#the rest of the semester he wouldn't acknowledge me

[hairmetal666]

It starts in Eddie's second senior year, close to the beginning of the semester. Eddie's in trig (again). He's good at math, but Mundy fucking sucks, always giving Eddie shit for breathing, or his shoes squeaking on the linoleum, or whatever, and he ends up with detention most days. So, he hardly ever shows and can't be bothered to do the homework, even though he knows the answers more often than not.

On this particular day, Mundy is in a bad mood, on Eddie's case way more than normal. In the heat of frustration, Eddie scrawls, "I fucking hate this class" on a scrap of notebook paper, and for reasons he can't begin to explain, leaves it folded on the window ledge. He doesn't think anyone will answer; fully expects the paper to be gone come morning with maybe another detention slip under his belt to show for it. He's a little flabbergasted, the next day, when the note is still there, and loses his mind a little when he sees the words "tell me about it" underneath his first message. He doesn't recognize the handwriting, sloping and a little looped, and for most of the class period, he's too bemused to respond. Right before the final bell rings he scrawls, "trig. You?" He leaves the paper on the ledge again. "Algebra 2 :(" is the response.

They keep it up, just a few words at first, before Eddie accidentally doodles on the page, and the other guy scribbles a hasty formula, the math spectacularly wrong. There's a little arrow leading to the words, "this shit sucks." Eddie re-writes the formula with the correct math, leaving careful notations of how and why. The next day he sees, "Shit, dude, I totally get this now. Mundy should retire and let you take over." Which pleases Eddie down to his core.

The messages get longer, nothing super personal, but complaints about life, math help, Eddie's silly little doodles, bad jokes, the slightly lewd drawings typical of teen boys. Eddie's never had a better attendance record in his life, but there are some days where his notes are left unopened. Most remarkably a couple week period before Thanksgiving, where he goes unanswered for so long he figures whatever thing they had going is done. But after the holiday, the notes start up again, with no acknowledgement they ever stopped. Eddie doesn't bother questioning it.

They keep it up almost all year, and they're definitely friends, even though they're totally anonymous. And that wouldn't have changed, except it's the day before spring break and Eddie's vibrating out of his skin with anticipation of the time off, so he forgets his dnd notebook in Mundy's class. He makes it all the way to Click's before he realizes, then sprints back across the school. He crashes through Mundy's door, tripping a little over his own feet.

"Sorry," he pants. "I just left--" he looks over to his desk, far corner right by the window, and then forgets every word he's ever known because Steve Harrington Steve Harrington King Steve, stares right back at him. And he just. He stops and fucking laughs, because all this time--this whole goddamn year--it's been Harrington he exchanged notes with. And sure, the jock's star has fallen in the last few months, with the breakup with Nancy and all that shit with Hargrove, but it's still Steve Harrington. With his big house and his fancy car and his girls. It's pretty Steve Harrington, the focus of Eddie's most hopeless daydreams.

He has a few seconds to see Harrington's hazel eyes go wide, before Eddie spins on his heel and makes a hasty exit. He absolutely doesn't spend the break thinking about the notes, matching what Harrington wrote with the gossip Eddie heard on him from the past few months.

Once break ends, he doesn't bother going to Mundy's class at all.

The Friday of the first week back, Eddie walks out to his van, only to find King Steve leaning up against it. He's doing that obnoxious thing where he has one leg bent, foot resting against the side panel, arms crossed over his chest, stupid hair falling in glorious cascades around his face. It's ridiculously, unfairly attractive.

"What do you want?" Eddie asks. He opens his front door without fully looking at Steve.

"Can we talk?"

Eddie snorts, "what could you and I possibly have to talk about."

Steve narrows his eyes. It's so bitchy and so fucking cute it makes Eddie queasy. "You know what."

"Enlighten me, Harrington."

"C'mon, man, the notes!"

"What about them?

"Don't be stupid, Munson, you know what. Why'd you stop?"

Eddie pulls a pack of camels and his lighter out of his jacket pocket. "Lost its appeal once I knew who was on the other side. Surprised you even want to keep it up now that you know you've been writing to the freak."

He pointedly ignores the little jolt Harrington gives at that, like the words hurt. Which is pretty rich from Steve Harrington, former #1 bully of Hawkins High.

"I've always known it was you," he says.

"You don't--wait what?"

I've known since, like, the first week, Munson."

"How??"

"What do you mean 'how,' dude, you're always drawing little pentagrams and d20's. Writing the word "Slayer" over and over. Who else would it be?"

And he can't even deal with the fact that Harrington knows what a d20 is (what the fuck) with everything else the other boy just said.

"I gotta go," is his only response. He ducks into his van, slamming the door basically in Harrington's face, before peeling out of the parking lot.

✏️✏️✏️✏️

It's the last day of school. Eddie's failed again. His grades, which weren't great to begin with, took a sharp nosedive after spring break, and he just can't wait to be done with this place for a few months. Harrington hasn't spoken to him again, and Eddie tries his hardest to ignore the other boy (aside from seeing him hanging out with Robin Buckley, a junior and a band geek, besides, and he forcibly has to remind himself that he doesn't care what Harrington does).

He slouches into his last math class of the year, slumping over in his seat. He rests his head on his desk, eyes blankly staring out the window as Mundy talks about what a joy most of them were to have in class. His eyes are unfocused, he contemplates a nap, and then he sees it. The tightly folded piece of paper resting on the window ledge.

Eddie almost doesn't take it. He almost ignores it, but he physically can't stop himself for reaching for it, unfolding it, staring at Harrington's now familiar handwriting.

Hey man, I'm pretty sure I fucked things up with us, and I owe you an apology. I've always known who you were, but you had no idea I was me. Buckley helped me see how that maybe freaked you out a little. I know I used to be a piece of shit. But I'm better--or I'm trying to be. And I'm so fucking sorry for the shit I did to you before and the things I didn't bother to stop. You don't owe me forgiveness, but you should know that I regret all of it. I liked passing notes with you. You made me laugh, and I don't know. It was nice to think someone liked me for reasons other than that I'm Steve Harrington, or whatever. I'd really like it if we could be friends. I get if you can't do that or don't want to.

Whatever the note actually ended with is scribbled out in pen so thick Eddie can't make it out.

All day he thinks about the note, the apology, all of it. Eddie thinks, if he's smart, he won't forgive Harrington. That he knows better than to trust him. But Eddie's never actually been that smart in this way, so he's not totally surprised to find himself walking to Steve's car after the last bell rings.

This time, Eddie's the one with his foot resting on the side panel of Steve's BMW, arms crossed over his chest. He doesn't have to wait long before Harrington makes his way to the car, chestnut hair dancing in the breeze, biceps on display in a short-sleeve polo. A little smile dances across his lips when he spots Eddie.

"So, you gonna tell me how you know what a d20 is, Harrington, or do I have to guess?" Eddie offers the other boy a cigarette.

"Babysitting?

"Babys--Are you serious??" Eddie splutters. Steve Harrington babysits. Steve Harrington babysits little dnd playing nerds. Steve Harrington wants to be his friend.

A full grin spreads across Steve's perfect face and Eddie is absolutely, 100%, fucked.

(Part 2)

(Steddie Notes is now posted in full on ao3!)

[buckybarnesss]

If Cora was Stiles' age, wouldn't she have been in his grade before the fire? He knew of Derek and the Hale family but it just seems like Cora was written in last minute.

on this episode of heather versus the teen wolf timeline: cora hale.

here is what the timeline establishes:

all of season 1-3B takes place in 2011.

the hale fire was six years prior to the start of wolf moon. stiles is speaking hyperbolically when he says it was 10 years ago. we know it was six from what derek tells scott in magic bullet.

derek: six years ago, my sister and I were at school, and our house caught fire.

it's established that cora was 11 at the time of the hale fire in 2005. this comes from frayed during her and peter's conversation.

cora:  you've known me for seventeen years! peter: i knew you for eleven, leaving the last six unaccounted for. and i'm not particularly fond of things unaccounted.

she's 17 in visionary.

visionary takes place during the fall 2011 semester of the main pack's junior year.

in comparison to the others:

allison turned 17 in the tell which takes place at the end of january 2011. allison says she was held back due to all the moving around. she's the oldest in their cohort.

lydia turned 17 on march 19th in party guessed during season 2 on the worm moon. we know it was her 17th birthday due to the conversation lydia and natalie have about lorraine's ashes in time of death in season 4 which takes place during the spring semester 2012 of lydia's junior year.

natalie: because she wanted you to do it... when you turned eighteen. don't ask me why. but, since there's only a few weeks 'til that, i suppose now is as good a time as any.

stiles would've turned 17 in april according to his official birthday of april 8th.

scott didn't turn 17 until september as is official birthday is september 16th.

malia turned 17 on november 28th making her the youngest of their cohort.

other odds and ends:

theo was in the fourth grade with stiles and scott making him their age. his birthdate is incorrectly listed as 1998.

jackson was born june 5th so he turned 17 between seasons 2 and 3A.

malia was 9 years old at the time of the car accident that killed her mother and sister which puts it in 2003. 2 years before the hale fire.

now while we can acknowledge the real reasons why cora's timeline is so shaky is because they winged a lot of it but what's the fun in that? here on buckybarness dot tumblr dot com we do teen wolf academia.

now one does wonder how scott, stiles, lydia and isaac didn't know cora but there could be viable reasons for that.

i discovered that the law changed in california in 2000 to raise the kindergarten enrollment age to 5 years old by september 1st. prior to this if a child turned 5 on or before december 2nd they could enroll.

they all would've started kindergarten in 1999.

this might be why scott and malia are in the same school year as lydia and stiles rather than being in the year behind.

if they'd had the foresight they should've had allison turn 18 in season 1 and have her a legitimate full year older than the rest because like she's only 3 months older than lydia so it seems a bit odd she's so embarrassed by turning 17 when she has a birthday so close to lydia and stiles. for someone turning 18 and being a sophomore due to being held back? that'd be embarrassing to someone in the american school system.

now cora could've been born in late 1993 to early-mid 1994. she could've been a grade ahead if she was closer in age to allison than to scott. i do strongly suspect that talia and corrine had overlapping pregnancies and being pregnant at the time is one of the reasons talia coerced corrine into keeping her pregnancy with malia.

the tates could've had malia start school later than the rest because she would've been 4 at the start of the year rather than 5 even if the law at the time allowed it. she just joined the rest as juniors when she returned to society because it made sense to keep her with the friends she'd made and she was 17.

if cora was in the grade above she could've been in middle school while the others were still in elementary school or maybe both malia and cora attended different schools due to zoning.

maybe they were homeschooled.

we'll never really know but it's interesting to think about.

[onlyjaeyun]

ZADIE BABYGIRL THAT CHAP WAS SO GOOD OH MY GOD you always outdo yourself and DELIVER 🤭

I'm so glad you got to rest properly and didn't let any anons with the audacity to rush you and be disrespectful af pressure you!!!

Also, me personally I really love the way yn responded 🥹 like they have both been hurt for SO long and not being able to instantly forgive is one thing and completely fine but I also wouldn't be able to shut my person out any longer after a talk like that and finally getting some clarity.

He still gotta work for the fluff tho if you ask me 🤕 because yes, they did both partake in the bickering and all but for example...yn didn't sexualise Hoonie as far as I remember rn. The way he acknowledged that is also a really nice thing though. We love a king that doesn't deflect his mistakes 🤭

So long story short, I loved the chap baby and I'm so happy that we are back with ch but also!! I hope the two weeks of rest was exactly what you needed and also hope that the next semester isn't going to be stressful right away for you! 🥺

I love you so much and am sending you the biggest forehead kiss rn 🫶🏻🫶🏻💞💞

- 🐍

MY BABY HELLO HI THERE ANGEL LOVE 🥺🥺🥺🥺

thank you SO m uch for this, you're the best and sweetest and i appreciate you so so much 🥺✨🤍☀️

im so glad you enjoyed the chapter too and i cant lie y/n's response was smth i was a little nervous about but seeing you guys back here up like this just made me feel so happy and relieved!!!! they both have a lot of grovelling to do but we're finally getting what we've been waiting dor all this time so we CHEERED!!!😫

sending you the biggest kiss baby, ilysm 💞☁️

[medicallymercury]

Aftershock (06/01/24)

I submitted my final essay for last semester a couple days ago and I finally feel free. If anyone has been paying attention to my real life notes at the start of posts, you’ll have noticed that I’ve been stressing about but not writing my essays for over a month now. Things are suddenly so peaceful. I have learnt nothing about not procrastinating. 

This was supposed to be a normal episode review for last week but devolved into all my Casualty thoughts from the past couple days so like, spoilers for this week and next week at the end and a bit of rambling in the middle. I’m at a weird place with Casualty right now because we’re inching towards me just ignoring canon and pretending that what should’ve happened is happening instead. 

Part 1 - Episode Thoughts:

Goodbye Ryan. Who can say why they gave you and told us your backstory? As he’s leaving he tells them not to forget him and it’s like……..this is Casualty?? The moment you walk out that door, you were never here in the first place. I don’t feel incredibly caught up about him leaving, he was problematic but he was free and I suppose I have to give him that. 

Hello Ngozi. Basically all opposites here: I can’t wait to learn more about her, I will never forget her, I love her, she is perfect and can do no wrong. No thoughts, head empty, just Ngozi. She’s so !!!!! <3 She seems lovely, I’ve been missing ‘lovely from their intro’ characters. I think she has more experience than the others which is interesting too. 

Charlie is a lot more interesting right now than he has been in the whole time I’ve ever watched Casualty. I thought it was because I’ve been watching series 1 (special interest fuel but not as distracting as rewatching recent episodes so I can do other stuff while it’s on) and he’s more interesting in that because they had to actually write a character and couldn’t get away with just dragging him on screen and going “it’s Charlie bros, like if you agree”. But his scene with Ryan was as boring as ever so I think it’s just the influence of Stevie. 

[On the largely unrelated note of old Casualty: it’s super interesting how many of the current plot points and stuff that’s happening in A History of Violence also happened in series 1. Early Casualty has the issue of staff being attacked but no one wants the police around and I’m wondering if this current storyline will be as overtly anti-police as series 1 was. Also, spoilers for this week but the paramedics feel like the new measures haven’t considered them at all, and series 1 Casualty has an episode where the paramedics aren’t included in a meeting and one of them (PLAYED BY ROBERT PUGH AKA GETHIN) feels like the paramedics aren’t being treated like the rest of the staff.]

Faith Stuff™. I am still not interested, please end this Mr BBC. 

Part 2 - Mostly Episode Relevant Teddy Thoughts:

Objectively: It was an episode. He got with Jodie, which probably isn’t that out there. It sure happened.

Subjectively, the good: “Cutting me out of it like that, it shows what she thinks of me” is a great line for exactly what I think is the real issue Teddy has with Jan right now. The wedding is off and Paige acknowledged the issues in their relationship, which is about time. Teddy and Paige were cute in that episode where Teddy is stressing about asking her out but probably doomed from the start. The problems I think they both bring to a relationship aren’t incredibly compatible problems, it was only a matter of time before things started to implode (IF SAH WAS THERE, THOUGH…). I really, really liked how surprised Teddy seems to be that Paige isn’t happy that he only asked her to marry him because Gethin told him to. Yeah, he would be surprised. So many things in his life, if you really think about it, come back to his family (“it’s why I became a paramedic”) to the point that I do think he wouldn't get why it would weird someone out. I also liked that Paige and Sah really don't get how he’s feeling at all, I think what he’s feeling is very specific and different than typical grief and it’s not their fault they can’t really figure out what’s up there because I don’t think he knows either.

