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#that's the whole family folks! the bingo card is full!
ereborne · 1 year
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This morning, Nick asked for a pencil--I pulled one out of my hair for him. 
Later, Lily asked for a bookmark--I pulled one out of my hair for her. 
Later, Duncan asked if anybody had a spare hairtie--I made him cup his two hands together, filled his hands with all the things currently in my hair, took the scrunchie out of my hair, twisted my hair back up and anchored it with pencils, put all my stuff back in it, and gave him the scrunchie. 
Later, Mom asked for a permanent marker--I pulled one out of my hair for her. 
Later, Ben said he was feeling snacky, did anybody have anything to eat.  I do not, I must admit, actually keep food in my hair.  But I did have novelty kitkats in my pocket, and I did get bored the other day and spend a little time on my sleight of hand. 
I pulled one, two, three kitkats out of my hair for him. 
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taegimood · 4 months
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i need to see a situation where u accidentally call taehyun daddy infront of ur parents LIKE i need to see this written by u
LMAO PLS DKDJDKDKEMJ this would be the worst one because he’s just so daddy coded and YOU would be the one wanting to sink into a hole. i can imagine you guys visiting your parent’s house for a family dinner (not even in public where at least you can escape 😔) and maybe you’ve had a little too much wine or whatever your drink of choice is, because your lips are a LOT looser than usual right now as you’re giggling and talking and playing footsie with your boyfriend who sits across the table from you. the evening has been coming to a close and it’s getting late when your mom mentions the time, and taehyun agrees with a “we should head out, y/n.” however, you become a bit of a brat when you drink, which he knows all too well — yet what comes out of your mouth is not what he expected to hear on this fine evening with the fine people who raised you.
“daddy, no!”
silence. your mom’s fork clinking to a stop. taehyun’s even stare, brows quirked, the tiniest hint of a smirk threatening the corners of his lips which he smoothly hides. your dad coughs.
there it is, folks; that yearning for the sweet embrace of death as you slowly drag your eyes away from your boyfriend’s and onto your slightly mortified, slightly confused parents. let’s just say it was a quick and awkward cleanup after that, with an even quicker, even more awkward exit. giving your family a showcase into your sex life wasn’t exactly on anyone’s bingo card for the night, and it’s when you arrive home after whining and shrieking about it the whole ride back in the car, that taehyun starts to laugh. full-on laugh. “you know that i’d normally punish you for your back-talk, princess.. but i think you already handled that part yourself.”
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justatouchjaded · 8 months
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Send 👌 if you would like to explore a PLATONIC relationship between our muses!Send 😎 if you would like to explore a FAMILIAL relationship between our muses!Send ❤️ if you would like to explore a ROMANTIC relationship between our muses!Send 💋 if you would like to explore a SEXUAL relationship between our muses!Send 💥 if you would like to explore a ANTAGONISTIC relationship between our muses!
I just wanna write w u more 😳
Sdflkdshgdsf I’m flattered <3 <3 I’d really like to write more with you, too! :D
…And I’m looking forward to having the free time & energy to do so fffff
Took the opportunity to brainstorm a bit! And share extra info that hopefully might help spark ideas on your own end. ^_^
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General Thoughts
Platonic
Somewhat my default, or at least by far and away what I have the most experience with. Too broad to really have much useful to say here. :’D
Though I do feel it’s worth calling out: Diamond is all for queerplatonic relationships, platonic life partnerships, etc.
Even short of those dynamics, his friendships tend to be queer in undefined ways! He just. Has very little truck with relationship norms in general sldkfhsdg.
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Familial
ALRIGHT SO. Diamond will unofficially adopt people left and right, whether it’s a good idea or not. Send him someone under 30 who could use his support and we’re in business sdlfdshgdkf.
He is also an Actual Foster Parent or adoptive parent semi-regularly, so if you have a muse in the system where you want to go that route, that’s entirely plausible! Or like, AUs where it might happen for political or magic reasons, that could potentially be interesting.
On the other end of things, I have also definitely been interested in trying more threads with Diamond as a child of late. Just… massive potential for several different strange dynamics that I think could be v. fun! (Maybe he’s the one getting adopted?)
ALSO. Definitely open for potentially plotting blood relations as well? Like, either inserting one of his incarnations somewhere in any of your muses’ family trees — uncle? cousin? nephew? — or some kind of stronger AU. (I have not fleshed out his Martian family at all. So. First life is a possibility! Or full AUs where Diamond is more mundane and not immortal, hah.)
(I also think he’d be simultaneously a Pain In The Ass while also v. supportive in sibling dynamics…)
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Romantic and/or Sexual
Diamond will have casual flings with physical age peers! But for actual more deeply involved partnerships, he definitely tends to gravitate to older folk. (Whether that’s just normal meaning of older, or fellow immortals.)
Which isn’t to say that he never gets more involved with young adults; if he were going to be too paranoid about shit he’d almost never date at all, and he figures that at some point he just has to trust his own intentions & the other person’s judgement. (Or remove himself from the situation when he doesn’t.)
But it is definitely less likely. You kind of have to manage to dodge the caretaking impulses first for it to even come up, hah.
Threads in his first life and AUs without the whole reincarnation thing are also definitely a possibility. 👀
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Antagonistic
In theory I am interested. In practice this does not come naturally to me and I suspect I’d need to follow your lead to get very far. 😂
Diamond can be snippy, bossy, arrogant, and even a bit petty at times, so there is fodder! Off the top of my head I feel like Professional Rivalry or Practical Conflict might be most promising? Some practical reason for our muses to be at odds.
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Muse-Specific Notions
Sofi: Seriously based on the bingo card you sent I do think they could have such fun interactions. :D Good potential queerplatonic vibes I think? (…assuming they managed to dodge Diamond irretrievably pissing Sofi off via his ingrained Authority Figure vibes, or Diamond giving up on Sofi in exasperation. 😂 Though honestly those routes could be interesting too…)
Amanita: Strikes me as potentially viable for either non-platonic shipping or antagonism depending on circumstances sdlfkdshg. (Or. Both at the same time?? Both is good. Again, depending on circumstances. xD)
Xander: So. Diamond likes rock music. 👀 And while he kind of hates the hustle of the life of being a professional musician (outside of occasionally going into music teaching), he absolutely likes to support them when he can…
Cyrus: My brain says supportive queer disabled mentor has potential? I feel like Cyrus could use someone in his life who thoroughly understands the Shittiness of Circumstances while also being able to say with full confidence and personal experience that it can get better. <3
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Those are just the ones that come to mind for now! I definitely don’t know much about all your muses yet, and if you have any further notions I’d love to hear them. :D
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itsclydebitches · 4 years
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RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Divide”
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Hello, everyone, and welcome back! It feels good to be doing some normal RWBY-ing in this strange world of ours. First, some supplementary materials.
Number One: In response to any (valid) questions along the lines of, “Hey Clyde, it’s now been a full year since Volume 7 was airing and you still haven’t answered my ask about it. Or the ones about Volume 6… what’s up with that?” I’ve created what I hope is an informative video detailing the problem:
vimeo
(I assure you, the Earth, Wind & Fire was a happy accident during the screen recording.)
Needless to say, there’s a lot and I’ve known for some time now that I will LITERALLY never get through all my asks. Which doesn’t mean I don’t want you to send future thoughts in! Just know that as we head into Volume 8 territory I’ll most likely prioritize those, as well as any Volume 7 asks that aren’t woefully out of date. But I do want everyone to know that I read all the asks I receive, appreciate them immensely, and think too much about hypothetical answers, even if I don’t have time to actually write them out 💜
Number Two: There’s a bingo board this year!
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Jury’s out on whether I’ll remember to update it, but at the very least this serves as a decent glimpse into my — and others’ — expectations going into this volume.
Number Three: I’ve collected a list of things I’ve heard about Volume 8 from what seem to be reputable sources. I did this because RT is developing a tendency to talk up certain points and then fail to deliver, either because something was taken out of a volume/moved to another, or because RT apparently has radically different ideas about what including something means. So this might be handy to keep on file and ask ourselves two months from now, “Did RT actually deliver on what they promised?”
