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#the barrel doesn’t belong to kings. it belongs to bastards.
howtotrainyouragents · 6 months
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I decided I was never gonna be emotionally prepared for Shadow and Bone Season 2 so I might as well watch it emotionally unprepared and let me tell you THAT WAS A BAD IDEA
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fandomnatic · 1 year
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Hello I have watched one (1) episode of season 2 of Six of Crows cough cough shadow and bone and FUCK THEY LITERALLY COULD NOT DO BETTER
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lilisouless · 5 months
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“The barrel doesn’t belong to kings…it belongs to bastards”
Kazzy Mazzy Bazzy , you are not a bastard. Actually most of you were born in marriages, only Nina could have been a bastard since we know nothing about her family
That’s right, the barrel belongs to Nina now 💅
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kazscrows · 1 year
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He’s saying “The Barrel doesn’t belong to kings. It belongs to bastards” now, but what about
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daria1611 · 1 year
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the crows( tho one’s missing) spoiler alert 🚨
“The Barrel doesn’t belong to kings. It belongs to bastards” I screamed immediately
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“the barrel doesn’t belong to kings, it belongs to bastards”
- kaz brekker (the totally legitimate son of two completely normal farmers)
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The Phoenix and the Crow
part five
pairing: (in the making) kaz brekker x fem!reader
genre: neutural
el's thoughts: this one has a lot of action haha and was a bit harder to get through, but here it is! hope y'all like it! please remember to reblog and comment :)
series masterlist
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The inferni rushed over to the brunette and wrapped her in a tight hug, “Oh, I’ve missed you!” Nina gasped in surprise, “Y/N! What in Saint’s sake are you doing here of all places?” Y/N chuckled, “I thought I needed a vacation. Look where and with who I’ve ended up.” 
Kaz looked between the two grisha. “And how do you two know each other?” 
“The little palace.” They replied together.
Wylan shuffled his feet once the silence settled in the workshop. “Can I get anyone some tea?”
Kaz rolled his eyes at Wylan and turned back to Nina, “You worked with Arken.”
“It was more of a limited partnership.” Nina shrugged while she kept an arm wrapped around Y/N’s shoulders. 
“Did you trust him?” Kaz was expecting a certain answer.
Nina scoffed, “That turncoat? Not on your life. He was shadier than an oak at three bells.”
Kaz looked satisfied, “What’s your price?”
“I’ve expended the legal avenues on my problem. Every clerk in the city says the same thing. ‘The judge will see you in six months.’” Nina’s voice grew frustrated at the reminder of being turned down and away time and time again.
“And so you’re looking for the not-so-legal route on… What, exactly?”
“I’m told you could free someone from Hellgate.”
Kaz looked towards Inej and she stood there unmoving, both their eyes were calculating, but one pair was colder than the other. 
“Hellgate? Who do you need from Hellgate?” Y/N asked.
“Someone, I say as if he’s anyone, and in truth, he’s the love of my life,” Nina spoke while looking between Y/N and Kaz. The inferni smiled with pride at the thought of her good friend finding love. Kaz on the other hand pursed his lips in thought and tilted his head, “I can’t get you a release from Hellgate.” Nina nodded in acceptance before he spoke up again, “But I can get you a visit. In exchange for your services.”
“What do you need me for?”
“The aftermath.”
Everyone stared at him as he walked up the steps, “Follow me.” Y/N and Nina stood in place for a moment before Inej spoke up. “He does this.” She turned to follow the others as the two grisha women shared a look, “Does he?”
The group of six walked up and out onto the roof now having a great view of the city. Continuing to follow him, they all lined up beside each other waiting expectantly for Kaz to say something. “Brick by brick.”
Inej looked up at Jesper beside her with furrowed eyebrows seconds before an explosion went off. The large puff of fire and smoke seemed almost unreal as the screams of citizens could barely be heard over the distance.
“What was that?” Jesper’s voice was shaken as he spoke.
“The Crow Club.”
The zemini turned to Wylan, “Was that yours?” The brown-haired boy didn’t respond but looked down in guilt as he realized what he’d helped Kaz do.
Y/N spoke, starting hesitantly, “I take it we’re now in the aftermath?”
“This doesn’t help us clear our name, Kaz. This is war with Pekka Rollins, the King of the Barrel.”
Kaz’s face had no emotion written across it, he held his composer well. “The Barrel doesn’t belong to kings.” He turned on his heel and walked back to the door they came from, “It belongs to bastards.”
