#the shortest fic is like around 600 words

[zukkaoru]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @starrynightarchive and @feralshadowdemon, ty for the tag!! putting most of this under a cut since it's long lol

tagging (with no pressure): @that-was-anticlimactic @backhurtyy @rejectscanon

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

167 linked to my main ao3 account. maybe some others floating around that have been made anonymous or orphaned or something. who knows

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

965,845 - okay wow i did not realize i was that close to 1mil. huh

3. what fandoms do you write for?

well right now the bsd brainrot has taken hold of me and i cannot think of much else. but i do have a handful of zine fics for other fandoms that are in progress / will be posted eventually. i have a very long list of fandoms i have written for in the past; however, i would not recommend reading anything posted before 2021

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

plum blossom

you clutched my brain and eased my ailing

my calamitous love & insurmountable grief

five times ryan came out (and one time he couldn't)

(just wanna be) somebody i'm proud of

my disclaimer here is that these are absolutely nowhere even close to being by best fics and i kind of resent them being my top five

5. do you respond to comments

i'm trying🫠 i let like 600+ pile up in my inbox over the course of a year and a half (or more) and so i recently went through and just marked everything as read instead of actually responding. BUT (almost) all comments on fics posted since ~august 2023 will get responses. exceptions are if i literally don't know what to say bc i'm bad at talking to people sorry

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

you don't even want to know the horrors that showed up in my google docs this weekend. but also either if one of us dies or may we stay lost on our way home

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i'll go with this ultraviolet morning light just bc it's probably the greatest payoff since it takes longest to get to the happy ending

8. do you get hate on fics?

not typically but there have been a few mean comments over the years. actually i got one bookmark on a fic that's in a series for a fanweek that says "ignore the others in this series but this one is good" and honest to god it just made me laugh. like.. you do realize i can see that, right?

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

i can barely write kiss scenes

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

i don't usually BUT when i was in middle school my friend and i created The Megacrossover, which consisted of us putting a bunch of different book characters into a hunger games arena. and we just kept adding more fandoms, and having new characters be transported into the arena. it was a good time. this was also entirely handwritten as all fanfiction should be when you're 10-12 years old

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge. definitely found one fic that was like. heavily influenced by mine back in my ouat days though

12. what's the longest you've spent working on a fic? and the shortest?

longest: over a year, at least shortest: a couple hours (not including editing)

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

not technically since the megacrossover but corey and i co-come up with ideas like. at least once a week

14. what's your all-time favorite ship? from all fandoms?

outlaw queen has to be my answer to this forever and always. never forgive never forget 🏹🍎

15. what's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

too many to answer. probably the biggest one is the azula-centric sequel to tuvml that i simply do not have the attention to write bc the hyperfixations have travelled elsewhere :( there are many many others though. i have an endless amount of ideas and not enough time

16. what are your writing strengths?

people often tell me i'm good at characterization and tbh i do pride myself on knowing characters better than 97% of the rest of the fandom. not all of the characters. but most of them.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

short attention span </3

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

do whatever you want forever. but like.. respectfully

19. first fandom you wrote for?

probably percy jackson when i was like 10. no you cannot find that anywhere online because i, like an idiot, deleted it without saving a backup copy

20. favorite fic you've written?

definitely (i am) the whisper of a memory. i love a lot of my fics, but that is one i am especially proud of because i tried new things with the formatting and i think it worked really really well

[mysterynoel]

1 Like = 1 Answer (AO3 edition)

So I did one of those "1 Like = 1 Answer" posts on Twitter, and I decided I would share my answers here as well with a little more words!

1. Favorite story written? It would be a toss-up between "And Today, You" (Fire Emblem Awakening, Lucina & Child Lucina) and "Love Persevering" (Fire Emblem Three Houses, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/f!Byleth Eisner). The former because it was a piece focused on Lucina that I had been working on for 1.5-2 years. It holds such a special place in my heart. The latter because I love writing sad, angsty things and it was fun getting to return to that with a dimileth fic.

2. Most popular work? If we go by kudos, it's "Like Her Eyes" (Dimitri/f!Byleth). I wrote it for a prompt challenge and was dropping it in review exchange threads for a year because it was a fluffy one-shot that worked well fandom-blind.

3. A work you wish was more popular? I feel really bad saying this, but "And Today, You." It's actually where it should be for a gen fic posted in the Awakening fandom and I'm really grateful for that. Still, I can't help but wonder about how it would've done had I finished and posted it not long after I started it. Or five years ago. You know, sometime when the fandom was still active.

4. Favorite trope to write? "You can't sleep either, huh?" Easily my favorite thing to write! I love those quiet bonding moments at night where people may act differently than they would during the day! I've written a one-shot ("Late Night Talks" Big Hero 6, Tadashi Hamada/Honey Lemon), a chapter of a fic ("Tell Me a Story" chapter 7, Dimitri/f!Byleth), and a multi-chapter fic ("Nights Under the Azure Moon" 4 chapters, Dimitri/f!Byleth) based around this type of discussion.

5. Least favorite trope to write? Cheater's answer: smut. Thought out answer: probably horror/suspense/thriller. Not the biggest fan of reading horror outside of a few fic authors, so I have no idea where I would start with writing it.

6. Something you want to write but don't know where to start? I have two long fics in my folder ("The Boar Prince of Remire" about mercenary!Dimitri and "Will you forgive me if I can't see your light anymore" about Dimitri's five years in exile) that I would love to actually be able to outline and write instead of simply writing random scenes. Slowly chipping away at them hoping 2023 will be the year I can post first chapters.

7. Longest work written? Currently, it's "Nights Under the Azure Moon" with 12,605 words and four of five chapters posted. I think "Notice of Transfer" (FE3H & Dead Like Me, Dimitri/f!Byleth) will overtake it once I finish and post the last chapter.

