#the winter fic exchange 2k23

[wyattjohnston]

you always did feel just like home - nathan mackinnon

summary: valorie hadn't meant to be away from nova scotia for so long, and she hadn't meant to immediately insert herself back into nate's life. mysterious how the universe works.

word count: 11,365

warning: not exactly healthy alcohol consumption

note: it is finally time for me to put my money where my mouth is and post my exchange fic instead of just bothering everybody else! this is written for the winter fic exchange 2k23 and i wrote it for cait (hey @blueskrugs that's you)! i hope you like it! thanks to @matthewtkachuk, @comphy-and-cozy @farbutnevergone & @laurenairay who have all provided feedback as this grew to be a lot longer than anticipated.

playlist: | looking back - parachute | wait - knuckle puck | longshot - catfish and the bottlemen | selfish - the kite string tangle | i'm in love with you - the 1975 |

Valorie hadn’t intended to be late and it meant that she was immediately the centre of attention when she walked into the café. She spotted the table of her friends that was discretely to the side and out of the way, though that discretion flew out the window when Amber and Valorie squealed as they saw each other.

They rushed to close the distance, throwing their arms around one another in a hug that only remained upright because Mike was standing close enough by to keep them that way. Valorie, after pulling away from Amber, greeted Mike with a more subdued but no less friendly hug.

Neither Mike nor Amber were who she’d noticed first, though, because the third person at the table was Nathan MacKinnon and he was a man who was impossible to miss.

Despite how much she wanted to step forward and greet him in the exact same way, Valorie wasn’t sure where the boundaries were, so she opted for saying, “I would have thought you’d be far too good to hang out with us lowly commoners.”

Nate smirked, looking as if he’d been expecting it, but it wasn’t him who spoke next.

“We haven’t seen you half as much as him in the last seven years,” Mike said, thumping his hand across Nate’s broad chest. Valorie was momentarily distracted by just how broad it was; those years had been very good to him.

Mike continued, “Dogg knows where he came from.”

“Yes, yes, I’m the worst,” Valorie said with an eyeroll as she pushed everyone back to their seats. Nate paused for long enough that Valorie greeted him with a hug and a lingering kiss on his cheek.

Valorie sat opposite Nate, tucking her legs underneath her own chair to avoid accidentally entangling them with his—the length of his was a memory firmly engrained in her mind.

Immediately it became clear that the conversation was not going to trend towards the Cup like she’d been hoping. It was far and away the most exciting thing she could think of for any of them to talk about, but she supposed that everyone had had the same thought since Nate arrived back in Nova Scotia.

Instead, Amber lifted Valorie’s wrist to get a closer inspection of the bracelet she was wearing and the boys leant in, too.

“Got to keep the jewellery, I see,” Amber said, her voice slightly awed. Valorie couldn’t blame her.

“Everything but the car,” Valorie said. “It would have been useless up here anyway. Definitely not meant for winter tyres.”

“You should have kept it and flipped it,” Mike said, tapping against the table in thought. “An Audi, wasn’t it?”

“Porsche.”

Mike whistled low and impressed, Nate’s eyebrow twitched—Valorie almost missed it—and he leaned back in his seat. Valorie could only imagine what cars Nate was driving around Colorado or Nova Scotia. As nice as her Porsche was, she was sure it paled in comparison.

Valorie pulled back her hand, hiding it away under the table to stop Amber playing with it any longer.

“You still wear what he bought you?” Nate asked, his voice curiously tight as his eyes flicked between her face and where the bracelet was hidden under the table.

Valorie thought for a moment, cataloguing everything she had put on that morning. “I think everything I’m wearing was a gift from him. It wasn’t a bad break up; no bad memories associated with any of it.”

Until that moment, Valorie had been perfectly comfortable with the idea of it—her entire wardrobe had been bought by her ex so she didn’t have much choice anyway, but under Nate’s careful gaze every inch of fabric felt suffocatingly heavy.

“Why did you break up?” Amber asked. “It sounds perfect.”

“I wanted to come home,” Valorie answered simply, one shoulder rising in a shrug as she tried to casually avoid eye contact with her friends.

“He had enough money; you could have come home whenever you wanted.”

“What? You think I’ve been back, like, twice in seven years because that’s what I wanted?” Valorie asked, somewhat viciously, directing her words and the accompanying glare at Mike. “There was always someone to meet, something to do, somewhere to be and I couldn’t ever get away. I missed home.”

Mike, rightfully chastened, lowered himself down in his chair just enough to let Valorie know he regretted what he’d said. Nate and Amber were sitting in an awkward silence and Valorie had to speak just to move them along.

She continued, “And I was bored as hell. I was asked if I’d be interested in the Real Housewives of Miami reboot and if I stayed much longer I would have said yes just to have something to do.”

Amber’s laugh was raucous, eliciting the same from Valorie, and she said, “You’re too young to be on that show.”

“That’s most of the reason I said no!” Valorie shrieked, still laughing. “That and I was actually a housewife? The other women on that show have, like, careers and are important and aren’t just sitting at home complaining about doing yoga.”

“I’d watch a show that was you doing yoga.”

Three heads turned to Nate, all barking out surprised laughs at his deadpan voice accompanied by the casual expression that remained on his face—almost as if he hadn’t said anything at all.

Mike thumped Nate across the chest, as he’d done earlier, and said, “We all know you would, Nate.”

“That’s really it, though?” Nate pressed on, not even looking at Mike as he thumped him back, “You couldn’t come up with a schedule where you got to come home more?”

“It wasn’t going to work,” Valorie said firmly. Nate tilted his head but was kind enough to not press her any further.

Despite all the talk of Valorie living a lavish lifestyle, when it came to ordering food she was conservative with her money. She didn’t have a choice when that money was coming out of her own, not very large bank account. It didn’t matter in the end, because Nate quickly took over and promised that he’d pay after ordering a ludicrous amount of food all the while flicking his gaze to Valorie every few seconds.

After they’d finished eating—having spent so long that it was clear they were only being allowed to stay because they were with Nate—Mike and Amber hurried off before they were late to see Amber’s parents, leaving Nate and Valorie on the sidewalk out the front.

“Where are you living?” Nate asked, his keys twirling in his hands. “Do you want a ride?”

Valorie nodded, surprised but please, “Oh, yeah, thank you. I’m staying with my parents. They haven’t moved.”

He didn’t say anything as he started moving towards the parking lot behind the café. It hadn’t changed much since they were 16, slowly walking back to Nate’s second-hand truck after a date neither of them really wanted to end.

“You’re back with your parents?”

“I haven’t had a job in seven years, nobody will hire me, and nobody will let me lease a house without pay cheques so…”

“That’s rough.”

“It’s fine,” she insisted. Nate’s face screwed up, so she added, “I still get on with my parents so it’s really fine.”

The Porsche Cayenne he led her to wasn’t so much a surprise, given the dealership that would have jumped at the chance to have one of their vehicles driven by Stanley Cup Champion Nathan MacKinnon—it was, however, a reminder of the 911 she’d left behind in Miami.

Of everything she’d left behind in Miami.

They were sitting in the Cayenne out the front of Valorie’s parents’ house, her hand on the door handle, when Nate said, “I’ve got room at my place if you want it.”

“That’s really sweet of you, Nate,” she smiled back at him, appreciative, “but I don’t have any money to pay rent.”

Valorie opened the door and looked back into the car when she was standing upright, to thank Nate for dropping her off.

“I don’t need rent from you.”

“Nate.”

“Just say the word, Val.”

Moving into one of Nate’s spare bedrooms was easier than Valorie had anticipated; Nate picked her up a few days after he dropped her at her parents’ home in Crichton Park, loaded some bags into the trunk and unloaded them into a bedroom with a lake front view in Grand Lake.

He’d declared that everything in the house was hers if she wanted it and raised a challenging eyebrow when she walked into the wine room and declared that she’d start with the most expensive bottle and work her way down—she knew exactly which one it was, too, even with a cursory glance at the bottles lining the walls.

“It’s probably not as nice where you lived in Miami,” Nate said as he finished the tour.

Valorie laughed, “The lovely Mediterranean Revival home that he gutted and turned into a Hypermodern nightmare so the inside and the outside clashed? The one that didn’t even have a view of the beach? I’ll miss a lot of things about Miami but that house is not one of them.”

“I didn’t know you cared about that stuff.”

“Architecture?” she clarified, waiting for Nate’s slow nod before she shrugged. “I had a lot of time to kill.”

Valorie spent most of that first day on the deck overlooking Grand Lake, it wasn’t quite warm enough for her to venture into the pool, but it was perfect to just sit and watch the water and the occasional jet-skier zip past.

Nate left her to her own devices for what might have been a few hours before he joined her and started asking questions about what she’d like for dinner so that he could head to the store.

“You gonna cook for me, Dogg?” Valorie asked, tilting her head over the back of the chair so that she could see Nate properly. “What if I want risotto?”

There was a brief moment where it looked like Nate’s brain short-circuited before he collected himself and said, “I can offer you steak or chicken breast. Salad or vegetables.”

“So many options,” Valorie said, a small laugh in her voice, as she pushed herself off the chair. “If you cook the steak, I’ll make the salad.”

“Sorry, there aren’t more options.”

“Two more than I’d be able to offer.”

The admission didn’t seem to surprise Nate, who just accepted what Valorie had said without question—Mike and Amber had surely passed on a few things about Valorie’s time in Miami and the chef she had was one of their favourite thing to bring up.

Valorie used Nate going to the store as an opportunity to wander through the house. It wasn’t as large as she was expecting, so it didn’t take very long at all—especially not when she avoided Nate’s bedroom out of respect for his privacy. She opened every cupboard in the kitchen, just to make sure she knew where everything was kept, and then unloaded the dishwasher when it beeped at her incessantly. In the fridge was an open bottle of sparkling red wine, so Valorie helped herself to a glass on the balcony while she waited for Nate to return.

The calmness of Nova Scotia was something Valorie had forgotten she’d missed until she was back; even in the height of summer, with the excitement of the Cup coming back, she was more relaxed than she’d ever been in Miami.

When Nate returned Valorie greeted him with a big smile as she raised the wine she’d poured herself—her second of the afternoon—and he returned it without hesitation.

She continued to drink as they made dinner, her easy and boring salad taking no time at all, and Nate cracked a beer while he grilled and then opened a new bottle of wine for them as they ate on the balcony overlooking the lake as the sun slowly began to set.

Despite the view she had—she’d been staring at it all day, after all—Valorie couldn’t help but watch Nate as he ate, mostly scrutinising the lines of his face that were so much different to what she once knew.

“You keep looking at me like you don’t believe I exist,” Nate said. Valorie didn’t even flinch; another two glasses of wine making her particularly carefree.

“I don’t know if I do,” she admitted, sighing as she realised that even his voice had changed. “I’ve seen you on the TV and in photos and everything but for the past seven years the image of you in my head has always been you the last summer I saw you. You were a kid and now you’re a man and I really don’t know how to deal with that.”

“Yeah,” Nate agreed, his voice a lot softer and more serious than it had been. “I know. I get it.”

Amber and Mike came over to spend time on the lake not too long into Valorie’s time with Nate. It was a perfect day, which Valorie had come to expect, and being out on the Sea Doos was the perfect way to spend it.

It was nice to have company.

Nate had taken to visiting his parents’ house if he was going to see them. He always offered for Valorie to join him, but that felt like it was encroaching on boundaries she wasn’t even sure they’d set. She’d tried, though, to get him to invite them over only to be met with a shake of the head—maybe he was worried about different boundaries being breached. Valorie didn’t know.

Amber and Mike were good company, at least. Valorie was always happy that Amber had stuck by her even when she wasn’t around. Mike… Mike she could take or leave depending on the day.

“Why’d you really leave what’s-his-face?” Mike asked, apropos of nothing and a few beers deep.

Amber glared at him, though it went unnoticed. Nate sat up a little straighter and Valorie couldn’t work out if it was Mike-related or Nick-related.

“I already told you,” Valorie said, forcing a polite twinge into her voice even if she was dreading whatever might come next.

“Yeah, but there’s gotta be more to it,” Mike argued.

“Why?”

“I love this place, but if Amber wanted to move to, I don’t know, LA and never come back I’d do it in a heartbeat. And with the money you had? Easiest decision I’ll ever make.”

“He doesn’t want kids,” she relented, though it was not without steeliness as she tried to put a definitive end to the topic. “No amount of money was worth not being a mom.”

“That’s some serious self-control,” Mike said, shaking his head almost as if he was in awe. “I can think of a lot of things I’d give up for the life you were living.”

“It’s all Valorie ever wanted,” Nate said, his voice deep and low. “She was born to be a mom.”

Valorie’s gaze moved slowly to Nate as she replayed the words in her mind. He hadn’t moved from how he’d been sitting at the start of the conversation, hadn’t even looked away from Mike. She wanted him to look at her, to make eye contact to be able to get a read on him; to see if the skip it caused in her heartbeat was for an actual reason.

“It took you seven years with this guy to work out you were on a different page?” Mike asked incredulously, earning a half-hearted shrug from Valorie who looked back to him with hesitation.

“He said he was undecided. I loved him, you know? I was willing to wait it out in the hopes that kids would be on the table.”

Mike then agreed, “I’d wait seven years if I spent the entire time being a trophy wife.”

“It wasn’t about all the material possessions,” she snapped. “I know that’s what it looked like, but I’m upset you all think I’m a gold digger.”

“If the Louboutins fit,” Mike said with an eyebrow waggle.

“We know you aren’t a gold digger,” Amber said, finally, and firmly, contributing to the conversation, “or you wouldn’t have come back.”

Mike leaned back in his chair, pointed up at Nate’s house watching over them and said, rather loudly, “Right into Nate’s sweet digs.”

His loudness was met with silence, thick and tense, and the three people that stared at him didn’t seem to bother him at all.

“Do you even like me, Mike?” Valorie asked, tired.

“Come on, Val. I’m just joking around.” He added, after a hearty hunk across the back of the head courtesy of Nate, “I’ll cool it.”

The weather had turned quite quickly and quite dramatically—what had been the perfect weather the week prior had turned so miserable that Valorie was looking out the floor to ceiling windows as if her death stare could part the black clouds.

Nate was somewhere on the island doing something hockey related that he’d told Valorie about the night before while she was half asleep on the couch, so she was, once again, left in the house to her own devices.

A second car had appeared in the garage a couple of days after her arrival and Nate had assured her that she could drive it whenever she needed; Valorie was going to avoid driving it as long as she could.

The wine room was taking more of a hit than Valorie had expected when she’d joked with Nate about drinking it all; she had very few places to go, and her mother was more than happy to drive to Grand Lake to pick her up if there were family plans so she rarely had to drive, so the day drinking was getting more out of hand than she wanted to admit. It was a similar problem to Miami, she was realising, but Nate’s house wasn’t filled with quite so many time-wasting objects and there was only so much baking she could do when Nate rarely had any visitors.

Her response to the door opening had become Pavlovian, especially since being confined inside by the rain. Valorie was on her feet, pretending to walk to the kitchen to refill her glass of red, so that she’d be able to start a conversation with Nate when he walked in.

Only, it wasn’t Nate.

“Uh… Sidney. Hi. Nate’s not here. I’m Valorie—Val,” she said, all in a rush, putting her glass on the counter and desperately hoping she didn’t have red teeth.

“Nice to see you again, Val,” Sidney said, polite and friendly. “Nate told me to let myself in; he’ll be back soon.”

The shock and awe Valorie felt being around Sidney—Sid—had disappeared after exactly one summer of learning that he was nowhere near as cool as she had built him up to be. That being said, she had not expected him to remember her for a second.

“Do you want some cookies?” she asked, quickly, noticing that Sid was hovering uncertainly. “I made way too many.”

Sid smiled, nodded, and sat down at one of the bar stools on the other side of the counter while Valorie plated up an assortment of ginger snaps, Florentines, sugar cookies and Afghan biscuits all while trying not to let the wine she’d been drinking rattle her.

“Killing the boredom of being stuck inside all day?” Sid asked, drawing the plate towards him and inspecting his choices as if she was going to stop him at one.

“It’s what I do and what I’ve done for years now.” Valorie shrugged. “I drink and I bake.”

“I hope you don’t mind if I say that sounds… underwhelming.”

“Oh, no!” Valorie gasped instantly. “I mean, I got really into yoga and reading, too. I wasn’t just some boozy housewife. I love to bake, though. I could do it all day. Wine?”

Sid agreed to a glass, and Valorie pretended that she didn’t know he was doing it so she wouldn’t be drinking alone.

“Are you happy to be back here? Back home?” Sid asked around a not-yet-finished mouthful of ginger snap. “You’ve been gone a long time.”

It was, to say the least, unnerving to have Sidney Crosby—anybody, really—sitting across from her and calling her out for being gone. They weren’t friends, like Amber and Mike, or whatever else, like Nate, and she couldn’t wrap her head around why he would care to bring it up.

She took a healthy sip of her wine, savouring the taste for longer than was strictly necessary and said, “I was always trying to get back. It just never… It was hard to get away. I’m glad to be back.”

“I’m sure the island is happy to have you back,” he said, removing the unease in Valorie’s stomach flawlessly as he looked out over the deck to the lake. “Sorry the weather didn’t hold up for you.”

“It was nice for a while,” she conceded, following Sid’s eyes, “and at least it’s the same all day. I was really not impressed by Miami deciding there was a torrential downpour every afternoon after the perfect morning. Seven years there and I never got used to it.”

Valorie moved their conversation to the couch, carrying the wine with her while Sid carried the cookies he was slowly making his way through. She let Sid talk about his off-season plans, to what he’d already done since returning to Nova Scotia, noting that he was absolutely downplaying the vacation he and Kathy had taken and skipping over the extraordinarily nice or expensive parts. She loved Antigua, knew it inside and out, but was happy to let Sid tell her what he thought was appropriate—he may have been happy to ask her why she’d been gone so long but it was clear not much more information than that had made it his way.

By the time Nate was home—his definition of ‘soon’ stretching Valorie’s just a little—she was desperate to just be anywhere that wasn’t near anyone, not just Sid and the way he knew too much yet absolutely nothing. She excused herself within moments to use the bathroom, heading downstairs to her ensuite.

On her way down the staircase, she heard, the beginning of their conversation:

“Val was just filling me in on her time in Miami.”

“She really enjoyed it, right? It sounds great.”

“That’s… one way to put it.”

Walking through Halifax with Nate by her side was an experience. He’d mentioned it in passing, that people were more interested in him than normal, but Valorie hadn’t taken it to mean it was quite so relentless.

Kids wanted their jerseys autographed, everyone wanted a photo and every other person wanted to stand there on the street with Nate and listen to him recount his entire career from Bantam to what training he’d been doing since he got back to Nova Scotia.

Their trip into Halifax had been for no reason other than the sudden realisation by Nate that Valorie hadn’t left the house in an alarming amount of time outside of her new part-time job at one of the local hobby stores, so it wasn’t like the constant stopping was preventing them from doing anything in particular.

It was, however, resulting in Valorie entering a lot of stores that she otherwise had no intention of going into just so that people could gush over Nate. And at least one purchase of a dress she didn’t need.

One person who stopped them was a classmate from high school who stopped them to question Valorie about her disappearance just as much as she stopped to gush over Nate. Valorie didn’t even remember her name and the woman hadn’t taken the time to introduce herself.

“It’s so cute that you’re back for Nate, though,” she said. “I always knew you guys would end up in the same place.”

“Well, that place is home for us, so.”

“Oh, I know, but I heard all about you in Miami and obviously Nate’s making magic in Denver so it’s just nice to see you two in the same place again.”

“Yeah, it’s great,” Nate said, nodding even as he was subtly moving out of her way and directing Valorie in the same direction. “We’ve gotta head off, though. It was great to see you again.”

“Of course, sorry! You must be so busy! We should definitely catch up!”

There was more nodding and agreeing as they walked past her, Valorie checking back over her shoulder quickly in one last attempt to help her remember?”

“What was her name?” she asked Nate when they were well out of earshot.

Nate admitted easily, his face lighting up with a guilty smile, “No fucking idea.”

Valorie walked into him as she laughed, unable to control herself as it erupted from her mouth. Nate laughed, too, the guilt shifting from his face and they were holding each other up on the sidewalk as they struggled to breath.

The laughter continued, albeit subdued, as they made their way to the one thing they’d agreed upon getting: ice cream. It was an otherwise peaceful work, seemingly already having run into everyone who wanted a few minutes of Nate’s time.

Being out in public with Nate was different to being alone with him at home, Valorie noticed, and it was different to how they’d been as teenagers. He always carried himself with a confidence that was beyond him in years, almost a quiet arrogance as he always knew where he was going to end up—Valorie would have given anything to know when the arrogance disappeared. Was it because of the Cup win? His accomplishment proof enough that he was everything he ever said he was going to be. Was it seasons earlier when it didn’t look as clear?  

At the ice cream shop, Nate ordered Butterscotch ripple and then laughed under his breath as Valorie ordered Maple Walnut.

“Why is that funny?”

“You’re so Canadian.”

Noting the children around, Valorie glared at him, mouthing ‘fuck you’ before she continued out loud, “I’m going to enjoy all the maple flavoured things. You can’t stop me.”

“I wouldn’t dare. I will laugh at you, though.”

They sat on a table out the front, Nate saying hello to a few starstruck kids as they did so.

“What are you staring at?” Valorie asked, her cheeks warming up under Nate’s watchful eye.

“Just wanted to see if you were still a psycho who bites their ice cream.”

Valorie made direct eye contact with him and bit into the top of her ice cream, causing Nate to shudder dramatically.

Halifax was bustling in a way that Valorie had never seen. The decision to not have the parade in Cole Harbor was purposeful, a clear differentiation from Sid’s parades and a nice thank you to Halifax for his time with the Mooseheads.

She made her way through the crowd unimpeded, even as she headed towards the rooftop she’d been told to head to near the end of the parade route, overlooking City Hall.

Nate had let Valorie know that it was where Sid would be, hidden out of sight—a decision he’d made himself. He hadn’t even relented when Nate, drunkenly, begged him to be beside him; Valorie was grateful that Sid had the awareness to decline.

Sid was already at the rooftop with Kathy, set up with a table, chairs and some food and drink to get them through the parade and the speech Nate was going to give after.

“I hope it’s okay that I’m here,” Valorie said sheepishly, unsure if Nate had told them she’d be there. “This is where they sent me.”

“More than okay.” Sid pulled up a chair from the group of them nearby. “You didn’t want to be down there with him?”

Valorie stepped to the edge of the roof, taking in the swathes of people lined along the streets. Sid and Kathy were both watching her curiously as she turned back to them and took a seat, putting Sid in the middle.

“It wouldn’t feel right. Nate and I aren’t anything, you know.”

“That’s not true, though, is it?” Sid asked. “Or you’d be in the crowd, not up here.”

Valorie froze in her seat, only her eyes moving to follow Sid’s hand as it disappeared beside him and came back with a cooler bag that he pulled wine from.

“Do you moonlight as a shrink?”

“For Nate, yeah, I feel like I do.” He carried on, no beats missed, “I don’t have red, will white do?”

It played in her mind as she drank her wine and ate from the platter that had been set up. Nate hadn’t offered for her to be by his side—she would have turned it down immediately even if he had—and when he’d suggested she sit with Sid it felt, to her, that was the next best thing.

She wasn’t overly talkative during the wait, choosing to just stare out over the edge of the roof at the other side of the street and the people who were in nearly chaotically good spirits. She was hearing vague parts of the conversations Sid and Kathy were having, and answering questions when asked, but for the most part she was lost in the magic of the Stanley Cup being back in Nova Scotia.

Valorie had been in Cole Harbour for Sid’s 2009 Cup Parade as a small and spindly 13-year-old, watching the Cup from a distance.

That morning she’d been able to run her fingers across the engraved names.

“Is it the happiest you’ve ever been?” Valorie asked, not even bothering to quieten her voice so that Kathy wouldn’t hear. “He doesn’t talk about it as much as I thought he would.”

Sid shifted his entire body to face her and Valorie immediately felt like she was about to get a talking to; she forced herself not to shrink.

“If you want him to talk about it you have to let him know he can. I promise you he won’t shut up about it.”

“Oh. Does he think I don’t care? That’s not true,” she said, worried. “I don’t want him to think I don’t care.”

The timing was on point for the parade to enter their vision, no longer just the distant sound of the band. Even as Valorie continued to think about the possibility that Nate didn’t know how much she cared about what he’d achieved, she couldn’t help but be delighted by the sight of Gabe and Cogs very, very drunk in the first carriage that came through.

When Nate came clearly into view, the Cup held high above his head, Valorie felt her heart swell and tears prick the corners of her eyes.

“It is,” Sid said, barely audible over the band and the crowd. “The happiest I’ve ever been.”

Nate had a million things planned for the rest of his day; had a lot of people to introduce the Cup to. Long after he had disappeared from the parade and after the streets of Halifax started to clear, Valorie remained on the roof with Sid and Kathy, swapping stories until their skin was turning pink.

The fact that Sid remembered her, let alone willing to talk with her like an old friend, was still very much blowing Valorie’s mind but it wasn’t something she was going to draw attention to lest it ruin the chill vibe they’d settled into.

They walked to the bar where the party would really kick off, Sid easily blending into the small crowds still milling around Halifax—the occasional person shouting at him, at everyone near them, at the wind. The excitement felt like it was never going to leave.

Waiting for Nate felt like an age, somehow felt even longer than all seven years Valorie had been away. Maybe it was sitting beside an already very drunk Mike, or maybe it was the intense anticipation coursing through her because she knew that Nate could walk through the doors with the Stanley Cup at any moment.

Maybe it was that she was pulled into a conversation with Gabe Landeskog who looked only marginally more sober than he had in the carriage; the beers he was double fisting were sure to fix that.

“Long time no see, Valorie,” he said, his tone giving no indication whether that was good or bad. “All the way back at Nate’s first game, right?”

Valorie was hesitant to respond, and opted for an honest, “That was the only one I got to, yes.”

“He missed you a lot that year.” Gabe paused to drink from one of his beers and Valorie waited for the rest of the thought. “The year after, too, but different.”

“I missed him, too,” Valorie admitted readily; that wasn’t something she’d ever been shy about.

Gabe nodded at her, then raised his chin to say hello to someone who had just walked into the room—it wasn’t Nate, Val checked—and then put his beers down on the table between them so that he could collapse into the empty seat.

“It’s good you’re back together. He’s really happy about it.”

“We’re not—he’s happy because he’s done the one thing you guys aim to do. He’s beaten the final boss. The Elite Four were no match for you guys.”

“No, no, sure he’s happy about that.” Gabe insisted, “It’s a different happy now. A more complete happy.”

“I don’t think you’re making any sense. You should go drink some water.”

Gabe protested, downing one of the beers in a matter of seconds as if that would prove he didn’t need water. Her lip quirked up at the action, both from amusement and bemusement.

Nate finally walked in, well after everyone else was a few drinks in and getting rowdy. His arrival increased the already loud bar enough to make Valorie cover one of her ears while raising the other into the air as she joined the hollering.

Nate finally walked in, well after everyone else was a few drinks in and getting rowdy. His arrival made it worse in that the noise levels were high enough to make Valorie cover one of her ears while raising the other into the air as she joined the hollering.

He and the Cup were moved around the room like he was in a pinball machine, from person to person, from shot glass to shot glass, until at last he was in front of her. The Cup had been deposited somewhere else in the room and Valorie didn’t care enough to locate it; after all, she wasn’t there to see the Stanley Cup.

With a lack of hesitation that couldn’t even be passed off on any drinking she’d been doing, Valorie threw herself at Nate, overcome by the need to make sure he knew she cared about what he’d achieved.

Nate wasn’t immediately ready for it, Valorie’s arms around his neck as she pulled him closer, but he soon realised what was happening and moved his arms around her waist to pull her off the ground.

“I’m so proud of you,” she said, breathless and rushed into his ear. “You’re so good at—at hockey and at knowing me and at taking care of me. But hockey, Nate. I want to hear all about it, okay? Probably tomorrow so I can appreciate it, but I do. I watched it. All six games. I cried I was so proud of you. I am so proud of you. You’re so good.”

“You watched?” he asked back, his warm breath brushing over her own ear and causing her to pull back with her head tilted and her face contorted.

“Yes, Nate. Of course. I thought you knew. I didn’t think I had to tell you.”

Nate pulled her back in, his face buried in her neck. The room may as well have been empty with the way all of Valorie’s senses honed in on Nate—he’d showered before coming, put on cologne that made her head spin, and his warm breath fanned across her neck which made the spinning worse.

If a loud, roaring round of applause hadn’t broken out, Valorie could have stayed pressed against him all night. As it were, though, she pulled back in a dramatic fashion and put a reasonable distance between them before contributing to the clapping—putting gross enthusiasm into it.

Nate laughed, then made a few embarrassed gestures of acknowledgement, before accepting a beer that was being handed to him.

Valorie disappeared, leaving Nate to be bounced around the room again, and hid away with Amber and Mike. They were good and spoke to their other high school friends, all of whom were surprised to see Valorie in the flesh. Luckily for her, the Cup was more than enough of a distraction from any of them asking her what she’d been up to while she was gone.

As the night grew later, it became very clear that Nate’s long day was catching up with him. He was trying, valiantly, to be the last person kicking at the bar, though his demeanour was getting progressively testier as time passed.

“I’m gonna head out. Do you want to come or stay?” she asked, brushing her hand gently over Nate’s shoulders.

“You’re leaving?” he asked, sullen, his arm snaking around her waist and pulling her towards his chair. “You should stay.”

“Amber’s driving me home—if I leave you here can you get home?”

“You should stay,” he repeated, eliciting a laugh from the group he was sitting with.

Valorie laughed with them and ran her hand over his head, insisting that she was leaving whether or not he was coming with her. He hummed, resigned, but let her go so that she could follow Amber outside.

Valorie waited against the wall outside, her head resting back against the cool brick, while Amber went to get her car—Mike went with Amber, mostly because Valorie refused to be the one responsible for him keeping to the sidewalk and off the road.

The door opened and Valorie turned her head, expecting to just wave to somebody as they left, and was surprised to see Nate stepping out.

“Everything alright? You coming home?” she asked, reaching out to him without a second thought. Nate went to her easily.

“I’m going to stay for a bit longer,” he said, standing in front of her. He wasn’t boxing her into the bricks but he was definitely close enough that it wouldn’t take much at all to get there—Valorie thought it would be nice if he did.

“Why are you out here, then?” she asked, her fingers resting in his belt loops.

“I need to…”

Nate didn’t finish his sentence, just lowered his head little by little. Valorie tilted her chin up, pushing back against the wall to get a bit more height.

He wasn’t the same Nate she’d kissed at eighteen—he was broader, bigger in every sense and it was intoxicating to be pressed against the wall by the Nate she’d come to learn. In her mind she was expecting desperation, a need to make up for lost time. It didn’t come, though, and yet Valorie still felt lightheaded when he broke their kiss.

“Will you be in my bed when I get home?”

Valorie scoffed, a little disappointed, “Nate.”

“Not for like—I just want you there. I always want you there.”

She breathed out an “okay”, and kissed him again before sending him back inside to be with his lingering friends.

When he was gone and her head was clearer, Valorie opened her eyes and jumped off the wall at the sight of Amber’s car in front of her and Mike hanging out the passenger’s window.

She pushed Mike back into the car on her way to the backseat, asking before she even sat down, “How long were you there for?”

“Saw it all, babe,” Amber said, beaming into the rear-view mirror. “Never been happier to roll up on two people hooking up outside a bar.”

Valorie knew the second she woke up that things were different. The most immediately apparent difference was the snoring coming from beside her, accompanied by the warmth of an arm over her waist and a chest pressed against her back. Even the mattress underneath her felt different.

Then there was the fact that Nate had kissed her the night before, the catalyst for the other changes she supposed.

It wasn’t a bad different was her first major takeaway, and she relaxed back into the mattress. She couldn’t just lay there forever but she could for a little longer and enjoy the all-encompassing presence of Nate.

She had a fair idea of what time he usually woke up but couldn’t translate that into what might happen when he was hungover—which he was sure to be, and she couldn’t begrudge him that—so after lying in long enough that an ache started to settle in her sides, Valorie pulled herself out of Nate’s embrace and decided to start making breakfast.

Nothing fancy, of course, but she could whip up bacon and eggs and put some pods in a Nespresso machine without too much hassle. She hoped that the smell of food would wake him up, whether he was up to eating it or not and her hope was fulfilled when he wandered out while she was eating her own plate.

“You told me you couldn’t cook,” Nate said, dropping an easy kiss onto Valorie’s head as he passed her to the kitchen.

“I can use a fry pan.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.”

Eating across from Nate, with him smiling at her in a way he hadn’t since her return, was exactly what Valorie had been after and hadn’t known. Listening to him tell her all about the things she’d missed when he was off doing Stanley Cup things and filling him in in return. Everything he said was perfect and when he moved into telling her about the Cup win itself—“You have to do it again so I can be there.”

“I’ll give it my best go.”

Valorie grinned, picturing it all in her head. She held the image in her mind as she cleared the table and it all came crashing back down when she looked at Nate over the kitchen counter as she realised that their future relied on them talking about the new state of their relationship.

“We probably need to have a conversation or two,” Valorie said hesitantly, eyeing Nate over her coffee to check for any reaction at all. When he didn’t so much as blink, she added, “It’s just been like… six weeks and I don’t actually know what we are to each other.”

He wasn’t pleased, mumbling, “Do we have to have that conversation?”

“If we’re going where I want us to, then yeah, Nate.”

That caught his attention enough to have him properly look at her, no longer buried in his coffee. His question came slow and unsure, yet simultaneously hopeful, “Where do you want us to go?”

“I want us to be together again.”

His previously wary face transformed into a smile, small and barely noticeable. Valorie smiled back at him as she continued to drink her coffee. She didn’t know how to start whatever conversation it was that they needed to have—conversations were one of their strong suits as teenagers, Valorie was able to frame things in the perfect way or ask just the right questions to get Nate talking.

Just as she was trying to come up with a way to get him talking, Nate was the one who spoke first.

“Why’d you move to Miami with him?”

Valorie froze. It made sense, in hindsight, that Nate would be the one leading the conversation when she was the one who’d left, and yet it was still like being doused in cold water to have the question asked of her so directly.

She swallowed the sudden lump in her throat, and provided the simplest explanation she had, “I thought I was going to marry him.”

“I thought you were going to marry me.”

“Obviously that didn’t happen, Nate.”

“Yeah,” he said, because it was entirely obvious that it hadn’t happened and the look on his face showed that he didn’t like to be reminded of it. “And I’m still trying to work out why.”

“Nate, it was seven years ago.” She added, stressed, “We were kids.”

“I still don’t know why you broke up with me, Valorie.”

“Valorie?” she all but screeched, her full name coming from his lips sending a horrible quake down her spine and through her body.

Nate powered on, “You broke up with me and you left and to this day I don’t know why that was.”

“I wasn’t happy, Nate.”

The abrupt silence was worse than the conversation. Valorie sat there, wishing she could take back those four little words—she would if she’d known just how instantly Nate would close up.

His entire face, which had at least been showing his unhappiness and discomfort, was no longer telling her a single thing about how he was feeling. Except with that, she knew exactly how he was feeling.

She opened her mouth, ready to try and do damage control, to try to take it back so that he wouldn’t look like that, except not a single word came out.

Nate beat her to it, though, the sadness gone from his face but still very present in his voice. “Why didn’t you talk to me? I know that the long distance wasn’t great—why didn’t you talk to me?”

“None of it was your fault, Nate,” Valorie stressed, reaching across the table towards him even though he was out of reach. “You were the best thing I had going at the time. I couldn’t keep a job and I couldn’t continue with college because I kept failing the classes and I needed to leave so that I could work on all of that and not drag you down with me.”

“Did it work?”

“Yeah, over the next twelve months I learnt a lot, I grew a lot. I actually was going to ask if you wanted to try again when we were both back here the next summer, but you brought a girlfriend.”

“Rachel.”

“She was lovely,” Valorie said, truthfully.

“Why didn’t you talk to me?”

“And fuck up the thin hold you had on your mental health by dragging you down with my problems?”

“Breaking up with me and then ghosting me did a pretty good job of that.”

Valorie finally pulled her hands back to her lap, knowing that that one sentence was a sure sign that Nate wasn’t going to hold them. Him leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest made it even clearer.

She didn’t know what to say, no amount of explaining was going to be enough and she didn’t want him to think she was making excuses. At the time it had felt like the right thing to do, breaking up with him without any real reason, in the years that had past she’d come to her own realisations that maybe it wasn’t.

Nate’s voice was gruff when he asked, “When did you meet Nick?”

“The first year I was gone…” Valorie said with a sigh. “Sometime in early 2015. Before I came back that summer. We weren’t together at that point because I thought… I thought we—” she gestured between herself and Nate “—could try again. But you know…”

“Rachel,” Nate filled in, uncrossing his arms.

“Rachel. So I went back to Miami, I found Nick because he’d been good to me while I was there but we’re here now anyway. You and me.”

He nodded, still expressionless. Valorie’s leg twitched under the table, up and down repetitively, as she tried to will herself to let Nate be the next person to speak.

“You and me?” he asked, after a long silence.

“If you still want me.”

Nate sighed, pushing his chair back and standing. Valorie watched him, worried that he was going to walk away from the table—from their conversation. He walked around the table towards her, though, and Valorie didn’t have to be told to stand and meet him halfway.

Nate didn’t have anything special planned for his birthday, much to Valorie’s horror. He was going to see his family for lunch—with an invite extended to Valorie which she was more than happy to accept. She couldn’t help but laugh when she arrived and saw Sid and Kathy sitting at the table on the back porch.

“You’re almost like a second father,” Valorie joked, in lieu of a proper greeting. “You’re just everywhere. All Nate’s big moments.”

“I’m really not that old,” Sid argued.

“I was thirteen when I watched you bring the Cup to Cole Harbour. That makes you pretty old.”

He scoffed, “I turned 22 that year.”

Valorie hummed and nodded knowingly, “Old.”

She watched him roll his eyes, noting the affection on his face, and moved on to greet Kathy properly.

It was, otherwise, an uneventful lunch. Valorie was appreciative of the invite, more than pleased to finally be with Nate’s family—back with Nate’s family, and being treated as if she’d never left in the first place. Her smile was ever present, only growing as she watched Nate shift uncomfortably while Happy Birthday was sung at him. Especially when she knew she was going to sing it at him again that evening.

They stayed there until late in the afternoon and Valorie tried not to let her impatience show because she liked spending time with his family, with Sid and Kathy, but she had plans for dinner that she didn’t want to mess up. Nate knew, though, at least vaguely, so they left early enough that Valorie could relax.

When they got home, she banished him to his bedroom so that she could start to cook and set the table with the fancy table setting she’d bought the day before. She was meticulous about their dinner, returning to the recipe far more than was probably necessary to ensure that it was exactly how it needed to be, and felt a true sense of pride as it all came together.

“Can I come back out?” Nate asked, still hidden behind the wall.

Valorie looked around her, taking in the pan she was using and the cleanliness of the kitchen before she told him that he could.

He bypassed the set table, walked straight towards her, and peered over her shoulder to see what she was cooking. His laugh was gentle and sincere.

“Are you making me risotto?”

“I’ve been practising,” she admitted. “When I went to Amber’s the other day we did a test run and it was actually pretty good!”

She giggled as Nate pulled her back from the stove and turned her around, kissing her so sweetly that she nearly melted into a puddle at his feet.

The whole shop stood still, except for the large bouquet of roses that was being walked to the counter; a deep red expertly pruned and assembled. Valorie knew exactly who they were from before they had even reached her.

Everyone huddled around the vase, customers included, as it was set down on the counter in front of Valorie. She knew who they were from without even looking at the note they came with, but there was a sudden hush when her co-worker read out the note on the card: Happy Birthday, mi amor. Love always, Nick.

“You sure that says Nick?” one of their customers asked—Valorie vaguely recognised her from school, though she was positive they hadn’t been in the same year. “Not Nate?”

“I mean—”

Valorie snatched the note more aggressively than she’d intended, saying, “Nick is a friend.”

The side eyes she got from both the customer and her co-worker were far from subtle but Valorie just buried the note in her pocket and carried the vase into the back room.

They—like everything Nick bought her—were gorgeous. He had somehow managed to send her the most perfect roses from Florida and she didn’t want to think about how much money had gone into them. Every day with Nick was filled with unnecessary luxuries and that only increased tenfold on her birthday.

