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shewhowantsmouseears · 7 years

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The Son Of Scheherazade, 2

Notes: As always, big thanks to my wonderful editors Drucilla and Blueshifted - i apologize for being unable to write fighting scenes. I loathe them so, yet I always need them.

Apologies for the delay in getting this out - I work retail, and with the holidays coming up, you can imagine how hard it's kicking my butt. In addition, let's just say there's some family drama going on. So thanks for baring with me! Our adventure has finally begun!

Originally the crew was just going to consist of 3 members, but I decided to add two extra birds for more comic relief and shenanigans. And who doesn't like shenanigans? Additionally, the big bad monsters were based off the Heartless from Kingdom Hearts.

Next chapter, we get the gal you've all been waiting for - Minnie Mouse arrives!

Summary: On the day he becomes an official man, Mickey is ready to take on the true responsibilities of being a prince. But is he ready to take on the dangers from an unknown enemy? When it looks like all hope is lost, he'll discover his mother's stories are more than legendary - they're alive!

One of the many luxuries that Councilor Pete had was his own private room in the castle. Sultana Scheherazade had wanted Pete to feel that he was not only a respected man of the royal court, but also family, if he so chose. It would be easy to call her naive, but she wasn't ignorant of Pete's selfish ways. She honestly believed that since she healed the Sultan's heart so many years ago, she could do the same to Pete. Unfortunately, there are souls who don't want to be saved.

That wicked soul was up at midnight, taking his time to carefully open a dark violet chest that contained many secrets. As far as the royal family knew, it was a gift from one of Pete's relatives that lived far away. But Pete didn't have any relatives that lived far away – no, this had been a gift for him and a curse for others. As the heavy chested opened, black smog began to spew forth, and a low voice spoke from within the shadows. “Is everything in place for tomorrow?”

Pete stuck up his thumb. “You got it! I've got it timed down to the second! Everything will be right on schedule!” He then hesitated, drawing out his 'but' as slowly as possible. “Buuut...”

“Don't test me, servant,” The voice growled, a pair of red eyes burning inside the smoke.

“I'm sure it's nothing!” Pete said very quickly, holding up his hands in defense. “It's just – I overheard the Sultana say a special guest was coming tomorrow, for the brat's birthday! But I can handle it! I know I can! It's probably just some fancy diplomat bringing even more gifts! That's all!”

The voice grumbled deeply, considering this matter. “You know I don't like changes to my plans. This had better be the only disruption.”

“It is, I swear it is!” Pete clasped his hands together, hoping the owner of the voice could see him beg. “I made absolutely sure of it! Come on, this is my chance to become Sultan, you know I wouldn't risk messing it up! You can count on me!”

After a tense, silent moment, the voice spoke again, now calmer. “Very well. You've come this far, I don't think you would fail me at our most important hour...for your sake.” Inside the box came the sound of thunder, and a black ball suddenly jumped out, landing in Pete's hands. It was cold as ice, and heavy as marble. “Once you've established that all three are alone, you will take this enchantment and place it under the sunlight. The beasts will be unleashed and will continue to spawn forth until you shatter the orb. One strike with your blade should suffice after the family has been taken care of.”

Pete held the orb up to his eyes, unable to stop grinning. Hard work had gotten him as far as Councilor, and now he had worked up to usurper. He had been chosen for this devious plan, and he was going to see it through until the end. Maybe then those foolish royals would understand that helping everyone and anyone could stab you in the back. His rule would be a fierce one, and if those peasants didn't earn their keep, they would have no one to blame but themselves. When a farmer leads a viper into his barn, he should expect to be bitten.

“You'll get yours, and I'll get mine,” Pete chuckled, watching the black smog begin to evaporate. “I bet even Scheherazade couldn't come up with a story as great as this!”

~*~

Once again, Mickey woke up earlier than he meant to. He didn't feel any different, which was unsurprising yet also disappointing. Manhood probably wasn't supposed to be instantaneous, but even just a hint of authoritative feeling would have cheered him up. He was still sad to have the mural leave along with his mother's stories, but surely in time he'd adjust. He hopped out of bed, checking on his beloved citizens from the balcony – after checking his height, which had yet to improve either, dang it – before going into his usual routine. He knew gifts were coming, and a lavish banquet, and singing and dancing and hooting and hollering, all for his day of birth – but in Mickey's frank opinion it was still another ordinary day. He got gifts and big meals and celebrations daily.

Still, as he entered the hallway and received his morning greetings -

“Happy birthday, oh son of Scheherazade!”

“We have always been blessed to have you with us, son of Scheherazade!”

“May your upcoming years be as happy and joyous, son of Scheherazade!”

- He put on a smile and tried to keep an upbeat attitude. Past birthdays told Mickey that breakfast was delayed until the presents were opened and they'd done at least three silly dances, so he headed to the throne room to get things rolling.

As Mickey began to open the large doors to the throne room, the golden doors in the shape of charging elephants, he could hear his parents talking – they seemed exasperated, but not in a deeply annoyed way. The Sultan was carrying a long, thin, brown box under his arm with decorative swirls of silver in the shape of soldiers battling. The Sultana was holding a large bundle in her arms, a clumsily wrapped heap of something that also had a long curious shape. Al's gift was refined and dignified, but the gift in Scheherazade's hands seemed like someone had tried to wrap it blindfolded and with one hand behind their back. Mickey blinked wildly to make sure he was seeing correctly. It wasn't like his mother to be so messy.

“So if I'm understanding this right,” Al was saying, biting on his cheek to keep from bursting into laughter, “He meant for it to arrive after he arrived here, but somehow it arrived before him?”

“You must admit, it's not a huge shock,” Scheherazade mused, fingering a ripped piece of wrapping. “Why, if it had been on time, I wouldn't have believed it was from him.” They shared a hearty chuckle over this matter. Pete was off in the corner, a large bulge in his upper right pocket, and he seemed to be glancing at the window every couple of minutes.

Mickey cleared his throat to announce his presence, and then tried to make a regal entrance – chin up, chest out, arms rigid, and ow, this was uncomfortable. “Ma, Pa – I mean, Mother, Father, good morning!”

His parents easily dropped the topic of conversation, their faces full of glee and excitement. “Happy Birthday, Mickey!” they chimed together, and Mickey had no doubt if their arms weren't full they would have scooped him up for endless hugs and kisses. Even now they appeared to be resisting the urge to toss aside their presents and do exactly that.

Mickey smiled – for all his hardships and loneliness, he did love his embarrassing family. “Thank you! Today, I'm an official man, one you will be proud of!”

Al laughed, arching his back. “He speaks as if we are not proud of him already!”

“We are proud of you, my son.” Scheherazade smiled a little sadly, still amazed that her baby had grown up so fast. “Every day, we are grateful to have you in our lives. We weren't whole until we had you. You will always be our pride and joy for the rest of our lives.”

Mickey knew they meant well, but the words didn't melt his heart as much as they did when he was a child. How could you be proud of someone who had accomplished nothing? It was just the loving nonsense of a parent. He glanced between the two differing gifts. “So which one of these is the paintbrush that'll be used on the mural?”

“We'll get to that later.” Al stepped forth. “Before giving you what you want, first we get to spoil you. I have two magnificent gifts for you today. The first...” he knelt down and held out the box. Mickey curiously approached it, clicking open a silver latch, allowing him to lift the box's cover.

Mickey's eyes widened. “Whoa! Is this really...?”

“Your pleas have not fallen on deaf ears,” Al assured his son. “But if you truly wish to see more of the outside world, you must be protected. Starting today, you will be trained in the art of the blade, and this shall be your weapon.”

Inside the box was a beautifully crafted scimitar, with blue and red jewels adorning the hilt, and Mickey could see his reflection in the gleaming sword. He let out a whoop of joy and yanked the scimitar out, feeling its weight in his hands. “This is amazing!” Mickey squealed, waving his newest possession here and there, stabbing the air and fighting imaginary thieves. “An actual sword! Oh gosh, look at this thing! Ha ha ha, this is the best!” He was going to look so cool wielding this! No one would dare mess with him when they saw him with this gorgeous beauty in his hand! Mickey the great, Mickey the bold, Mickey the – Only then did Mickey think that official men didn't flail with swords as if they were toys.

Mickey's cheeks burned red, and he cleared his throat once more, trying with great difficult to pretend the last couple of seconds hadn't happened. He put a hand to his heart, and bowed deeply. “Thank you for this beautiful gift, and for the trust you've placed in me. I promise to take this very seriously.”

Al grinned from ear to ear, feeling victorious at the joy he'd given his son. He couldn't help but smirk at his wife. “See, I told you, he's going to like mine the best, my dazzling heart.”

“The day's not over yet, oh key to my lock,” Scheherazade quipped back at him.

Mickey wondered if for his next birthday he could request his parents stop their obnoxious flirting, but thankfully Al was moving on, standing up and addressing Mickey. “As for my second gift, this will also come with great responsibility. I don't want you taking this lightly, because let me tell you, it wasn't easy getting it in here and keeping it in one place.” As fate would have it, the gift wasn't being kept in one place. Everyone in the room heard the sound of shouting guards, yelling at something to come back, slow down, stop, heel, anything to get it to freeze. Al rubbed his temples. “Me and my big mouth.”

Mickey turned around just as the gift barreled past the doors and bowled him over, standing on his chest. For a brief second Mickey thought of using his new blade to protect himself, but just as quickly there came a familiar sensation – of licks and drool and “yeah yeah yeah!”.

“Pluto?!” Mickey yelped, sitting up and letting the pup roll off him. The dog was clearly cleaner, having gone through several baths, and a shiny red collar had been placed around its neck – but there was no doubt about it, this was the same loving scamp from the alleyways. “I don't believe it! What are you doing here? You're supposed to be out in the village!” He paused abruptly, nervously eyeing his parents. “...Not that I would know because I don't sneak out there, no sir.”

As Pete quickly ran to close the doors – and lock them, once he saw no one was paying attention – Al waved a hand to shoo away the matter. “Leave the fables to your mother. The guards have seen you with this mutt enough times to have him memorized from tail to toes.”

Mickey ducked his head sheepishly until he understood, his eyes bright with hope. “Wait, does this mean...? I-I can keep him, I really can?”

Al smiled, moving to affectionately ruffle the fur between Mickey's ears. “I believe an official man is more than capable of taking care of a dog.”

In that instant Mickey completely forgot about his sword, dropping it to the ground so he could hug his new pet. “This is the best day ever!” he cheered, swinging the giddily yapping pup back and forth. “Oh, we're gunna do everything I promised you, Pluto! We're gunna play fetch every day, and you'll get to eat lots of steaks, and sleep on a bunch of pillows, and we're gunna be together all the time, you and me!” Maybe official men didn't act like this, but for that brief moment Mickey didn't care. He couldn't possibly imagine being happier than he was now. “Thank you, Pa! Thank you thank you thank you thaaaank youuu!”