Subjectively, the bad: but I didn’t like that ~Jodie understands it~ or whatever. Why? Because her mum died? Well Casualty, I regret to inform you of your own writing, but so did Paige’s mum. Not even as a backstory thing, as a plot thing. I won’t ever be happy about this because I’m ride or die for Sah/Teddy/Paige now, they’re the only thing that could make me happy. Even with just Sah/Teddy it’s like, I wouldn’t actually want them together despite how much I talk about them. They’re my two bros chilling in an ambulance, five feet apart because they have unresolved issues. The Sah and Teddy scene was a let down but whatever (thinly veiled annoyance). Generally, as I said before, it feels like this episode brushed past some interesting ideas but just failed to go there and didn’t let any of the ideas it established sit before having Teddy cheat on Paige (I’m counting it as cheating cause I can). 

Subjectively, the overanalysis: firstly, there’s pacing problems. I think the fact that they didn’t spend enough time developing Teddy’s feelings really didn’t help his part of this episode. One episode exploring Teddy’s feelings about it all, developing that a little, looking into what’s going on underneath and how no one really understands it. Let it rest a bit. Another one for the impact on his relationships, he (ugh) gets with Jodie. I still wouldn’t love it but I think it would feel better developed. Secondly, I just think they underuse the best parts of Teddy to focus on the dramatic parts. They have him do things that aren’t theoretically OOC but are just the most extreme thing he could do and it’s a waste. And they focus on this romance storyline (which they already ruined the moment they decided not to make it a polyamory storyline) that just isn’t that interesting as much as it is dramatic. The most interesting thing about Teddy right now is Jan. With most characters, to say that the most interesting thing about them is a different character would be insulting, but I mean it as a massive compliment to how well written their relationship is and how well they integrated Teddy into Jan’s character, considering he definitely wasn’t part of their original plan for her. I’m sure they will do an episode about Teddy and Jan, because if they don’t that is terrible writing, but I wish this one had given us more on his feelings towards her and about his family than it did. That’s what’s interesting. There’s so many angles to come at this from, there’s so many potential layers to their relationship. But no, they have to have uninteresting romance. If an autistic person with a special interest on a character is bored by the portrayal of that character, that isn’t a great sign. He is very interesting to me but not for reasons canon cares to consider. 

Part 3 - Spoiler Thoughts:

I want to be excited about this week's episode but I’m not sure after last week. I am excited for a Sah and Teddy interaction of actual substance, though. Very excited. That will make or break the episode for me. Will skip straight to it when I watch.

TEDDY INSISTS THAT HE DOESN’T WANT SAH TO LEAVE. MY BELOVEDS.

Lots of paramedic stuff which is good, Jan’s back which is good. Always questioned the use of Sah’s top surgery as a plot device, especially when they used it to create tension between them and Paige (??????), but I am kinda like noooooo about them having Teddy be dismissive about it. Yes, it is just my take on his character that this is an important thing about him, and Yes, he is gonna apologise. But they can’t blame me for caring about Teddy consistently being there for Sah on this when they’ve made so many other characters be vaguely or explicitly transphobic to them and only had Teddy be consistently on their side. YOU CAN’T BLAME ME FOR CARING ABOUT THAT. Teddy in my head would never and he’s the real one now. 

Do I think Sah is gonna leave? Maybe. I’ve been expecting them to leave during this miniseries for a couple reasons, even though that means we have a lot of characters leaving in a few months, but I thought it would happen later on. And two exits in two weeks is a lot. If they leave it’s like, I will absolutely miss them but it feels kinda like the writers don’t know what to do with them anymore anyway. Sah in my head lives on with Teddy in my head. 

Next week’s episode will have Max and Dylan stuff AND an acknowledgement of Donna?? I am kinda excited to see that, even if it will bring back my annoyance at how they wrote Donna’s exit.

Anyway, I’m back to being able to think about Casualty all the time without it having a direct effect on my real life obligations so expect more posts and faster replies for at least a month.

Can you tell I’ve been watching Succession?

[cielomist]

ok more p5 suou au maruki scenario thoughts. this has become more of a plot outline than just miscellaneous thoughts oops.

takes place after the thieves fail to complete maruki's palace in time, so maruki puts akinari to sleep forever and goes forward with altering reality

to keep the thieves from wondering where akinari is and getting sad about his absence, he basically "writes out" akinari's role from their lives, or otherwise substitutes in akechi when he needs a stand-in

"now they won't be sad that their friend is gone, and akechi-san has friends now, so this is a good and logical and moral solution :)"

(^literally just me trying to keep akechi around despite it all but being stated that akechi is only in the 3rd semester in the first place specifically bc maruki brought him back to life for joker's sake, so really would akechi even be kept around in the Joker's Eternal Sleep scenario)

maruki took extra care with the thieves memories so they wouldn't be able to break out of the dream like they did last time and thus won't try to stop him again

shiho was still in sumaru up until maruki rewrote reality; she was not a part of the infiltration of his palace

(she just kinda got transported back to tokyo with no notice when maruki rewrote reality)

because of this he does not know she also has a persona and metaverse access

jun and tatsuya are immune to his actualization bc philemon already tried modifying their memories and if the Divine Guide of Humanity couldn't make that didn't stick then just a guy trying to play god can't do shit

so it is very incredibly noticeable to them when their son just suddenly drops off the face of the earth

when they go to tokyo, any time they try to inquire about akinari everyone just stares blankly at them, before shaking off their daze and smiling and saying "sorry, what were we talking about?"

except for akechi. akechi sees them, stares for a beat, and then just remembers everything because he is a cynical little man so full of anger (especially at the notion of being trapped in maruki's reality) that the second he is reminded of the name suou (and thus the very noticeable absence of one akinari suou) it all just immediately comes back to him

akechi joins the party and starts explaining The Maruki Shit to the suous

when tatsujun see shiho+ann, shiho recognizes jun bc he was her teacher when she was transferred from shujin, and for half a second she remembers that he was also the father of that transfer student everyone was talking about last april, but then that thought slips from her and she spends the rest of the day feeling like she's forgetting something really important, but whenever she tries to bring it up to ann ann just says "oh its probably nothing!" and carries on like everything's fine

when shiho does finally remember, she tries to get ann to remember as well, but no matter what she does or what she says she can't seem to jog ann's memory

she figures since the suou parents are actively looking for their son and ann can't seem to remember akinari beyond incredibly vague recollections, there must be something going on with him specifically and decides to also try to find out where he is and what happened to him

so everyone ends up at leblanc bc where the hell else do you go to look for akinari suou

wakaba is there!! yayy we love wakaba (futaba is ofc with her and they are having a lovely family time)

anyway jun and tats try to get over wakaba being very visibly no longer deceased and are like HEY SOJIRO WHERE THE HELL IS OUR SON

but same weird brushing off and non answer that they got from all akinari's friends

akechi's like Ok anyway. and just goes upstairs since that's where akinari was living. neither of the isshikis nor sojiro seems to acknowledge the existence of the upstairs and seem to stop perceiving akechi the second he starts going up the stairs

and there is akinari! he is asleep and nothing they do can wake him up, but he is most definitely breathing at least

so jun's like So if we beat this maruki guy my son will wake up. right.

and akechi's like Only one way to find out :)

anyway leblanc attic becomes makeshift hideout bc people affected by maruki's actualization can't seem to perceive it, to keep them away from akinari's comatose body

also it's very convenient to have cognitive psience expert wakaba isshiki just downstairs

speaking of wakaba. while cognitive psience hyperspecific hypotheticals aren't uncommon from the kashihara family (well. one specific kashihara), something about jun's specific inquiry causes her to realize she doesn't actually have solid memories of the last 2 years; she knows she somehow managed to find the perfect work-life balance so she has plenty of time to spend with her daughter while also being completely fulfilled by her work, but she can't seem to grasp anything solid

and then she notices the stairs to the attic and is like Huh. wonder why i forgot those are there.

so she goes upstairs while sojiro and futaba are talking and finds tatsujun+akechi+shiho+comatose akinari

and she's like Hi jun did something happen to me a couple years ago? i realized i don't have real memories of the past two years. and your questions about someone being able to theoretically overwrite reality using the cognition of the collective unconscious made me curious.

and jun's like Uh.

and akechi's internally like UH.

and wakaba's like Jun am i supposed to be dead. if yes what happened to futaba

so the party tries to give wakaba the bullet points of what's happening bc frankly if she knows what's happening she might be able to give even better insight on how to deal with whatever maruki's doing

[akechi sitting silently and awkwardly in the background not making eye contact]

so now wakaba is looped in! she agrees to look after akinari while the party deals w maruki

so then the party makes their way to maruki's palace. when they get there akechi just starts yelling for maruki like Maaaarruuukiiiiii come out we just wanna taaaaaallk :) and maybe cause grevious bodily harm :)))))

maruki appears bc he's like well akechi shouldn't remember that this is all fake. oh who are these other people.

and jun's like Hiii i'm jun suou and this is my husband tatsuya. we were looking for our son. akinari :)

and maruki's like Ah. well.

jun: and we noticed he was comatose. :) so i'd like you to wake him up please :)

maruki: i can't do that, the decision on whether to oppose my perfect reality was causing him a lot of grief so :( i had to put him to sleep so he wouldn't be burdened by that anymore :(

and jun's like this is a pretty sad excuse for a perfect reality when my son that i love more than life itself is COMATOSE.

and maruki gets all preachy about his Vision, and in doing so starts talking to/about shiho and "wouldn't it be better if everything with kamoshida never happened?"

shiho now absolutely frozen in place. maruki keeps talking, making himself bascially sound like a saint for "taking her pain away"

shiho gets fed up and snaps bc he didn't even ASK. her whole life has just been people deciding FOR her, her opinions never mattered, she's just always been expected to choke down and accept what The Adults decide is what's best for her with a smile, from her parents to teachers and coaches and every other fucking person besides ann

so shiho gets to snap at maruki for being no different from anyone else in just deciding to make important life decisions for her without bothering to consult her and then she awakens to her ultimate persona :)

anyway maruki probably fucks off around this point bc he now has four extremely pissed off and powerful persona users at his doorstep and he's like Noooo i'm a pacifist :( and he knows he's not gonna convince them to accept his reality peacefully

[tastygoldentaters]

rant time about today's meeting:

I mentioned this before in DMs, but my current team at work feels a lot like Team 7 from Naruto, leading me to channel my inner Kakashi to wrangle those genin. So let me start by introducing the

dramatis personae:

Kakashi-sensei: me, their superior/leader and responsible for both the department and the professional development of staff. Very tired.

Sasuke: our oldest teacher, older than me both in age and company time, but less experienced than me and less qualified both professionally and academically. Believes herself superior to the rest of the team and is reluctant to follow instructions because she assumes she knows better.

Sakura: book-smart but insecure, compares herself to the other two and constantly feels like she's falling behind. Probably has a darker side but doesn't let it show.

Naruto: outstanding potential, self-sabotaged by her need to prove herself and get acknowledged by everyone else. Very childish, but has good intentions.

the mission:

By the end of the first semester, we're supposed to present the children's report cards, with an assessment of their development in class and a small text about each kid in a way that doesn't sugarcoat anything but is also respectful and appropriate.

I had previously presented the template for the report card, explaining item by item, and asked them to fill out a sample report card for the student each of them struggled the most with. They could ask me for help and work together to accomplish this, and present it to me today. My original plan was to use each report card to show how to write about the students, giving them an outline they could follow so they wouldn't struggle as much writing about our 200+ students.

what happened:

Sasuke decided to do everything on her own, without asking for help, and doing more than what she was asked. The end result was good - she really is a competent teacher - but she forgot to look underneath the underneath: there were details she needed to work on to avoid parental wrath (things I saw from miles away due to experience with dealing with parents and doing school admin work, things she has no experience with). She picked an autistic student as her sample report card, and left out key information about his development because she believed it wasn't necessary to explain his development since "his parents know he's autistic and don't expect more than that from him". I gave her some pointers, and she sulked and tried to argue because she "knew better" and it "wasn't necessary".

Sakura struggled with the assignment and didn't ask for help, hiding behind the other two. I told her I'd help her one on one later, because I'm not letting her fall behind but I understand she doesn't want to show the others she's struggling, and she doesn't trust me enough yet to know I won't judge her for struggling (but I do judge her for not admitting she needs help).

Naruto did a good job in filling out the report card, but chose the worst possible wording for the text about the student. She didn't say anything that wasn't true, but she was sloppy in her word choice and that would definitely bring upon us the wrath of the rich private school parents we're dealing with. I showed her how to refine her work, and she was motivated to try again, but made a comment about not being "naturally good at this" as I was. I had to tell her about how much work and practice I put into these skills, and that it seemed easy for me because I knew what I was doing and wasn't just winging it, but that I would show her how to get there.

Overall it was a good meeting, but I know it's going to take a lot of work to get these three to where I need them to be. I had two cans of Monster and now I need some blorbo smut to clear my head so I can go back to genin wrangling tomorrow.

[pups-2-dust]

I was really discouraged from taking science classes in high-school because all the science teachers were super clique-y and I had beef with one of them freshman year and then after that all but one of them would target me :/

[kitashousewife]

low priority

an: to celebrate both of our last years of school, i have wrote this for echo's the best years of our lives collab!!! it is going to be three parts. this is based on my own personal experiences! i hope you all like it :)

pairings: timeskip!tsukishima x fem!reader

warnings: swearing, fluff, tsukki's bad attitude, lowercase intentional

-

one thing about tsukishima is that he loves a schedule. the consistency of it all made him feel secure and made him feel at ease. thankfully, this morning was going exactly according to plan.

his 9:00 lecture ended exactly at 10:00, which meant he had exactly 1 hour and 45 minutes to grab something to eat and get a little bit of work done before he had to walk to his 12:00 class. if he's lucky, his professor will wrap up at 1:30, allowing him to catch the bus at 1:45 to head home, so that he can enjoy his friday evening doing homework with yamaguchi like usual.

of course, it wouldn't be a friday morning without seeing you.

ever since his first year of university, tsukishima has seen you pretty regularly around campus. passing each other on the way to class, sitting near each other in the library, he even saw you at the grocery store a few times. at first, he thought it was just a coincidence in schedules, but after four years now, he isn't sure what to make of this.

he has never talked to you, and you have never spoken to him. hell, you have never acknowledged him. part of him wishes you would, though.

sitting down in the dining hall, tsukishima begins his homework playlist and starts to work. the time seems to be flying by until he hears a voice behind him, distracting his workflow. lowering his headphones, he turns over his shoulder and nearly chokes when he realizes who's talking.

you're sitting directly behind him laughing into the phone that fits perfectly between your ear and shoulder, typing on your laptop while you do so. normally, tsukishima would be incredibly annoyed by this, but he isn't. the sound of your laugh and soft voice actually made him smile.

rolling his eyes at his behavior, he turns his music up and tries to get back to work.

the rest of the day was fine. his class ended right on time, he got to his apartment quickly, and he was able to get to yamaguchi's without any problems. but, now he regrets coming over.