8. The shortest? Shortest fic is "Time's Flow, Interrupted" (gen) at 754 words. I think I have a chapter of "Tell Me a Story" that's shorter at around 600 words.

9. Author you would like to collab with? There's a lot of authors that I think it would be fun to come up with something with, but I'm sure I would end up falling into a beta reader position since that's what I'm used to. At that point, it basically becomes a group project where one person isn't doing their share and just going along with anything that happens, and that's not fun nor fair to the other author. However, if el_pepe ever ends his indefinite hiatus, I would love to join forces for some of the Persona 3-5 story ideas we discussed if he was cool with it.

10. What tag would definitely be included in all of your works? Definitely "fluff & angst!" I love adding some angst to make the fluff sweeter! And sometimes, nothing's better than upping the amount of fluff to make the angst hit like a ton of bricks.

[huekatta]

doing this, simply bcs i can. am i a private blog i cant rly tell

1.) i have Tons of favorites. i dont think ive written anything i hate (except for that markhyuck robinhood fic? its atrocious cause theyre british). i think this one banger markren short fic i wrote, tagged nihilism.

2.) most popular is the noren time mage fic. it was mid for my taste.

3.) i rly wish the banger markren was more popular but i tagged it with '&' rather than '/' so it didnt rly reached the masses. why i tagged it with &? i was being self righteous.

4.) mcd. im so sorry but i just love it when. or maybe angst or past lovers. glances at my 3 not-happy-ending tyunning wips.

5.) meet-cute. i hate it. I HATE THAT I HAVE TO INTRODUCE THEM TO EACH OTHER. i have never met anyone Organically i think

6.) SEVERAL. uhm. mostly i think my ot5(?)/ot3(?) droid fic? i have the general gist but i think its too ambitious. so much world building and angst,, and for What

7.) theres this unrevealed yuwin crack fic around 20k. it was disgusting (written in 2019) and its abt exes (surprise!) that met again in a driving course thing (i dont have a license)

8.) probably the first fic? i used to write 600-800 and i couldnt break to 1k but lately most of my fics r 10k. anyway this question isnt abt that. my shortest was 400 iirc. nomin. oh my god it was mcd

9.) i think collabing is such a cool idea but im too territorial w writing and Very Shy. i dont think it will go well with me. unless im collabing with myself that is 4 beers deep, then i would

10.) "i can fit so many product placements in this bad boy", i love writing like this so much but then like 700 words later im probably trying my best to make u Cry

[caroldantops]

kind of wild how i went from being in such a writing rut to writing over 10,000 words of 11 monster fics in the last like month and a half

[dreadnought-dear-captain]

Happy (Slightly Belated) Birthday, Baghdad Waltz!

*CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR BAGHDAD WALTZ UP TO CHAPTER 37*

I know these are stressful times right now, but I wanted to post a little something for BW’s third birthday on 3/13/2020 (and I’m a little late because I had a lot to say). THREE!! I cannot believe it. Truly, I cannot, but here we are. I know there are still a few stragglers hanging around from when I first started posting this story (extra hearts to you all), so many people who have come and gone and sometimes return again, and so many new people joining this crazy journey all the time. 

You are all so great, and you make it possible for me to keep writing this. I probably would have quit a long time ago without your support, because this shit has been quite hard to sustain sometimes. I know I am very bad at keeping up with comments and things, and I’m so sorry.  I am terrible with social media, too. People IRL will say the same thing about me. I am super old school and still talk on the phone with my friends. I KNOW. 

(Heyyyy Bayside High)

I’ve prepared a couple of things for BW’s birthday. First, a few statistics I thought I’d whip up. Then a few questions and answers about BW, both from myself and from my beloved beta, @pitchforkcentral86​. And I’m still trucking away diligently at chapter 38! I just have a few scenes to go. 

 -- BW Statistics -- 

---------------------------------------------

Words to date: 526,011

Chapters to date: 37

Shortest chapter: 3,821 words (Prologue)

Longest chapter: 31,395 words (Chapter 33)

Number of words per chapter: 12,530 (median), 14,257 (average) (note: the median is probably a better measure, since this is such an abnormal distribution - see below for the changes in chapter length over time)

Estimated total work to date: 2,890-3,120 hours (approx 18-20 hours/week). This includes writing, rewriting, editing, research, conversations with beta, outlining, and a small portion of the brainstorming. This is a conservative estimate and only includes a fraction of the ambient thinking I do about this story. And God, I do so much processing when I sleep! Perhaps I will be a BW “expert” -- estimated at around 10,000 hours I guess? -- by the time I am done with the story and all my revisions hahahahaaaaaa D: 

Money spent to date (estimated): $600-700. This includes books on various subject matter and writing craft, video access to therapy education resources, and other educational materials. This does not include the incalculable sum in lost productivity from thinking about BW when I’m supposed to be doing other things!

Most of you probably don’t know this, but @pitchforkcentral86​ is not just a beta reader. She is my partner in crime with BW. She knows my characters as well as I do, sometimes better. She helps me troubleshoot scenes, she tells me when my writing sucks, when my I’m not being true to my characters, when I’m not being real enough (sometimes when I’m being TOO real). She gives me porn inspiration and listens to me bitch and calls my bullshit and makes this story what it is. I really mean it - this story would not be nearly as good without her, and you can see how much better it gets once she starts to get involved around chapter 17. 

So I decided I would answer some silly little questions about BW. Just my own personal opinions about stuff! And asked @pitchforkcentral86​ to contribute as well. See below. 

What are my favorite scenes in BW and why? 