Emphasis on Ruby’s leadership and how Summer’s death has impacted her
Insight into Ren and Nora’s flaws
May Merigold will supposedly have a larger part
More information about The Long Memory (Ozpin’s cane)
Theme of the volume is that you can respect someone but that doesn’t necessarily mean you agree with them
Very short timeline (supposedly just two days)
Yang in particular is very suspicious and distrustful
I was also going to include a list of all the threads that need to be continued/wrapped up, but honestly that would have taken too large a chunk off my life. Let’s just throw out the highlights:
Are we really going to have Qrow gunning for Ironwood?
Clover is dead regardless. Press ‘F’ to pay respects
Oscar bb you got shot please acknowledge this
Ozpin bb you got done dirty please acknowledge this
Penny is a Maiden now. I feel like the fandom has been sleeping on this (myself included)
Queer baiting, queer baiting… you’re on thin ice at this point, RWBY. Just skate on over to the queer snack bar before you fall straight into the lake.  
Ren spill your deep dark secret already and it had better be something more than just ‘Oh no Nora might someday die :( ’
Salem is here so how the actual fuck is the cast surviving this?
Will Ironwood likewise survive his descent into antagonism? Yes or please yes no?
I think that’s all the biggies. I strive to keep lists like this in mind while analyzing, but honestly RWBY has a hundred moving parts that are abandoned or changed or simply retconned at the drop of a hat. So an attempt will be made.
Number Four (last one I promise!): Normal disclaimers and reminders for Recaps apply:
Please don’t fill up the already full inbox with flames. It’s still 2020. No one has time for that nonsense.
There will absolutely be typos and wonky parts because I try to get these out the same day an episode premieres. I have now been working on this for ten hours, nearly straight, and have no more energy for edits. Apologies in advance and RIP to my Saturdays.
I reserve the right to use stupid GIFs and memes at my discretion.
I strive to keep my focus on recapping/analyzing but salt tends to worm its way in… If you’re a die-hard RWBY fan with little patience for criticism, let alone (at times) snarky criticism, please proceed with caution.
No wait I lied, this is the last thing:
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Okay, got that out of my system LET’S DO THIS!
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We start not with the episode itself but rather Rooster Teeth’s (RT’s) strange non-promotion of it. If you follow my blog you may have caught the post where I pointed out that there was nothing on RT’s website to suggest that one of their most popular shows—if not the most popular show—was premiering today. Nothing on the main page. Nothing on the RWBY page either, not unless you count the Volume 8 poster background (easily mistaken for the Volume 7 poster) and the trailer buried all the way down past Episodes, past Merch, in the Bonus Features section along with videos like Live From Remnant and the volume intros. RT… the promotion of your feature show is not a bonus. This should be front and center! Honest to god, five minutes before the episode dropped I was checking the website for a Volume 8 section, a countdown, anything that would tell me the episode was imminent without relying on fans on tumblr to keep me in the loop. We got nada, zilch. I’m not sure whether that speaks more to RT’s iffy management of the series or simply the website’s horrible design—RIP losing RWBY on Youtube—but I was surprised when I saw the episode a few minutes after 11:00am. At that point I honestly expected to hear about a dely.
So that’s the mood I entered the premiere in, but truly? We start off strong. Things take a pretty severe nosedive later on, we’ll get to that, but I was impressed with our beginning and that probably has a lot to do with the fact that we start with our villains.
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We open on a Cinderella character, Cinder, and thus I’m immediately pleased that we’re getting something about her backstory after all this time. Seven years! She appeared in episode one, folks! To say we’re overdue is an understatement. There isn’t a whole lot to go on, just a younger Cinder sadly scrubbing the floor, poised under a spotlight. What we learn, or potentially learn, is based far more in cultural knowledge than this scene. We know Cinderella’s story, which includes the abusive family, the longing for more, the eventual escape, and thus we’re able to read all of that in this image, despite the image itself not telling us any of this overtly. That means we could be wrong in our interpretation, but if we’re not it’s an easy shorthand in an already packed story.
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What I’m really impressed with is the sound bridge between the scrubbing and her nails on the back of Neo’s chair. Fantastic way to confirm that this is Cinder as well as showcasing just how far she’s come. The sound of her labor has been replaced with the sound of her power and given that Cinder’s power is stolen, tied to a grimm arm, the property of a genocidal maniac… that’s messed up. It’s a Cinderella story gone wrong.
So yeah, Cinder tells Neo to head straight into the creepy, grimm infested blood cloud to see Salem and Neo is like, ‘Uh… no thank you?’ lol.
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RT does a good job this episode with her expressions, ensuring we know exactly what she’s thinking despite an unwillingness/inability to speak.
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Poor Neo might be in too deep, but I quite like the overall atmosphere of this opening. Say what we will about Salem’s awful characterization, at least she has style. This woman knows how to make an entrance and, piggybacking off of the Apathy, RT knows how to infuse horror elements into their fantasy. The red and purple coloring of the clouds, spiked whale teeth peeking through, bright orange in the background looking like explosions… that’s all 👌 Including the intro card.
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The only thing I want to gripe about is this:
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I’m sorry, why does the whale grimm have landing pads? Or something like it?? The whale otherwise works because it’s poised between the natural and the fantasy synthetic. It looks like a real grimm whale on the outside, but is sporting a throne room, a control panel, and other unnatural elements on the inside. It’s a visual indicator of Salem’s ability to control and change grimm. Now though, the additions are wrong, infringing on the line between organic and tech, the line between what helps the grimm individually (giving monkeys wings) and what just helps Salem. Every other aspect of the whale straddles that line wonderfully, adding to the creep factor, like a grimm version of the Uncanny Valley: it’s not quite a whale anymore… but landing pads? That looks ridiculous. Why does Salem even have that? How many ships are her people feasibly using? Why are there five?
Take it away, please.
Cinder waltzes in like this is a normal home visit, but Neo has an appropriate ‘What the actual fuck?’ face going on.
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They approach Salem on her throne where Cinder immediately kneels, greeting her with, “My queen.” I mentioned during my trailer breakdown that I think Cinder is lying her ass off here, and I still think that based on a line we’ll get in a minute, but now at least we have a sense of how she can pull this off. A woman who started out as a (presumed) servant is going to know how to mimic subservience, even if her heart isn’t in it. Salem is very good at playing the girl who will still kneel and scrub the floor for you. She will scrub the floor, she’ll do everything you want, she’ll just be plotting her own rise to power while she does it.
There’s quite a bit of interesting cinematography in this episode, not all of it good, and I think one of the mistakes is here when we get a closeup on Salem’s mouth as she greets Cinder. A closeup like that should be reserved for more significant dialogue—“Rosebud”—and yet we get this shot again when Cinder tells Emerald to be quiet. It’s awkward and coupled with the numerous eye closeups we got in the trailer, I think RT is playing a little fast and loose with the camera. Each shot should add something to the scene, not distract from it. If you don’t have a reason for including a technique like that then leave it be.
Back to the actual dialogue though. We knew that Salem knew Cinder was alive and now it seems that she just expected her to come back? I’m slightly lost. It feels like we’re missing something here. Cinder goes off to secure the lamp, fails, nearly dies, wanders on her own for months, and then randomly shows back up on Salem’s whale doorstep, yet Salem isn’t angry at all? Did she have faith that Cinder would return when she has something to offer? Did she just not care about Cinder, considering her return an unnecessary but otherwise welcome surprise? That would make the least sense given that she holds the key to accessing Beacon’s relic… but that circles right back around to why Salem is seemingly indifferent to Cinder’s comings and goings. Surely she can’t actually believe that Cinder is loyal?