Al grinned at his wife. “I win.”

“There is no winning when it comes to birthdays.”

“But if there was, I would be winning.”

Scheherazade had to call Mickey's name three times before he finally looked up from scratching Pluto's belly and telling him what a good boy he was – and he was such a good boy! Yes he was! - and remind him that she existed. “My sweetest son, I also have gifts for you.”

“Oh. Right.” Mickey couldn't imagine anything topping Pluto, but he didn't want to be rude.

The Sultana knelt down and laid down the present, her face taking on a serious tone that surprised Mickey. “My son, I have both longed for and dreaded this day. There are things you need to know, that I need to say, and I'm not sure how to make you understand. I can only hope I'll have your forgiveness, when you realize why I have held back the truth all these years.” She dug her fingers into the wrapping – it was so thin and loose it only needed one hand to unravel it all. “And so, I reached out to a dear companion of mine, in the hopes that you would understand. I asked him for this gift, and for his presence...” A click of her tongue. “Although he is late on the latter count.”

Mickey glanced at Pluto, who merely shrugged, at Al, who was nodding solemnly, and then at Pete, who was far more interested in the windows. “Ma, what's going on?”

Once the gift was unwrapped, she laid it out flat. “This is my first gift.” After all that mysterious narration, the gift that held the weight of the world was...

… A carpet.

“Huh?” It was out before Mickey could control it. All that build-up for a rug? It wasn't ugly, he supposed – it matched his sword, with bright threads of blue and red, but this time it was in elaborate pattern of intricate flowers blossoming together. It was kind of girly – he liked it, but men didn't like girly things. It was also very small – weren't carpets supposed to roll on for ages and cover the entire floor? It looked only slightly bigger than Mickey was, which wasn't saying much. Pluto sniffed one of the four golden tassels, detecting an odd odor that none of the others could pick up.

At the window, the clouds were beginning to part, and the sun's rays began to shine into the room. Pete began to fish inside his pocket.

Mickey fumbled for more polite words. “It's, uh... it's really nice! Thanks, Ma!” He scrambled mentally to find more descriptive words. “It's... colorful!”

Scheherazade smiled, standing back up, and from the look on her face Mickey could tell she was about to weave another story. “This is no ordinary carpet, my son.”

But there would be no explanation or epic tale to be told. The moment Pete held out the enchanted orb and allowed the sunlight to touch it, it spat out a gigantic massive black hole that stood as tall and wide as the palace doors. It made a horrific roaring noise, and all the warmth in the room dropped into freezing cold. The family members yelled in surprise, having only enough time to do that before the hole began to spin around, making a hideous sucking sound as harsh winds began to force everything and everyone towards it - elegant tapestries from the walls, the discarded wrapping from the carpet, it even had enough force to swallow the Sultan's throne. Pete was forced to sit, overwhelmed by what he had unleashed. Mickey's mouth was open but no words came out. What was he looking at? What was happening? He was struck numb by the sheer impossibility of what was happening, and part of him wanted to shut his eyes and wake up, because this couldn't be reality. Magic wasn't real, yet what else could you call this awful thing that made no earthly sense?

Sultan Al grabbed his wife, Pluto sunk his teeth into Mickey's pant leg to hold on, and Mickey desperately reached for his mother as all of them began to slide towards the hole. “Ma! Pa!” Mickey cried out, confusion and fear taking over all rational thought. The ravenous hole's roar was so loud Mickey was afraid his parents couldn't hear him, and now it was becoming so strong the windows began to crack before shattering. It was swallowing up the thrones, curtains, and all the decorative vases and paintings lining the walls. Within seconds, it would swallow up the Sultan and those he loved.

Scheherazade looked around wildly, and then pushed Mickey on his shoulders. “Get on the carpet!”

“What? What are you talking about?!”

There was no time to explain things. She reached down to pick up the boy and his dog, fighting as hard as she could against the hole's pull on her, and threw them towards the carpet, which had been mere seconds away from being sucked up as well. Mickey barely registered what happened as they smacked onto the fabric – and then he was up, he and Pluto were up, the carpet was up – the carpet was floating! It then shot into the air, which allowed Mickey to see Pete running for the doors, leaving them to their fate. Mickey held on for dear life, and Pluto held onto him. Mickey yelled for his mother and father who couldn't resist the hole's gravitational pull anymore, their bodies being yanked into the unknown darkness. First went their legs, then went their hips, their stomachs...

“MA! PA!” He reached for them even though he was so far away, a part of him still in serous disbelief that this could be happening at all. Not his beloved family, not his amazing family, they could do anything, and now they were being pulled away by something that had no right to exist. It couldn't be happening, but it was happening, and Mickey had never felt so utterly pathetic and useless in all his life. What could he do? How do you fight something that made no sense? His fingers tore at the carpet, trying to make it move. “You – you – whatever you are, put me down! Let me save them! Ma! Pa!” But the carpet remained in the air, unwilling to budge. Frustrated beyond words, Mickey tried to jump off the carpet – but now the carpet did move in order to catch him, and he let out a yelp as he tumbled back onto the familiar colors. “Stop it! Let me go! MA! PA!” His voice became hoarse with screams – he'd take everything back, he'd keep the title of Son of Scheherazade forever, abandon his own name, if he could just keep his mother and father – it wasn't fair, wasn't fair, wasn't fair -

The Sultan and Sultana held each other, their eyes staying on their beloved son.

“Our son-”

“We will-”

And then they were gone, lost to whatever inky blackness lay behind the hole. Mickey cried out once more, tears rolling down his cheeks, and he shut his eyes. Maybe if he wished really hard, he'd wake up from this nightmare, and he'd take back what he said about his mother's stories and he'd let the mural stay up and he'd be a child forever, if it meant he could keep everything the way it was. The winds began to die down... and then reverse.

The hole now began to spin counterclockwise, and a massive shadowy claw emerged. It dragged the rest of its body out in the open – a hulking beast with rich red eyes, a broken heart symbol on its back, a zigzag yellow mouth, and mismatching colors of purple and gold coating its rough body. Mickey had never seen such a creature before, and only then did the carpet begin to descend – which was now the exact opposite of what Mickey wanted. “Now you listen to me!”

The beast moved its dark eyes toward the sound, and swiped its massive paw at the mouse, knocking him off the carpet. Mickey grunted as he hit the floor, and then rolled quickly to avoid a second swipe. When he managed to get his footing, he could see the carpet still flying, this time only with Pluto. “Fine! Whatever you are, protect my dog, or I'm gunna pull out every single loose thread you have!” The beast began to run towards him, and Mickey ran as fast as he could before remembering his father's other present. The scimitar could be of help – if Mickey had any idea how to use it. He pulled it into his hands and waved it back and forth, struggling to block off every swipe from the monster. That one part of his brain continued to insist this couldn't be real – and the rest of his brain finally told it to SHUT UP, because this thing was certainly real enough to kill him! He wasn't imagining the painful claw marks on his arm or the snarling in his ears. This was happening, and no amount of wishing otherwise was going to stop it – which was very unfortunate because Mickey had no idea how to stop it any other way.

Then he heard a great “thud” - a second beast had walked out of the portal, and then a third, each one different in size and form but carrying the same colors and symbol on their back. Mickey's eyes flew around for any way to escape this danger, and he saw Pete reentering the room, this time with a handful of guards.

“These creatures took the lives of our beloved Sultan and family!” Pete announced, his own sword drawn. “But fear not! I will not allow them to harm anyone else!” He then darted into the room, stabbing the second beast in the leg – where the broken-heart symbol had been – and it jerked, freezing in place before dissolving into ash. The guards gasped with astonishment, and Pete soaked in the praise. “Today, I will lead you to victory! All for the sake of our fallen rulers!”

“The Son of Scheherazade!” one guard pointed out, trying to signal Pete that someone was still in danger.

“Yes, yes, sad to lose him too.” Pete rolled his hand, trying to move things along.

“No, the Son of Scheherazade is right there, and right in danger!”

“Huh?” Pete turned his head, and saw exactly the guard had meant. Mickey was trying to use a toppled table as a fort and failing. As Pete watched the beast shred it in two, his jaw dropped. “What the – what's he still doing here?!” He then drew a breath. “I mean... oh! How... lucky! He's still around... somehow... But I'm still the hero! Now if everyone could stop interrupting so I can finish these evil beasts...” He fished again for the enchanted orb – and again – and again – the pocket was not infinite yet he continued to search, the confident expression he was wearing now jerking into frantic fury. “C'mon, you lousy little...” It couldn't have just grown legs and walked away! Pete had it on him when he first used it to get rid of the rulers, he held the orb out into the sun, it spat out the hole, the force of it knocking him on his butt, and - and then understood that when he first fell, he had dropped it, and he had no idea where it rolled off. “Ah, crud.” The longer he delayed destroying the enchantment, the more monsters would come. He planned to get rid of one or two – now there were seven, eight, nine... “... This is also not good.”

While Pete quietly began to panic, the guards rallied, “Protect the Son of Scheherazade!”, storming into the room with their blades drawn. Yet try as they might, the monsters smashed them aside, destroying the room and now having several targets to choose from. Even more beasts continued to spill from the portal, growing in number with each passing minute. If this kept up, the monsters would flood the palace, and invade the kingdom.

Mickey was making another run, trying to lend his help towards the guards. Even though he understood he couldn't possibly fight these monsters, no amount of logic or wisdom would prevent him from helping someone in need. But even if he did save one guard, what would happen next? They'd be in danger within the next minute. Mickey's heart beat with fear, cold sweat dripping from his fur. Is this where he was going to die? His guards, Pluto, he was even concerned for Pete – would all their lives be forfeit by forces they didn't understand? Would he die with no accomplishments to his name, a life that hadn't actually been lived? Was fate truly going to be so cruel?

Mickey tried to turn and stab at the same time, he lost his footing and fell onto his back, the sword sliding across the floor. The first beast pounced on him, Mickey felt his heart stop, his mind now so overwhelmed it shut down, refusing to work , refusing to acknowledge anything but incoming death, and he covered his head with his arms as if that would do any good – the monster raised its paw, ready to deal the final blow...

But instead was given one, as a long sword struck through its back – through the same symbol- and stuck out its belly. As Mickey stared it evaporated into ashes, and his savior slowly held up his blade, blowing off the dust. “Well then...” A country voice clicked its tongue. “Either this is the wildest birthday party I done ever got invited to, or I think you got some uninvited guests!”