In no particular order: 

The 9/11 memory (Chapter 26): When Steve is in therapy with Hope remembering when Bucky returns from Ground Zero. This was one of the first times I experimented with writing in a sort of stream-of-consciousness way (though certainly not the last!). I have done several tweaks to it since the original version, texturing it more. It’s so rich in detail, visceral detail, little details about their relationship, pieces of Bucky’s past, clues about his alcoholism, the way he handles stress, his difficulties letting Steve in, the love Steve has for him, Bucky’s need to be loved and cared for and his aversion for it, it’s so, so rich. Gah. I love it. (GUH and @buckydunpun​’s ART - just murder me. Thanks.)

The Thor “breakup” scene (Chapter 28): This is the moment I think that many people realized Bucky is not a reliable narrator. Maybe they suspected it before, but this is when it’s very obviously apparent. His entire interpretation of his relationship with Thor is thrown into question. He built a rich fantasy about what they were, holding hands in the grass, all this bullshit, and he could actually say they were boyfriends, which makes complete sense because there were never any stakes. It was always surface. There was never any intimacy except as veteran/soldier friends who had sex, which is about as deep as Bucky can go anyway without getting utterly terrified. 

This is in such stark contrast to Steve, where there is actual intimacy, ongoing demand for more intimacy, and this relationship feels VERY real to Bucky, and it’s very frightening to him. And that’s why he runs from the term “boyfriend” with Steve. It’s all so real. It’s easy to engage with a fake boyfriend. But still, he didn’t deliberately realize he was doing this, so it was devastating to find out the truth of his own self-deception. And to hear that he’s not the kind of guy you settle with, he’s the guy you fuck… wow. But how can you really hate Thor? (I’m sure some of you can but…) He’s a nice guy. Even Bucky knows it. So he’s run from something good and real (Steve) to something good but false (Thor) and then he gets rejected from both. It’s horrible and so self-defeating and so quintessentially Bucky. I love it. 

A Close Second (Spent Brass fic): This whole side fic came together like a glorious dream. I love everything about it. It’s such a wonderful look into their relationship, into their dynamics, into their individual personalities, their idiosyncrasies, so much push-pull between them. Whispers of things that have happened to Bucky in the past, a lack of understanding from Steve, a desire to know, so much affection. Some good sex. I love this SB. But I love all the Spent Brass fics. They are so close to my heart. 

Honorable mention: Bucky’s masturbation scene during his bender (Chapter 32). I had an absolute BLAST writing this. Thanks to @pitchforkcentral86​ for proposing that Bucky’s core sexual/romantic desire is just to be kissed. Dayum. It all unfolded from there. 

Who is the character I think about the most? Bucky. I think because he’s got the most complex history and the most complicated psychology. He’s actually fairly rule-bound in terms of how he operates, but he’s got a lot of back story that explains how he became the way he is, and I spend a lot of time considering what happened to him and how he developed his self-image, his coping strategies, and his ideas about others and the world. I think a lot about his relationship with his parents. I think a LOT about bby Jamie. It’s not because Steve is not important or any less complex. But Bucky’s childhood experiences have shaped him in very specific ways, and I want to make sure that I represent them very thoughtfully. 

Who is my favorite character to write? Bucky. His voice and thought processes come to me more easily than Steve’s. Perhaps in part because of my personal penchant for the word “fuck.” I love writing his perspective, his preferences, his interpretations of situations. I love imagining the way he imagines the world. 

Who is my favorite supporting character? Winnie. I know she’s a very polarizing character, but I have so much affection for her. I think she’s a badass. She joined the military as a female officer back in the 1970s, which is incredible and rough. She kept her maiden name. This is a Southern conservative woman, an Air Force brat, raised by very conservative Southern people in a very conservative Pentecostal church, but she has always had an irrepressible rebellious, feminist badass streak in her even before she knew what feminism was. She might not even define herself as a feminist now. She has always done the best she can under very difficult circumstances, and she loves her kids, even though she sometimes sucks quite badly at mothering them. I love her for her imperfections. 

Favorite topic to research this year: I’ve been really enjoying researching emotionally focused couples therapy, which was developed by Sue Johnson, EdD. I’ve been watching therapy videos of couples going through this and having a wonderful time imaging Bucky and Steve going through something similar with Claire. I don’t think Claire is the strictest adherent to EFT, but I think she’s informed by it. It’s tough, because I’m very used to cognitive behavioral type therapies, so this one has been different to think about writing. I’ve also been really getting into reading about childhood sexual abuse and its effects on boys and men. It’s greatly helped my conceptualization of Bucky and Bucky and Steve’s relationship. I mean, it’s a grim topic, but there have been some fascinating threads in terms of understanding one’s self perception of sexual orientation, etc. and thinking about how Bucky would consider and contextualize his experiences. 

Am I more of a Steve or a Bucky? Hmm. I don’t strongly relate to either, but I think if I had to choose, I’m a bit more of a Steve. I’m pretty expressive of my affection and positive emotions, and I’ll complain about daily life things enough. However, when it comes to major life events that really bother me, I tend to err on the side of not processing them and turning my feelings into headaches and other physical afflictions. In other words, I’m a suppressor of major emotions and events. It’s FINE. I’m FINE. Nothing to see here. But I am definitely not as tidy as Steve, nor as smart, and definitely not as buff or hot. So that’s where most of our similarities end lol. I do eat a lot of tofu though. 

Who would I want to hang out with for a day? I initially thought Rikki, but like @pitchforkcentral86​, think she’s actually too cool and smart for me, and I would probably just make an ass out of myself. I think probably Elektra. I know, this is a left field answer, but it’s one day! To do whatever with anyone! I want to choose someone who’s going to make it worth my while. So many of the characters are either too busy, too rigid, too anxious, too conventional, etc. I would want to run around NYC with Elektra for the day and have drinks with her and Matt afterwards at some weird-ass underground bar. My more infield answer would probably be Hank. I want him to tell me gay stories about gay things. I want to see his apartment. I want to drink coffee with him. I want him to tell me about what the AIDS crisis was like for him. I want to hear about his relationship with Howard. I want all the shit that Bucky takes for granted every day. He can be my fairy godmother any day. 

