Well, not anymore.”

“Coulda fooled me,” Blair teased.

Kameron smiled.

Blair smiled back.

“You’re a little late ya know, you gotta wait for a real audience next time.”

“You are a real audience.” Kameron’s mind spoke before she could stop it.

Blair blushed but hesitated a moment before speaking. “Why don’t you-”

“The limelight isn’t really my thing.”

Blair gave her a knowing smile. “Now you’re the one lyin’ to me.”

Kameron bit her lip at her own words echoed back at her.

She sighed.

“You don’t gotta tell me if ya don’t want to,” Blair quickly reassured. “I just… I think you’re real good. That’s all. Didn’t mean to overstep.”

Kameron tried to placate her, while at the same time not giving too much away.“You didn’t. It’s just… not a pretty story.”

“You think just cause I make pretty things I can’t handle a little ugly?”

“No, I just mean-”

Blair cut her off gently. “I know what you mean, Kameron. It’s okay. You don’t gotta tell me yet.”

Kameron wanted to. God, she really wanted to. She had no idea why, but she trusted Blair implicitly. Maybe it was the young girl’s openness at their first meeting. Or maybe it was how kind her eyes looked. Maybe it was because Kameron was assuredly falling in love with her.

“One day, I will. I promise,” Kameron spoke softly.

“One day,” Blair echoed.

…

Vanessa was pissed.

It had been almost a month since she joined the company and she hadn’t performed once with them.

She had her number all prepared.

Actually, her number was more than prepared. It was technically perfect.

She had been so hell-bent on getting it right that Vanessa recruited Alyssa to work with her after hours. Vanessa had spent hours upon hours perfecting her craft, not including the additional hours when she rehearsed with the other girls.

And still, she wasn’t allowed to perform.

Vanessa was pissed.

Vanessa stormed up to the nearest dancer, all flames and Puerto Rican spitfire. “Where’s the boss?” she demanded.

“She’s somewhere back there.” Violet barely looked up from inspecting her nails and waved her hand dismissively to the backstage of the theatre they were performing at tonight.

Vanessa took off in the vague direction Violet gave. She wandered around for a few moments before spotting the ridiculously tall ballerina in the corner on her phone.

Vanessa set her jaw and stormed up to Brooke.

“What gives?”

Brooke looked up from her phone and gave Vanessa a once over. “What do you want, Mateo?”

“You brought me on, make me work my ass off every day of my life but still won’t let me perform.”

“You aren’t ready,” Brooke answered simply.

“The fuck you mean I’m not ready? I been doin’ the damn work.”

Brooke tucked her phone in her pocket. Vanessa now had her full attention. It was almost too intense to be on the receiving end of the unyielding stare.

Brooke took a few steps forward, crowding into Vanessa’s space.

Vanessa didn’t back down, no matter how much she wanted to cower.

“You. Aren’t. Ready.” Brooke punctuated each word with a step forward.

They were inches apart now, tiptoeing ever closer to the line they had drawn on day one. It was equal parts exhilarating and scary.

“You’re wrong.” Vanessa cursed her voice for breaking.

“I’m never wrong.” Brooke answered cooly, as she took another step impossiblycloser. “But maybe this is a first. Maybe bringing you on was a mistake.” Brooke looked up to the ceiling like she was thinking for a moment, like she was genuinely considering firing Vanessa. The next second, Brooke’s eyes were burning holes into Vanessa’s own. “Was it?”

“No,” Vanessa whispered.

Brooke pressed her luck. “No, what?”

Fuck

“No, mami.”

Brooke gave a huge smirk.

Checkmate.

Brooke tucked a piece of Vanesa’s hair behind her ear. “Next time I see you, your hair better be pulled back.” The gentle gesture was perverted by Brooke’s tone. Commanding and stern, but with an edge of… something else. “I have rules, or did you forget already?”

I have rules.

Brooke said I. Not we. Not the company. Brooke.

Brooke had rules.

Vanessa watched, mouth agape, stomach still somersaulting, as Brooke turned on her heel and left without another word.