There stood a lanky, tall, black-furred dog with long floppy ears and buck teeth as big as his innocent eyes. He was skinny as a pole, his clothes looking ready to fall off if he sneezed hard enough. He wore a giant puffy orange top, and his green pants sagged so much one could almost miss his orange and green stockings. He clicked his black shoes together, and scratched his head, nudging the green bandanna with orange spots that was wrapped around his skull. The color scheme was familiar to Mickey, as if he'd seen it a million times somewhere else, but the man himself was a stranger. He shrugged, and then offered a hand to Mickey, smiling pleasantly. “Up and at 'em!”

Mickey took the hand, but he shook as he spoke, still very much aware of the danger they were in. “Who are... How did you... What is...”

“Name's Goofy,” the man chirped, as chipper as if they were in paradise instead of pandemonium, “Just arrived, and I got as much of an idea about what's goin' on as you do.” Once Mickey was on his feet, Goofy let go to survey the damage being done. The guards had put up a valiant effort but they were all knocked over left and right. It was all they could do to keep from being ripped apart, using whatever weaponry they had left to put some distance between themselves and the monsters. Pete himself was heroically hiding behind a now beheaded statue of the Sultan. “Looks like the weak spot is them funny symbols. I heard of wearin' your heart on your sleeve before, but on your back? That's a new one. We might need a little bit of help.”

“The other guards won't be able to do a thing!” Mickey protested. “Look around, the ones we have don't stand a chance!” The only one who was successfully dodging the beasts was the carpet, flying high enough in the air that it could avoid most swipes and leaps – until the monsters began to pile on top of each other. Pluto snarled, trying to bite at any that came close enough.

Goofy continued to smile. “I'm sure they're doin' their best, but I kinda meant more a different sort of help.” He then stuck two fingers into his mouth, and whistled so high that even Pluto winced. He then counted to five, and that's when ten bullets shot through the throne doors – enough to make them fall over.

“WEEEEE ARE THE TWO CABALLEROOOOS!” The man behind the assault was a red rooster, singing at the top of his lungs as his silver guns smoked. His wicker sombrero was twice as big as his head, and his brown belt appeared to wrap around him in seven different ways with endless bullets of differing variety. He then frowned, and cocked his head. “No, no, that still doesn't sound right.” He then saluted, accidentally firing off one of his guns as he did so – Pete's hat now had a nice little hole and he had a nice little heart attack. “¡Mi capitán! At your service!”

Goofy waved at him. “Hurry on up, Panchito! Aim for the hearts, and find out how these things are gettin' in!”

“As you command! WE HAAAAVE THE STARS TO GUIIIDE US!” The eager bird jumped in the air, firing off several rounds with each joyful jump he made. Each shot hit the target, the heart-broken symbol, causing monsters to fall apart left and right. All the while he continued to come up with sillier and sillier lyrics – any guard that wasn't trying to fend for their own life stopped to stare, deeply grateful and deeply confused at the help that just arrived.

Mickey could barely comprehend what was happening in his own home. “Why is he singing while he's gunslinging?”

… Wait. Why did that sound familiar...?

But the rooster hadn't been alone. “I had so looked forward to seeing the legendary beauty, Scheherazade!” Now at the entrance was a green parrot, decked in pale fancy attire, the brim of his small hat tipped down. He puffed on a dying cigar, and he leaned on his black umbrella, lamenting his woes. “How can I go on? I will never know love again!” In seconds he noticed some of the fighting guards were female. “...What do you know, there it is! Eeeeeiiiii lindo, como você está?” He picked up his umbrella, and stuck his lit cigar on the top – within seconds, his entire umbrella was on fire, and with every swing of his arm it sent a flurry of flames towards his foes. “Out of the way, I have a date!” Pete dared to peek out from behind his hiding place – who were these weirdos and why were they arriving at the knick of time?

Goofy shrugged helplessly at the parrot's antics. “Sometimes I think that José does more charm than harm.”

Mickey balked – that was familiar too!

The last to arrive came as a duo, a man and a woman, exasperated and exhausted. “Captain!” the lady cow shouted, her purple top soaked with sweat, a cowbell dangling around her neck, and her short leggings ready to fall down. “Why did you run off ahead of us again? We told you to cut that out! It's not a dynamic entrance if we go one at a time, now it just looks silly!”

“If he didn't listen to you before, what makes you think he's gunna do it now?” the male horse grumbled, adjusting his red bandanna so it would stop falling in front of his eyes. His long brown slacks almost passed his feet, and his blue shirt was ripped in three different places. “And great, we got monsters. I'd kill for a week, a single week, without seeing or hearing the word 'monsters'!”

“Oh, all you ever do is complain!”

“You were just complaining five seconds ago!”

“I wasn't complaining, I was giving a helpful suggestion!”

“If that's helpful, I'd hate to see harmful!”

As they argued with each other, a monster from each side jumped at them – but the horse launched one powerful fist, and the cow served up a hearty good kick, sending their attacks flying... and then they went back to arguing, the light glinting off the wedding bands on their fingers, a true killer couple.

Killer couple – yes, Mickey knew that too! Mickey stepped back as he surveyed what was really happening around him – these nutty strangers who were taking down all the beasts with ease, with bullets and fire and fists and kicks, singing and dancing and arguing, like they had done in the stories he'd heard so many times throughout his life. The monstrous numbers began to dwindle, but Mickey couldn't count – Goofy had suddenly lifted him before another beast could tackle him down. “If we could find out where that darn black hole came from...” Goofy tucked Mickey under one arm, and began to use his sword with the other. “In my experience,” he continued, slicing through each attacker and dodging every blow with precise footwork, “Those kinda things come from a source,” With every jump he flew, and during one fight, he tossed Mickey up, stabbed a beast to kill it, and then caught Mickey as he came down, “So if we find it, we're done!” It was all very heroic, dashing, and...impossible.

He couldn't be real. This couldn't be true. Mickey couldn't believe it, not even with all the signs in front of his face. It didn't make any sense. So he tried to shove away what he couldn't conceive, and stuck to what was happening right that second. Where the black hole came from – some kind of extra source – an addition to the room that hadn't been there before – something they couldn't see at their angle and height - “Pluto!” Mickey shouted over Goofy's shoulder. “Fetch, boy, fetch!”

Upon hearing the command, Pluto yipped and jumped from the carpet, bouncing on the floor and running around, trying to find something that had been dropped. He ducked and weaved around the bigger beasts until he found a ball! Ball good, ball fetch, ball give! He grabbed it with his teeth – it was cold and heavy, but Pluto could never give up when his master asked him anything. He then ran as fast as his four legs would take him towards his friend, and Mickey hopped out of Goofy's arms. “Give, Pluto, give!”

Pluto was more than happy to spit out the disgusting toy, and Goofy held his sword with two hands, slamming it down into the orb. The orb shattered instantly, breaking down into colorless glass, and with it, all the beasts fell apart and vanished, leaving dust and ash behind, with the portal itself dying last, swirling around and shrinking until it vanished completely. Mickey slowly lifted his head to look at the man who had dealt the death blow, who was using his bandanna to wipe sweat off his brow.

Mickey swallowed, unable to fathom the words he was going to ask. “Are you... Are you really...” The legendary hero, the idol Mickey worshiped, the most famous fictional being in all of Sultana Scheherazade's tales, “Are you... Sinbad the Sailor?”

Goofy blinked twice as he put his sword back in its scabbard and began to tie his bandanna back on. “Huh? Oh, well, right, that's my birth name. Without the sailor part, a'course. I'd say I'm more of a pirate. But everyone calls me Goofy! Well, not everyone, but my friends do! And friends count for more than everyone, don't they? So think of me as Sinbad and Goofy! But more Goofy than Sinbad. But don't tell my mama that, she done named me after all, so to her, I'm more Sinbad than Goofy. But she's not here now, so I guess it's okay to just say Goofy! Goofy the Pirate!”

Mickey's mind blanked. His hero was not only real, but he was also a complete goofball. “Oh. Kay.” It was all he could utter. He needed time to process everything that happened and he had no idea how long that time would be. He had a feeling he wouldn't get it.

Goofy offered a hand to shake. “And who might you be?”

Mickey was still so bewildered that he didn't think before answering. “The Son of Scheherazade – No! I'm Mickey, I'm Prince Mickey!”

Now that got the crew's attention. “The Son of Scheherazade!” all four voices shouted at once, and in seconds Mickey lost all his personal space.

Panchito was rapidly shaking Mickey's right hand and speaking so fast the prince could barely make out a word. “So this is the famous son! This is an honor, a true honor, a real treat! I am Panchito Romero Miguel Junipero Francisco Quintero González The Third, but I insist you call me Panchito, for now we are more than friends! In the heat of battle, we are brothers! ¡Hermano a hermano!”

José was shaking Mickey's left hand and while he was going slower and calmer, it was just a different brand of lunacy. “José Carioca am I, and the honor is given to us all! I can't wait to hear all the stories you've cooked up in that little head of yours. Personally I favor stories of love and romance, but look who I'm talking to! I bet you've got enough girlfriends to line around the world twice! By the way, those lady guards, they are single, yes?”

“Awww, ain't he just the cutest little boy you ever done seen?” the cow was cooing, hands to her cheeks. “And look how small he is, he's travel-sized! Don't you just want to eat him up? I have to pinch those cheeks!”

“Clarabelle!” The horse tugged on Clarabelle's long black braid. “You don't pinch the cheeks of a prince! You gotta bow and curtsy! Ain't got no matters, you don't, ain't a single one!” He then cleared his throat and did a sweeping bow so low he nearly fell over. “Greetings, your highness! I am Horace Horsecollar, and this here is my wife, Clarabelle.”

Mickey could barely keep up with this flood, and when he found some control of his body he yanked his hands back. “H-Hold on a second!” He wanted to ask how they got here, why they were here, and about his mother, but what came out instead was, “Do you really have a magical flying ship?”

“Yup!” Goofy answered. “It rides on the wind, and as long as we know where we're going, it never has to stop!”

“D-did you really fight the living dead?”

“An oxymoron, but yes,” Horace sighed, as that wasn't a fond memory. “Took forever to get the smell out of our clothes.”

“Did you really-”

“WHO ARE YOU WEIRDOS AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” Pete roared, having finally gotten over his shock. He stormed over, pushing the group away from Mickey, his teeth smashing together as he barked. “You... you guys are trespassing!”

“Guests can't be trespassers,” Goofy calmly replied. “Scheherazade invited me and my crew here to celebrate her son's birthday!”

Pete slowly pointed at Goofy, wondering how he was going to explain things to his shadowy superior. “You... you are the special guest she was going on about? That can't be right! Sinbad's made-up, he's just a story, he ain't real!”