Who would I want to be friends with? Probably Sharon. She’s one of the most reliable, loyal, and level-headed people in this world. She’s smart, she’s flexible, she rolls with things pretty well but also doesn’t take a ton of bullshit. She also has a good sense of humor about things. I feel like she’s someone I could call with my Zack Morris phone and talk with for hours about all sorts of things. We could also split a bottle of wine and talk some real shit. 

Wait - Why not Bucky or Steve? I don’t think these two are entirely likable, to be honest. They’re good humans, they mean well, but I don’t think they’re very well equipped in the friendship department.  I care about them very deeply (I hope that’s clear), but I don’t know if I’d want to be particularly close to either of them at this point in their lives. They’re both lacking in the skill and perspective to be good friends and partners, which is a major reason why they are in therapy. 

Who would I want to be my therapist - Hope, Bruce, Scott, or Claire? Claire. Given how much I suck at talking about the things that are really deeply bothering me, I think I would need an emotionally focused therapist who is going to dig in there and really get me to focus on all the emotions I’m trying to shove away. I would probably try to over-intellectualize everything and deflect, and I don’t think she’d let me get away with that. 

Okay, on to @pitchforkcentral86​~~~~~

What are my favorite scenes in BW and why? 

Oh boy. Well, this is a difficult question to answer since it feels like every chapter becomes a new favorite simply due to sheer amount of time spent planning and composing and revising and whining and complaining. And also my memory sucks. BUT, with that said, I think I would like to mention three scenes specifically:

1)      Bucky on deployment, cleaning a Humvee (Chapter 7), Steve standing nearby. This scene conveyed the tension of deployment and between Steve and Bucky so well, and, perhaps more importantly, built my respect towards Bucky as a competent, caring NCO (to that effect, the small scene in which we see Bucky the NCO on film telling all the little grunts to eat so they can become big and strong is another favorite).

2)      Beautiful Boy (Spent Brass), Steve’s memory from childhood with Sarah at the park, naming animals. I really don’t have a good reason other than that scene was so clear to me in my mind and was especially tender.

3)      Steve sleeping with Sharon in DC (Chapter 33). Honestly, it was just a great scene, and we had a really good time planning it out.

I can include many more, and certainly the ones Dread mentioned are favorites too, but I have to stop or this will just be a squeee fest.

Who is my favorite supporting character?

 Hank. His particular brand of honesty is extremely appealing to me, and I think Bucky secretly, or not so secretly, loves him too. And also Quill, just for shits and giggles because he is reliably there as an ice breaker, that lovable Mountain-Dew-drinking goof.  

Favorite topic to research this year: 

Well, I don’t do the research myself, but I spend many, many m-a-n-y hours listening to and conversing with Dread about all the things he’s delved into for this fic. So I guess maybe I’ll turn this question into favorite topic to discuss/conceptualize. In that respect, Bucky’s and Jack’s relationship has been by far the most intriguing, grueling, fascinating and difficult aspect of this fic to conceptualize – those were some of the best talks in the process. [Dreadnought edit: You will see much more of this in future chapters, folks!] And for a fun answer, planning out sex scenes is hilarious.

Am I more of a Steve or Bucky?

Bucky, no doubt. Sometimes it feels like Dread has climbed into my brain, found a horrible nugget of truth about me, and then put it into words coming out of Bucky’s mouth. Those moments are both wonderful and terrible in equal measure.

Who would I want to hang out with for a day?

For a whole day? Can it maybe be a coffee or, like, a quick lunch? I honestly don’t know… Neither Steve nor Bucky will be very good company, I think. Not in their current versions, anyways. Rikki is hella cool but she intimidates me, so, not her. Um.. Huh. Nope, don’t have an answer.

Who would I want to be friends with?

Probably Hank, again. He has a really good attitude. I’m starting to feel like not picking Steve/Bucky is selfish because it’s like “oh, they have too many issues and it won’t be fun”. But it’s also true! Friendship is reciprocal, and I really don’t think that’s where they’re at. (But I would have totally been dying to be friends with Steve in his bookshop days). 

Who would I want to be my therapist - Hope, Bruce, Scott, or Claire?

Hope or Claire. Both are no-nonsense competent therapists. But I think maybe Hope will be too put-together for me. So, yeah, probably Claire. 

-----------------------------

Okay, everyone. Back to the grind. I’ll update as soon as I can!  Remember to wash your hands with the fastidiousness of BW Steve Rogers. (And also remember to sing the “happy birthday fucking everyone” song, which should actually be sung TWICE or resentfully enough that it lasts 20 seconds.)

[youhearstatic]

Tagged by the very kind and lovely @charmandhex

Ao3 name: capitalnineteen

Fandoms: TAZ Balance and a couple of tiny Elementary fics

Number of fics: If I count unpublished and WIPs and short tumblr pieces... I lost count at 130... but that does include a lot of shorts. For the rest of these I’ll just count my AO3 pieces.

1. Fic you spent the most time on: It’s About Time. That fic is finished but if you count it as the series, it’s still in progress and I started in about January of 2018.

2. Fic you spent the least time on: A History of Kisses which was based on the five kisses speech from Princess Bride.

3. Longest fic: It’s About Time, 148k

4. Shortest fic: One of my Elementary fics had like 600 words. It was me dipping my toes into fanfic. Also, at that point I hadn’t written anything more than around 1k in ages.

5. Most hits: you’re about to see a trend but It’s About Time

6. Most kudos: It’s About Time which was posted weekly for a year.

7. Most comment threads: It’s About Time which makes sense with 50 chapters.

8. Fave fic you wrote: Losing Time is always going to hold a special place in my heart. It was the first thing I shared. It was written in a headlong rush and I had no idea what was going to happen when I started. I think it turned out pretty good.

9. Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: I’ve thought a lot about redoing A Thousand Tiny Moments which was the same story as It’s About Time but from Lup’s perspective. It was written fast and posted faster for Blupjeans week. (And boy did I agonize about it.) At that point I had a lot of the broad strokes of It’s About Time done but none of the finer details from the century. It’d be interesting to see her perspective during several things that were added over the course of Barry’s POV.

10. Share a bit of your WIP or share a story idea that you’re planning: This is from a WIP I’ve picked up off and on over the years. It’s not exactly fun. It’s essentially a character study with a heavy dose of whump. 

“Barry, it’s okay,” Lup says, her voice soft. “I’m going to turn the lights on, babe, okay?”

He doesn’t respond. She gives him another moment then turns on every light the lab has, banishing all the shadows in the room except the ones living on his face. The bruises and the haunted look in his eyes are stark in the harsh light.

He relaxes minutely, looks up from beneath the arms he has tented over his head. Looking at him, she remembers a caravan she and Taako traveled with briefly. There were a few show animals - big cats; a tiger, a panther, and a cougar - that had been little more than skin and bones. They’d all had the same look Barry does now. As if they saw through the world and only awaited death. She and Taako had left that caravan pretty quickly after seeing them. She’d wanted to set them free before taking off but Taako had pointed out the animals were no longer in any shape to take care of themselves, might in fact hurt the two of them or others. That’s what she sees on the face of the love of her life. Barry Bluejeans is hiding in the corner of the science lab - the place where he should feel safest - looking like a trapped and wounded animal, staring through his surroundings as if they only temporarily contain him.

Other WIP things I really want to do: obviously finish Time After Time and Chrysanthemums, continue the Dragon!Barry AU, another project with @jortsman, what I call the wereBarry AU, and ACoTaR AU. I wish I had more collabs because that’s much easier for me to get words down for. 

Want to do this? Consider yourself tagged! (Though I am gonna particularly mention @jortsman.)

[alphaflyer]

Meme (with corrections)

I was tagged by the lovely @cloud--atlas.  And so I copied her piece, with the intention of inserting my own answers.  But there were a couple of places I overlooked, leaving her answers in place...  OOPS.  I fixed one before people read the post but didn’t notice another, so I just decided to delete the original and repost the corrected version.  APOLOGIES!!

AO3 name: AlphaFlyer

Fandoms:

The Avengers (Marvel Movies) (59)

Marvel Cinematic Universe (49)

Star Trek: Voyager (30)

Hawkeye (Comics) (10)

The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types (8)

Captain America (Movies) (7)

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV) (5)

James Bond (Craig movies) (4)

Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies) (3)

Thor (Movies) (2)

Black Widow (Comics) (1)

Ant-Man (Movies) (1)

Avengers (Comics) (1)

Note that most of these (like James Bond, Agents of SHIELD) tend to be crossovers with MCU.

Number of fics published:

AO3 tells me it’s 101, but “Moments” has like 32 distinct fic in it, so it’s more like 132.

Fic I spent the most time on:

Do long periods of inactivity allowing it to simmer in your subconscious count?  That would be my two-season MarvelBang, “Seventh Crow”, which I started in the spring of 2015 and finished in the fall of 2016, mostly because of an intervening transatlantic move and family issues, resulting in resolute inability to write.  Until my friend Inkvoices made me a fanvid, based on what she knew about the story, and sent it to me for Christmas.  

Fic I spent the least time on:

That would be a tie between Savile Row and Five Times SHIELD Tried to Recruit Clint Barton. The first I cranked out over an evening, based on a tag game on LJ; the latter I wrote longhand in a boat while my husband and daughter were fishing, and then typed out/edited it in the evening.

Longest fic:

The top 5 spots are all taken up by Star Trek:Voyager fic, with #1 going to Off the Shoulder of Orion with a word count of 78,804.  That was around the time when I started posting chapters before having finished a story, a gamble that ended up backfiring when I ran out of steam on “Proof of Life” (FFN only, so I won’t link to it here.)

Shortest fic:

Among the fic posted on their own, rather than in my Moments collection, that’s a tie between 3 Five-Plus-One fics, in all of which the individual segments are drabble length at 100 words each. The only difference between the three is the length of the author’s note, otherwise they’re exactly 600 words apiece.

Most hits:

Second Mouse, with 38,678 hits (unless you include FFN, where Skies Over Manhattan comes in at 49,169 - but that site counts individual chapter hits.  “Skies” is second on AO3 with 23,579).

Most kudos:

Skies Over Manhattan, with 899.  (Yo, Folks, can we get that to 900 plsntx.. :P)

Most comment threads:

Moments, at 253  (This is my 32-chapter ficlet collection, so people tend to comment on each chapter as it comes out).  For a single story that came out all at once, it’s that energizer bunny MarvelBang, Second Mouse, with 103.  

Most bookmarks:

Runaway winner is Skies Over Manhattan, with 330.  Followed by Second Mouse with 208.  Five Times SHIELD Tried to Recruit Clint Barton, In The Service and Double Deuce are in a virtual tie for third with 137, 136 and 135.

Total word count:

According to AO3, 980,381.  Whoops.  Seriously???

Favourite fic I wrote:

Oh, man. I hate that question.  I'm really pleased with how Second Mouse turned out - nothing but good memories from my collaboration with Inkvoices who illustrated it; also pleased with the sequels and the reception it got from readers.  And @hawksandspiders just did a detailed analysis of it on her DW account, which was totally thrilling and made me even prouder of it.

Another little one I’m quite fond of is my Voyager piece “Grace”, because of the rhythm and cadence I used to convey the sense of urgency in the story (a lot fewer people read it...).