"aww, tsukki's campus crush!" yamaguchi cheers from the kitchen, grabbing chopsticks for their takeout. tsukishima groans into a pillow from the couch. "shut up, yamaguchi. i shouldn't have said anything," he gripes, snatching the chopsticks out of his best friend's hands. "it's not even a crush."

yamaguchi laughs. "is she pretty?"

tsukishima feels his cheeks heating up. looking at his food, he sighs. "yeah, very."

yamaguchi smirks. "right."

-

monday morning came a lot quicker than you had hoped. the weekend is never long enough, especially this semester. as you walked through campus, bleary-eyed and exhausted, you looked up to see him.

headphone guy.

the first time you saw him was in the library four years ago. ever since then, you have seen him everywhere. you don't know anything about him, besides the fact that for four years now, he has worn large white headphones.

and, that he is extremely good-looking.

you pass by each other, like every other monday morning, without a word.

after class, you can't seem to get him out of your head. he looked so handsome, with his rimmed glasses and blonde hair, and he seems so serious. you've seen him study some pretty impressive science textbooks, too. he must be intelligent.

walking into the bookstore on campus isn't helping your thoughts. as you shuffle through the isles for a specific book you need for class, there he is.

standing directly in front of your section, he flips through a book mindlessly. his headphones are draped around his neck, the very faint sound of music whispers through them.

"excuse me," you squeak, cringing at your attempt. tsukishima looks down at you at you and doesn't say a word.

okay asshole.

"i-i'm looking for a book,"

"obviously," he interjects, still staring at you. you cock an eyebrow at him. what is this guy's problem?

giving him the benefit of the doubt to save the image of him you made in your mind, you start again. "it's for my psychology class this semester. i didn't know i needed it, it wasn't required," mumbling the last part, you step forward to scan through the book spines.

tsukishima watches intently, suppressing a chuckle as you grab the book you need and mutter a finally under your breath.

"is that for psych 325?" you nod. "it was required actually. it's in the first section of the syllabus,"

your eyebrows shoot up, only to lower back down into a low glare. "no it wasn't, i checked."

he smirks down at you, pushing his glasses back up his nose with the back of his knuckle. you are about to disintegrate on the spot.

"well," he sighs, looking for his own book. "i'm the TA for that class this semester,"

you blink. twice. three times.

"what section?"

he turns on his heel and begins to walk out of the isle, book in hand. he looks over his shoulder at you. "section 8."

no fucking way.

you walk after him as he heads to the checkout counter. shaking your head in disbelief, you finally catch up to him. "you're tsukishima?"

he nods, grabbing his wallet to pay for his book.

"but you aren't in my class."

placing his receipt in the book cover, he turns to you and adjusts his headphones. "i don't need to be there, i just help grade and upload assignments from time to time."

paying for your own, apparently required book, you start to feel a little sheepish.

"after all these years," you mumble to yourself.

stopping midway from putting on his headphones, it's his turn to cock an eyebrow.

and he wouldn't admit it, but he really hopes he heard you correctly.

"what did you say?" you pause, then adjust your backpack.

"nothing, i was just talking to myself," you look away, fixing your eyes on anything but his brown ones.

walking towards the door, you both want and don't want him to follow you.

he does.

"do you know me?" he asks, holding the door open for you. walking out, you wait for him to join you outside.

"no, but i've seen you around campus a few times," you aren't technically lying. but you aren't going to admit that you've been staring at him for the past four years. he hums back.

tsukishima's just as stubborn as you, if not more so. the last thing he's going to do is tell you that he has been thinking about you for the past eight semesters, even telling his best friend about you.

standing in silence, the two of you stare at your feet as the autumn breeze kicks up around you. clearing your throat, you look up at him once more.

the midday sun dances across his cheeks and hair, the strands looking almost white in the rays. he looks down at you before you have time to look away.

"you know, just because we spoke, please don't expect any special treatment in the class," he sighs and pulls his headphones over his ears. rolling your eyes, shake your head at him.

"obviously."

he chuckles at your imitation of him earlier. feeling his heartbeat quicken once more, he turns to you before he walks to the bus stop.

"the class is challenging, so don't be afraid to reach out. my phone number is on the syllabus, along with my email," he says, grabbing his phone to press play on his playlist. looking at you again, he bites tongue as you are staring back at him with wide eyes and blushing cheeks.

"for academic purposes, of course."

tsukishima walks away, hoping you don't catch how nervous he actually is. he can't believe he said that. yamaguchi is gonna love this.

your thoughts are racing, far too quickly for this monday afternoon. beginning the walk to your apartment, you shake the thoughts that sneak their way into your head.

where was that syllabus again?

[mackenzielovee]

my girl (part 4) - rafe cameron

a/n: SURPRISE! I wrote a part 4 ;) i had this idea right after i said i was only doing 3 parts - but this really is the final one! I really hope ya'll enjoy. It's a little shorter than the rest! (not my gif)

Summary: Nope sorry you have to read!

Warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, kissing, and test anxiety

Word Count: 4.4k

series masterlist

my writing

Your phone buzzing on your nightstand distracts you get again from cramming for your Chemistry final. The exam happens in two days, yet you feel like it might as well be in two hours with the amount of anxiety you have. It's your second year of college, and boy, it hasn't gotten any easier. Thankfully, your roommate is out for the night so you have your entire dorm to yourself to study.

You lean over and check your phone. Another missed call from your fiancee, Rafe. Beside your phone on your nightstand sits your engagement ring. You stare at it for a moment and swallow your feelings, then move back over to your chemistry textbook. Your phone buzzes again - a voicemail from Rafe this time, which you don't bother to listen to.

Chemistry is your focus tonight. Chemistry is what you need to be studying for, what you need to know inside and out. You throw yourself back into it, shutting off your phone when it buzzes yet again. You need absolutely zero distractions.

About twenty minutes into it, you hear a loud knock on the door. You sigh, figuring your roommate forgot her ID or keys again. You pull open the door and sigh, fully shocked when you find Rafe standing at your door. He's out of breath from running inside from the parking lot, and he looks pissed off.

"Oh, good, you're alive," he snaps, pushing his way into your room before you can even invite him.

"What are you doing here?" you ask him, closing the door so none of your nosy neighbors can listen to yet another argument between the two of you.

Things haven't been good. You're sick of him calling and texting you all the time, him begging you to come home, and constantly asking who you're with when you go out. On top of all of that, your classes this semester are harder than they've ever been, but Rafe never respects when you say you need space and time to study.

"Checking to see if my fucking fiancee is breathing!" he shouts, throwing his hands up in the air, "I mean, shit, Y/N, I called you, like, twenty times."

You glance over to the nightstand at your phone, realizing your ring was over there, too. You know he won't like that.

"I shut my phone off. I really need to study, Rafe," you tell him, but he's not listening.

Instead, he collapses onto your bed and puts his head in his hands, sitting directly on your Chem textbook and notes.

"Oh, my God, what the hell? Get up," you snap at him, walking over and pushing him off so he doesn't ruin your notes or textbook pages.

"It's fucking fine," he replies as he stands, barely glancing at your papers.

"No, it's not. I need this shit to pass my exam-" you hold the wrinkled papers up.

"They're literally fine, Y/N," his voice raises, "Stop being so dramatic."

You take a deep breath before you speak again, knowing whatever comes out will not be very nice. You've really been trying to be patient with him, but it's getting harder and harder.

"I'm not being dramatic, Rafe," you say calmly, "I just really need to study and I need peace and quiet."

He sighs and rubs the back of his neck as he debates what to say next. Neither of you want to start a fight, but you both have a lot of shit to say. His eye catches the shiny object on the nightstand and he looks over, figuring out it's your engagement ring.

"What the fuck?" he gasps, picking it up and holding it out to you, "Since when do you take this off?"

You put your hands on your forehead and sigh, realizing this is going to take up a lot of time that you don't have. And the fact that Rafe drove eight hours on a whim because you didn't pick up his calls all day has made you crazy.

"I cannot do this with you right now," you tell him, stepping toward your Chemistry stuff.

You'll just have to go to the library and study if he's going to be here. There's no way you can get any of your shit done with him bitching about your ring.

"Oh, my bad, when can you do it, then?" he rolls his eyes, "Huh? Can you give me, like, a window of time where you're actually available to talk?"

"Rafe-" you start, but he holds his hand up.

"No, because, I mean, I don't hear from you all day, and I'm fucking worried about you, so I make the long ass drive to come check on my soon-to-be wife, and now I'm the bad guy? Yeah, no, I get it now!" he exclaims.

"Jesus, okay, I have to go," you say, grabbing your backpack from the floor and sliding some slippers on.

"Right, to study," he grumbles.

"Yeah, to study," you snap back, "Just because you didn't go to school doesn't mean you can't at least try to understand!"

You rarely raise your voice at him, so Rafe knows you're mad. He stares at you for a second, deciding if he should acknowledge your comment about him not attending school.

"It's not about whether or not I understand, it's about time management," he lectures, making you roll your eyes, "Don't roll your fucking eyes at me."

"Don't show up at my dorm unannounced!" you yell back.

"I wouldn't have been unannounced if you would answer your goddamn phone!"

You take a deep breath and exhale loudly, then step closer to the door. Rafe walks over to you and grabs your arm, spinning you around. You stare up at him like he's crazy, he's never laid a hand on you like that before.

"Put your ring back on," he demands, holding it out in his hand.

"What the fuck is your problem, Rafe? You think I'm gonna get hit on walking to the damn library? Get a grip," you mutter, trying to yank your arm from his grasp but failing.

"I'm not playing," he tells you, holding the ring up in his other hand.

"Neither am I," you snap, "Let go of me."

He stares at you for another few seconds and then releases you, groaning loudly when he does. He steps away from you and runs his hand through his hair, then sets your ring back down on the nightstand.

"What's going on with us?" he grumbles, sitting down on your bed again.

You start to feel bad as you look at him, so you step closer and set your books down on you desk. You open your mouth to speak, to apologize and return your ring to your finger, when he speaks out again.

"Why didn't you answer the fucking phone when I called?"

You close your mouth quickly, swallowing the words you were about to say. You stare at him for a moment, then you decide that it's just best to tell him the absolute, stone cold truth.

"Because I have shit going on, Rafe. I have a Chem final in two days and I'm not at all prepared, I have other finals and an entire paper due by the end of the week, and I have you up my ass about everything in between and it's just a little overwhelming right now."

He brings his head out of his hands and looks up at you. His expression changes from hurt to angry in about one second, so you brace yourself.

"So what do you want me to do to help you, then?" he asks, his voice agitated. You can tell he's trying to be patient, but he really wants to yell.

"I just need you to give me some space right now," you state.

He nods his head, moving his eyes away from yours and down to the floor.

"Space," he repeats, "You want space."

You nod your head slowly, afraid now to speak. You can't tell what his reaction is about to be, but obviously it isn't going to be a good one.

"So, you ignore my phone calls," he holds up one finger, "You take off your engagement ring," another finger, "And now you want space. Do you think I'm a fucking moron?"

He stands up off the bed, now towering over you. Your hands come up to your face, rubbing your eyes to try and relieve some form of stress.

"God, Rafe, you're making this out to be something it's not-"

"Am I?" he shouts, "Do you want to marry me or not? I mean, I really think that's what this boils down to. Am I what you want, or not?"

His yelling combined with your stress and confusion makes you yell back at him.

"I don't know!"

He steps back, almost like you've hurt him, and stares at you with a look you've never seen before. It's anger, betrayal, confusion, and sadness all rolled into one, heartbroken expression. It makes your stomach turn thinking about the fact that you're hurting him.

"Well, there it is," he says, his voice cracking, "I'll just get out of your way, then."

He leans down and grabs the ring from your nightstand, wrapping his large hand around it and then stepping toward the door.

"Rafe, wait," you say, "Where are you going to go? You can't drive home in the dark."

He doesn't turn around, he can't look at you. Not when you're not sure what you want.

"I'll sleep in the truck," he says, his voice weak and quiet.

"No," you protest, "Rafe, I'm sorry."

He stands there for a few seconds, then turns, and you see the tears in his eyes. One has fallen, and rests on the bottom of his cheek. He wipes it away, but not quick enough.

"Why are you sorry? I'm not what you want anymore," he laughs, but nothing is funny.

Another tear falls and you step forward quickly, reaching up to wipe it away. He closes his eyes under your touch, always loving feeling your skin on his.

"I didn't say that," you say gently, tears welling in your eyes from seeing him like this.

"Just..." he trails off, finally opening his red eyes, "Go ace your Chem final. I'll see you at home in a few days."

He reaches up and grabs your hand, removing it from his cheek. He lays a quick kiss on your knuckles, then closes his eyes again when he lets go of you. Not sure if it's his last time feeling you.

He turns to leave, opening the door up before he turns back to you.

"I love you. I always will."

He doesn't wait for your response, he just closes the door behind him. You turn and look at the nightstand where your ring once sat, wishing to God that it was still there. You want to tun after him, but you know you can't. You two just need some cooling off time, you tell yourself. You'll come back again atfer finals when you get home for Christmas break. He'll hold onto your ring for you, you convince yourself of that.

You can't focus. The next day, you spend all your time in the library, staring at a page in your Chem textbook, and all you can focus on is your empty finger. No pretty ring that reflects every ounce of Rafe's love for you. You check your phone, but all you see is an empty screen. Your wallpaper is a cheesy picture of Rafe holding a wine glass. You took it on your anniversary last year and love everything about it, especially his cheesy grin.

Tears start to form in your eyes, so you do what you have to do. You call him. It rings and rings and rings, then you hear his familiar, raspy voice on his voicemail.

Yo, it's Rafe. Leave a message and I might hit you back.

You close your eyes, those two sentences being the most you've heard from him in almost twenty-four hours.

"Hey," you start your message, "Look, I'm sorry about last night. I really want to talk. Please call me back. Love you, bye."

You sigh and hang up the phone, then look down to your book again. You try and try to focus, but you can't. It just is impossible with everything spinning around your brain. You can still see the look on his face when you said you weren't sure, you can still hear him say 'I love you' right before he left.

And it's all you want to hear again.

You slam your book shut and grab your stuff, then make your way out of the library. Once you get outside, you call Rafe again. You hear the same ringing and the same message from his voicemail, so you leave another.

"Baby, please call me. I'm worried about you. I just want us to talk. Please call. I love you."

You hang up and walk back to your dorm, checking every five seconds to see if he's called you back. You really just want to hear his voice, to apologize, and to be able to focus on Chemistry again. Knowing that Rafe is out there hurting is just too distracting.

You call hm again after you get back to your dorm, giving him about thirty minutes to call back before you try him again. When he doesn't answer, you leave another message.

"Hey," you say, your voice sounding more desperate, "I'm going to call Dad and have him come get me. I'm skipping out on my Chem final. I just want to come home and work things out with you. Call me, please. Love you."

And you mean every word. You sit down on your bed and you remember how Rafe had helped you move in on your first day of freshman year. You remember how he made love to you and how he proposed to you in the parking lot before he left. And you remember all the times he came to visit and you two laid in bed and planned out your whole wedding reception together, laughing and joking about who to invite and who to sit together.