…

Trixie didn’t like going out.

So, when Violet and A’keria drag their fellow performers and crew members out to a local bar to ‘let loose’ Trixie planned on calling it an early night and curling up in her hotel room with some Netflix and shitty hotel food.

But it was A’keria’s birthday, and she insisted that everyone adhere to her every whim. She had practically pulled Trixie out of her room and all the way to the Uber.

Trixie resigned herself to the bar for the night and sipped her drink for a while, aimlessly searching the room for anything interesting.

She noticed Nina and Brooke on the dance floor chatting loudly over the music. They were giggling like children and hanging off each other in a way that betrayed their ‘just friends’ label.

Vanessa was standing by the far wall with Kameron, finding any excuse to touch up on her arms.

Monet was sat next to Trixie staring none too subtly at Nina and Brooke.

A’keria and Violet were chatting with their latest conquests. Trixie rolled her eyes at the poor girls who had fallen into their trap.

Trixie got so lost in her own head she hardly noticed the young blonde sliding up next to her.

A thick Russian accent accompanied the woman’s presence. “Friends dragged you out too?”

Trixie turned her head to look at the woman. She was dressed…eccentrically. That was the only word that really encaptured the woman. She had on a t-shirt dress covered in bright red rhinestones with her hair in a style that resembled braided space buns, but if you looked close enough, it just looked to be a tangled mess. Her knee high boots and hand earrings completed the odd look.

“How’d you figure that one?”

“It’s the only reason such a pretty girl would be looking anywhere but at me,” the stranger replied with a wink.

Trixie laughed.

So eccentric and cocky. The stranger was beautiful, Trixie gave her that. She was that kind of weird beauty that took a second to sink it. But it did sink in.

“Gotta lot of confidence for such a plain Jane,” Trixie shot back.

“Oh, baby, there ain’t nothin’ plain about me.” The stranger had suddenly lost her Russian accent, causing Trixie to do a double take.

The stranger just laughed.

Trixie tried to not let it phase her, and kept her tone light and teasing. “You’re telling me. I mean, who wears that to a club?” Trixie nodded in the direction of the stranger’s attire.

The stranger suddenly got very sullen and cast her eyes downwards. “It was my babushka’s.” The stranger spoke softly now. “She passed recently. This was her favorite outfit.”

“Oh, fuck-”

“Katya,” the stranger interrupted, through sniffles.

“Katya, I’m so sorry.”

The stranger - Katya - turned away from Trixie and the young girl could only make out her shoulders shaking in the dim bar light.

Great fucking job, Trixie, you finally get the guts to talk to a girl and she’s now crying.

It took an embarrassingly long time for Trixie to realize that Katya was not actually crying, but laughing.

“I’m messing with you, myshka!” Katya said through giggles as she turned back around in her chair to meet Trixie’s eyes.

The younger girl punched her in the arm, her face tried to conjure up a look of anger, but settled on bemusement. “That’s not funny! You can’t do that to people!”

Trixie should have been mad… or weirded out at the least. She wasn’t. She was…intrigued.

“Well, you aren’t just people, now are you?” The flirty tone and lack of accent were back with full force again.

Trixie felt like she had whiplash.

“What makes you say that?”

“I have a knack for spotting interesting people.”

“Oh really?” Katya nodded. “Anyone else interesting here, besides yours truly of course.”

“Of course,” Katya echoed with a predatory smile. “Well, you see that short one in the corner over there? The one touching up on that absolute beefcake of a woman?”

“Her name is Vanessa.” Trixie interjects.

“Ahhh, Vanessa. Makes sense.”

“Does it?”

“Hmmm, yes, she was a knight in a past life.” At Trixie’s confused laugh, Katya explained, “Did I fail to mention I’m also a psychic?”

“You seem to be failing to mention a lot of things.”

“Ahh, yes, such is the fault of a genius, I’m afraid.” Katya pointed to her own head, and Trixie laughed again.