“So I trust you wouldn’t return to me empty handed,” she says. Yeah, trust means nothing in this show, Salem, didn’t you watch Volumes 6 and 7? Again, I simply don’t know. I suppose I’ll just chalk it up to confidence, that if Cinder did bail Salem knew she could track her down again. Deciphering her motivations and beliefs is a lost cause when the show continually gives us so little.
The important thing now is that Cinder does indeed have an offering and you can see that Salem is somewhat surprised at being handed the relic.
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Cinder, of course, takes credit for the victory and we’re given another wonderful shot of Neo. ‘YOU took it?’
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Oh, Neo. Best get out while you still can.
Tyrian appears having obviously made his way to Salem’s ship sometime between her arrival and now. The exchange is pretty standard for this group. He insults Cinder for failing and needing this victory to make amends, talks about how any win against Ironwood says more about his lack of intelligence than her skill, and Cinder… doesn’t have a whole lot of comebacks, actually. I’d say Tyrian won that verbal spar, enhanced by a better use of the camera when we get his tail looming menacingly towards Cinder and Neo.
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He goes on to say that Watts was a “necessary sacrifice” so, uh… I’m just going to toss out the ask I answered yesterday. Based on our intro I’d say Watts is still significant to the volume—hacking Penny is my guess—but by the end? He could be in trouble.
(As a side note: I plan to analyze the intro next week. It’s just easier when it comes first.)
Tyrian also calls Neo “little one” which I just found absolutely hilarious. In an on brand creepy manner, that is. Not that Neo couldn’t kick his ass, but there’s something wonderfully chilling about having the serial killer use an endearment towards a potential victim, one that comments on her size while he’s looming.
In contrast, Cinder refers to Neo as a “valuable asset” and we get our third mood of the episode.
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Who’s going to start a Neo reaction image collection?
It’s true enough on the surface—who wouldn’t want an ally who can turn into anyone else?—but we’re still bumping up against question of why Salem needs this. She’s immortal! She has an endless army! Magic! This scene works well with a villain who needs a skillset like Neo’s to succeed, but Salem doesn’t. RT is doing a great job writing a story thus far, just not the story we’ve previously been given. This isn’t the story they set up.
This will come back up when we reach the RWBYJNOR group. Just wait.
Before that though, the gang’s all here as Emerald, Mercury, and Hazel show up, all in new outfits.
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I think I like everything except for the weird Xs on Emerald’s jacket—it’s way too distracting and frankly makes an otherwise good look ugly—and the fact that she’s showing her midriff in Atlas. Hazel doesn’t have any sleeves! Oh my god, why doesn’t anyone dress for the weather in this show?
Frankly, I found their reunion to be kind of lackluster. I mean, there was nothing wrong with it. Emerald does sound briefly excited, she does run, and it’s in character for Cinder to cut her off… it just didn’t resonate with me emotionally. I thought after two volumes of thinking she’s dead, then working through the knowledge that she’s alive, that I would feel Emerald’s shock and relief more, but I didn’t. And I’m not entirely sure why. I don’t want to level any accusations at the voice acting because frankly I know next to nothing about that skill (and from what I’ve seen it’s usually praised in the fandom), but I will say that throughout the premiere I was noticing it more than I ever have before. The lack of emotion here and some awkward deliveries later, like when Yang goes, “Ruby, there is no way Ironwood will cooperate with us” and I immediately thought, “Wow, that came out stilted.” These observations stick with me because, as said, voice acting usually isn’t on my radar. It’s not something I’ve studied or had practice analyzing. If you’d never told me that Ren or Qrow’s VA changed then after a year hiatus I literally wouldn’t notice… but there’s something about this episode that didn’t sit right. Anyone else get that sense, or was it just me?
Regardless, the arrival of our other three villains really doesn’t amount to much, though I’m happy for all the Emerald and Mercury fans who get to see them in new outfits. The focus is still on Cinder as she delivers a line indicative of her true motivations: “That power will be mine.” Yeah, she’s not loyal to Salem, she’s just power hungry. Of course, Salem immediately takes note of this and raises her hand, in another nice use of the foreground, reminding her that she hasn’t given that order.
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Cinder is shocked, angry even, but quickly covers it up with her “Without you I am nothing” line. If I caught it right I think she also calls Salem “Ma’am”? Hilarious. Again, skilled at playing the servant.
Also, before I forget, it’s worth noting that almost everything from our trailer appeared in this episode. Yeah, there are a few details like Nora attacking some tech and the group on their bikes, but on the whole we’ve already seen the majority of our promo material and will likely get most of the rest next week. It makes me both interested and nervous for what another twelve episodes are going to hold.
Salem opens her whale, or opens a portal type view in it, something that gives us a long-distance look at Atlas. I don’t know what exactly is going on here, but it’s pretty so I’ll take it.
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She also delivers the frankly badass line, “Just because you’re more valuable to me than a pawn does not make you a player.”
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She waves them all away with perfect ‘You mean nothing to me’ attitude and we sadly leave our villains.
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Sad not because I don’t love my farm boy, but because things are about to get a whole lot messier.
Oscar has made his way to a camp of civilian survivors… all of whom are just hanging out in the supposedly deadly cold. Yeah, there’s a single fire, but at least four of them aren’t anywhere near it. Three of them also aren’t wearing gloves. What was that survival rate again?
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A nice if gruff dude gives Oscar soup—water?—while showing off his… badger claws? I don’t know what kind of faunus he’s supposed to be, but he feels like the sort of two second, minor character who could easily become a meme lol.
Oscar thanks him (my polite son!) and hands the bowl back after a single sip. Which is impressive because I would have assumed the guy was giving me the whole bowl and just taken it. Hell, I’ve done that even when I didn’t assume it’s all for me. A Starbucks barista once approached me with a tray and a plate of samples, I knew I was supposed to take just one, yet for some reason my hand went to take the whole goddamn plate. He had to tell me off, then I was trying to explain that I didn’t actually want or think I should have eight shots of cappuccino all to myself, I don’t even like coffee, he clearly didn’t believe me… it was awkward. So good job, Oscar. You’re less awkward than me (though that’s not saying much).
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Now a question, Oscar. Darling. Brilliant boy who has been through too much: why the fuck aren’t you talking to Ozpin? This will be A Thing later when he presents a lack of time to talk as justification for keeping more secrets (we’ll get to that too…) yet here is time! You’re just sitting there for who knows how long, with plenty of privacy to hide a supposedly one-sided conversation so the Mantle citizens don’t get weirded out or suspicious. Talk to Ozpin. Our headmaster gets two lines in this episode, utterly inconsequential lines like his airship scene, lines that feel like they exist to say, “See? He’s still included in the story!” even though he absolutely is not. Two volumes of mostly silence, a perfect setup to start the reconciliation process, but we’re going to put it off again?
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Instead Ruby randomly and conveniently appears. I want to know how she found him. Oscar isn’t wearing a tracker. He clearly didn’t call them because he’s surprised when Ruby shows up. He fell alllllllll the way back down to Mantle and then wandered to a random part of the slums. You’re telling me they flew over the entire city—after beginning this search thinking he was in Atlas—and somehow managed to spot him from up in the air? C’mon. I would have rather had a beginning where Oscar makes his way back to the group himself, giving him and Ozpin time to hash things out.
“Need a lift?” Ruby says, eliminating that potential. Sigh.
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Oscar immediately starts beating himself up when he gets onboard, saying that he “was stupid to think the General would listen.” Nah, you were stupid to buy into Ruby’s nonsensical confidence and for telling Ironwood he’s as bad as Salem. Sorry, Oscar, but everyone is written badly these days. I will, however, say that I am THRILLED at the group’s reaction to his return. Ruby says that she’s “just glad you’re alright.” Nora has a wonderfully tender moment where she hugs him gently rather than her usual glomp.
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That? That added a year to my life. Everyone else seems relieved that he’s okay too, so kudos there. After four years of Oscar being an outsider in the group, this is one of the few moments that feel like he’s 100% accepted. Really glad to see it.
Now let’s see if it sticks after they learn Ozpin is back...