As you sit there and remember it all, remember the kisses and the laughs and the feelings you have when you're with him, you've never been more sure in your life. It's Rafe. It will always be Rafe.

You hear a knock on your dorm room door and hop out of bed, rushing over to it. It's him, you hope. Coming to rescue you, coming to hold you, coming to give you your ring back. You pull open the door with a big smile, only to find your roommate, Alex, standing on the other side.

"Hey," she says, looking confused at why you opened the door like that, "Sorry. I forgot my keys."

You drop your shoulders and nod, moving her out of the way. She leaves the door open as she moves over to her side of the room to search for them. You sit back down on your bed, checking your phone once again. He has to call back eventually.

"You're not ditching your Chemistry final."

You look up and see him, standing in the doorway, staring at you. His eyes are tired, his hair is a mess, and he looks like he's hung over. You don't even want to know where the hell he's been for the past day.

"Rafe," you breathe, hopping up from your bed.

You want to throw your arms around him, hug him, and have you hold him. He stops you when you get close to him, holding out his hand to keep distance between the two of you, which practically breaks your heart in two.

"You're not coming home until you take that test," he repeats, "You've been studying for it and if you don't take it, you fail. So, you're staying. I called your dad."

You frown. This is not how you imagined it. He seems colder somehow.

"Okay," you say, "Fine. But I want us to talk."

Rafe shakes his head, leaning against the doorframe. Alex walks up behind you, whispering she will be back later, and leaves with a quick smile to Rafe.

"I'm giving you your space so you can focus. We'll work on us when you're done with the semester."

He sounds firm, but you know you can win this one. You step forward, so close that he can almost feel your skin on his. Your scent fills the air, and you watch as he swallows his feelings.

"Rafe," you say, your voice soft, "I can't focus on anything knowing that I hurt you. I need to talk about us and figure things out. Please."

"Baby," he sighs, and you know you've won just by the return of your nickname. It's your favorite, which is why he calls you it so often.

"Please," you say, taking his hand. Your fingers wrap through his, pulling him inside.

He groans but enters anyway, both of you knowing that he would do anything for you. The door closes behind him, which you're thankful for. You sit him down on your bed and instantly crawl onto his lap, not caring if that's what he wants or not. That's what you need. Your head buries into his chest and your arms wrap around his neck.

"Baby," he says again, this time with more authority.

You bring your lips up to his neck to soften him up, listening to the small moans that come out of his mouth as you work.

"Rafe," you say against his skin, "I'm so sorry for what I said yesterday."

He hums, so you give him a few more kisses on his neck before you pull back to look at him. He stares at you with soft eyes, and you know you've already won him over. But you still need to say what you need to say.

"Truly, baby. I was wrong. I was angry. You are all I want in this world and I couldn't handle any of this without you. I was acting extremely ungrateful and I'm really, really sorry," you continue, watching him smile sadly at you.

"Well," he smirks, moving his hands from your back down to your butt, "I've always known you're a brat, so."

"Hey," you pretend to pout, but really, you just want a kiss. He gives you a slow, gentle one, one that makes you want to melt into him.

"You are the love of my life," he says, "You could never say anything to make me walk. And I'm sorry for being such a dick yesterday and for not respecting your school. I'm gonna get better. This shit is just hard for me, having you all the way here. I just miss you when I'm home."

You nod, reaching up and brushing his hair away from his eyes with your fingers. Even when he hasn't showered, is in the same clothes as yesterday, hasn't styled his hair or even slept well, he still is the most handsome to you.

"I understand. I'm sorry for being so hard on you," you say, kissing him on the cheek.

He smiles against your lips, bringing his hands up to your face to move you down to his lips.

"Are we okay?" he asks you in between kisses.

You hum against his lips, and he takes that as a yes, so he flips you over and lays down on top of you, kissing you like his life depends on it. He quickly moves down to your neck, his hands going underneath your shirt.

"Oh, my God, I missed you, baby," he tells you as you feel him leaving a hickey on your neck.

"Always marking me up," you laugh at him, feeling him smirk against you, "I missed you, too."

"It killed me not calling you back," he continues against your neck, "But I wanted to do right by you, you know?"

You gasp when he bites you slightly, then laugh when you feel his big grin on your neck.

"That's why I love you the way I do," you say sweetly.

He sits up and looks down at you, smirking widely, "Can you love me like you do right now and then get back to your studying?"

You bite your lip and nod, pulling him back down on top of you.

A little while later, you and Rafe lay naked in your bed, just breathing in the other. Rafe is drawing hearts into the skin on your stomach, leaving little kisses every so often on any inch of skin he could reach with his mouth.

"You need to get back to studying," he says, but doesn't stop with his kisses.

"Can I have my ring back first?"

He looks up at you with wide eyes, wondering if you really mean it. He didn't want to bring up the ring, just in case you had changed your mind about the engagement.

"You sure?" he asks quietly.

You grab his chin and pull him up to you, stroking his hair as you give him a couple quick kisses.

"I've never been more sure of anything," you tell him.

He nods and kisses you again, then hops off the bed and pulls the ring out of the zipped up pocket of his shorts. He grins at you and then jumps back in bed, of course landing on you when he does.

"This is a twin bed, you ogre. You can't be jumping and shit, there's not enough room for you!" you say as you try to free your left side from underneath him.

He moves and lets you get situated, then holds out the ring. You hold up your left hand for him ti put it on you once again.

"Will you marry me?" he asks, and you would've laughed at him if his voice wasn't so gentle and nervous.

"Of course I will, Rafe Cameron," you tell him, smiling.

He slides your ring back on your finger and you somehow feel more complete, more whole, knowing it's there.

"It's never coming off again," you tell him, meaning it.

He kisses you softly, "No, it's not."

Rafe takes a shower and then hangs out on your bed on his phone later on to keep himself occupied while you study for Chem at your desk. You ask him to quiz you and he does, even though he knows nothing about Chemistry.

It gets late, so you tell him you'll study the rest tomorrow and hope to be prepared the following day for the exam. You put your book and notes on your desk, then slide into bed with Rafe, who you made stay with you tonight. Although it didn't take much convincing.

"I can't believe your dad is just letting you take all this time off," you mumble against his chest.

"Hmm," Rafe hums, so you know you're wrong, "I've kinda been dodging his calls."

"He'll be mad," you tell him, and he nods.

"I don't care, though. I got what I came here for."

You spend all day the next day studying in the library for Chem and writing your paper, while Rafe packs your things for you. He figures it's one less thing for you to worry about, and then you can just come with him after you finish your exam. He had told you he wanted to be the one to bring you, his soon-to-be wife, home.

Rafe waits for you outside your building on exam day. One by one, students file out of the building, and he gets even more anxious every time you aren't one of them. Eventually, he stops pacing and sits down on a bench, praying that you do well.

He sees you emerge from the building with only ten minutes to spare, and jumps up to greet you.

"So?" he asks, his voice hopeful.

"I won't know for a few days," you tell him, "But I'm confident. I felt like I had most of it under control."

He smiles, taking your hand in his and kissing it, "I'm so proud of you, baby."

You smile and thank him, then put your head on his chest in hopes that he'll wrap his arms around you. With the amount of stress you've been under the past few days, all you want is just for him to hold you right now.

"I'm so proud of you," he repeats, swallowing you up in his arms.

You breathe in his scent and relax, knowing that even if you fail every class you ever take for the rest of your life, you will always have a place in the arms of this boy.

After a few minutes, you move to look up at him by resting your chin on his sternum, staring up at him. He smiles down at you, running a hand through your hair as an attempt to calm you down.

"Take me home, Rafe," you tell him quietly, and he nods.

He reaches down and takes your hand, leading you away from the building. You two go back and grab the remaining items you need to bring home, the rest Rafe already packed in the truck, and then go out to the parking lot to head home.

You feel relieved, ready to spend some quality time with Rafe and really make sure to work on things so that nothing ever gets bad between the two of you again.

He puts you into the truck and closes your door, then hops into the driver's side. He reaches over and takes your hand, staring at the ring on your finger and smiling softly.

"Let's just elope and get it over with," he looks up at you, already laughing because he knows you'll never agree.

"Yeah, I'm glad our wedding is something you just wanna get over with," you roll your eyes, but can't help your smile.

"You know what I mean," Rafe groans, "We don't need all the bullshit and the drama. I just need you. And a minister."

You laugh at him and nod, understanding what he means. He looks down at your hand in his, at the diamond on your finger, and so do you. You honestly can't remember why you took it off, you just know you never will again.

"A small wedding it is," you whisper.

He leans over and gives you a kiss. Then another. Then another. He pulls away and starts the truck, then looks back over a you.

"Baby, I'll do whatever you want."

That sentence combined with the cheesy smile he gives you afterward is what convinces you that, no matter what, Rafe will always be yours, and you will always be his.

Tags: @cmrxac

[weezerblue]

friends, best friends

description: steve is just being a good friend, or at least that's what he calls it

includes: friends with benefits to lovers, hickeys, smutty stuff in general

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

"it'll be fine, his class wasn't even that bad when I was still in it"

he handed your lunchbox to you and sat down at the table. you notice him staring at you but decide to ignore it.

"it's easy for you to say 'cause you left in the first semester-"

he cuts you off with a kiss.

"what was that for!"

you look around at all the people, the people who are probably staring at you thinking 'those two are so disgusting'

he pulls you closer to him and laughs.

"what? I can't love my best friend anymore?"

as he said those words your embarrassment turned into sadness. all you wanted was for him to at least acknowledge your feelings and you'd be fine with him not even liking you back! well not really but at least you wouldn't have to wonder if he did.

and it's almost as if he reads your mind.

"so... i have something to tell you"

"oh no- goddamn i knew this day was coming. i know you don't like me, i shouldn't have even started this stupid friends with benefits thing anyway-"

he cuts you off with another kiss before laughing.

"no sweetheart, that's not what i was gonna say, its the opposite actually"

he says, enthusiastically.

"i- but you-"

"i just didn't think you'd wanna be more than friends... and in my defense you weren't being that obvious about it either"

"its alright. we can talk about it later, anyways wanna go kick the janitor out again?"

occasionally all the time, you two would fuck in the janitors closet which usually meant you'd tell him someone threw up in the cafeteria then when he rushes to go clean it up, unintentionally leaving the door open you'd sneak in there but usually, that only gave you enough time for a quickie.

this time though, someone actually did throw up so you had time today.

you both put your bags down and you sit on top of the gigantic tower of boxes in the corner, forming the perfect position for steve to eat you out.

he crouches down on the floor at your knees and pulls your skirt up. then taking off your panties and shoving them in his pocket, "for later" he says with a smile. you lean against the wall and look away from him.

"hey. eye contact, pretty girl"

he rests his hands on your waist to angle you closer to his face. almost immediately his lips wrap around your clit, making a surprised moan fall from your lips, he shushes you.

"don't let the poor old janitor hear you, sweetheart"

he laughs, going back to work on your clit, this time you put your hand over your mouth in a failed attempt to somewhat hide your moans. to your dismay though, he stops and sits up on top of the boxes beside you.

he pulls you into his lap with his head resting on your shoulder and one of his hands around your waist, he pushes 2 of his fingers in you with his free hand as his thumb rubs circles on your left thigh.

you feel them slowly drag in and out of you.

"please?"

"please what, honey i am touching you aren't i? isn't this what you wanted?"

steve kisses your neck multiple times definitely leaving marks, pretending he doesn't know what you're talking about. you whine as he finally speeds up the pace after a few agonizing minutes of you straight up begging for him to speed up at least a little.

"c- ah~ close-"

his pace never falters though, fingers somehow reaching the deepest parts of you.

so it doesn't take you that much longer to cum. he helps you ride out your orgasm, slowing down and coming to a stop after a while.

"you okay? oh don't fall asleep on me now, we still have 5th period to get to"

you don't listen to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and cuddling him, still not wanting to let go.

steve looks at your neck, deciding he doesn't feel like explaining the very noticeable hickeys to anyone, especially the teachers.

he just sighs and listens to the bell ring. he'll wake you up later.

a/n: finished on sep 24 at like 7:30 i'm kinda proud of this one y'all🥳 ok purr its giving professional

[hammondshottie21]

Now You're For It

Warnings:- The worst here is an obvious Authority kink and Abuse of Power. After that anything else is just implied or open to the reader’s imagination. Still as with everything I write it’s 18+ only. Warnings are given, so if you don’t like it, don't read. Feedback is welcomed.

By proceeding you are acknowledging that you are over 18 and are consenting to the content below the cut.

Author’s Note:- @nsfwsebbie got this little idea when you spoke of writing during class (you naughty girl). Anyway with a nod to your concepts and fics I hope this little piece brightens your day.

Pairings:- Professor! Bucky Barnes, Professor!Steve Rogers, Professor!Ransom Drysdale x Named Female Character (open to the reader’s imagination).

Total Word Count: 1,214

Standing before him twirling your hair around a slender finger, you waited for the final dregs of your classmates to leave while Professor Barnes sat silently before you flicking through the latest batch of assignments. Letting out a little squeak as the heavy door finally closed behind you, you continued to stand and stare in silence as his imposing figure rose from the desk and his icy stare settled on you.

Watching you squirm as a smirk played across his lips, he finally broke the silence as he ordered you to follow him through the other available door that you knew led to his office. Ushering you inside as he quietly locked the door behind him, he directed you to sit before dropping his ass onto the desk before you. Watching as you smoothed out the end of your summer dress, he gave you a few minutes to compose yourself before speaking. "Alright young lady, hand it over." he said, extending his hand as his eyes locked on your innocent face.

"Sir?" you questioned, once again wondering what you had done to land yourself here.

"Don't 'Sir' me, Sabrina. Not yet anyway." he uttered. "The phone. NOW." he continued, flexing his fingers impatiently.

Reaching into your bag, you removed the item and handed it over before realizing he must have figured out what you had been doing during his lecture. Watching as he powered it up, your voice shook slightly as he asked you for the passcode. Calling it out as heat radiated throughout your body and an ache began between your thighs, your eyes focused on the floor as he walked behind you while scrolling through your recent activity. Coming to a stop behind you and bringing the phone into your field of vision, an audible gulp left your throat as your recent Tumblr post appeared before your eyes.

Scrolling through your little concept as his warm breath ghosted over your now fevered skin, his next words told you just how much trouble you were in. "So princess, this is what's more interesting than listening to me trying to expand your mind, huh?" he questioned and you found yourself unable to answer as the phone disappeared and he came to stand before you once more. "Tell me, my not-so-innocent girl, how would you deal with this situation if you were in my shoes?"

"Start with a more fashionable pair of shoes probably." you muttered but swiftly regretted your remark when his hand shot out and stretched your chin up as high it would go.

"Don't get smart with me right now or we'll put that mouth to better use." he barked as his thumb came up to caress your lower lip before pushing hard against your mouth and pressing down on your tongue. Moaning as he began rubbing circles into it, you wondered how you were supposed to follow his next command as his lips rested against your ear and his words echoed through your brain. "Answer me, pet. What would you do?"

