#the answer is connection

[discordarchitect]

just solved gender

[viuolet]

10-19-15

i love sleeping. i love when its cold and i love when there’s a lot of fuzzy soft blankets to keep me warm, and a lot of pillows. i cant sleep tonight though. i feel really lonely. i really need someone to sleep next to. i want to list to them breathe and listen to their voice when they’re sleepy and it sounds raspy. i want to know what it feels like when i’m too afraid to breathe or make any noise or do anything because they’re so beyond me and so much more than me.

i want to ruin in an empty road in the middle of nowhere at night and lose myself in the moonlight and just be alive. i want to feel everything rush out of my head and scream at the stars and ask them why i was given an opportunity to experience life; what makes me so special. why was i brought here only to walk with crowds and crowds of people who feel the same way i do; who sees that everyone around them are going in different directions and they cant figure things out on their own, they’re lost and need guidance because they’re too afraid to make a mistake.

i want to feel myself become wavy and sink into the sky, i know i will be welcomed.

- journal entries from when i was 12-13