Goofy blinked, and then poked his cheeks before nodding affirmatively. “I feel pretty real to me!”

Mickey tried to work his mouth and couldn't, all the questions in his brain fighting to see who would go next. This was what his mother was trying to admit? This was what she was trying to say before she - she – she was gone! “My parents!” Mickey exclaimed, remembering what had happened to his family. “They're gone! I... I don't know what happened, but they're gone!” He then turned to Pete, trying to get any forgotten details in. “You saw it too, didn't you? What happened to them?”

The guards that had begun picking themselves up began to approach the ragtag group, having their own questions. “Councilor, didn't you say the creatures took their lives?”

“Uhhh.”

“No they didn't!” Mickey ran to where the black hole once stood. “They got sucked into this... this... big dark thing! It was the same thing that popped out all those monsters! Pete, you saw it for yourself! They're still alive!”

“Uhhh.” Pete drew this one out longer, sweat rolling down his fur. “Right! Of course. Guess I just... got the details... jumbled up, because of how scary it was!”

“We have to find them!” Mickey turned back around, both his dog and now his carpet laying obediently at his feet. “I don't know where they are, but there was a reason it took them away instead of letting the monsters maul them!”

Goofy snapped his fingers, impressed. “That's smart thinkin', kiddo! Your parents must be held somewhere!” With that settled, he turned to his crew, hands on his hips. “All right, we've got a new adventure ahead of us! Let's head back to the ship and start planning!”

“Another adventure already?” Clarabelle groaned. “I thought we'd finally have a chance to kick back and relax...” But that was all the argument she put up, as she and the crew began to head for the demolished doors.

“W-wait!” Mickey shouted, running up and grabbing Goofy by the hand. “You have to let me come with you! I can't just stay here knowing my parents are in danger!”

Goofy tilted his head, giving this some thought. “But what about your kingdom? Without the Sultan and Sultana, someone's gotta rule in their place.”

Mickey fumbled for an idea, and then turned to gesture at Pete. “You! Councilor! I'm officially putting you in charge until Ma and Pa are home!”

Pete opened his mouth, and then closed it. Had luck finally decided to grace him? “Uh-I-of course!” He grinned, rubbing his hands together. “That's a great idea! You should go and look for your parents.” And hopefully die along the way. “I'll stay here and keep the throne warm until you get back. Take the kid, I'm sure he's good for something!”

“I dunno.” Horace frowned, looking Mickey up and down. “What can you bring to the table?”

“I...” Mickey trailed off. What could he do that the others couldn't? He barely knew how to fight, he couldn't plan, and he had no clues about the outside world. Harsh reality told Mickey that he'd be nothing more than a burden. “I don't... I can't...”

“Didn't think so.” Horace clicked his tongue, and then gently pushed his wife along. “We'd better start charting our next location on the map, get new supplies and all.”

Mickey stared as the crew began to resume their walk, treating this next adventure like it was merely another day in their life. Goofy kept glancing back, as if waiting for something. Mickey's hands clenched up into fists. All his life, he'd never felt something like this burning in his chest. It built, and strengthened, and for once Mickey refused to merely sit there licking his wounds. He wouldn't sit back in the shadows anymore. This was his life, and he was going to live it.

“I AM PRINCE MICKEY, SON OF SCHEHERAZADE!” he suddenly shouted as hard as he could, making everyone around him stop in place. “I DEMAND TO BE TAKEN ABOARD THIS INSTANT!” He couldn't remember the last time he'd gotten this angry, this determined, and he refused to back down. He'd sneak aboard if he had to, he'd threaten if he had to – his parents were in unspeakable danger, and he was not going to be cast aside, not this time!

That's when Goofy slapped him on the shoulder. “There we go! That's all we needed to hear!”

Mickey's anger was snuffed out like a candle hitting the water. “What?”

“We don't take on anyone who doesn't have spirit!” Goofy slapped him again, moving Mickey along. “Now you can join us! Welcome to the crew!”

“A son's love for his family...” Panchito looked ready to weep. “Is there anything more touching?”

José offered Panchito a tissue. “A quest to save a beautiful woman! I think I could die happy. But I'd prefer not to die.”

“Who knows, this might come in handy!” Clarabelle approached the rug that now lay still on the floor and rolled it up.

“Sorry about the little jab,” Horace gave a thumbs up. “But it's like the Captain says – you wanna sail, you gotta have spirit!”

Mickey looked from one happy face to another, momentarily astonished that they all were so happy to have him along – until he realized it was only because he was the son of Scheherazade. Of course, that's how it always was. “I guess... you all must know my Ma pretty well, huh?”

“Nope,” said Panchito.

“Never met her,” said José .

“Same here,” said Clarabelle.

“Ditto,” said Horace.

“Just met her the once,” Goofy finished, shrugging. “And that was a real long time ago. Come to think of it, I dunno how she knew where I was when she sent that invitation, since I'm always sailing the skies.”

Mickey blinked slowly. Something wasn't adding up. “Wait...if she never met you guys, how did she know about all your adventures, and who you are? How did she know where Goofy would be? And why did she let us all think you were all made-up stories?”

Silence fell over the crowd, not having a single answer to any of his questions. The only thing Mickey could conclude was that whatever his mother had been about to confess, it wasn't just about her stories. Did it have something to do with why and how she and his father were snatched away?

Goofy huffed, and then clapped his hands. “Welp! We're not gunna find out by just standing here! We gotta head to the ship and set out for supplies before we hit the road! Or the sand. Or the clouds. Panchito, get out all of our maps!”

Panchito saluted. “You can always count on Panchito Romero Miguel Junipero Francisco Quintero González The Third! YOU'LL FIND ME BENEATH MY SOMBREROOOOO!” He shot off like a bullet, his songs bouncing with every hot step he took.

“José, set a course for the city of Mawarid!”

José tipped his hat. “I won't let a single pretty face slow me down.” he twirled his umbrella, which was as perfectly normal as before, and set off with a hum.

“Clarabelle, Horace, take stock of our inventory!”

Clarabelle heaved the rolled-up rug onto her shoulder. “That reminds me, my birthday is coming up! You all better get me something nice!”

“Your birthday isn't for another eight months!” Horace snapped, and another argument brewed as they walked, each step a new debate.

Goofy stuck his hands into his pockets and walked on, each step slow and careful so he wouldn't trip. “Mind if I put you in charge of the crow's nest for the day, Mickey?”

Mickey stopped, and looked at Goofy. “What... what did you call me?”

Goofy glanced back at him with a raised eyebrow. “Mickey. That's your name, ain't it?”

Today had been terrible – Mickey's parents were prisoners somewhere, he had to leave his beloved home, and past the palace was a world full of unknown dangers and consequences. On top of all that, his mother, his loving and wise mother, had been keeping secrets from him and the kingdom.

Yet despite all that, Mickey began to smile. Yes, that was his name. “Y-Yeah., He stammered, the smile threatening to cover his whole face. “Yeah! That's my name! Mickey!” His breath came quicker, exhilaration running through his body. Here was his chance to earn his name, to earn his own story and legend. He turned back to take one last look at his people – his guards were bowing low, quietly wishing him luck on the journey, and Pete kept grinning, looking fairly pleased at how events were turning out. Pluto was wagging his tail, Mickey's scimitar still in its mouth.

Mickey gently took the weapon from the dog, twirling it around once. He didn't know if he was ready for such an epic task before him, but he was too excited to care.

A journey to a dangerous place, madcap characters, mystery around every corner – it had every making of one of his mother's stories. But now this was his story.

“This is a new chapter – let's get started!”

#disney #fanfic #son of scheherazade #mickey mouse #goofy #horace horsecollar #clarabelle cow #panchito pistoles #jose carioca

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recentanimenews · 4 years

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EXCLUSIVE: Amazon Takes Light Novels, Manga From the Kindle Bookshelf: Publishers Respond

Over the last few months, rumors began to swirl that Amazon US had been delisting certain manga and light novel series from its Kindle platform. While more and more users noticed that favorites such as No Game No Life, How Not to Summon A Demon Lord, and Grimgar of Fantasy and Ash had been delisted, publishers hadn’t spoken out about the issue, until now.

J-Novel Club released a statement on their Twitter account on July 14 informing readers that many of their titles had been delisted. Yen Press followed suit half a day later with their own statement.

We verified today that starting July 11th, all books in the series The Greatest Magicmaster's Retirement Plan, I Shall Survive Using Potions (Manga+LN), How Not to Summon a Demon Lord, and Clockwork Planet (LN) are no longer available for sale on Amazon Kindle (except .co.jp)

— J-Novel Club (@jnovelclub) July 14, 2020

Sadly, we have confirmed with Amazon that they have opted to remove our No Game No Life titles from their platform. Happily, there are other retailers, both physical and digital, that are thrilled to help you support for these titles in the form of cash exchanged for goods! pic.twitter.com/xDbXGFvyBs

— Yen Press (@yenpress) July 14, 2020

Crunchyroll News reached out to J-Novel Club, Yen Press, and Amazon, as well as other publishers who were not able to comment in time for publication, to get the full story of what was happening, why it may be happening, and what can be done about it.

As of publication, Amazon has not yet given their statement to Crunchyroll News. We will update the story if it becomes available.

J-Novel Club founder Sam Pinansky told Crunchyroll News that the first instance of a light novel being delisted was in the first week of May when two separate volumes of How NOT to Summon a Demon Lord were taken off the digital store. Pinansky said that after multiple attempts to contact Amazon, J-Novel Club wasn’t given any clear reasoning on why the books were delisted, so the company “attempted to reupload the two books,” but a week later one of them was taken down again, with the rest of the series being delisted on May 11.

"Despite being very upset about the situation we can only send more email queries to the Kindle content review team, which will only reply to us (eventually) with the same generic emails," Pinansky said.

Kurt Hassler, the Managing Director of Yen Press said in a statement provided to Crunchyroll News that they were “disappointed whenever it becomes more difficult for books to find their way into the hands of enthusiastic readers.” Though Yen Press only first learned about their titles being delisted through an automated email last week, Hassler explained.

Pinansky said that despite multiple attempts over the last few months to get in contact with anyone on a review team at Kindle through email, they rang the support phone line and requested support tickets, doing so 10 or 12 times. “Phone support has no power to override or obtain any further information from Kindle Content Review.” Though all J-Novel Club got in response from Amazon after multiple nine-day waits are a generic email which reads:

“As stated in our guidelines, we reserve the right to determine what we consider to be appropriate, which includes cover images and content within the book. We’re unable to elaborate further on specific details regarding our content guidelines beyond what is available here."