Until the roses came along, Valorie’s day had been uneventful. She woke up early enough for her half-day shift at the hobby store—granted to her by her boss who was horrified that she hadn’t already asked for the whole day—and discovered that Nate was already awake and making her breakfast, and he planned on driving her into Halifax.

It was the most thoughtful gift she’d received in years.

He picked her up after her shift—and after her co-worker tried not so slyly to ask more questions about the roses—and Valorie was met with a bouquet of flowers as she opened the passenger’s side door. She rushed to sit in the car, pushing the vase of roses between her feet on the floor and reaching for the pink hydrangeas Nate held.

“Oh, they’re beautiful,” she gushed, hugging them to her chest as she inhaled. “Did you have to ask someone about my favourite flower or did you just remember?”

Nate mumbled, “Remembered.”

“I can’t believe it, that’s incredible.” She leaned across the centre console to kiss him and got his cheek when he turned his head but she was too distracted by the flowers to notice. “Should I look into the meaning behind these or are they just beautiful?”

Nate started the engine, keeping his eyes firmly on the road in front of him, and Valorie tried not to read into his tense jaw. Or the way he moved his hand to the steering wheel when she tried to hold it over the gearshift.

“Who did the roses come from?” he asked as they pulled into his garage after a painfully silent car ride.

She answered, cautiously, “Nick.”

“How does he know where you work?”

“I don’t know? Insta? I don’t care about the roses, you bought me hydrangeas.”

Nate only said, “okay” before he got out of the car and left Valorie sitting in it by herself. She watched him walk into the house with slumped shoulders and an aching chest before she tried to manoeuvre herself out of the car with the vase of roses and the very large bouquet of hydrangeas.

She put the roses on the kitchen counter and then scoured Nate’s cupboards for a vase so she could put the hydrangeas at the centre of the dining table. She passed Nate on the couch as she walked to the stairs, leaning down to kiss the top of his head and thank him as she did so.

Valorie tried to put it to the back of her mind as she got ready for her birthday plans—Amber had planned a whole afternoon and evening for her and Valorie had been planning her outfit for a week. It wasn’t going to be as extravagant as anything she’d done in Miami, which she’d assured Amber was more than fine, but it was her first birthday in Nova Scotia in years and her first birthday back with her best friend so she was going to make the most of it.

Putting it to the back of her mind worked well until she ascended the stairs and saw that Nate hadn’t moved from his position on the couch.

“Amber and Mike will be here soon—are you ready?”

Nate sunk further into the couch, his arms crossed tightly over his chest and his chin nearly buried into them which led to a mumbled, “I’m not really feeling it; you have fun.”

“You’re not feeling it?” she asked, hating the way her voice cracked in time with the crack in her heart. “It’s my birthday?”

“You go have fun,” he said, still into his arms. “Don’t worry about me.”

Valorie had never felt more pathetic, standing behind Nate when he wouldn’t even look at her, dressed up in one of the nicest she’d brought with her from Miami and had taken so much care with her make-up—not dressed up entirely for Nate but she definitely wanted him to at least look at her. Maybe even appreciate the effort she had gone to.

“Nate, I—I want you there,” Valorie said weakly, moving closer to him to see if she could get him to turn around. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just don’t want to go out again today.”

Valorie gave up with one last desperate look at Nate and she walked immediately through the front door to wait on the doorstep for Amber and Mike. She wasn’t going to cry about it, even if the furious blinking was barely stopping her—before Amber and Mike pulled up she pulled on her sunglasses and took some deep, centring breaths.

When Amber and Mike did pull up, this time with Amber hanging out the passenger’s side window and jumping out to pull Valorie into a tight hug as she screamed Happy Birthday in her ear, Valorie’s smile was genuine.

At least, it was until she climbed into the passenger’s seat at Amber’s insistence and they sat in the car for a few moments in silence.

“We can go,” she said, hoping that the crack in her voice wasn’t noticeable to anyone but herself.

“What about Nate?”

“I don’t want to talk about Nate.”

“I’ll fight him if you want me to,” Mike offered, completely sincerely, reaching down to unbuckle his seatbelt. “Can’t promise I’ll win but I’ll give it a go.”

“I don’t know what’s gotten into him and I don’t want to think about it for the rest of the day.”

Not thinking about it for the rest of the day was much easier said than done. It put a clear damper on the mood despite the smile Valorie was forcing into her face. For a few blissful moments she did forget, was able to just enjoy the company she was with and the drinks in front of her—and then it all came crashing back down on her with a heartbreaking thud.

Amber tried to talk about, to get an explanation as to why Valorie was upset and Nate wasn’t around and each time she was shut down by Valorie repeating that she didn’t want to talk about it and that she just wanted to enjoy her birthday.

There wasn’t much enjoyment happening, though, with Valorie staring morosely into every rum and coke she was drinking. They’d had Happy Hour cocktails, eaten some of the best steaks Valorie had ever come across and moved on to another bar to continue their night—it was everything Valorie hadn’t realised she missed and it was still being ruined by Nate.

Amber tried again, waiting until Valorie’s glass was empty, and Valorie reacted by standing up and saying that she needed some fresh air. When Amber tried to follow her, Valorie insisted that she was going alone.

Although Valorie had decided to go outside just to get away from any more questions, the fresh air did help. She hadn’t quite realised just how much the alcohol had gone to her head until she was confronted by the breeze coming off the river.

She rested her forehead against the cool bricks of the external walls, her arms crossed above her head, and counted her breaths in and out.

“Val?”

Valorie whipped around, her forehead and forearms scraping against the bricks, and was met with Nate’s concerned face.

“Thought you didn’t want to come out again today,” she said tersely, inspecting her forearms quickly and cringing at the grazes.

“I’m sorry,” he said, readily, without prompting. “That’s pretty up there with the most asshole things I’ve ever done.”

“You made me feel like shit.”

“I know. I didn’t—I’m sorry. I don’t have any excuse that’s good or justified.”

Valorie shuffled her feet, getting to the point where she was regretting her heels, and lifted one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug.

“I’d like to make the rest of your birthday better,” Nate said, visibly shrinking in and making himself smaller and less intimidating. “If you’ll let me.”

“I really don’t feel like I should forgive you, you know?” she huffed, throwing her hands in the air.

“Okay, that’s fair. I can go home.”

She sighed, “No, I don’t want you to go home. I—I’m really happy you’re here even if you weren’t before.”

The corner of Nate’s mouth lifted tentatively, “Yeah?”

Valorie nodded, and broke the rest of the tension between them by stepping into his space and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. She relaxed into him, at the feel of his arms around her and the smell of his cologne filling her head. It was going to warrant a conversation, she knew that, but if she could enjoy the rest of her night she would do just that.

She led him back into the bar by the hand, having already been subjected to a brief twirl as Nate told her how good she looked, much happier and lighter than she had been when she’d walked outside.

Valorie, never one to be held down by a hangover, woke bright and early the next morning. Nate was still dead to the world beside her, a pillow pulled over his head to block out whatever noises he’d heard that she hadn’t.

It was bright outside when she left his room with her clothes bundled in her arms, unable to lie there and wait for him to stir, though the clock near the staircase told her it wasn’t even seven.

She had a quick shower—the hot water tap barely turned—and changed before she went in search of her bag, keys and phone and left a note on the kitchen counter for Nate that she was heading out but wouldn’t be long.

The roses had never left her mind, not with the weirdness they’d caused, and seeing them standing tall and proud on the kitchen counter made her know that she was making the right decision.

She wrote another note, tucking it into the flowers and made her way to her parents’ house to leave the roses and the note on their doorstep.

Mom, I think you can take better care of these than I can. Love you xxx

The round trip didn’t take overly long, so Nate wasn’t moving about the house when Valorie returned. She made herself a coffee and sat on the balcony, the caffeine working in combination with the slight breeze to keep any hangover symptoms at bay.

“Where are the roses?” Nate asked, startling Valorie when she hadn’t even heard the door slide open.

She waited until Nate was sitting sidewards on the recliner beside her before she said slowly, “With my mom. She loves roses.”

“You didn’t have to get rid of them.”

“I’m not attached to them… They were clearly making you uncomfortable, so it’s fine.”

Nate hummed, then said softly, “Thank you.”

Valorie smiled at him, grateful for the admission no matter how vague. She stood up, only to sit back down on Nate’s recliner after moving him so she could sit between his legs and relax back into him. She reached for his hands and wrapped his arms around her body.

She didn’t expect him to say anything else, happy to push the conversation they had to have to later in the day and just enjoy a quiet morning. Nate didn’t have the same desire, though.

“A guy doesn’t just send you roses on your birthday if he’s not trying to get you back.” He was speaking into her hair and if he hadn’t been so close Valorie wouldn’t have heard him at all.

She squeezed his arms and said, “If I was going back to him, I would have any of the half dozen times he’s already asked.”

She hadn’t mentioned it to Nate—to anyone—that Nick was sending things to her parents house, not many, but enough that she’d had to call him to put her foot down. The earrings he’d sent that matched the bracelet she’d been wearing the first time she’d seen Nate back in Nova Scotia were the final straw there. She’d never worn them and hadn’t put the bracelet back on, even though it was her favourite piece of jewellery.

Nate’s hesitation was evidence enough of his worry and was only amplified by the way he was holding her close and still speaking into her hair. “He’s not wearing you down?”

“Not in a good way. He seems to think that if he throws more money at me and reminds me of the life we had together and the future we could have; that I’ll just forget that I want kids.”

“Promise?”

“Remember that conversation we had? After the Cup Day? It’s you and me. I’m not going back to him.”

Nate’s forehead came to rest against the back of her head; Valorie could feel his relieved sigh.

The summer was dangerously close to ending. Valorie was counting down the days until she and Nate got on a plane to Denver, excitement and trepidation filling every ounce of her body and only getting more and more intense whenever she saw him.

There was something on her mind, though, the cause of the trepidation. A question she’d been holding onto for far longer than she intended and a question she knew she needed to ask before they left for their new life together—it couldn’t be another conversation that happened after the fallout.

Nate had just finished up his last training session with Andy, and Valorie smiled at him and only briefly cringed when he leant down to kiss her despite the sweat rolling off his body.

Andy followed Nate in, greeting her happily, none the wiser to her inner turmoil—though how could Andy be if Nate didn’t have a clue? He said goodbye to Valorie, that he’d see her when Nate was back in Canada, and she waved at him as he left.

She sat on the couch, staring blankly at the television, and listened to the shower in Nate’s ensuite turn on. With a quick inhale and in an unexpected moment of courage, she decided to join him.

“What a surprise,” Nate smirked, watching Valorie drop her clothes as she entered the bathroom.

The water was nearly unbearably hot though she didn’t falter, immediately wrapping her arms around Nate. He followed suit without missing a beat and Valorie relished in being able to rest her head against his chest and hear his steady heartbeat over the water.

“What’s brought this on?”

“You did an interview a few years ago and I can’t forget it,” Valorie said, taking a deep breath. She was thankful that the shower was hiding the wetness in her voice. “That you don’t like kids? And I—I need to know if that’s still true before… I don’t know.”

“I was never sure about having kids, I’ll be honest,” Nate said, slow, measured, and most definitely confused. “But I always knew that if I was going to have kids it was only going to be with you.”

“Okay. That’s—okay.”

Her relief was immeasurable—she had known it was causing her a lot of inner stress but to have it roll off her shoulders was nicer than she ever could have imagined.

“I love you.”

Valorie pulled away from Nate’s chest, blinking through the fall of water over her face, another sigh leaving her body. She pressed up on her toes to kiss him, unable to express herself in any other way.

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[nylwnder]

i love you, grumpy | cale makar

gif by gabelandeskog

a/n: this a special fic for @gravestrain as part of @antoineroussel ’s winter fic exchange 2k23!!! sorry for the delay, apparently life had more planned for me than i would have liked, but better late than never! i must say i’ve never written the grumpy/sunshine trope before nor had i written for cale yet, so this was a really fun challenge for me! i hope you like it, elle!!! enjoy bb, hugs and kisses <333333

warnings: sunshine!cale x grumpy!reader, when the grumpy breaks >>, some swearing, just fluffy

word count: 3.1k

you couldn’t help but gain a great attachment with the small, kind and rosy boy in your kindergarten class. you were very socially anxious, which is valid considering you were being forced to submerge yourself in just the beginning of an insanely toxic social structure. and for what?

he made everything better. he was so sweet with you, it’s safe to say even too sweet. he almost always focused his attention on you, and you never understood why. when you felt like you didn’t belong anywhere, he would quite literally grab your hand and drag you everywhere with him. you always wondered why he wasn’t like all the other stupid boys playing soccer and bothering the other girls. why he always, at any opportunity, chose to spend every minute of his time with you. he invaded your space everyday with his blaring sunshine personality and even if you bothered him whenever you could, you knew you needed him.

so you and cale grew up together, and you two were always learning every possible thing there is to know about each other. that also meant that you two were going everywhere and experiencing everything together. you could list every single shitty thing that's happened to you so far throughout your life, but then you can also list everything cale has done to help you through it. and it goes both ways. cale often shares his gratitude for your ability to take him out of stupid situations, or help avoid them all together. he can be quite naive sometimes, which always makes you feel the need to defend him because you couldn’t possibly see him not have that fluffy ass smile plastered on his face.

he has come to know you aren’t necessarily the most exuberant person, which is also supposedly a reason for your incapability of keeping relationships (per a handful of stupid assholes). but cale, unlike the others, never minded. he always told you how he loves the way he can break you. since he has, making his favourite sight in the whole world: a smile creeping up on the end of your lips — it’s absolutely picture perfect if he miraculously gets a giggle too. if you must say so, nobody has had a higher “breaking y/n count” than cale himself. he just adds it to all of his other impeccable stats.

once cale left for umass, it was embarrassingly obvious how you began spiralling, and it presented you with an epiphany. the main point: you are a complete simp for him and it’s honestly disgusting. you can’t even say the exact day you fell in love with him, because there wasn’t a day that you didn’t. so in conclusion, cale is the only person you need by your side, because you are entirely positive you would go insane if otherwise. even if you sometimes act like that’s not the case.

so you drove to massachusetts one day to go visit him. that night, you two headed to a campus party where cale ended up quaffing far too many drinks. dragging his mumbley ass to his room, he slumped down and laid half on the bed and half on the floor. you gave out a small laugh, not without rolling your eyes, as he was trying his very best to tell you a story he could barely make out.

that was until he started muttering things about you. you stopped fixing his room and sat on the floor beside him. he turned to look at you, his head dangling off the bed now. “i wanna tell you sm’thing” you nodded, “what does your blabbermouth wanna tell me now?”

he giggled, before he spat out everything he wanted to say, all at once. telling you how he can’t get you out of his mind, how he misses someone waiting for him after games and practices, or the way you make fun of him, and your laugh, “oh that fuckin laugh you have it kills me y/n, in the best way.”

“i think the blood is rushing to your head.” you said, almost instinctively and you didn’t know why. your self-sabotage started to seep in, and you hated how you always made yourself feel as if you aren’t worthy for someone like cale to reciprocate your feelings.

but you were so grateful for his slurred confessions, as it eased your worries of looking like a total fool when you end up telling him what you came to say. he stared looking at you, waiting for your reaction. “do you hate me now?” he asked.

“no.”

“i should’ve just shut up. oh fuck no i messed it up, im s’stupid. ugh you’re always so right i'm such a dumbass. fuck-” he began mumbling, as he sat up and rubbed his face.

“cale stop.” you demanded. “you’re not stupid. you’re stupid for thinking you're stupid.”

“thanks” he said, softly. a pinky shade started to itch up on his face.

you turned to him and looked into his glossy eyes as he nipped on his lip. “okay. i miss you. i need you. i need you so much. i always knew that but i tried so hard to act like i don't. but life’s shit with you over here” you said, while you internally cursed yourself for the incoming wave of tears.

“nobody’s ever made me feel the way you make me feel. i’m not this bitchy, grumpy asshole when i’m with you. you don’t piss me off, not like you might think. no, i love you too much to think you're annoying.” you ranted.

you heard cale sniffle, as you looked up at him you saw tears falling down his face far more than yours — predictable. you laughed at him, reached for his hand and pulled him down to sit with you. “i love you, s’much” he said, as he pulled you in for a tight hug. and you loved it, feeling like you could just finally melt into him after discarding the weight off your shoulders.

cale felt the same. he thanked the far too many beers he had to give him that push. it didn’t end up going as he had rehearsed for years, but he didn’t lose you and he was so grateful about that. “it’s been a privilege that you let me accompany you through everything, all these years. i gotta say it’s something so very special to see you, you, oh you, let yourself be, you, with me. the really you.” cale told you, his head buried in your hair. you smiled, he wasn’t really making sense but you understood.

just as much as he’s always understood you.

—

it’s an average frigid and snowy day in colorado, and you find yourself cuddled up on your couch, watching a show on crave. you were wrapped up in the custom made quilt your now boyfriend gave you when you were both in middle school. it might sound corny, but god it was comfortable.

the freshly decorated christmas tree lit up the dim apartment. it was already mid-december when you were semi-forced to set it up, despite the fact cale originally wanted to put it up in november. cale was in the kitchen cooking up dinner for the two of you. you could hear him humming tunes to himself, something he often did which you love cause he always made sure to remind you, you weren’t alone. even if you teased him that you appreciated his absence when he was on road trips, he knows you always missed his stupid humming or his frequent whining, and yeah even his heart warming hugs that he would always refused to end.

he walks over with the bowls of food in hand. organizing the plates on the coffee table in front of the two of you, he can finally accompany you in finishing what you were watching. not forgetting to gently kiss your temple as he sat down beside you. and you may or may not have devoured his “classic home cooked meal, made with love” faster than cale himself, which he immediately laughed about since you had earlier mentioned you weren’t “that, that hungry”.

your pleasantly snug state started to diminish when cale mumbled the plans for tomorrow. “what? absolutely not!” you quickly stated, as cale made his way back to you. his team was hosting their annual family skate, which you often tried to dodge since cale always seemed to somehow embarrass you in front of everyone with your lack of skating abilities. and now, the catch this year? it would be in a huge outdoor rink.

“oh come on, everyone’s gonna go. it’s gonna be adorably decorated and… don’t forget you still need to learn how to actually skate,” cale says, booping your nose. “and, look, we already finished watching everything on our list, so we gotta make a whole new list and we can do that sunday.”

“no. no, look how cold it is outside! and i don’t recall being chilly in the cozy comfort of my own home.”

you fall back when cale tries to reach his hands out to grab yours. “i’ll give you the warmest hoodie i have so you can add it on top of the 50 layers you already habitually put on. i promise, baby ” cale reasons, as you try to fight him off so he couldn’t pull you up. you shoot him a look as he pouts at you, “you love hot chocolate, with whip cream. and i’ll make sure they have marshmallows too, of course.” he continued trying to convince you along with his sweet smile.

rolling your eyes at him. “fine.”

“fine? yes? perfect! oh honey, you’ll have fun, i promise. don’t worry baby.” he says, pulling you into his chest and kissing you everywhere. you scrunched up your face, trying to move the opposite way of his attacking lips. “you let me fall, makar?” you say, sternly pointing him down and giving him a warning look. he throws his arms up, his cheeks beginning to blush naturally, “i won’t, i won’t. never would. you know that.” you scoffed, “you better say that.”

as you made your way to grab some juice, cale sneaked up behind you. “wanna go to costco?” cale suggests enthusiastically, before snuggling his nose into the crook of your neck while wrapping his arms around your waist. you shook your head, “cale, you do know you’re literally the only one that loves going there. not me.”

“lies, you love their selection of snacks and you always eat allllllll the ones i buy. if you didn’t love costco, you wouldn’t eat their — well priced — stuff either.”

“i still prefer sam’s club” you unhesitatingly denote.

cale gasps, dramatically holding his chest as you look up at him. you moved your head down to pour the juice into a cup, and you couldn’t help but break into a tiny smile. he was such a kid.

“y/n, take that back” he whiningly utters. you walked to him, mockingly booping his nose “no”

but you couldn’t hold the smirk back, and cale knew you were just teasing, like always. even if you did hate going to costco, especially because of the impeccably large crowds and the fact that the promoted samples never seem to actually be ready to grab, cale loved it. and you know you always want cale to be happy.

—

the following day, you did not hesitate to grab the hoodie cale mentioned you could use from his closet. as you stand in the mirror, what’s accompanying the sweater and your puffer jacket, is a “heat tech” t-shirt, a thick long sleeve, some long johns below your fleece sweats and your long and fat scarf wrapped around your neck. you also quickly yanked cale’s favourite beanie from his drawer which was a compromise he was willing to make despite having to dig for another hat to wear.

cale couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of you struggling to put your thick boots on with your million layers. “i don't have to put them on, you know.” you taunted him. “no i’m sorry, i’m sorry. let me help you, here” he said, as he got on his knees to loosen the laces on each of the boots.

when he held one out for you, you snickered. “what? what happened?” he asked innocently, looking up at you. “i like it when you’re on your knees. specifically for me.” you say, running your hands through his hair and tugging just a bit. his reaction was predictable, his cheeks immediately turning flush as he cleared his throat and proceeded to tie your laces back together. you often take much enjoyment in getting him all flustered with your suggestive comments. he just looks really cute.

—

once you arrived at the outdoor rink, you found out it actually wasn’t as cold as you made it seem, but you weren’t going to let cale use that against you so you stayed with every layer you had put on. even if a part of you admits that you admire his cheeky smile whenever he knows he’s right.

before heading towards the ice, cale asks you if you want some hot chocolate first, as you noticed many other couples were heading to the little hut. you said you were fine, preferring the idea of smudging whip cream on his face after skating just in case he does end up dropping you.

sitting on the bench, cale helped you put on your skates before his. a few of his teammates were happy to see you. ej had a mischievous grin on his face as he greeted you. “just let me know when you wanna gang up on your boy.” he whispers in your ear, making you smirk and nod. ej was a gem, he always liked how you would affectionately bug cale. and he was always ready to help you.

“you better look like a stanley cup champion out there.” you tell cale as he grabs your hand. he laughed, “oh i will!”

gripping on his forearms, you finally step onto the ice trying to not immediately slip. cale starts skating backwards, as he lightly pulls you in to follow him, in which you do at a seemingly better rate than the first time he took you to a rink. continuing with the movements, and gaining more confidence on the ice, you mimicked some of cale’s skate tricks seeing where it would take you. you simper as you learned how to take a long stride and break on your own with a ‘t-stop’. and then again but with a ‘plow stop’. though, cale catching you before you could fall.

“see, you are having fun.” cale mentions as he smiles, turning to skate beside you again. “yeah yeah. whatever. i mean it’s more fun when you don’t fall.”

doing laps around the rink, you catch ej looking over at the two of you. so you tilt your head, signalling he could start to fool around. but before he could even make his way over to you or cale, your skate gets caught on a dent in the ice making you swing your arms, sending cale falling back.

he fell on his back, his head didn’t touch the ice — but you didn’t know that. “oww” he whines. you turn to him, softly chuckling at the sight of his sprawled out body. but then he closed his eyes, and held his hand to his head, groaning. “oh shit, cale!” you yelp, falling to your knees to look at him. “did you hit your head?? fuck i told you they should give out helmets here.”

“mm god my head is pounding.” he mumbles, trying to get up. “don’t get up, you could have a concussion. you should know that.” you tell him. he groans once again so you start to internally panic. you just pushed, and potentially injured, your boyfriend who has to go back and play in a couple of days. “shit. cale don’t die. fuck don’t die you have a game in four days and i can’t have your coach hating me for this.”

nate comes around, “hey cale, you okay?” he asks. cale doesn’t move, nor says a thing. you shake his arm, and nothing. “cale!!” you call out. he’s limp.

“oh god i killed him, nate. fuck i’m screwed. no cale wake up. please wake up. come on you rosy cheeked sunshine boy. fucking get uuuuup.” you whine at him, shaking his entire body as much as you can.

“BOO” cale yells, jolting up and grabbing you. you let out a tiny shriek, scrunching your shoulders and closing your eyes. he was in a fit of giggles. “CALE DOUGLAS MAKAR NEVER FUCKING DO THAT.” you cry out.

“i got youuuu” he mocks. you smack his shoulder, not as gently. he smiles, “it’s cute that you thought i died.”

“that’s not funny. i thought you smacked your head.”

“it’s kinda funny.”

“no it’s not.”

pulling him up, everyone else laughed at you two. ej truly surprised cale turned the tables on you. nate patted cale’s back before you started heading over to go get hot chocolate.

“two please.” cale orders before shaking off the snow on his pants. the lady hands you both your cups and you head over to the bench. “so you didn’t hit your head?” you asked cale quietly, looking at him with soft eyes. he smiled, “no, and you didn’t see so i took advantage.” you sneer at him.

as cale blew his hot chocolate, you scooped a bit of the whip cream and hid your hand. “hey, it’s pretty h-” cale began saying before you took a small sip and acted like you burned your tongue. you whimpered in pain, shutting your mouth. “hot it’s pretty hot. are you okay?” he asks, wrapping his arm around you to pull you closer.

that’s when you lifted your hand and smeared the whip cream all over his face, cale gasped. “y/n!!” he exclaimed, wiping off what fell on his eyes. you started laughing at him.

“how dare you. i didn’t even let you fall”

“it’s funny.”

he laughed, despite the way he was still cleaning his face. “it is funny.”

“glad you think so.”

he grabs your cup and moves it behind him with his own, “that’s enough for you.” you still had a smile on your face. he moves his finger and dabs a bit of whip cream from his face onto yours. so you grab his blushy cheeks and pull him in for a kiss. his lips were warm and soft and you couldn’t help but feel all lovesick inside. “i love you” you murmured. “i love you more, grumpy”

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[barkbarkbeauvillier]

i won't say (i'm in love)

pairing: jamie oleksiak x reader

genre: fluff

warnings: sickness, swearing, vince dunn is an asshole,

summary: 4+1. the four times everyone else knew you and jamie liked each other and the one time you both figured it out yourselves

word count: 2.8k

a/n: 1. shoutout to my bestfriend for the title (i was shook). 2. this was written for @antoineroussel winter fic exchange. My giftee is @jxmieoleksiaks it was an honor to get to write for you! I hope you enjoy the fic!

[1.]

Your best friend pointed it out first. 

Jamie was going home for Christmas. You were bummed when he first told you he’d be back in Canada for the break, but you knew not all of your friends could stick around for the holidays. Not everyone in your life was born and raised in Seattle, unfortunately. 

“You’ll be at the game on the 22nd right?” he asked. 

“Don’t I come to all the home games?” You teased. You were a season ticket holder after all.

When Seattle got a hockey team, you were quick to snatch up season tickets thankful to finally have a professional team in your hometown. You never thought you’d end up friends with one of the players–actually multiple players thanks to Jamie dragging you to just about every Kraken function in the last three years. At the beginning of this season, Jamie insisted he give you one of his free tickets to the home games so that you wouldn’t have to pay for tickets, but you declined. 

“Do you think you could take me to the airport after?”

A frown tugged at the corners of your lips. Because, no you really didn’t want to take him to the airport. You wanted your best friend to stay in Seattle with you for the holidays.

“Sure Jame,” you answered. 

“You’re the best,” Jamie sighed. “Do you wanna hang out tomorrow?”

The team had just gotten back from a roadie. You were settling into bed when Jamie called, him doing the same. You hadn’t seen him for a week. You did text every day, and you facetimed once after a rough game. He also called you twice, once because he was bored on his day off and the other one because you got off work late and wanted to be on the phone with someone while you walked from your office to your car. 

“Yes! I work in the morning, but my evening is free.”

“We’ve got optional morning practice so I’ll probably go to that tomorrow. Come over after work?”

Not that anyone could see, but you had the biggest grin on your face. “Sounds like a plan.”

Almost immediately after hanging up with Jamie, one of your girlfriends called. You’d been promising to hang out with her for the last two weeks but neither of your schedules had lined up.

“Ok we need to do something before Christmas. Give me the days you’re free.”

“Tonight and the 23rd,” you answered her.

“Dammit!” She swore. “I’m free tomorrow and the 22nd.” 

“Jamie and I just planned to hang out tomorrow. And by just planned I mean literally I got off the phone with him not even a minute before you called.”

“Ugh,” she grunted. “Fuck him. Oh wait… you’re trying to right?”

You giggled nervously. “Shut up.”

“You’re probably hanging out with him on the 22nd too huh?”

“There’s a game that night and then I’m taking him to the airport after.”

“Oooh taking him to the airport… that’s a big step Y/N.”

Even though she couldn’t see you, you rolled your eyes at her. “I’ve taken him to the airport multiple times.”

“Yeah you suckered yourself into being his ride. It starts with just one quick offer and then pretty soon it’s just a given that you’ll be taking them.” 

“And then they leave you two years later for their intern?” It was a low blow but you didn’t mean it in a hurtful manner, nor did she take it that way. She’d gone through the grieving process of her last boyfriend dumping her and immediately getting with his intern and now you were able to joke about what an asshole he was.

“Exactly!”

“Good thing me and Jamie aren’t dating then,” you added.

“You could be though. It’s pretty obvious you two like each other as more than just friends.”

You decided to change the subject. “What are you doing on the 24th?”

[2.]

Penny pointed it out next.

Jamie’s family was at the game. You recognized Penny almost instantly, it’s not every day a multiple Olympic medalist goes to a Seattle Kraken game– that and you’d been with Jamie on a few occasions when he’d FaceTimed her. It took you a minute to recognize his parents, but you’d seen photos of them at Jamie’s place and on his phone and figured the two people walking with Penny had to be them.

You didn’t hesitate to introduce yourself when Penny joined you at the glass, likely waiting for the team to come out for warmups.

“You’re Jamie’s sister right?” You asked. You held your hand out, giving her a big smile. “I’m Y/N. Jamie’s best friend.”

“I thought you looked familiar,” she said and shook your hand. “Nice jersey. I’m sure it gives Jame an ego boost to see you in it,” she teased.

“He won’t let me wear anyone else’s number. Says it goes against the best friend code.”

Penny rolled her eyes with a laugh.

“So, what are you doing here? Jamie said he was going home for Christmas.”

“We wanted to surprise him. He comes home every year. It’s about time we go to him.”

“Hey Pen.” Jamie’s mom had met you both at the glass, smiling at you the whole time. 

“Hey mom. This is Y/N,” Penny introduced for you.

You swore his mom’s smile got bigger. “We’ve heard a lot about you. Jamie’s so grateful for your friendship. I’m Allison.” She stuck her hand out and you shook it.

“Jamie’s gonna be so excited to see you guys.”

And he was. When Jamie saw the four of you at the glass during warmups, his smile grew ten times its original size.

“Hey, come find us after the game, ok? We’re gonna hang out and wait for Jame and you should stay and hang out too.” Penny asked, just as they were all about to make their way back to their seats as the game was about to start.

“I will. I’m technically his ride anyway,” You laughed. “I was supposed to take him to the airport tonight.” 

When you’d met up with everyone after the game, Jamie insisted you come back to his place with him and hang out even longer. And you couldn’t tell him no when he practically begged you to come over. 

After their parents went to bed, Jamie suggested a movie night with you and Penny. Except thirty minutes into the movie he laid his head down on you like he did during most movie nights and it wasn’t long before he had fallen asleep.

“You can’t tell him I told you this but he totally has a thing for you,” Penny spilled suddenly.

You couldn’t help but smile. “You think so?” you asked, glancing down at the man in question asleep with his head on your lap.

“I don’t just think, I know so. You should give it a shot.”

Your cheeks felt warm at her words. Jamie was your best friend, but of course you always wondered if there was something more there. There was for you, but you never wanted to put your friendship in jeopardy by admitting it. 

“I know you like him too,” Penny added. 

And maybe she was right.

[3.]

Schultzy nagged Jamie about it for weeks. 

“Come on man,” Schultz groaned, eyeing you across the room. “You mean to tell me you haven’t hit that once?”

They were all at the new years team party. You were busy chatting with a few of the girlfriends that had come tonight. Jamie figured you must’ve just been complimented on your outfit tonight as you had glanced down at yourself and turned side to side just slightly, showing off more of the attire.

Jamie shook his head. “And don’t say it like that. Have some respect, man,” Jamie scolded.

Justin put his hands up. “Sorry.”

“So can I hit that?” Vince teased.

Jamie glared at him. “No. And not because I like her, but because she deserves better than some horny hockey guy.”

“It was a joke,” he defended.

“It wasn’t funny.”

Vince nodded his head. “Sorry. You’re right.”

“And you’re positive you don’t like her?” Justin asked. 

“We’re just friends,” Jamie swore. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you though, and the guys he was sitting with caught on.

— —

It was the same during warmups when Jamie had caught your eye. You hardly ever missed warmies during home games and it had now become part of Jamie’s routine to skate by you and place his hand on the glass, you doing the same. It started as a high five, but your hands began lingering longer and longer each time.

“If you don’t like her, why do you always look at her with those lovey dovey eyes?” Schultz chirped, giving Jamie a slight check when he had skated away from you.

“I don’t,” Jamie defended.

Schultz rolled his eyes.

“I don’t!” Jamie yelled after Justin as he skated off.

— —

“Hey, drinks at my place tonight.” Brandon caught Jamie just as he was leaving the rink. 

“Sorry man. I can’t tonight. Y/N’s got car troubles.”

Jamie was on his way to pick you up. You’d had a bad day at work, but the icing on the cake was that your car wouldn’t start so you were stranded there. You called him in a fit just shortly after he’d gotten to the locker room.

“Ditching us for Y/N again?” Schultz asked, throwing his arm around Jamie’s shoulder. “You’re sure you don’t like her?” 

Jamie rolled his eyes. “Let it go.”

“Dude, you’re ditching out on guys night for her. It’s pretty obvious you like her as more than just a friend.”

“She had a bad day, man. I’d do the same for you if you had a bad day. If you were having car troubles, I’d come jump ya, or pick you up.”

Schultz snorted. “Yeah ok. Even if that was true, you gotta admit that it’s different with her.”

And Jamie didn’t want to admit it, but he knew that was true.

[4.]

It was Jamie’s mom who actually got him thinking about it though. Of course it had crossed his mind multiple times and he always felt some pang of guilt when he told his friends he didn’t like you like that. He felt jealous when guys would flirt with you, extra jealous if it was guys on his team. 

Whenever you two were alone, he sometimes wondered if there was something more there than just friends. He tried not to let the thought overwhelm him though.

“So, why do you want my soup recipe again?” Allison asked.

“Y/N is sick. I was gonna make it for her and bring it over.”

“Are you two dating yet?”

“No,” Jamie laughed. “No, Ma. Just friends.”

“Your dad says you look at her the way he looks at me.”

Jamie smiled to himself. “She’s my best friend though. What if I go for it and it doesn’t work out? I don’t want to risk our friendship.”

“What if you go for it, and it works out better than you ever expected?” she countered.

“So that soup recipe?” Jamie changed the subject.

Allison wouldn’t let him. “How many of your friends would make you homemade chicken soup when you’re not feeling well?”

“Y/N would,” Jamie answered quickly. “Oh.” He realized then what his mom was hinting at. Maybe there was something there. Something more.

“It’s obvious to everyone else, but oblivious to you two,” Allison laughed. “Alright. You got a pen ready to write this down?”

When his mom has finished repeating the recipe, Jamie brought up something he never thought he’d ask, or at least didn’t think he’d ask so soon. “Hey Ma… when did you know that you were falling for dad?” 

— —

[+1.]

The knock startled you. Even though you weren’t expecting anyone, you knew who it was before you even opened the door.

“Hey,” you rasped.

“Hey,” Jamie greeted with a smile. “Brought ya somethin’” he said, holding out the large container. “Made it this afternoon. It’s my mom’s recipe.”

You tried to get out a thank you, but started coughing before you could. You turned away from Jamie, coughing into your elbow. Your chest hurt, your head ached, being sick was absolutely the worst.

“You don’t have to stay,” you said when Jamie closed the door behind him and toed his shoes off. 

“I want to.”

“I don’t want to get you sick.”

“I’m not worried about that.”

You laid down on the couch, pulling your blanket over you. You’d spent most of your day in the same position you were currently in, that was after you had slept until almost 2pm. 

“Are you hungry? I can warm up some soup for you,” Jamie asked. He frowned at you in your miserable state. His heart ached.

“Ok,” you said. “But only if you eat some too.” 

“Deal,” Jamie chuckled. “I’ll be in the kitchen.”

“I’ll be here.” You tried to smile at him, but couldn’t muster up much. Damn flu. 

Five minutes later he was back with two bowls of warmed soup. 

You groaned as you sat up. Your whole body ached and from nothing in particular, just the flu bug you’d caught that had run rampant through you. You wrapped the blanket around your shoulders, but still shivered. You’d had a hard time staying warm all day, although the fever would beg to differ.

Jamie placed both bowls on the coffee table and then sat down beside you.

“Seriously, Jame. As much as I want you here, the team will kill me if you get sick.”

Jamie chuckled. “Nah. They’ll kill me for being careless and irresponsible.”

“Exactly! And I like you alive. I don’t know how I’d function with you dead.”

“I’m not gonna get sick. Eat your soup.”

“You’re so demanding,” you teased, rolling your eyes at him.

Jamie handed you the bowl when you were all situated. You hummed around the first bite; the hot broth soothed your sore throat and warmed you right up. And the taste was delicious. You could tell it was his mom’s recipe as it felt like home with every bite you took.

“Wanna watch a movie?” You suggested. Jamie wasn’t going to leave—you didn’t exactly want him to anyway— so you might as well make the most of him being there. 

“Sure. Is it still my turn to pick or do you get to this time since you’re sick?” You could never come to an agreement on who picked the movie whenever you’d hung out so you made a deal to just switch off every time. It worked a lot better than anything else you’d tried—which included everything from rock paper scissors to whoever’s house you were at.

“Rules are rules. You pick.”

You grabbed another blanket from your bedroom as Jamie found a movie to watch. You laid down with your head on the armrest and Jamie sat roughly in the middle, letting you rest your legs across his lap. You had one blanket to yourself but shared the second one you’d brought out and you both settled in for the show.

You were nearly asleep when Jamie cleared his throat. You turned to look at him just as he asked, “Hey, do you ever think of us as more than just friends?” 

He hoped you couldn’t feel the way he was physically shaking as he asked the question. Little did you know that he’d tried to ask it about a million times since coming over. He’d played it over and over in his head, what words he was going to use, how to phrase it, when the perfect moment to ask it would be, how you would respond, if you felt the same way, and if this would change everything for you both. So yeah, he was shaking and terrified.

But to his surprise, you seemed totally calm as you responded. “Often, yeah. Do you?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “You know other people think of us that way too? Like they think we should be a couple ya know.”

You laughed softly. “Yeah, I know.”

“How come you’ve never brought it up?”

You sat up from the couch, your legs still thrown across Jamie’s lap. “Truthfully, I didn’t think you liked me as more than a friend. Well, until Penny brought it up when she was here for Christmas, that you did like me more than that. Since then I’ve wanted to ask but just been too nervous to I guess,” you shrugged.

Jamie nodded, taking a few seconds to process your words. “So do you like me more than just a friend?” 

He was suddenly so shy. You couldn’t help but smile.

“Yes, Jame. I have for a while.”

Jamie smiled too. “Y/N, when you’re feeling better, will you go on a date with me?” 

“I would love to.”

His smile only got bigger. “You have no idea how bad I wanna kiss you right now. But I’m not going to because I know you won’t let me, because you’re sick.” 

You laughed. “You’re exactly right. That too is just going to have to wait until I’m feeling better.”

[wildrangers]

Home // Elias Pettersson

Word Count: 3.1K

Summary: This is my submission for the lovely @ryngrvs in The Winter Fic Exchange 2k23, organized by the wonderful @antoineroussel! It’s an established relationship with lots of fluff so I hope everyone enjoys ☺️

Warnings: cursing

“Holy shit, you’re going to lap me soon!”

“Oh, fuck off, Elias” you grumbled as your boyfriend skated past again. His laugh trailed behind him as continued his laps around the rink. You sighed, watching his effortless glides as you desperately tried to stay upright without grasping onto the boards. A month from now, the Canucks were hosting their annual Friends and Family Skate Day and you were deathly afraid you were going to embarrass yourself by wiping out on the ice.

While Elias had been skating basically since he could walk, no one in your family knew how so you were learning now as an adult. You knew you physically could do it but you didn’t have the benefit of being a carefree kid, unafraid of a scraped elbow or twisted ankle—you were acutely aware of the many ways you could accidentally hurt yourself on the ice.