They fly to the Happy Huntresses’ base and I again feel like I’ve missed something crucial. When did they team up? I mean, RWBYJNOR was working directly under Ironwood up until the last hour and Robyn ran off to fight Tyrian/Clover in the last couple episodes. When did she have time to explain her (briefly) changed allegiance and why would the Happy Huntresses trust the group without that? Did Robyn share that Blake and Yang went behind Ironwood’s back for her? Do the Huntresses instinctively trust them because they’re now wanted by the military? How did they even run into each other?
Again, I think we would have been better served to have an episode before all this. Let Oscar make his way back and let the group struggle with the magnitude of their situation on the airship, before they find new allies. Transferring directly to, “They have help and a secret base and a plan in the works!” makes me feel like I missed the real premiere last week. You know, the one where Salem unexpectedly arrived and we left the group like this.
This is where we’ve ended up though. The group is cozy in this hideout, getting info from Joanna, and my only other thought is, “Why is she giving all this exposition?”  
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Shouldn’t it be May? I mean, we were told that she was going to play more of a role this volume, a promise that’s pretty important imo given her status as a (so far off screen) trans character, so why not put her in the role of mediator between the Happy Huntresses and RWBYJNR? Giving her that setup as a leader among her people as well as lots of lines would be meaningful. A trans character just existing and being a part of this fight! May could obviously still fill that role—I’m well aware that we’re only one episode in—but it just seems like a missed opportunity to me. Out of all the undeveloped Happy Huntresses, our premiere focuses on the one who has the least importance to the fandom.
As said, Joanna talks a fair bit but what it basically boils down to is trying to get everyone to the crater below Atlas. It’s apparently not safe, but it’s warm, which is what matters right now.
So… let me get this straight. You want to gather everyone into a not safe crater, by leading them through an army of grimm, so that they can wait there in case someone moves the Staff, thus dropping an entire city on top of their heads? That’s the plan? Which admittedly isn’t Joanna’s fault. This is another instance of RWBYJNOR having information that a leader does not and they should really consider speaking up about it. But of course they don’t.
Also, how long does everyone have in regards to the cold? Shouldn’t there be dead civilians by now? The time it would take to find the Happy Huntresses, team up with them, get settled in the base, and find Oscar says that things should be pretty grim right now (pardon the pun), yet every non-aura user in this city seems content to just hang out in the snow. Either the cold is deadly enough to justify moving everyone to the crater, or it’s mild enough to let everyone survive this long, not both.
After hugs are given everyone obviously wants to know what happened to Oscar. His response?
“It’s a… long story. I get the feeling there’s been a few of those tonight.”
That’s a check for the bingo card! We’re halfway through the first episode and we’ve already got another secret. Yes, this is a secret. Oscar actively chooses not to tell anyone that Ozpin is back—something Ozpin himself comments on—and then skillfully draws attention away from himself with “I get the feeling there’s been a few of those tonight.” Indeed, all eyes go to Penny. Oscar’s plight is forgotten, which is what he wanted. His justification?
Ozpin: “You’re not going to tell them?”
Oscar: “You and I aren’t done talking yet.”
Along with this look.
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Oscar no. There’s so much wrong with this I don’t even know where to begin. Let’s create a list.
As said, you had plenty of time to talk to Ozpin and chose not to. Miss me with this excuse.
You are now doing to your friends exactly what you and your friends did to Ironwood, which in turn is what Ozpin did to you! I can’t believe we’ve got Oscar critically side-eyeing him when they are still—still—repeating the behavior they drove Ozpin away for.
What is there to even talk about now? Oscar didn’t punch himself/Ozpin (lol) but he did steal Jinn’s name from Ozpin in the first place. You got what you wanted, drove him away, and have been lying and keeping secrets ever since. The only thing they should be talking about involves apologizing. Any further criticism—which is what Oscar’s expression and curt reply suggests—is beyond hypocritical.
Seriously, what needs to be discussed? There’s no reason not to tell the group unless Oscar wants to talk about whether they should tell them. There’s no good ending here...
Don’t you think it would be nice to know that Ozpin is back and you’ve got super magic powers while making plans to save the entire world?
This is all especially stupid given Oscar’s “Salem wants to divide us” reminder to Ruby in a moment. Oscar, you are doing the most to divide the group right now. By not forgiving Ozpin. By refusing to work with him. By keeping him secret from everyone else.
This is bad, friends, I worry for what the rest of the volume will bring…
The story is done with Ozpin for now so I guess I will be too. The group continues filling Oscar in and we get some shots of the base, including a rather prominent poster of what I assume are two Happy Huntresses. Did they die in battle perhaps?
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It’s a little strange.
Oscar: “Where’s Qrow?”
Me: “Likely still making bad decisions.”
No one knows so they just drop it. Which I kind of get, only so much you can do to find him if he’s not out on the streets like Oscar, but it still reads as kind of iffy that two nieces look down at the ground for a hot second and then move on with their plans, content to leave Qrow to whatever fate befell him. In a minute we’ll see Yang firmly take Ren’s side regarding helping the people they can in Mantle, which frankly comes out of nowhere for her. I think an easy motivation would have been Qrow. Ruby wants to save the world, Yang wants to find and save their uncle, and that just happens to align with Ren’s desire to save the civilians who need immediate grimm and cold help. Don’t get me wrong, I like that there’s finally some division between the sisters, I just wish it hadn’t come about so abruptly. Ren had setup for standing up to Ruby. Yang did not.
But I’m getting a little ahead of myself. Joanna lists the grimm horde and no heat as the major threats to everyone. The group agrees.
Me: What about Salem?
Joanna says that this is all doubly dangerous because there’s “no more military protection.”
Me: Oh, so now you want the military?
This is all so disjointed. Even more-so when Joanna mentions that Ironwood has stopped all evacuations to Atlas, likely due to the “hard light shields” that are the only thing standing between Salem and the city. Thing is, the show never makes this connection, I just did it myself based on this scene and the one that comes later. The show presents Joanna’s line as a pure condemnation. Ironwood won’t let more evacuees in because… he’s just evil, I guess. Yet there is a justification here, namely that continuing the evacuations even while he’s stuck without Penny leaves him wide open to a Salem attack, the death of everyone currently safe, but that argument is never presented to the viewer. I don’t need people to agree with Ironwood’s perspective, I just wish that perspective was offered as an option. The show is very good about acting like RWBYJNOR’s opinion is the only justified opinion, or simply the only opinion at all.
After everything is laid out Weiss goes, “We’re never going to sleep again, I just know it.”
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I could make a crack about the lack of continuity and how the group should be collapsing right now… but that was a funny line. It can stay.
What is far more of a problem is the fact that no one is talking about Salem. Okay, that’s a lie. They do talk about her, but in a roundabout way like her presence isn’t impacting every decision they make. That’s the real issue. They’re acting as if Salem isn’t here right now, like she’s off far away, maybe approaching slowly, and they’re arguing over how best to prep the world for her eventual attack. There’s no emotion here—let alone action—to reflect that the series’ Big Bad has arrived and is poised to murder them all. Literally what is this? Ruby is yelling about warning the world and, ignoring the continued question of why that’s a good thing when the world can do nothing to stop Salem and knowledge of her continually drives people to horrible acts, she has yet to acknowledge that… she’s the world? Ruby is the world in this conflict. She, Mantle, and Atlas. Salem is here for you all. Right now. You are, this instant, in the situation you want to warn others about, so why don’t you try to do something about it? Or at least acknowledge it. Ruby wants to warn the neighborhood about a potential fire while her house is actively ablaze, and the fire could have totally killed her by now but decided not to for… reasons.
“Ruby’s right,” Nora says. They have to tell the world so “they can prepare.” How? How are they supposed to prepare for this? The story cannot continue ignoring Salem’s immortality.
“Ruby’s right,” is all Blake says and I’m starting to thinks that’s why her character exists now, to agree with Ruby. It’s great that she’s getting a little distance from Yang, but man.