According to Pinansky, no clarification on which of the guidelines was broken and that “if there is a review process that's actually going on, it is a complete black-box and the opposite of transparent.”

Hassler explained that “after reaching out [to Amazon] for clarification on the matter, [Yen Press] were informed that a determination had been made that the books did not fall within their global content guidelines.”

While the light novels and manga have been delisted from Amazon US, J-Novel Club said on Twitter that the English versions of the same volumes – alongside the Japanese editions – were still available. Pinansky speculated that “content review teams for each language are separate.” It should be noted that the print version of How NOT to Summon A Demon Lord is still available, which Pinansky speculated, “All this means is that this is not the result of some consistent policy being applied. It is the very definition of arbitrary and capricious.”

Pinansky further theorized that because the delisting started in May, and has appeared to become even more aggressive since then, that “this is due to the Kindle Content Review black box beginning to rely more heavily on automated systems to detect problematic content ... due to COVID-19, so my suspicion is they sped up the process and cut out a significant amount of human checking relying on some auto-recognition system.”

Pinansky hopes that, “Once the virus situation is under proper control, Amazon will restaff or reconfigure the content review department to actually be able to do their job correctly.”

“While we obviously wish [the removed titles] were still available,” Hassler said, “making the decision as to what to offer their patrons is obviously the prerogative of the seller. Nevertheless, we’re grateful to the fans who have expressed their support and to the many other outlets that continue to make the books readily available.”

Pinansky also informed Crunchyroll News that he reached out to Jeff Bezos’ personal email address, and was once again given the same generic email in response.

List of light novels and manga that have been down from the Kindle store:

The Greatest Magicmaster's Retirement Plan (Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

I Shall Survive Using Potions (Manga and Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

How NOT to Summon a Demon Lord (Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

Clockwork Planet (Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

Grimgar of Fantasy and Ash Volume 1 (Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

Infinite Stratos Volume 3 (Light Novel) - J-Novel Club

No Game No Life (Light Novel) - Yen Press

Oreimo (Light Novel) - Dark Horse Comics

Eromanga Sensei (Light Novel) - Dark Horse Comics

While the above titles are now unavailable on Kindle they are still available from BOOK WALKER, NOOK, Google Books, Apple Books, KOBO, and many more outlets, including physical bookstores and retailers.

Thanks to Crunchyroll News editor Joe Luster for additional assistance with interviews.

----

Daryl Harding is a Japan Correspondent for Crunchyroll News. He also runs a YouTube channel about Japan stuff called TheDoctorDazza, tweets at @DoctorDazza, and posts photos of his travels on Instagram.

By: [email protected]

#Anime #News #Latest in Anime News by Crunchyroll!

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gunfetishinamerica · 5 years

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The Fetishization of Guns in America

“Products change and fashions rise and fall. But the architecture of the human mind is ancient, and the most basic human needs- to belong, to escape, to aspire, to understand, to be understood- are eternal.” Derek Thompson, Hit Makers

Remember when a Mass Shooting was a big deal? Back in ’99 when the Columbine shooting happened, the entire world came to a halt. How could this happen? How could we let it? Fingers were pointed, musical artists, comic books and video games were to blame. Everyone had an answer. Then things calmed down. For a bit. Come to the present day and, as sad as it is to say, whenever I see a shooting headline in my news feed I tend to just scroll by and think “oh well only two dead, thank god.” THAT should not be how we view these events. Numb to innocents being indiscriminately killed in the streets. The Fetishization of guns in America has led to the terrifying normalization of random murder in America.

So far in 2019, there have been 451 deaths due to mass shootings in America with another 1432 people wounded from a mass shooting event (Mass Shooting Tracker). And the year isn’t even over. On average we had 50 or so deaths a month from a mass shooting this year with another 159 or so injuries due to mass shootings. That tells me at least 150 more Americans will die by the end of the year by the hands of someone they probably don’t know; indiscriminately spraying bullets in a public place. One Hundred and Fifty people. In the next three months. I don’t like those numbers. There had been 40 major mass shootings between the Columbine shooting in 1999 and the Las Vegas shooting in 2017. We averaged one mass shooting or so a year to about three or four MAJOR mass shootings a year by 2017 (LA Times). Why is this happening? It’s the guns. As simple as that.

Countries with no guns legally available for citizens to purchase have a much, MUCH smaller percentage of gun deaths per year than countries with guns readily available. In 2014, Japan saw a total of six-gun deaths. Six for an entire year! Compared to the U.S. which had 33,599-gun deaths in that exact same year (Aoki). Let that sink in for a second. There were over thirty-three THOUSAND-gun deaths more in American than Japan in one year. But Guns don’t kill people! People kill people! Well, the statistics clearly show that when a country doesn’t have guns readily available to the public, it becomes much harder to then actually commit crimes and murder with said guns. It is as plain as day. But It’s my second amendment right to have my guns! The NRA and those who favor guns always seem to have a clever little saying to protect their toys. Forget what actual facts say, they will come up with any reason to shift the blame. It’s the violent video games! Not the guns! After the recent back to back shootings in Dayton, Ohio and El Paso, Texas in August, mega retail chain Walmart decided to finally take a stand against gun violence in America. By removing ADS for violent video games, all the while still selling guns in the exact same store. Little Billy can’t go pick up the latest Call of Duty, but that’s okay he can go two isles over and pick up a nice shotgun and have some good old American fun. That will surely put an end to those pesky games causing all the troubles (Isidore). Except for the fact that Japan is one of the largest producers and consumers of video games in the entire world. The modern video game was BIRTHED in Japan. So, tell me how their six deaths due to video games equate to our 33,000.

It’s my constitutional right to bear arms! Our founding fathers made sure to protect us, after all, the right to bear arms is how the American people gained their independence! Yes. You are correct. The second amendment does clearly state “A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed” (Second Amendment, Cornell Law School). So yes, our American forefathers did add to the constitution the right to bear arms. There are a couple of problems with this though. Ratified on December 15, 1791 (Second Amendment, Cornell Law School) the arms referenced in the Second Amendment are far, FAR more primitive than the weapons used today in just about every mass shooting in the last five or more years. According to Christopher Ingraham from The Washington Press, “the typical firearms of the day were muskets and flintlock pistols. They could hold a single round at a time, and a skilled shooter could hope to get off three or possibly four rounds in a minute.” This is what we thought of as guns back then. It could kill yes but bearing arms was mostly a statement to keep your safety. Even IF someone were to go into a busy Boston market and open fire, they would kill maybe two people tops before someone could apprehend them. By these standards, the weaponry of today, namely the AR-15, which seems to be the favored firearm of mass shootings, is a tool of destruction and war. The modern-day AR-15, in the hands of a skilled shooter “can effectively fire 45 rounds per minute. The guns are stable and accurate at distances five to 10 times father than a typical Second Amendment-era gun. Standard Magazines can hold 30 rounds, and shooters can swap out magazines and continue firing in just a matter of seconds” (Ingraham). The fundamental difference between these two weapons is astronomical. Not to mention just as with time the weapons have evolved, so has everyday living.

Two hundred years ago, the musket was about as advances as warfare had gotten. We were able to use these tools to solidify America’s independence. Often this is a reason cited by many gun owners as to why they feel the need to keep their weapons. ‘Just in case’ we need to rebel against our government again. The problem here is, now, in 2019 there is just no way a ragtag group of individuals with a few firearms could possibly fight off the might of the American army the way we fought off the British in the 1700. It’s just not feasible. It seems to be every gun nut fantasy to take their toys and take a stand against corruption and evil. The whole ‘good guy with a gun’ fallacy they like to tote out. If just ‘one good person with a gun is at the scene of a crime they can stop it’. The only problem that they don’t see is, its far too easy for them to become that person they wish to fight against. And here is the thing. Sure, a good person with a gun COULD stop a bad person with a gun, but guess what? If neither has guns then there is a 100% chance that no one will die due to massive gun violence. If they don’t have a gun to cause trouble, then you don’t need the gun to save the day.

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comicsbeat · 5 years

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Yes, it’s that time of the year where The Beat quizzes a wide swath of creators, journalists, retailers and other comics people for their upcoming projects, thoughts on the past and future of the industry, and inspirations. Huge thanks to everyone who took the time to participate, as you’ll find some very interesting takes on where we might be going below, as well as a ton of news about upcoming books. We’ll be running the survey in five parts as always, culminating in the naming of the Comics Industry Person of the Year.

Emma Vieceli, Comicker

2019 Projects: Having switched hats a bit this year, my biggest project for 2019 is a writing one: Life is Strange for Titan comics and Square Enix. I’ll of course be continuing with my co-created independent title,. Beyond that, some fun bit and bobs waiting to play out; aren’t there always? 😉

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? There have been so many sadly negative stories in 2018, from genuine losses of talented and loved people to anger, upset and fury over the fact that some people still don’t seem able to just enjoy comics and all it can encompass, but I’m going to instead focus on the fact that I personally felt an injection of enthusiasm into the industry this year. Somehow it felt that a resilience and determination was instilled, perhaps to counter some of the negative in the world, generally. I’ve seen a lot of successes and excited friends. Creators are making transitions to new mediums and fans are getting behind them. It’s not a single news story, but it’s a joy seeing the waves of unification and enthusiasm that have risen up in my internet- bubble over the last year.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? A generous billionaire shall swoop into the publishing industry and financially bolster us all. Industry-wide weekends and evenings shall be enforced and sick pay shall be introduced. The billionaire shall be loved and we’ll make a statue of them and hold an annual celebration of their greatness.

I’m pretty sure that’s what I heard, anyways.

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Spending more time with my creator-owned baby, BREAKS. this year got very busy and I lost a lot of my buffer for uploading. I’m looking forward to some self-indulgent comicking 🙂

Who inspired you in 2018? Every single person who takes the time to contact me and say they’ve enjoyed what I’ve made. That is the biggest inspiration we can hope for. But I’ll also say Andrew James of Titan Comics – he was my editor for Doctor Who a couple of years back and was willing to take a chance and offer me my first monthly writing gig with Life is Strange. His confidence in me has been hugely inspiring and helped me do something I wasn’t sure I’d ever get a chance to.

Erica Schultz, Writer/Editor

2019 projects: The trade paperback of Twelve Devils Dancing comes out the first NCBD of January with a cover by Bill Sienkiewicz. The Good Fight anthology comes out next year. I’m working on a project with Emily Pearson, another with Liana Kangas, and a third with Stelladia.

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? The passing of Stan Lee.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? Captain Marvel’s film, and how Kelly Sue, Jaime McKelvie, Dave Lopez, and Dexter Soy set that story up to be amazing.