In a rare moment of vulnerability, Trixie’s mouth spoke before her brain could process. “You are by far the most interesting person I’ve ever met.”

Katya didn’t miss a beat. “Wait till you meet my grandmother!”

Trixie laughed, a full bellied one that left her straining to catch her breath. She didn’t. Or she couldn’t. At least not until later.

She and Katya talked for what felt like hours, but was probably only minutes. The banter was easy and fun. Light and sexy at the same time that it was deep and meaningful.

Trixie would have been content to sit at the bar all night and day hearing Katya talk. Her accent harsh, but her words soft as they spoke about the places she’d been or the people she’d loved.

It was the kind of immediate connection you felt with a person. Almost like your whole life had been leading up to this one interaction. Or maybe that was just Trixie’s romanticism getting the best of her.

Because only a few moments later, their little bubble was burst by Dela grabbing Trixie’s arm to pull her attention and whispering that they had to get back to the hotel now. Something about Nina needing to be taken care of.

Trixie looked over to see that yes, Nina did in fact need some assistance. She was practically hanging off Brooke for stability and stumbling around the room, running into people left and right. At one point, she even leant up to kiss Brooke on the forehead. That was the point at which Trixie knew she was needed.

Trixie shot Katya an apologetic look before getting up to help her friend. Katya stopped her with a hand to her wrist.

The enigmatic woman reached over the bar, much to the chagrin of the bartender, to knick a pen. She left her phone number in swooping numbers and a little heart with an arrow through it on Trixie’s wrist.

The younger girl tried to not swoon at the sight.

She left Katya with a wink and a promise to text her before being dragged out of the bar to the cool night air.

As soon as she got the chance, Trixie saved the contact in her phone with an emoji of a heart with an arrow through it.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Episode 4: Take Us Back except I’M DEAD INSIDE [Despair Route]

Episode 4: Take Us Back I’M DEAD INSIDE [Despair Route]

..............No.

Just

No.

To everything. 

I’m still fuming after episode 3. 

Where the fuck did James go, anyway? Did he fly off the boat? 

Welp, the big Lilly scene. Let’s see what all the hype is about.

oh okay

I’ll just forget about the fact that you kidnapped my boyfriend and friends after murdering my best friend Mitch, then proceeded to cut out my boyfriend's tongue, cut off Violet’s finger, then murdered James. 

Let bygones be bygones.

No Lilly

You ARE evil.

What you did was evil. And if I weren’t on the despair route, I would’ve shot you in your lying fucking ratass face. 

AAAAAAAND it’s over. 

I’m am so happy that letting James die amounted to a two-second conversation with Lilly. So. Worth. It. 

Oh wait

NO IT’S FUCKING NOT

ARE YOU JOKING

DO YOU THINK ME A FOOL??

I knew it was bad. I knew letting Lilly live didn’t mean shit. Now she gets to flow down the river and live the rest of her life doing who the fuck knows. 

Hell, I bet she DOES run into David and live a happy little life with all her livid children.

Because at this point, why not.

What I said: “I hope you find peace, Lilly.”

What I meant: “I HOPE YOU CATCH ON FIRE AND BURN TO DEATH BUT THE DAMAGE DOESN’T REACH YOUR BRAIN SO YOU STILL TURN INTO A WALKER AND LIVE THE REST OF ETERNITY STUCK BETWEEN A HELL OF LIFE AND DEATH.”

BITCH

I fucking askdjaksjdalksjdlkajsdlkaaaaaaaaaaa-

The opening credits haven’t even opened and I’m already this pissed off. 

I know it probably wasn’t in the budget or they didn’t have time to give us something substantial with letting Lilly live but fucking hell. If I have to sacrifice James, at least let me have a real final battle with Lilly. Let me have the option to bash her head in with a saltlick. Give me something! 

AAAAAAAAHHDHDJLKSJLKJSLKSJSLK

......

Louis just..... makes me want to cry.

I’m serious, I have never felt so awful looking at Louis and knowing what I did to him. 