“Need a boost?” Elias called as he approached from behind and you threw your arms out in response. A moment later, you felt your boyfriend’s hands latch onto your waist. “This is the one, I can feel it” he murmured, placing a quick kiss to your ear before carefully pushing you forward for some much-needed momentum.

You took a deep breath, keeping all of Elias’ tips in mind as you moved your legs. You felt giddy as you skated across the length of the ice before grasping onto the corner boards. “I did it!” you called and Elias whooped before stopping in front of you.

“At this rate, you may not embarrass yourself after all” Elias teased and, without thinking, you lurched forward to give him a playful shove.

“Maybe I should ask Brock to train me, he’s way nicer than you” you retorted, pressing your hands into his chest to push him away. A moment later, you realized you’d skated quite a few feet as you moved him away from you after his sarcastic barb. “You asshole, you goaded me into skating without psyching myself out.”

“And it worked, didn’t it?” he smirked, gesturing to how far away you were from the boards. “Also, Boeser is too nice, he’d just coddle you. You wouldn’t learn in time.”

“Wow, it’s almost like you know me or something” you joked, matching Elias’ strides as he kept himself just out of your reach.

“I guess dating someone for almost a year can do that” he agreed, eyes studying your form. “You’re still too tense, älskling, loosen up your knees a bit.”

You did as instructed, surprised and relieved to feel the pressure on your ankles let up slightly as you corrected your stance. “You just don’t want me to demand a foot rub like last time, huh?”

“No, I don’t want you in pain for three days again” he corrected, though you doubted his intentions were entirely pure. “Now, remember, the corners can be tricky but you just have to let your body move with your feet, not fight them. And no knee locking again.”

You nodded, your brows furrowing in concentration as you tried to mimic his movements. You had nearly cleared the corner when you felt your heart skip a beat as your torso naturally came closer to the ice’s surface. You immediately tried to tilt the opposite way to give yourself some distance but that only resulted in you flailing and falling onto your ass. “Fucking hell!” you groaned, laying your head back on the ice and closing your eyes.

You felt Elias settle beside you as his hand gripped yours. “You got to let go and trust your core muscles” he corrected gently.

“I know” you sighed. “But I hate feeling off balance like that.”

“You’re not off balance, you’re actually perfectly stable until you panic and then you lose your balance” he noted as he laid down next to you. You two lay in silence for a few moments as you caught your breath and felt your heart rate return to normal. When you finally opened your eyes to face Elias, he was already studying you intently.

“What?” you questioned softly, meeting his gaze.

“Just admiring the view” he replied quietly, gently brushing the loose strands of hair out of your face.

“Flatterer” you accused even as you felt butterflies rush into your stomach. “What are you really thinking?”

“That I’m lucky to have a partner who cares enough about me to teach themselves how to skate even though it kind of scares the shit of out of them.”

“And I’m lucky to have a boyfriend with enough patience to teach me even though you can occasionally be a bit cranky about it” you grinned, causing him to roll his eyes.

“I’m sorry I lost my patience watching you cling to the boards and refuse to move for half an hour our first time out here” he retorted drawing a loud laugh from you.

“I know, I know, I just couldn’t help myself” you responded, lifting your linked hands to place a kiss to his. “Can we please go back to one of our places now?”

“Only if you can make your way over to the exit on your own. We need to end on a good note, yeah?”

You begrudgingly nodded and Elias got up to help you to your feet. As you readied yourself to skate back across the ice, he wrapped you in a tight embrace, resting his chin on the top of your head. You smiled into his chest, holding him close and stealing some of his eternal warmth.

“I’m proud of you, sweet pea” he mumbled into your hair and you pulled away just enough to place a quick kiss to his lips.

“Thank you, sweetie pie” you replied. “But let’s move this indoors, yeah? I’d like to feel my toes again.” Elias chuckled and nodded before making his way over to the exit to wait for you. You took a deep breath, loosening your knees as you pushed off and easily made your way over to him.

***

“Oh my god, Bela!” Elias groaned, eyes glued to the TV. It was a few hours later and he knew you were feeling much better after eating some takeout and curling up beneath a blanket.

“I thought you didn’t like this show” you teased from beside him. He didn’t need to glance over to know you were smirking, quite proud of yourself for finally getting him hooked on Sex Lives of College Girls.

“I don’t” he stubbornly responded. “I just think she’s doing stupid shit this season.”

“Mhm” you replied knowingly. He finally paused the TV to turn and face you, noting the amused quirk of your lips.

“I’m sorry, did you want me to stop massaging your sore ankles?” he asked, pausing his movements to raise his eyebrows at you.

“You’re no fun at all, just admit I was right and you like the show” you said, matching his stubbornness. Elias sighed, taking in the determined glint in your eye that he knew meant you weren’t going to let up, even with his empty threats.

“Fine, I’m invested in these girls’ lives and the stupid shit they get themselves into” he grumbled, loathe to prove you right but knowing you’d won this round. He was rewarded with a broad grin as you leaned up and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a deep kiss.

As much as your relationship was filled with teasing and sarcasm, it was equally grounding and comforting. Whenever Elias had a tough game, which was happening plenty this season, he knew he could call or stop by and you would know just what to say to calm him down. With every passing day together, you were becoming his home and he hoped you felt the same way.

As you pulled away, he wrapped his arms around your waist to keep you close, resting his forehead against yours. “I love you” he said quietly, not wanting to break the peace of this moment.

“And I love you” you responded “…especially when you admit I’m right.”

“Oh my god, Y/N!” he laughed, jokingly pushing you away as you cackled at his annoyance. He released a deep breath, shaking his head, as he pressed play and resumed massaging your tired ankles.

***

A few days later, you were curled up in bed totally lost in your book. You jumped slightly at the loud knocking coming from your front door, brows creasing together in confusion. You weren’t expecting anyone and the nightstand clock said it was just shy of 11PM. You got out of bed, padding to the door and peeking through the hole, only to see a frustrated looking Elias on the other side.  

“Baby?” you questioned taking in his exhausted features as you unlocked the door.

“I’m sorry, I tried calling and texting but you weren’t answering and I just, I needed to see you” he rushed out in a burst, his accent thicker than normal which was a dead giveaway he was upset.

“You don’t need to be sorry, what happened? Are you okay?” you questioned, ushering him inside.

“I’m just so frustrated and tired of this fucking season” he sighed, tossing his bag to the side and plopping down onto your couch. He cradled his head in his hands as you sat beside him, giving him a moment to gather his thoughts. “It’s like we’ll have a couple of games where things click and then everything goes to shit and the locker room is so fucking tense and it just sucks.”

“Come here” you replied quietly, gently pulling his hands away from his face and pulling him to you. He buried his face in your neck, wrapping his arms around you tightly. You rubbed his back with one hand while the other brushed through his hair in soothing patterns.

You two sat in comfortable silence as his shoulders slowly but surely loosened and his body finally fully relaxed into yours. “Have you eaten?” you questioned and he shook his head against your chest. “I’m going to put on some water for pasta, you get out of that suit and into something comfortable, yeah?”

You felt him nod and he slowly got up, placing a kiss to your forehead before trudging down to your room to change. You walked to the kitchen, finding your forgotten phone on the counter. As you waited for the pot to fill with water, you scrolled through the multiple missed FaceTime’s, calls, and texts from Elias. Each message was more frantic than the one before and your heart sank. You’d meant to have your phone with you since it was a game night but you’d lost track of time while reading.

You sighed, chastising yourself, as you placed the pot on the burner. Adrift in your thoughts, you didn’t realize Elias had returned until you felt his hands rest on your shoulders, turning you towards him.

“I’m really sorry for just showing up like this, especially so late.”

“Lias, I promise it’s okay. I’m so sorry I didn’t have my phone with me, I knew it was a game night and forgot to keep an eye on the clock…”

“And you got lost in that book of yours” he teased and you laughed, nodding.

“Yeah, that too. But I’m here now and I’m all yours” you promised, cupping his face in your hands. “I’m sorry this season is so challenging and stressful. But you can only control yourself and you’re having an amazing run, especially with all this adversity.”

He sighed sadly but nodded in agreement, “I know you’re right, it just feels so hopeless after a tough loss like tonight. And the thought of going back to my apartment alone sounded like torture.”

“Then stay here tonight” you offered and he agreed, placing a kiss to your forehead. You moved away, adding pasta to the boiling water as Elias began heating up some leftover chicken. You two moved around each other easily, slipping wordlessly into a routine you’d instinctively created together.

As Elias began eating his late dinner, you hopped up on the counter, studying your boyfriend.  You took a deep breath, sharing the thought you’d been mulling over for a month now. “What do you think about moving in together?”

Your boyfriend’s bright blue eyes shot up to meet yours, “Really?”

“Yes, really, or I wouldn’t have brought it up” you replied, nerves flooding your system at his non-answer.

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to ask you for weeks” he admitted and you felt your shoulders loosen. “Especially tonight, the whole way here I just kept thinking how much easier it would be to know that no matter how shitty my day was I’d be coming home to you.”

“Well, good thing one of us was brave enough to say something then” you teased and he rolled his eyes at you.

“Are we really doing this?” he questioned, eyes searching yours, and you nodded, smiling. He wrapped you in a tight embrace and you felt like you were already home just being in his arms.

***

“How are you feeling?” Elias asked. It was Friends and Family Skate Day and you were feeling confident given the weeks of practice you’d had.

“Good, actually, thanks to you” you admitted, bumping your hip into his making him grin down at you. “Still a little nervous about the corners but you’ll stay with me, right?”

“Of course, älskling” he promised, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead as you two reached the outdoor rink. You sat down and removed your boots as Elias unpacked his bag, taking out your skates so he could put them on for you. As Elias gently slid each of your feet in before tying them securely, you looked around, taking in the crowd. You waved at a few people you knew, your smile widening as Quinn arrived and sat next you.

“How’s the move going you two?” Quinn asked as he laced up his skates.

“Good, all my things are officially in Elias’ apartment now. Not put away yet but at least my old place is cleared out.”

“It’s not ‘Elias’ apartment’ it’s ‘our apartment’” Elias corrected, tapping your foot so you knew you were ready to go. You stood up and leaned against the boards so he could take your seat to get himself ready.

“Yes, yes our apartment, what a silly mistake for me to make” you joked, causing Elias to glare up at you while Quinn fought back a grin. “Are you able to come to the house warming party next week?”

“Yeah, can’t wait. I’ve been to Petey’s place a hundred times but now that it’s Petey and Y/N’s apartment, I’m sure it’ll blow me away” he replied and Elias shoved his friend with his shoulder.

“Very funny you two” Elias grumbled, reluctantly accustomed to you and Quinn ganging up on him.

“I’m sorry, babe, you just make it so easy to annoy you” you smiled, grabbing his hands as he rose to stand beside you. “See you out there, Huggy!”

Elias pulled you onto the ice and you skated over to Brock pulling him in to a quick hug. “How’re you doing? It’s been forever since I’ve seen you.”

“I’ve been good, you two have been crazy busy. We’ll have plenty of time to catch up at your party next week” Brock grinned at you. “Feeling good about today?”

You nodded, squeezing Elias’s hand, “Lots of training so I won’t embarrass myself too much.”

“Stop being modest, you’re going to be great” Elias corrected.

“This guy has really softened up since you two decided to move in together” Brock teased and you fought back a grin as Elias’ face flushed red.

“Drop it Brock, Quinner was already razzing him before we even got on the ice. If you two keep this up, he’ll uninvite you from the party” you threatened jokingly. Brock raised his hands in mock surrender before skating off to say hi to another teammate and their partner.

“Don’t worry, sweet pea, you’re still my big, tough, strong hockey man” you teased and Elias removed his hand from yours, skating purposefully away and towards the corner boards. “Wait come back!”

“Nope, you come here” he challenged, crossing his arms over his chest. You sent him a pout with widened eyes but he simply shook his head causing you to sigh. You took a deep breath, loosening your knees as you’d done countless times at this point.

As you skated towards the corner boards, you found you were surprisingly calm. You’d been practicing for weeks and you knew if you fell, Elias would help you up and, minus some embarrassment, you’d be okay. You glanced up to see him grinning at you and that urged your feet on a little quicker, hoping to reach him that much sooner.

As you effortlessly glided around the corners and into his arms, Elias let out a whoop of celebration as he pulled you into a tight embrace. “You did it, älskling!” he cheered, lifting you off the ice and swinging you around a few times. You laughed as he did, holding onto him as the world delightfully spun around you.

“I did it!” you repeated as he finally set you down. His eyes were bright and so full of love that you couldn’t help but pull him down for a quick kiss.   

“Better watch yourself, Pettersson, I’m coming for your job next” you joked, skating away from him. You knew he’d catch you quickly but it was worth it to make him smile. As you felt his hands grab your waist, you let out a startled laugh before dissolving into giggles as he lightly tickled your sides.

“What was that you said?” he asked, amusement obvious in his voice. You were about to relent and take it back when Elias’ weight was suddenly gone from behind you.

“Go, Y/N, go!” Brock called and you turned to see him and Quinn holding a struggling but smiling Elias back. You didn’t need to be told twice—you were off and skating, fearlessly taking each corner as it came. As you completed the full lap to pass Elias, you cheered.

“See, I did lap you after all!” you teased skating back to him as the boys finally let him go to give you high fives.

“And with no help or cheating at all, very impressive” he said sarcastically and you grinned up at him.

“Of course not, I would never” you replied and he rolled his eyes at you.

“You’re lucky I love you” Elias said, ruffling your hair.

“Don’t I know it” you agreed, wrapping an arm around his waist so you two could continue on together, arm in arm.

A/N: Thank you for reading! C, I hope you enjoyed 💕 Thank you for giving me so much freedom with what to write, I tried to infuse what you shared with me as much as possible so it felt personalized. Now, I can finally follow you! I didn’t want to ruin the surprise beforehand lol

Swedish translation (according to google):

 älskling = darling/ my love

[sorryjustafangirl]

babe for the weekend

a/n: this is a little different than what i usually write, in terms of boy and structure but i am really really proud of how it turned out, so i hope y'all like it too! the title comes from Taylor Swift's ''tis the damn season" and it quite inspired by it. this is for @broadstbroskis, one of the very first writers i starting following on hockeyblr. it was an absolute honour to write for her in @antoinerousselssel's winter fic exchange and i really really hope she enjoys it (and all its Swiftie references <3)

pairing: morgan rielly x fem!reader

word count: 8.8k+

warnings: a few swears, holiday setting (although not crazy prominent), childhood idiot friends to lovers?

disclaimer: this is a piece of fiction and this beautiful gif is not mine! p.s. i know he got engaged recently (to the figure skating love of my life Tessa Virtue; congrats to them!) but i was too deep in the fic to switch it when i heard the news. hope you still love it!

Morgan had been getting you out of trouble since the day you two could walk. You’d knock over a vase, and he’d find a way to blame the dog. You’d convince him to mattress surf down the stairs, and he put it back while you stalled your mom so she wouldn’t know. He would tell his mom that she “saw you walk up the stairs after dinner like hours ago” when you only snuck in his window four minutes before. 

That didn’t end when he left to play junior hockey or when he got drafted and you moved across the country for school. Despite being in the same city, you relied less on him to bail you out as you got older, but every once in a while, his number was on speed dial to decipher if a guy was phishing you or for a 2am pickup from the club. 

Granted, you’d saved him just as many times. You’d posed as his girlfriend to save him from puck bunnies and more than once told his mom it was you he was out with, instead of the girlfriend he wasn’t supposed to have. Every other week, he’d call with a question he was too embarrassed to ask his own mom (“is $10 too much for a carton of orange juice?”). 

You just never thought he’d be bailing you out like this. 

As the youngest of four kids (and the last single one), your parents were overbearing about your love life to say the least. But in the holiday season? It dialed up to 11. 

“Are you sure you’re alright though? We don’t want you to be feeling lonely.” Your mom brought up at the end of your weekly Zoom family call, complete with all your siblings and grandma. 

“For the last time, I am not lonely. I have great friends, I have a good job at an ad agency, and my credit card is paid off. I’m doing great!”

“But it’s a big city, darling. You’ve been out of school for years and you still haven’t told us about any guy. Or-or girl, if you’re into that,” she tried to reason.

“Mom, she isn’t lonely because she’s getting some!” Ben, your youngest brother, chimed in, making you cringe. 

“Grow up, dork,” Julie, your eldest sister, said at the same time your older brother, James, said “Nice one!”

“Kids, you’re making Grams blush, can you knock it off?” Your dad chimed in. Ben’s face flushed but that didn’t stop James from poking the bear. 

“Just think Mom, there’s less people to feed at Christmas!” 

“That’s what you take out of this? Your sister could be at risk for depression.”

“I don’t have depression!”

“You always talk to me with an iced coffee, I do get a little concerned.” “Rude!” “Hey! Ruby drinks iced coffees too and she’s not depressed.” “She’s in a relationship with you, I’d rethink that.” “You aren’t depressed when you’re in happy relationships, that’s what I know.” “Grams, that is not true.” “That’s what Cynthia at book club said!” “None of that changes the fact that your sister hasn’t had a boyfriend in a long time and I’m worried about her!” “She’s not that old Brenda.” “She’s not seventeen anymore Thomas, our daughter is getting older and if she wants kids–” “Kids? Mom, she doesn’t even have a boyfriend.” “That’s my point!” “Who said she wants kids?” “Julie, you’re a mother, you should know every woman wants kids!” “Grams, that isn’t true.” 

All of their overlapping voices seemed to get louder, rattling around in your brain, and you couldn’t take it anymore. 

“I have a boyfriend!” You blurted and the screen silenced. You relished the small moment of quiet before the sound exploded again. 

“What?” “Yes!” “Who is he?” “Is he coming home with you?” “What’s his name?”

“Woah, woah. One at a time please,” you nervously laughed. 

“What’s his name?” The smiles on your mom and Grams faces were so wide it was starting to freak you out and your brain froze. What’s a boy’s name what’s a boy name what’s a boy’s name??

“Morgan.” 

Your brain blurted out the name before you realized its implications. 

“Morgan?” Your mom’s smile widened. “Like our Morgan? The Rielly’s boy?” 

Shit, shit, shit. “You’ll have to wait to find out.”

“If they couldn’t get together in high school, no way it would happen now. I say it’s different.” “There’s lots of Morgans in Toronto! It’s a big city.” 

“Yeah, I call bullshit on this whole boyfriend thing,” your older sister Julie chimed in.

You felt blood starting to drain from your face “What?” 

“Oh c’mon! All we have is a name? You don’t want to share his job or what he looks like? You can’t even tell us if he’s coming back with you. You’re just faking it.”

“His work is busy, we haven’t decided if he’s coming back yet!”

“Two weeks before the holidays?” She raised an eyebrow and you pursed your lips. 

“Fine. I was going to surprise you instead, but yes he’s coming back with me. And he has blond hair. Happy?” Julie only shrugged but you could hear your grandmother rejoice in the background of the call. “Look, I have to go but I’ll see you all in two weeks.”

“With Morgan! Oh, I’m so excited to meet him!”

“Yes. With Morgan.” You ended the phone call and flopped into your couch pillows before letting out a scream. 

Where were you going to find a Morgan with blond hair to act as a fake-boyfriend to meet your family across the country?  

-----

“Just call your Morgan.” Your best friend, Ivy, said as the two of you sat in Fran’s, the best diner for burger and fries past Jarvis street, for your regular lunch chat.  

“No, it’d be weird! He’s known my family for a long time and we’re friends.” You shook your head while munching on your fries. 

“Those are exactly the reasons you should take him! Plus, you said his name. I don’t get why you’re making it into this big deal about taking him.” 

“Because it is!”

“But why? It’s not like you’re in love with him,” She said, dipping her fries in ketchup. 

“About that…” You trailed off, biting your lip waiting for her reaction. 

She dropped the food before it could get to her mouth. “No!”

“Look, it was when we were in high school! I was about to tell him when we moved out here, but then he was saying how there was so much on his plate and he was feeling a lot of pressure and I just didn’t want to add to that, you know?” You took a bite of your food before continuing. “I didn’t want him to resent me for telling him at such a crucial point in his life.” 

“And now?”

You shrugged. “I think I’ll always have some sort of feelings for him. He was my best friend growing up.”

“You’re going to have to be really good at hiding those feelings when you’re posing as boyfriend and girlfriend with him.”

“Who said I’m asking him?”

Ivy raised her eyebrows. “Where else are you going to find a blond-haired Morgan to bring home to your family across the country in less than two weeks?” You threw a fry at her, which she grabbed and put on her own plate. “Besides, there’s no harm in asking. He can always say no.”

-----

“Yes.”

“Really?” You asked a little too loudly, putting your coffee mug down a little too harshly, gaining the attention of others in the cafe the two of you routinely catch up in. But you didn’t care. You were expecting a little more skepticism from Morgan when you proposed him playing a fake boyfriend role in front of your family. 

“Yeah, ‘course. It’s my job to bail you out of trouble, isn’t it?” You playfully kicked him under the table. “Besides, I haven’t seen Vancouver or your family in a while. It’d be nice to go back to the old times.” 

“Oh my gosh, thank you, thank you, thank you!” You said, instinctively placing a hand on his arm laid across the table. “Okay, so I don’t know when your season ends but I’m hoping we can fly out for like three days maximum, so it’ll be quick, and we can use your job as an excuse so that’ll be good. For the story, obviously we just went out one day after being friends for a long time, so that’ll be easy. You asked me out. Five or six months is a good timeline for them not knowing but also you coming home so let’s stick to that. You can’t tell your parents because my mom will be furious if Shirley knew before her. Um, Ben, my little brother – you know him–, he’s bringing his girlfriend Ruby, but she’s chill so you’ll get along with her a lot. Drew, my oldest nephew, he’s Julie’s kid and then Charlie and Julie had Rebekah the year before last and Izzy, who is James’s wife, just had baby Taylor a couple months ago so the house is going to be chaotic. You should be writing this down, you know.” You slowed down to notice that Morgan was just staring at you. “I just said so much stuff you need to remember.”

“I know your family. Trust me, it’s going to be fine. I’ll remember all that,” He assured you, placing a hand over your arm like you had done to him.

“Are you sure? I just..I can’t have this go wrong. Julie already suspects the legitimacy of this…fake relationship.”

He squeezes your arm and sends you one of his smiles that makes your heart swell. “We’ve got this in the bag.”

-----

You’d both decided that it’d be easiest if you came to the airport together, so you said you’d pick him up from morning practice. You were waiting in the parking garage at the arena, scrolling through your phone, until you heard footsteps. Looking up, you see Morgan, Mitch, and Willy walking towards you. You give them a shy wave, and they all return with big grins, like they knew something they didn’t. Morgan came up to you, swung an arm over your shoulder and pressed a kiss to your temple. 

“Bye guys, safe travels,” He shouted over his shoulder, the two of you walking towards your vehicle. Once they were out of earshot, you turned to Morgan.

“What was that?” 

“What?”

“That forehead kiss!”

“Oh!” His smile grew a little. “I was practicing for this weekend. Was it okay?” His slight concern made your heart beat faster and you could feel heat starting to go to your face. 

“I mean, yeah, but like won’t the guys think that, you know, we’re—” 

“Believe me, the guys already think we’re together.”

“What?!”

He laughed. “They asked about my plans for the holidays and I said I was going home with you. They just assumed we were dating and it felt like a lot of work to correct them. It’s okay, I promise.”

“If you say so,” you hummed. You unlatched yourself from his arm as you approached your car but Morgan stopped in his tracks and started to laugh. 

“You’re still driving this old thing?” He was referring to your blue Honda you’d had since high school. 

“Excuse me, you named this thing and Louise is still in great shape so of course I still drive her. Now get in.” He holds up his hands in surrender. You buckled yourself in and turned the engine over. The dash lit up like a Christmas tree and the radio was uneven again, so you hit the console a few times before it started to come out of both speakers. 

“Great shape, sure.”

“Shut up.” 

-----

Despite the busyness of the Toronto Pearson International Airport during the holidays, the two of you seemed to breeze through security and boarding. It wasn’t until you stepped onto the airplane, you’d realized just how much anxiety you got from flying. 

Morgan offered to put both carry-on bags in the overhead bins and you gladly took him up the offer. You slid into your seat, immediately putting on the seatbelt and making it tight against your hips. 

“We aren’t flying just yet,” He teased, sliding into the seat next to you.

“I know, it’s just that I–nevermind, it’s silly.” You murmured with a strained smile. 

“No, what is it?” You met your eyes and you took a deep breath. This was Morgan, your Morgan. He’d seen you cry after you got root beer up your nose and he only laughed a little. 

“Airplanes give me a lot of anxiety and I hate takeoffs. It’s just really nerve wracking for me.” 

“Okay, well I’m right here. Would it help if I held your hand?” You shyly nodded, and Mo grabbed a hold of your hand, lacing your fingers together and rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand. You tried to take deep breaths but after the safety presentation, and the plane started to taxi, it got shallower and the grip on Morgan’s hand got stronger.

“I think it's time for a distraction. Want to help me out here?” He said, turning his body towards yours as much as he could. You nodded, trying not to focus on the bouncing of the wings outside your window. 

“What kind of pet names do you like?”

That was…not what you were expecting but it certainly is a distraction. “I don’t really know? I didn’t name our dogs, Julie or my parents did. Why?” You look over to Morgan to see him quietly laughing to himself. “What?” 

“I meant like, romantic pet names. So I can play this boyfriend role right, you know?”

“Oh,” you said, feeling your face heat up. “Uh, I don’t really know. My past boyfriends weren’t really into those.” You continued to take deep breaths as he pulled out his phone. 

“Okay, cool, I’ve got a list and we can just go through them?” You nodded and he started. 

“Honey?”

“We aren’t fifty years old Mo.”

“Sweetie?”

“I’m not five either,” you joked. At your attempt at humour, you say Morgan’s face lit up. 

“What about sweetheart?” Your grimace made him laugh and he moved on. “Kitten? Dear? Babe? Sugar plum?”

“You can call me babe. For the weekend, of course. I like that one.” 

“Of course, babe.” He winked. “And look, we’re in the air already. That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

You looked out and the clouds were level, the city skyline peeking through like a scene out of a movie. You look back at him to see him already looking at you. Unable to say everything you feel for him in that moment (platonically, you tell yourself), you squeeze his hand. 

-----

As you touched back in Vancouver (still holding Morgan’s hand for safety purposes), it started to feel real. Real you were back in the city, real Morgan was here, and real that you were supposed to be acting like you’re in love. 

“Hey, I’ll be right back. Hold my bag for me?” Morgan asked, once you’d deplaned and entered the airport. You nodded and shooed him off, finding a place in the nearest lounge to wait for him. You pulled out your phone and started to catch up on messages when someone beside you cleared their throat.

“Sorry to bother you but did you go to Prince of Wales Secondary School in Vancouver?” You turned towards the voice to see someone so familiar but couldn’t put a finger on who.

“Um, yes. How did you know that?”

“I’m Abigail Brown. I think you were my lab partner in high school chemistry?” As soon as she said it, it was like everything rushed back to you. The two of you were good friends but just fell out of touch as years went on. 

“Oh my gosh yes! Oh my gosh, hi! How have you been?” You got out of your seat to give her a hug. 

“I’ve been really good! My girlfriend and I are headed to London for the holidays.”

“Oh fun! I’ve come back for the holidays with my uh..” You trailed off, thinking of what to call this arrangement. “Morgan Reilly, do you remember him?”

“Yeah, totally. Did he come back with you?” She asked, raising her eyebrows. 

“Yeah, we’re here together.”

“No way, that’s so sweet! Back in the day, everyone was wondering when you two would get together!”

“Oh, really?” You asked, surprised. You had thought that your crush on one of your closest friends was pretty discrete. 

“Yeah, a lot of us thought you’d be a cute couple. Turns out we were right,” she winked and nodded her head behind you. You turned to see Morgan coming back with two Tim Horton cups in his hands – one hot coffee for him and one Iced Capp for you. You tilted your head at his thoughtfulness. 

“My flight is boarding now, but it was so nice to see you again!” Abigail said, waving briefly to Morgan before leaving with her girlfriend. 

“Yeah, you too!” You called after her. “Is that coffee for me?” You asked, a wide smile on your face. 

“Because it is so ridiculously early, it is,” he said, placing it in your hands. “Who was that?”

“My high school lab partner. She thought we were together, actually.”

Morgan gave you a puzzled look. “Isn’t that what she’s supposed to think?”

“I mean, I guess, but we’re really just pretending for my family, so I didn’t think she’d think we’re together.” Morgan only hummed at your response and grabbed his bag. 

“Ready to head to your parents' then?” 

Like coming home, the two of you navigated through the airport easily and were on your way to your parents house in no time. Outside of the Uber, looking up at your childhood home, you felt your nerves getting the best of you again. The warm Christmas lights and the three cars in the driveway should’ve calmed you down, but instead had the opposite effect.

“Okay, so, again, we’ve been dating for five months, you asked me out. We kept it a secret, so your parents don’t know either. Ruby is Ben’s girlfriend. Drew and–”

“–Rebekah are Julie and Charlie’s kids. Rebekah is two years old. James married Izzy and their baby, Taylor, was born last month,” He finished with a smile. “Told ya I’d remember it. It’s going to be fine, let’s just go see your family?” He held out his hand for you to take and you cautiously placed it in his. He tugged you up to the front door, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to ring the doorbell. He left it over your shoulder and leaned down to whisper in your ear. 

“Trust me, we’ve got this.” He pressed a quick kiss to your cheek but before you could process what he was playing at, your mom had opened the front door.

“Oh, it is our Morgan! Thomas, I told you it was going to be him! Oh, come in, come in,” she ushered you in and your family all appeared, saying their hellos, taking your bags up to your room, placing drinks in your hands and leading you both into the living room. You settled in beside Morgan, your thighs touching each other as he reached over to entangle your hand with his.

“So, Morgan, my daughter hasn’t told us anything yet! How long have you been together?” Your mom said, once everyone was back together and catching up with the two of you. 

“Couldn’t have been too recent if you brought him home with you,” Julie said, her skepticism showing through. 

“Can’t be too long either since she never told us about him!” James said, nudging her.

Before you could get a word in and defend yourselves, Morgan spoke up. “We started dating five months ago. Might seem a little fast to come home for Christmas but I remember your family pretty well from when I was little. Plus, the schedule lined up really nicely this year so we figured, why not? But we decided to keep it to ourselves for the first little bit, with my job and everything. It can be a really hard adjustment. Especially with the media, I didn’t want them to freak her out.” 

“Aw, how sweet of you.” 

“Who asked who out?” Ruby said, curled up next to her boyfriend. 

“She asked me.” Your heart stopped as Morgan deviated from the plan you’d created. “It was nice, though, so I didn’t have to rack up the courage to ask her the same thing.” He turned towards you, meeting your eyes. To your family, you were recounting your first date and how you’ve been in love since. But Morgan was trying to get away with changing the story and you were civilly throwing daggers at him. 

“That’s nice. But you’ve got to get dressed, we’re still going cross country skiing this afternoon.” Julie said, standing up. 

“Why?” you whined. “We’re tired from traveling.”

“Then exercise will be good for you. And it’s tradition, you can’t deprive Morgan of that.” The smile she sent you was fake and you could tell, narrowing your eyes at her. 

“Yeah, babe, don’t deprive me from family traditions,” he commented, earning a small poke to his side, but you nodded, going to find your warm clothes. 

-----

Cypress Mountain was where your family always skied on Christmas Eve. It was a tradition passed on from your grandfather, who’d done it with his father, and your family liked to keep it alive. It was a thirty minute drive, forty five in Vancouver traffic, so your head fell to Morgan’s shoulder. Soon enough, he was shaking you awake.

“We’re here, sleeping beauty,” He said softly, unbuckling your seatbelt. “Ready?”

“The better question is if you’re ready. I’ve been doing this for years,” you laughed, getting out of the car and walking towards the lodge to get Morgan skis. 

“Please, I’m an athlete. I’ll be fantastic.” He grabbed your hand and your heart started to beat faster at the cute gesture, only to notice some of your family behind you, watching the two of you. Of course, it was only for show. What else would be for? You reminded yourself. 

Twenty minutes later, and you were still watching Mo struggle to clip his skis in, trying not to laugh when he fell over. 

“‘I’m an athlete, I’ll be fantastic’” you said, mocking him and he pouted. You unclipped your own skis and held your hands out to help him get up. 

“The key is this little latch here,” you said, guiding his foot into the ski. You did the same with the other before getting yourself ready. 

“Where would I be without you?” He said, as the two of you, slowly, moved to the track. 

“Probably still be on the ground,” you said with a cheeky smile. You knocked his poles with yours. “Want to go this way? It’s easier than the track they’re doing,” you said, referring to the rest of your family. 

He looked up at the hill your family, including your little nephew, were already halfway up and shook his head. 

“If this is a family tradition, and I’m supposed to be part of your family, I should do it with them. We can join them, I’ll be okay.” 

Morgan was right, for the most part. He got the hang of it pretty quickly, and soon enough you were both caught up to your family. He was smiling, and talking with your dad and brothers. You had time to catch up with Ruby and Charlie, who you never really saw in the family Zoom chats. 

Until you rounded the corner and saw Morgan standing to the side. You didn’t understand why until you saw what was ahead – the hills. For your family, including daredevil Drew, it was easy. But for a beginner like Morgan? You understood why he stopped. 

“If you want to turn back now, it’s okay. They’ll understand.” 

He shook his head again. “I’ve got to sell this boyfriend thing, don’t I? Just…can you go first?” You nodded and made your way down, gaining some speed before slowing down and stopping at the base to watch him. 

“You’ve got this, Mo, just do it!” You told him. He nodded at your words and came down slowly, mimicking the way you had just conquered the hill. His eyes were determined, the way you saw he was on the ice, and your smile got wider as he made it down successfully.

“Yes! You did it!”

That was, until he caught an edge and very ungracefully tumbled to the ground. 

“Well, you mostly did it. I thought you were supposed to be coordinated!” You said in a joking manner, maneuvering over to where he was trying to get up. 

“I don’t usually have these long things attached to my feet!” After his attempts, he held his hands out and you helped him stand upright again. 

“Are you okay? It looked like you fell pretty hard.” 

“My ego is bruised more than anything,” He mumbled. 

“Why? None of them saw your wipeout.” You nodded towards your family who were all ahead and had no idea of what had happened.

“But you did.”

“It’s not like you have to impress me,” You said, waving it off and starting to move along the trail. He only huffed, settling into pace beside you. 

-----

After making it back to the lodge in one piece, you all traveled back to your parent’s and sat down for a family dinner, albeit quick, as the kids’ bedtime was long ago. You helped your mom with the dishes while Morgan had “bonding time”, as he called it, with your brothers and Dad. 

“I’m glad you brought Morgan home, sweetheart,” she said, breaking through the quiet sounds of washing dishes. “He’s a catch and you seem really happy with him.”

You blushed, involuntarily, and nodded. “I am really happy when I’m with him.”

There were sounds of protests and laughter, so you peeked your head around to see Ben on the couch leaning over Morgan’s lap to ruffle James’ hair, only to get caught by Morgan in a loose headlock. Your dad was laughing at their antics and you joined him. It was nice to see Morgan be so carefree, especially with the stress of the season. 

“Hey!” Ben got your attention. “Your boyfriend is bullying me, tell him to stop!” 

“Maybe you deserved it,” You said, moving to be behind the couch. “Morgan is usually right.”

Morgan looked at you and only let Ben free once you gave me a small nod. You leaned down over the couch, wrapping your arms around his chest. At the slight display of affection, James gagged but thankfully, Izzy came down and whisked away her husband. Ben left shortly after that and you noticed Morgan’s head starting to drop. 

“Okay, we’re still on Toronto time a little bit,” You checked with Morgan, who was nodding along. “So we’re going to hit the hay, but Mom, I didn’t see the spare blankets for the pull-out couch?”

“Oh, you don’t need them, Ben has them.”

“What?” You asked, removing your hands from Morgan so he couldn’t tell how clammy they suddenly got. “Where’s Morgan going to sleep?”

“In your bed. It’ll be better for his back.” She answered. 

“Where am I going to sleep?” 

“In your bed.” She sighed when she saw the shock on your face. “Look, we trust Morgan. Besides, it’s a big bed and your dad and I aren’t under the impression you haven’t already slept together.” Her bluntness made you choke on your breath and Morgan patted your back, answering for you.

“Thank you Brenda. We'll be good, I promise.” 

“I know you will. And if you aren’t, know I’m not above telling your mother,” She said with a smirk. “Now, goodnight.” 

You both said your goodnights, and headed up to your room. Morgan shut the door behind you and you immediately started apologizing. 

“I’m sorry, I was certain she’d send one of us to the basement. She never let Charlie or Izzy sleep in the same room with my siblings until they were married,” you said, rummaging through your suitcase for pajamas. 

He waved you off and took a look around your room. It hadn’t changed much since high school, your parents leaving it unchanged for when you came back. The photos in the frames and on the walls were faded and each childhood trophy and trinket was covered in a small layer of dust – not enough for it to be untouched, but enough for it to be preserved. 

The sound of you digging through the closet for extra pillows broke him away from your walls. There were two blankets spread out on the floor and you dropped the pillows you’d found on the space above them.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting ready for bed,” You answered. “You can get changed in the bathroom.”

“Why aren’t you in the bed?” 

“Because you’re sleeping on the bed, hotshot. Can you please get changed, I want to sleep.” He huffed but nodded, slipping out of the room. When he came back to see you curled up on the floor beside the queen sized bed, he let out a small sigh and moved towards you. 

“I’m not going to let you sleep on the floor. Please come sleep on the bed?” He said, standing over top of you.

“I…I don’t want it to be weird.” You said, suddenly interested in the fraying fibres of your blanket. 

“It’s not going to be weird. I promise. Please?” You turned to see him with his puppy-dog eyes and you started to break.

“I don’t know Mo…”

“I’d feel better if you slept in the bed, babe, please? For me?” At that, you relented, nodding your head. He helped you up, gathering the blankets from the floor and laying them over you in the bed. 

He slipped in beside you, a large margin of space between the two of you. It was silent as you got comfy and you turned off your side table light. Morgan hadn’t followed your lead, so you looked over to see him looking at his side table. 

“Remember when we took this picture?” Morgan said, pointing to the only frame on the table. You didn’t even have to look at the photo to know which one he was referring to. It was the last day he spent in Vancouver before the draft and it was a few days before your graduation date. You’d taken your car to the North Shore and hiked to Lighthouse Park. The serenity of being able to see far into the ocean and see the downtown skyline was the place both of you had gone to clear your mind. You’d taken a silly selfie together but it was the one physical memento of your last time together in Vancouver. It was when you almost confessed your feelings to him. 

“Of course I do. It was a good day.”

“Do you think about it a lot?” He asked, and you turned your body to face him. 

“I mean, sometimes, yeah. Do you think about it a lot?”

He nodded, his eyes fixated on the picture. “Yeah. Reminds me of when life seemed normal.” 

You stayed silent for a few moments, watching his eyes begin to get hazy looking at the picture. “Are you okay, Mo?”  

He just nodded curtly, and turned off the light. “Goodnight.” 

You couldn’t lie and say his behaviour didn’t feel like a thousand cuts to your heart but you said goodnight before turning to face away from him, like he’d done to you. 

-----

The sun shining in from the window woke you up in the morning. You started to stir, stretching your arms and legs, but stopped when you felt arms around you. You slowly turned your head to see Morgan close to you, his arms wrapped around your waist. Sometime during the night, he must’ve moved to start cuddling you. You thought it should feel weird, being so close to your friend like this, but all you felt was a sense of calm. Being hyper aware of his arms, you shifted slightly to face him. 

You took the opportunity to look at him, really look at him. Not on the TV, through his hockey gear, not in the cafe when he was conscious that anyone could recognize him, but when he was just him. The sun was shining on him, giving his skin that soft golden glow. The lines on his forehead were almost nonexistent and his beard was filling out nicely. He looked so peaceful here, like he wasn’t one of Toronto’s biggest stars. You looked at him, your face softening as he started to stir under your gaze.

“Morning sleeping beauty,” you teased in a quiet voice, the same way he’d done to you yesterday. 

“Hmm, what time is it?” His voice was raspy and it took everything in yourself not to kiss him right there.