Jimmy Palmiotti, Creator-Writer

2019 Projects: Wonder Woman for DC 100 Walmart exclusive- Sex and Violence Vol. 3- Painkiller Jane mini- series and feature film- Random Acts of Violence feature film- Coney Island graphic novel and Mystery Marvel project.

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Sadly the passing of Stan Lee, one of my heroes and a friend, and on a positive note, the release of the DC 100 page exclusive comics for Walmart.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? Creators once again separating themselves from the big companies to create their own characters mainly because the biggest companies out there do not involve the creators in the development, past comics, of characters they work on into film and TV and barely include them in a % of the license income they make off their images. This is a business that has no security for the talent as they get older, even though the biggest companies can easily help them and choose not to, and because of this, creators will be going elsewhere. An obvious and big reaction to this is we will see everything but the better selling titles take a huge hit and a ton of cancellations across the board. I also think this is the year where comics as a whole will be taking a hit unless things change really quickly.

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? More creator owned character development and spending some more time traveling and having fun with my wife.

Who inspired you in 2018? My wife, Amanda Conner, continues to inspire me each and every day to be a better person, work through my problems, and enjoy life… and not make it about work all the time. After so many years of hustling, what is important is becoming clearer because of her. I am thankful for that.

John Green, writer/artist

2019 Projects: The second book in my KITTEN CONSTRUCTION COMPANY series, “A Bridge Too Fur,” comes out in Fall from First Second Books.

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Not so much a story, but news that the world heard (and felt) both within and outside of the comics industry was the passing of Stan Lee.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? Hopefully something GOOD and not something scandalous or heartbreaking!

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Probably the next Star Wars, I guess.

Joshua Frankel, Publisher, Z2 Comics

2019 Projects: Right now Z2 Comics has 8 books or so in production for next year 5-6 of them are some of our tentpole music books. The one coming out the soonest and that has been announced is the Ghost of Ohio. The book is by Andy Biersack (lead singer of the Black Veil Brides) Scott Tuft and Eryk Donovan. It is going to tie into Andy’s same named second solo album. We’re expecting big things out of the project. Aside from that of announced books we have Run The Dungeon and D&D comedy written by Patrick Kindlon and Drawn by Goran Gliogvic. Lastly we have Tales of The Music Makers a book showcasing people the Music Maker Relief fund have helped and draw by Gary Dumm.

Some of our biggest books this year will be announcing shortly after this article runs ( and one before most likely)

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? I think the acquisition of of comic book companies by broader media companies is probably the biggest story. In a span of a year Millarworld got bought by Netflix, Valiant getting bought by DMG wholesale and now Darkhorse having a majority stake bought by a Chinese VC firm. As a broader story in the last couple of years there has been a flood of investment being poured into comics. That said despite all of this money being pushed in sales have shrunk at least in the direct market. It seems counterintuitive but investment in comics is actually not great for the market as a whole, though it does benefit the people working in the industry.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? I hate to say it but I think the sugar rush of investment money is going to start to wear off. Your going to see a lot of comic companies either downsizing or folding up shop. The Lion Forge layoffs are probably just the tip of the iceberg. Also it should be noted it looks like the economy is about to slow down and possibly contract next year. This will most likely accelerate these trends

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Probably some horrible new food that’s invented

Who inspired you in 2018? This is going to sound super pretentious but I read a book called On Grand Strategy by John Lewis Gaddis. His basic thesis is that to properly employ a grand strategy a certain cognitive dissonance is needed where one has to plan out details carefully but roll with the punches when those details change. He uses a few historical examples from Xerxes to FDR. Overall that idea has been very helpful in running Z2 in the last year.

Mark Newgarden. Cartoonist

2019 Projects: How To Re-Read Nancy What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Stan Lee dies What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Big boy pants

Brian Fies, Cartoonist

2019 Projects: “A Fire Story” graphic novel, to be published by Abrams in March 2019, expands the 18-page Emmy Award-winning webcomic I posted after my home was destroyed in the California wildfires of October 2017. The 160-page full-color hardcover tells more of my family’s story as well as the stories of others affected by the fire, while also touching on issues of class and climate change.

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Stan Lee’s death, and the reflection on where comics came from and where they’re going that it prompted.

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Whatever movies Marvel cranks out. They’re not all great, but they’ve all been entertaining.

Who inspired you in 2018? Carol Tyler always inspires me because she makes high-quality comics with outstanding heart and craftsmanship.

Peter Kuper, cartoonist

2019 Projects: Adapting Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Too few books on climate change

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? More books on climate change

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Going back to Oaxaca, Mexico

Julia Wertz, cartoonist

2019 Projects: I’m working on an autobiographical book about my last years in NYC, as well as keeping up with daily diary comics at Patreon

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Unfortunately, Cody Pickrodt’s lawsuit.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? The resolution of that lawsuit, which I hope he loses.

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? It’s not really a guilty pleasure, more just a pleasure, but I always look forward to Gabrielle Bell’s diary comics

Who inspired you in 2018? Liana Finck, who’s book Passing for Human, was released this year and was really unique and interesting, and she also continues to churn out cartoons for the New Yorker and on her instagram that somehow distill the human condition into one hilarious panel.

Sarah Glidden, cartoonist

2019 Projects: I’ve been on maternity leave for the last 7 months but he’s about to go to day care two days a week so I’m excited to get back to work.

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Cody Pickrodt suing his alleged rape victim as well as ten other cartoonists, critics and publishers who came out in support of her is one of the most despicable uses of the legal system I’ve ever seen in the comics community.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? When the 11 beat this lawsuit.

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? Paying a day care to take care of my son for a few days a week so I can work on comics, which financially makes zero sense.

Who inspired you in 2018? I could pretend its not my baby but who am I kidding? He makes me see the world differently.

Jeffrey Brown, cartoonist

2019 Projects: My new picture book, “My Teacher Is A Robot”, comes out in June

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? Stan Lee passing away. Also, side note, how old and out of touch is Bill Maher to use Lee’s death as an opportunity to declare that the comics medium has no value?!

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? Barnes & Noble will experiment with a new kind of store that expands the graphic novel section, eliminates all other categories, and focuses on comics and pop culture related merchandise. The stores will work with Diamond Distributors and they’ll also sell a large selection of both new and out of print pamphlet comics.

Joe Casey, Renaissance Man

2019 Projects: March: JESUSFREAK with Benjamin Marra (Image Comics). April: SEX Vol. 6 with Piotr Kowalski (Image Comics).

What was the biggest story in comics in 2018? I don’t know how “big” a story it was, since death is an inevitable part of life, but we lost a lot of legends this year. Steve Ditko. Harlan Ellison. Jon Schnepp. Russ Heath. Gary Friedrich. Marie Severin. Norm Breyfogle. Carlos Ezquerra. Stan Lee. And that’s just a partial list.

What will be the biggest story in comics in 2019? Hopefully something that no one could’ve possibly predicted…

Jeff Trexler, Attorney

2019 Projects: TBA

What guilty pleasure (of any kind) are you looking forward to in 2019? The 50th Annual San Diego Comic-Con – guilty pleasure because every year i say I should stay in New York to work, but …

Who inspired you in 2018? Ashley Eckstein, who not only wrote the stellar inspirational memoir It’s Your Universe but justifiably made the annual Her Universe fashion show one of — and arguably the most — buzzed about events at Comic-Con. She’s also one of the best speakers I’ve ever seen; her book tour and the talk she gave to lawyers & designers from around the world at this year’s Fashion Law Bootcamp were an exemplary blend of inspirational uplift and practical strategic advice. And there are others in the fashion community who were especially inspiring for me this year: Douriean Fletcher, Allison Cimino, Tony Kim, Jaimie Cordero … getting to catch up with and learn from people like this at comic-cons is a big reason why I go.

The Beat's Annual Creator Survey Part 1: creators speak out on the buiggest stories of 2018 and what might be coming in 2019 Yes, it's that time of the year where The Beat quizzes a wide swath of creators, journalists, retailers and other comics people for their upcoming projects, thoughts on the past and future of the industry, and inspirations.

#2018 creator survey #ashley eckstein #Brian Fies #Emma Vieceli #erica schultz #jeff trexler #Jeffrey Brown #Jimmy Palmiotti #Joe Casey #John Green #Joshua Frankel #Julia Wertz #Mark Newgarden #Peter Kuper #Sarah Glidden

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wbwest · 7 years

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New Post has been published on WilliamBruceWest.com

New Post has been published on http://www.williambrucewest.com/2017/04/12/comical-thoughts-one-our-hero-read-30-marvel-comics-one-night/

Comical Thoughts - The One Where Our Hero Read 30 Marvel Comics In One Night

So, a lot of people have thoughts on the recent remarks that Marvel Editor in Chief Axel Alonso made regarding diversity. Ultimately, he said that retailers and consumers didn’t seem to flock to the diversity push that Marvel was doing in their books. Fans came out in droves to dispute this, saying that there are other reasons that Marvel’s losing sales. Well, I’m not gonna contribute to that conversation – at least, not directly. You see, I’m about 6 months behind on Marvel books, so I’ve missed a lot of this diversity push. I mean, I go to the shop every Wednesday, and I’m buying a TON of books, but there are only so many hours in the week, so I just haven’t had the chance to read all of them. Oddly enough, I’m fairly current with a lot of the DC books I buy, mainly because they seemed to serve as better jumping-on points. I know everything happening in the Superman books and Teen Titans, but I only just read Civil War II, like, two weeks ago. Usually my Friday nights are consumed with me going on toy runs or napping, but the other day I said to myself, “Will, it’s time to read some Marvel.” I had a few thoughts on what I read, so I thought I’d share them here for anyone who’s curious.

First up, I read the full run of The Unbelievable Gwenpool to date. I read #1 when it came out, and then the book just went to the bottom of a large stack. That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy that first issue. I mean, it’s written by Christopher Hastings of the hilarious The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, so I already knew that I loved his style. The Gwenpool concept, on the surface, just sounds like a cash grab. Creating a Deadpool series used to be the equivalent of printing money (not so much anymore, looking at the sales for Deadpool and the Mercs for Money). Meanwhile, everyone and their mom seemed to love the idea of Spider-Gwen when she spun out of Spider-Verse. So, it was natural to put peanut butter in your chocolate by mixing the two.