~
Crows symbolize prophecy, transformation, change, and freedom. They also remember faces, the people who’ve wronged them, and the people who’ve shown them kindness. ‘It makes sense.’ Y/N thought to herself. Revenge was something that seemed to plague Kaz’s mind, while that alone would be pure danger in a shot glass… He had Inej and Jesper to balance him out. Together they’re still dangerous but more sensible if only Kaz was able to sit and hear his crew out. Their feelings and thoughts, if everything was on the table and sorted properly, would be a well-shaken cocktail.
Y/N walked through the door of the restaurant and quickly found the table her group was seated at. Nina, Wylan, and Inej sat on one side of the booth while Jesper and Kaz sat on the other. “Sorry, I’m late. I got distracted.” She looked at Kaz expectantly, waiting for him to stand or slide into the booth to make room for her. He scowled before he stood up and let her slide in next to Jesper. 
“Move closer,” Jesper muttered in her ear causing her to glance at him confused but she moved either way, leaving more space for Kaz.
“Back to topic. If you hate him so much, why not just hire me to kill him?” Nina asked, “Or why hire me at all? Your sharpshooter or your Wraith could take him out, easy.”
“It’s not enough to kill him.” Kaz’s voice was rough as if it was difficult to speak.
Inej and Jesper shared a look while Nina and Y/N did the same. 
“Killing him doesn’t help clear our names. That’s why I need all of you, so I can hang everything back on him.”
Y/N hummed as Inej responded. “And we are the pawns who enact your personal vendetta?”
“The three of us are under equal jeopardy. And if they catch us, we can’t protect you.” His coffee-brown eyes bore into Wylan before he shifted his gaze to Nina. “And you’ll have to turn to Pekka to see your man. No doubt with some very unappealing conditions attached.”
“All of that in mind,” Jesper spoke. “I mean, Inej and I need to know the plan.”
Wylan nodded, “Um, yes, I… I, too, would like to know the plan.” He crossed his arms over his chest after speaking. The inferni and bastard’s eyes moved in sync down to his crossed arms and back to his face. One pair was filled with amusement and endearment while the other was filled with the exact opposite.
Kaz scanned the restaurant quickly before shifting his body to the side, “To get leverage on him, I need to know the scope of his business, inside-out. There are two easy to learn this. This first is by following his private driver, and tracking his schedule. Second, his accountant, Henrik Van Poel. If I get access to Pekka’s books, it’ll tell me everything I need to know. So, we need to get into that building.”
Inej pulled the small curtain open and everyone turned to look at the building across the street. 
“It’s where his accountant works. Although, there’s no way of knowing which office.” Nina stood from the table, took the menu, and walked away. Kaz paid no mind and continued, “That’s the mission. It looks like a typical office building, but it has a number of subtle features.”
Y/N zoned out of the conversation. ‘How’d I get from being a soldier to being a thief?’ Nina came back and sat down with a waffle on her plate. Kaz stared at her in disbelief, “I need you with me while I copy Henrik’s books.” He turned to face the girl beside him, “You as well. Gunfire will only draw attention, but a Heartrender-” 
“Has many skills. Yes, like this.” Nina finished swallowing her bite of waffle. “Second floor, second-last door on the left.” Everyone stared at her in confusion. 
After a moment Kaz asked, “What?”
“Henrik's office.” She replied in an obvious tone and turned to Inej, “Do you mind?” She nodded at the empty glass and pitcher of water. “How do you know this?” Inej asked as she passed the water. “I asked the waitress.”
“How did she know?” Jesper asked in utter shock.
“People who work in places like that, they eat in places like this. And sometimes they get meals delivered.” Y/N spoke up this time.
Nina nodded, “Yes, exactly. So I said, ‘Um, excuse me, but I have a delivery and I can’t read the directions.’ Ta-da.”
Jesper chuckled, “I like having her around.”
“And I like truth. You said you’d get me in to see Matthias.”
Kaz nodded his head slowly, clearly impressed with her skills. “You’ll get your visit to Hellgate.”
~
Y/N climbed up the stairs to the roof where Jesper said Kaz was waiting. She had gone with Inej to scope out the building so they have a basic idea of what they were getting themselves into. 
“What did you find?” 
His voice startled her a bit since his back was facing her. “There’s a doorman even after hours, and a pair of roving guards in the halls. But Inej can get you in through a window as long as Nina and myself watch the front.”
“If this goes sideways, tell the others to regroup at the Black Veil. Get the Heartrender. We leave in ten.”