Fic you want to rewrite/expand on:

Whoops - so an earlier version of this post left in a clip from @cloud--atlas‘ original post that I cut and pasted...  No, I did NOT write “Red Star” although it’s one of the few threesome fics I genuinely like!  Here’s my answer:

“Choices”.  My very first fanfic ever. First ever attempt at writing, in fact.  It’s a post-ST Voyager Endgame thing, detailing what happens to the crew (specifically Tom Paris but others as well) when they come home.  It still holds up content-wise, but the dialogue is clunky in parts and the paragraphing atrocious.  I haven’t had the guts to go back in and fix it, because it is my Firstborn and we need to own our mistakes and show how we’ve grown as writers somehow (also it’s in the top-5 Voyager stories on FFN in terms of “favourite” pings as it is, so it should probably be allowed to stand on its own). But whenever I look at it, I cringe a little at how much better it could be.

Share a bit of a WIP or a story idea you’re planning on:

Three words:  Clint and Flerken.  I keep rewriting that one though, so I’m not sure when it will see the light of day...

Also waiting for my @be-compromised “Remix” assignment!

[chainofclovers]

Modern Love (Grace/Frankie) - 8. Thresholds and Cheese

We’ve come to the end of the 300-word noun prompt fics! This last one is for my dear @bristler, who prompted cheese, and I figure if I’m gonna write cheese-oriented fanfiction for my literal wife I might as well also write about own of my own favorite nouns. So here’s “Thresholds and Cheese,” coming in at 600 words. What can I say; I’m undisciplined, I love thresholds even though they’re terrifying, and cheese is delicious.

Along with the last chapter (which does earn an M rating) I’m reposting the other stories here behind the cut, with recipient tags in case y’all would like to check out the finished product. Thank you all for your prompts; this was so fun to write.

This way for Pickle, Thistle, Crumpet, Tea, Ephemera, Trestle, Baby, Thresholds, and Cheese, starring Grace and Frankie!

1. Pickle, for @telanu

“If you have to abandon our home to be somebody else’s wife, you can at least support my amateur fermentation efforts.”

Whenever Grace isn’t waiting impatiently for Frankie to catch up, she’s a hundred miles behind. She should know better than to get distracted while Frankie talks about her hobbies. “‘Somebody else’s’—?” The wind off the ocean isn’t as loud as it was the morning she told Frankie about her marriage, but her voice still fades against the waves. They’re only a few steps down the beach from the house; sometimes, just for a few seconds, she tricks herself into believing she still lives here. “‘Fermentation’—?”

“Pickles, Grace. Cukes. Radishes. Watermelon rinds. As I was saying, I need a side project to take my mind off the debilitating loneliness—plus you can’t boss me around the kitchen anymore.” Grace hears her perfectly well. Frankie hasn’t always been so flippant about Grace’s obligations, but the marriage is already three weeks old.

Although Grace obliges Frankie over the days that follow their latest beach walk, there isn’t much to support: just a cluster of jars in the fridge. She’s an observer, not a sous chef. She admires the progress every time she comes over—some of the recipes take only a few days, but even in that short time she catches a variety of nearly imperceptible stages. “Wow, it’s just like you see at the grocery!” she says, pointing at the dill seeds floating in one of the newest jars.

“I may be an amateur, but I’m no schlub.”

Grace smiles. “No. You aren’t.”

“Oh, God. Do you even like pickles?”

“Um. Yeah, sure. I mean, I’ve spent virtually no time thinking about them.”

“Until now?”

“Until now.”

There’s something fitting about Frankie’s experiment: a long wait, a slow transformation, miniature oceans of brine.

2. Thistle, for @ellydash

“It’s just a day trip,” Grace says when Nick insinuates he wishes she wouldn’t go. “She’s lonely,” she adds, hating herself for telling only half the story, getting what she wants by teaming up with Nick. He delights in being her partner-in-schemes, but Grace is embarrassed whenever they tackle Frankie—her tremors, whims, navigable needs—like backseat drivers or inside-jokers.

But it works, and now she has a whole day with Frankie, and it isn’t normal, this isn’t a normal response to a day—despite not having a hard and fast ETA for their return to San Diego tonight, Grace keeps counting the probable number of hours left. She drives very close to the speed limit on their way to Cuyamaca Rancho State Park, as if avoiding high and low speeds will create a kind of stasis which might neutralize time. Frankie stirs restlessly in the passenger seat, humming a tune just out of the range of recognition.

When they arrive, it doesn’t take long to realize even the shortest hiking trail is too much for Grace’s knees. Frankie won’t entertain any attempt at apology. “Stop it,” she says. “It’s fine. We’ll wander around close to the Visitor Center, and picnic at the tables by the stream when we’re ready.”

The park is full of late season blooms: goldenrod, prairie-fire, cobweb thistle. The flowers streak together in Grace’s vision, burn cool like a migraine behind her eyes even though their colors are warm. After so often standing with Frankie at the edge of the entire Pacific, there’s something tender about the creeks—their visible edges, comprehensible scale, willingness to rest against the land and cooperate with flowers.

“I like thistles,” Frankie says. “They’re prickly so predators don’t eat them.” She glances at Grace, and the hair stands up on the back of Grace’s neck.

3. Crumpet, for @amk-1992 

It was Frankie’s responsibility to pack the picnic. Grace sits across from her at their picnic table not far from the Visitor Center, no idea what will come out of Frankie’s backpack. Because she wasn’t there when Frankie packed it. Because she pulled up to the house this morning and Frankie was already standing in the driveway, ready to go.

“There’s no booze in here,” Frankie says. “I’ll tell you that right up front. Hashtag sorrynotsorry.”

Shame, a slimy wet slug of it, streaks through Grace, doesn’t evaporate right away even after the chill is gone. “Didn’t expect any,” she says. There’s a difference between expectation and hope.

“I did, however, bring these crumpets I got at Trader Joe’s. Seemed kinda classy for a day trip.” Frankie wiggles her chin and shimmies her shoulders a little, as if to simultaneously mock and participate in sophistication.