“Early,” you answered and he hummed in response. He slowly opened his eyes and must’ve noticed how close he was to you because his eyes got increasingly wider. His eyes met yours and when he didn’t see any panic or disgust in them, he relaxed, a small smile coming onto his face. 

“Morning babe,” He said, pulling you a little closer to him. 

“Nobody’s around, you don’t have to call me that.”

“What if I want to?” 

You looked up at him, eyes wide in shock and your lips parted. What did he say? It might have been a shock to your brain, but your body seemed to long for a closeness to him. Your heart wasn’t beating faster, no, it seemed to slow down, as if the idea of a relationship with him was the only thing to calm you. 

You noticed his eyes glancing down at your lips and you swallowed. Was he…what was he doing? He started to lean his head towards you and you felt yourself leaning in as well. He was close enough you could feel his breath hot on your face and see the grey flicks in his eyes. You started to close your eyes, his hand caressing your waist from under the covers, and —

“Auntie, Auntie! He came! Santa came! You have to get up! Come see!” Drew yelled through the door, pounding away as if you didn’t hear him. You broke away from Morgan, the small bubble popped by your nephew.  

“We’ll be right there Drew!” you yelled back, rubbing your forehead and getting out of bed. You left Morgan in bed, running downstairs to start some coffee, desperately needing to clear your head. What just happened? 

“Morning, sweetheart!” You sighed as your mom walked into the room, too chipper for how early it was. “I’ve got the pajamas for you and Morgan.”

“Morgan too?” It was a tradition to dress in matching pajamas on Christmas morning but you didn’t think it was something your parents would enforce for him. 

“Yup. Go get changed, I want to take photos soon.” She placed the two pajama sets in your arms and you trudged upstairs. You figured Mo was still laying in bed so you didn’t knock, just charged right in. Maybe you should’ve knocked. But then you wouldn’t get to see Morgan shirtless. Your brain short-circuited until you saw him looking back at you and you shut your eyes.

“I’m sorry, I forgot to knock! My mom wanted me to give you these. Matching pajamas and photos before gifts is a family tradition.” You tried to pull out his pair with your eyes closed but Mo just laughed when he saw you struggling. He came closer, his distinctive cologne invading your senses. He took one of the pairs, hopefully his size, from your arms.

“You can open your eyes, it’s okay.” You slowly opened one eye to test the waters, to see he was still without a shirt. You stared at him as long as it is socially acceptable to look at your best friend shirtless, before rushing out of the room to get changed yourself. 

You beat Morgan downstairs, and got started on the coffees. After buying him many hungover wake-up coffees, you knew his order by heart. You brought them out to the table, your sister and her family having their portrait taken in front of the tree. 

Mo came up from behind you, wrapping his arms around you and taking a whiff of your coffee. He recoiled at the hint of chocolate. 

“Yours has vanilla creamer, don’t worry,” you told him, taking a sip while watching Taylor get her first family photo in front of the tree. It was so nice to see the smiles across your family’s faces as you had this tradition. When it became Ben and Ruby’s turn, you noticed Drew starting to get a little antsy, his eyes fixated on the big box with his name on it. 

“Okay, sweetheart, yours and Morgan’s turn,” your mom said, clearing the area for you two to sit. 

“Oh, Mom, Drew’s looking a little antsy. We can skip ours–”

“No!” Mo interrupted you, taking one last sip of his coffee before tugging you along to sit in front of the tree. You gave him a look and smiled shyly. “It’s our first Christmas together. I want a picture. Please?” 

“Well, since you asked so nicely.” You turned to the camera, plastering a smile on. You were pretty close to him, your legs touching and his arm around your shoulders. Near the end,  Morgan pressed a kiss to your cheek and you blushed, the sound of the camera clicking long forgotten as you stared into his eyes. 

“Auntie, can I please please open my presents from Santa now?” Drew said, once again interrupting the moment between you and Morgan.

“Of course, baby, but you have to open the ones from me and Morgan next, deal?” He shrieked and scrambled over to the boxes, ripping into his wrapping paper. You stood up, grabbing your coffee before watching your nephew and niece on Christmas morning.

“Look at how cute you two are together,” She said, tilting the camera towards you. The first one was a cute photo. Morgan had his lips pressed against your cheek and your face was scrunched up in joy. She switched it to the next one, where the two of you were looking into each other’s eyes. He had the softest, earnest smile on his face. “I swear, I haven’t seen any people so in love since Ben met Ruby. I’m so glad you brought him home.” 

“Thanks, Mom.” You put on the best fake-smile you could, and turned back to the kids, trying not to think about how they two of you did look in love. But it wasn’t real and your stomach sunk. You took a seat on the couch, talking to Rebekah about her new doll and watching Drew drive his toy cars across the coffee table. 

“Who are these from?” you dad asked, holding up some small packages wrapped in blue paper.

“Oh, those are from me sir.” Morgan spoke up from behind you, moving to sit beside you. “There should be one for everyone.” Your dad nodded and handed them out to everyone while you turned to your fake-boyfriend. 

“Mo, I told you you didn’t have to bring anything,” you said, eyeing everyone tearing into their small gifts. 

“Now what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?” He winked at you, before turning to see their reactions. You were glad you’d turned too.

Everyone was holding up a different variety of a Toronto Maple Leafs keychain. Ben held one with a bottle opener on it and Drew held one that had skate on it. Some of them had the shape of Ontario with them or a special spinny part in the middle.

“You’re really banking on us liking you, eh?” Julie said, holding up her Rielly jersey keychain. 

“I’m planning on sticking around for a while. I figure you’ll be fans sooner or later,” he laughed off your sister’s hazing and assured your parents it was the least he could do. He turned to you. “And I didn’t forget you either.”

“What? No. Babe, I thought we were doing gifts back in Toronto?” If you’d known, you would’ve gotten him something, but he seemed unfazed. He brought out a medium box and placed it in your lap.  

“Are you sure? I didn’t bring anything for you,” you whispered to him. He just nodded and told you to open it. You ripped into the wrapping paper, opened the box, and tore out the tissue paper only to stop.

“You didn’t.” 

“I did,” He said, his face growing. “Bring it out, let’s see it.”

You lifted out of the box a dark wash denim jacket, the same one you’d been trying to rationalize buying for the past three months. It was your size and you couldn’t help but run your fingers over the seams, tracing the buttons. 

“Check the inside,” Morgan said, leaning over your shoulder. You turned your head to see him slightly blushing, and you turned to the jacket’s inside as quickly as you could. Inside there was a small label stitched in. Upon closer inspection, you read what it said and your breath hitched. 

 You’ve got a smile that could light up this whole town. Don’t forget it. Love, your Morgan

“Mo, I don’t even know what to say. This is-this is perfect. I love it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He pressed a kiss to your temple, before slipping out of the room, both empty mugs in his hands. Your heart started to beat faster again, and as you stared down at the inscription, you had to remind yourself that it didn’t mean anything special. He was acting like your boyfriend, but he wasn’t your boyfriend. This was all fake, and this must’ve been a part of it; a show for your family to make sure you didn’t get in trouble. 

You shoved those feelings deep inside you, instead focusing on the Christmas spirit your family had. The living room was full of laughs and someone had turned on the Christmas music. Morgan came back and sat beside you, his arm resting comfortably over the back of the couch and you couldn’t help but curl into his side. The kids came over and asked to play with Morgan and he eagerly agreed, switching from playing cars to dolls to lifting them up to play the airplane game. Like the Grinch, your heart grew three sizes watching him interact with your family – the way he was so patient and sweet with them meant everything, even if he was just pretending. 

Later, your Grams arrived and Morgan was quick to win her over as well. You bit your lip, trying to stop from smiling so wide as you watched him help her with her coat, and lead her over to where he was sitting. 

“Do you mind holding her for a few minutes?” Izzy said, coming over with Taylor in her arms.

“Of course not! Come ‘ere, darling girl.” You rocked the baby in your arms, sometimes looking over to where Morgan was. Sometimes you even catch him looking at you. You took Taylor’s little hand and waved at him, and he over-enthusiastically waved back, making you laugh. 

“You picked a good one, you know? The two of you are really adorable together.” Izzy said, coming back to take her daughter from you. 

“Thanks Iz. He’s just…” You trailed off, trying to describe the situation. “I couldn’t imagine doing all of this with anyone else.” And it was the truth. From the plane ride to skiing to the gifts this morning, you couldn’t fathom bringing back a stranger and pulling this off in the same way. 

“Sounds like you’ve found the one then.” Her comment made you choke on air and turned into a full coughing fit. Before you knew it, Morgan was beside you, his blue eyes full of concern. 

“Are you okay?” His hand was rubbing your upper back as you continued to cough. You nodded as best you could, and he turned to get his cup. When you seemed to be finished, he handed it to you. 

“Here, drink. It’s water.” You gulped down the water and sighed. 

“Thank you.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“I’m good, thank you. I’m just going to get my lip balm; will you be okay on your own for a while?” You asked, placing a hand on his arm. 

“It’s your family, not war,” He laughed. “Go, I’ll be fine.” 

You smiled at his comment and gave him a quick cheek peck before making your way out of the room. In the bathroom, you took a breather, trying to stop your cheeks from blushing. Whatever you were doing with Morgan, it felt real. But it wasn’t, and you had to keep reminding yourself of that before you got hurt. 

When you exited, Grams was standing outside the door. 

“Sorry, I didn’t realize someone was waiting,” you said, quickly leaving the bathroom but she waved you off. 

“Oh, I haven’t been here that long. But dear, my goodness, that Morgan. He’s a keeper, dear. You hold onto him, you hear me? With him, you’ll be happy for the rest of your life.” She said, patting your cheek before walking past you to the bathroom. You stood in shock for a moment at her words, before taking a deep breath and moving on. 

You were just friends. 

You repeated that to yourself as you sat next to him, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. You repeated it again when he moved your legs into his lap, caressing your ankle. You said it again when he snagged the race car, arguably the best Monopoly piece, only to give it to you, taking the lame iron for himself. 

“Hey, can I talk to you?” Julie said, tapping your shoulder, just before Monopoly (another family tradition) started. You nodded, and lifted your legs out of Mo’s lap. You pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before following her into the kitchen. 

“What’s up?”

“I wanted to apologize.” You furrowed your brows a little bit. “You know, for thinking your relationship was fake? It was wrong for me to think your relationship wasn’t serious but…I was just trying to look out for Mom and Dad. You don’t see how worried they get when you say you don’t have anyone in that big city. You’re the youngest, they’re always going to worry. And it’s just …You never even remotely told me about anyone and I didn’t want you to be faking it, just to get them off your back. But I was wrong and I’m sorry if it seemed like I was doubting your relationship. He’s perfect for you, and you seem really happy together.” 

It was everything you’d been wanting to hear – that even the most skeptic of your family bought your lie and was happy for Christmas. But no relief came like you thought it would; only a lump forming in your throat. “Thanks Julie, that…that means a lot. Would you excuse me please?”

You slipped out of the room, taking the stairs two at a time. You paced around for a few moments, before sitting on the edge of your bed, placing your head in your hands. You’ve gotten in too deep now and it’s going to hurt everyone — yourself included — when you have a ‘breakup’. Your mom will resent Morgan, sweet sweet Morgan, and he’ll probably get chewed out by his own mother, and it’ll all be your fault. You did this to your family, to Morgan, to yourself. 

“What’s wrong?” Morgan said, leaning against your doorframe. 

“Julie thinks we’re dating. Like for real. They all do. ” At your words, he pushed off the wall and sat beside you on the bed, his hands dangerously close to touching yours. You move them into your lap before you can’t function. 

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“Yes.”

“I thought that was the whole point of this? To make them think we’re dating?”

“No, it was. It’s just….” You trailed off, looking down at your hands. 

“It’s just what?” 

“It’s too much, okay!” You stood up and turned to face him. “Like you’re here. You’re in Vancouver again, with me again, in my parent’s house like we’re fifteen again! You can’t be around like this and expect me not to think about the road not taken! And it doesn’t seem to bother you! And I don’t like lying! I don’t need to be lying to both our families, your teammates, my friends! I don’t need to be lying to myself that I don’t enjoy this! It feels wrong. I know we lied a lot as kids, but it feels different this time. It feels like people are going to get hurt and I don’t think I was prepared for that.” 

He took a moment. “We don’t have to lie, you know.”

“What do you mean? We’re fake dating; fake indicating lies.” You crossed your arms across your chest. 

He took another moment, taking a deep breath. “We don’t have to be fake dating. We could…be dating for real.”

“What?” you whispered.

“Can I be honest here? Like really honest?” He asked, and you could only nod slightly. “I thought you would’ve got your head out of your ass by now. I thought you had feelings for me.

"Why do you think you said my name? You could’ve said any other name but you said mine. You could’ve found any other Morgan in Toronto but you asked me. You could’ve come clean to them! There were a thousand ways you could’ve gotten out of this but you didn’t! I thought that meant we had something special; that you were finding excuses to bring me here.” He sees your blank, shocked face as a sign to continue. 

“And now that we’re here? Back in our hometown? It just all rushes back to me about how I didn’t tell you how I felt. Then I spend the days doing your family traditions and seeing you so happy with Drew and Rebekah and thinking that I could’ve had this a long time ago. But I was a coward and I don’t know if I can make the same mistake again.”

“What are you talking about?” You said breathlessly. 

“When we were at Lighthouse Park that day, I almost told you I loved you. But I didn’t. And I went to Toronto and tried to forget the huge regret I’d made. I can’t- I can’t do that again. I love you. I have loved you since we were kids. I didn’t want you to be tied down when you moved out so I didn’t say anything and I tried to forget how I felt about you. But in two days, you’ve made me fall for you all over again and I can’t go back to how things were. I won’t. I don’t want to be your fake boyfriend when I am irrevocably in love with you. I want this,” He stood up and walked closer to you, his fingers reaching out for yours. “I want this to be real.” 

“Mo…holy shit.”

“Yeah. It’s a lot, I know.” He went to step back, to give you space after everything he said, but you held onto his hand tighter. 

“No, like holy shit, I was going to tell you I loved you that day too.” One of your hands traveled to rest on his cheekbone as you caressed his soft skin. “I didn’t want to give you more pressure as you started your career; that wouldn’t be fair. But some part of me has always wanted this to be real.”

“Really?” The corners of your mouth started to lift up as you nodded. “Can I kiss you?” He asked, ever the gentleman.

“Please.” And less than a second later, his mouth was on yours. Maybe it was a good thing you waited so long, because this was better than anything you could’ve imagined at eighteen. His hands found your waist, and pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. 

When you finally pulled away for air, you pressed your forehead against his. “Wow.” 

“You’re telling me.” You giggled at him and played with the hair at the nape of his neck.

“Guess you can tell the team we’re dating for real life now.”

He laughed and pulled you in for another kiss. “For real life, eh?”

“For real life. As long as you’ll have me. ”

“Forever then, babe.” He winked, squeezing you tight. “Now let’s go join the family, yeah? Gotta beat my in-laws at Monopoly.”

His antics had you in laughter all the way down the stairs, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. There was happiness because of him.

taglist (join here): @heatherawoowoo @4ambagelbites @typical-simplelove @2manytabsopen @stars-canucks @lorrmorr @fallinallincurls @plds2000 @barzysandhughesbaby @yummygoldenfood @drei-mrssvechii @bananarantanen @pulpfixion

[laurenairay]

All I’ve Tried to Hide - A. Svechnikov

This is my entry for the winter fic exchange 2k23, run by the wonderful @antoineroussel​.

I received @hoesforthecanes​ as a giftee, so I really hope you enjoy this Anna!

I had a lot of fun incorporating the ‘forbidden love’ trope that you had a preference for, and with writing a full fic for Andrei Svechnikov for the first time! I really hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! 🥰 definitely finished this quicker than I expected, but I was so inspired, so here we go!

All photos in the header banner are not mine; found across pinterest. Title from Dirty Little Secret, by All American Rejects.

Word count: 2k

Warnings: light angst, implied sexual moments, a little fluff

Summary: Hooking up with Andrei Svechnikov was all fun and games, as long as your brother didn’t find out…

We can’t choose who we fall in love with.

That’s what you told yourself, over and over again, every time you saw him. Every time you felt his molten gaze brushing over your body. Every time his smirk sent shivers down your spine. Every time he walked across the bar to you with that intense stare, your body filling with eager anticipation.

Because no-one knew.

That’s right, no-one knew that you and Andrei Svechnikov had been sleeping together for nearly six months now – and that’s the way it needed to stay. Why? Because your brother hated the idea of you being with an athlete. A few horrifically failed relationships in high school and college, all with athletes of various kinds, had left you broken in pieces on your older brother’s doorstep every single time, and now that you’d wound up living with him after your last failed relationship – as well as working in his bar – you were dependent on his charity. So if he said no more athletes, then it was no more athletes…at least until you could get on your own two feet again.

What? You had a type, as much as it shamed you – and Andrei fit your type to a tee.

You could remember the first time you saw him. A big loud group of bigger louder guys had filled your brother’s bar, instantly attracting attention from most the patrons, and as a few of them pushed a couple of tables together, he had walked up to the bar where you were working. You could remember the soft smile on his lips as he leant over the bar top to place his order, the gentle rumble of his lilting accent intriguing you, and you knew the moment that he set up a limitless tab with a confident wink that you were in trouble. It had only taken a couple more visits before he was slipping through the staff door, the two of you connecting in a heated make-out in a secluded corner of the storage room out back, his lips, tongue, and hands sending you wild like no-one ever had before.

And it continued, over and over again, escalating to the two of you hooking up at Andrei’s place whenever he was in town, somehow managing to avoid your brother’s judgement, keeping your risqué relationship away from the bar and under wraps.

Everything had been perfect, until the passing of your birthday last week. Andrei had been on a roadtrip on the day itself, and you’d only just about managed to convince him not to send you a bouquet of flowers to the bar (which was out of character in itself), but now that he was back he’d insisted on celebrating properly with you, so you’d come over to his place for the evening. He’d hired a private chef to cook the most amazing three course meal, the two of you sipping on the most delicious wine you’d ever tasted throughout, and as soon as the chef left, he’d whisked you off to his bedroom, bringing you to dizzying heights over and over again, until you were wailing his name out for the entire city to hear.

It was only when he presented you with a diamond necklace, your skin still gleaming and your breathing still ragged, that you realised you weren’t just falling in love with him – you had fallen, head over heels, hook line and sinker. And you also realised that you needed to end things now, before you fell in too deep to recover.

“Andrei, what is this?”

“Your birthday gift?” he said, frowning softly in confusion, “Is it too much? Do you not like it?”

“It’s beautiful…but it isn’t what we do?” you said, wincing.

His frown sunk into a deeper confused expression, so you sat upright, clutching the bedsheets to your bare chest.

“We just – this is just hooking up, Andrei. You shouldn’t be buying me expensive gifts like this. Even hiring a chef to cook for us feels crazy,” you said softly, hating the words as they spilled from your lips.

You watched as his face shuttered, his broad shoulders drawing in on himself, hating yourself for making such a big guy look so small. What was wrong with you? Why were you doing this to him when it felt so wrong? But then he seemed to steel himself, posture straightening and broad chest filling out once more – and he looked you dead in the eyes, making your breath hitch in your throat.

“You are saying this because of your brother?”

His blunt statement made you wince – it was hardly a secret how your brother felt – the anger in his words feeling like a sharp stab, mostly because he was right.

“Andrei, I-”

“I don’t want to keep lying,” he said, interrupting, “lying to myself, to you, to the world. I don’t care that your brother doesn’t want you with an athlete. I know you like me and I like you, and I want you to be mine without all the stupid lying. Why can’t you understand that?”

His words rushed through your body like burning fire, his accent getting thicker as he spoke, showing you exactly how genuine his passion was. But it didn’t change that fact that nothing could change. Even though he was confessing everything you were desperate to hear, matching your own feelings for him, because it was also everything you were trying to repress for your own good.

“It isn’t that easy,” you murmured, averting your eyes.

“So, what, I will be your dirty little secret forever? And you will do whatever your brother says, forever?”

“My brother is just trying to protect me because he loves me,” you shot back, glaring over at him.

Because this wasn’t about you being ashamed of him, or that your brother was a cruel person. You’d just messed up your love life one too many times for your brother to not want to be involved. It wasn’t that complicated.

“He loves you? Great! Well I love you too!”

Even with the anger that Andrei snapped those words at you, your whole body froze, eyes wide and lips parted in shock. And when Andrei realised what he said, he froze too, eyes wide as well as although his were wide in fear rather than in shock, as if he’d let slip something he never intended on saying.

“I didn’t…I mean, I-”

“You love me?” you managed to ask, voice soft in disbelief.

Andrei sighed but nodded, face crumpling in defeat, hanging his head to avoid looking at you.

“Andrei, I…”

You trailed off, running a hand through your unkempt hair, head swirling at his admission as all the fight drained from your body. Because how were you supposed to process this? This was everything you’d been trying to avoid, on every single level. This relationship you had with Andrei was just supposed to be a fun, fiery fling, free from any strings or expectations. And now he’d admitted his love for you, in the moment that you’d realised exactly how deep your love for him was?

What was any sane person supposed to do here?

The soft touch of Andrei’s hand resting on top of yours broke you out of your inner turmoil, and you looked over at him to see the saddest smile on his face, so unnatural in comparison to his usual happy expressions.

“I understand if you do not love me. I am sorry for putting pressure on you like that,” he said softly, smile weak, “we can pretend I didn’t say anything.”

What?

“And you’d just be happy to go back to how things were before, even with both of us knowing that it isn’t enough for you?” you asked, a little incredulous.

“If the other option is losing you entirely, then I can’t do that. I would rather have the smallest part of you, than nothing at all,” he shrugged, sad smile now reflecting the self-deprecation clearly fuelling his actions.

No, no this wasn’t okay. It wasn’t fair, not to him…and not to you. Here was a guy putting his heart and feelings on the line, believing that you were going to reject him anyway because of a few stupid mistakes you’d made in your past? A guy that treated you like no-one ever had before, brought you crashing waves of pleasure like no-one ever had before, and who cared for you like no-one ever had before? And who you cared for more than you ever had for anyone else? You were going to give up that chance of happiness, all because of a few worthless guys?

No, no way.

“I don’t want to go back to how things were before,” you said softly.

Hurt immediately flashed across his face before he quickly composed himself. “Right, okay. I’m sorry.”

It took you a few moments to realise what he meant, but when you finally did, you promptly shook your head.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that. I…”

You drew your bottom lip into your mouth as you struggled to choose the right words to say, Andrei just watching you with a hesitant expression that ever-so-slowly filled with confidence.

“You don’t want to be just a hook up?” he asked hopefully.

You shook your head, staying silent.

“You maybe want to be more?” he prompted again, a small smile spreading across his lips.

You bit your bottom lip before releasing it from your mouth, nodding shyly, earning a broad grin from the man sitting next to you.

“I need to hear you say it. Please, say it,” he pleaded softly, brown eyes wide and hopeful.

Inhaling shakily, you nodded again, looking down at your lap briefly to compose yourself before looking back at him, the hope in his eyes not having faded at all.

“I don’t know how we’re going to make it work. I don’t know how I’m going to convince my brother that this is going to work, that I’m not making another mistake. But I want to try, with you,” you said softly.

Once the words were past your lips, it felt like your blood was surging, the emotions of your confession all but overwhelming you, the hand that Andrei placed on your sheet-covered thigh the only thing that anchored you.

“You won’t regret this, I promise. I’m going to make you so happy, solnyshko,” Andrei said happily, the wide smile on his face sending butterflies soaring in your stomach.

Of that you had no doubt. No matter what happened, however your brother reacted, you knew in your heart that Andrei would be by your side, and that was enough to give you hope. His broad smile turned a little shy all of a sudden, piquing your interest as he rummaged in the sheets, clearly looking for something. And then your breath hitched in your throat as he drew out the box from earlier, delicately holding that beautiful diamond necklace.

“So if you’re mine and I’m yours, will you wear this?” he asked.

What a rush it was to hear those words.

“Right now?” you asked, confused.

He smiled sweetly, nodding, so you just nodded in return. Andrei smiled even wider, taking the necklace out of its box and unclasping it, leaning intimately closer to you as he fastened it around your neck. The cool stones sent a shiver across your heated skin, a different shiver zapping down your spine as Andrei’s finger lightly traced the edge of it, trailing across your collarbone to finish.

Unfair.

“How does it look?” you breathed.

You dropped the sheet you’d been holding to your chest the whole time you’d been sitting upright, revealing your bare body to him once more, the diamonds around your neck the only item you now wore. Andrei’s eyes darkened slightly, making your heart beat that little bit faster with the promise they held.

“Beautiful. You look beautiful,” he murmured.

When that familiar smirk crept across his lips, finally, you knew you were done for. He slowly crawled over to you, gently lowering your body back to the bed as he covered you with his own broad torso, eyes and hands and lips trailing over you in a tease that sent your blood swirling, and it was all you could do to lose yourself in his embrace.

No more secrets. No more hiding. Andrei Svechnikov was yours, and now the world was going to know.

[hockeylvr59]

I Got You || Nathan Mackinnon

Authors Note: This is my entry for @antoineroussel‘s winter fic exchange 2k23. I wrote for @raysofcrosby​ who requested an OC fic and left most things open to my creative process after we agreed that it would be Nate. This was a concept that I dug out of my ‘someday I’ll write’ pile and I’m so glad I did. Song inspiration is I got you by Leona Lewis but the overall concept comes from season 8 of SYTYCD with Marko and Melanie’s lyrical hip hop (linked under the tag 047 on my page). This one got a little away from me and even changed a bit as I was writing it but I really hope you enjoy it.