The number of pictures of Louis smiling and being cute that I’m going to have to look at to cope with this nonsense jfc.....

...

....Really.

That’s it, Vi?

“Lou...”

That’s ALL you have to say.

I

You

Not even a hug. Nothing. Nope, we gotta talk about Minerva some more because clearly, she’s so much more important.

 Fuck Minerva, Violet!

 Again, if she were fully in character, she would’ve hugged Louis and not given a shit about Minerva. 

AND YOU’RE STILL CONCERNED ABOUT HER

“What the fuck is she doing? She’s going to get herself killed!”

VIOLET

THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY TIMES I CAN SCREAM AT YOU TO FORGET ABOUT MINERVA

oh huh

Louis is still the one to fall over in the cart

Don’t know why I find that interesting but I do?

Aw fuck

I don’t get to see him again until the ending. 

Well that’s just.... depressing. 

Have I mentioned how much I hate this route?

wtf has Tenn’s voice always been this deep? Why am I just noticing this now?

Thanks. I hate it. 

Okay. Okay okay okay. 

I will give it this. 

I like the scene with Clementine and AJ. With James dead, and with the choices I’ve made up to this point, it has a way more serious, almost quiet tone to it. With James, it’s all anger and panic when he tries to take AJ away, but here...... I don’t know. With James I’ve gotten to the point where the cave scene is so wild that I can do nothing but laugh all “Yeah, yeah, James, calm your shit and quit pacing, you look foolish.”

But here.... This choice:

Is suddenly more heartbreaking now that I have to basically ruin AJ’s confidence in himself after he opened up to Clem in a way he never has before. In my eyes, this is just.... such a negative impact on their relationship. I mean, I get it. No one wants AJ to be a killer, or to like killing or whatever but.... still. 

And, on top of that, this choice cements Violet’s fate and I hate that. 

This whole route fucks Violet over in every way possible. Not only do I romance Louis and spend all my time with him, but the only reason I saved her was so that Louis won’t die in the end. Then, I let Ey Yo cut her finger off, she went through all that stupid nonsense with Minerva, and how she’s going to die to save Tenn’s life. 

Fuck everything about this. 

The being said... I fucking miss Louis. 

“I like Aasim.” 

Hahahahaha okay, the way AJ said that made me laugh.

Hi Violet........... 

Also, funny how Tenn also runs up to hug Violet but he doesn’t do that with Louis. I know he and Violet are way closer, so it makes sense, but with Louis he’s just “Oh it’s just Louis.... Guess I’ll join in the hug, too.” Hahaha 

What’s less funny is how Violet doesn’t say shit about Louis. 

Louis at least mentions that Violet’s eyes aren’t infected but Violet’s just got.... nothing. I want to know how he’s doing. Ugh. 

I don’t blame Violet for this, I blame the writing. Because AGAIN. If she were kept in character, she would’ve mentioned him. 

Hell, CLEMENTINE should’ve asked because, y’know, he’s kind of her boyfriend??? 

But what do I know. 

I don’t know nothin’ about these characters. 

God, I miss Louis. 

Well, at least Violet knows she was an idiot about Minerva. 

PFFFFTT-

“Welcome to Happy Sunshine Land! Here’s Mayor Violet!”

“NO I HATE IT”

Oh Vi...... managing to make me laugh seconds before chaos erupts...

Oh fuck

oh fuck

oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck

nope

nope 

nope nope nope nope

....

....

....

That

I fucking loathe that. 

Seeing and hearing it.

I had to take a break and come back to this. I’m sorry, but that is just so wrong. It’s wrong! I love you Tenn, and damn it, you’re ending better blow my fucking mind after having to sacrifice Violet to see it but.... No. 

Violet shouldn’t be the one who died on the bridge. 

It’s not even a long scene, but it fucking feels like it is. 

They rip Violet apart and going back to look at it, she’s still fighting them as she falls and they just cover her. 

Fuck Minerva. 

I have nothing for her. 

I hope in whatever afterlife there is, Violet kicks her ass all the way down to the fiery pits of hell. 