As Ruby asks whether Pietro can get Amity up and running despite it not being finished (called it) we start an incredibly odd sequence of flashforwards to their individual missions. I’ve seen a lot of praise for this already and though I agree that, in theory, it’s a good way to save time, I found the actual execution to be jarring. Upon thinking back through our timeline, it became clear they were flashforwards, but while watching I thought they might be flashbacks (especially since that’s more common).
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Some of the shots, like Nora’s, just look awkward when you’ve got the exact expression and pose transplanted from one scene to another, like she’s a cardboard cutout behind a green screen. To say nothing of how the flashforwards ruin any suspense (I use that word loosely) in the conversation itself. If the question is, “Will they decide to go to the military compound?” then that question is answered when we see Ruby scoping out the compound, not when the group actually decides on the course of action.
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It just made an already muddled scene worse for me, so I hope this trend doesn’t continue.
And of course, Amity can be used despite all the info last volume claiming that it wasn’t finished. Pietro suddenly acts like it is finished and the only thing standing in their way is Ironwood providing access. If that were the case, he would have used Amity weeks or days ago like he wanted to! When was it finished? Not after Watts commented on how incomplete it was. When did they get back the resources they needed from Robyn? It’s as ridiculous and retcon-y as I thought it would be.
Yang points out that Ironwood will never listen to them and Ruby counters that “he doesn’t have to.” They’ll just take the access from him. Because why wouldn’t they in a series where they’ve already stolen two airships? Stealing from the super evil military that Joanna wishes were helping them right now is just the group’s go-to plan nowadays.
Pietro isn’t sold on this plan though. He lists at least three obstacles they’d need to get through “and then… oh boy, I might need to think about this some more.” “And just to clarify,” Oscar says, “This is the easy option?” Um...no it’s not? We also know there’s an access point in Ironwood’s office so… why not go there instead? They really think the Academy is less guarded than the military base? There’s a potential justification here along the lines of, “After Neo and Cinder broke into his office Ironwood will have the place on high alert,” but unless I missed it the group doesn’t assume anything like that. They just listen to Pietro point out all the ways they can’t get into the military base and jump straight to that being the best option. It feels like a transparent way to create conflict for the group. We’ll just have them taking the most dangerous route despite an easy route being offered alongside it. Why bother mentioning his office at all? Just have the access in the military base. Boom, done.
It’s that conflict and the fact that Ruby tends to hear “You can’t” and digs in her heels. You can’t go to Atlas. I’ll just steal a ship then. You can’t defeat Salem. Watch me. You can’t break into this base. Guess what I’m doing! She’s dangerous in her fairy tale, meta-driven insistence that everything will turn out her way because she wants it to.
Speaking of, we finally—FINALLY—get someone challenging Ruby. Sort of. Not actually but it’s the closest we’ve ever gotten:
Yang: “Ruby, when we came here we said we’d follow your lead… but things haven’t exactly worked out.”
Now, there are two things to take away from this moment. The first is how utterly shocked Ruby and the others are. I mean, take a look at these expressions.
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Ruby straight up can’t believe what she’s hearing. Weiss put her hand to her mouth like this is the most dramatic thing to ever happen to her. Oscar looks down in a ‘Yeah, I agree but please don’t look at me and make me admit that’ way. And Nora looks indifferent in the screenshot but animated she goes sort of stern, likely pissed that Yang would dare say that given her own agreement with Ruby. This not only reiterates that Yang’s challenge came out of nowhere—seriously, how did we move from following Ruby no matter what to this? Last volume she asked a single question along the lines of, ‘You sure?’ and when Ruby said ‘Yes’ Yang was entirely on board—but also demonstrates that no one has EVER said no to her before. Ruby is amazed that someone would challenge her. The act of challenging Ruby is, in and of itself, shocking. This group has gotten so used to following Ruby blindly that the teensiest little pushback is greeted with this.
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Because it is teensy. This is the second takeaway: Yang barely challenges her and that challenge leads nowhere. She doesn’t accuse Ruby of anything, she doesn’t question her continued authority, she just broadly implies that things could be better. We followed you, now things are bad, take from that what you will. It’s incredibly mild as far as criticism goes, making the shock all the more, well, shocking, but it also amounts to—wait for it—nothing! Because Yang didn’t truly challenge Ruby’s leadership. She’s still in charge, she’s still calling the shots, and they’re still listening to her. We might have gotten some change if this division had been allowed to play out, but instead Jaune comes in with a, “Let’s go for both!” solution. It let’s both groups get what they want which, in turn, releases them from the need to grapple with whether they’ll listen to Ruby when she’s advocating for something they don’t agree with. We have now lost the chance to see whether, when push comes to shove, Ren and Yang will cave to Ruby’s will or stick by their own beliefs.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s more conflict than we’ve gotten in years, but that doesn’t mean it’s particularly compelling conflict. It’s good by RWBY’s standards, which doesn’t necessarily make it good. The actual issues at hand—Ruby’s dangerous arrogance, the group’s loyalty, her choices up until now—are just swept under the rug. For all the visuals we get insisting that there’s this great divide in the group… there’s really not. Not in any way that matters.
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Also, Ruby is an idiot. Okay, that was mean, but she really is in this scene. She’s actually not an idiot overall because she was written as wonderfully intelligent in the early volumes, but now? Lately? She makes me want to bang my head against a wall.
“But that’s how Salem got this far,” she cries. “By dividing us!”
Ruby… oh my god, Ruby. No one should have to explain to you that dividing people means turning them against each other, not literally dividing your team to complete separate tasks. This girl honestly thought that because there was this teensy disagreement and that half the team would complete Plan A while she and the other half completed Plan B, both of which notably work towards the goal of, “Protect people from Salem,” that this was somehow what Salem wanted. That is was dangerous. Honestly, it’s a scary look at her view of leadership too: If everyone doesn’t 100% agree with me and do what I say, that’s an objectively bad thing that the grimm queen wants, right? Does Ruby think that unification means following a single person (her) without question or variation? That would explain a lot...
The fact that Oscar needs to explain the difference to her is not good. It really doesn’t say great things about this version of Ruby. Though he was comparing Ironwood to Salem last volume, so really they should all be wearing dunce hats.
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Penny offers to take the relic directly to Salem in exchange for her leaving the kingdom alone. I honestly didn’t expect that. If anyone took that risk I would have put my money on Ozpin (but of course, during all this talk of the women he knows best, he’s kept quiet). Oscar is again the voice of wisdom, pointing out that they have no reassurance that Salem will keep her word. At least Penny is thinking about Salem as a threat though, so kudos for that. When this plan is shot down she volunteers to get Ruby past the military security instead and, uh, she’s a little intense about it.
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I’m not entirely sure what is going on with Penny. She disagreed with Winter but then seemed to come around to her point of view, enough to help anyway. They had another (stupid) disagreement about the value of individual lives, so that helps to explain why she’s teaming up with RWBYJNOR (if you ignore that Ironwood is also trying to save individual lives...). Did watching Fria die shake her up? Is it being the Winter Maiden that’s not sitting right? Does Penny have lingering feelings about the framing that haven’t shown up until now? Her status as a ‘real girl’? We’ve got a lot of reasons that could definitely explain this sudden need to fight, but we’re not told which—if any of these—is the driving force.  
We’re then given a lot of little details. Someone points out that if Salem gets the staff and “create[s] anything else” then Atlas will fall (so yeah, let’s move the people underneath it). We still don’t know what exactly the Staff does because “creation” is kind of broad and “powering a city to float” doesn’t seem to sit within that category at all. Pietro gives Yang the keys to his lab so they can get the bikes. We see the group dividing in the flashforwards, something I do like, especially since the show has gone out of its way to break up most of the usual duos. Nora in particular is pissed at Ren for his choice.
“Oh, I’m saving Mantle because I actually believe we can do this.”