Warnings: angst, minor cursing  // Word Count: 4,747 + song lyrics

~~~~~~~

A place to crash

I got you

No need to ask

I got you

Just get on the phone

I got you

Come and pick you up if I have to

Emily Bowers learned one thing a long time ago. She would do anything for Nathan MacKinnon. And she was fairly confident that he knew it. Their meeting had felt inconsequential at the time and yet somehow they’d managed to become friends. 

But friends were all they’d ever be because when they’d met he’d already had a serious girlfriend. Alexandra was fine, Emily had met her and had absolutely nothing against her, she was easy to like. She seemingly adored Nate and put up with him even when he was being difficult, often providing Emily the chance to be the one to call him out and tell him when he was seriously being a moron. And Nate adored Alexandra. Emily could only hope one day to find someone who looked at her like that. 

Of course the couple had their fights like all couples do, but lately those fights seemed to be occurring more frequently and didn’t blow over as easily. 

So when Nate called her around 2am one night Emily already knew what had happened before she picked up the phone. 

“Hey Em…” He mumbled, “Sorry for calling so late…” 

Before he could even finish she was replying with a sigh. 

“Where are you? The airport?” 

Nate’s soft ‘yeah’ filled her ears and though Emily was worried, she didn’t hesitate, staying on the phone with him as he grumbled softly about how cold it was while she threw on sweats, a hoodie, and boots and grabbed her wallet and keys to head to her car. 

Following Nate’s directions to the private charter side of the airport, it wasn’t long before she pulled onto the empty lot where Nate was standing talking quietly to someone who appeared to be part of security. Unlocking her doors, Nate approached her vehicle and opened the backdoor, tossing his bag inside before opening the passenger door and folding himself into the seat. 

“Hey.” He whispered gruffly and tiredly. “You’re the best.” 

“And don’t you forget it.” She couldn’t help but tease softly, feeling proud when that drew the slightest smile onto Nate’s face. “I take it you want my couch?” 

Nate’s nod as he turned to lean against the window answered her question and so Emily drove home with her unexpected overnight guest. She didn’t need to know what had happened to know that this had been a rough fight but like always she was sure that after a night of space (though she could never understand how they needed more space after Nate had just been on the road) things would settle. 

Arriving home, Emily pulled out extra pillows and blankets from a closet and as she sat them beside where he was sitting on the couch he reached for her hand, his palm warm against her own. 

“Thanks Em.” 

“I got you. You know that.” 

What's weird about it

Is we're right at the end

And mad about it

Just figured it out in my head

I'm proud to say

I got you

Go ahead and say goodbye

I'll be alright

Go ahead and make me cry

I'll be alright

Emily knew that Nate was planning on marrying Alexandra. After all, he’d been sending her pictures of rings for the past two months soliciting her opinion on what she thought Alex would like since she was a girl and all. Still, knowing it was coming didn’t make it sting any less when her phone dinged with a photo of Nate kissing Alex as she showed off that brand new extravagant engagement ring Emily knew Nate had spent a small fortune on. 

I’m so happy for you. Enjoy the moment. 

Though she sent the words, Emily knew the meaning behind them was hollow if not a lie and she couldn’t help but wonder if Nate did too somewhere deep down. 

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to be happy for him, because she did, he deserved to be happy. It was just that in a way, that picture signaled a further shift in their friendship, one that she wasn’t sure was sustainable looking forward. 

After all, do friends ever last long when one has their heart broken by the other? 

Grateful that she was at least at home alone and not out in public, Emily pulled her knees to her chest and sobbed softly letting the past three years of emotions finally wash over her after being bottled and shoved deep down for so long.

It wasn’t fair for her to feel like this. She knew that. She knew that Nate had done nothing but stay within the boundaries that had been set back when they first met. This wasn’t his fault. 

It had been her fault that she’d fallen a little bit in love with him knowing that those feelings would never be returned. It was her fault that she continued to let him use her as an emotional backstop when things had gotten hard in his relationship. It was her fault for hoping that someday maybe things would be different. It was her fault for wanting more than he could ever offer. 

But knowing it was her fault and not his didn’t make it hurt any less. 

So today, today she’d let herself cry and mourn what was never to be. And tomorrow, tomorrow she would get up, rebury all of those feelings, and support Nate through the craziness of wedding planning with his bride to be. 

And it might not happen quickly but someday, someday she’d be alright. 

And when you need a place to run to

For better for worse

I got you

I got you

Ain't falling apart, or bitter

Let's be bigger than that and remember

The cooling outdoor when you're all alone

We'll go on surviving

No drama, no need for a show

The sun was shining, it was warm but not overly hot, it was a perfect day for a wedding. Entering the church that Alexandra had picked, Emily felt a swirl of emotions. Today was the day that Nate would officially be married. Dipping off towards the groom’s room, Emily knocked on the door before smiling as Gabe opened it, waving her into the room. 

“He’s a little anxious. Maybe seeing you will settle him down.” Gabe whispered, motioning to where Nate was standing looking out a window, the tension visible in his body. Nodding, Emily moved across the room toward her best friend. When Nate noticed her he opened his arms and Emily stepped into them wrapping her arms around him in a hug. 

“Big day.” She whispered. “And it’s beautiful out, which is perfect.” 

“Yeah.” Nate agreed, squeezing her tight. “You look pretty.” 

“Thanks.” Though she knew it was just an offhanded polite comment, Emily banked it in her mind nonetheless. “You look dapper, and you’re still sober, which I suppose are both good signs.” She could feel him roll his eyes at her even without looking up at him and after a moment he pulled away ruffling his hair until she had to reach up and fix it. 

“I should go get to my seat but I just wanted to check in first.” She added. “Next time I see you, you’ll be a married man.” There was a twinkle of excitement in Nate’s eyes but also an undercurrent of nerves which she assumed were only to be expected at this point. 

***

It wasn’t long after she settled into her seat that Nate and his groomsmen appeared at the front of the church for the ceremony to begin. As he stood there, Emily could see how uncomfortable he was at the venue and she bit her lip remembering how contentious that decision had been. She hoped Alex was happy to have gotten her way. 

Emily had figured that it would only be a few minutes after Nate took his place before the bridesmaids would start filtering down the aisle followed by Alex. But she couldn’t help but peek at her phone in her purse noting that the wedding was supposed to have started already. Seeing Nate fidget, Emily quickly slipped out of her seat and out the back of the church going in search of the missing bride. Instead, she found the bridal room completely empty. There was scattered trash signaling that people had been here but there were no people and no bags of personal belongings. Stepping further into the room Emily saw a ring box sitting on a table with a note tucked under it and keys beside it. 

Peeking at the ring box revealed Emily’s worst fear as it contained the ring that had been on Alex’s hand for the last year. She had left. Just up and left him standing at the end of the aisle. Grabbing the items, Emily raced back to the side entrance of the church the groomsmen had come through. Once there she cracked the door open trying not to draw the attention of the entire guest list. 

“Gabe.” She whispered quietly drawing the groomsman’s attention. “You gotta get him out of there.” 

Seeing the panic on her face, Gabe nodded and announced that there must be a dress mishap or something and that they’d be right back. 

Leading the group out of the church Gabe mouthed to her asking what was going on and Emily glanced around before mouthing back ‘she left’. With wide eyes, Gabe looked at Nate who was completely befuddled but still relatively calm as he followed the rest of the groomsmen back to the room. 

“She left?!” Gabe whisper yelled, his face turning angry. 

“Left her engagement ring, house keys, and a note.” Emily whispered, waving the items in her hand. “It’s not our place to read the note but considering there is literally no one and nothing else over there I think it’s safe to say she’s gone.” 

“Fuck that.” Gabe murmured, snatching the note and unfolding the simple piece of paper. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. This wasn’t what she expected, my ass.” He continued, rubbing at his face before handing the note back. “Fuck. What’s the plan?” 

Swallowing hard, Emily rubbed her sweaty palms on her dress. This was not how today was supposed to go and while a part of her thought maybe she’d be relieved, she wasn’t. Nate didn’t deserve this. 

“Get him out of here. I don’t care where you take him so long as it isn’t here or home. Get him drunk if need be.” Emily started. “And turn his phone off.” 

“I’ll take care of that I guess.” She continued, tipping her head toward the still full church. “And then I’ll go pack up all of her things at the house, he’s not going to want to see that. And I’ll text you when that’s done.” 

After ensuring that she had his cell number and he had hers, Gabe disappeared into the groom’s room upon her direction to just hurry and get Nate out of there. 

Emily knew that Nate was going to be confused and hurt and she hated that but all she could think about right now was doing as much damage control as possible. With Gabe texting her that Nate was reluctantly out of the building, Emily took a deep breath and stepped back through the church’s doors. 

“May I have everyone’s attention?” She said with as loud and strong of a voice as she could. “I know Nate and Alex appreciate everyone coming today. However I regretfully inform you that the bride has decided there will not be a wedding today.” Gasps went up throughout the church and she let her eyes meet those of Alex’s family who seemed just as surprised by that news as everyone else. 

“I cannot speak any further on behalf of the bride, but Nate requests that everyone please give him the time and space to process these developments. He also requests that you please feel free to proceed to the reception venue as the food and drink has already been paid for. Again thank you all for coming.” 

Stepping down from the front of the church, Emily took a few deep breaths trying to calm and focus herself. A moment later Nate’s parents and sister raced through the doors she had just exited and she approached them with a sad smile. 

“He’s with Gabe and the groomsmen. I told them to take him anywhere that wasn’t here and feel free to get him drunk.” She murmured softly. “I’m going to head over to the house now and pack up all of her things.” 

“What the hell happened?” His mom Kathy questioned, already close to breaking down herself. 

“I didn’t read the note because it’s not my place but Gabe did and murmured something about ‘this not being what she expected.’ So I don’t know.” 

After talking between themselves for a moment, Graham murmured that he was going to text Gabe about where they’d gone and Kathy asked if she could come to the house. Nodding because a second pair of hands would make things go faster, Emily asked Sarah if she could go pick up some boxes and packing tape and bring them to the house. 

****

It was dark by the time everything that screamed Alex in Nate’s house had been packed up and loaded into Sarah’s rental car to take over to a storage unit for Alex to pick up whenever she was ready. 

With Sarah and Kathy gone, Emily moved to change Nate’s sheets after texting Gabe that if Nate wanted to come home he could. With Gabe replying that they were on their way only a few minutes later, Emily sent a thumbs up and settled down at the island with a bottle of water, again breathing deeply to keep all the bubbling emotions under control. 

Though Nate was drunk when he walked through the door, he wasn’t quite as drunk as Emily had been expecting. Still, Gabe urged him up to bed and as he did so, she got water and pain meds ready to be at his bedside when he awoke. Heading upstairs, Emily watched as Gabe settled Nate into bed and frowned as mumbles of ‘I don’t understand why she did this?’ filled the room. 

“No one does.” Gabe murmured back softly. “But get some sleep man you’ve had a hell of a day.” 

With Nate seemingly on his way to sleep, the two stepped out of the room and closed the door. 

“I’m gonna stay with him if you want to head home.” Gabe declared with a yawn. 

“Gabe, you have a wife and kids. Go home. I’ll stay with him.” Emily insisted. Eyeing her for a moment, Gabe nodded and murmured softly that she was a good friend and Nate was lucky to have her. 

“I could say the same for you.” She replied. “Now go.” 

With the house finally quiet, Emily sunk into Nate’s couch tugging a throw blanket she had gotten him over her legs as she tried to settle down to sleep for a few hours. 

When she awoke she was a little surprised to hear Nate in the kitchen, the smell of eggs filling the air. 

“Hey…” She whispered cautiously, not sure how he was going to be feeling this morning. Though he looked tired and a little worse for wear, he also seemed relatively stable considering. 

“Eggs?” He asked, voice a little gruffer than usual. 

“Sure.” Emily replied, honestly starving as she had been so focused on doing whatever she could for Nate last night she hadn’t eaten since lunch the previous day. Sitting up at the island counter, she just let Nate cook not wanting to interrupt him. 

“Was thinking…” Nate started out of nowhere making Emily jump a little. “You don’t start your new job for a couple more weeks right?” 

That was not a topic that Emily was expecting Nate to bring up but it was true that she was off for a few weeks between jobs. 

“Want to come to Fiji with me?” 

Nate had glanced over his shoulder with the question and Emily could only meet him with a blank look. 

“I mean the honeymoon was already booked and paid for and I’m not going to not go…” Nate mumbled. “Thought maybe you’d want to come…drink, eat, tan, swim, just chill.” 

Though it seemed a bit taboo to go on someone else’s honeymoon, Emily could tell that Nate really didn’t want to go alone and when else would she get a chance to go to a beautiful resort in Fiji. 

“You know what…sure. I’m in.” She declared. The way Nate’s whole body relaxed told Emily it was the right decision and as he slid a plate of eggs across the island to her there was even the smallest trace of a smile on his face. 

“Awesome. Eat up and go pack. Flight leaves at 3 so I’ll swing by at noon to get you.” Blinking a few times, Emily tampered her surprise because of course the flight was leaving today. She definitely needed to rush to get ready though because she certainly hadn’t planned on going anywhere. 

But now, now she was just going to go with the flow. 

****

Three things popped into Emily’s head when they arrived at their villa on Royal Davui Island in Fiji. First…the travel had been a complete bitch and she was exhausted. Second, she had never seen a view this beautiful in her entire life. And third, though she should have expected it, there was only one bed. At least the couch looked comfortable enough. 

“Nate…this is stunning.” She declared immediately opening patio doors to step outside onto the balcony. It was truly paradise in every way. She could literally just spend the next week sitting here and staring at the view. 

First though she needed a shower, a change of clothes, and possibly a nap. 

Checking the first two off the list, Emily saw Nate sitting in a chair off on the living room patio and she moved over to him, surprised to see drinks and food waiting there already. 

“Figured it had been awhile since we ate.” Nate declared motioning for her to sit. Everything looked absolutely delicious and Emily couldn’t wait to dig in. But Nate was holding up his drink in toast and she wasn’t going to leave him hanging. “To new chapters.” He murmured softly. 

“To friendship.” Emily echoed clinking her glass against his before taking a sip. If the drinks were this good she was about to spend this whole trip more than a little buzzed. 

Enjoying their lunch, Emily just gazed out at the view once again amazed at how stunning this place was. There was a certain peace that came from being here, to finally be still after all the chaos. 

Deciding that that nap sounded like a great idea, Emily moved to lounge on the couch under the cool ceiling fans and though the room was bright, sleep came easy. 

Her nap was followed by a trip down to the white sand beach with Nate and exploring the rest of the amenities on the island before they settled back at their villa for a private dinner. 

When it came time for bed, Emily moved to settle on the couch once again and though Nate looked like he wanted to say something, he kept his mouth shut. 

Overall the next few days were similar, Emily and Nate dined together but they didn’t always spend the whole day attached to each other’s sides. Nate used the fitness center on the island while Emily curled up on a lounger tanning and reading. Nate went hiking while Emily enjoyed the plunge pool at their villa. 

They did go on a scuba excursion together and there were the couples’ massages Nate had arranged which had been slightly awkward but for the most part they just relaxed whether they were together or off on their own. 

On the fourth morning, with Emily having awoken while Nate chose to sleep in, she sunk into the plunge pool just relaxing and looking out at the ocean as the sun rose. After about twenty minutes she heard footsteps before Nate’s voice softly asked if he could join her. Nodding, Emily shifted along the edge and Nate approached her, sinking down beside her. 

Neither said anything, just watching the new day start. Shifting, Nate’s leg brushed against hers under the water and Emily startled a bit not expecting the skin to skin contact. It wasn’t unpleasant, just unexpected. And though he apologized, Nate’s energy felt like it had shifted. Over the course of the past few days he’d been pensive which made sense given the way his life had just been upended and Emily couldn’t help but wonder a bit what he’d been thinking. 

“Are you sleeping okay on the couch?” He eventually asked. “Because it’s a king sized bed. It wouldn’t be that awkward to share it. You know if you wanted to…” 

Emily had known Nate long enough to know that while he may have phrased it in a way that put the ball entirely in her court, he wouldn’t have said anything if it wasn’t something he wanted at least a little. 

“I mean I guess I could be sleeping better.” She admitted leaving it at that and knowing that he’d draw the rest of the conclusions for himself. 

Sharing Nate’s bed that night after spending the day paddle boarding and snorkeling once again had been surprisingly comfortable and it wasn’t a surprise to Emily when she ended up tucked under Nate’s arm with his chest pressed against her back. It likely wasn’t a surprise to Nate either and if it was he played it off easily getting up to go get a morning workout in. 

While he did that, Emily soaked in the jacuzzi tub before settling down with another book. She was 100 or so pages in when Nate flopped down beside her on the other lounger.

“So Alex texted asking if I had gotten the ring, keys, and her note.” Nate stated. 

“They’re uh on your dining room table.” Emily murmured, peeking over at him. 

“I know.” Nate sighed softly. “I saw them.”  He paused. “I told her I didn’t understand why she had walked away. Or why she had waited until we were literally getting married. She hasn’t responded yet. And I don’t know what to expect if she does or if she even will. Was it my fault Em? Was it something I did? Something I didn’t do?” 

Closing her book, Emily sighed and twisted to sit up and look at Nate. It was clear that this had been bugging him for more than this morning but that he had finally worked his way through it enough to talk about it. 

“I can’t answer that Nate. I’m not Alex so I don’t know what it was that she was expecting or why she waited so long if she wasn’t happy and didn’t say something first. But regardless of her reasons, the way she went about it was shitty. I know that and I know you know that. You deserved better than to be stood up at the altar with just a flimsy note of excuse and no warning.” 

Nate mused over that for a second before murmuring that Alex had also inquired about getting her things. 

“Your sister already sent her the info for the storage locker.” Emily replied. “So you can just ignore all of that, it's been taken care of.” 

Looking lost in thought, Nate sat there for another fifteen minutes before murmuring that he was going to go take a nap. Knowing that he needed as much space as he wanted to sort through it all, Emily returned to her book just basking in the backdrop knowing that they were leaving in the morning and not wanting to waste a second of the view. 

Just wanna say

I got you

After spending most of the day sitting and reading, Emily decided to go for a walk and when she returned another private dinner was set up. 

“God I’m going to miss this food.” She declared calling out to where Nate was leaning against the balcony. 

“Yeah.” He agreed though it was clear that he was as lost in his thoughts now as he had been earlier. 

It was another quiet meal with her not pressing him to talk about whatever it was on his mind. While he took the dishes outside for the staff to retrieve, Emily leaned against the balcony as the sun started to creep lower in the sky. 

And though she heard Nate’s steps return, she expected him to lean against the railing beside her. Instead, he stepped behind her, sliding his arm around her waist in a reverse hug. 

“You’re gonna be okay Nate.” Emily whispered. “I know it’s hard now but you’re going to get through this.” 

“Did you read it?” Nate asked, his voice low in her ear. 

“Read what?” 

“Alex’s note.” 

“No Nate. That wasn’t my place.” Emily insisted. “That was a note meant for you.” 

“Except it had your name on it.” 

Before she could insist that no it hadn’t, Nate had placed a crinkled piece of paper into her hand. There plain as day in Alex’s handwriting was Emily, not Nate written on the front. How had she not noticed that? Unfolding the paper Emily started to read the message that had been intended for her eyes not Nate’s.

So that was where Gabe had gotten his mutterings and he’d stopped reading right there. Continuing on, Emily found herself biting her lip.

By the time she had finished, Emily had practically stopped breathing. That was…a lot. Her brain was spinning and her legs felt weak. Thankfully Nate’s arm secure around her waist held her up. He’d obviously read the letter a few times even if it was never met for him and Emily couldn’t help but feel guilty. Alex had left because of her. This was her fault. 

With her legs collapsing completely, Nate’s grip tightened even more and he shifted them back to the couch, pulling her onto his lap. 

“I got you.” His words were muffled by the press of his mouth against her bare shoulder but she heard them loud as day. How many times had she said those same three words to him in the past four years? And yet coming from his mouth they felt completely different. 

They sat there with his nose just teasing against the skin of her shoulder until the sun had sunken fully in the sky and her breathing had regulated. 

“Em…” He started softly, his voice vulnerable. “I know it might not be time just yet but when it is….I think I want to take that chance. Will you take it with me?” Her nod was instinctual, there was no other explanation for it, but it was enough for Nate’s shoulder’s to relax. “Yeah?” He questioned. 

The kiss that followed could barely even be called a kiss but it held a promise. As Nate cupped both her cheeks, his lips grazed against hers faintly before his forehead pressed against her own communicating without words. 

I got you. 

[buttercupjosh]

Unexpected Love (the 4 times Cale surprised you + the 1 time you surprise him)

(Gif credit by @9116)

word count: 3,240

warnings: none

Genres: Strangers to lovers, fluff, self insert

A/N: I decided to step a bit out of my comfort zone a lot for this story. I participated in @antoineroussel’s Winter Fic Exchange and this is my story for @wildrangers, written with the extremely talented Cale Makar. I hope that you like it. I’m sorry in advance that it kinda speed runs a bit but I just wanted to try something different. I also decided to challenge myself by writing some dialogue for the first time in years so please bear with me if the conversations aren’t that great. Title doesn’t come from a specific song/place. There’s a reference to Glittery by Kacey Musgraves feat. Troye Sivan buried in the story. As always, I’m open to any and all feedback, comments or questions; just put them in my inbox or dm me. Thank you so much in advance for reading, I appreciate it😌

Recommended/optional listening: Glittery by Kacey Musgraves feat. Troye Sivan

“What if I told you none of it was accidental? And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me. I laid the groundwork, and then, just like clockwork, the dominoes cascaded in a line. What if I told you I'm a mastermind? And now you're mine, it was all by dеsign.” -Mastermind by Taylor Swift

Although it was snowing outside, you were melting down inside of your apartment. You lost your wallet and the last place you were before coming home was the Target parking lot. You called the store to see if someone had turned it in and were getting ready to go back to the store to check when your doorbell rang. A tall blonde boy wearing a black puffer and a maroon Colorado Avalanche hoodie stood in your doorway, holding your wallet. He introduced himself to you as Cale and you thanked him for bringing it back to you. Before Cale left, you asked him why he brought your wallet to your apartment instead of mailing it back to you or returning it to the store. He explained that your apartment was on the way to his so he stopped by to give it to you. You were taken aback by Cale’s kind gesture. He had no idea who you were and yet he drove out of his way to bring back your wallet, with everything in it. You offered Cale gas money (which he refused) and pleaded with him to let you repay him somehow for what he did.

“Well, you can pay me back by going with me to watch the Nutcracker. I really want to go check it out but none of my teammates want to go with me”, Cale responded.

“Actually, that’s something that I’ve been wanting to do as well and I would love to go with you. Are you free next Saturday?”, you asked.

“I have a game next Saturday but maybe we can go next Sunday’s 6 pm showing?", Cale replied.

“That works for me.”

“I’ll pick you up.”

“I would hope so since you already know where I live.”

Cale chuckled at your words and you exchanged numbers before he left. It really wasn’t an issue for Cale to bring you back your wallet. Sure, like you had mentioned, it would have been easier to return it to the store or mail it back to you (which is what he would have done if you weren’t home). Cale was glad that you were there and that you agreed to go with him to see the Nutcracker. It was something that he had really wanted to check out for a while but the guys on the team weren’t into it and Cale didn’t want to be set up again by the WAGs; he had even considered going to watch it alone. Thankfully, he met someone new and Cale was looking forward to seeing you again.

————————————————————

Just as you had agreed to, Cale picked you up right on time for your outing together. You and Cale didn’t really know each other well enough to call it a date but by the end of the evening, you both knew it was one. Before going to the venue, you both agreed to go to dinner first. Over the meal, you both learned about each other and shared stories about your lives. You thought it was fascinating to hear about life in Canada, a place you’ve never been to, from someone who was born and raised there. Cale felt the same way about you, hearing you talk about your life and your career as a social worker. He admired that you enjoyed helping others. You and Cale also shared a mutual experience of attending college and you both shared stories from that chapter in your lives. Cale even felt comfortable talking to you about some of the things he studied in his psychology courses since you studied social work.

After dinner, you and Cale headed over to the Denver Center for Performing Arts. The Nutcracker was amazing and spectacular; it exceeded both of your expectations. The center was close to the public ice rink, so after the event ended, Cale noticed that your eyes lit up when you saw everyone skating. He asked you if you wanted to go ice skating. You hesitated to go because you don’t know how to ice skate and you can barely even roller skate. You did not want to embarrass yourself skating in front of someone who won the Stanley Cup. Despite these feelings, Cale offered to teach you how to skate if you wanted to try. It was not everyday that a professional hockey player offered to teach someone how to ice skate so you agreed to it. You paid for the skate rental since Cale paid for the tickets to the Nutcracker and you split the bill for dinner. Cale was nice enough to tie your skates for you. You were so nervous to step out of the ice but a newly familiar voice reassured you.

“Just hold onto me, I got you. If you fall, I’m right here to pick you up. I promise you that you’ll be okay. If you don’t like it at any point, we could leave.”

You took Cale’s words to heart and following his instructions, you reached out to him and shakily touched the ice. Cale turned around to face you and he gently guided you through the basics of skating. It took some time for you to get it right and there were plenty of moments when you had trouble maintaining your balance but you were relieved that Cale was so patient with you. As time passed, you started to become more comfortable on ice skates and eventually let go of him, but remained close by in case anything happened. However, Cale didn’t want you to let him go because he liked being physically close to you. At one point, you felt confident enough in your skating ability that you challenged Cale to a race around the rink. You decided that the winner would choose the next outing you did together and the loser would pay for the hot chocolate when you were done skating.

You were a bit bold in what the winner won, even though you weren’t fully sure if Cale had wanted to hang out with you again. You both agreed to the conditions and you were relieved that Cale didn’t offer a different option for the winner. You and Cale began to race from one end of the rink to another. Due to the fact that this ice rink has tons of skaters and wasn’t as well maintained like the one at Ball Arena, Cale accidentally fell on the ice. With your assistance, Cale got back up. You both agreed to leave and went to a cafe nearby for some hot chocolate.

“Are you sure you’re a Stanley Cup champion if you fell down like that?”, you joked. Again, you made Cale laugh. He liked that about you, how witty and funny you were.

Despite him falling, you technically won the race and decided that your next outing with Cale would be going to look at the Christmas lights at the Denver Botanical Gardens that upcoming Friday evening. The outing at the Botanical Gardens was beautiful and you and Cale took plenty of photos to keep as memories. Cale really enjoyed spending time with you, even if you didn’t get to see each other as often, due to his busy schedule. Even though he was primarily occupied with hockey, Cale still kept in contact with you more frequently, getting to learn more about his newfound friend.

Christmas was fast approaching but you were unable to see each other before the holiday. You and Cale had made plans to see each other once he got back from Calgary over the short holiday break. You weren’t sure what to get him since Cale never really mentioned anything that he had needed or wanted and you had only known each other for a short time so you settled on giving him a Christmas card with a Starbucks gift card inside. However, close to Christmas, you got a gift in the mail from Cale.

Hope I got the right color. Happy Holidays, y/n

-Cale

You were shocked when you opened the package. Cale had somehow found the rare In The Weeds vinyl variant of Folklore by Taylor Swift. You had mentioned to Cale once that you were looking for a Folklore vinyl to complete your record collection but you didn’t think he would go as far as getting it for you. You were so thankful for Cale; you hadn’t known each other long but you knew that you really had a good guy on your hands.

————————————————————

You met up with Cale for lunch after he returned to Denver from Calgary so that you could give him his Christmas card. Although you felt inferior by giving him something so simple, Cale was very appreciative for the gift because it was thoughtful and came from you. As the time inched closer towards the new year, Cale invited you to the Avs’ New Years Eve game and party; you thought it was nice for him to include you in a team event. You were just Cale’s friend so you didn’t feel comfortable sitting with the WAGs at the game. You brought along one of your friends, who would spend the rest of the holiday with her boyfriend, to keep you company. You had watched hockey casually before but this was your first time attending an actual game. You had a good time; they didn’t win but it was okay.

After the game ended, Cale and the rest of the team migrated towards the New Year’s party at JT and Sydney’s place. Due to the fact that it was a holiday and he knew that he could work it off later, Cale decided to drink a little bit to ring in the New Year. By the time the clock started to wind down in the final minutes, he was already giggly and tipsy.

“Hey, y/n, I’ve never had a New Year’s kiss before. Would you like to be mine?”, Cale asked you.

You weren’t sure if he was asking you to kiss him because he was under the influence or if he was showing his true feelings. You had gone out together more than once but neither of you expressed those hangouts to be dates (even though they lowkey were). You and Cale considered each other friends but you did have a little crush on him. You didn’t want to hurt Cale’s feelings either (even if he wasn’t sober) so you agreed to kiss him. You chanted the countdown with everyone. When everyone yelled “Happy New Year”, Cale leaned in to kiss you on your cheek. Yep, even though he wasn’t fully sober, he was still being respectful. You laughed after he pulled away. Cale enjoyed the sound of hearing you laugh. You had wanted to kiss him back on his cheek but you decided against it. You weren’t sure how Cale truly felt about you sober and you didn’t want to muddy the waters of what you had by doing such a thing.

The following morning, you got a phone call from a certain rosy cheeked cutie, asking you to be his romantic partner. That one phone call changed everything for the better between you and Cale. You were so relieved to hear that he liked you back and his drunk actions did convert to sober thoughts.

————————————————————

Spending time with Cale felt like the world had stopped, time didn’t seem to pass and that time together turned from months to years. Your relationship felt like something out of a love song. Of course, there were expected highs and lows, losses and gains, disagreements and mutual understandings, tears shed and kisses shared all in between. Cale was right there by your side through it all. Things just fell into place for you both and it was almost like you were meant to be together, like it was part of some plan schemed by a mastermind. You didn’t have any evidence but it was like Cale had designed different ways for you to keep falling for him and you would continue to fall deeper and deeper into him and his love.

After being together for some time, you and Cale had decided to make the huge step of purchasing a house. You had found the perfect new build in Cherry Creek and were excited to spend your future together in this home. One weekday evening after Thanksgiving, you and Cale decorated the Christmas tree. You were both busy with work so you couldn’t push it off until the weekend. It was nice to have this time together, even if it wasn’t much. You had shared with Cale a fun family tradition; as you hung up an ornament on the tree, you had to say one thing that you loved about the other person. You knew deep down that Cale loved you but it was nice to hear him say the things that he loved about you; his presence in your life lit you up inside like a glittery Christmas tree. It meant a lot to Cale to hear from you specifically the things that you loved about him; he loved the way you decorated his heart with your kindness, selflessness and compassion. As you continued to hang up ornaments and string garland around the tree, you had quietly started to wonder about when Cale would propose. You had been together for over a year and you were already in the process of getting a home together. To you, Cale was the man of your dreams and he was worth the wait. To Cale, you were the one he wanted to marry and he was so grateful to have you as part of his life. He was glad that you had adjusted well to his lifestyle as a hockey player and being thrust into the spotlight by being romantically involved with him. Cale knew that the love you had shared together could not be replicated with anyone else. You both had this strange, unexplainable effect on each other.

Realistically, you had thought Cale would probably propose to you on Christmas when both of your families were in town. There was no guarantee that you would close on the new house and be moved in by then so Christmas was going to be hosted at the apartment. Cale knew when it was the right time to propose and it wasn’t when you had expected.

Right before Christmas, Cale had gotten a call from the real estate agent for you to meet at your new home to officially close on the property. You both had gotten dressed in your nicest sweaters since there would be a photographer there to take photos of the realtor’s clients with their new homes and you drove together to the location of your new address. You had arrived and noticed that the realtor wasn’t around with the keys to the house. However, the photographer was there. Cale got a text from the realtor who said that he was running late. The photographer suggested you take photos while you waited. You and Cale had professional photos done together before so it didn’t hurt to add more to your collection. During the impromptu photoshoot, Cale got down on one knee, holding your dream ring in a box.

“Y/n, from the moment I met you, I knew you were someone special. I couldn’t have planned the way that we met but after I left your apartment that day, something in my heart spoke to me and I started making plans to pursue you and your heart. I’m so glad that those plans worked out. You are such a light in my life, I love that you’re so kind and you’re one of the most hard-working people I’ve ever met, you’re so beautiful, inside and out. You are my best friend and the love of my life. I love you so much. Now that I have you in my life, it’s hard for me to imagine it without you. There’s no one else in this world that I would want to wake up next to, fall asleep with and spend the rest of my life with. Y/n, will you marry me?”, Cale asked. Your suspicions about him were right after all. Overwhelmed with joy and with tears in your eyes, you accepted Cale’s proposal and were met with one of your favorite gifts: a kiss from your lover.

Unknown to you, Cale already had a copy of the key to your new house. As soon as you opened the door, you were greeted with cheers and hugs from both of your friends and family. Some of the guys from the team and their partners were there as well to celebrate this special moment for you and Cale. You also saw that there was food and some decorations for your engagement party. The realtor was also there inside, with the paperwork so that you could legally sign off as a homeowner. Putting pen to paper, it was officially done. You couldn’t quite believe it; you had started the day off as Cale’s romantic partner and you ended it by becoming new homeowners and Cale’s fiance.

————————————————————

It was Cale’s first birthday as your husband. He came in late last night after an East Coast road trip and slept in late since the Avs had a few days off in between games. Cale looked so peaceful, deep into sleeping and snuggled up with your dog, Benny. You quietly slipped out of bed and went into the kitchen. You tried your best to not disturb your sleeping husband while you made pancakes for him. You knew that Cale always had some sort of surprise for you because he enjoyed seeing the joy that creeped across your face when he surprised you and this time, it was your turn to surprise him.

Cale knew that you weren’t an early bird at all and without an alarm, you could sleep through anything (including the apocalypse); you also tended to sleep in on most weekend off days. He was genuinely surprised to see you up before him. Cale was even more surprised to see that you decorated your shared home with balloons, streamers and a Happy Birthday banner for him. Sure, he had been surprised on his birthday before but it meant even more to him that you did this for him. You sacrificed your sleep to cook for him and to put things up instead of offering to go out to eat or hiring someone else to do everything. He didn’t care if you had got him a super expensive, special birthday gift or had even more surprises up your sleeve. Cale had all that he wanted for his birthday, right here, just feet away, dancing in the kitchen.

The one thing that wasn’t planned at all for Cale’s birthday was the snowfall. According to the weather forecast, there was a 40% chance of snow for October 30th and it was only in the upper elevations near the mountains. That 40% chance of snow turned 100% overnight and now all of Denver was blanketed in white. The unexpected snow on the ground meant that winter came a bit sooner than expected; it also meant that the days were going to get grayer and colder. Although the snow was here to stay, all it took for Cale was one look at you, his heart would get warm and it would all melt away.

[tinyhockey]

be my fire in the cold - winter exchange 2k23

well this is something eh? i went into this hoping to get up the courage to write my first hockey fic and ended up writing about 9.3k words of christmas fluff. who'd have thought!

big thank you first and foremost to @antoineroussel for organizing this exchange! thanks to my beta readers @hockeytwinx @neuroweird and @thewonderzebra, and to @2manytabsopen @jostystyles and @teex for help with characterization.

and lastly, but most importantly: thank you to @lifeofpriya for giving me such wonderful inspiration and answering each and every one of my probably very annoying questions! from your magical winter exchange elf, i hope you enjoy! 💖

quick note that this is an OC fic and an AU. have fun reading!

“Santa, tell me if you're really there…”

Priya hummed to herself as she sent off another email, unconsciously nodding her head to the sound of Ariana Grande belting through her airpods. She’d had her Christmas playlist practically on loop over the past six days, as if determined to broadcast as much holiday spirit as possible directly into her ears. She didn’t think anyone could really blame her for that, though. There were only so many days out of the year where it was socially acceptable to blast Santa-themed music. It only made sense to make the most of them.

Besides, it had been a slow morning at the office. Priya had been hired as an intern (paid, thank-you-very-much) back in October, and she had quickly learned that there was no such thing as an average workday. Sometimes she found herself rushing around running errands for every person who passed her desk; thankfully, most of them were friendly, with a few exceptions she preferred not to dwell on. Other times, like today, she had to stop herself from browsing skincare websites or looking up last night’s baseball highlights. Thankfully, she’d found that her long hair typically hid her earbuds, meaning she could listen to audiobooks or k-pop albums to make the time go by faster. Unfortunately, they were sometimes too good at soundproofing.

“Don't make me fall in love again if he won't be here next year…”

“Priya!”

She jolted at the sudden call, eyes darting up, only to see her manager standing before her desk, a wry smile on his face. She quickly reached over to pause the music on her phone, tucking her hair behind her ears as she removed her airpods.

“Sorry, Dougie,” she smiled sheepishly. “I’m working, I swear.”

“Sure you are,” he teased, letting out a laugh. 

“No, seriously! I just sent off some emails. I just figured, you know…” Priya shrugged. 

“It’s fine,” Dougie shook his head fondly. “You’re fine. I’m sure you can get your work done while you listen to carols.” 

“Maybe I’ll be better with some Christmas music,” Priya responded. “Almost everything is.”

Dougie’s smile grew. “I’m actually glad you said that.”

Priya was halfway to matching his expression, only to suddenly take notice of the bright red folder in his hands. She quirked an eyebrow upwards in suspicion. “Should I be worried?”

“Oh, yeah. Extremely.” After a second, he clarified, “I’m kidding.”

“I figured.” Priya nodded towards the folder. “What’s in there?”

“Oh, right! So.” He leaned forward across her desk, as if he were entrusting her with some great mission. “Every year, we have this big company holiday party towards the end of December. There’s always music, and it gets catered with all this awesome food. One year, they even had an open bar. Now that was a fun time.”

“It sounds like it,” Priya laughed, eyes still trained on the folder. “So is this an invitation, or…”

“Oh. No. Well, kind of,” he laughed. “See, the last couple years, it’s always been planned by the same two people. But one just retired, and one’s out on maternity leave. So…”

“You entrust it to the intern,” Priya finished, tutting in fake disapproval, though her smile was clear even as she shook her head. 

“It won’t just be you. Not that I don’t think you could pull it off alone.” Dougie passed over the folder. “Tom and Linda left all the major stuff in there. Who to call if you have questions about the space, which caterers they usually hire, all that stuff.”

Priya flipped through the folder as Dougie spoke, running her finger down the pages. The photos of the ballroom showed a large but intimate space, with dim lighting and velvet curtains. It would be nice to hang some string lights over the windows, she thought. And they could set up some tables there, and maybe a photo booth if the budget allowed…

“Does that sound good?”

Priya glanced up from the folder, lips already curved into a smile. “Yeah, no, of course. Absolutely. It’ll be fun.”

“Great!” Dougie smiled back. There seemed to be something slightly more to it than just a happy sort of relief, but Priya couldn’t quite pin it down. 

He took out his phone, firing off a few emails. “You have anything going on at 4:30 today?”

“Not that I know of,” Priya shrugged. “Why?”

“I’ll book off one of the smaller conference rooms for you guys, then. You can get started on the planning. Normally we have it on the Friday before Christmas, so that gives you about two weeks or so.” Dougie smiled as he slipped his phone back into his pocket. “I look forward to it.”

He had already taken a step away when a question popped into Priya’s mind. “Dougie!” she called. “Who else am I working with?”

“Didn’t I just tell you?” he chuckled. “One of the other interns, from tech support. You might know him.”

No. No, no, no, please, no, anyone but-

“You’ve met Nico, right?”

Damnit.

“Uh, yeah, I think. Once or twice.” Priya fidgeted with the corner of the folder, hoping she’d kept her face in a neutral enough expression.

“Cool. Glad you two know each other,” Dougie smiled, that same strange tinge to his grin as before. “You guys will be great together, I’m sure.”

She smiled tightly. “Can’t wait.”

Priya waited until Dougie’s footsteps sounded far enough away, letting out a groan as she dropped her head onto her desk. Of course. Of everyone in the entire company, it had to be Nico.

She hadn’t started off disliking him. In fact, she’d almost thought he was cute. Alright, fine, she’d thought he was incredibly cute. When she’d seen him at the intern orientation, she’d been the first to come up to him and try to introduce herself. Instead, all she’d found herself met with was a dark look and a curt reply. She’d tried sitting with him at lunch, asking him about himself, even bringing in coffee for him. Every time, the same sullen stare, the same short sentences. She’d won over almost everyone else in the office. Nico was her one exception. 

Every so often, Priya still caught him staring at her. Across the cafeteria, in company meetings — she’d turn her head, and catch him just turning his away. She couldn’t figure out exactly what she’d done to irritate him so much. At this point, she wasn’t sure finding out would make the difference.

Sighing, Priya propped up the folder on her desk, studying its festive red color as she put her airpods back in. There wasn’t any going back on it now. She’d already agreed. Dougie was her manager, and she didn’t want to let him down. Maybe, she thought, starting her playlist back up, it would end up being fun. Maybe Nico wouldn’t glower at her too much, and the whole thing would go off without a hitch.

It’s Christmas, she thought, letting out a breath as she went to check her inbox. Miracles happen all the time.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

4:30 found Priya sitting in the conference room, alternating between looking through the window of the door and her phone clock. Once or twice she considered messaging Dougie, just to ensure she hadn’t misheard him on the meeting time. To be fair, she was sure tech support was always busy, and something might have come up. With Nico, however…

It took another ten minutes for the door to finally open. Priya glanced up from the red party folder on the table, watching as Nico walked in. He barely even seemed to notice her, eyes glued to his phone screen as he typed something.

Seizing the opportunity to take a quick breath, Priya forced herself to smile in his direction. “Hey.” Nico didn’t respond even as he sat down in one of the free chairs, crossing one leg over the other. His eyes remained trained on his phone, seeming to be reading something before going back to typing. To her surprise, she thought she could almost see the hint of a smile on his face. 

Clearing her throat, Priya sat up in her chair, straightening her back. “So, um, looks like we’re working together, right?”

Nico was silent until he finished his typing, putting his phone face-up on the table. “Yes,” he responded, dark eyes seeming to study her — judge her, even. “Dougie gave you the folder.”

“Yeah. Yeah, um, he did.” She nodded, a tight smile returning to her face as she flipped it open. “I already called the venue owners, and we’re all set for the Friday night before Christmas. I didn’t want to do anything else before I asked you, but I did look up a few ideas, and I think-” Priya went to hand over some of the ideas she’d printed photos of, only to see Nico back on his phone, typing something. She frowned, voice trailing off into silence.

Nico finished typing, glancing up again. “You can keep talking. What ideas?” Priya took a breath, passing the papers across the table. “I looked up some holiday decorations, and I thought the Christmas tree made out of balloons was super cute. And then-”

“You can’t have a tree made out of balloons.”

Priya raised her eyebrows. “I’m sorry?”

“That’s silly. We could get a real tree for the same as it could cost for all of those balloons,” Nico rebutted, passing that page back across to her.

She frowned, looking back down at the photo. “I mean, maybe. But a lot of people are going to have trees at home, you know? And it’s easier to take down balloons than it is to get rid of a big tree. Plus, you’d get pine needles everywhere.”

Nico huffed out a sigh, shaking his head as he flipped through her other pages.