Gwen Poole actually hails from our world, where all of the Marvel characters are just characters in comics books. By some mysterious means, she transports herself into the Marvel Universe, with her wealth of comic knowledge at her disposal. So, she knows everyone’s identities, all their power sets, etc. This is similar to the Deadpool thing where he thinks of himself as a character in a comic book. Once she gets to the MU, she sets herself up as a mercenary even though she’s not necessarily good at killing. She has limited hand to hand skills, and she’s not a great shot. But she’s pretty good at blowing shit up, which is what she does. The funny thing, though, is that they’ve never really explained why she’s a killer. Maybe it’s because she knows none of it is “real”, so it doesn’t matter if she kills somebody or not. After all, they’re just fictional characters to her. Anyway, after a botched mission, she finds herself working for M.O.D.O.K (Mental Organism Designed Only For Killing) and his gang of mercenaries, which includes Captain America foe Batroc The Leaper.

Anyway, I LOVE THIS BOOK! I’m quick to talk about things I don’t like, so I have to give equal credit to the things that I do like. I love the Gwenpool character, who’s really just a perky teenage girl who likes blowing stuff up. It’s kind of refreshing to meet a female character with an encyclopedic knowledge of comic book trivia, and it’s cool to see how she employs that in her series. I’ve been a big fan of Dr McNinja for years, so I knew Hastings wouldn’t disappoint and he surely didn’t! It’s a fun comic that really gives credence to the slang term “funnybook”. If you’re looking for fun in your comic reading, then definitely check this out. The sales on it aren’t so hot, making it seem like she should’ve been left to do cameos for a while before getting her own series. That said, she’s had 13 issues by now which, sadly, is an achievement in today’s comic landscape. Don’t let them cancel my Gwenpool! Buy this book today!

Next up, I finished the whatever volume it is for Invincible Iron Man. Ya know, the Bendis one, but the one before Civil War II. This series was kind of a waste, as it went nowhere. I’m not sure if plans got derailed because of CWII or what, but it’s odd that so many issues were devoted to one story that just dead ends. Madame Masque is caught stealing items from various Stark facilities, and when Tony goes after her, he finds she’s being chased by a group of cyber ninjas. That’s pretty much it. In the end, he never finds her and never solves that mystery. They do introduce a new cyberhacker Inhuman, though. Yay. Meanwhile, there’s a B-story of Stark trying to convince Mary Jane Watson to be his assistant/life coach. I’ve had my issues with Bendis, but I’ve got to say that this is him at his worst. Sure, there’s snappy dialogue, but not much else.

So, knowing that I needed to plod through my Iron Man backlog, I begrudgingly jumped into International Iron Man. This series made up for everything that was wrong with Invincible Iron Man. My only quibble is that, at 7 issues, it should have been an arc in Invincible Iron Man instead of its own standalone series. In the previous Iron Man series (the one after Superior Iron Man, but before the Bendis Invincible Iron Man), Tony discovered that Howard and Maria Stark were not his birth parents. In this series, Tony sets out to find his real parents, interspersed with flashbacks to the story of his first love, Cassandra, who was the daughter of arms dealers who were also business rivals of his father. Cassandra was in Tony’s life around the time that Howard died, so he finds it odd that she resurfaces, now an arms dealer herself, at the same time he’s searching for his birth parents. He thinks she knows something, but she’s not talking. In the end, Tony finds his mom, Amanda Armstrong, who’s basically Annie Lenox. No, I swear Maleev used Lenox as the model for Armstrong. The last two issues tell the story of Tony’s parents’ love affair, and it’s some damn good writing. This is Bendis at his best. I want an Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. arc of just this story (it’s good, but it’s not summer theatrical blockbuster good), but there’s no way they’d cover Stark stuff on TV. At the end, it says that the story will be continued in the next volume of Invincible Iron Man – ya know, the one starring Riri/Ironheart. So, I’m not quite sure how that’s gonna work. Is Amanda Armstrong going to be a supporting character in the book while her son spoiler alert is in a coma in S.H.I.E.L.D. custody? I haven’t read the Riri series yet (it’s in the pile), so don’t tell me what happens. Where Invincible left me disappointed, International proved to me that Bendis understands Tony Stark.

The interesting takeaway I had from the series, however, is that Tony Stark is a result of Nurture and not Nature. I mean, it was always assumed he was a genius because his father was a genius, and it was in his blood. Now that we know his real parents were just undercover S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, it becomes clear that Tony was a product of his environment and upbringing, rather than possessing some inherited genius. I’m curious to see if they’ll do anything with that going forward. Ya know, when he “wakes up”.

Ya can’t love everything, though, and that’s where America comes in. I HATED that comic. I hate the character. I don’t really know where she came from, as I wasn’t reading Young Avengers at that point, but I find her obnoxious to no end. If you’re not familiar, Miss America, AKA America Chavez, is from another dimension where she had two moms who sacrificed themselves to save creation. She has the power to punch star-shaped portals between dimensions, and she’s strong, and fast, and can fly. Basically, she can do everything but project energy. Oh, and she’s a bad ass motherfucker. She can do ALL the things, and that’s kinda why I hate her. This is about to get dicey, so strap in. Ya see, a lot of people are going to say that I don’t like her just because she’s queer. There aren’t a lot of prominent queer characters in comics, so I understand her importance to representation. That said, she’s guilty of what I call the “Queer Eye-ification of Pop Culture”.

Let’s take a trip back to 2003, shall we? Bravo introduced the reality show Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, where 5 queer men (don’t say “gay”, because a couple of them were bi) gave schlubs makeovers. Carson changed their clothes, Kyan changed their hair, Ted changed their food, Tom changed their furnishings, and Jay…well, Jay taught them how to open CDs. No, that really happed. The principal underlying theme, however, was basically “Look, queer people are better than you in every single way! They dress better, they cook better, they have better hair, and better décor. What’s wrong with you, straight people? Why do you suck so much?“ For a while, that approach kinda worked. The show was a hit. Then I think folks got tired of the formula. We got it. They were all great at shit, but they stopped being relatable. After all, they were experts, and not just regular guys.

That’s my problem with America. She’s too good. She does it all. What are her weaknesses, her faults, her fears? I didn’t get that from her. Instead, she seems to have this false bravado of being the baddest bitch on the block, and that just doesn’t appeal to me. Is that what queer readers want? Do they want a character who seems to suffer from doing-too-much-itis? Or do they want a relatable character, like a queer Peter Parker who’s an amazing hero, but still has everyday problems? As a cis, straight male, I can’t answer that. I know what I think I would want, and this ain’t it. The market will dictate whether or not I’m wrong. Instead of the whole “Queer people are the awesomest”, maybe the more realistic approach is “Queer people are just like everyone.” I know I’m veering dangerously close to the camp of folks who say things like “Well, why isn’t there a White History Month?” I’m not trying to take anything from queer identity, but the way it’s expressed here contributes to why I don’t like that character. I fear this overcompensation is a trope commonly used as a “foot in the door” technique to get some folks to accept uncomfortable ideas, but I feel it does the queer community a disservice by reinforcing stereotypes/setting up unreal expectations.

Following this thinking leads me to the new Champions comic, which is downright irresponsible in its storytelling. Back during Civil War II, the young members of the Avengers became disenchanted with the elder members because they didn’t feel the team was doing enough to really change the world, instead spending more time in-fighting in the hero community. So, they quit the team before that story even wrapped up. As Champions picks up, Ms. Marvel reaches out to Nova (Sam Alexander – gotta specify, since there are two now) and Spider-Man (Miles Morales – gotta specify since there are two now) to convince them that they should be out doing the stuff that the Avengers refuse to do. They go on a mini recruitment drive, which results in the Hulk (Amadeus Cho – gotta specify since…you get it by now), and Viv Vision joining the team.

Champions is the wrong name for this book. Honestly, it should be the New Warriors, because they are TOTAL social justice warriors. I normally don’t even dip my toe into those labeled waters, but that’s exactly what this book is about. Ms. Marvel has created a team of other teens who do nothing but seek social justice. When older Marvel fans say that they’re tired of the diversity push, I have to believe that this is the book they’re talking about.

I say they’re irresponsible because they tackle concepts that can’t be solved by punching, yet that’s exactly how they try to solve them. They went to the Middle East to stop an extremist Muslim group from killing women who were just trying to learn. They went to a small town to face off against a racist sheriff who bombed the local mosque. Instead of facing villains, all of their “foes” are systemic issues that aren’t easy fixes. Somehow, though, they manage to “fix” things in 22 pages. To use old slang, these kids are cruising for a bruising. There’s a reason the Avengers don’t handle these sorts of things, mainly because they’re old and wise enough to know there are no easy fixes. Racism ain’t Galactus. There’s nothing to punch. The only reason I would stick with the book is that there’s GOT to be a reckoning coming to teach them a lesson. The last time a team of teens was this irresponsible resulted in the destruction of the town of Stamford, Connecticut. I HAVE to believe the Champions exist only to set up some post-Secret Empire event.

The sad thing about all of this is that I like these characters. I’ve been a Miles Morales booster since day one, and I loved Sam Alexander’s Nova from the outset. I was late to the Kamala Khan party, but she’s cool, too. I don’t like how Amadeus Cho’s Hulk is painted as a green Bro in the book, but I’m really behind on his title, so maybe that’s who he is now. And I haven’t read The Visions yet, so I don’t know anything about Viv. All that said, I’d hate to see anything bad happen to any of these guys, but that seems to be the path they’re on. It just seems like such mishandling of some great concepts. From when I was reading Captain America: Sam Wilson, the big takeaway was that there are some things you can’t fight head-on, but it seems like the Champions are gonna have to learn that the hard way.

So, I guess I did have thoughts about Marvel’s diversity after all. Is it killing books? Not necessarily. It’s just not being done well. Feels tokeny. There are a lot of great female-led books right now, like the afore-mentioned Gwenpool and Jessica Jones (which I’ll talk about another time since this has already gotten way longer than I initially expected). But the minority portrayals aren’t that strong. I’ve still got a LOT more to read, though, so maybe it gets better? We’ll just have to see.

#Comical Thoughts #Comics #DC #Marvel #Music #Politics #Pop #Race #Television

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davidsilvercloud · 7 years

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The Daily Grind, 28 Nov. 2017

Terry David “Butch/Butch Naked” Silvercloud

"Step aside! I shall perform the necessary heroics" Comic Book Guy/The Simpsons

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go." - T. S. Eliot

....... The DAILY GRIND..... what's up today.

11.5 Million photo views, to date at http://ButchNaked.com. Thank you. At this time I'm getting about 100,000 photo views a week. Again... thanks for the visits. Tell everyone.

My homepage is http://ButchBoard.com

Now keep reading.

Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced an official apology, in the House of Commons, to the LGBTQ community and all those who were affected by a secret government campaign to seek out and kick out homosexuals from the government services from the 1950's to the 1990's.