Taking in some much needed air as he released your chin and sat back on his desk, you failed to notice the growing ridge in his jeans as you thought properly about your answer. "Probably just give them a verbal warning, Sir," you answered meekly before continuing, "maybe even some lines, I guess?" you questioned innocently, knowing that you were more or less picking out your own punishment.

"Lines?" he scoffed, seriously questioning if you thought that appropriate or if you hoped he would go easy on you. "And let's say I gave you lines, who's to say you'd actually write them or I wouldn't find you once again letting your hormones rule your better judgement?" he asked as he waved your phone in front of your face before placing it on the desk. "No, I think I can find a much more appropriate lesson for you princess." he smirked as his hand reached forward to rest along your thigh.

Whimpering slightly as his fingers squeezed while his hand moved ever closer to the area that was aching for his touch, your eyes widened in utter horror when the previously locked door opened and in walked Professors Rogers and Drysdale.

"Ah gentlemen, perfect timing. I was just about to teach our girl a lesson in listening." he greeted before kissing you quickly and then sitting back up to face his colleagues. "Drysdale lock the door will you. Here Rogers, take a look at this." he said, staring at you as Ransom did as he was told and Steve took the offered phone. "As you can see by the date on those posts this has been going on all semester. In your classes too I suspect." he continued as Ransom helped himself to a drink while Steve looked between you and your phone.

"Oh angel, is this true?" Professor Rogers asked as he handed your phone to Professor Drysdale so he too could get a look at the sexual fantasies your young mind had conjured up while Steve focused his blue eyes on your apprehensive face.

"Ha look, there's one here about me." Ransom suddenly boomed out and as Bucky and Steve ran a hand over their faces, you sat quietly in the chair between all three of your handsome professors and wished the earth would swallow you whole since you knew there was no way to refute the evidence now stacked against you. That was not to be however when Ransom tossed your phone to Professor Barnes and moved to stand behind you.

Leaning down to run his lips along your neck, you left out a whimper as his arrogant voice reached your ear. "Is that really how you see me, little dove?" he asked, but you failed to answer as him biting your earlobe sent you jumping from the chair straight into Professor Barnes' waiting arms.

Laughing out loud and taking the chair you had just vacated as Bucky ran his hand along your back, Steve took charge of the situation and addressed the man holding you to his chest. "So Barnes, you're the one who discovered this infraction and called us. How do you want to handle this?"

Raising your chin and kissing your forehead, a smirk played across his lips as a wicked idea formed in his mind. "How about we start with her newest creation and see where we go from there." he suggested, looking between you and the other participants in your future humiliation.

Nodding his head in agreement as he began to remove his clothes, Ransom meanwhile rose from the chair to follow suit, but not before giving his own edict. "Sounds good to me Barnes, but from now on little dove it's front and center in class for you," he informed you before searching out your panties and ripping them from you, "and you won't be needing these in future either," he continued, tossing the offending item over his shoulder as both the other men agreed.

Gulping then as Bucky held your arms while Steve peeled you out of your dress, you wondered how you had landed yourself in this situation and more importantly how you were supposed to survive it as three sets of hungry eyes now feasted on your ethereal form.

Tagging: @nsfwsebbie

[ming-yu-hao]

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder | Chapter 3

Pairing: fratboy!mingyu x female reader

Word Count: 6k

Synopsis: When you transferred to a different university, you and Wonwoo promised that you would make long distance work. But distance proves to be more difficult than you both originally thought.

This Chapter’s Tags: angst, protected sex, finger sucking, grinding, light choking/spanking/dirty talk, mingyu just being an ass man, riding, cheating obviously

Warning: THIS SERIES IS ABOUT CHEATING. DO NOT READ IF IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE!

A/N: Y’ALLLLL I’m sorry this took me forever to upload... I just got super busy but there won’t be as long as a wait for the next chapter! As always feedback is appreciated and I hope you guys like this :)

Chapters: Previous | Next | Masterlist

Your knees quivered beneath you as you pulled the soft fabric of your leggings up your thighs and over your hips. You bent down to pick up your shirt that was still balled up on the floor, and when you stood again you could hear the bed rustle behind you as Mingyu shifted his weight.

Guilt didn't hit you until you slipped your shirt back over your head, fully dressing yourself once again.

What had you done?

Without looking at him, you spoke: "I think I should go now."

He was silent.

You stepped over to the door, your hand about to twist the knob when he finally called out to you.

"Y/N."

You looked at him. He was sitting up on his bed; his dark hair was a mess, hanging over his forehead. His lips were parted like he didn't know what to say.

"Um, don't forget your jacket. It's cold outside." He pointed to your jacket that was still discarded on the floor.

"Oh, thanks," you said with your voice wavering. You quickly picked up the jacket and headed for the door again.

"Text me when you get home, okay?" Mingyu rushed to say. The corners of his mouth quirked up into a thin, awkward smile and you nodded your head in response.

Why did he suddenly care? He used to just be some guy you sat next to in class. When did he want to become your friend? When did he start to become protective over you? Was this all really just because of his half-drunken encounter with you at that party? Did the moment you two shared that night cause him to feel some kind of attachment to you? Thinking about it all made your head spin. Nothing made sense to you anymore.

You turned the knob and cracked open the door when Mingyu spoke again.

"Um, also... you know, if you ever need anything... I'm here for you." His voice shook a bit.

You exhaled. "Thank you."

You slipped out of his room before he could say anything else and stepped down the stairs quietly, attempting to dart out the front door before anyone could see you. There was a small group of people hanging out in the living room like Mingyu had said, their laughter and conversations loud and echoing through the house.

When you reached the bottom of the stairs, you kept your gaze down at your feet while you scanned the floor for your shoes.

"Y/N?" You heard a voice call from behind you.

You huffed out a quiet breath in frustration before turning around with an overly sweet smile on your face. Your eyes landed on Seungcheol.

"Oh, hey! It's weird not seeing Jisoo following you around." You joked.

Seungcheol smiled sheepishly. "Yeah..." He trailed off, looking down at the ground.

"Are you guys dating?" You probed with a raised eyebrow.

"I wanted to talk to you about that, actually." He admitted, making eye contact with you. Curiosity plagued you, and you stared at him expectantly as you waited for him to speak. "I wanna do something special for her when I ask her out... just cause, I don't know, I really like her." He stammered nervously, lowering his voice so no one could eavesdrop.

You gave him a genuine smile. You were happy that Jisoo had found someone that truly liked her. Ever since the beginning of the semester, she had been cycling through an array of terrible guys that used and ghosted her. Seungcheol seemed like a genuinely good person; you trusted him to take care of her.

You brought your hand to your chin as you pondered for a moment. "Well, if I'm being honest, she's, like, a huge hopeless romantic. Loves cheesy romance movies and stuff." You started, "If you took her out to a nice dinner and walked around some really pretty, romantic place after, that'd be her dream come true."

Seungcheol nodded, his eyes glazed over in deep thought as he acknowledged your advice. "Yeah, that sounds like her." He smiled. "Thanks."

You nodded. "So... how did the raffle go?"

"It went really good, actually." He responded, shoving his hands in his pockets. "The money's going to a child psychology organization. I've been doing research with them for a few months now."

Your eyes lit up in interest at his story. "That's really cool. Have you discovered any groundbreaking research yet?" You half-joked.

He chuckled, "I guess a little bit."

A lightbulb suddenly went off in your brain. "Hey, do you think I could interview you about all this research stuff you've done? I need to write an article for class."

Seungcheol shrugged. "Sure."

You spent the next few minutes probing him about how he got involved in the program, what he had been researching, his motivation to study child psychology—all while taking down notes on your phone. He explained to you how he had struggled with anxiety his whole life and wanted to find a way to help others. In the back of your mind, this was all affirming why he was such a good match for Jisoo. He was caring, passionate, charitable. Your heart warmed at the thought of Jisoo finally settling down with someone who was actually a good person.

Your interview came to an end and you thanked Seungcheol for helping you out. He nodded before glancing down at the jacket you were carrying in your arms.

"Were you planning on leaving?" He asked.

"Yeah, I need to go work on homework and stuff." You answered.

He attempted to suppress his smirk by biting his lip. "You and Mingyu didn't get much work done together?" He raised his eyebrows at you.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach. "What?"

"Relax, I'm just kidding." Seungcheol laughed. "He just seemed comfortable with you earlier, you know?"

The tension in your stomach loosened a little as you realized that he didn't actually know what happened between you two. This is exactly what Mingyu was worried about earlier. So it was true that Seungcheol liked to play matchmaker and get involved in everyone else's relationships.

"There's nothing going on between you guys?" Seungcheol questioned after you didn't respond.

You felt your cheeks grow hot with irritation. "No. I have a boyfriend." You said curtly.

Seungcheol's mouth formed an O-shape at the sudden coldness in your tone. "I-I'm sorry, I was just kidding." He quickly apologized.

"It's okay." You sighed. You glanced around for your shoes, avoiding his regretful gaze.

"Well, I really have to get going. Thanks for helping me out." You said as you slipped on your shoes.

He smiled apologetically and walked you over to the door. "See you, Y/N!" He called behind you as you stepped out into the cold.

You buried yourself in work for the next two days. You figured it was easier to just get lost in the flow of doing assignment after assignment rather than to think about what happened.

But no matter what you did, your mind still wandered back to that moment—when your lips finally met Mingyu's, and his body pressed against yours.

The worst part was that you didn't even try to stop him: you had agreed to it, and God, you even thanked him for it! You weren't even sure if you could regret what happened. You hated yourself for betraying Wonwoo's trust, but at the same time you craved attention and affection. Mingyu just happened to be the one that fulfilled your wishes after all this time.

You would never tell Mingyu that, of course. Honestly, you were unsure if you could even face him about it. He could tell that you felt guilty afterwards. If you just finished this stupid project and avoided him for the rest of the semester, he would probably get the hint and leave you alone.

It was Saturday evening when you typed the last words of your article on Seungcheol and his research. You hadn't talked to Mingyu since you left his room on Thursday night, but you needed him to complete his share of the work. Sighing, you picked up your phone and pulled up your messages with him. You quickly explained what kind of pictures he needed to take and told him to send them to you (so you could avoid seeing him anymore than you needed to).

You clicked out of your conversation, and that's when your eyes landed on the messages that were still unread by Wonwoo. You wanted to ask him what he was doing, but after three days with no response, it felt pathetic to even attempt to strike up a conversation now.

The sound of the door knob jiggling startled you before Jisoo busted into the room a moment later.

"Y/N!" She cheered in a sing-song voice. "We have another party to go to tonight!"

You already knew exactly where this party was going to be, and you felt your stomach drop at the thought of running into Mingyu.

You shook your head. "No way, Jisoo. I'm way too busy." You lied.

She pouted her lips at you. "Really? You've been working nonstop. How're you still not done?"

You shrugged and let out an exaggerated sigh.

"Well, you can take a break for a few hours. I promise I won't leave you this time. You can hangout with me and Cheol." She begged, looking at you with wide, saddened eyes.

Your phone vibrated between your hands, and when you glanced down you saw Mingyu's name on the screen.

Mingyu: I'm actually gonna be out studying and working on some stuff with a friend tonight. I promise I'll get the pics for you tomorrow :) Sent at 7:37 PM

You thought it was a little weird for a guy like Mingyu to be studying on a Saturday night, but when you realized that he wouldn't be at the party, relief flooded over you.

You looked up at Jisoo and saw her still expectantly staring at you, waiting for your response.

"I- I guess I could go for a bit."

"YES!" Seungkwan shrieked as he successfully landed another ball in one of Jisoo's cups. He turned to you and wildly smacked your palm in a high five, nearly hitting you in the face. Your stomach was starting to hurt from laughing for the past ten minutes over the intense match of beer pong in front of you.

The crowd around the table reacted loudly, some cheering and some booing as Jisoo downed another cup of alcohol. She shivered at the taste and Seungcheol came up from behind to pat her on the back. His lips moved as he said something to her, but with music blasting through the house so loud, you couldn't make out a single word.

Your phone vibrated in your back pocket. Without much thought, you pulled it out and quickly glanced at the screen.

Your heart sank into your stomach as you realized: Wonwoo was calling.

"Fuck," you muttered under your breath. You had completely forgotten that Saturday's were now reserved for your FaceTime dates.

You looked up at everyone with wide eyes, but they were too immersed in the game to notice your reaction. You pushed your way through the crowd and slipped into the bathroom before Jisoo or anyone else could come looking for you.

By the time you reached the bathroom and locked the door, the FaceTime call had already stopped ringing. Leaning against the door, you scrolled through your contacts and called back, but only as a phone call.

Wonwoo answered after two rings.

"Hey, everything alright?" He asked.

You swallowed. "Uh... yeah."

"Why didn't you FaceTime?" He continued. You hesitated, but then he spoke before you could say anything. "Why is it so loud? Where are you?"

You cursed yourself for not running away to a room that was farther away from all the music and noise outside the door. Fidgeting with your fingers, you answered: "A party."

"Oookay," he scoffed. "You could've at least let me know if you were gonna go out. But it's fine. Have fun, I guess." He responded coldly.

Your brows furrowed together instinctively. Now it was your turn to scoff at him. "You're not serious, are you?" The skin of your face grew warmer. Wonwoo was quiet. "I forgot. Sorry." You admitted through grit teeth.

"Why're you so mad?" He questioned in a defensive tone.

You rolled your eyes. "This is the first time I've ever cancelled on you and it was an accident. Do I need to remind you of all the times you ditched me?"

Wonwoo didn't respond.

"And what the fuck have you been doing the past three days that you couldn't respond to me?" You spat. Blood was rushing through your veins quickly now as anger took over.

He sighed through the receiver. "I was busy."

"Does it really take that much time to send a text to your fucking girlfriend?" Your voice began to rise. "How do you expect this to work if you don't even talk to me?"

"I'm sor-" He began to speak, but you interrupted him.

"You know, sometimes it feels like I'm dating nobody!" You cried. "Do you even realize how lonely I feel?" Your voice shook with each word as your throat grew tighter; tears welled up in your eyes. You didn't want to cry, but all the frustration you had bottled up the past couple months was finally spilling over.

In a calm voice, all Wonwoo said was: "I'm trying."

"Not hard enough." You scoffed.

"What the fuck, Y/N? Where is this coming from?" He cried. The sudden rise in his voice startled you a bit.

The phone shook in your grasp. "You act like I don't even exist! How can you call that trying?"

"Fuck, I'm not dealing with this right now. Go back to your stupid fucking party." He snapped.

"Yeah, just go and ignore me again!" You laughed sardonically.

The three tones of the call ending sounded abruptly. You looked down at your phone in shock. He had hung up on you.

Your hands balled into fists as you threw your head back against the door. Your jaw was tense, but your bottom lip still quivered.

He had done it again. It seemed it was becoming easy for him at this point—abandoning you when you needed him.

This wasn't going to last much longer if the two of you couldn't figure this out.

When you pressed your lips into a thin line, tears slipped down, staining the bags under your eyes with makeup.

Was he giving up on you?

Your head began to pound. You couldn't stand being in this hot bathroom any longer, much less this party in general. You wiped your cheeks with the back of your hand and turned to unlock the door.

As you took a step out of the bathroom, you kept your gaze locked on your feet; you didn't want anyone to notice the state you were currently in.