Priya felt her shoulders slump, softly biting down on her bottom lip. “Okay. Maybe it’s a little much for, like, just starting out.” She went back into the folder, taking out a blank sheet of notebook paper. “What about, like, a color scheme? Just so we have an idea in mind. I kind of like the traditional, like, red and green, but we could also try some sort of blue and white wintery colors. Or silver and gold, but that could look kind of dark in the ballroom, unless we got some lights. Oh, what about-”

She cut herself off as she looked up at Nico. Once again, his eyes were trained on his phone screen, as if she’d never said anything at all. Worst of all, there was a smile on his face, like the whole thing was amusing him.

Priya felt her mouth tighten into a line. Impulsively she snatched the papers from in front of him, quickly stuffing them into the folder.

“What are you doing?” 

She looked up, only to see Nico looking at her. He had the nerve to seem confused. 

“I’m going home,” she responded, gripping tightly to the folder as she stood, taking the long way around the table just so she didn’t have to step around him.

“You’re what?” Nico stood, following Priya as she left the room and began walking towards her desk. “Why? I was listening.”

“No, you weren’t!” she retorted sharply, finally turning around to face him. “I’m trying to get your opinions on this, because we’re supposed to be working together. Both of us. But instead you’re ignoring me, you just keep — texting your girlfriend, or whatever it is you’re doing.”

“I’m not texting my girlfriend,” Nico responded, his arms crossed across his chest.

“Then whoever it is! That’s not the point!” Priya groaned, running an exasperated hand through her hair. “The point is, I came here with ideas, and a checklist, and wanting to actually make this work. You show up late, which, fine, maybe you had something else to do, but then you turn down my ideas and you don’t even listen to me!”

“I told you, I was listening.”

“Were you? What was I just talking about, before I left?”

Nico opened his mouth, only for it to slowly shut. At the very least, he had the decency to look guilty over it.

“See? Exactly.” Priya sighed, beginning to walk backwards away from him. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll just… take care of everything.”

“But-”

“You won’t get in trouble. I’ll tell Dougie you had something come up.” She turned around, not wanting to hear any excuses he would somehow come up with. “It’s totally fine.”

“Priya...”

She didn’t turn back, walking back towards her desk, noting a lack of footsteps behind her. 

Well, she thought. Maybe Christmas miracles are in short supply this year.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

The next afternoon found Priya bursting through the office doors, trying to speed-walk as fast as possible to her desk. Her class had gone on fifteen minutes longer than usual, meaning she’d had to book it to the office the moment her professor had finally dismissed them. It certainly didn’t help her bad mood. 

Not that she was in a bad mood. She was totally fine. Chipper, even. She definitely hadn’t spent yesterday evening on the phone to her best friend Jack, ranting about how immensely frustrating a certain coworker of theirs was in between mouthfuls of leftover pasta. And she surely hadn’t been awake until three in the morning, trying to brainstorm ideas on how to throw a company holiday party so unbelievably kick-ass that it made said coworker feel like a fool for not helping out. That was for someone who hadn’t put the entire situation behind them. Like Priya had.

Priya turned the corner, brushing some wayward hair out of her face, only to stop in her tracks. There, pacing in front of her desk, dark eyes trained on the floor, was Nico.

“What are you doing?” Priya asked before she could stop herself.

Nico’s head jerked up as he halted his pacing, as if he’d been so lost in thought he hadn’t sensed her approach. “Oh. Um. Priya. Hi.”

“Hi,” Priya responded, trying to keep her voice even. (Not that there was any reason for it not to be. Because she wasn’t frustrated. At least, Nico didn’t need to know that she was.) “Any reason why you’re burning a line into the carpet?”

“Why I’m… what?” Nico asked, brow furrowed.

Priya sighed, crossing her arms. “Why are you at my desk? Don’t you have, like, computers to fix or something?”

“No. I mean, yes, I do, but…” Nico huffed out a breath, squaring his shoulders. “I wanted to apologize.”

Priya blinked over at him, trying to process the other’s words. “You what?”

“For yesterday. What happened.”

Letting out another sigh, Priya shook her head slightly. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it,” she muttered, moving past Nico to begin unpacking her bag.

“No, I-“

“If Dougie put you up to this, I’ll talk to him about it. I told him it wasn’t your fault.”

“Priya-”

“Listen, it’s totally fine,” Priya continued as she took out her lunch bag. “I’ll take care of everything. You don’t have to worry-”

“Can I just talk for a second?” Nico interjected. Priya’s eyes flickered up, only to be met with a look of desperation she didn’t think she’d ever seen on the other. Her mouth shut before she could say anything else. 

Nico let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair. “Sorry. I — Dougie didn’t talk to me. I came by myself.”

Priya’s eyebrows lifted slightly, but she kept silent. 

“It wasn’t right of me to ignore you like that,” Nico continued, his deep brown eyes soft as they met hers. “You came in with all of these ideas, and I just shot yours down. And then I ignored you while you were trying to help. It was rude. You deserve better than that. So. I’m sorry.”

Priya’s face softened as Nico spoke. She’d never heard the other sound so genuine. “Oh,” she murmured. “Th-thank you for apologizing. I appreciate it. It’s, um, it’s totally fine.”

“Thank you for being understanding,” he countered, the barest hint of a smile crossing his face. 

“No, I mean, I get it,” she let out a breath, taking a seat at her desk. “Some people just don’t, like, get into the season. Not everyone likes Christmas.”

“I like Christmas,” Nico spoke up quickly, hands slipping into his pockets. “It’s just…” He sighed. “It’s hard, sometimes. To get into the, what is it called? Holiday spirit?”

Priya hummed in confirmation, keeping her lips pressed together as she studied Nico’s face. “Do you genuinely want to help?”

“What’s that?” Nico questioned.

“Do you really want to help me out with the party? Like, you don’t just want to apologize and pretend nothing happened. You actually want to plan it together.”

Nico nodded, looking deadly serious, as if the task at hand was a thesis paper and not some office holiday gathering. “Yes. I actually do.”

Ignoring the strange twinge in her chest at his expression, Priya grabbed a sticky note and pen, scrawling down her phone number. “Do you work weekends?”

“No. Sometimes I have practice on Saturdays, but always early in the morning. Otherwise, I’m not busy.”

“Fantastic. Sunday then.” She scribbled down an address, handing over the sticky note. “Meet me there at 10?”

Nico studied the note, nodding firmly. “Okay. I’ll be there.” He smiled, holding out his pinky. “Promise.”

Priya stared at his offered hand for a moment before it clicked. She reached over, linking their pinky fingers together. 

Nico gave her one last smile before walking off, still studying the note as he disappeared around the corner.

“Huh,” Priya hummed, shrugging slightly as she went to set up her laptop. It wasn’t until a few minutes had gone by that she realized she was still smiling.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

Sunday morning came faster than Priya had expected, and she soon found herself sitting by one of the large windows in Woodland Coffee. The cafe was decked out in holiday cheer - there were stockings hung over the cozy fireplace, paper snowflakes dangling from the ceiling, and soft piano covers of Christmas songs playing over the speakers. Still, Priya’s focus kept drifting back and forth between the front door and her phone, its clock reading 9:59. 

Maybe this was all a set up, Priya thought to herself, sighing quietly as she began to scroll Instagram. Maybe he thought it would be funny to get my hopes up again, and then —

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps. She glanced up, only to see Nico rushing over to the table, cheeks pink from the cold.

“Hi,” he managed out, catching his breath as he unwound his scarf. “I hope you weren’t waiting too long. There was an accident on the main road, so I had to go around all these back streets, and I’m still not really used to the area —” 

“Hey,” Priya interrupted, holding up her hand. “It’s fine. It’s, like, 10:01. You’re not late.” 

Nico sighed in relief, smiling as he took off his hat, shaking out his hair. “This place is cute,” he commented, glancing around at all the decorations. “I don’t think I’ve been here before.”

“It’s my go-to,” Priya told him. “They’re a godsend around finals.”

“I’ll bet. What do you usually order?”

“Depends on the time of year. But their peppermint mocha is amazing.”

“Peppermint mocha, got it. Be right back.” Nico smiled, draping his jacket over the back of his chair before heading up to the counter. Priya found herself smiling back, pulling the red folder out of her bag.

Soon enough Nico returned, cautiously carrying two white mugs with red trim. “Here,” he nodded, lowering one of them in front of Priya’s seat. “Peppermint mocha, right?”

Priya’s eyes widened slightly. “I, um, yeah. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know,” Nico shrugged, taking a seat across from her, a soft smile on his face. He took a small sip of his drink, humming to himself.

“Good?” she asked, smiling.

“Mm. Very good,” he nodded. He took another sip before he sat up straighter, going to root through his backpack. “So, um, I did look up a couple things…” Nico pulled out a manila folder, opening it on the table, only for a few dozen clippings to come spilling out. “Or, um, more than a few,” he admitted, cheeks slightly pink.

“Whoa,” Priya let out a laugh, though she met his eyes to make sure he knew it wasn’t a mocking one. “That’s… wow. This’ll be great to work off.”

Nico smiled back, gesturing towards her folder. “But I want to see yours too. I liked some of the pictures you had. The ones with the string lights over the windows?”

“Oh, uh…” Priya flipped through the pages quickly, taking out one to place on the table. “This one, you mean?”

“Yeah, that one,” Nico said. “But I was thinking, maybe we could make them white lights instead? It would look good with whatever colors we used.”

Priya looked over the photo, slowly nodding. “Yeah. I like that. Plus it’s sort of dark in there, from what I can tell, so it might be best to have the brightest ones possible.”

“Speaking of the room. I was looking over some of the photos, and I think…” Nico took out the page he was referring to, pointing to the picture. “We could put the tables downstairs, and maybe use the second floor for something else. I don’t know what, though.”

“I was thinking maybe a photo booth?” Priya suggested, her eyes suddenly lighting up. “Or, oh my god, what if we got one of the managers to dress up as Santa?”

Nico let out a laugh, dimples showing through as he threw his head back. “Yes. We have to,” he insisted, getting out a pen to scribble down the idea. “And we can get Dougie to be an elf, because he’s so tall.” 

Priya found herself laughing along with Nico. “I don’t know if there’s a pair of tights in the world that would fit him.”

“Oh, we’ll find some,” Nico grinned cheekily.

The hours flew by quickly after that. By the time the clock struck noon, the two had planned out the decorations, the entertainment, the food and drink, and everything they had to do in the next few weeks to get everything done. In truth, they probably could have wrapped up faster if they’d kept their focus entirely on the party. But Nico kept interjecting with jokes and questions about her, and, well, Priya would be rude if she didn’t respond in kind.

“So I know you like to read and listen to music,” Nico hummed with a smile, drinking from his third mocha of the day. “Do you like any sports?”

“Oh, yeah,” Priya nodded. “Baseball, football and hockey.”

“I love hockey,” Nico grinned. 

“Really?” she smiled, taking a sip of her own drink. “Do you play or just watch?”

“Oh, no, I play for my college. I used to play football too.”

“You did? You don’t seem the type,” Priya commented.

“Why — oh, you mean American football. No, um, soccer. They call it football in Switzerland.”

Priya raised her eyebrows. “I never knew you were from Switzerland.”

Nico laughed. “The accent didn’t give it away?” 

“I’m not sure I’ve ever heard a Swiss accent before yours,” Priya countered with a smile. 

“That’s fair,” he chuckled, leaning back in his seat. “But yes. Born and raised.” 

Nico’s face seemed to grow almost forlorn as he spoke, eyes growing distant. Priya’s brow furrowed.

“Do you-”

“So-”

The two of them laughed, Nico shaking his head.

“You go.”

“No, you go,” Priya prompted, taking another sip of her mocha.

“Just… you said that you like to read,” Nico murmured, fidgeting with a stray pen. “If I was… looking for a book, to get for someone. What would you think?”

Priya thought the question over, putting a hand under her chin. “That’s a hard one. It depends on what they’re interested in. Nonfiction, or the classics, or mysteries.”

“What about you?” Nico asked, draining the last of his coffee cup.

“I mean, I’ve always loved Jane Austen,” Priya told him. “Something about her writing just makes me feel… hopeful, I guess. Like love like that can really exist.” She blushed, setting down her cup. “I bet that sounds silly.”

Nico made a noise of disagreement, his dark eyes studying her. “I don’t think it does,” he told her. “I think it’s nice. To think that way.”

Priya smiled shyly, taking a final sip from her mug. “Thanks.”

“Of course,” Nico smiled back, glancing down at his phone to check the time. “Oh, wow, it’s the middle of the afternoon. I should get going. But, um —” He stood, pulling on his coat. “You work all day on Tuesday, right?”

“No, Wednesdays and Fridays,” Priya offered, going to pack up her own belongings. 

“Okay, Wednesday then. On our lunch break. We can go out and grab some supplies?” Nico offered, putting away his folder. “Ask Dougie if we can steal a company credit card?”

Priya snickered, shaking her head. “I doubt that’ll happen. But, yeah, that sounds fun.” She was surprised at how much she genuinely meant it.

“Great.” Nico tore off a scrap of paper, writing something down and handing it over to Priya. “I’ll come by your desk at noon. Promise,” Nico smiled. He held out his pinky finger. This time, Priya knew to hook it with her own. 

“See you then!” Nico called as he left. He stopped right outside, then turned around, waving through the glass doors with a goofy grin.

Priya let out a laugh, waving back at him. As he walked off, she glanced down at the paper, finding a phone number with a smiley face drawn next to it. Though she didn’t know it, her own smile grew to match it.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

“What’s the difference between these?” Nico called, his brow furrowed in confusion.

Priya glanced up from her checklist, rolling the shopping cart over to where Nico was standing. Thankfully the aisles weren’t too full, given it was noon on a weekday. “Between what?”

“These,” he repeated, showing her two boxes of string lights. “They look the same.”

Priya studied the packaging, pointing to the one in Nico’s left hand. “I think this one is more of a warm white, like, tan almost. This one is cooler, almost blue.”

Nico looked between both packages, frowning as he did so. “I still don’t see a difference,” he admitted.

Priya giggled, taking a few boxes of the cooler lights and putting them into the cart, checking off the box on her list. “Okay, so that’s all set… I think all we need is the candy for the dessert table and we’ll be good to go.”

She’d come up with the idea when Jack had approached her, asking if he could bring something to represent Hanukkah to the holiday party. “I’m a horrible cook, but I’ve made jelly donuts a couple times and haven’t burned down the whole kitchen,” Jack had told her with a laugh. Something had clicked, and she’d quickly fired off a message to Nico, asking what he thought. Thankfully, he loved it.

Thus far, they’d had five sign-ups to bring homemade desserts — mini pies, gingerbread bars, peppermint bark fudge, snickerdoodles and Jack’s jelly donuts. Priya had already bought the ingredients for chocolate chip cookies, though she wasn’t sure if eight dozen was too few.

She snapped out of her worries when she suddenly recognized Nico humming along to the store radio, making her laugh. “You like Mariah Carey?”

“Hmm? Oh,” Nico laughed sheepishly as they strolled through the store. “Yeah. I’m not a huge fan of Christmas music, but… I like this song. I like that it’s more about wishing for someone rather than something.”

“That’s sweet,” Priya smiled at him, heart fluttering slightly (though she couldn’t quite place why).

She thought over Nico’s words as they walked down the crafts aisle, glancing around at the crayons and construction paper. Suddenly she gasped, stopping in her tracks.

“What?” Nico asked, turning around with a worried expression.

“I just had an idea,” she rushed out, going to grab a pile of forest green construction paper. “What if we made a wishing tree? Like, we made a tree out of construction paper and hung it up on the wall, and we made little paper ornaments. And people could come over and write their holiday wishes on them, and hang them up on the tree?”

Nico froze for a moment, letting out a soft laugh. “You just came up with that?”

“Yeah,” Priya nodded, shoulders lowering as she looked over at him. “I — is it -”

“It’s brilliant,” Nico reassured her, eyes sparkling. “Beyond brilliant. I’m just — I’m surprised you came up with that so fast. But, yes. Definitely. We should.” He went to grab red and white construction paper, along with some colorful markers. “You’re really good at this.”

Priya blushed, shrugging slightly. “I mean, you gave me the idea.”

“I think Mariah Carey came up with it to begin with,” Nico joked, putting their supplies into the cart. “We should send her a thank-you gift.”

Priya laughed, walking alongside Nico as he took over cart-pushing duties. “Speaking of gifts, have you bought all of yours yet? I’m still trying to figure out what to get my parents.”

Nico didn’t reply. Priya looked over, only to see his jaw tightened, the same forlorn expression on his face from when they’d talked about his home at the coffee shop.

“Oh, does — does your family not do gifts?”

“No, they… they do,” Nico told her, voice low. “Just… they’re all back home. My family, I mean. They’re all in Switzerland. So it would… it would take a while for any gifts to get to them.”

“Oh.” Priya stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets. “Well, I mean, you can give them the next time you visit, right? A late gift is still a gift.”

“I don’t know when that will be,” Nico admitted. “Plane tickets are expensive. And there’s still work, and school… it’s hard to find time to talk to anyone back home, let alone go and see them.”

“Yeah,” Priya nodded, biting her inner lip. It makes sense why he wasn’t into planning this, she thought, with everyone far away. “So, um… when you are home, for Christmas. What’s it like? In Switzerland? Is it much different from here?”

“I’ve only celebrated Christmas here once, and it was just with a few friends from the team,” Nico told her with a slight shrug. “But at home, we don’t set up the tree early like you guys do sometimes. The parents decorate it the night before Christmas Eve, and in the morning you come downstairs and see it. They used to tell us the elves did it.” He let out a laugh. “And then we usually have ham and raclette. Like, melty cheese, with potatoes. And my mom will make spitzbuben.”

“Spitzbuben,” she repeated with a slight laugh. “I like that word.”

“It’s like, um… jam cookies,” Nico told her after a moment’s thought. “They’re always so good.”

Priya’s face lit up as she nudged Nico’s arm. “You should make them for the party!”

“Me?” Nico asked, eyes widening. “Oh, no, I — I’m terrible at making food.”

“I can help you out,” she told him. “Ask your mom for the recipe. You can come over when I’m making the chocolate chip ones. Tackle them together.”

Nico’s smile slowly grew as he nodded. “Okay. If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Priya smiled back, her chest hit with that same strange feeling as earlier. Shaking her head slightly to reset herself, she cleared her throat. “So, when do you give the gifts?”

“Oh, um, not… not on actual Christmas,” Nico told her, running a hand through his hair as they approached the food section. “Samichlaus — that’s what we call Santa. He comes on the 6th of December.”

“Really?” Priya asked. She was about to turn down the candy aisle when a realization hit her, making her stop in her tracks.

“Priya?” Nico asked, voice suddenly filled with concern. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she answered after a moment. “Yeah, I… I’m really sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?” Nico questioned, hands in his jean pockets. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“No, I…” she sighed. “December 6th. That was the day we met, right? I mean… when we had our first meeting. About the party.”

Nico nodded slightly, face still reading confusion.

“You — I was so mad because you weren’t paying attention to me,” Priya sighed, guilt pooling in her stomach. “But you… you were probably texting your family, right?”

Nico was silent as she spoke, slowly nodding again. “Yeah. Yeah, my… my family was sending me messages. And some of my friends from back home.”

“God, Nico,” Priya whispered, letting out a sigh. “You could have said something. I would have understood.”

“I thought it was silly,” Nico confessed after a moment. “To be sad about missing something so… childish.”

“It’s not silly if it means something to you,” Priya told him, placing a hand on his upper arm. “I should have asked.”

Nico nodded slightly, meeting her eyes. “I should have said something. Or at least, not been so much of a jerk to you.”

“You weren’t a jerk-”

“No, I was. I didn’t — I took my feelings out on you. I didn’t want to even think about Christmas, and you had all these great ideas, and you were so happy about it… it wasn’t right of me to act how I did. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too,” Priya sighed, slowly lowering her arm to wrap around her waist. 

“You don’t have to be,” Nico told her, this time raising his hand to pat her shoulder. “It’s okay. You’ve done so much. And your ideas are incredible.”

Priya let out a shy laugh. “I try.”

“I’m glad you do,” Nico smiled, patting her shoulder once more before turning back to the cart. “Come on. We can get some candy for the drive home too.”

Priya smiled back. “Well, I mean, if you insist.”

“I do,” Nico grinned, the two of them making their way down the aisle.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

Priya tightened her jacket around herself, shivering as she stepped out of the grocery store into the blustery air. When she’d gone shopping for supplies for her and Nico’s baking session, she’d thought a dozen eggs would be enough for the chocolate chip and Swiss Jam cookies. What she hadn’t counted on was burning the first batch of chocolate chip, then struggling with separating the yolk from the white for the spitzbuben, then Nico tripping and dropping two of the eggs onto the kitchen floor.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to get them?” Nico had asked, trying to mop up the splattered mess. “I feel bad sending you out into the cold.”

“It’s fine. There’s a store, like, two blocks from here. It won’t take me long,” Priya promised him, giggling internally at the kicked-puppy look of guilt he wore. “Just make sure the ones in the oven now don’t get burnt.” 

Now that Priya was thinking it over, it probably wasn’t the smartest idea to leave someone she’d only known for a few weeks alone in her apartment.  Particularly not someone who, before they’d started planning together, she’d been sure held some sort of personal vendetta against her. But things had changed. Nico was still quiet at times, but always in a way she could tell was considerate of the world around him. His eyes held the same intensity, but it no longer scared her away. There were still those instances of strange fluttering in her chest from time to time, but Priya refused to focus on those. Not while there was still so much to do before the party.

As Priya pressed the call button to cross the street, she suddenly noticed a collection of bright lights to her left. A row of booths had been set up along the sidewalk in a miniature Christmas market, with a dozen or so shoppers meandering between the string-lit tents. She could see some children stepping away from one with paper cups of hot chocolate and cider.

Priya glanced down at her phone to check the time, shrugging slightly. Though she’d gotten almost all her holiday shopping done, it couldn’t hurt to poke around. Besides, if nothing else, maybe she could bring Nico back some hot drinks to share.

She ducked her head entering the first tent, seeing it filled with fuzzy scarves and gloves. Reaching her free hand up to stroke the fabrics, mindful of her grocery bag, she walked further in, seeing a collection of multicolored, handknit beanies. They reminded her of Nico, she thought with a slight laugh. He’d worn the same black winter hat every time she’d seen him the past month. 

Maybe he could use a new one, she thought. Would he like the red, or — 

Priya paused in surprise at herself, pulling her hand back from the display. She hadn’t been planning on buying Nico a gift. They weren’t close like that — or were they now? They’d spent almost every day together since their shopping trip, sitting at the same lunch table and working on crafting the wish tree display. But that was just because of the party, wasn’t it? Once it had passed, they wouldn’t be attached to each other like they were now. Then again, more often than not their conversations had drifted away from planning, to music and sports and funny stories from each others’ pasts. She didn’t want that part to end. She — she liked Nico.

Biting her lip, head still spinning from the revelation, Priya turned away from the hat display, instead studying a glass display table of different jewelry. Her eyes scanned over the different earrings and bracelets, only to stop once they caught sight of a necklace. Hanging from black cord was a small gold-colored coin, two intertwining flowers etched into the metal.

“You like it?” 

Priya’s head jerked up, only to meet a smiling older woman in a purple headscarf. “It’s edelweiss.”

“Edelweiss?” Priya repeated, eyes returning to the necklace. 

“Yes. A flower that grows in the Alps,” the woman told her. “Very popular in those countries. Austria, Romania, Switzerland.”

Priya’s heart jolted in her chest, studying the coin, the way the flowers’ stems wrapped around one another.

“How — how much?”

A few minutes later, Priya carefully opened the front door of her apartment, two large cups of hot chocolate in hand.

“There you are,” Nico sighed, relief clear on his face as he made his way to the front door. “I was about to call you. Did you get caught up in something?”

“Just thought I’d stop for these,” Priya shrugged, handing over one of the cups to him. 

“Oh, wow. Thanks,” Nico smiled at her, his dimples clear as he took the grocery bag as well. “You’re the best.”

Priya let out a shy laugh. She glanced up towards Nico, watching as he walked back into the kitchen and ran a hand through his dark hair. He really is handsome, she thought. And sweet. And passionate. And —

“Priya?” Nico called, making her snap out of her thoughts. “You okay?”

“Yep! Yeah, sorry. Give me one second,” she smiled over at him. She turned to hang up her coat by the door, taking just a moment to reach into her pocket, running her fingers over the small crimson gift box. 

Not tonight, she thought. But soon. Probably. Maybe.

Taking a deep breath, Priya turned back towards Nico, smiling wide. “Okay. Let’s do this.”

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

The date of the Christmas party finally arrived. Priya had spent most of the day setting up the ballroom with Nico, securing the decorations and making sure the caterers had everything they needed. A few times she’d glanced over at Nico, a confession she wasn’t sure how to phrase on the top of her tongue, but she’d always swallowed it back. If she was going to completely embarrass herself in front of a cute boy, she was going to do it right. 

After a well-deserved nap, Priya had gotten to work preparing herself for the party. Instead of her usual uniform of sweatpants and a hoodie, she’d decided on one of her nicest outfits: a knee-length, deep green sparkly dress with long sleeves, paired with silver flats. She’d done her hair in a low bun, securing it with a velvet green bow, romantic tresses framing her face. She kept her makeup basic, but made sure to use her favorite red lipstick, double checking to make sure none had gotten on her teeth.

Priya did a spin in front of her bedroom mirror, smiling at herself. It wasn’t too often she got a chance to dress up — a fact she was largely grateful for — but it was still fun when the moment came.

Grabbing her handbag, her eyes drifted over to the burgundy jewelry box, still sitting atop her dresser. Was it even a good idea to give it? Would it be overstepping? What if he thought it was cheesy? What if it made him miss home even more? What if —

A knock on the door made Priya’s head jolt up, brow furrowed. She hadn’t been expecting anyone. Before she could think better of it, she grabbed the box, shoving it into her bag.

“Coming!” she called, making her way down the hallway to open the front door.

Standing there, in a deep red shirt and black tie, was Nico. “Hi,” he managed out, his voice sounding shyer than Priya could ever remember it. 

“Hi,” Priya responded, her voice soft to match his.

Nico looked Priya up and down, his cheeks pale pink. “You, um… you look beautiful.”

Priya’s own cheeks flushed. “Thank you,” she smiled shyly. “You look nice too. Very handsome.”

“Thanks.” Nico bit his lip, moving his hands from behind his back, handing out a bouquet of white and red flowers. “I… these are for you.”

Priya felt her heart leap as she took the bouquet, inhaling the sweet aroma. “Garden roses,” she whispered, meeting his eyes. “I love them. How did you know?”

“I, um, I might’ve asked Jack,” Nico admitted, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. “Just… you’ve been so great with everything, and… I wanted to thank you.”

Priya smiled, stepping forward to pull Nico into a hug. She could feel him tense in surprise for a moment, only to wrap his arms around her waist, chin resting on her shoulder. He smelled like warmth, and cinnamon, and the slightest bit of pine. She could already imagine herself getting addicted.

“Thank you,” Priya murmured into his shirt, closing her eyes for a moment. “You’re… you’re wonderful. Really.”

“I try,” Nico let out a soft laugh.

After a few seconds too long, Priya forced herself to pull away, shyly laughing. “I’ll, um, I’ll go put these in water.”

“Yeah,” Nico nodded, clearing his throat. “Yeah, no worries.”

Priya had gotten only a few steps away when a thought hit her, making her turn to face him. “What are you doing here, anyway? I thought you’d be at the party.”

“I am. I mean, I’m going. I just thought, maybe I could drive you. If you don’t have other plans.”

Priya smiled softly. “Yeah. Yeah, no, I’d love that.” She put the flowers onto the kitchen counter, making her way back to the doorway. “Jack said he’d drive me home, but I’ll just tell him to meet me there.”

“You sure?” Nico raised his eyebrows worriedly. “You don’t have to. I mean — I should have asked you first —”

“Nico. It’s fine,” Priya reassured him. “I want to go with you.”

Nico’s smile practically lit up her insides as he nodded. “Okay. If you’re sure.” He offered his arm, putting on a slightly goofy formal voice. “Shall we, my lady?”

“We shall, good sir,” she giggled, taking his arm as they made their way outside.

⋆⁺₊⋆ ❄ ⁺₊⋆ ❄ ₊⁺ ⋆

Even though she’d spent most of the day setting up for the party, Priya still found herself unprepared by how beautiful the ballroom had ended up. From her spot on the second floor balcony, she could watch the string lights glow, illuminating the smiling faces of the people below. She spied one of the tech heads, Miles, dressed up in a full Santa suit, taking photos with the marketing team. The playlist she and Nico had crafted was playing softly through the speakers, adding a pleasant hum to the whole scene. Somehow, everything had worked out.

Priya gazed over the crowd, only for her eyes to stop on a familiar face. Nico smiled at her from his place near the dessert table, motioning her down. She grinned back, nodding quickly as she made her way downstairs, carefully maneuvering around the guests.

“Hey,” she smiled, nudging Nico with her elbow. 

“Hey.” Nico let out a soft sigh, glancing around at the crowd. “We pulled it off.”

“I know,” Priya sighed with him. “Is it weird to say I’m proud of us?”

Nico glanced over, shaking his head slightly. “I don’t think it’s weird. Not at all.”

Priya’s eyes softened as she nudged him again. “Then I am. I’m proud of us. And you.”

“Me?” Nico laughed in disbelief.

“Yeah, you. I know it wasn’t the easiest thing for you, but… you really stepped up. I couldn’t have done any of this without you.”

“Well, I couldn’t have even gotten started without you,” Nico pointed out. “So. I’m proud of you, too.”

Their eyes met, the rest of the world seeming a distant blur.

“Nico-”

“Hey-”

They both laughed.

“You first,” Nico gestured towards her.

“No, no, it’s fine. You go,” she nodded.

“Just, I have to head out pretty soon,” Nico admitted, scratching the back of his head. 

Priya frowned slightly. “Oh. Do you want me to come with you?”

“No, no, stay and have fun. You’ve earned it,” Nico assured her, patting her shoulder. “I just wanted to let you know. Jack said he could drive you back, right? So you won’t be walking in the cold?”

“Yeah,” Priya nodded after a moment. “Yeah, no, I’ll just have to go find him.”

“Okay.” Nico smiled. A few seconds of silence passed between them. Priya bit her cheek, feeling her heart begin to pound in her chest.

Without warning, Nico stepped forward, pulling her into a tight hug. Priya closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around him, letting out a deep sigh. 

Eventually they pulled apart, Nico’s smile seeming to have a tinge of melancholy to it. “See you around,” he nodded.

“I — yeah. See you around,” she forced out, managing a smile. Priya let herself watch for just a moment as Nico made his way through the crowd. Then, straightening her shoulders, she turned around, beginning to search the room for Jack.

She found him not too far away, chatting with Dougie. “Hey, Prius!” Jack grinned, pulling her into a hug. “Did you have one of the donuts yet?”

“Not yet,” Priya admitted, laughing as she pulled apart. “But soon.”

“Amazing job with the party, Priya,” Dougie nodded.

Priya shrugged modestly. “It would’ve been better if we could have found you an elf costume that fit.”

“Wasn’t meant to be,” Dougie laughed, Jack chuckling along with him. “You know, I have to say, I wasn’t sure at first when Nico came to me asking to work with you. But you guys really came together.”

Priya’s eyes widened slightly. “He what?”

“Didn’t he tell you?” Dougie’s brow furrowed. “He came to me begging for me to put you on party planning with him. I knew you could handle it, but I always thought you two didn’t get along.”

“We didn’t,” Priya managed out, voice hitching. “Can you, um… will you excuse me a sec?”

Without waiting for an answer, Priya walked away, her head spinning. This whole time, she’d thought that she and Nico had been thrown together by some twist of fate, or that Dougie had wanted to minimize the tension between them. Nico had really asked for her? Why?

Priya was drawn out of her thoughts just enough to stare at the wishing tree she and Nico had assembled. It wasn’t too full yet, with only a few red and white baubles attached to the construction paper tree. Almost instantly, though, her eyes were drawn towards one particular ornament, with handwriting that felt all too familiar.

I wish I could tell her how I really feel.

Her heart stopped in her chest. Everything seemed to stop; the world became a blur. Before another thought crossed her mind, Priya found herself rushing out of the ballroom, hurrying as fast as she could towards the parking lot. Thankfully, there was still a figure standing outside of his car, wearing a familiar black winter hat.

“Nico!” Priya cried, running towards him. “Nico, wait!”

Nico turned around, brows drawn tightly together as he noticed her. “Priya? What are you doing out here? Can Jack not-”

“Be… be quiet for a second,” Priya told him, catching her breath as she finally approached the car.

“Priya, I don’t -”

“What did your wish mean?”

Nico’s brow furrowed further. “What wish?”

“The one you wrote on the tree,” Priya clarified, crossing her arms. “You said… you said you wish you could tell someone how you really feel. What does that mean?”

Nico’s eyes widened, a guilty expression taking over his face. “That — I — I didn’t think you would know that was mine.”

“I know your handwriting by now,” Priya pointed out. 

There was a beat of silence before she sighed.

“I don’t — I don’t get it. You hate me. Or you — you did hate me. Why-”

“I never hated you,” Nico murmured.

“Then why did you always stare me down? Why wouldn’t you just talk to me?”

He let out a soft sigh, staring down at the pavement. “I was scared,” he confessed. “You were so… so beautiful, and smart. And you just… you lit up the room every time you walked in. And I was just this… this boy who barely spoke English, and I was so afraid of saying the wrong thing.”

Priya’s face softened, her arms drifting down to her side. “Is that why you asked Dougie to work with me?”

Nico winced for a moment at having been found out, but slowly nodded. “I thought… it would be an excuse to get to know you better. And to spend more time with you. And I messed it up, because I was too in my own head. But you gave me a second chance, and…” He let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair as he glanced up to meet her eyes, his own dark and anxiety-filled. “I know it… it sounds foolish. But I thought…”

“Nico,” Priya whispered, stepping forward. Biting her lip, she quickly rustled through her bag, handing over the jewelry box.

Nico’s brow furrowed. “What… what is this?”

“It’s for you. For Christmas.”

Nico slowly removed the lid, carefully removing the necklace. “Edelweiss,” he whispered in awe, turning to look at her.

“I got it a few days ago,” Priya confessed, her cheeks pink. “I just… I thought of you. And I thought of… how sweet you are, and how supportive you’ve been, and how easy it is for you to make me laugh. And I-”

“Priya.”

Nico stepped forward, slowly closing the gap between them. Priya’s heart raced as he reached his hand up to cup her cheek. “Priya,” he repeated softly, before leaning in, closing the gap between their lips.

Priya felt her chest burst open, moving to wrap her arms around his neck. She’d never imagined a kiss in a freezing cold parking lot could feel so perfect.

Nico was smiling when he finally pulled away, his eyes sparkling. “Wow,” he let out a short laugh.

“Wow,” Priya repeated, a giggle rising in her throat. 

Nico leaned in once again, only to be interrupted by his phone vibrating in his pocket. “Damnit,” he cursed, quickly pulling it out. “That’ll be Jonas.”

“Jonas?” she asked, hands still on his shoulders. 

“My friend from Switzerland,” he told her. “I… after we talked about it, I went online and got a flight home. I’m leaving tonight.”

“Oh,” Priya gasped, her eyes wide. She pulled her hands away, shoving at him gently. “Oh my god, then, go, go! Don’t miss your flight!”

“Wait, wait,” Nico laughed, grabbing at her hands to hold them. “I have something for you first.”

“What?” Priya asked, a wide smile still on her face. 

“One second.” Nico quickly turned around, opening the back door of his car, pulling out a box wrapped in royal blue paper. “For you,” he offered with a smile.

“Nico,” Priya grinned. “You didn’t have to get me anything.” 

“I wanted to,” Nico countered. “Besides, you got me something.”

“But that was just something small, and you already got me flowers-”

“You’re going to make me miss my flight,” Nico teased, smirking.

Sighing, Priya carefully removed the paper, only to let out a gasp. “Is this… you got me the entire Jane Austen collection?”

“I noticed you didn’t have any on your shelves at your apartment,” he shrugged sheepishly. “And I… I got a set for myself too. Not as nice as those, but I thought… Maybe we could read them together. See what gives you, what was it… hope? For love?”

Priya’s heart fluttered as she placed the books on the hood of Nico’s car, throwing her arms around him again. “I love them. Thank you so much,” she whispered.

“Of course. And thank you. For everything,” Nico whispered back, turning his face so he could kiss her cheek.

The sound of a phone buzzing made them both groan, though they giggled as they pulled apart. 

“I really should get going,” Nico sighed, handing Priya back her book collection. “I fly back on the 2nd of January. Can we — can we talk then, maybe?”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course,” Priya smiled. “And I have your phone number, so I can FaceTime you. If you want.”

“I’ll always want to see you,” Nico admitted, smiling shyly.

Priya pulled Nico into another kiss, her hand venturing up to stroke a thumb over his cheek. “January 2nd,” she whispered as she pulled apart.

“January 2nd,” he nodded, holding out his pinky finger. She quickly looped hers with his, cheeks flushing red as he leaned down to kiss her knuckles.

“I’ll see you then,” Nico smiled. “Merry Christmas, Priya.”

“Merry Christmas, Nico.”

One more hug, one more kiss, and then he was off, car disappearing into the night.

Priya watched him go, feeling warmer than she’d ever felt. Quickly she took out her phone, moving towards her calendar app. Eleven days, she thought. I can make it that long. 

Slipping her phone back into her bag, Priya let out a blissful sigh. She glanced down at the books in her hand, stroking a finger over the spines, before she began to make her way back towards the ballroom.

I guess I was right, she thought with a smile. Miracles really do happen all the time.

[wyattjohnston]

and just like that, the exchange has come to an end! thank you to everybody who participated—all 43 people!

if you take the time to read these fics, take the extra minute to reblog it and let the writer know how much you enjoyed it. the only way to spread things on tumblr is to reblog them. likes don't get the word out there!

please respect all warnings at the beginning of fics. if a fic has been marked as smut or 18+ and you are younger than, do the right thing and do not read it.

keep your eye out for the summer fic exchange 2k23 sign up post. if you want me to let you know when it's happening you can click here.

the winter fic exchange 2k23 masterlist

Buffalo Sabres

Tyson Jost

- A Christmas 3+1 by @2manytabsopen for @ bqstqnbruin

- cooler by @jostystyles for @ butgilinsky

- it's always the boy next door by @ya-pucking-nerd for @ ilyasorokin

- Slowly, Then All at Once by @color-offside-the-lines for @ jostystyles

Carolina Hurricanes

Andrei Svechnikov

- All I've Tried to Hide by @laurenairay for @ hoesforthecanes

- The Myster of Love by @comphy-and-cozy for @ idontgiveaflyinggrayson69

Colorado Avalanche

Cale Makar

- i love you, grumpy by @nylwnder for @ gravestrain

- tell me you want it a thousand miles away from the day that we started by @fallinallincurls for @ hockeylvr59

- Unexpected Love by @buttercupjosh for @ wildrangers

JT Compher

- this song is about you by @torontoflames for @ comphy-and-cozy

Nathan Mackinnon

- I Got You by @hockeylvr59 for @ raysofcrosby

- The Problem with Maddie by @luvsherleafs for @ fallinallincurls

- you always did feel just like home by @wyattjohnston for @ blueskrugs

Minnesota Wild

Kirill Kaprizov

- Christmas With You by @raysofcrosby for @ callsign-denmark

Montreal Canadiens

Josh Anderson

- promise this won’t change a thing by @matthewtkachuk for @ luvsherleafs

Juraj Slavkovksy

- second times the charm by @ilyasorokinn for @ lam-ila

New Jersey Devils

Jack Hughes

- sweet nothing by @gravestrain for @ quinnshuggy

Nico Hischier

- be my fire in the cold by @tinyhockey for @ lifeofpriya

New York Islanders

Anders Lee

- Welcome Home by @idontgiveaflyinggrayson69 for @ barzysunflower

Anthony Beauvillier

- holiday cards by @fear-of-flyers for @ buttercupjosh

- It Was Real For Me by @lam-ila for @ sorryjustafangirl

- tell me that you'll open your eyes by @liquidflyer for @ 2manytabsopen

Mat Barzal

- comin' home to you by @quinnshuggy for @ color-offside-the-lines

- Last Christmas by @bitchinbarzal for @ liquidflyer

- New Year's Surprise by @barzysunflower for @ bitchingbarzal

- Sparks Fly by @hoesforthecanes for @ tinyhockey

Seattle Kraken

Andre Burakovsky

- They Shoot Websters, Don't They? by @bqstqnbruin for @ laurenairay

Jamie Oleksiak

- i won't say (i'm in love) by @barkbarkbeauvillier for @ jxmieoleksiaks

- seizing the moment by @butgilinsky for @ typical-simplelove

- the untitled date day by @jxmieoleksiaks for @ barkbarkbeauvillier

- Untitled by @selfindulgentpoorlywritten by @ tippedbykreider

St Louis Blues

Colton Parayko

- something just like this by @tippedbykreider for @ senditcolton

Toronto Maple Leafs

Mitch Marner

- won't you stay til the a.m? by @senditcolton for @ fear-of-flyers

Morgan Rielly

- babe for the weekend by @sorryjustafangirl for @ broadstbroskis

William Nylander

- choosing you by @broadstbroskis for @ nylwnder

Vancouver Canucks

Brock Boeser

- fools rush in by @pcttymcrlecu for @ torontoflames

Elias Pettersson

- here comes your man by @thomasschabot for @ selfindulgentpoorlywritten

- Home by @wildrangers for @ thomasschabot

- Nervous by @typical-simplelove for @ ya-pucking-nerd

Quinn Hughes

- More than a Memory by @blueskrugs for @ matthewtkachuk

- What the Heart Wants by @lifeofpriya for @ pcttymarleau

Washington Capitals

TJ Oshie

- What We Had by @callsign-denmark for @ cellythefloshie

Winnipeg Jets

Adam Lowry

- Last Christmas by @cellythefloshie for @ wyattjohnston

if you wrote a fic and the person you wrote it for did not reblog it, tell me! if you know you haven't reblogged the fic written for you (and left some nice comments!), please go do that now.

ANONYMOUS EXCHANGE FEEDBACK

[pcttymcrlecu]

fools rush in (and i've been a fool before)

inspired kind-of by: please don’t say you love me by gabrielle aplin

summary: previous fears, heavy words and a fear of change hinders the spark that turned lilah’s heart into summer despite the long canadian winter.

featuring: lilah j. winters (oc) and the vancouver canucks, namely bo horvat, holly horvat, tulsa horvat, milo boeser and coolie boeser

word count: 4k

warnings: none 

m’s rambles: this is for @antoineroussel​’s winter fic exchange 2023. i was given the joy of writing for @torontoflames​ so i hope you enjoy this c!! i spent so long going back and forth hoping to create something worthy to gift to you! it was surprisingly really difficult - not sure i made it as angsty/hurt-comfort as i wanted to but i still hope you enjoy it!

big big thank you to demi for quelling my fears and uncertainties as well as giving me some much needed second opinion on the fic. it’s so very much appreciated!!

i hope you enjoy this semi-personal piece of work – it’s inspired roughly by a relationship/situation i had when i first went to university, so it was cathartic for me to get this out there. there’s a line in here that this someone said to me, and i had to use it. like it’s something and it’s stuck with me, and i needed to make way for it in something i wrote, and this was apparently it. i wonder if you can figure out which line it is.

Lilah had grown up around athletes her whole life which had led to her interest in working with them as a grown-up. When she moved to university, she had somehow cemented herself a place amongst the college athletes in her year by pure chance which made her life easier in the later years of her university career. As cheesy as it sounds, they’d all become like brothers to her and for that, she was more than happy to have found them.

When a fortunate internship program for her chosen career as a sports psychologist had brought Bo Horvat into her life, she never expected to become an honorary Horvat. It had taken mere moments for Bo to claim the young woman, who at the time was a nervous wreck, as his sister and quickly took her under his wing. She would be lying to say she didn’t appreciate having someone on her side in such a daunting and intimidating situation. He took his responsibilities as a big brother seriously and she couldn’t thank him enough for his kindness.

Knowing Bo Horvat came with knowing the rest of the Vancouver Canucks, thus a whole host of new brothers were introduced to her world. Most of whom were happy to play protective big brother when needed on nights out. Their partners gave her a welcome reprieve from all the testosterone whenever she’d see them around to the point where she began to receive invites to brunches and casual hangouts. It was a whole new circle that she could never have dreamed of being a part of and yet when she’d pinch herself, they didn’t fade, and the woman would be lying if she said it didn’t make her feel all warm inside.

Lilah considered herself a woman of strong will and wasn’t one to swoon over any of the players just because of who they were. She thought she’d created strong defences against their so-called charm considering how long she’d been around the flirtatious tendencies of young athletes and yet here she caught herself floating off the ground slightly at the sight of a certain blond. Her eyes were scanning the scene happening in the garden, bobbing gently with Tulsa in her arms in an attempt to give her parents some free time to just exist as a couple, not parents. She loved taking care of them, being their self-proclaimed favourite aunt, and team barbeques like this gave her all the time in the world to cuddle them.  They also gave her the time to observe the man who had unwittingly swept her right off her feet by simply playing around his pair of canine friends.

When she had first met Brock, it had been during one of her training sessions at Thunderbird Arena when she had been introduced to him. He was one of the players she hadn’t met directly through Bo but rather through the very reason she was even allowed to wander around the players in the first place. They hadn’t spoken much; she was mainly there to observe and had made a vow to stay out of the players' way if she didn’t need to interact with them so as to not bother them. It wasn’t until they’d run into each other once again at a dinner party Holly had convinced Bo to throw that they had slipped into surprisingly easy conversation.

Most likely due to the closeness in their age, the two of them got along like a house of fire. Both fed off each other as they supported one another throughout their careers. She had found a safe space in confiding in the hockey player and was more than happy to be there to listen not as a training professional but simply as a friend. The easiness of their friendship should have been a clear warning sign for the woman but as time progressed she couldn’t spot the signs of things changing until it was too late. It felt like all the air had been stolen from her lungs when the reality of her feelings had finally been processed in her mind. She had left that gathering abruptly, claiming she had a report deadline she had forgotten about before disappearing. 

It was a mistake she had made before and she had sworn to herself she wouldn’t date a young athlete ever again, no matter how endearing and kind they seemed. It was almost as if life had intended for her to date one of the university athletes, after all, she spent as much time with them as she did with her actual friends. If you asked her now, she’d say it was nothing but an unfortunate situation and that she doesn’t hold any resentment towards him. But the hurt which was fed by predominantly fear remained. She knew that Brock would never be the kind of person who would humiliate her in the same way it happened in the past, but she couldn’t quite let go of what-ifs that plagued her mind. She wasn’t going to make the same mistake – not at the risk of her newfound friends.