#yikes. Well, I did say I wanted a conflict other than ‘Oh no, one of us might die’ and it looks like I got it. But Nora, the only reason you can do this is because the plot is in your corner: none of you are collapsing from two major fights, you didn’t lose your aura so the cold isn’t a danger, the military is barely a threat all of a sudden, Salem is helpfully hanging out in her whale instead of killing you, and the story decided that Amity can function so long as you all are the ones who get to use it. That’s why you can do this. Ren, who follows in-world logic and doesn’t want to risk a whole kingdom’s worth of lives on a pipe dream, thinks differently, oddly enough.
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As they leave though Penny gets a call from Ironwood. I know precisely what the fandom is going to say here: “This evil man is just trying to use Penny to open the vault!” Of course he is. He needs it open to save everyone he can, Penny included. Plus the concept of “using” her is a double-edged sword. What do we think the group is doing right now? Using her to get past the security. Penny’s power is a tool any way you slice it. Granted, Penny volunteers to help the group, but notably here Ruby speaks for her. Penny seems torn and Ruby takes the scroll away with, “She’s not going anywhere until you change your mind about Mantle.”
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Sorry, Ruby, but coming from you that sounds less like a reassurance for Penny and more like just an order for Ironwood. Remember Harriet? We’ll stop attacking you provided you do what we want. Ruby has yet to learn about compromises, let alone acknowledge that she might be wrong. How about you let Penny decide where she goes, especially since by all logic she should have a lot of loyalty to Ironwood. She knew him before she ever met you. She’s worked with him since she was rebuild post-Volume 3. Despite what Penny has said, if the story would just let her think about his actions for a hot second—making her the protector of Mantle, sticking up for her after the framing, sending her to the party, teaming her up with Ruby, etc.—she might realize that the ‘He doesn’t want me to have friends’ and ‘He just treats me like a tool’ assumptions are just that, unfounded assumptions. But no, Ruby speaks for them both because Ironwood is evil now.
“If she makes it through our defenses,” Ironwood says, “everything that follows will be on your hands.”
That’s true! Kind of like how it’s own Qrow’s hands that Clover died. When you insist on making a bad situation worse you hold responsibility when the shit hits the fan. You know though that Salem won’t get through their defenses now, somehow, so that there’s no chance RWBYJNOR will be blamed for it. Or, by that point Ironwood will be so crazed that anything coming out of his mouth is dismissed, no matter how accurate it might be.
We then transfer to the Ace Ops who are, despite what the fandom theorized for many months, clearly upset about Clover. Also pissed. Which they have every right to be. Their friend and leader was killed. Imagine for a moment that Ruby had been murdered by Tyrian with an allies’ help. Exactly what do you think the group would do? Swallow it quietly and get over it? Ha.
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I’ve already seen some speculation that Clover survived due to details like showing us the bandage and his room being listed as for a “Patient,” but he looks pretty dead to me.
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He got gutted through the chest and left out in the snow for who knows how long. We saw him slip away. Qrow screamed over his dead body. He’s not breathing now. If RWBY suddenly claims he survived this, I’m calling BS.
Most of the other visuals we get here were already dropped in the trailer. Winter is pretty injured from her encounter with Cinder, likely permanently based on her new outfit. Ironwood had to replace his arm—and I am calling BS on that “Losing his arm is reflective of him losing his humanity” commentary from RT. Please go read up on a couple decades worth of ableism in media and then get back to me.
We get Ironwood’s line about the light shields and, notably, a whole lot of empathy. Regardless of what he might want Penny for, he still called her with compassion. He’s watching the Ace Ops mourn their friend. He’s talking about protecting his kingdom. The first thing he says to Winter is, “Thank you, Winter. I don’t know what I would do without you.” Ironwood has a heart! It’s always on display, which makes this scene utterly ridiculous.
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I literally don’t know how to respond to this. The gunshot made me jump, both because it’s a gunshot and because, again, what the fuck? I know I said that next volume RT might just have Ironwood descend into full villainy, shooting whoever he pleases now that he’s shot Oscar, but I didn’t actually expect them to do it. Because he never should have shot Oscar in the first place! I wanted the story to let Oscar grapple with it a bit and then quietly backtrack, acknowledging it as the mistake it was. The concept that Ironwood, empathetic Ironwood, rational Ironwood, always thinks before he acts Ironwood, let’s kids yell at him Ironwood, tried to team up with Robyn Ironwood, did everything Ruby wanted Ironwood, won’t kill Watts after he destroyed his arm Ironwood would shoot this guy just to shut him up is absurd. It was absurd then, it’s absurd now.
That being said, there’s a possibility he didn’t actually shoot the council member, but rather just (“just”) gave a warning shot down the hallway. I say this because the reactions to this are pretty tame. Everyone looks startled, yeah, but after the initial shot there’s nothing that I would expect if there was now a guy bleeding out on the floor. The council woman doesn’t scream. Winter doesn’t seem overly shocked. No one is running to try and help him. Basically, if Ironwood had just killed a political figure in front of six witnesses, entirely unprovoked, I would expect a bit more of a reaction than this. This feels far more like a, “Damn he’s not joking around, letting off warning shots to get people to leave him alone” not “WOW, our general just killed someone in cold blood!”
What I really hate though—beyond just assassinating his character—is how many fans think my friends and I are delusional for calling it character assassination at all. I hopped onto the RWBY tag for five minutes this morning and was bombarded with posts about how Ironwood needs to be murdered horrifically, anyone who likes him is sick, the Ironwood stans are as bad as Adam stans, you’re an idiot if you want him redeemed… because apparently the concept of a story writing a character badly doesn’t compute. I’m not here to argue that Ironwood didn’t do these awful things (regardless of whether he actually killed the guy or not). I’m not here to argue that they’re not awful. I’m just here to say that we never should have gotten these scenes in the first place, or if we were going to get them, we deserved an actual descent into murder at the drop of a hat territory. I’ve already explained extensively on this blog how early Ironwood was not accurate foreshadowing for this, and Volume 7 certainly wasn’t setup, but it looks like the majority of fans aren’t interested in examining whether any of this adds up. Which makes my job, as someone trying to examine this series somewhat objectively—in as much as that’s possible for any single viewer—as well as simply enjoy it as a show, really hard. It’s bad enough when a story keeps taking the characters you love and villainizing them, and doing that badly, but then when you turn to the community and see them rallying around the idea that you’re awful for being dissatisfied—you’re the bootlicker, you’re the blind stan, you can’t see what’s ‘really’ going on here… that sucks. For those of you happy and satisfied with Ironwood’s arc, that’s great! I’ve also seen a lot of posts hyping up the complexity of his character now. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying what we’ve been given and I’d never want to imply that just because it’s not what I wanted it’s somehow wrong. I’m honestly thrilled that after a year of worry so many people have adored our premiere, including this scene. I just wish that I could say RWBY had given me something I didn’t want in a persuasive manner and that the fandom as a whole was a bit more welcoming of differing criticisms.
Not that I didn’t already know the RWBY fandom had its flaws, but still lol.
That’s basically it for our premiere. Nice note to end on, huh? Our final scene is of Salem using the lamp to set her bloodhound grimm on the city. Why doesn’t she just go herself? What was she planning to do here in Atlas in the first place, considering that getting the relic was a surprise? Who knows. Little about this holds together. But we do end with another awesome shot, so small favors.
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It’s always strange concluding a recap, but even more-so when it’s a premiere, during a historical moment in the U.S., amidst all the nonsense that is 2020. So for now I’ll just conclude with three quick things:
The updated bingo board will be listed at the end of each recap, provided I don’t forget about it lol. Today I’m checking off tone (not nearly enough freaking out about Salem), the team keeping secrets (Oscar), and major plot point dropped (Amity is suddenly finished). I could also probably check off the cold not killing civilians and getting Amity up and running, but we’ll see if any changes with those.
I’m including my Ko-Fi link at the end of recaps now. Not with any expectations. Not with anything resembling pressure. I thought long and hard over whether to include it at all—let alone mention it here—because I love doing these and never want anyone to feel like it comes with strings attached. But life is a little harder and weirder than it was last year, so I figure it can’t hurt. Feel free to pass on by and I won’t be bringing it up past this note.