“I think you’re supposed to toast those,” Grace says, a revenge for hashtag sorrynotsorry she immediately regrets. Grace doesn’t know what the f— to do with a crumpet. She only said something because she can read the heating instructions on the package.

Frankie seems flustered by the feedback. Frankie, who didn’t bat an eye at Grace’s keys in the birthday cake, who squatted her even after years of insults. “Well,” she says, rummaging for the next item. “We’ve also got the house-made pickle tray. Except—except this is a state park—and this is the pickle—Tupperware container—”

“Oh. Frankie. Don’t cry.” Grace regrets that too, because Frankie was the one who taught her not to shut someone down with a don’t crywhen you could validate their emotional state with a let it all out.

Grace eats a lot of pickles, eats more than Frankie does, compliments every variety, goes back for more and more and more.

4. Tea, for @themirrorofink

It was exciting to rush back to the car when the skies opened over Cuyamaca Rancho, but after an hour driving with reduced visibility, Grace is mostly aware of her tense posture and still-sopping clothes.

When Grace pulls up to the house, Frankie says, “It’ll take you at least thirty minutes to get back to Nick’s in this mess. You can come up and change.”

Frankie has never explained why Grace is welcome in the house some days and not others, why she waited outside this morning but sometimes wants Grace to come inside to look at pickle jars and sit in the kitchen drinking coffee. Inside, it doesn’t feel possible to go up to her old bedroom and choose from the clothes they both know are still there. (“You can’t come and go all the time,” Frankie said the week Grace moved out. “Think of this as a storage unit, not a second house.”) Frankie sets her backpack on the counter. “I’ll grab you something while I’m changing,” she says. “I’ll be right back.”

Grace puts the teakettle on, pulls the crumpets from the backpack and tosses a few in the toaster, busies herself pulling butter and cherry preserves from the fridge, knives from the drawer.

“Oh,” Frankie says softly when she comes back and sees the impromptu tea in motion. She stands next to Grace and hands her a t-shirt and sweater from her own closet, nothing particularly flamboyant about her selection.

Grace points to another room with her chin. “Should I—?”

But Frankie reaches out, touches Grace’s wet sleeve, flashes an almost unreadable smile. Grace’s heart pounds. She and Frankie hold hands, fight, hold each other, follow each other around, but their intimacy has never included undressing.

The kettle whistles and they startle, propelled into busyness again.

5. Ephemera, for @ephemeral-winter

Grace stirs with the early sun, registers the sound of the shower running, and in that moment when wakefulness takes over for sleep, her brain reaches to collect yesterday’s details so they don’t scatter, to have them under the covers with her, to be alone with them while she can.

If it hadn’t rained, they’d have stayed out longer, timed their return so they could stop for dinner on the way home. Instead, she made it back to Nick’s by dinnertime, not hungry anymore. In the elevator to the penthouse, she’d pulled Frankie’s sweater closer to her body, breathing it in with the knowledge she’d wear it for another ten minutes tops. Before that, she and Frankie had sat with strong black tea and toasted crumpets dripping with butter and preserves, such a contrast to the pickles, though those were surprisingly competent for a first effort. Before that—after Grace silenced the kettle but before they sat down for tea—they’d stood together in the storm-darkened kitchen, and Grace took off her wet blouse, aware of Frankie looking at her, and Frankie handed her a clean kitchen towel but didn’t quite let go, asked if it was okay to help her dry off. Then Frankie pulled the impossibly soft t-shirt over Grace’s head, guided her arms through the sleeves with a reverence not usually afforded an old friend, nor an old shirt with “The Kinks” on the front, a souvenir Frankie managed to keep forever.

Grace misses the shirt against her skin, wants it under the covers with her. She reaches for her phone. Frankie’s sent a 2 a.m. text, more ephemera-turned-forever, this time by the internet: thank you for our day

I don’t want to give your clothes back, Grace writes, and imagines Frankie waking up to the words.

6. Trestle, for @farmerdamsel

Grace always liked the morning after moment in the movies, when the woman has slept with the man for the first time and puts on his discarded dress shirt and wears it at breakfast like a badge of pride. Like she’s the first person to think of doing such a thing. You got me, the shirt seems to help her say, but I’ve got you, too.

She tried it once, the morning after one of the earliest nights Robert stayed over at her first San Diego apartment. The night before, he’d laid his shirt on her vanity table, and she looked at herself in the mirror as she buttoned it, tried to think happily about Robert taking a shower not ten feet away. The pale blue shirt smelled like his cologne, and more faintly of sweat. In it she looked like a kid dressing up as a businessman. She took off the shirt in a hurry, scrambled to put her pajamas on and start coffee in the kitchenette before Robert could emerge and suggest going out for omelettes.

Unlike the rest of the penthouse, Nick’s guest room has an south-facing window. Grace stands in front of it wearing Frankie’s Kinks shirt, looking out from a new angle at the night-carved lightlines of her most familiar city. Her throat is drought dry after so many apologies, her brain full of the feeling of leaving in the morning. Nick knows. Frankie knows. Grace keeps taking handfuls of the shirt in her hand, then smoothing the cotton against her torso again. Tomorrow she’ll board a train that will take her up the coast for two days, and down again not long after that, the engine the only thing moving her forward, the tracks and trestles doing all the work to hold her up.

7. Baby, for @nicoljean

On the train Grace has only one job, which is to let her thoughts run free. To find out what she thinks about when she’s alone by choice for the first time.

She’s never felt safer than she does on the train, peering out her window at the glittering ocean. Getting married was supposed to be safe—the abundant safety of ending each day with someone. But she spent the marriage fighting for scraps of time with Frankie. In marrying Nick she’d done what she always does: create unnecessary scarcity. She’s finished with that now. Alone, then not-alone.