What made it worse was as her feelings began to process in her mind, all their friends teasing came back to haunt her. The two of them were practically as thick as thieves regardless of how short a time they had known each other and the more she thought about it, the more she could see exactly why her friends were constantly teasing them. What she dismissed once as feeling comfortable and safe with Brock, while all true, she could now acknowledge the underlying reasons behind why everything with him just felt right. Lilah hadn’t realised how far they’d progressed entirely subconsciously, and she wasn’t sure how exactly she should feel about but she wasn’t comfortable anymore.

The following weeks were nothing but declined invites and unanswered phone calls. The only times her friends were able to see her were when they were all at work and it was nothing but professionalism when they were able to speak to her. It wasn’t until Holly turned up at her apartment door with a concerned look on her face and open arms that the truth finally came out. The older woman promised not to tell anyone not even her husband until Lilah did so herself.

From that moment, it was slow going to become part of the group once again. None of her friends mentioned her absence rather they just adopted her back into the pack as if nothing had happened. Getting comfortable around Brock, however, was much more difficult for her. She didn’t want to slip back into their old routine, it was dangerous for her because she wasn’t sure how long she’d be able to hold off being near him again. It had taken a much longer length of time, many bribes and an ambush movie night with Milo and Coolie for her to fall back into a comfortable routine with the boy. She still claimed that the puppies did all the heavy lifting that evening.

The same pup that now had an insistent wet nose against her knee, gently pawing at her leg demanding attention. For an excitable young dog Milo who nearly always wanted to do nothing else but play, he was always very aware of young children as he was being so around the baby in Lilah’s arms right now. The dog’s presence, however, clued her into the man who was walking in her direction.

“Hello Prince Charming,” She greeted as he huffed sitting down in the seat beside her, taking a moment to coo at the little girl before rolling his eyes.

“Get off it,” His grumble came, Milo making quick work of getting pets from his dad before wandering off to play with his brother and the other dogs loose in the garden.

“The resemblance is uncanny Boeser you can’t deny it.” She sighed as she leaned over to give the man a gentle push, “I’ll never be able to watch Shrek the same ever again.” 

The laugh that followed was cut short as she paused a moment to look down at the small peaceful face against her chest. Smiling over at him, Lilah took a moment to watch the false frustration on his face fall as he smiled back at her with a good-natured shake of his head. 

“I should have chosen another movie to force you to watch,”

“You shouldn’t have forced me to watch anything!”

“And risk losing my newest friend, no thanks.” Her eyes rolled at his words, a strange tightness building in her chest at what she knew was supposed to be a friendly quip. 

In isolating herself, while it allowed her to wrap her head around the craziness of her own feelings, she had strained the relationships she would say she had been gifted. The whole process was entirely selfish of her, and she hadn’t taken a single moment to consider how it would make her new friends feel.

“You mean a lot more to me than you seem to think you know.” The words cut through her train of thought like a sharp blade, spreading a cold chill through her entire being as she slowly turned her head to look at him through the corner of her eye. Brock’s eyes were already affixed on her, monitoring the slightest changes to her expression. His sudden attentiveness struck a deep fear within her. Even though she knew she should be happy about the implications of his statement, she couldn’t help but feel that feeling of fear sit in her chest again, “I thought I’d lost any inkling of a chance, you know?”

It wasn’t until a beat later that she turned to look at him, adjusting the sleeping infant in her arms to not disturb her, “Chance at what?”

“A chance at being able to tell you that –“

“You know what it doesn’t matter it was in the past.” Her interruption was firm, Lilah could only hope it was firm enough for Brock to get the message to just stop. To let her breathe and process. To give her room to do what she does best and run. 

“It’s not in the past,” He answered louder than either of them had expected, huffing as he turned away and slumped in his seat, “We’ve never spoken about why you cut us all off.”

“Why would we?”

“I can’t speak for the others, but I was scared for you Lils.” His voice was so heart-shatteringly genuine to Lilah to the point where it felt as if she’d been punched straight in the gut.

“No need to be scared for me,” The words were, hopefully, encouraging as she reached over and lightly patted his arm before going back to support Tulsa.

“I can’t help it; I like you, Lilah. I know we joke about it when the others poke and prod, but I really do feel–“

“Brock please don’t do that–”

“Lilah listen to me.”

“You can’t finish that sentence.”

“Why not?”

“Because–!”

“Because? Surely you have a better answer than that.” The look of hurt didn’t escape her notice, but she found herself more focused on the growing frustration on his brow. Real this time – not the light-hearted fake expression he had been donning earlier in their conversation.

“Just– how… we’ve only been friends up until now.”

“Doesn’t mean things can’t change!” His voice was not only getting more frantic but there was a definite tone of conviction that was supported by the look on his face, “I’ve liked you since I met you. I just didn’t know how to get close to you as more than a friend. You were working for the team at the time, I didn’t want to mess that up for you. So, you became my best friend, and I wouldn’t trade that.”

Several beats passed after his confession and Lilah was finding it hard to not only process. A part of her was scolding herself at how thoughtful of her career he was being. They’d spent far too many nights talking about where she hoped to get to in the future so it only made sense that he wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardise that. The words that followed were whispered, barely carrying any sound, but his response told her that he’d heard it perfectly clearly. “It’s too fast”

“Ask anyone, ask Bo.”

“I believe you, Brock, I just,” Lilah took in a deep breath as she looked back out to the party her eyes hunting for the brother-like figure who had just been mentioned, “I’ve done this before. There’s an expectation being with someone like you and I couldn’t live up to it before, I’m sure as hell not trying again. I’m not going to lose myself again.”

“I wouldn’t ever ask you to change, I thought you knew that.” He had clearly taken some offence from the implication of her words but what hurt Brock more was how much he understood where she was coming from. He knew it wasn’t easy being with him but they were already closer than close, surely a change of their status wouldn’t have that much of an effect?

He’d also say with her when she finally felt comfortable enough to truly be herself and speak about why it wasn’t just her internship that had her reluctant to date any of the players. He remembered having held her close as he watched his, granted reserved, but strong in every sense of the word friend fight to keep her wits about her. It wasn’t until he had let her know that he was there for her that the floodgates and all details about her past were revealed to him. The pain had etched itself into Brock’s heart the more he heard her say with an accompaniment of anger at her ex, boys in general, the world. He wasn’t sure but he knew she didn’t deserve to go through what she had. No one did. 

It’s why he refused to fight her about it. Even though the feeling of rejection cut him deep, it wasn’t deep enough for her to suddenly forget the thought of vengeance in her name that had sat in the recesses of his mind since that eye-opening evening. Instead of fighting and trying to convince her to give him a chance, Brock bit his tongue. He stayed quiet beside her, not knowing where else to go that wouldn’t upset her further until she spoke up once again, directing his attention out of his head and back onto her.

“I don’t I don’t want to lose you. You mean so much to me and I love where we are, how we are.”

Neither of them spoke for a moment as they simply looked at one another. The look of hurt on Brock’s face had only deepened but she could see understanding slip into his face and she couldn’t help but smile to herself. Even in a situation where he’s not getting what he wants, he’s so willing and ready to understand. She would be lying if she said that it didn’t hurt to see him so down. With a forlorn sigh, she carefully rose from her seat and stared ahead at Bo uttering softly before she walked towards him. “Why should we put that pressure on ourselves?“

Brock had been watching her from the moment she walked away, moving to pass Tulsa back to her parents before giving them a wave. It wasn’t until Lilah had walked back into the house to presumably leave that he let himself answer her question. “Because we could be a diamond.”

A blind man could see that there was a shift in the way the two twenty-somethings interacted. The smooth, slickness of their close friendship, which everyone had gotten bored of teasing the two of them about, had gotten more strained than when Lilah had ignored them all. Maybe because it was clear that she was only making an active effort to avoid Brock which unintentionally put a strain on the whole group. Even Lilah could see that she was pulling her friends in two directions, but she couldn’t quite work through her previous experiences to just open up to the one person she knew she needed to speak to.

With the help of multiple glasses of wine deep into a girl’s night, the girls in question had torn down the walls she had put up hiding behind self-deprecating jokes and sarcasm until Lilah’s voice finally cracked as she shared her fears with her friends. They were all quick to wrap her in tight hugs and comfort her, but they weren’t leaving without helping her fix the knot she had tied herself into.

“You realise he’s hurting too, right?” Holly muttered softly, gently lifting the girl’s chin to face her as she listened to her sniffle. The older woman gently wiped the girl’s tears away, offering her a sisterly smile.

“I know and I hate myself for it.” Lilah’s words prompted very firm shakes from not only Holly but the rest of the gathered women.

“He’s never going to hold it over you. He knows how much you were hurt before, and he’d hate to put you through that again.” She confirmed as Lilah’s hand reached up to catch the newly formed tears before they streaked down her face with their friends, “But he’d never–“

“Let that happen, I know Holl.” A frustrated grunt left her mouth as she threw her hands up at no one but herself, “I’m avoiding him because I don’t want to see the sadness on his face when I can’t repeat his words to him. I don’t want to rush into anything – not this time.”

“Then let him know, don’t leave him wondering whether or not you like him at all.” The reality of what she had left Brock to assume finally hit her, a wave and dread flooding her body before resolve took its place. She was going to make things right, the only way she knew how.

Despite her throbbing head, she was up bright and early for work. Maybe brainstorming with your girls and drinking nearly a bottle of wine to yourself isn’t the best way to fuel your energy levels the night before a workday. Her hands held the tupperware tightly as she walked through the practice facility, a burn she’d procured in her tipsy state was on display on her wrist. A small price to pay she had convinced herself, but she was adamant to start making amends immediately. Anxiety was starting to build in her chest, it felt as though someone was pressing down on her heart the closer she got to the locker room, but her mind was set, and she was going to do it.

When her fist gently knocked on the locker room door, knowing only a few of the team would have actually arrived so early before practice but she knew Brock was one of them (Bo as well in case she needed the moral support). A yell followed her knock, but she only responded with another knock until the door was pulled open to reveal big brother himself who immediately cheered at the sight of her. Fortunately, all the boys were dressed, or at least covered up, as they welcomed her inside. Lilah’s greeting was brief, and she momentarily forgot why she even made the journey until Conor asked about what she was holding.

“Oh yeah – Brock these are for you, I know you like them.” Her voice was as soft as it had been when she first met the boys which they all found weird but understood considering the tension everyone had felt around the two recently. She carefully handed over the container which Brock took apprehensively but accepted with a nod, nonetheless. Watching as he pulled the lid off to reveal protein brownie, a smile that she hadn’t seen on his face (at least around her) made residence on his lips as he looked up at her. After the first time she had made the brownies for the boys, Brock had been begging her to make him a batch, but she always brushed the request off, claiming she was too busy, “I finally had some time to make you some more.”

Giving him a quick smile and a shrug, she turned on her heels and walked straight out of the locker room. Pausing as soon as she was out of their sights to just breathe in deep and fill her lungs properly feeling a little lost for breath but proud of herself for the courage that she had displayed. It was small but she knew it was just the start of her apologies. As she set off down the hallway again with a slight skip in her step, a hand slipped around her bicep gently turning her back around to face the way she had just come.

“Thank you,” Was the first thing she heard as her eyes settled on Brock who had let go of her arm and taken a step back. A weak smile was still perched on his lips as he spoke, clearly trying to lighten the mood, “The boys are a little envious, especially Bo.”

“I think he’s just used to getting the baked goods for himself.” Lilah joked with a nervous smile, watching his face before choosing to bite the bullet and just say what she’s been wanting to say, “Listen, Boes – I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt your feelings.”

“Then why did you just walk away? And then avoid me?”

“I told you; I didn’t want to lose you.” It was the honest truth, they both knew it but she also knew it wasn’t the full story. With his kindness and thoughtfulness and willingness to understand, he deserved to know everything, “Being around you makes me both the happiest person in the world and also the most nervous.”

Brock almost couldn’t believe the words he was hearing as his brows furrowed in response, “I make you nervous? Is this still because of the expectations? Of being with a professional athlete?”

“No Brock, I’ve seen you in a clay face mask, I’m not nervous because of who you are!” They both laughed at the memory she had mentioned, it being the same night he gained his new nickname from her, “You make me nervous because my tummy starts to turn, and my heart beats out of control when I’m around you.”

“I’m not going to ask you to do anything that makes you feel unhappy or unsettled. I’m happy where we are too so long as you let me stay here” He couldn’t help but worry that he might have pushed too far and what that meant for their future as friends. His fingers tried to get rid of the anxious energy by softly nudging Lilah’s fingers with her own until he felt a light squeeze from her.

“I didn’t stop you from speaking because I didn’t reciprocate but because I panicked.”

“So, you do care about me the same way?” 

The pure confusion on his face was endearing and all Lilah could do in response was further reduce the gap between them. She reached over and gently took his hand in her own, first grasping onto his fingers and allowing him the opportunity to pull away. When she felt the pressure of his finger bending slightly to hold onto her own, she slipped her hand further in his until their palms sat firmly against one another, “I like how we are, I wasn’t lying. But I can’t deny that my heart skips a beat whenever I’m with you, but we’d be foolish to rush into this and ruin everything that we have. Brock you are my Prince Charming–“

“But he’s–“

“I know he’s the bad guy don’t ruin the moment.” He let out a short laugh, copying her previous actions and stepping closer to her and quickly making work of holding her other hand, “ But I need us to take this slow, can we do that?”

“Of course we can.” The words were whispered as if an entire weight had just fallen off his back. Pulling her across the minimal space between them, his arms wrapped her in the tightest hug he could manage without hurting her and placed a kiss on the crown of her head, “ Whatever you need, you’re what I’ve been looking for.”

[cellythefloshie]

;; Last Christmas Dedicated to @antoineroussel  for her winter fic exchange 2k23

Summary: Act 1. Home for the holidays, Charlotte isn’t looking forward to her parent’s annual Christmas party. That is until it provides the opportunity to reconnect with her childhood friend, and AHL player, Adam Lowry.  Act. 2. Charlotte avoid going home for the holidays to avoid the reminder of last Christmas and the heartache that followed only to cross paths with Adam who is now in his Rookie season with the Winnipeg Jets. Charlotte and Adam are forced to face the reality that their friendship may be something that needs to be left in the past.  Kinks & TW: Angst, holiday themed, original character, situation ship, friends-to-lovers, drinking/alcohol, heart break, size kink, teasing/banter, riding, breast play (mild), missionary, protected sex, (i probably missed something here so please be sure to yell at me if I did) ABOUT THE OC: Face Claim: Crystal Reed. Name: Charlotte aka “Charlie” aka “Mini”. Charlotte and Adam are written as childhood best friends. Act 1: Charlie is a University student and Adam is playing with the St. John’s IceCaps who were the WPG Jet’s AHL Affiliate from 2011-2015. Act 2: Adam is playing in the NHL with the WPG Jets.  Word Count: 10011 A/N: Thank you so much for reaching out and inviting me to participate in the exchange! It was an absolute pleasure to be able to write this for you! It was so much fun being able to write an OC again after writing reader inserts since April, and I got to indulge in writing both Adam and Angst. It got me right in the soul. I WAS going to fade to black with this piece (almost 5k words ago), but I have 0 self control... AND I hope you don’t mind that it’s holiday themed because I’ve had this plotted since we first talked about it, but I didn’t get it written until much later than I expected...

Listen to their playlist while you read. Last Christmas now has a sequel series! Read more of Adam and Charlotte in Just Me & You. 

​Act 1. 

“-Charlotte, honey!” 

It was the sickeningly sweet voice of her mother that greeted Charlie as she had done her best to sneak in through the back door. She had obviously failed. She should have known better, really, there was no way that she was going to be able to get away with going unseen when her parents were entertaining their family and close friends for the annual Christmas Party - not when her mother was always keen on showing her off. 

But Charlie had made other plans for the evening. She had intended to avoid the gaudy decore and the seasonal music that was too loud for Charlie to study comfortably. While her mother had tried to encourage her to put the books down, if only for a night, Charlie had managed to sneak out to a local coffee shop under the pretense of studying for the exams that would rapidly approach once she got back to school after the break - and so she hid at that small coffee shop down the road until the hours grew late and the open sign was flipped to closed. 

Warm eyes shut as Charlie turned in place, her head leaning against the door as she shut it to hide the sigh from her mother that hovered at the kitchen island with a glass of wine, and her friends as they gossips. She had hoped that it would have quieted down before she got home. Yet, the party raged on as if it were a frat party back on campus. Forcing a smile, she turned to face her mother and her guests, as her hand raised to draw her bright red scarf from around her neck. Dark hair dusted with freshly fallen snow fell in loose curls down her back as it was freed from where it was tangled in the warmth of her outerwear that was cast aside on a near stool. 

“Hi mom,” her smile was so forced it almost hurt as she looked at each of her mother’s friends awkwardly, “you ladies look like you’re having fun. I would really hate to ruin it-” She spoke causally as she reached for a festive paper plate, her fingers then finding the assortment of finger food that sat out on the counter, “I’m just going to head upstairs-”

Charlie was drowned out by an assortment of coos. All gawking about how grown up she had become in the few short years she had spent away at college focused on her studies, and how she wasn’t the little girl they all so fondly remembered. It left her grumbling as she pushed her way from the kitchen, keeping her head down as she moved for the stairs. Just a few more strides and she would be free, but her mom had other plans as her familiar touch came down on her shoulders to keep her daughter from wandering too far. 

“Ah, Ah, Charlotte,” she tutted her and suddenly Charlotte felt like a child again, “I think there is someone you’re going to be excited to see.”

Charlie had to bite her tongue to hold back a scoff, but there was no hiding how her large doe-eyes rolled as she thought to herself: Oh yeah, I bet there is. And so she followed her mother’s guidance, her expression no short of annoyed as she was forced to walk through crowds of her parent’s friends and over to her father who was entertaining his friends with one of his wild work stories - a story Charlie had already heard many times before, and she was sure everyone else had as well. 

Her eyes scanned the crowd, looking for the familiar face that was meant to excite her beyond the desire to hide back in her room. It was there, seated in her father’s favourite armchair, his face half hidden behind a glass of amber liquor she spotted him. Full lips split, bearing a far-from-fake grin as she reached down to abandon her plate on the near coffee table. After that, there was no stopping her. Adam’s bright eyes that had contrasted her so effortlessly had found her face and he was standing up from the seat to meet her halfway. 

“Dad’s just letting you sit in his chair now, huh, hot shot?” Charlie greeted him playfully, her arms winding around his middle with ease without a thought and it was only as his arms wrapped around her that she realized just how much he had changed since he had left Calgary. Charlie could feel every muscle beneath his white t-shirt and he had easily grown another inch or two since his draft day three years ago. Her fingers moved cautiously over the expanse of his back as she pulled back just enough to look up at him as he returned the stare down at her. 

“Your dad and I, we did make that bet,” Adam half smirked, earning a shake of her head as she left out a laugh. It had been the best seat in the house, leather and perfectly worn in and it reclined. It was one that Adam had sought after for years as a child, so as it had approached his draft, Adam had bet that if he had gone in the top 100 players, whenever he had come back to visit he would get to sit in the chair. Adam had been drafted 67th overall that year, but he had never returned to her childhood home, until now. 

“I didn’t think he’d hold to it,” Charlie countered, casting a glance toward her father before looking back up at Adam, “what are you doing here, anyway? I haven’t seen you since Minnesota.”

“Surprised Mom and Dad for the holidays,” Adam smiled, his hands continuing to linger on the curves of her waist - his thumbs stroking over it slowly and she watched as there was a flicker of confusion in his eyes. He didn’t remember her body feeling like that - hell, they were practically still kids when he had been drafted to the WHL and had only seen each other briefly during his draft in Minnesota. While their history would always remain, they were far from the kids they once were, not they were practically strangers now. “And they would never cancel on your mom, so I wasn’t about to pass up on seeing my best friend.” 

His words made her skin tingle. Did he have the right to call her that still? After so many years of nothing more than sparse text messages and the occasional goofy Snapchat picture? Their different lives had divided them, but maybe now was their chance to really reconnect. 

“You’ve been here all night?” Charlie quirked a brow, taking a step back when she noticed her father cock his head to the side as he had begun to raise a brow of his own. 

She and Adam had always been close - their mother’s bathed them together, and she called her mom Auntie until she was 10 and knew better kind of close - but Charlie wasn’t a little girl any longer and her father knew that - her father also knew that Adam wasn’t the little boy that used to follow her around like a lost puppy anymore. He was a grown man now-

“Since your mom started making dinner,” Adam sighed, his hand reaching up to card through his shaggy brown hair as he cast a glance out the window and to the snow that fell outside, “they sure know how to throw a hell of a party.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing compared to the trouble you get into now,” Charlie teased, taking careful strides, and Adam fell in step behind as she moved to the makeshift bar. 

“Me, get into trouble? Never,” Adam was beaming as he leaned back against the wall. 

Charlie shook her head slowly as she mixed herself a drink, her pour a little heavy on the alcohol - but she had to make up for the lost time. Adam was surely multiple drinks deep after spending the evening with her parents, though he hid it well or had developed a very strong tolerance since they had last broken into her father’s liquor cabinet at fourteen. 

“That’s only because you’re always able to talk your way out of it,” Charlie reminded, taking the first slow sip of her drink that burned its way down her throat, “or have you been hit so many times that you’ve lost your silver tongue?”

“Nah, I still got it,” Adam assured. 

“Good, because I don’t think I can handle listening to All I Want For Christmas is You again,” Charlie half groaned, her hand reaching out to take one of Adam’s carefully. 

She didn’t dare look back as she lead him through the living room and to the stairs that would take them up to the second story, and up to her bedroom. Adam didn’t stop her, his steps careful and quiet as he followed up behind her, his voice dropping to a low whisper as he whispered to her, “you really want your father to kill me, huh?”

She could feel his hot breath on her neck as he spoke, and it felt like his laugh was sending vibrations right through her body as they came to her bedroom door. It was just as she had left it when she had moved to campus at seventeen. From her small collection of stuffed animals sitting in her favorite reading chair to the pictures that framed her vanity mirror, her parents hadn’t moved a single thing out of place. Charlie stood awkwardly in the middle of the room, her hand gripping the flimsy plastic cup almost desperately. This wasn’t the first time she had Adam in her room, but they had been just kids back then - the click of the door closing had her stomach jumping into her throat - and they had always had a strict open-door policy thanks to her dad. 

“Oh, you’re really wanting dad to kill you now,” Charlie teased him as she turned in place, finding his smile and following his eyes to the pictures on her vanity. They were an assortment of photos from when she was young, and many were with him. There were pictures of when they were babies, to the days they spent at summer camp together, and their most recent photo was framed and sat at the very corner of her vanity. It had been the morning of his draft, their families had gotten breakfast together and he was in the ill-fitted suit of his - prepared for the off chance that he may have been drafted in the first round. 

Adam didn’t reply to Charlie’s banter, and instead shot a smile back at her, his tone soft as he spoke to her, “lots of good memories here.”

“Yeah,” she agreed gently, stepping forward to join him at his side, “we used to do everything together-”

“Do you ever miss it?”

“Miss being kids or us?”

Us. The word left an odd taste in Charlie’s mouth, one that she tried to wash out with the strong alcohol in her drink. They had never really been an Us, had they? Sure, they had been inseparable for most of their childhood, Charlie & Adam, but that was their friendship. He had dated girls she had never approved of, and she dated guys Adam would inevitably scare off. Hell, they hadn’t don’t anything to suggest that there was a chance that they would have ever shared anything more than the friendship they had forged. She hadn’t wanted to kiss him… not until now as he stood so close to her in her room, wearing that smile she had almost forgotten and very much a man now. 

“I could always count on you being there back then,” Adam sighed and Charlie's mouth went dry, “every tournament, every game. Hell, we almost had your mom convinced to move you out to Swift Current, you remember?”

“How could I forget?” She shook her head as she remembered the nonsense she had tried to feed her mother and the dramatic lengths the pair had gone to before it was made clear that it was far from a reality for them. “Still convinced them to drive me out to see you almost every weekend - but they got you all the way across the country now, don’t they hot shot?”

Reaching her hand out, Charlie shoved against Adam’s arm, a playful habit that returned all too quickly as did the comfort of being around him. 

“Oh, you’re already going to start back up with that shit, huh, Mini?” Adam laughed, a large hand reaching out to abandon his glass on the vanity. 

Hearing her old nickname slip from his lips so effortlessly left her mouth dry. No one called her that anymore - not since she hit her growth spurt - but Adam, he would forever tower taller than her. Charlie licked her lips slowly before taking another long sip of her drink before she set it down beside Adam’s. Her hands then found his chest, so strong beneath her touch, in a playful shove. One that Adam met with his own, earning a laugh from Charlie as she took one stumbled step back. It wasn’t enough to send her into a retreat. Instead, she had leaned in for another playful shove, but she wasn’t met by Adam’s playful roughhousing. No, Adam wrapped his hands around her waist and lifted her up with ease. 

When they were kids, she would have left out a laugh, or a groan of protest, but not, Charlie was reduced to silence. Her bedroom went blurry around her, and she could only see Adam and the grin on his face as he took careful strides toward her bed. She could feel each flex of his muscles as he held her so effortlessly, and there was no ignoring how naturally her legs had wrapped around his hips - and how his belt buckle grazed roughly over her jeans. The strength of his arms remained as they reached the bed, as  Adam didn’t release her to free fall down onto the mattress, instead, he was falling with her but she was left breathless all the same. 

Charlie did her best to hide the heave of her chest as she lay out on the bed, her dark hair fanned out beneath her and her sweater left wrinkled and bunched up her waist bearing just enough skin on her stomach to draw in Adam’s curious touch. She could feel his thumb drag over her exposed skin, his touch hesitant as if he shouldn’t be touching her there at all. Together they lay out on the bed in silence, Adam’s body hovering slightly over her own. Charlie could feel the heat of his body against her own and taste his breath with each inhale. It was an intoxicating combination. One that left her reaching down to her mattress and gripping at the covers in restraint. 

“Adam,” his name escaped her lips in a quivering breath, her warm eyes dragging over the softened features of his face. His jaw had slacked, and his thin lips parted as they were consumed by each of his steady breaths. Her gaze dragged over the angles of his jaw and up and over his cheekbones that had only seemed to sharpen as his youth left him. And his eyes were piercing as Charlie found them. His brazen stare was only obstructed by the shagged strands of his hair that hung down over his forehead and the intensity that consumed the blue of his eyes was unlike she had ever seen in him before - or maybe she just hadn’t been looking. 

Their gaze was locked, but it didn’t distract her from how his hand had left the skin of her stomach and dragged upward. Up and over the swell of her breast - that threatened to heave at just the slightest graze of his fingers tips. Those same fingertips danced over her collarbone - her neck stretching out almost instinctively, a heavy breath consuming Charlie as if to prepare for his fist to wrap around her throat - but his touch persisted. His touch didn’t stop until it had stroked over the angle of her jaw, and his thumb had found her quivering lower lip. 

“I’ve missed you, Charlie,” Adam sounded, his words a low groan as his thumb stroked her lip, leaving it almost numb, “fuck, you’re so…” Charlie watched as he licked his lips, trying to find the right word to say - and she didn’t care what he had to say. Not really - how could she when all she could think about was what his tongue would taste in her mouth? “...Beautiful.”

The word stung, just like the slap sixteen-year-old Charlie would have given him if she had even thought he was thinking something like that. But now, Charlie was very much consumed by his touch and his words held left her melting. 

“Adam, you shut your mouth before you say something stupid…” Charlie cautioned him slowly, his own voice weak as her lips dragged over the pad of his thumb. The graze left her shutter, her eyes shutting as she tried to force herself to ignore just how good it felt to feel his flesh in places he had never explored before. 

“Stupid? No,” Adam answered, and Charlie felt the bed shift oh so slightly. He was leaning in, his hot breath washing over her face now as his thumb tugged at the lower lobe of her lip, “I should have been telling you that a long time ago-”

Charlie scoffed, her eyes remaining closed as she parted her lips to speak again - too nervous to open them and see just how close to her he had become. If she had seen him so close, she wouldn’t be able to control herself. “Adam, how many drinks have you had?”

“You think I’m drunk?” his voice was laced with a laugh, one that left her own lips curling up into a grin. 

“Can you blame me?” It was only then that Charlie let her eyes blink open and she took in the sight of him. 

Adam was a mere breath away from her lips, his hair tickling her forehead as his eyes fell into slow, dreamy blinks. “Charlotte,” she hated when people called her by her full name, but in the moment, he had made it feel so intimate, “I really want to kiss you.”

“What’s stopping you?” Charlie muttered, her lungs holding onto her breath as if he was going to steal it from her. 

“I’m only slightly worried that you may hit me if I tried,” his smile grew, and her own came to mirror his. 

“I’m not going to hit you, Ad-”

Before she could finish, he had stolen the last bit of air between them, his thumb leaving her lips to clear the way for his own lips.  His mouth met hers gently, cautiously, as if she may change her mind at any moment and raise a hand up to give him a good smack. Once upon a time, she would have. She would have pulled back with a gasp and her palm would have met his cheek with a sting because he was her best friend and she wasn’t going to risk that at sixteen. But now, her head was spinning, her body consumed by the mix of emotions that came with seeing him for the first time in three years. Excitement met longing and mixed with melancholy and it left her head spinning as his lips moved effortlessly against her own. Each motion drew her mouth open, adding depth and hunger to the first kiss they had shared. 

She reveled in the taste of sweet bourbon from his tongue as it met her own in a slow graze and it had brought such comfort that her hands eased from their rigid grasp on the covers. Her touch found the expanse of his back, her fingers wrinkling the thin-white fabric of his t-shirt as she left herself to feel his strength. It drew him in closer, Adam shifting in the slightest to hover fully over her form - never once breaking their kiss - and she could feel all of him. Her head was spinning, her thoughts gone as she was consumed by Adam and only Adam. 

Charlie was left groaning against his lips, her hands clutching him desperately, and her knees resting on each side of his hips as she lost all composure. She was pushing up from the bed, Adam giving her just enough room to seek out the hem of her knit sweater and he helped her draw it from her frame. It was then their lips were pulled from one another, both of them left gasping and eyes opening to meet in a desirous gaze. Adam stared at her, and Charlie stared back the only sound shared between them, desperate, panting gasps. If they continued, there would be no going back to how things were before, and they both knew it. But it didn’t stop them. 

Adam’s hands dropped her cable-knit sweater down on the bed, his eyes never once leaving hers before he reached back and took hold of the thin fabric of his t-shirt. He pulled it off in one swift movement, bearing the muscles of his toned chest and strong abs to her as he knelt between her thighs. 

Charlie let out an uneven sigh. She had seen him shirtless before, probably more times than she could count, but he had never looked like that. “Jesus, Adam,” she couldn’t contain herself, her hand reaching out to stroke down his chest without a single thought to how he was seeing her breasts in something other than a restrictive sports bra for the first time since puberty had finally decided to be kind. “What are they feeding you out there?”

Adam let out a low throaty chuckle as he arched over, placing his hand palm down on the mattress trapping Charlie beneath him against the bed. She watched as muscle she didn’t even know could exist flexed in his shoulder. Licking her lips, Charlie was near salivating at the sight of him as she pushed up onto her elbows to close the short distance between them and prevent Adam from having too much time to admire her soft, feminine body. His athleticism had never intimidated her until now. It was not his talent or his status, but his body that made her so instantaneously insecure. And she was sure he could feel it in the desperation of her kiss against his mouth and the angles of his jawline. 

Charlie could feel the vibrations of his groan against his own lips as Adam lowered himself down against her. He wasn’t heavy against her, but Charlie marveled at just how much of him she could feel. His chest was warm against the exposed skin of her breast, his friction sending the cups of her bra chaffing and making her nipples hard. Then there were his hips, which pressed down into her. It sent the cold metal of his belt buckle dragging over her skin and the pressure, paired with the strength of his thick, muscular thighs had her spreading her legs for him further. 

Her heels dug down into the plush mattress, her hips raising with the hope of grinding up against him only to meet the flesh of his abs. Charlie groaned against his lips, almost frustrated. Why did Adam have to be so damn tall? Usually, Adam towering almost an entire foot taller than her was an asset, but not when she was trying to be sexy. 

Leaning her head back she let it lull to the side, Adam’s hot lips dragging over the soft skin of her neck, and she used that leverage to reach her hand down between their bodies and didn’t stop until her careful touch grazed over the growing bulge of his cock as it tested the restraint of his jeans. Fingers traced up and down the thick outline, earning a low, quivering breath from parted lips. A breath that was laced with a subtle holy fuck that she did her best to play off as a moan. Adam was huge, in every way she could possibly imagine. From his height to his cock - Charlie swallowed hard - she was all the more intimate to take him now. 

“First time?” Adam muttered out against her skin, his tone only half teasing. 

“Oh, you would like that, wouldn’t you?” Charlie gawked up at him, her eyes going as large as a doe in the headlights as she mocked him, “Oh Adam, I’ve been waiting so long for you to take me with your giant cock. I’ve wanted you and only you for so long,” she let out two desperate heaves before she was muffling her laughter into the strength of his bicep. 

“Fuck off,” Adam laughed, his hands taking each side of her hips firmly before flipping over in the bed. He guided him on top of him effortlessly, her knees falling on each side of his hips so that she could feel him against her cunt the only thing between them was the thin layers of their clothes. 

Perched up on top of him, her cheeks flushed with color, her hands coming to brace against his chest as she began to roll her hips slowly. The friction left her biting her lip, her arousal already beginning to pool between her legs as she could feel his cock growing harder - and it even left Adam groaning with impatience. 

He was propped up against her pillow, his bright eyes fluttering as he reached a single hand out to stroke over her warm cheek. He stroked the heated flesh, his fingers reaching out to hold her dark tendrils away from her soft features as he spoke to her. “I may not be your first, Charlie,” his tone was low, sultry and it left her mouth dry and panties wet, “but have you taken a cock this big?”

She let her hips roll slowly dragging her cunt from what felt like his balls to tip, and she shuttered as her head shook slowly from side to side. And she watched as his smile grew, the touch of his thumb stroking against her cheek a little more tender now. 

“We can go slow,” he assured, his hips raising as his hand dropped. 

She couldn’t hold back the soft whimper that took her as the pressure of his cock tested the friction of her jeans as he sunk his hand into his pocket. He fished out his wallet, drawing out the fine leather before pulling out the foil that had been tucked away among a wad of cash in various, colorful, dollar amounts. 

“That’s not the same one that you stole from your dad’s bedside table in high school, is it?” She teased him gently, her smile splaying over her lips as she crawled off of him and to the bed at his side. 

“No, no,” Adam laughed before he put the foil in his mouth and held it there as she reached down to take care of his jeans and belt. It was as he pushed them down he muttered, “that one didn’t fit.”

“Oh fuck off, they stretch,” Charlie scoffed, her handing beginning to work on her own pants. 

Spitting the condom out on the bed, Adam smirked and pressed up onto his knees. “Okay, okay, correction,” he raised his hands up as if in surrender, “it didn’t fit comfortably.”

“That’s what I thought,” she chided as she pushed her pants down to her knees, only for Adam’s own hands to meet the fabric and pull them down the rest of the way. 

Charlie could feel every lazy drag of his fingers against her skin, his touch like the strike of a match leaving a blazing trail on her skin in its wake. It should have left her pulling away, but it only made Charlie want more. His touch silenced her teasing, his fingers dragging back up the smooth skin of her legs as she was rid of her jeans and was left in nothing but her underwear. If it had been anyone else Charlie would have been flooded with confidence, but with Adam, it might as well have been her first time. He knew her better than anyone, every story, every scar, every secret. But it was only being near-naked in front of him that she felt truly vulnerable.

His hands kept gliding up. Up over the ticklish curves of her knees. Up over imperfect, tiger-striped thighs. And to the thin, flimsy fabric of her panties that left an imprint of the seams against her hips. Adam looks up at her through his shaggy hair as two thick fingers hooked her panties around her hips - and she couldn’t breathe. Not while he was looking at her like that, silently asking her permission to keep going with the most curious and caring of glances. Her lips parted, but she found no words. Charlie could only nod. 

Adam bit down on his lip as he eased her panties away from her lips. Charlie watched as his jaw went slack, his gaze dropping to the sweet heat between her legs as it was exposed to him. “Oh, Charlie,” Adam let out a satisfied hum at the sight of how her arousal, and how it had soaked into her panties, “you’re so wet.” His words were almost as if he were in awe, but then his smile grew and his tone became teasing, “Did I do that?”

His teasing cut right through her nerves and brought a smile to her lips that lit up her features and brought her the confidence she so desperately needed. 

“You might have had something to do with it,” her head cocked to the side sending her dark curtain of curls over her shoulders and over her breasts as she reached back to free the, from the confines of her bra. 

Adam’s eyes went as wide at the sight of her soft, womanly body fully exposed to him. His smile didn’t fade, no, it grew wider as his teeth took hold of his lower lip almost shyly. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Charlie muttered. Her words were a mere whisper as her arms crossed over her chest awkwardly in an attempt to cover her exposed breasts. 

Adam almost stuttered on his words, his cheeks flushing as he reached a hand out to gesture to her body, “you look, incredible Charlie. Absolutely, just, wow-”

“You're just saying that-”

“No, really,” Adam sighed, his hand reaching down and pushing down his boxers and abandoning them at the foot of the bed. She crawled up her childhood bed until he was seated against the pillow - his stiff cock laying out over the tone plains of his stomach threatening to draw all of her attention. It was there, propped up in the comfort of her bed, that he ripped open the foil and worked the thin latex over his cock with the strength of his well-worked hands. “Come ‘ere, Charlie.”

Silently, she obliged and crawled up the length of the bed and into his lap. Each of her knees found its place at each of his hips and her sweet, dripping cunt came to rest over his cock. Her stomach fluttered with the nerves of anticipation, her hips rolling oh so slightly so that she could feel the thick vein of his cock stroke against her clit. The pleasure burned through her body and coaxed a soft sound from Adam’s lips. One that lingered in his words as he spoke to her, “you’re fucking perfect.”

His hand reached out, stroking her dark hair back from her face, and back so that it cascaded down the length of her back. His hands then dragged down, Stroking at her eager neck and the angles of her shoulder and stopping at the impressive swells of her breast. Adam palmed at her supple flesh with his coarse hands, her chest consumed by desperate, heaving breaths at his touch - and he muttered out his sweet words, “so perfect…” Then, Adam was leaning in, his hair hanging down into his eyes as his mouth descended down. He placed slow, open-mouthed kisses over each breast. Kisses that warmed them with the heat of his mouth and were instantly cooled by the room’s tepid air. 

“Adam,” Charlie gasped out, her fingers finding his hair gripping just enough to ground herself but not enough to stop his movements as he sucked on one nipple, and the next, before his tongue dragged up from the valley between them to the sweet angles of her jaw. 

Adam raised a brow at her as he placed peppered kisses along her jaw, trialing his way to the corner of her mouth as he let out an inquisitive hum, “do you think you’re ready for me, Charlie?”

Nodding desperately, Charlie pressed up on her knees and gave Adam the room he needed to reach between them. She could feel his hot hand against the inside of her thigh as he took hold of his own cock, stroking it slowly as he drew it up to guide the very tip to her core - but it wasn’t without teasing her first. He dragged the tip of his cock up and down the fold of her cunt slowly, sending her arousal dripping down the latex and over his hand before he positioned himself at her core. 

“You don’t have to take it all,” he assured her gently, “it can be… a lot. So go slow, and we can stop if you need to. Okay, Charlie?”

“Yeah,” she sighed, her hand reaching out to brace herself against the strength of his shoulders, “yeah, okay.” She took two long blinks, trying to ease the spinning in her mind at the feeling of his cock between her legs. It all seemed like a dream, like the ones she would have as a teenager and would do all in her willpower to repress - because you weren’t supposed to think about your best friend like that. But it was the burning pleasure of slowly taking his cock into her eager cunt that reminded her that this was very much of a reality. 

Charlie took him slowly, inch by inch he spread her walls, and it left her cursing out under her breath in pleasure. “You’re taking me so well, Charlie,” came Adam’s encouraging coo, his hands having abandoned his own cock and found her hips to help carefully guide her as she rode his cock. With each rise and fall of her cunt around his cock, her head spun and she questioned just how much more of him there could possibly be. 

“Jesus Christ, Adam,” she near yelped, her head thrown back before she could bite down on her lip and stop herself. 

Adam hushed her gently, a single hand raising to stroke over her cheek. Charlie leaned into his touch as she panted, her lips parting and taking his thumb in her mouth without a thought in her head. She sucked on it slowly, earning a soft moan from Adam’s lips and it muffled her own as she eased down on him further and found the relief of his balls smacking against her ass. She had managed to take all of him. Smiling around his thumb, Charlie cast a glance down at Adam who was watching her with a dreamy gaze. 

“We’re going to have to find a way to keep you quiet, Charlie,” he beamed up at her and dragged his thumb from her lips and over her smooth cheek slowly. He cupped her face in her hand, his fingers knotted in her hair. “Because if your dad wasn’t going to kill me before, he sure as hell would want to kill me now-” 

“Don’t talk about my dad when you’re balls deep in my cunt, please,” Charlie begged, her skin ablaze and shimmering as she began to sweat. 

“Sorry, mood killer?”

“Just a bit,” Charlie gasped out as the tip of his cock pressed into her limits. She was so impossibly full of him, and it near had her legs trembling. 

“I’ll make it up to you,” Adam spoke, his words almost charming as his hand gripped at her hip firmly, “just don’t make a sound.” 

His smile was wicked as he held her gaze and drew her in close to his body. With their bodies chest to chest, his cock buried to its absolute limit and her face tucked into his neck to muffle any sound that would threaten to spill from Charlie’s lips, Adam flipped them.

The plush mattress was welcome on Charlie’s back as she let out a soft yelp against the flesh of Adam’s throat. “Sorry,” she muttered softly, her smile blossoming and her lips dragging over his neck with every word, “I can’t help it - you feel so good.” 

Adam propped himself up with his elbows on each side of her head, his lips coming down to kiss her forehead with a slow lingering kiss - as he couldn’t quite reach her lips while he remained deep inside her cunt. His hot breath washed over her face with every exhale as he began to roll his hips, drawing his cock from her just enough to slide back inside her in a steady rhythm. Each thrust sent a burning pleasure through to her core, and a soft sound from parted lips. It was a moan that only threatened to grow louder as the pleasure grew. And when Charlie wound her short legs around Adam’s hips, she muffled her cries of pleasure in the strength of his shoulder and clung to him like he was her only source of gravity. 

Her eyes watered as she held onto him so desperately, her teeth grazing over his skin and the taste of him lingered on her tongue as she muffled her moans into his shoulder - and when he reached a hand back to grip at her thick thigh, holding it in place as he hit such a depth that sent his own eyes fluttering back with pleasure, her head lulled to the side and she forced to burry he gave into the flex of his bicep.