Far more importantly: thank you for reading! :D
(Bonus 4. Editing this was an absolute nightmare — damn you, tumblr!  — so I apologize if anything is super wonky when I finally post.)
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See you next week! 💜
[Ko-Fi]
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fairymascot · 7 years
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Some of you were kind enough to enable me, and so, here it is. Almost 2,600 words of everything wrong with Makoto Shinkai's 'Your Name', because gosh diddly dang it am I tired of seeing it heaped with baseless praise. This analysis contains spoilers for the whole movie, so read at your own risk! Stashing it under cut for length. Everything Wrong with 'Your Name': A Really Long Chunk of Media Analysis
'Your Name' is a top-grossing, critically acclaimed anime feature by Makoto Shinkai. It is, in short, about a teen girl from a small south-of-nowhere town and a teen guy from Tokyo, who mysteriously find themselves spending entire days in each other's bodies. They fall in love, as every guy and girl are meant to do, and it is then revealed that (1) the boy lives three years in the future, (2) the girl's town is to be unexpectedly destroyed by a stray chunk of comet, and so the guy goes back in time through her body to save her and the people of her town. They meet like a decade later and presumably get married and live happily ever after, the end.
This movie, with its gorgeous animation, artistic directing and beautiful original soundtrack by popular band Radwimps, was quick to achieve immense commercial and critical success. So just what is it that's wrong with it? Boy. Where do I begin.
It's phenomenally lazy in its writing.
The movie opens with intersecting inner monologues by the two main characters, in which they very melodramatically narrate the gaping void in their hearts without each other, and establish the fact that they are soulmates. Yes, five seconds in we are told are plainly told by the characters that they are soulmates, without knowing who they are or what kind of dynamic they have. This is a very convenient move: instead of having to go through the effort of selling us on their romance through the story, the writer just tells us from the get-go we have to be invested in it.
Unsurprisingly, at no point does the movie back this up with actual development.
By the nature of this story, the main pairing cannot interact. It's very on the nose with its star-crossed lovers thing. Their only way of getting to know each other is through memos they leave on each other's phones while in their bodies, and through how their surroundings treat them. Since they spend a couple days in each other's bodies per week, and only leave one memo a day -- usually a summary of what they did while in each other's bodies, to provide a reference for when they change back -- there is no real back-and-forth interaction even over text.
What I'm saying is this story is selling us an epic romance between two people who have never spoken once in their lives. It does this exclusively through cheap, external narrative stunts: first the monologues in the beginning, and then, around a third of the way in, through a supporting character telling the main boy that he's acting like he's in love with someone, which of course instantly opens his eyes to his feelings that the writer spent absolutely no time trying to actually develop. Oldest trick in the book.
The two of them interact for a single, two-minute scene, fifteen minutes or so before the movie ends. When the girl's town is about to be destroyed by the comet, through the magic of love and God-knows-what, their timelines briefly manage to intersect and allow them to interact. This hugely crucial moment in is written in the shallowest, most unsatisfying manner imaginable: in the story's biggest and only chance to sell the viewers on the depth of their supposed love, it offers us a stock guy-on-girl anime interaction, stuffed so full of stereotypes you could fill a bingo card with it: the girl cries emotionally at the sight of him, she blushes and huffily calls him a pervert and an idiot, she bashfully asks him if she looks pretty and then gets huffy, again, over his unenthusiastic response. The guy, like every main character in a romance anime, offers nothing but lukewarm, inane reactions, despite the fact he just spent half the movie scrambling to save this girl's life and finally gets to meet her against all odds. Not a word of real substance or emotional value is spoken between them, but the scene is framed oh so very prettily, with the sunset fading in the background accompanied by swelling violin music. So of course, we're supposed to be deeply touched.
Yeah, no.
It's so mind-numbingly stereotypical in its handling of gender and romance, you'd think it was written fifty years ago.
Instead of giving the characters actually unique and compelling personalities, the guy and girl's personalities can be aptly summed up as 'guy' and 'girl'. The guy is rough around the edges, quick to anger, loud and brash, physically strong, likes sports, incapable of doing anything too intricate or gentle with his hands. The girl is sensitive, emotional and highly concerned with others' view of her, gets self-conscious easily, good at sewing, and dreams of living a stylish life in Tokyo where she can go to cute cafes. There is not one, single aspect to these characters that betrays the generic societal expectations of what 'a guy' and 'a girl' are like.
Aha! But make no mistake. It's necessary for them to have these exact personalities, because 90% of the humor in this movie hinges on gender essentialist jokes. The whole first half of the film, where it's still light-hearted before gearing into melodrama mode, carries the punchline: 'Look! A girl acting like a boy! A boy acting like a girl! How wild is this, you guys?!' To name some of the fresh and inventive jokes it provides us with: the boy, when in the girl's body, cannot put her hair in the right hairdo; he sits open-legged; he gets into fights; he makes her suddenly excellent at sports, which earns her a long list of female admirers, much to her dismay. The girl, when in the boy's body, initially refers to herself in an inappropriately feminine manner; she acts timid and delicate; one of the guy's friends comments 'don't you think he's kind of cute today' while blushing, which of course gets him a weird look from his other friend, because what the hell dude, that’s, like, gay.
There's a lot that can be done with body-swapping narratives, especially when the swap is with a member of the opposite sex. It can be used as a tool for some incredibly interesting psychological exploration, as well as delving into potentially queer themes. The female protagonist herself even declares at the beginning of the movie that she wishes she could be a guy, but you know, not in a weird way, or anything. The movie isn't interested in that, of course, because it's very important for it to be about a boy and a girl who are very cis and straight and who fall in love in the most banal way possible. Which is fine, I mean, that's the standard, but couldn't it be a little less offensive about it?
The thing about this movie is that while it attempts to pass itself off as a dual protagonist movie, that's really not the case. Once the plot gets rolling and there's a comet to be stopped, the female character is taken completely out of the picture for maybe a third of the movie, now in the role of a helpless damsel for the guy to rescue. She is not active in any way; she does not contribute to the plot, despite it revolving around saving her hometown. The guy searches, researches, travels physically as well as metaphysically, plans, warns, blows shit up, evacuates, She only does one, single thing, at the very end, which is speak to the town's mayor -- her father -- to convince him of the coming danger. And that's not even shown on-screen.
Oh, yes, and a running gag throughout the movie is: every single time the boy wakes up in the girl's body, he spends a good fifteen minutes fondling her breasts. He even comments, at some point, that 'doing this is bad for her', before happily continuing on. The girl finds out about it -- through her sister commenting on it, of course, not like they guy would come clean -- and confronts him about it during their single shared scene (where she blushes and calls him a pervert), at which he lies and states that it was only the one time, and she forgives him and lets it go. Because that's how you treat the love of your life, folks!
Nothing about the plot makes any goddamn fucking sense.
The ultimate reveal of the film is that the guy and the girl began swapping bodies for the purpose of saving the town from the comet. It's revealed, in addition, that the girl's mother and grandmother went through similar body-swapping experiences in their youth -- except they never led to anything, and were written off as 'dreams'.
Let's go over this again. Some cosmic force of the universe wanted to save the townspeople from death by a meteor crash, and its way of doing so was... to have a certain family of women swap bodies with random big-city men from the not-distant future, over the course of fifty-odd years?
What?
Why?
Let's start with the time discrepancy. Why is it there? Oh, the answer is simple: so you can have the motif of 'love that crosses time and space' reappear in the movie over and over again, lest the audience forgets how epic this romance is. But otherwise? Absolutely no reason. Because, you see, while you could say that the boy could use his knowledge from the future to save the town in time... he doesn't. It's only until after the girl's timeline in the past reaches the point where she and her entire town are killed that the guy discovers it in his timeline, and to save her, he has to go back in time -- not just by his definition of time, but by her definition of time as well. So if the guy was going to find out about the destruction after the fact and go back in time anyway... what narrative purpose does the time gap even possess? None. None at all.