Not even a moment after opening the door, you collided with a tall, warm body.

"Sorry," you mumbled, pushing past.

"Y/N?" A familiar voice called. Strong hands grasped your forearm, and you glanced up at the figure.

Mingyu.

What force was bringing you back to him once again?

His lips parted in a small gasp as he noticed the redness in your tearful eyes. "Hey, what's wrong? Come here."

Before you could protest, he guided you back into the bathroom, closing and locking the door so no one could bother you two.

You kept your eyes down at the ground, unable to look at him. As he approached you, the heat of his skin radiated against you.

"I thought you were out studying." You spoke, breaking the silence.

Mingyu's hands found your jaw. He ran the smooth skin of his thumbs over your cheeks, wiping the tears that remained. "I finished early," he explained.

"Look at me," Mingyu whispered. You swallowed and blinked before meeting his eyes.

You didn't notice the thin, black-rimmed glasses that were resting on his nose before. His dark hair was pushed back, and his tan skin glowed under the bathroom light. You hated how instinctively drawn you felt to his presence.

You started to think that Kim Mingyu might be the Devil, disguised in the form of a beautiful boy that always knew the right words to say. He was here to tempt you, to swindle you at your most vulnerable moments, to test your fidelity. And you were weak enough to cave in.

"Is it your boyfriend?" He asked.

The gaze he held on you was so intense that you found yourself staring at the frames of his glasses instead of his eyes. You nodded silently in response to his question.

"Talk to me. What happened?" Mingyu cooed as he stroked your cheeks with his thumbs.

"I-" You started, but let out a sigh instead. "We just fought. I don't know. I don't wanna talk about it." You rambled.

"Okay," he nodded. "Sorry if I pushed it." He removed his hands from your face. The skin suddenly felt cold without his touch.

He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "We can talk about something else."

You stood still, nodding, but couldn't think of anything to say.

"You know," Mingyu started, "You look really pretty. Even when you're crying." Your skin flushed at the compliment.

Rolling your eyes playfully, you wiped the last remnants of makeup off your cheeks. "Is that your go-to line for every girl?" You joked.

"No," he replied. "Just cause I'm in a frat doesn't mean I'm a douche."

You snickered under your breath. "Yeah, but there's gotta be so many girls that hit on you."

"There's some," he shrugged. "Doesn't mean I flirt back."

Your legs were beginning to grow tired from standing, so you walked over to the counter and sat on the edge. You gripped the ledge to keep your balance, swinging your legs back and forth.

Mingyu stood in his same spot, but turned in your direction. He quirked his eyebrows at you. "Are you suggesting that I'm attractive enough to have hundreds of girls swooning over me?" He shot you a teasing grin.

You chuckled and shook your head. "You wish."

Mingyu's jaw dropped in a fake expression of shock as he came closer to you, but he stood to the side to stare at himself in the mirror. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"Since when do you wear glasses?" You inquired.

"Since forever." He replied.

Mingyu placed his hands on the edge of the counter, pushing his weight onto them. The muscles in his arms were prominent through his black shirt. Your eyes dragged across his figure, eventually landing on his face again.

"I like them. They look good." You said.

He glanced at you, his eyes laced with hints of suspicion. "Thanks," he said with his voice a little uneven. He cleared his throat and stood up straight. "Did I help get your mind off him a bit?"

You winced at the mention of Wonwoo, but nodded. "Yeah, you did. Thank you." You exhaled.

Mingyu smiled to himself and his eyes met yours once again. "Good. I feel like it's the least I can do to help."

As you stared at him, you admired his features—his soft, clear complexion and plump lips. You suddenly became aware of how close he was to you; his hand was resting only a few inches away from your thigh. Your mind thought back to how it felt when those hands caressed the bare skin of your body. Impulsively, your thighs pressed together at the revisitation of the memory.

The room felt like it had instantly shot up ten degrees, and the heat left your judgement clouded like a foggy mirror. If Mingyu really was the Devil, his plan was working.

You leaned towards him until your face was only a few inches from his. Your breath caught in your throat as you went to speak.

"I really wanna kiss you right now." You admitted quickly, your eyes focused on his lips.

Mingyu backed away. "Are you drunk?" He asked. His eyes were wide with concern as he scanned you.

You remained where you were, embarrassment creeping up on you as you rapidly shook your head. "I haven't drank anything."

Mingyu chewed on his bottom lip. "I- I don't think it's a good idea. After last time..." he trailed off, glancing up to peek at your reaction. "I don't want you to do something you'll regret again."

"I don't regret it." You blurted before you could stop yourself.

You weren't sure what you were doing or where you wanted to go with this, but you couldn't stop. A feeling of lust had possessed you at this point, controlling your every word and action.

Mingyu looked taken aback at your confession, standing up straighter. His lips were parted in uncertainty, but you watched as his eyes flicked down to look at your lips.

"You don't?" He asked, inching closer to you.

Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest now. You quickly shook your head. "No."

His right hand found a place to rest under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him as his face neared yours. He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip.

"Are you sure?" He whispered.

Desire had overcome you so strongly at this point that you couldn't bring yourself to answer him through words. Instead, you crashed your lips onto his.

Mingyu responded eagerly, his kisses fueled with the same amount of force. Your hands quickly found purchase on the nape of his neck, pulling his body closer to yours. Right as you spread your legs to allow him to stand in between them, Mingyu's tongue darted against your lips, slipping into your mouth when you parted your lips for him.

He placed his left hand on your inner thigh, roughly squeezing the flesh between his fingers as he deepened the kiss. You moaned into his mouth, and he dragged his other hand down to the small of your back to pull you closer to him.

Now your core was pressed against his. Mingyu removed his lips from yours, only to place open-mouthed kisses on the area below your ear. You jerked your hips up as he nibbled lightly on the skin, the friction between your thighs growing.

Your jaw hung open as your arousal increased with each moment; your breathing became heavy while you panted into his ear. He sucked on your collarbone, and a chill shot it's way up your spine. You whimpered loudly and you could feel Mingyu smirk against your skin.

"You sound so pretty," he mumbled, his lips brushing against your skin as he spoke. He lifted his head, his tongue poking out of his cheek while he observed you. Your head was thrown back, eyes half shut, and you were ever so slightly grinding your hips against his for the smallest bit of relief.

Mingyu brought his fingers up to your lips, tapping on the soft skin to catch your attention. "Suck," he said, watching as you obediently parted your lips for him. He shoved two of his fingers into your mouth and pressed them down against your tongue. You could feel wetness building up between your legs. Even though it wasn't anything extreme, Wonwoo never did stuff like this with you in bed. You had to admit, all the new things that Mingyu was introducing to you excited you.

You hummed against him as he stuffed your mouth, almost gagging when his fingers neared the back of your throat. You swirled your tongue around his digits before he quickly pulled them away. You opened your eyes, staring at him in confusion, but his hungry gaze was already locked in on your core. He fumbled with the button of your jeans, and you felt your arousal suddenly spike at the thought of his fingers inside you.

You helped him shuffle your jeans over your ass and down to your knees. He bit his lip as he stared at your clothed heat, his cock stiffening beneath his own jeans, and pressed his dampened fingers to your clit through the fabric of your underwear.

You gasped quietly at the contact, but it wasn't enough. "Mmh, Mingyu," you whined. "Please."

"So needy," he teased with a smirk on his lips. He slipped his fingers beneath the fabric, pressing into your slick folds. His breathing grew heavier. "How're you so wet? I barely even touched you." He breathed against your cheek before he pressed a soft kiss to it. You blushed at his teasing words.

Mingyu rubbed your clit in slow circles, spreading your arousal around your folds. He pressed his lips to yours again, swallowing the moans you were letting out. He dragged his fingers down your heat, teasing your entrance by avoiding it. You clenched around nothing.

"Mingyu, I need you," you muttered against his lips.

"My fingers?" He questioned teasingly, pushing the tips of his digits into your core.

Desire was eating away at you, clouding your thoughts and replacing them with lust-filled ones. You bucked your hips up into his hand, whimpering beneath him.

"No, I want... you." You panted, looking up at him. Embarrassment picked away at you due to your vague request. His eyes appeared even darker than usual as he stared down at you with lust, registering what you were asking for.

Just as he was about to speak, the door knob shook, followed by loud pounding on the door. You jumped, and Mingyu quickly pulled his fingers away from your heat, leaving you with nothing.

"Open up!" A voice called from outside the door. "I have to piss!"

Oh, how wonderful.

You looked to Mingyu with wide eyes, and he motioned for you to stand up. "Pull your pants up!" He shouted at you in a whisper as he wiped his hands on his jeans. He stepped away from the counter, pressing his lips together in frustration as he realized the tent in his pants was painfully obvious.

You pushed yourself off the counter, standing up with shaky legs as you quickly pulled your pants over your hips and re-buttoned them.

The door knob jiggled again. "I'm literally gonna piss myself if you don't open this door in five seconds!" The same voice cried.

"What do we do?" You whispered to Mingyu.

He sighed. "Get out of here as fast as possible and go to my room." Your stomach flipped at the mention of his bedroom; you were really about to go through with this. He reached his hand out for you to grab, and you took hold of it as he led you both to the door.

Mingyu fumbled with the lock, and the door busted open a moment later, revealing a very drunken boy on the other side. He looked both of you up and down. You ducked down slightly, attempting to hide your face behind Mingyu's broad shoulders.

"Fuck, Mingyu? Really? The bathroom?" The boy said with disgust.

Mingyu rolled his eyes, his hand squeezing yours tighter. "Fuck off, Soonyoung." He replied before rushing out of the bathroom with you following close behind.

You couldn't help giggling at Mingyu's comment. He glanced over his shoulder when he noticed you laughing, a smile finding its way to his own lips as he chuckled at you. "Was I too harsh?" He joked.

Mingyu dragged you through the house quickly, and when you reached the bottom of the stairs, he pushed you in front of him to lead the way. You rushed up the steps, and when you neared the top, a sudden smack was delivered to your butt.

You let out a cry, followed by laughter of disbelief. "Mingyu!" You exclaimed with your jaw dropped once you reached the top of the stairs.

Mingyu stood behind you, his hands gripping your waist. He giggled into your ear. "I'm sorry, your ass is so cute." He placed a soft peck to your cheek.

"Let's go," he whispered, his voice suddenly an octave lower. Your stomach twisted, and Mingyu began leading you towards his room with his hands still on your hips.

He let go of you to twist the knob and push the door open, but as soon as you stepped foot into his room, his hands found your waist again and hurriedly pushed you further past the door. He kicked the door closed behind him, pushing you up against the wood. His lips quickly found yours, kissing you with even more intensity than before.

You could barely catch your breath as Mingyu gave you more rough kisses. He was being taken over by lust; he pressed himself against you, allowing you to feel the hardness in his pants. You ran one hand from his shoulder down his chest and stomach, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt tensing at your touch. Finally you palmed him through his jeans and he groaned against your mouth.

"Fuck, you're driving me crazy." He whispered before placing one more messy kiss to your lips. He pulled away to slip his fingers under the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head quickly and tossing it to the floor. His lips found your neck again, and you moaned as his tongue darted out to lick your sensitive spot. His hands were on your ass, pulling you closer to him and squeezing the soft skin.

Your head rolled back. "Shit, Mingyu," you moaned. "I need you now."

Mingyu pulled away to look down at you with a grin on his face. "Yeah?" He raised his eyebrow. He spanked your ass lightly, causing you to whimper and lean into him. "Go to the bed." He demanded, stepping away from you.

You walked to the bed, trying to swing your hips to hide the nervous wobble in your knees. You felt Mingyu come up behind you, his body pressing against yours. His stiff cock was brushing against your thigh. You turned around, sitting on the edge of the bed as you looked up at him.

"When are you gonna take this off?" You questioned while toying with the fabric of his shirt.

He chewed on his lip as he smirked at you. Without a word, he pulled it over his head, exposing his muscular arms and toned chest. Your eyes dragged hungrily over his torso, drinking in the sight of the outline of his abs.

"Better?" He teased, interrupting your admiring of his body. You looked up at his face. His glasses still rested on his nose, but his hair was slightly disheveled and his lips were now pink and swollen from kissing yours. You were breathless. He was beautiful, and you wanted him so badly.

You perked up from the position you were sitting in, a surge of confidence driven by desire guiding you. "Lie down," you commanded. Mingyu looked taken aback for a moment as he processed your sudden dominance, but he just chuckled and laid down without protest.

Once his back was against the mattress and he was splayed out beneath you, you crawled up towards him, straddling his hips. You dragged your hands down his chest, admiring the softness and warmth of his skin while you began to grind against him.

Mingyu threw his head back as he moaned softly, and you felt yourself clench at the sound. You leaned down, pressing your chest to his as you left kisses on his neck. His hips bucked up into your center. The friction between your bodies was so intense it was driving you insane.

You felt his fingers drag across your spine, causing goosebumps to from across your skin. He fumbled with the clasp of your bra and pulled the straps down your arms. You sat up to fully pull it off and throw it somewhere in the room, and Mingyu quickly brought his hands to your breasts. He squeezed the sensitive buds, twisting your nipples between his fingers. You moaned and pressed your hips into his even harder.

"Ride me," Mingyu mumbled into your ear. Unable to form any words, you nodded, reaching for the button of his jeans.

You lifted yourself off him to help him unzip his pants, and once he started pulling them off you kneeled to the side to discard your own jeans. Just as you began pulling your underwear down your thighs, Mingyu reached for the nightstand next to his bed, shuffling around in the drawer and eventually pulling out a condom.

He pulled his cock out of his boxers, and it stood stiffly against his stomach. He quickly ripped open the package, sliding the latex over his shaft. You straddled his thighs again, about to sink yourself onto him when he quickly grabbed your hips.

"No, no." He said. "Turn around."

You looked at him in confusion. "But-"

"Just trust me," he added, pressing a soft kiss to your chest.

You turned around so your back was facing him, still straddling his thighs. He kept one hand on your waist as the other reached for his cock. He guided the stiff head through your folds, wetting his cock with your arousal. When the tip brushed against your clit you whimpered as you clenched around nothing again.

"Please, Mingyu," you whined.

He dragged the head down to your entrance, finally pushing into you. Both of his hands rested on your hips now as he slowly sunk you down onto him.

You moaned at the slight burning sensation the stretch left behind. It had already been months since a dick was last inside you, and with Mingyu's size it was even more intense.

You aided by lowering yourself onto his cock, and once he bottomed out inside you he stayed still to let you adjust. His dick twitched inside you, and you clenched around him in response.

"You're so fucking tight," he moaned into your ear. He began nibbling and sucking at the skin between your neck and shoulder from behind you, and you whined in response.

You lifted yourself off him slowly, basking in the feeling of his cock rubbing against your walls. You sunk down fully onto him before raising your hips again, finally beginning to ride him.

Mingyu allowed you to work yourself against his length while he brought one hand to your breast again. You moaned loudly as he squeezed the flesh between his fingers and bucked his hips up into you.

"Mmmh, shit, you feel so good," you babbled before crying loudly again. Mingyu quickly brought his other hand up to your throat, lightly choking you.

"Shhh, baby." He whispered against your skin. "You can't be so loud." His words were followed by another soft slap to your ass, making you whine quietly.