She hesitated and sighed, “Her name is Nina.” She walked closer to him, “Does your crew know what happened between you and Rollins?” She didn’t quite know his full story, but she did know that the two had a history. That was what was fueling his thirst for revenge.
He looked back at her, “All they need to know is that I have a reason. And you need to know even less.”
She rolled her eyes, “There’s enough secrecy in the crew as is, Brekker.”
“Secrecy is the only way to survive the Barrel, Y/L/N.” His voice was harsh, getting on her last nerve.
“So keeping us, keeping your friends in the dark is about survival?”
“Now you’re getting it.”
She hummed, “Their survival or yours?” She received only silence as an answer. “Trust is the other side of secrecy, Kaz. I know I’ve done nothing to earn your trust, but they do. Especially Inej and Jesper, but you’ve instilled such fear into them that they can’t even talk to you about it.” She quickly reined in her tone and temper, “It’d do you good to remember that.” She quickly turned back to the door and walked back down the stairs. 
~
Nina leaned against the wall as Y/N looked around her up and down the street. “Clear.” The pair walked slowly across the street. “Why must I be the drunk one?” Y/N whined quietly. 
“‘Cause I’m the one who’s gonna knock him out.” 
“Doesn’t explain why-” 
Nina yanked the inferni’s arm over her shoulder and kicked her leg out just a little so she was leaning into her side. They made it to the front steps when the doorman stopped in front of them.
“Ooh. Closed up for the night.”
Nina chuckled, “Uh, We’ll just be a minute. I, uh, need to use the loo.”
“You can go down the street to Manny’s pub. They’re open.” He pointed to a building down the road where the lights shined brighter.
“They won’t let us back in there… Not since we drank the barkeep under the table.” She chuckled as Y/N giggled and let a hiccup slip through her lips.
The doorman laughed and looked the Heartrender up and down, “I do like a woman who can hold her liquor.”
“Oh, well, I, uh, can’t hold it everywhere.” She said in a sing-song voice. Y/N giggled again and started humming. “So, do you mind?” She finished.
He cleared his throat, “Not tonight. Sorry, love.”
Nina rolled her eyes and threw up her hands, quickly slowing his heart down. Y/N stood up as the man fell forward onto Nina. “Oof, okay.” She placed him down on the steps. 
“Sorry, love.” The inferni mocked as the pair walked to the door and slipped through.
They made it to the second floor in a hurry, their heels causing a slight echo in the otherwise silent halls. “I thought there were guards in the halls,” Nina asked. Y/N nodded, “There were supposed to be.” The brunette shrugged, “Down that side.” Y/N walked to the office door and pushed it open slowly finding the room empty for just a moment before Kaz appeared in the window.
They were silently sorted through files and heavy books when a heavily accented voice spoke from behind them.
“Fine night, ain’t it, Brekker?”
Kaz slowly looked up as Pekka Rollins turned on an oil lamp on the desk. Guards stood on the other side of the door. ‘We’re trapped.’ “Burning the midnight oil, are we?” Kaz asked.
“I thought I’d cut to the chase.” Pekka ignored Y/N entirely, keeping his attention solely on Kaz. “You can’t show your faces at my clubs and my brothels to pull threads on me, so where would you go?” Kaz stayed silent. “Step away from the desk.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want blood on my furniture. My numbers man’ll bill me for it, and, well, you’ve already cost me enough money by blowing up my club.”
Kaz’s fist clenched as he leaned forward, “My club.”
Pekka hummed in amusement, “Before I kill you, I want you to know that I brought in a madman to capture your Wraith. Sorry. My Wraith.”
Both Y/N and Kaz turned to the window and saw a man in a fur mask climb up the rope that lead to Inej. A low groan was heard from the back of her throat. 
“I fixed up the cellar at the Menagerie, got the best shackles that money can buy.” 
Kaz’s face dropped as anger boiled in the pit of Y/N’s stomach.
“Oh, and I got my man to lay a trap for your gunslinger.”
‘He was outnumbered and outsmarted… Again.’
Kaz only clenched his fist and tightened his grip on his cane.
“Clean sweep, Brekker. All that will be left will be my little spider, back in her cage. Ooh, I’m going to sleep well.”
The door was pushed open and Y/N saw Nina down the hall. Pekka saw her through the glass on the door. “Heartrender!”
“Meet the newest member of my crew.” Kaz held the door still so Nina could see Pekka clearly through the glass as well. The guard on the floor gathered enough strength when Rollins fell to the floor to raise his arm and fire at Nina. She fell backward when the bullet hit her arm. Kaz dived behind the desk and Y/N fell down beside him when gunshots were fired at them.