Continuing: why did they choose to mention this has been a thing for generations? It raises more questions than it answers. It didn't take long for the main characters to realize the body swapping isn't just some weird dream, seeing as it left a very real imprint on their real lives and was acknowledged repeatedly by everyone around them. How in the world would the generations before them somehow manage to overlook this? And what would even be the point of warning the town of an up and coming comet fifty years in advance, when there's no way to prove it or any chance anyone would believe it? Yet even so-- if that's truly the method the universe has its eyes set on, why did it just give up on the girl's grandmother and mother, content to bring them closer to annihilation while waiting for the next generation to be born? What are the logistics of any of this?
Then, of course, you have the biggest question of all: How is a seventeen year old Tokyo boy with no special skills equipped to deal with a meteor strike? If we're really meant to accept he was chosen for a higher purpose, wouldn't it make sense to have him be fit to fulfill said purpose? Had the movie waved it all off as some grand cosmic joke or whatever, then sure, it would've still been a total disaster, but at least we would've had one less point to critically analyze it from. But if we're to consider that the whole crux of the story, supposedly, is to keep the comet from wiping out the town, the whole thing completely falls apart.
There are a hundred more effective ways they could've gone about this narrative. First of all: there's no reason for the boy to even be involved. I mean-- again, yes, for the star-crossed romance drama. But from a practical storytelling point? The only advantage he has over the girl is the knowledge of the comet's arrival. That's it. So thinking about it logically, this could've been a movie about her and her alone, if she were just granted visions of the future. It sure would've saved a whole lot of mess, confusion, and needless bumbling around.
But since it needs to be about the both of them, for the romance and all, why not make it.... actually about the both of them? Why not make it about the both of them working together to save the town, instead of the girl being completely absent from such a large and critical chunk of the movie dedicated to her own life and home? Or better yet, why not have each one of them work to save the other's timeline? As things are, there's no reason for the girl to even get channeled into the boy's body in the first place. His timeline doesn't need her intervention, and does not benefit from it -- in fact, the central plot would not have suffered in any way if all scenes featuring the girl in the guy's body were cut clean off. Wouldn't this have been a much more compelling, logical story if it were about two individuals who were specifically chosen to intervene with each other's lives due to their individual skillsets and personalities? If they could do something for each other that they couldn't do for themselves, and learn from each other in the process? Wouldn't that have made a lovely movie?
Well, that's not Your Name. Instead, Your Name is a pretentious, overly-budgeted nonsense salad where the head writer seems to have produced the central motifs out of a hat filled with random things he finds cool. No element of the story can be backed up by the plot's actual demands, and a lot of them clash and override each other. The movie tries to incorporate the theme of past lives and reincarnation by alluding to it in dialogues and in the soundtrack's lyrics, for the sole purpose that it sounds epic and full of pathos, even when the body swapping has nothing to actually do with it. It incorporates the theme of star-crossed lovers traveling through time and space, even when, as mentioned, there's no reason for the time gap to be there in the first place. And most prominent and embarrassing of all -- the central motif of names is horribly, laughably forced at every junction. It's as though the idea of 'they fall in love without knowing each other's names' was the original basis for the story, but as it developed the writer realized it makes no sense for them to spend entire days in each other's bodies without finding out their names -- and stubbornly refused to let the motif go, because the feels, you guys. So the two protagonists, having found out each other's names, go on to forget them, recall them, forget them, recall them, and forget them again all in the span of about twenty-five minutes, with no rhyme or reason to it beyond 'this is what would make this particular moment especially dramatic'. It really encapsulates the whole movie's approach to writing: transparently manipulative with no logical backbone, dressed up in as many frills, ribbons and pretty words as possible to tug at the viewers' heartstrings, in the hopes of making them overlook the fact there's absolutely nothing of value underneath.
Well, what can I say. It clearly succeeded. Good on you, Makoto Shinkai.
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joronomo · 7 years
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How to Get a Health Care System for People, Not Just for Corporate Profit
New Post has been published on https://joronomo.com/how-to-get-a-health-care-system-for-people-not-just-for-corporate-profit/
How to Get a Health Care System for People, Not Just for Corporate Profit
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Medicare for All is proven, no-hassle, quality care.
Believe it or not, we can get Congress to enact a new program providing good quality, lower-cost health care for your family and (what the hell, let’s think big here) for every man, woman and (especially) every child in our society.
Step One: eliminate every dime of the multimillion-dollar government subsidy that now covers platinum-level health insurance for all 535 Members of Congress and their families. Let those laissez-faire ideologues who have saddled us with an exorbitantly-expensive, dysfunctional and (let’s admit it) sick system of medical profiteering experience what they’ve wrought, without any government pampering. This includes shutting down their “Office of the Attending Physician,” a little-known spot of pure, 100 percent socialized medicine conveniently located in our U.S. Capitol to provide a full range of government-paid doctors, nurses, pharmacists and others who give immediate, on-the-spot attention to these special ones. A seriously sick child, a car wreck, a cancer diagnosis — and suddenly the civilized idea of Medicare for All will start making sense even to anti-government, you’re-on-your-own Republican ideologues.
Well, you might say, they still won’t feel the pain, because they’re one-percenters, pulling down $174,000 a year each from us taxpayers, meaning they can afford to buy decent health insurance. Ah, but here comes Step Two: put all of our congressional goof-offs on piece-rate, pay-for-performance salaries. Why pay them a flat rate whether they produce or not? For example, American babies are more likely to die in their first year of life than babies in Poland, which provides universal health insurance for all of its people. So, every year that the U.S. Congress fails to provide health coverage for every American family, the members should get their pay docked by a third. Pay them only when they deliver for the people, not for their ideological purity.
When Congress finally assures good health care for all of us, then its members would get the same coverage. But until they deliver for the whole public, the public owes them nothing.
It’s true that America is No. 1 in health care, but before erupting in chants of “USA! USA!” — note that we’re only No. 1 in health care spending. Ouch.
Our country lays out more per person for health insurance and out-of-pocket payments than any other advanced nation on the planet — nearly $10,000 a year for each of us. Germany, Canada, Australia, England, Japan, Poland and all other advanced democracies pay only a fraction of that — yet their people get far better care, are healthier and live longer than our people. That’s because they have nationwide, public health insurance systems providing comprehensive coverage for everyone while eliminating 25-30 percent of every health care dollar that profiteering insurance corporations take for their administrative and advertising costs, exorbitant profits and executive pay, paperwork and waste.
Why don’t we Americans have such an efficient and effective system? We do: Medicare! It’s a proven no-hassle, quality care for each of America’s senior citizens. It works!
But what about children, young people and the middle-aged … the majority of our people? Glad you asked. Sen. Bernie Sanders (along with Sens. Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris and 14 others) have just introduced the “Medicare for All” act, extending this successful commonsense program to everyone.
Sanders’ proposal (like Rep. John Conyers’ bill in the U.S. House) will cut the health care costs paid by typical working families from some $6,200 a year to $466. It’ll also cut out the complexity and stress of getting the care you need — just go to any private doctor you choose, show your public insurance card and — Bingo — you’re in! No more co-pays, deductibles or fighting with corporate insurance bureaucrats trying to keep you out.
Learn more about Bernie’s Medicare for All plan to create a people’s health care system!
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National radio commentator, writer, public speaker, and author of the book, “Swim Against The Current: Even A Dead Fish Can Go With The Flow,” Jim Hightower has spent three decades battling the Powers That Be on behalf of the Powers That Ought To Be – consumers, working families, environmentalists, small businesses, and just-plain-folks. Twice elected Texas Agriculture Commissioner, Hightower is a modern-day Johnny Appleseed, spreading the message of progressive populism all across the American grassroots. He broadcasts daily radio commentaries that are carried in more than 150 commercial and public stations and on the web.
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