He let go of your throat, bringing both of his hands to your waist once again to speed up your pace. He angled his hips so he could thrust up into you at the same time, and the angle caused him to hit your sensitive spot every time. You panted loudly as the pressure in your lower stomach grew, and you ground yourself against his cock, clenching around him.

"Shit." Mingyu choked out breathlessly. "Tight little pussy's taking me so well."

Maybe it was the filthy words that left his mouth, or the way Mingyu took hold of your hips to slow your pace and thrust into you especially hard, but you felt yourself tip over the edge, your mind cloudy as pleasure overtook you. You couldn't even tell if you were crying out loudly, but you assumed so by the way Mingyu suddenly pulled himself out of you and pushed you forward until your face was pressed into the mattress and he was kneeled behind you.

He thrusted into you roughly now, trying to reach his own high. Your eyes were rolling back into your head as your core tingled with oversensitivity, and you could feel yourself drooling onto the sheets.

He came with a particularly rough grunt, pausing his movements as his cum emptied into the condom inside you. He moaned breathlessly and he slowly pumped himself in and out of you to milk his orgasm. Finally, he pulled himself completely out, and his hand ran across your spine.

"You okay?" He asked, and you lifted yourself onto your hands and knees, nodding. Mingyu looked down at your legs, his lips dropping in a slight gasp. "Your thighs are shaking." He noted out loud.

Your face burnt with embarrassment as you kneeled back onto your knees. When you finally turned to look at Mingyu, he was tossing the condom into the trash. His hair was now pressed to his forehead with sweat and his cheeks were tinted a shade of pink. When his eyes met yours, his lips quirked up into a smile.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to get rough with you." He apologized. He sheepishly scratched the back of his neck.

You shook your head. "N-no, it's okay," you croaked out, finally able to formulate words now that all the post-orgasm bliss was fading away.

You didn't know why, but you felt like you had to be near him. You crawled up towards him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. It felt natural. Comfortable. It reminded you of how you felt with Wonwoo. And despite how much you enjoyed feeling Mingyu's soft lips against yours, that thought terrified you.

"Do you regret this?" He mumbled against your lips.

It scared you—the way you were able to betray Wonwoo so easily. Here you were, in bed with another boy: one that you shared inside jokes with and stole kisses from and ran to for comfort. All that you had built with Wonwoo over the past two years—were some miles apart really enough to tear everything down?

You answered honestly.

"No."

[jjmaybanksbaby]

Where It Leads (Rafe Cameron)

Summer I

Part 02: That James Deam Daydream

series masterlist | previous part

summary: After the car accident, you haven’t been able to get Rafe out of your mind but hasn’t he already caused enough trouble?

a/n: With the semester ending I have a lot more free time so I plan on updating this series more consistently (ie weekly)!! I’m also gonna start a taglist for this series so if you want to be added to it drop a ☀️ in my inbox/messages!

word count: 1.5k

The fluorescent lights of the hospital flooded your vision as you blinked your groggy eyes open. The machines you were connected to beeped slow and hypnotically beside you. You could feel the pain that would ripple through your body with every movement before had even attempted to sit up. Your breathing was labored and forced, an unusual sensation.

Your mom entered the room carrying two cups of steaming coffee which she placed on the small table in the corner of the room as soon as she noticed you were awake. She sat down quickly in the chair that was situated on the left side of your hospital bed. She automatically took your hand in hers.

"Oh, good, honey. You're awake. How are you feeling?" She asked, her brow knit together in concern. The bags under her eyes seemed to give you some indication of how long you'd been out. Your mother was always the most put together in the room. Her dirty blonde hair, the same color as yours, always gave the allusion of having been freshly blown out. Her makeup never looked chalky or stale, a skill you'd never quite been able to replicate. She lived in black blazers and stilettos, her purse resting in the nook of her arm.

The person holding tightly onto your hand in that hospital room was an entirely different version of your mom. One that two days ago had gotten a call that her daughter had gotten into a car crash, thrown a bunch of clothes in a suitcase, and board the first available flight from Oregon to the Outer Banks.

Your eyelids drooped, it was taking all your energy to keep them open so you let them close.

"Mom," you said, your voice coming out just barely above a whisper. "What happened?" You asked, even though you remembered most of what had happened the night of the crash.

The way you'd scrapped your knee climbing out of your window of your Nonna's house. The beautiful Cameron boy. The bonfire and the stink eye Phoebe had given you all night. The headlights of the car bellowing down the wrong side of the road. Rafe's hand grabbings yours.

Your mom reached up and brushed away a strand of hair that had fallen onto your face. "You were in a car crash y/n. The other car hit the side of the one you were in and pushed you into a ditch. The force of the airbag fractured your rib which punctured your lung. The doctors said you're gonna be okay but they're keeping you on an IV drip of some pain meds."

Your chest did feel heavy but not just from the injuries.

"Wh- what about Rafe? Is he okay?" You forced yourself to open your eyes.

Your mom breathed in sharply. "He's okay. He left the hospital yesterday with his dad with only a concussion and a broken wrist."

"Mmmhmm." You mumbled in acknowledgment. You could feel sleep taking over once again. "I love you." You said to your mom before drifting off.

☼☼☼

Your bed was littered with the clothes you should have been packing because your flight left early tomorrow morning but instead, you were laying on the floor staring up at the ceiling, the fan whirling around rapidly. The August heat had seeped into the house, causing you to break into a sweat with the smallest movement. The sounds of the conversation between your Nonna and mom echoed from downstairs. You were sure they were probably arguing about you, again.

Your mom hadn't been able to let the accident go even though. You tried to explain to her how you'd left the house without your Nonna's permission so it wasn't like it was totally her fault. You sighed, wincing at the pain that still ran through your body when you took too deep a breath.

A tiny ping filled your ears causing you to sit up.

Ping. There it was again.

A third peddle hit your window. You walked over to it, sliding it open to see Rafe standing on the lawn below.

Your breath hitched. You hadn't seen him since that night but he looked exactly the same except for the black splint on his wrist.

"Hi," he yelled, cupping his hands around his mouth so his voice carried.

You glanced over your shoulder nervous that your mom or Nonna were going to walk into the room at any moment having heard Rafe's shouting.

"Come up here," you replied, waving him up to your room.

With a surprising amount of speed for someone with only one good wrist, he pulled himself up the side of the porch and climbed through your window.

His eyes meet yours as he landed on the carpet and words escaped you entirely. The sparks that had been there that night hadn't disappeared at all.

"Hey, stranger," Rafe said, failing to hold back a smirk.

"Nice cast," you replied.

He looked down at it and quickly back up at you. "I'm sorry about everything. I promised to get you home safe and then got us into a car crash. Not exactly how I pictured the night ending." He forced a laugh but the regret in his voice was unmissable.

You took a step closer to him. "You don't have to apologize Rafe. You did everything you could. And I'm okay. You're okay. We're alive." There was more you wanted to say but the words seemed to disappear before you could form them.

Rafe closed the distance between the two of you stopping right in front of you. "God, I like you so much and I really fucked it up. Didn't I?"

This time a genuine laugh escaped you. "I think we might be able to salvage it." You responded feeling unusually bold. You grabbed his face, pulling him down to your level and placed an urgent kiss on his lips.

He slipped his own hand behind your neck, keeping your mouth pressed against his. The air around you was electric and neither of you dared to pull away first.

The door to your bedroom swung open and your Nonna's loud stern voice suddenly took over.

"Y/n y/l/n."

You stepped away from Rafe quickly, dropping your arms to your side. You turned around to face your Nonna. Her face was set with anger.

"Out Mr. Cameron." She instructed.

"Right. I was just leaving." He replied, moving back towards the window.

"Out the front door." Your Nonna clarified.

"Oh, yeah. Of course. My bad." Rafe said. His eyes connected with yours for just a moment as he walked out of the room. Your head the front door close behind him a few beats later.

You stayed frozen in the middle of the room, awaiting the lecture you knew was coming next.

Your Nonna crossed the room and shut the window.

"You're letting all the a/c out." She said, dryly.

"I'm sorry," you responded, apologizing for more than leaving the window open.

"A Cameron boy almost ruined your mother's life. I won't let the same thing happen to you." Your Nonna pushed some of your clothes aside and sat down on the bed.

"Your mom," she started again. "She started dating Rafe's dad, Ward, during her junior year. He was a year older and going to UNC in the fall. She wanted to follow him after she graduated high school. She thought she loved him and I told her no. Told her she could pick anywhere else but I wouldn't pay for her to throw her life away for puppy love. They broke up in October of her senior year. She barely spoke more than a few words to me for months. Then she moved away to California for college and didn't call me her entire freshman year. It was the hardest thing I've had to do as a mother. It almost ruined me. Ruined our relationship. But he was never going to really make her happy. He didn't love her like she loved him and it would never have lasted and then she'd be stuck at a school that she hadn't chosen for herself." Your Nonna looked up at you as she finished speaking.

"Do you understand what I'm saying?" She asked. "That Cameron boy isn't good for you." Your Nonna stood up and walked over to you. She placed a kiss on your forehead. "I love you, muffin."

"I love you too." You replied. "I gotta finish packing."

"Okay," she said, closing the door behind her as she walked out of your room.

You flopped backward onto your bed and let out an audible groan. You had finally kissed Rafe Cameron and of course, your Nonna had to walk in at that moment.

Your phone, which had been previously discarded in the mess on your bed, buzzed. You pulled it out from under a pile of swimsuits. A text from Rafe popped up on the screen.

r: 'I'm officially scared of your grandma.'

y/n: 'hahah did you know our parents dated in hs?'

r: 'Really? I didn't. Weird.'

r: 'When do you leave?'

y/n: 'tomorrow moring'

The three dots showing that Rafe was typing appeared the screen up again and then went away. You waited another moment before turning your phone off and tossing it to the side.

You knew your Nonna just wanted the best for you but it wasn't gonna be easy to get Rafe Cameron out of your head.

[dreamingofmilk]

Poetic Justice

This was a joy to write. Shout out to @chaneajoyyy and @shaekingshitup for doing this challenge.

Synopsis: You meet Erik at an open mic night and it changes everything

Warnings: cursing

Word Count: 2597

Coming to open mic night at your favorite cafe was worth it. You only just found out about the elusive and secretive gathering of college individuals. But you made it your goal to go at least once a week. Sometimes it was hard, school work piles up quickly when you are having fun. 

But tonight, you had to get out no matter how many essays and online homework you needed to complete. And you regretted nothing once he took the stage. Tall dark and handsome, Erik Stevens, the poet had you entranced. His poetic stories about black struggle and black love pushed you further down the rabbit hole than you could ever imagine. 

This man seemed to be everything you could ever imagine. And you were so happy to have a seat up close and to the far right of the stage where you could fangirl in peace. 

You’d seen this beauty around campus a few times, but never once did you imagine that he had such a way with words and his voice was that smooth. And the way he strummed the guitar… You only hoped he could strum your clit that delicately. 

You watched his set intensely, his every move an imprint in your mind. You wanted to record it to play it back later, but you knew that would be wildly inappropriate. Snaps filled the room as he finished up and he smiled and bowed his head in acknowledgment. The man knew he was fine. 

Erik Stevens stepped off the stage and packed away his guitar as another talented student took the stage to share her beautiful voice. You watched his broad back shuffle around until he went behind the curtains and came around. The exit for the stage right in front of your high table. 

Erik’s eyes watched you closely, you bit your lips gently when his eyes raked over your body with lust. Damn. How can Just one look from this man have you ready to risk it all? You smiled shyly at Erik when you made eye contact again. Erik sent you a wink and a smile so genuine it made your thighs clench. He then quietly made his way through the crowd to join his friends. 

You smiled softly to yourself then settled in to enjoy the rest of the night with your friend. 

————-

Early morning classes were not your thing. But when one of your major classes is only offered at 8 am on Tuesday’s, you had no choice. Hence why you were in the juice line in your increasingly crowded dining hall. You desperately wanted some freshly juice fruits and were willing to wait in a long line to get it. That or you were looking for any excuse to be late for class. 

“Excuse me. Do you know what juices they have today?” A deep voice from behind you asked. 

“No but it looks so good. Soo… goood…” your voice trailed off when you turned around to talk to the stranger. Erik again. You smiled a polite smile and turned back forward, your heart racing in your chest. Fuck. He was even more attractive up close and in the light. And he smelled so good too. 

Erik smiled and held out his hand for you to shake. You gently put your hand in his. 

“I’m Erik.” His voice washed over you. “You were at the show the other night. You look good in blue.” He complimented your dress from the other night. 

“Thanks.” You told him your name. “You’re a great artist.” You were up in line to order your juice. 

“Thank you babygirl.” His eyes dropped to your lips before flitting back up to meet your eyes. 

“You sitting down to eat? Maybe I could join you?” His voice was hopeful as you stepped up to order. 

Your heart sunk. “Erik I really wish I could but I have to get to class, I'm already late enough waiting for this drink. Next time though. I promise.” Instinctually you held out your pinky finger for him to seal in the promise. You blushed and went to remove yourself. 

“Wait. A promise is a promise and has to be sealed in some way.” He wraps his pinky finger around yours and brings both your hands up so that you can both kiss your fist. The two of you break away, eyes intense and your heart beating out of your chest. 

“Next time.” You smile and step back over to the juice counter. 

He smiles as you leaned forward to accept your drink. “Have a good day.” His eyes watched you as you walked past him to the exit of the dining hall, a smirk on his lips as his eyes fell to your ass. 

————

Laundry day was one of your faves on campus. Usually you did it so late at night that you had the laundry room to yourself so you would sit on one of the machines, playing games on your phone. 

You’d just beaten a really difficult level and you were up out of your seat cheering in circles for yourself. 

“Damn, if I knew this is the type of introduction I would get, I would ask you to announce at poetry nights.” Erik smiled at you. You turned around quickly, a heat creeping up your body as you saw him leaning against one of the machines. A smirk sat on his full lips and his arms crossed tightly on his chest. 

“Don’t stop now, the only thing I would change is you screaming my name.” Erik’s smirk grew bigger as your ears burned. 

“Shut up.” You smiled bashfully and climbed back on top of the washing machine. Erik approached slowly coming to stand in front of your legs. 

“What’s got you so excited anyway?” Erik took your phone from his hand and started dying of laughter. 

“Candy Crush!” He laughed loudly, you smiled in a daze watching his beautiful smile. “Well I guess I should take it as a win.” He handed you back your phone. “At least it’s not no guy in your phone making you smile like that. I wanna make you smile like that.” Erik stared up at you. 

You looked away, he just didn’t know what he was doing to you. Or he did and he was determined to make you become a massive puddle. Well he succeeded at least halfway, there’s a massive puddle in your shorts right now. 

“Tell me… what do I have to do to make you smile like that?” Erik’s soft hand found its way on the top of your knee. Very gently, his eyes asking for permission. 

You shrugged and nodded at the same time. Erik laughed. “What does that mean?” 

It means that you can eat me out on this washing machine! You screamed in your head. 

“It means that I don’t know what you have to do.” Erik stepped closer bracing his hands on either side of you. 