“Kaz, let me-”
“No.”
The gunshots didn’t let up as grunts were barely heard from the hall. “It’s over, Brekker!” Pekka shouted over the gunfire. Kaz pulled out two small bombs from his pocket and a lighter. He tried to start the lighter but no flicker of fire came from it. He cursed under his breath before Y/N scoffed, “Oh, hand it over.” She pulled the bombs from his hands, snapped her fingers, and lit the fuses before throwing them over to the other side of the desk. Kaz stared at her as she brought her hands over her ears. “Ears!” She shouted at him and he quickly covered his ears right before the bombs went off.
~
“Black Veil is a cemetery?” 
No one answered Y/N’s question as they kept walking, crossing paths with Jesper and Wylan.
“Assuming you got ambushed too?” Jesper asked.
“Oh, yeah, so many of them, I lost count,” Nina said, slightly out of breath. 
“I got what I needed, and Wylan’s bombs took take of the rest.”
Y/N scoffed at him as they followed and waited while he pushed open a large tomb, Inej was leaning on her heavily. “Get her inside,” Kaz instructed. Nina followed the other two girls inside without question. The clicking of the crow cane was familiar at this point and brought a weird sense of peace to Y/N as she lead the group blindly through the tomb.
~*~*~*~
taglist: @rachelcarroll1819 @xcharlottemikaelsonx @khaleesihavilliard @simrah1012 @foulkryptonitepeanut @astridyoo15 @queenofshinigamis @peakyispunk @jahayla-parker @maliciousbrekker @writingmysanity @brekkershadowsinger @winstonthecow22 @lee-says-things
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mysticmeadows · 1 year
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The barrel doesn’t belong to kings… it belongs to bastards.
My crows 🖤 (well, five of six of them, at least!)
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tempestaurora · 1 year
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“the barrel doesn’t belong to kings... it’s belongs to bastards” went fucking HARD and you know it
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laraaevans · 1 year
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Freddy Carter outdid himself in Shadow and Bone season 2. It might have been a fanfiction dumpster fire with messy plot lines, but Kaz owned it.
“I’m here for the killers. People like me.”
“I finally found a weapon to end all of this. *pause* Suffering.”
“I recommend a cane.”
“I buried him. Six feet deep. He went into that box so easily. Didn’t even cry.”
“This city’s price is blood. And I am happy to pay with yours.”
“The Barrel doesn’t belong to kings. It belongs to bastards.”
“A limp. A cane. No one’s ever smart enough to look for the real one.”
“Stay. Stay in Ketterdam. Stay with me. I want you to. I want… I want… you.”
“We’re here, Inej. I want you.”
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general messy thoughts about sab s2 (spoilers ahead)
Things I liked:
- Genya. Daisy Head SLAYED completely she was SO GOOD. I didn’t like them downplaying her scars and I wished we had gotten the line “I am not ruined I’m ruination” especially knowing how much that line means to so many people but other than that Genya was everything Daisy did an INCREDIBLE job of playing her. I actually got teary-eyed at several points this season (and me and my emotions are not at all close so that’s a feat) and they were all either Genya or GenyaDavid scenes, which brings me to…
- Genya and David. They were so good. So wholesome. The best part of this season IMO. Like their brief scenes, them hugging in the woods, the tiniest moments STOLE the show. I cried for these two and these two alone. Also, David was so well-portrayed like I loved these two so much. 
- Several soft Malina moments that gave me butterflies and I felt accurately showed their dynamic, more toward the beginning of the season but they were there.
- Jack Wolfe as Wylan. I have some not-so-positive thoughts about the aged-up crows in general, but I still think Jack was a convincing Wylan and you can tell from both the show and from his interviews that he really cares about Wylan and his portrayal. Every time he LOOKED at Jesper I was like…wow just WOW.
- Getting to see Nina interacting with the Crows was nice. Especially when they turn around and she has waffles and Kaz has that annoyed moment but then we find out Nina got them the info they needed because she’s a spy and she’s incredible? 10/10 and one of the few moments that felt accurate to the real crows. Also, that part where she was talking to the guard and pretending she needed to pee (idk that was a weird way to describe it I know) but that was so Nina
- Also, just them together in a restaurant vibing was what I needed
- “The barrel doesn’t belong to kings. It belongs to bastards.”
- Tolya and Tamar were so cool in their introduction like they’re so hot and cool and powerful ahh
- When Genya, Alina, and Zoya are all at the Darling’s funeral pyre that was chilling
- The slivers of foreshadowing with Zoya.