Frankie offered to take her to the station, but Grace insisted on the aloneness of a cab. “Wait up for me when I come home, please?” she asked. When she takes the same route in reverse, five days from now, the train will return to San Diego in the middle of the night. She’ll take a cab then, too, wide awake on the drive back to La Jolla, will see Frankie for the first time since they decided—

When her thoughts run free, she mostly thinks about Frankie.

Grace’s phone buzzes. Frankie’s texted.

Ba

    by

Frankie texts again shortly after:

Oh god was practicing typing you sexy things for when you return an honest woman, tried deleting but got into a little return situation then a spacing situation and then a sending accidentally situation

“Young lady,” says the middle-aged man across the aisle. Grace has avoided him since he got on board. “Young lady,” he says again. F—ing hell, he’s talking to her. “There’s only one thing that could make a woman smile like that, and that’s a gentleman.”

“Oh my God,” Grace says, and it hits her: she doesn’t have to say anything else. She turns back to the window, still smiling.

8. Thresholds and Cheese, for @bristler (and me)

Grace returns in the middle of the night, crosses from train to cab to house. The house envelops her, Frankie envelops her, Frankie kisses her, Frankie gives her food and a nightcap, Frankie lays out a towel and pajamas while Grace washes away the invisible grime of travel. Frankie waits in Grace’s bed.

Grace wasn’t sure if it would happen so soon, sex, but they both want it, and when it happens in the still-middle of that long night it doesn’t feel soon. This is her reentry, the moment she kept imagining from the otherworldliness of the train, her homecoming—and Frankie enters her again and again, each motion returning her to her home, coming in Frankie’s arms, and then inside Frankie, because she comes again when she feels Frankie come around her fingers. Pulse, heartbeat, drumbeat; arrival and arrival and arrival.

When it’s over, part of her worries they have to talk about her mistake now. Again. But Frankie kisses her forehead, says “I’m so glad you’re home,” and then the room is dark.

The next day is thick with sleepiness. By early evening they’re on the couch together. Frankie wears a t-shirt, no bra, no long sleeves, a compliment for Grace, and Grace touches her, and it makes Frankie shove a hand up her own shirt, their fingers meeting through the thin fabric. Grace feels a sob roll through her. If she exhales, she’ll start to cry—long night, long day, home after absence, those strengths and weaknesses. It’s inevitable, breathing, and the tears come. “Baby,” Frankie says, in real three-dimensional life this time. “It’s okay. Let it out.”

They’ve just gotten rid of Frankie’s shirt altogether when a key turns in the lock and the front door opens. “Hey, Frankie!” Brianna yells.

“Oh, shit,” Frankie mutters. She wraps a blanket from the back of the couch around herself. If the goal is to make oneself technically decent, the blanket does the trick. If the goal is to imply a fully-clothed person lounges beneath it, the blanket is insufficient.

“I know I didn’t text, but I do wanna say hi to mom, wherever she is, and Thursday’s Thursday, right? I got brie! And a sheep’s milk Cabrales thing.”

“Baaaaaa,” Frankie bleats.

“Just gonna grab some of those pickles and I’ll be right in!”

“I think I’m double-booked,” Frankie says mildly.

“Seems like it,” says Grace, voice warbly and awful.

Brianna stops short when she enters the room, arms full of Grace’s favorite cutting board, a pickle jar, knives, blocks of cheese, a box of Triscuits. “Mom. You’re here. You’re crying. And there’s a ninety percent chance Frankie’s shirtless, considering the shirt on the floor and the weirdness with the blanket. And I’m—I’m narrating. Is this really happening?”

Frankie turns to Grace. “This is Get High and Eat Cheese Night, a Thursday ritual. Kinda like how we’re just starting Touch Boobs and Cry Night. Except I completely spaced it, and for this week only, these very distinct events are experiencing some unfortunate overlap.”

“I can leave,” Brianna says, “very quickly. Except I really, really want some of your pot, Frankie, and I haven’t seen Mom in about a thousand years.”

She isn’t surprised, Grace realizes. Because she already knows. She’s embarrassed, but unshocked, and only embarrassed on the surface, because she marched in with cheese, focused on her own tradition.

“Just leave for two minutes,” Grace says. “For the sake of Frankie’s shirt. I’ll go with you.”

Grace looks back at Frankie as she follows Brianna the kitchen. They grin at each other, like even two minutes will be too long.

[distractionpie]

2 8 10 14 for the end of year fanfic game!

1. least favorite fic you wrote this year

An Evening to Rememberwas an informative experience as a writer but I’m not pleased with it as an endresult. I liked the dynamic between Amaya and Gren and wanted more of them so Icame up with the concept but when I started writing it I quickly began to realisethat although I’d read some shipping fic of them that I enjoyed that was more fondnessfor the characters and the quality of the writing than because I shipped it. SoI was writing a romantic premise for two characters I didn’t really see in aromantic way, but I didn’t want to go back on it because I was writing for an eventand had two wonderful artists who’d chosen my initial summary and I didn’t wantto mess them around. I really enjoyed the art I received but I’m pretty surethe fact I wasn’t really feeling it shows through in the fic.

8. shortest completed fic youwrote this year

Did a quick sort by wordcount on ao3 which reveals it was Objective which… I had norecollection of writing when I first saw it 😂 it was way back in January and at 600 words foran event week it was obviously more spur of the moment than something thatspent a lot of time in my head planning. But I gave it a quick reread and I’m prettypleased with it!

10. shortest wip of the year

I don’t have a lot of WIPs in the posting sense althoughthere’s plenty lurking on my harddrive. Of the two incomplete fics on ao3 thatI’ve updated this year the shortest is Something About Decemberin terms of wordcount posted, but that’s going to be wrapped by theend of the year and the WIP file is already overtaking (f)hated whichfell to plot holes back in February though I am still hoping to wrap up

and 14 i’ve already answered

end of year fic asks