And Clementine just..... Sad face for two seconds and then we’re off. 

We don’t even really mourn her. We mourn Tenn for a moment when AJ’s shoots him, but Violet’s dead and Tenn’s in shock and AJ slaps him, says Violet died for him, and they go.

I fucking-

ugh

UGH

And Clem’s bit

I hate everything

However, one thing that I DON’T hate is playing as AJ. I LOVE playing as AJ during the barn scene. 

I had to take another break after the flashback scene. I still can’t believe I’ve watched both of those Clementine and AJ scenes over a hundred times and it still manages to make me tear up every time I go back to play. 

Now that I’ve calmed down a bit, let’s see what this ending has to offer. 

CROSS THAT HEART SHIT OUT

Violet deserved so much more than Minerva. 

...Wait.

Tenn never made it back to the school?

Okay, I get it. So, basically, he was ashamed after what happened and went back to find Violet and Minerva. I like how he realizes how “naive” he’s been throughout this whole thing and that he doesn’t want to be the reason someone dies again, that he wants AJ to teach him everything he knows. Which, in my personal opinion, is the right answer. Telling him to keep being an artist without learning from his mistakes, without teaching him better and smarter ways of survival just lets Violet die in vain. 

I’m also thankful that they didn’t make me see Violet as a walker. I mean, fuck everything about her death but... I would’ve flipped my shit again if I had to see that. 

RUBY

Oh Take Us Back..... why ya tryin’ to make me cry again....

Ruby and Aasim are holding hands and the small bit of hope makes me feel a little bit better. 

LOOK AT HIM

My beautiful boy........

I am never ever doing another playthrough without romancing and saving Louis ever again.

Even now that we’re into the “happy” ending, it still feels wrong. 

Still annoyed that nothing is said about Violet. 

Nothing. 

“It’s been a week tho they’ve already mourned her blah blah blah” I don’t fucking care.

Louis....

Louis places the note on the table so gently.....

Okay. The clouis scene is cute. It’s really cute. But it doesn’t make up for all the shit I had to do to get it myself. 

BUT... I won’t get into too much because I’ve made posts about this, but I don’t like how happy and neatly wrapped up everything’s portrayed as. I want a real reaction out of Louis- who, btw has now lost two of his best friends, has been shot, was kidnapped, was traumatized after having his tongue cut out, who will never talk again and will never sing again, and saw his girlfriend come back to the school without her leg after being bitten and on the brink of death, and thought Tenn was dead on top of all that- rather than............... happy. 

I still love the scene, but if you asked me when this takes place without any context, I would’ve told you a year at the least. 

...

I’m not gonna lie: I’m a fucking mess. 

I don’t know if I can say that I hate this ending, because really, it’s the same ending with a few changes. 

But I hate that Violet is dead. I hate what happened to Louis. I hate that I had to sacrifice Violet [and in a way Louis] in order for Tenn to live. I hate that James is dead. I FUCKING HATE THAT LILLY IS ALIVE OUT THERE. 

In conclusion: FUCK ALMOST EVERYTHING ABOUT THE DESPAIR ROUTE

The Good: I got to see scenes and interactions I never have before. It was cool hanging out with Violet for once. She made me laugh a couple times. Tenn’s ending is good. The cute clouis scene with the note is sweet.

The Bad: Literally everything else. Fuck letting Louis get captured, fuck letting Lilly live, fuck letting James and Violet die. Fuck not trusting AJ and adding damage to the relationship between him and Clementine. FUCK THE BOAT SCENE OF VIOLET CARING MORE FOR MINERVA THAN LOUIS. FUCK NOT GETTING TO SMOOCH AND SEE MY BOY’S FACE. FUCK LILLY, FUCK MINERVA, FUCK THIS ROUTE.

Again, I... don’t have any real words for the feelings this route brought me. 

Just.... mad. 

I’m mad. And sad. And dead.

I just need a minute to stop being dead inside.

I’m gonna need to read so much fluff after this jfc....