I left the Navy, in 1968, because I couldn't reveal that I was gay. I was a trained submariner and a Lieutenant in the Canadian Forces. I had signed on for seven years but was offered a discharge when they found out I wasn't taking the permanent commission they had offered to me several times. They paid me the agreed upon separation payment of seven months pay and allowances and an honourable discharge, after having Military Police track me and try to frame me for being seen in areas unbecoming an officer. I told them I would see them in court. They backed off and got real nice.

I've done video of Justin Trudeau...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsCR3hutjuk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVL6g2lpUbc

Tuesday, 28 Nov., 2017. I wuz up about 7:30am. Cool, grey and wet out there and starting to get bright. I had a T3 and watched the news and wrote a bit. Went back to bed around 10:30am and slept for another couple of hours. Now it's 1:30pm.

Had a regular kind of day... painting, coffee, smoking pot, watching TV, exercise, selfies. I fucked my sex toy around 6pm and had a shower after I blew my load. Headed downtown about 6:30pm to get online.

Sorry for any typos or spelling errors. My ASUS Transformer doesn't have spell check and my near eyesight is the shits, and I'm a terrible speller. Turns out geeks can be good with numbers and ideas, but terrible spellers. I moved a lot when young... different schools, so my spelling skills suck. I've been working hard to improve them the past 30 years. My grammar is excellent... just can't spell well.

I hate being old...never did like getting older. I'm one of those people who always looked about 10-15 years younger than they are, and I tended to associate with people in their late teens or early 20's most of my life. The reality is I didn't socialize a lot... I had a boyfriend and I'm not a party and play kind of person, nor do I enjoy drinking, so bars and clubs were never something I cared for. Most people I knew were very casual acquaintances, not close friends. I was surrounded by drinkers and smokers and I don't do either. I smoke a ton of pot... about 1 1/2 oz a month.

My boyfriend died in 1994 and it's been pretty lonely since then. I've not found any way around that. I still find most adults extremely ignorant and immature, or just plain stupid... dumb as a fucking rock. So I keep to myself. I no longer have any quite young friends... they grew up and moved on, or died from sickness or accident. I've found that, since I began looking more my age... that age discrimination is rampant and I don't much fit in anywhere, now. So, here I am, in my 74th year trying to keep busy and useful and amusing. I tire more easily but expect you won't be able to keep up with me and I don't wait up. I like being in charge and the boss... get used to it, you'll be much happier when you do.

Not sure how much longer I'll keep doing the selfie thing and blogging. I take things one day at a time now.

Personal possessions are important. Owning some nice 'stuff' makes one feel more secure and provides some personal pleasures. What is important is to live within one's means and to realize that possessions will not bring happiness by themselves. That said, possessions help. I have a few things that mean a lot to me... I really enjoy looking at them and having them and would feel very empty and betrayed if I lost them. We work hard to gain what we have and should not take it for granted and we should dismiss the boneheads who say possessions don't matter as brain dead idiots.

Humans have advanced because of trade and barter. We can't make or produce everything, and we can't trade for everything, so the invention of debt and money came into being. Money and debt are related... the note is a promise to pay/receive an agreed upon value... but you never do. You just trade the piece of paper to somebody else who ads it to their promises to pay. It's a very useful and progressive idea. Like all ideas, it's prone to abuse and smart people who take advantage.

Money may not buy happiness, but it definitely makes life better. Poor totally sucks.

Money came into being a long time ago as coins. Paper money was more dependent upon the invention of the Indian number system... from India, the numbers 1, 2, 3, etc. that we know today. They were introduced to the west by the Knights Templar who discovered that number system and used it in their secret notes after the 12th century. One could deposit one's cash at a Templar temple in exchange for a note written with secret numbers (the ones we know today) then go on Crusade to Jerusalem and exchange the note for cash there... avoiding robbery on the way to the Crusade.

Trade is changing rapidly, again. Online shopping is outpacing mortar and brick stores. I mention this because shopping took a big turn in style about 100 years ago... in the late 1800's and the early 1900's. The store that made the largest impact was the department store, in London, called Selfridges. When it opened it was a TOTAL revolution in retailing. Even today there are reminders of how department stores can be successful. Selfridges catered to women's shopping... something new in those days. Women, suddenly, had in store washrooms, and the main floor and entrance to the store were totally devoted to perfumes and make-up. Walk into any large department store, today, and you will see that the formula is still being followed. Also, the idea of store displays was invented by Selfridges.... the customer could, actually, touch the merchandise. Selfridges was the first department store to pay a high enough wage that the poorer employees didn't have to room and board IN THE STORE. Yup.. employees actually slept and ate at the stores, before Selfridges.

Meanwhile, don't fret about acquiring possessions. Life is very, very short and you should attempt to enjoy it. Just remember that you don't need everything. Possessions will not take away loneliness. Old man Selfridge, after becoming immensely wealthy, lost it all to twins... the Dolly Sisters. They bled him dry with their gambling debts when he was in his 70's and lonely. He lost the store, his fortune, and died a poor man. The Selfridge Department store is still doing well and in the hands of the Weston Family of Canada.

He had it all... and lost it. When you arrive you don't get to stay. Possessions have to be protected and cared for. Life is hard.

THIS IS THE END OF THE DAILY GRIND.

IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN HERE, BEFORE, HERE IS MORE STUFF TO READ...

I'm a bit OCD and ADHD and go on like a dripping tap. Think Sheldon Cooper, if that rings some kind of bell. I quite simply assume everyone around me is a complete idiot.

http://DavidSilvercloud.com (Blog) (http://David_Silvercloud.Tumblr.com)

http://ButchNews.com (Video) (http://YouTube.com/ButchNews)

http://ButchNaked.com (Photo Stream) (http://Flickr.com/David_Silvercloud)

http://SeriousThunder.com (Art)

http://ElectronSpeed.Tumblr.com (Physics... The Speed of Light, Grand Unified Theory, Gravity, Dark Matter, Dark Energy... how the physical size of the Electron is the clock that sets the speed of light. Gravity is motion and a product of the fact that nothing ever sits still, combined with the magnetic properties of Dark Matter/Energy. Nothing can ever move in an absolute circle and rest is a relativity illusion.

Absolute rest is not possible... ever. The universe can not end. Time is change and is an illusion. It is always now, everywhere, all at once, all of the time. Proof of that is that ANY object MUST be HERE and THERE at the SAME time, no matter how large... even a Galaxy. It is always NOW on both sides... here and there, in space, of the Galaxy... all galaxies, everywhere. Waves can be either physical or electronic. The duality of the universe keeps it ongoing. DNA is the battery of life. When the chains can no longer co-operate, life ceases in the body. Life, itself, is a duality. Time measurement is a relativity convenience.) Time travel is impossible because time is not a place and nothing stays where it was. One year form now the Solar System will have moved about seven BILLION kilometres through space and will NEVER return to where it was... ever.

Earth travels through space like a long wave... it has NEVER, ever made an actual circle, nor ellipse, in space. The circle/ellipse is an illusion of relativity. Nothing can ever travel in an actual circle in space... NOTHING. Nothing can ever go backward. Backwards motion is an illusion of relativity. Time is a repercussion of change and has no fixed rate... things explode or move like a glacier. At best we can only compare rates of change. Our rate of change is called the second/minute/hour/day/month/year system.

WATCH VIDEO FOR EXPLANATION OF THE PATH OF EARTH THROUGH SPACE. Earth moves about 7 billion kilometers through space, each year... in a long wave. Earth NEVER returns to where it was before. Earth is NOT an island in space... one of the reasons why time travel is impossible. If you take a trip through space, outside the Solar System, Earth will NOT be there when you return... it will be far, far away. You will have to return to where it will BE when you arrive... remember, it's moving very, very, very fast through space in a long wave... never a circle, or ellipse.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPjohZCMwmI

http://The-Shape-Of-God.Tumbler.com Manuscript of my book... The Shape of God.

Butch, himself. Visual Artist, Photographer, Physicist (Particle, Sub/Atomic Physics/Relativity)

Inhibitions are just so inhibiting, I avoid them.

I'm a friendly, but pretty blunt, kind of guy. No time for beating around the bush. I like to say what I mean and mean what I say. I'm 73 years old. Time is not on my side. You don't have to like me. I'm a social recluse, anyway. I share my life, in photos, video, and words, to let you into my life and hope to inspire you to be a productive and useful human. I have old age issues but will continue to post, here, while I'm well and able. I talk a lot... I'm told it's part of my OCD and ADHD. Come direct at http://ButchNaked.com Sign in if you wish to see me naked.

If you don't know me, the following might help you get to know what kind of person I am. I don't expect you to understand me. I can be a bit OCD and ADHD.

"They've already got more blowjobs than we'll ever get" Steve Smith (American Dad), talking about college jocks.

"Now let us touch testicles and mate for life" Alien on The Simpsons

"It never hurts to have a second set of prints on a gun" Nelson Muntz, The Simpsons.

I'm here to teach you things. While I appreciate other people's opinions, I really don't much give a crap what anyone thinks. Until you prove your worth, I will be nice but you have to earn my respect. The moment you say a word, I'll be figuring you out really, really fast. You should assume that I don't trust anyone. I've not met a single trustworthy person in my entire life. I've met lots of nice people who aren't too bright... well-intentioned folk who know little about anything, people who are nice, most of the time until you say something that offends them. Honourable people agree to disagree.

Look up the phrase "CRITICAL THINKING" then learn to practice it. Most people leap before they look and judge before they listen to the facts. Most don't have enough knowledge, nor experience, to be experts in much of anything. You don't know what you don't know. I like to remind you of that, often.

The only other REALLY IMPORTANT thing to know about me is that I, totally, despise all religions, the teaching of religion, and religious institutions... I despise them as the evilest things on the planet. If you follow a religion, you CAN NOT BE MY FRIEND. THAT'S THAT. You are an ignorant idiot who is an ever-present danger to yourself and everyone and everything around you. Nothing, absolutely NOTHING, is eviler than religion. I don't stand for, nor sing, our National Anthem because it praises a fictitious and superstitious being called 'God'. Only a brain dead moron bonehead ignorant idiot would believe such a thing.

If you have a religion, I will not associate with you... period. You are a danger to be around. Yes, I insult religions... they are extraordinarily evil. I said it, I mean it. You have a right to be an idiot, but not around me. I have a right to defend myself against the horrors of religion and I will. Religion is evil. I can't say it enough times.

http://The-Shape-Of-God.Tumblr.com

I keep a homepage at http://ButchBoard.com

You may come directly to my photostream at http://ButchNaked.com

You must sign in to see me naked. You may download and share nude photos of me... go nuts.

GOOGLE my name (Terry David Silvercloud or David Silvercloud) for more information.

#David Silvercloud #Butch Naked #Visual Artist #Photographer #Physicist

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