Things I didn’t like:
- The weird slow motion in some of the fight scenes was so unnecessary lol
- Okay I’m not a fan of the Darkling and I’ve made that quite clear in the past, but I do think he’s a good and interesting villain and I like the Flavour he adds to the story but this season the Flavour was just…not there. It’s funny how many Darkling stans I’ve seen angry about this season because for once we’re in agreement. Like he was so boring and weird and just creepy instead of interesting and creepy? I wanted to skip all his scenes. Also, they took out so many of the awful things he did in the books like what about him killing Ana Kuya? When he says “you’ll have no shelter but me” that line hits so much harder and is so much more chilling and awful because he’s literally killing off the people in her life. Turning Nikolai into a monster himself?? The moment Alina loses her powers in the books and the Darkling tells her she’s nothing is SO IMPORTANT because it shows he’s just interested in her for her powers, which is a big theme in the books. As wonderful as Nikolai is, he needs Alina for what she can provide for Ravka. The Apparat just sees her for her power. Everyone wants to use Alina for something except for Mal who just wants them to be happy and able to make their own choices. Anyways, the Darkling didn’t feel like the Darkling from the books at all. Also, he was just cringy. Like I was laughing when he was like “I have returned. And I’ve made some new friends” and stared at the camera it was so bad.
- Ruin & Rising is my favourite from the trilogy and I was so disappointed with how much was cut out for the most random crap, like hallucinating and eating butterflies?? Instead of the bonding time with the whole TGT crew? And no Oncat I’m crying. There’s so much character growth that happens and so many relationships that are deepened in Ruin & Rising and WHERE WAS THAT?
- Personally, I didn’t think Paddy was giving Nikolai. Like he seems like a good person and actor and all that jazz but he just didn’t feel like Nikolai and since Nikolai is my favourite, this kind of hurt.
- Erasing Mal from the story and his struggles. Look, Mal is not by any means a perfect character. And he doesn’t need to be. Let him be messy. Let him struggle and sometimes be rude and make mistakes because that’s real that’s compelling. They could have shown all the book!Mal haters that maybe they were being too harsh on him because he was struggling SO MUCH but instead they just turned him into Perfect Supportive Man. His character growth in Ruin & Rising is so good especially after you’ve spent Siege & Storm thinking “what is going on with this man.” Seeing him owning up to his actions and seeing him working on his flaws and seeing his support for Alina is so good and we deserved it especially considering how talented Archie is.
- Cutting Zoya almost completely out, especially since this is the book where she goes through a lot of growth. Also, the fact that Alina choices they’re making are cutting into Zoya’s future story >:(
 Things I HATED:
- Killing off David. WTF. Obviously we didn’t see a body so he might come back but like…what’s the point. We didn’t even get to see Genya and David get married.
- Almost all of the Crows content. The rushed Crooked Kingdom plotlines with none of the significance from the books. Rushed Wesper. Matthias working with Pekka. Nina’s character completely revolving around Matthias. Kanej focusing on Kaz’s trauma but not Inej’s and making her contract with the Menagerie all about Kaz and his vendetta against Pekka and killing off Tante. Actually, pretty much everything Kanej this season was so awfully handled. Also, just not a fan of the Crows being aged up and I tried to be okay with it but this season made me more upset with the casting choices. The Crows stuff was so so so badly done I want to cry. Comfort rereading the duology right now
- The ending. Just…frick the ending. I hate it. Too many thoughts I just hate it I can’t even talk about it
- I’ve already reblogged a lot of posts that go into things I hated but just in general it was such a mess they combined too many stories without doing them justice and there’s more I’m upset about but this is it for now
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bertolts · 1 year
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The barrel doesn’t belong to kings.
It belongs to bastards.
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bboysmom · 1 year
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It’s Kanej delusion hours and could you imagine we get the ice court spin-off and the season ends in a reflection of “The barrel doesn’t belong to kings… it belongs to bastards.” Only instead we get “I’m going to get my money… and I’m going to get my girl.” Roll credits.
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artemidesarrow · 1 year
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“The barrel doesn’t belong to kings. It belongs to bastards”
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dreamsandstars24 · 1 year
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Forget about “Fine. Make me your villain”, we are now at “The barrel doesn’t belong to Kings, it belongs to bastards.”
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delilah-briarwood · 1 year
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Kaz Brekker
“The Barrel doesn't belong to kings, it belongs to bastards.”
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