“You know, I’ve seen you around a lot before. You’re so pretty that I can always pick you out of a crowd. But I never had the courage to speak to you. That is until I saw you at my set.” Erik spoke softly, a small smile found its way onto your lips. 

“There we go. Got something. So I just gotta compliment your fine ass and your face will shine brighter than the sun.”

“Erik if you don’t take your poetic ass somewhere. Don’t you have clothes to wash?” You say smartly. 

“Nah. I just saw you in here and I had to come speak. You see now that we are friends you ain’t never getting rid of me.” Erik gently rubbed the outside of your thigh. “Besides, you owe me company for a meal.”

You rolled your eyes remembering your pinky promise in the dining hall. 

“After your clothes are finished you are coming with me for a midnight meal.” Erik’s eyes twinkled once you agreed and you wondered what his idea of a midnight meal was. 

________

You sighed and rubbed your face. Fuck this paper! You figured if you went to the library really early you'd be able to focus and get it done, but you were struggling. Coffee wouldn't even help. You'd been at it for 4 hours and barely had 2 pages finished. It was time to cut your losses and try again later. You were putting your last book in your bag when you heard that all too familiar voice.

"What are you doing here so early Y/N?" Erik looked down at you, a smirk on his face. 

Why did you always run into this man? Ever since the open mic night it seemed like you saw him all the time. 

You frowned, "I was trying to get a ten page paper done, but I can't focus."

He scoffed, "You took Mandrake didn't you? That's where you fucked up. Everyone knows she assigns a big paper at the beginning of the semester."

You couldn't help the pout that formed on your lips, "I didn't know!"

"Let me help you. I have some work I need to finish too. Maybe we can help each other focus and get out of here sooner." He smiled sympathetically. 

He sat down across from you and pulled out his materials. He also pulled out a pair of gold rimmed glasses that made him look sexy as fuck. Who the hell makes glasses look that good? 

You couldn't help but be nosy and when he pulled out a book with Freud's name on it. You had to ask.

"Are you a psych major?"

Erik followed your eyes to the book and smiled. "I'm a double major. Psychology and African American Studies."

You whistled "Oh so he's woke and smart."

"I want to be a psychologist for at risk black kids. I went through a lot of shit when I was a kid and it fucked me up for years. I want to prevent that from happening to anyone else." Erik shrugged. 

"That's amazing, Erik." And you meant it. What a great way to make an impact on the community. You already really liked Erik, but this took the cake. He really was a great guy.

He shrugged, his embarrassment clear. "I wish there was someone that could have helped me back then. It would have saved me from making a lot of dumb decisions."

You grabbed his hands, "Seriously Erik. That's really cool. You should be proud of it. You're going to do great things."

Erik's thumb rubbed over your hand and he smiled softly before raising your hand to kiss it. "Thank you, babygirl. I really appreciate that."

You felt like your heart was going to beat right out of your chest. You've never felt chemistry like this with a guy, and you had a feeling you never would again. Erik was someone special.

Erik smirked at you. "Now stop ogling me and get moving on that paper."

Your ears burned as you focused on your laptop, his laugh wrapping around you like a warm blanket. 

You did peep him sneaking glances at you while you both worked though, so you considered it a win regardless.

________

You rushed out of class. The professor held everyone an extra 10 minutes, and you were running late for your next class. Once you got closer to the quad you noticed there was a crowd. You didn't really care what was going on, you didn't have time to see what had everyone so fascinated. You had just got to where the crowd was but you heard the most beautiful music and you couldn't help but move closer to see where it was coming from. 

And to your surprise standing there, looking more gorgeous than anyone had the right to, was Erik Stevens. The sun lit his profile perfectly, his brown skin glowing in the light. His fingers glided across the guitar, the music lulling you into a state of peace you've never experienced. You couldn't look away from him. He was so captivating. Before you realized it you moved across the quad and stood in the front of the crowd, but off to the side. Erik closed his eyes and his body began swaying to the music. The notes sounded very familiar, but you couldn't put your finger on where you recognized it from. After a few seconds of strumming Erik opened his mouth and started singing India Arie 'Ready for Love'.

You were absolutely sure your jaw was on the ground. You had no idea he could sing! His voice was beautiful, smooth and rich, like the most expensive Hennessy. He glided through the notes effortlessly, adding a few of his own runs and techniques to make it his own. You believed every word he was saying, his voice was so honest. He really sounded like he was in love with someone and it just made his performance that much better.

Someone next to you walked closer to him and dropped a few bills in his guitar case. As they walked back to their spot Erik opened his eyes, instinctually following them. When his eyes met yours you felt your heart rate pick up and your breath catch in your throat. Erik looked right into your eyes and kept singing, a slight smile on his lips. This man was LETHAL. It felt like he was serenading you. You couldn't help but smile back, you were pretty sure there were actual hearts in your eyes. 

I am ready for Y/N

The two of you couldn't look away from each other. You could actually feel a force pulling you to him. The crowd erupted in shocked chatter when he slipped up and sang your name. Erik just smiled and kept going, but you could hardly breathe. You've never heard your name sound so beautiful before. You had a big dopey smile on your face but you couldn't get rid of it if you wanted to.

He strummed the guitar, the notes tapering into silence. As soon as he finished the crowd erupted into loud cheers and applause. As everyone dispersed you made your way over to him. 

"That was amazing Erik. I had no idea you could sing."

He smiled softly, "Yeah, it's not something I do often."

"It was beautiful. You really should sing more often." It'd be a shame for him to hide his talent. 

He smirked. "Sing more in general or sing to you more?"

You looked away in embarrassment, your ears burning. "Why did you say my name?"

"It was an accident. When I saw you I got nervous and made a freudian slip I guess." He rubbed the back of his neck, his smile sheepish.

You pouted, "So you didn't mean it?" 

He smirked, "Of course I meant it. I did say a Freudian slip. You were on my mind so I said your name."

You rolled your eyes, but your tone was teasing. "There's my psychology nerd. I was starting to get worried."

He chuckled and moved in closer, until his chest brushed up against you. He reached out a hand and fixed a piece of your hair before cupping your face. "Be my girl and there's a lot more where that came from."

You smiled, looking into his eyes. "Yes."

His smile was bright. Erik grabbed the back of your neck and kissed you. You may have made a Freudian slip of your own when he sucked your soul out of your mouth.

Taglist: @aislinnsilver @wawakanda-btch @chaneajoyyy @marvelmaree

[fluffydragon22]

2.25 : The Dying Orchid

It was a sunny late July and early August. The sun was shining brightly without any visible clouds covering its lights. It was probably the third week without any contact with Lily. She blocked me two days after that disastrous day and had never opened it even until August came by to say hi. The observer didn't visit me anymore.

I went through my days mostly in my room. My family was kind enough to let me stay that way, without ever bothering me except when my sister said the food was ready. It was safe to say that i didn't enjoy my life throughout those three weeks. I remember that i spent an hour or two, everyday, just staring outside, daydreaming with an empty mind.

I stopped writing, i stopped making comics, i stopped playing games with my friends, i basically cut off any interaction with another human being. Anti social kind of behaviour. But i did need time to figure everything out. For me, it was not as simple as thinking about question and answer, or as simple as asking advice from people. It took me like forever to be at peace with how alone i was. But before i could reach it, the observer and Lily came back into my life.

"Hello there Adrian." The observer said to me on a sunny afternoon, 5th August 2020.

"Hi there, observer. It's been a while." I answered.

"Yes indeed it is. I hope you're happy to see me again." He said and took a seat.

"Oh of course i am." I said and gave him a bit of smile.

"She would come back?" I asked him after we found a bit of silence.

"Perhaps. Have you learned your lesson?" He asked me.

"Yeah, but i still believe that things will change. Third time's a charm." I answered calmly.

"I admire your optimism." The observer laughed.

"I hope you'll visit me more often. Life gets a bit lonely sometimes without talking to other people." I told him as i threw myself on the bed.

"But i'm not a person." He said, trying to avoid what i wanted.

"Maybe, but on the outside, you're a person so that counts." I told him.

"Well, yeah that's correct. I suppose." He said.

"I know it's a hard time for you, perhaps one of the hard time you ever face. But you should be able to stand up for yourself. Stop expecting others to acknowledge your existence." He added and paused.

"I think i lost a bit of my will to live." I said after inhaling deeply.

"I know she wouldn't affect you in a good way." He broke another silence.

"Well, you're already 20 years old, i'm sure you can decide what's the best for you. Still, you can't find another like that one person. Your thoughts whenever you are in the lonely time is not the best version, you know that, right?." He continued.

"That one person?" I asked him.

"Well, you understand it, don't you?. Anyway my point is, don't let loneliness makes you think that people can do anything freely to you as long as they're with you. Nothing lasts forever, Adrian. Even people." The observer closed his long speech, and nodded to allow me to talk.

"Thanks, observer. I keep that in mind. But if my stupid brain and stupid heart make any terribly wrong choices after this, please remind me again." I smiled.

"That's what i am here for, then, now, and tomorrow. Don't you worry about it." He smiled back.

That was the last conversation that i had with the observer before something happened a few days later. Something that he feared would happen. But i think it would be better if i tell about what happened that day, and the rest of August and September that year.

--

August had not been so kind to myself for its first two weeks. Clouds were passing by, sometimes the clouds were dark but no rain fell down. I was a bit disappointed, but whether it was raining or not, it wasn't my business. On the other side, a massive boredom caught me off guard and i, mostly, spent my time sleeping because of that. Fortunately the semester had not started yet.

I honestly didn't expect any kind of message from Lily anymore. I felt like i was the obstacle for her happiness. So receiving a message from her was the least thing in my mind at that time. But somehow, the thing you wanted to avoid the most could be the one you would encounter. It did happen on 8th of August. A message popped up in my phone's screen around 8pm.

"Are you busy tomorrow?" Lily said in her message.

"No, i'm not." I answered shortly.

"Can we meet. 3pm." She answered and sent me a location. It was nearby so i could reach it easily.

"Okay. See you tomorrow." I answered and no reply came.

Sounds like a stupid answer, don't you think? As much as i was trying to forget her, the moment she came back, all of it would be meaningless. I shouldn't have agreed with it. The domino effect of my answer that night had affected me pretty bad, even until months later. But regretting it won't change anything, will it?

The next day, we met in a Japanese restaurant. We ordered two bowls of ramen. I wouldn't lie if i said that the ramen on that restaurant was the best i've ever tasted, especially when i could add the pepper, salt, and some other ingredients by my own. I enjoyed my food thoroughly. But of course, i was waiting for a talk, from a girl who sat in front of me at that time. But none of us started it, until i finished half of my food.

"I'm sorry." She opened a conversation.

"Sorry for what?" I asked her.

"For what happened that day, and everything after that." She continued.

"Haha no problem. Not a problem at all. I know you must be so disappointed that day, so i don't blame you." I said as i put some black pepper in the bowl. I honestly wanted to avoid the topic at all cost. But as much as i wanted to do it, there was no escape.

"I still want you." She said after we went for another silence.

"Ummm, me too." That was my first mistake that day.

"Can we start over?" She continued.

"Ummm, okay, i think that way, too." That was my second mistake. Those two mistakes were not the type where you would know that they're wrong instantly, instead it took me nearly three months to realize how fatal those mistakes were.

"Thank you, Adrian. I love you." Lily said and laughed.

"I love you too." I answered.

"I want you to remember that i will always be there for you, unless you ask me otherwise." I continued and stopped.

"I've lost a few meaningful people in my life, but i hope you would stay, till the end." I finished my sentence and looked down. Waiting for her to give a response.

"There's no reason for me to push you away, you don't have to worry about it. I will make sure of it." She said as she held my hand. As i pulled my face and looked towards her, i saw her tilting her head and smiled. Just like how Sarah usually did. That small gesture hit different.

Sadly, that was the last time we had an enjoyable date. You might think that how this story happened was ridiculous. Two times of break-up so far, and two times of getting back together as well.

However, no matter how much i tried to convince myself that things would be fine, the sense of peace wasn't there at all. We might had been doing fine for the next 7 weeks after that meet in the Japanese restaurant, but i felt like i was being tortured, every single day.

Don't get it wrong, i didn't mean she harmed me in any way. But there was a burden within me that kept growing ever since that nightmare on the new year's eve. It kept growing and hit its peak on August and September that year. I had a continuous nightmare every night and got the attack at least twice every day. But i never told her. I decided that it was best if i kept it as a secret within myself. She would know in the right time. But unfortunately, it never happened. The thing she told me not to worry about, became the thing i had to face later that year.

--

"You became more unstable." The observer told me when i woke up around 3am, covered in sweat with shortness of breath. It was around the end of August or early September, 2020.

"It keeps happening this way since the last two weeks. I don't know what's happening." I told him after drinking a glass of water.

"You need some more rest. Like no thinking, no worrying, those kind of things." He said.

"You do know that it's impossible for me, right?" I asked him.

"I know. So, just be strong. I know you can do it. Just keep holding on, okay?" The observer said as he rubbed his coat towards the table.

"Anyway, why this keeps happening to me? Why i haven't found my peace yet? Why is it so hard to let things go? Why is it so hard, bruh?" I asked him again.

"You do have lots of questions eh. But unfortunately, i don't have any answer for you right now. You will find the answers soon, believe me." He said as he bursted a bit of laugh.

"I know the last few months have been a tough journey for you, but as people said, life teaches you in a very different way compared to your school's teachers. So, keep holding on, it ain't over yet." He continued. It felt like he repeated what he had said but in a more complicated way.

"I don't quite understand, but ok." I told him.

"You will understand it soon, Adrian." He said and smiled. Then disappeared in a blink of an eye.

As September turned into October. As days getting colder. And as my relationship with Lily kept going without any major events that neither made us closer or pulled us farther. The sadness overcame myself. I could feel that the orchid would die, sooner than later.

[stillshewanders]

god almost all of my love interests have been unrequited which really says a lot about me lmao. i don't develop them often but when i do they last for at least a year, maybe more. here's one: a few years ago (senior year of college, literally the last semester ugh) i developed an unrequited crush on one of my classmates that burned for a stupid long amount of time. looking back he definitely wasn't interested in me--i mean he was a fine friend, but i was way too focused on him for what i received--and we talked less and less after graduation. i basically just kept fantasizing about him in a way that wasn't even real in the end. i think the fact that i was feeling depressed, lonely, and lost made me cling to the idea of him longer than i should have. anyway after almost a year i just kinda forced myself to acknowledge reality and move on (this being part of a much larger and surprisingly successful effort to Get My Shit Together). it was for the best in the end bc i put a lot of work into tackling my physical and mental health and stopped begging for love from people who didn't want me, romantically or platonically. anyway long story short i'm in love with a wonderful person who i've been with for almost two years that started as a match making scheme by meddling friends. i was convinced it wouldn't work out, we made out at a NYE party the second time we met, my friends got the last laugh and the rest is history. i'm moving in with him in december and he was grilling me the other day on what kind of engagement ring style i like (although he's insisting it won't be until after i get through grad school so "he's not a distraction" lol) ❤️

okay we love a good unrequited recovery story!!!!! i just read the cocktail party by t. s. eliot and he talks about how easy it is to build up love for an imaginary person instead of a real one and it hits DIFFERENT sis. so glad you successfully moved away from that mindset <3