“Adam,” his name was a hymn on her tongue, her body shuddering as her climax threatened to overtake her - as he could feel its threat as her cunt began to pulse around him. 

His hand only left her leg to take hold of her chin, guiding her soft features took look up at his as they too melted with pleasure. His thumb stroked over her lips slowly, tugging at her lower lobe and drawing her sweet lips open to welcome his mouth. Charlie was consumed by Adam’s kiss - one that was unlike the one that had started it all. There was no caution, no that had all been abandoned now. His kiss was one with purpose. One that stole her desperate breath from her breast and flooded her with emotion. It struck her like a slap to the face, leaving her gasping against his lips and her head spinning. 

Not once had she ever been kissed the way Adam had kissed her, and it left her trembling as her core clenched around him. The grip of her was enough to draw him to his release. He lost all control, every thought of gentle caution seemingly lost as Adam pounded into her with a series of forceful thrusts. Then, with his cock buried deep inside her and sweat dripping down the angles of his face and body, Adam stilled. 

Faces mere inches apart, only panting could be heard. Eyes brown and blue were caught between open and fluttering shut as their bodies only began to calm. While Charlie crazed to continue to be close to Adam, the wrap of her legs around his waist loosened, her feet sliding down to the bed with a quiet thud. And she reached up both hands slowly to stroke his sweat-drenched strands from his face. Charlie watched as his eyes fluttered and his lips parted as he let out every heavy exhale that was laced with the whisper of her name on his tongue. And she relished in it, her own name echoing in her euphoria dazed mine until Adam’s words drew her back into reality. 

“What time is it?” his words were a soft whisper as he remained hovering over her and his cock still buried deep in her cunt. 

Charlie’s head lulled to the side, taking in the glow of her old digital clock. “Late,” she answered him simply, “people would have started to go home already… Your parents, were they staying the night in the guest room?” Her words were slow, hesitant even as she silently recollected the many times he had spent the night in her room when they were children. When they were too young for their parents to care, they had shared the bed, or even a tent out in the backyard in the summertime - but as they had grown older, her father more concerned about a teenager's urges, Adam had slept on the floor beside her bed. She remembered waking up with her hand reaching down over the edge of the bed to his hand even more fondly now. 

“No,” Adam hung his head, “we were going to cab home, my flight leaves early in the morning.”

Her heart fell, and her stomach twisted into knots. Of course, he would have to leave. They would need him back before their next game, and they kept a tight schedule - she was lucky to have gotten to see him at all. There was no easing how sick knowing she was going to have to say goodbye to him before the night was through made her. Not even the thrill of seeing him again, nor the euphoria of her climax could put it at ease. 

Charlie forced a smile, trying so desperately to hide the dread that consumed her. “We should probably get dressed before someone comes looking for you.”

“Your dad would really kill me then, huh?” Adam half laughed as he pushed up with whatever strength he had left as eased his cock from her core. 

She near whined as she was left void of him, her legs coming together firmly as she shifted to the edge of her bed. She bit down on her lip as she fought to find her composure, and when she spoke her tone with low but she carried her smile into her voice, “Your teammates would really miss you if you died over something so menial-”

“Ouch,” Adam hissed, his hand coming up to rest over his heart as if he had been stabbed through it, “menial? That’s how bad it was?”

“Adam I-” Charlie found herself stumbling over her words as she pulled a loose t-shirt down over her naked body - the Swift Current Broncos logo resting right over her chest, “you know that’s not what I meant…”

“I know,” Adam grinned his tone teasing as he discarded the used condom into the waste basket by her bed and moved to step into his boxers, “I’m just teasing you Charlie - and like, I mean,” he rambled as he tried to choose his words carefully, “you enjoyed yourself?”

“Well,” Charlie’s tone was teasing as she found his t-shirt, took it in her hand, and held it out to Adam casually, “you were right about being the biggest-”

“Oh, you’re just cruel, Charlie!” Adam laughed out so loud that she was sure that someone would have heard it downstairs. He continued to laugh as he stepped forward, his one hand pushing his shirt away while the other reached out for her. Soon, Adam had her in his arms again and hoisted her up so that he was holding her near and her legs could wrap around his middle. “Lie to me at least,” he playfully begged her as his hands kneaded at the soft flesh of her thighs, “tell me it’s all you’ve ever dreamed.”

Charlie shook her head slowly, her forehead coming down to rest against his carefully as she deadpanned, “worst I’ve ever had.” And then she snickered, her lips curling up into a smile to match Adams. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever been more relieved that you’re the worst liar I know,” Adam sighed in relief, “because I don’t think I have the time to prove to you just how good I can be…”

“Another time, hot shot,” Charlie hummed, leaning back just enough to peer around him and to the door when she heard footsteps pass in the hall, “I think we’ve pushed our luck long enough.”

Adam lowered her to the ground before his hands abandoned her body for the soft fabric of his t-shirt - but the ghost of his touch remained on his skin and between her legs even. It was a feeling that Charlie was sure would be difficult to forget - even if it all came to feel like nothing more like a dream in the morning. 

The pair dressed in silence, nothing shared between them except lingering glances and soft smiles as more and more skin was covered. It was only in that silence that Charlie could hear that the Christmas carols that had consumed the home had gone quiet and there was nothing more to be heard from downstairs than their father’s laughter.

“You should go down first,” Charlie decided as she reached for her robe and leaned back against the pale floral wallpaper that decorated her wall, “dad will ask too many questions if I come down already changed into my pajamas…” 

“Yeah, right, good idea,” Adam stuttered, his hand carding through his own hair, “so I guess, this is where I should give you a proper goodbye, huh? Because I don’t think you’re dad would like me kissing you at the front door…”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Charlie nodded slowly and swallowed hard - though, she would be much more worried about what their mothers would do if they had found out. She was already sure that they had been planning their wedding since they were five. “Don’t be a stranger Adam…”

“Just pick up the phone when I call Charlie,” Adam hummed, his tone almost dreamy as his hand came up to cup her cheek. Then he leaned in, placing a soft, warm kiss on her lips - one that would linger long after he left. 

“I’ll pick up, promise.”

“That’s my girl,” Adam praised, but when he pulled back he was wearing a solemn look. 

He hated goodbyes. 

And so did she. 

“Merry Christmas, Charlie,” was Adam’s final goodbye in the privacy of her bedroom, his thumb dragging over the skin of her cheek and neck before she was left completely void of his touch, “you were by far the best gift I got to unwrap this year.”

Her cheeks flushed red hot with color as she stepped back from the door. She hid just out of sight of anyone waiting just on the other side of the door. “Merry Christmas, Adam,” she spoke, her head leaning against the wall. It was from there that she watched him open up the door - his features falling into relief when he found that their parents were still very much entertained with each other’s company downstairs. He glanced back with a grin, one that silently screamed: SUCCESS, before he reached back and shut the door back into its place in the frame. Charlie didn’t move an inch, not even as she heard his heavy footsteps on the stairs just on the other side of the wall. There was nothing comforting about the sound of him leaving. Not when she so desperately wanted him to stay. Saying goodbye was something that had never been easy for them, not even as children - one of them had always cried. And now, they had made things a whole lot harder by blurring the lines between friendship and something more. 

Act 2. 

The warmth of the ski lodge was a welcome after a day spent out on the slopes. Charlotte’s body ached in all the worst places, but no one would have been able to guess it. Not with how she carried herself so well in a pair of heels and her short, yet elegant slip dress that hugged her body in all the right places. Her hair was left down in long, cascading curls, and her makeup was just enough to hide the sunburn. Charlotte and her best friend had escaped to the mountains for the holidays, the chalet was brought to life for the last big party of the year and she had let herself be consumed by it. By the music, and by the drink, hell, even the unwanted attention from guys, she thrived on it for it was all that could keep her mind from wandering to last Christmas. 

Last Christmas, seemed both like a century ago but also only yesterday in Charlotte’s mind. She could still so clearly remember the excitement of seeing Adam for the first time, and the sting of heartache as the days of the new year passed. They had tried to keep in touch, they really had - but with the time zones, and their busy schedules, it had led to an inevitable silence. She had to focus on her courses, and Adam got called up to the NHL, becoming the hot shot she had always told him he would be. Charlotte knew she should have known better. That she should have been prepared for ever the outcome, but it didn’t take away the ache in her chest that came with giving herself fully to Adam. 

Charlotte didn’t blame him, how could she? They both knew the risks, but that didn’t mean she wanted to risk seeing him again by going home for the holiday. It was too soon, it would only rip open the wound in her heart time was still trying so desperately to turn into a scar. A wound that was ripped open the moment she looked up from her drink and towards the bar when she heard the nickname she had tried to abandon echo in her mind like the beckoning of a ghost in the crowded room. 

“Charlie, I thought that was you!” Adam was pushing through the crowd that had formed around the table, dressed casually in a nice pair of blue jeans and a half-tucked button-down. He looked just as he had a year ago, the same face that had been burned into the back of her mind at the peak of her pleasure, save for the scruff that peppered his chin and jawline. Charlotte might have even thought it looked good on him if it hadn’t felt like someone had poured the salt from her margarita into an open wound - if she hadn’t felt like she was on the verge of throwing up. 

“Charlie?” one of her friends piped up, their brows furrowed. 

“A childhood nickname,” Charlotte rolled her eyes as her lips couldn’t find her drink fast enough. Her glass was near empty by the time Adam had reached the table, her face putting on a fake smile as she looked at her friend with eyes that looked as if they had been encased in candied sugar as they were consumed by the threat of tears. “This is Adam, we grew up together.”

Her friend didn’t need to hear much more than that. From the excitement of seeing him again to the pain of getting just sort of ghosted, she knew it all and it drew her face into a knot that she struggled to hide. “Oh, yeah, the hockey star,” her friend's words were like sweet venom that would kill you before you knew the poison you were drinking. 

“What are you doing here?” Charlotte’s voice almost broke as she shifted in her seat, her fist grasping at her empty glass desperately, “I thought you would spend the holiday back in Winnipeg with that tough schedule they keep you on-”

It was a casual jab at one of the many excuses he had used to explain his silence. Sorry I couldn’t text you I had a game… I had practice… I won’t be coming home for the summer, I’ve got training… They had all been just words on a screen then, his career too much for even a conversation with her then, but somehow, he had the time to celebrate the new year in Banff. It made her stomach sick. 

“Caught a trip out with some of the guys,” he nodded back towards the bar where a group of guys had gathered, some missing teeth, others bruised and banged up from their last games before their few days off, “we fly back out tomorrow, you should come to meet them-” 

Her heart was pounding like drums in her ears, her mouth falling open as she let out a steady, frustrated huff. How could he be acting so casually, so calmly? As if nothing had ever happened between them at all. Did he ever care about her at all? The thought hit her like an avalanche, sending a single glistening tear down her cheek as she abandoned her glass and pushed it up from the table. 

“I’m sorry,” was all she could manage, her voice broken as she let her eyes drop to the floor and she began to push her way through the crowded room. 

Charlotte didn’t look back when she heard Adam call after her, and persisted through the crowd as she hoped that she would lose her in it. She was small enough, she could slip out of just about any room unnoticed, but Adam he towered over almost everyone in any room. He could use that to his advantage - so Charlie didn’t stop until she was in the foyer of the chalet, where the music was almost reduced to silence and the view of the mountains in the distance could be seen out its grandiose windows. 

She let the way the silver mood beamed down onto the slopes calm her. The sight brought a semblance of peace as the ache in her heart raged on. A peace that was lost when the echo of heavy footsteps took the foyer, and Adam’s voice pierced the air, his annoyance clear, “Dammit Charlie, what was all of that about?”

Charlotte doesn’t look at him, she doesn’t even want to listen to him as she’s standing in front of the window - the winter’s chill sending goosebumps as it permeated the window’s failing seal - with her arms crossed over her chest and her gaze locked on the mountain tops. She could feel the burn of tears as they trailed down her cheeks, tears that she tried to hide from him as he approached. 

Adam came to sand on her left, his towering frame leaning against the cold glass of the window. She could see him out of the corner of her eye, his figure only slightly distorted by the tears that built up along her lashes and smudged her mascara. 

“You should go back to the party, Adam,” she had tried to tell him firmly, but her words broke as soon as she said his name. 

He didn’t make an effort to leave, it was going to take a lot more to get rid of him than that and it left Charlotte’s stomach in knots - and it was left near lurching as she felt the warmth of his hand encroach on the expanse of her back in a careful touch. 

“Adam, don’t-” she wanted to bite out, but her words were a pathetic mewl instead as her head spiraled. Oh, how good it felt to be reminded of how it felt to be touched by him. 

His touch lingered, his fingers slipping around her waist just enough to carefully turn her to face him. She was sure he could see it all now. The tears. Her tired frown. The pain that was coming to love him and knowing that she would never be loved by him the way she needed from him. It could all be seen in the sad glimmer of her eyes. 

“Oh, Charlie,” Adam sighed, his face falling, softening at the pain that was painted across her beautiful features. 

“Don’t patronize me-”

Her words were cut short as the embrace of his hand came to warm her cheek, leaving her lips parted as she let out an unsteady breath. His touch was careful, and tender, as it wiped away the tears that strained her cheek. And she wanted so desperately to lean into that touch. To embrace its comfort and let it consume her as she had let it last Christmas. 

“Adam, don’t,” her whisper was breathy, her head turning and eyes shutting as she felt the gentle guidance of his hand as Adam tried to draw him into her. 

Charlotte desperately wanted to give in - it would feel so good to give in to him. To let him make it feel like everything was going to be alright. That their relationship would always be more than that of childhood friends, but it would be a comfort built on falsehoods. She wasn’t going to let herself get built back up only to be left in shambles again. 

Raising a hand, Charlotte took hold of his carefully, guiding it to her lips and placing a kiss on his palm slowly. Her eyes fluttered shut as she inhaled the subtle scent of his cologne, and left the warmth of his skin lingering for but a moment during her tender gesture. Then, she guided his hand back to his side, and her warm eyes met his gaze. Adam held a sadness in his eyes, one that told her that she didn’t need to speak a single word to him to explain anything. He knew the sadness she felt - and maybe he felt it too. 

“It’s been really nice seeing you Adam,” Charlotte's words were broken as she spoke, a genuine smile taking her lips for the first time, “but I can’t be doing this, not again…” She gave his hand a gentle squeeze before her fingers slip from his like silk. 

Adam gave her a slow nod, the hand that had overtaken her back with the warm comfort of his touch leaving her void. Her chest ached as they held their gaze, the space between them growing as she took a careful step back. The air between them was suffocating, and it left Charlotte’s heart feeling tight in her chest.

It felt like a goodbye. A farewell to her childhood, to their friendship, and to any hope that either of them had that they would be able to sustain any kind of relationship into their adulthood. But life had taken them in separate directions. Adam with his career in Winnipeg - or anywhere else he could end up if he were to ever be traded away - and with Charlotte remaining close to her family and putting down her own roots in Calgary, there would always be too much of a divide. Too many obstacles to truly make something worse when they were both still so young and had so much more of their lives that were unknown just waiting to be uncovered. 

And so she left him standing in the foyer and made the walk back into the party alone. The ghost of his touch lingered as the music consumed her, her eyes growing bright as they fell on her friends that welcomed her back with smiles of their own. Smiles that almost eased the pain in her aching heart. It was a pain that told her that her love for Adam would never fade, and would go unforgotten. But with that pain, she could finally move on. 

[tippedbykreider]

something just like this - epilogue 2 l c. parayko

Thank you to the ever wonderful @antoineroussel for arranging the Winter Fic Exchange 2023 <3

I was given the lovely @senditcolton as my giftee - Colt and Cassie are back and they're bringing the tinsel!

Big thanks to @laurenairay for giving it a read through for me as I'm severely out of practice. I would also like to apologise to any native Greek or Italian speakers, as I am neither and I'm having to rely on good old Google, which I appreciate doesn't quite capture the nuances of the native language. This has also been very loosely proofread so if you see any typos, you didn't :)

Warnings: alcohol mention, proposal

Word count: 5.3k

If you're new to Colton and Cassie, you can check out the first installment of this series here

Cassandra Constantinou had gone home to New York for Christmas for as long as she had lived away from the city. Every year she would pack herself a small bag and brave the hustle and bustle of St Louis Lambert International to make the short plane journey home to Brooklyn. Even after meeting the love of her life in the form of a 6 foot 6, Canadian, golden retriever of a man named Colton, Cassie would still head home for Christmas and be back in St Louis for New Year. Colton didn’t mind, of course, as his schedule had always been less than favourable and he would never begrudge Cassie the opportunity to be with her family; but he would’ve been lying if he said that he’d never thought about what it would be like to wake up beside her on Christmas morning - although he supposed it would be like any other morning, except with added tinsel.

This year, though, things were going to be a little different and Colton Parayko couldn’t have been happier about it.

It was pure luck, really, the way things came about. A fortuitous bounce with scheduling meant that the Blues would be playing at home between Christmas and New Year and Colton couldn’t help but take advantage of the opportunity in front of him.

It had started out as a completely innocent suggestion one late-October evening as the two of them shared a bath together. The wine had been flowing, as it so often did when he had some time off the next day, and conversation had steered towards the upcoming holiday season. Cassandra had already made sure her annual leave was in place to ensure she had the maximum amount of time with Colton, all that was left to do was break the news to her family that she would be spending Christmas in St Louis.

“You know, I’ve been thinking,” Colton murmured against Cassie’s shoulder.

“Sounds ominous,” she replied with a grin.

“Your parents could come here for Christmas.”

Cassie immediately shifted to look Colton in the face.

“Here? In St Louis?”

“I mean, that is where we live, yeah,” he teased.

“I thought you said you wanted a quiet Christmas?”

“I did”

“Inviting my parents to stay would be the complete opposite of a quiet Christmas,” Cassie countered. “You might even say that it would be a very, very loud Christmas.”

“You don’t think it would be fun?” he asked with a smile.

“I think it would make you reconsider our relationship.”

“Come on, Cass,” he reasoned. “It’s not like I’ve never met your parents before.”

“That was different,” Cassie contested. “We could escape to Manhattan and spend the day sightseeing when we were there in the summer. Besides, Christmas is a completely different beast. It’s like they go full Gremlin over the holidays. It’s complete insanity.”

“I think it’d be nice,” Colton shrugged. “They could bring your nonna.”

Cassie took a long, drawn out sip of her wine and Colton could almost see the cogs turning as Cassie relived every single Christmas she’d ever spent with her family. It’s not as if Colton was suggesting the entire Gamberini clan make the trip to Missouri, which would decrease the craziness factor by at least ten, but it would still be a far cry from the peaceful, relaxing Christmas she had been envisioning.

“Besides,” Colton added, pressing a soft kiss to Cassie’s shoulder blade. “Kind of wanna see what an Italian-Greek Christmas is like. I bet the food is amazing.”

Cassie shifted completely and turned to face Colton, setting her wine glass down on the side table and climbing into his lap.

“Your nutritionist will kill you,” she smirked, running her fingers through his shaggy hair.

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

Colton’s eyes were sparkling in the low light of the room and he was wearing his signature easy grin that Cassandra loved so much. It was effortless, then, to give in to his request and she couldn’t help her own smile that formed on her lips as she thought of her parents and her nonna sitting at their dining table laden with food and wine. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction, though. Not yet, anyway.

“I’ll think about it,” she said as nonchalantly as she could manage.

“I’ll start looking for flights tomor-”

Colton’s words died on his tongue as Cassandra claimed his lips for her own and his thoughts were filled with nothing but how good it felt to have her body pressed into his.

*

There was only one other time that Colton had seen Cassandra completely morph into her mother and even then, it was something that he hadn’t realised had happened until he went to visit Giovanna and Hector during the summer. There was something about impending visitors that seemed to trigger Cassandra’s Gamberini genes and not a single cushion or candlestick could be out of place. The first time this had happened had been in early April, when Colton’s parents came into town and he’d come home from practice to find her half hanging out of the second floor window as she tried to clean the glass. The next day she had been up a ladder cleaning the ceiling light fixture in the entryway. Both of these things he’d seen Giovanna do during their summer visit and the resemblance between mother and daughter when it came to household cleanliness was startling, even down to the headscarves they would both wear, presumably to keep their dark hair out of their eyes as they worked.

When Colton arrived home with the groceries Cassie was in the middle of vacuuming. It had been three years since Cassie had come into Colton’s life like a complete force of nature and he still found himself being completely struck by just how beautiful she was, even during those everyday moments of mundane domesticity. He knew just how much of a cliche that was, of course, but as he watched her in a pair of leggings and one of his old university t-shirts that swamped her frame, with her chocolate hair piled high on top of her head and wrapped in one of those bright silken headscarves, he found that familiar feeling of warmth spreading through his chest like a shot of whisky on a cold day. She was singing to herself as she pushed the vacuum along the hardwood floor, Colton could tell by the movements of her mouth to the music the loud drone of the Dyson was competing with.

Cassandra felt Colton’s presence before she saw him, she always could. She didn’t care how insane it sounded but the house always seemed to feel different when he was around, like the walls themselves were alive and warm and breathing. She turned and caught him disappearing into the kitchen, his arms laden with grocery bags. She shut off the vacuum and followed him, turning down the stereo as she went.

“Hope it wasn’t too busy?” she asked as she began to put the groceries away.

Colton pressed a gentle kiss to her hair as he passed her on his way back out to the car.

“Nah, it was okay. I figured we’d go out and get the lamb for the Christmas dinner together though, if that’s okay? I had a look while I was out but honestly? I had no idea and it just… I don’t know, it’s important to your family and to your dad and I just wanna get it right.”

Cassandra’s whole expression softened at that, because even though this kind of thoughtfulness was something she’d come to expect from Colton, it always managed to knock her back a bit all the same. She took one of his large hands in both of hers as she looked up at him.

“Of course it’s okay, γλυκέ μου. We can go this afternoon if you like?”

“Is that not going to be too hectic for you with doing the airport run?”

“We should be fine, their flight doesn’t get in until 7:10.”

“Thank you,” Colton said sincerely, his eyes on Cassie’s.

“Hey, I should be thanking you,” she replied with a little shake of her head. “It means so much to me that this matters to you as much as it does and I really, really appreciate you and everything you’ve done today. I know it was a late one for you last night with travelling back from Winnipeg and all and you’ve been a huge help.”

“We’re a team,” Colton said matter of factly but with a gentle smile and a softness in his eyes as he surveyed Cassandra. “And you’ve completely blitzed this place. It looks beautiful, πουλάκι μου; the tree, the decorations, all of it.”

“I think I just need to set up the guest rooms and we’re about ready.”

“Leave the groceries to me then,” Colton pressed gently. “I’ll make sure everything gets put away.”

“You got everything on the list?”

“I did,” he assured her with a smile, holding up three fingers on his free hand. “Scout’s honour.”

His grin widened at the little laugh Cassie gave him as she let go of his hand.

“I’ve got it all under control here,” he continued. “Just let me know what you need me to finish off down here and I’ll make sure it’s done.”

“The floors need cleaning but I think that’s about it.”

“Mop the floors, got it,” Colton affirmed. “And once you’re done in the guest rooms I’m gonna run you a nice hot bath, yeah?”

Cassie smiled at that and she was certain that Colton Parayko may just be the most thoughtful man she’d ever met.

*

It was official: Cassandra and Colton’s fridge was fit to burst. How Colton had managed to squeeze everything in there, Cassandra would never know but she was sure that he must have been a world class Tetris champion in a previous life. The amount of food that was in their house was, frankly, obscene, even by Mediterranean standards and Cassie wasn’t sure there were enough hours in the day to actually cook it all. She made a mental note to ask Colton if any of the rookies were without a dinner on Christmas day, she’d be a meals on wheels service if it meant getting rid of it all.

Colton was cooking in the kitchen as Cassie tied the laces on her sneakers.

“It smells amazing, λατρεία μου,” she called out, pulling her coat on and wrapping a large scarf around her neck.

“That’s because it’s one of your recipes,” Colton laughed from the kitchen as he began seasoning the steak.

“I don’t cook steak as good as you though,” Cassie countered as she appeared in the doorway, a small grin playing on her lips. “You always season it perfectly.”

“But I season it exactly as you’ve written it down.”

“Must be all the love you put into it then,” she grinned, going up onto her tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek.

“You heading out to the airport?” he asked as he set the meat to one side to rest.

“Mhm.”

Colton washed his hands before turning to Cassie and wrapping his arms around her, his eyes soft as he surveyed her. She looked tired, he noted, the kind of tiredness a lot of people get in the run up to the holidays, but the stress that had started to make a home in her features in the weeks before she finished work for Christmas had melted away and that was something, at least. He was determined, then, to make sure that he gave her a Christmas to remember for all of the right reasons.

“Drive safe, yeah?” he murmured softly, pressing a gentle kiss to the crown of her head.

“Always do,” she replied with a smile. “I’ll call you when we’re on our way back.”

With a chaste kiss to her lips, Colton let Cassie go, walking with her to her car and waiting on the driveway until he saw her car turn out of the street and disappear from view.

*

Cassie shifted her weight from foot to foot as she waited at arrivals at St Louis Lambert International. Mercifully, the flight in from LaGuardia was on time and providing that the wait for the bags wasn’t too long, she’d clocked that she could be at home with a glass of red wine in hand within an hour. She watched with a smile as families were reunited for the holidays with shared embraces and happy tears, and in some strange way it had almost made her homesick for New York City. It had been the first time that Cassie had been on this side of arrivals when seeing her parents (it had always been her doing the travelling, after all) and she couldn’t quite work out if it felt wrong because she was missing going back to New York for Christmas or because it was simply a new experience. ‘Wrong’ was probably the wrong word for it, she thought, because Christmas with Colton felt good and right and like a dream, but it still wasn’t quite thirty people shoehorned around a hodgepodge of dinner tables (of varying heights) and chairs, gesticulating wildly and shouting over one another to be heard. Although Cassandra supposed that nothing really could ever come close to that experience.

She cast her mind back to the Christmas of 2006, the year her Baba’s family came over from Greece to celebrate the holidays. Her Nonno was still alive then and she found herself completely awestruck at how he seemed to come to an unspoken understanding with her Pappou, despite the two men not speaking each others’ languages and them both having limited mastery of English. The two men would often sit at the dining table, drinking coffee and playing cards, while occasionally making ‘universal grandpa sounds’. It was also the closest Cassie had seen her mother come to a nervous breakdown, but that was also to be expected when both Cassie’s Nonna and Yiayia were trying to assert dominance in the kitchen. There’s nothing quite as terrifying as two Mediterranean women trying to cook different types of food for Christmas in a small kitchen in an apartment in Brooklyn. She distinctly remembered that Christmas being the loudest yet and how both her parents uttered the words “never again” as they waved off her Yiayia and Pappou at the airport. Her Greek grandparents hadn’t been back to America since and while Cassie knew that a large part of that was due to them getting older and their health not quite being what it was, she also suspected that it had a lot to do with America not being Greek enough and the fact that it snowed near enough every day they were there.

She wondered what Colton’s Christmasses were like back home in Canada and if they had any traditions and immediately thought about how they might be able to incorporate those into their cross-continent celebrations. Cassie knew there was turkey involved, though, owing to the fact there was one lounging in her fridge back home. It would be the first time either her or her parents would be having turkey for Christmas, the meat of choice usually being veal or lamb, and Cassie wondered how her Nonna would take it.

As if on cue, Cassie’s eyes found the little frame of her beloved Gioia Gamberini, with her parents close behind. Cassie called out to her Nonna, whose eyesight wasn’t quite what it once was, as she seemed to scan the many faces at arrivals. A lump formed in her throat at the sight of her Nonna’s face breaking into the biggest smile as she finally laid her eyes on her beloved granddaughter.

“Cassandra!” she beamed. “Vieni qui. Lascia che ti guardi.”

Cassandra enveloped her Nonna into a hug, stooping to match the old woman’s height and staying there as her grandmother took Cassandra’s face in her hands.

“Ancora bello,” she smiled. “Sei raggiante di felicità. Ti sta ancora trattando bene?”

“Sta cucinando in casa mentre parliamo,” Cassie replied with a grin.

“Bravo ragazzo.”

“Fammi entrare. Smettila di tenere Cassandra per te,” Giovanna interrupted as she opened her arms for Cassie. “There’s my baby.”

Cassandra found herself being bundled into her mother’s arms, kisses being placed all over her face while her Nonna continued to tell her how beautiful she is. Giovanna eventually pulled back to survey her daughter with keen eyes.

“Let me look at you, make sure he’s feeding you right.”

“Mama-”

“Good, good. Still a little on the thin side but we’ll work on that,” Giovanna nodded.

“Can I please hug my daughter now?” Hector asked, a hint of exasperation in his voice.

Cassandra ducked out of her mother’s embrace and stepped right into her father’s waiting arms.

“Cassandra, Λουλούδι μου.” He pressed a soft kiss to the crown of her head. “You look healthy, happy.” Hector’s eyes were shining as he looked at Cassie, “Was the drive here okay?”

“All painless,” Cassie assured him. “Traffic wasn’t too bad and Colt is cooking dinner as we speak so we’ll be able to eat when we get back and then we’ll give you the grand tour of the house.”

“Two house moves in as many years, Cassandra,” her mother replied as they waited for the luggage to come onto the carousel. “You must be crazy.”

“Thankfully I wasn’t in the old place long enough to accumulate clutter and Colton’s didn’t have much either. I don’t think we realised how little furniture we had until we moved into the new house. We definitely gave our bank accounts a hammering getting the new place furnished.”

“You should have said, Cassie,” he father scolded gently. “We could have given you some money towards furniture.”

“That’s really generous of you, Baba,” Cassie said, putting her arm around his shoulders. “But Colt and I had it covered.”

“We’re very proud of you, you know,” Hector replied. “All your hard work and now you’re seeing success. It makes my heart happy. All my life I hoped that you would have a wonderful life and that you would have all the things that I didn’t and now here you are.”

Cassandra swallowed the lump in her throat down and pressed a soft kiss to her father’s cheek.

“I couldn’t have done any of this without you and mom, you do know that, right?”

“Oh please,” Giovanna interjected. “You’ve worked damn hard for this, we just fed ya and clothed ya.”

“Well, I appreciate the feeding and clothing all the same,” Cassie laughed softly.

It took another 15 minutes for the bags to appear and further 15 to get everybody seated and settled in the car. Cassie had swapped her Mercedes coupe for a more practical SUV around 8 months prior and Hector quickly busied himself with testing out what all the different knobs and buttons did on the centre console. Cassie called Colton on the way home as promised and before long she was pulling the car into the driveway, the Christmas lights on their porch twinkling in welcome against the dark December night.

*

It was a little after 8am when Cassie stirred the next morning, head a little fuzzy from the bottle of red wine she’d had the night before. ‘Nonna’s doing,’ she thought to herself. ‘I never could say no to her’. She smiled as she thought back to dinner the night before; the little look of pride on Colton’s face as her father praised his steak, quickly replaced by one of boyish sheepishness when Nonna Gioia started to wax poetic about how handsome he was. Her mother had helped Colton clear the table and soon enough everyone had retired to the lounge to drink wine while Dean Martin played softly in the background just for Nonna.

Cassie cursed the empty bottle of Barolo in the kitchen as she dragged herself out of bed, the space where Colton slept already empty and cold.

‘He’s been up for a while, then,’ she thought.

She pulled on her robe as she exited the bedroom, the undeniable smell of eggs and bacon wafting up the stairs and along the hallway to greet her. She could hear her Nonna’s broken English, followed quickly by Colton’s rich laughter and she couldn’t stop the smile from tugging the corner of her lips upwards until it was a full grin.

“What mischief is going on in here, then?” she asked as she entered the kitchen.

“Nonna was telling me about how you used to run around her apartment naked, eating olives,” Colton grinned.

“I would like to clarify that I was three years old at the time,” Cassie countered, hiding her face as Colton laughed again.

“What’re you talking about? You still do that now.”

“Oh my god,” Cassie groaned. “Can you not?” She turned to her Nonna and pointed a finger at her, “Mi piace quest'uomo. Non spaventarlo.”

Nonna merely cackled and took another sip of her coffee, paying no heed to Cassandra in the slightest.

“Non c'è modo di spaventarlo,” Gioia shrugged. “Ti ama troppo.”

Gioia gave her granddaughter a knowing look before shuffling out of the kitchen to sit in the armchair in the orangery to watch the birds outside.

“She’s a riot,” Colton smiled as he continued preparing the eggs.

“She is,” Cassie agreed, pouring herself a coffee before refilling Colton’s mug. “No sign of my parents yet?”

“Your mom is reading her book in bed with her coffee and your dad went out for his morning walk. Think he wants to scope out the neighbourhood.”

“God, he’s so nosey,” Cassie huffed out a laugh. “You should have woke me up, I coulda helped with breakfast.”

“I tried,” Colton teased. “You were out cold, mouth open, snoring.”

“Liar.”

He simply laughed in response, cracking another egg into the pan as Cassie hopped up onto the counter beside him.

“I figured you could use the lie in.”

“That wine was like rocket fuel,” Cassie groused as she nursed her coffee mug. “Why aren’t you hungover anyway? You drank just as much as I did.”

“Faster metabolism, maybe?” he shrugged.

“Life is so unfair.”

“Go sit with your Nonna, I can handle it in here,” Colton said gently.

“You sure?”

“Positive,” he assured her. “Go catch up and talk about me in Italian.”

“Oh you’d love that, wouldn’t you?” Cassie teased as she hopped down from the counter.

Colton gently grabbed her by the waist and pulled her into his body, bending down to press a soft kiss to her lips. Cassie grabbed his tshirt gently with her free hand to deepen the kiss, giving him just enough before pulling away with a grin.

“Get outta here,” Colton laughed breathlessly, watching with a coy grin as Cassie sashayed out of the kitchen.

*

Once breakfast had been served and eaten, attention could turn to the most important order of business: the food. Christmas Eve had always been an important day for Cassandra and her family; it was the day where they would spend time together in the kitchen, making panettone and christopsomo, baklava and, of course, pasta. Colton was certain that he’d never seen so much food in all of his life and he knew that he was going to need to enlist the help of his teammates to eat it all. In fact, he reckoned that there was enough food prepared to do Christmas dinner three times over.

Giovanna had prepared a lasagne for dinner, which again was washed down with copious amounts of red wine and Colton watched with teary eyes as Cassie and her father sang traditional Greek carols in the living room once the dishes had been cleared away. It was easy then to get swept along in his thoughts about what he hoped his life would be like next year and the year after that and even in ten years’ time. One thing remained constant in these thoughts, though and that was the woman sat beside him, cheeks flushed from her red wine buzz and eyes sparkling even brighter than the lights on the tree. Colton wanted this with Cassandra for the rest of his life, he was sure of it and he couldn’t help but feel blessed that the most important people in her life, the people in that living room with them both, had accepted him into their family. It was big and bold and both the same and unlike his own in so many ways, but it was hers and it was perfect. She was perfect and as he pulled her into his side and pressed a kiss to her forehead, just as he’d done many times before, his mind wandered to the little box upstairs, hidden inside of a pair of socks in their dresser.

*

There was a certain stillness in the early morning that Colton had learned to appreciate over the years. Plenty of early rises during his hockey career meant that it didn’t have quite the same sting as it used to and he often used those moments of calm and quiet to prepare himself, both mentally and physically, for the day ahead. This morning was different though, he had nowhere to be and he almost cursed himself for waking up so early on Christmas day, like a child excited to see what Santa had brought. But then he paused and looked at Cassie’s sleeping form beside him in bed and he was thankful, thankful that he would get to spend those extra hours he would have been sleeping just appreciating what he had and the woman who looked so at peace. His eyes roamed the gentle contours of her body beneath the duvet until they settled on the chocolate locks that had half fallen into her face, her Mediterranean features set in a soft stillness that made his heart swell in his chest like a rising tide. She was beautiful to Colton, yes, but it was the kind of beauty that went beyond the surface. Cassandra Constantinou’s soul was beautiful too.

He slipped out of bed as quietly as he could muster and went to the dresser that stood opposite the end of the bed, opening his sock drawer and looking for the gaudy elf stockings socks that Cassie had bought him for Christmas two years prior. He rooted about at the bottom of the drawer until he pulled them out, unable to ignore the slight tremble in his hands as he did so. He unballed the socks, revealing a small velvet box, which he took before closing the drawer. He stood for a moment with it in his hands, so small within his large palm and yet weighted like a neutron star with promise, commitment and everlasting love. It hit him then, like a rogue wave and he found his eyes brimming with tears as he looked at Cassandra, still sound asleep in their bed. He wondered if she knew just how her gravity affected him, how she pulled him in so effortlessly and kept him there. He wondered if she knew just how much he loved and worshipped her, how proud she made him, and how much better his life was for her being in it. He hoped she knew all of that.

He took a deep, settling breath and walked towards Cassie’s side of the bed, kneeling beside it and using one of his hands to brush her hair out of her face while the other gripped the ring box tightly. His smile was soft as she stirred, her eyes finding his immediately as they opened.

“Merry Christmas, Cass,” he whispered, earning him a sleepy smile.

“Merry Christmas, Colt.”

Cassie smiled at the rhythmic feeling of Colton’s hand stroking her hair before furrowing her brow slightly.

“What time’s’it?” she asked.

“A little after 6,” Colton grinned as Cassie groaned.

“That’s so early,” she grumbled. “God you and your early riser bodyclock.”

“I promise it’s for a good reason,” he whispered.

“Yeah?” Cassie sat up in bed slightly. “And what’s that then?”

“Wanted to ask you something,” Colton replied, a nervous smile playing on his lips. Cassie only nodded and so Colton took a deep breath before speaking again. “Cass, you are literally the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. You’re smart, kind, generous, so damn funny, God, you make me laugh every single day. I’ve never met anyone with as much spark and passion as you and it’s there in literally everything you do. You’ve taught me so much and I’m just… so thankful for you and grateful to have you in my life.”

“Colton,” Cassie sniffled.

“And I love your family. I love how they’ve made me feel so welcome and like I’m a part of it.”

“You are, Colt,” Cassie replied softly, a rogue tear escaping her eye and rolling down her cheek. “They love you.”

“And I love you, more than anything and…” Colton took another breath, holding out the small box to Cassandra for her to open it. “I want this with you for the rest of my life.”

Cassandra wasn’t sure at what point she’d stopped breathing, but all the air was knocked out of her lungs as she opened up the box to reveal a beautiful trilogy ring that seemed to sparkle even with barely any light in the room, as if it was starlight incarnate.

“Cassandra Giulia Constantinou, would you make me the happiest guy in the world and be my wife?”

Cassandra could only manage a nod as the tears streamed down her face, happiness washing over her like a river breaking loose from a dam. Colton’s arms were around her next, warm and safe and familiar as he sniffled against her hair, his lips planting flowers against her to crown her head.

“I love you,” he murmured into the chocolate strands of her hair. “I love you.”

Cassie pulled back a shade to get her eyes on his, both pairs shining with matching tears of joy.

“I love you too,” she whispered softly.

He took her left hand and slid the ring onto her finger, his eyes never leaving the expression of pure happiness that was etched onto her features, before cupping the back of her head and pulling her in for a deep kiss. Cassie’s hand came up to cup his cheek, bringing him closer still as she poured herself into the kiss, their tongues dancing together in the way that only they knew how. They parted only when their lips were swollen and their chests heaving, Colton resting his forehead against Cassandra’s as he held her.

“How long have you been planning this?” Cassie asked softly after a few moments.

“A while,” Colton admitted. “Although deciding to do it today was only a recent decision. Your dad and I did a lot of talking when you weren’t around.”

“You asked my Baba?” Cassie sniffled, the tears back once more.

“I really like and respect your dad and it’s only right that I ask for his permission to marry his only child and daughter.”

“God, you have no idea how much that will have meant to him,” Cassie choked as she fought to keep her tears at bay. “And to me.”

Colton kissed her forehead softly before helping her to her feet and putting her robe on her.

“Come on,” he said softly. “There’s some people who want to celebrate with us.”

He led her out of the bedroom and down the hallway to the top of the stairs, her mother, father and Nonna waiting for them at the bottom with the champagne already poured and not a dry eye between them.

“I thought you chicken out,” Nonna teased Colton with a grin.

“Chicken out of marrying this one? Never.”

Cassie looked up at Colton, smile brighter than the ring on her finger that glittered like sunlight on fresh snow, and cupped his face, pulling him in for a chaste kiss and murmuring against his lips.

“This has been the best Christmas ever.”

[wildrangers]

Hi!! This is your winter fic exchange anon. I have a few questions for you:

1. So based off of the players and themes you selected (Nico Hischier. Quinn Hughes. William Nylander. Matt Boldy. Connor Dewar. Joel Eriksson Ek. Mason Shaw. Kirill Kaprizov. Cale Makar. Jack Hughes. Elias Pettersson. Andrei Svechnikov. Trevor Zegras. Ryan Lindgren. Alexis Lafreniere. K'Andre Miller. Dougie Hamilton. fluff, smut (18+ only), angst - with a happy ending. Reader Insert or OC), do you have a specific set preferences in mind (Ex. you would really prefer if I wrote for Cale Makar/you would prefer anything fluff) or could I just pick any of these things for the story?

2. I like to write based off of songs so do you have any specific songs (or artists) in mind or could I pick any song?

3. Do you prefer for the fic to be set in the winter, around Christmas or New Years or any other winter holiday, or it doesn’t matter to you when the story is set?

4. Do you like 3+1 or 4+1 stories?

5. Do you like already established relationship stories or do you prefer a story that establishes the relationship?

Thank you :)

Hi!! I’m so excited to see what you come up with 🥰

1. So I put a ton of people to make it easier for her to match me up with someone. I’d say my top 5 would be Nico, Cale, Quinn, William, and Joel but again anyone on that list works too. I don’t really have a preference for type of fic as long as it’s resolved at the end. I slightly prefer reader insert but OC would be great too!

2. I LOVE THIS. I am a huge Swiftie but also enjoy Greta Van Fleet, Florence and the Machine, Harry Styles, and Maggie Rogers. If you’re not familiar with those artists though, that’s totally cool and you can surprise me with a different artist/song.

3. Id prefer it to have a winter setting but it doesn’t have to be holiday specific or a huge focal point.

4. YES LOVE THESE

5. I love both equally. I tend to write stories that establishes relationships so I’m always impressed when writers can create an established relationship right off the bat. Whatever your heart desires ☺️

Let me know if any more questions pop up!

[nylwnder]

hello again, it's your secret exchange fic writer! back again to ask some questions, some maybe for writing purposes, some maybe just for fun! here we go!

what's your favorite color? favorite season? what are some places you'd like to travel to? what are your top 5 songs on repeat right now? what's one thing you'd like to be really good at without trying?

hello love!!! ouuu i’m excited for these,,,, alright 😌 i’ll put them under the cut! <3

the way whats your fav colour is such a hard question for me BYEEE. i dont know, i mean generally speaking i’d say yellow and blue. but specifically, lavender and sage.

fav season is def fall!!!!!! just the right temperatures, all the pretty colours, and hoodie and sweats szn.

i’d love to travel to italy and paris ofc! i really wanna check out like the country/cozy side of london/scotland/ireland. and spain too! and mexico cause i NEED me that authentic street food.

my top 5 songs rn??? hold up lemme check my on repeat list on spotify lmao…….. okay so : always love by lauren jauregui , billie toppy by men i trust , mr. schwartz by arctic monkeys , good good by tanerélle and so damn into you by vlad holiday. a bonus would be collide by tiana major9 and earthgang.

that’s a great question wow. i can’t really come up with anything on the spot other than not giving a fuck??? like i mean i always always always overthink shit and sometimes it can like totally put me down and i just hate it cause it’s such a bad habit. if i could just not care all the time, it would be nice :-)

[laurenairay]

me again because I'm working on the fic literally right now but I have Andre texting his teammates about Noel (the OC) but tbh I have no idea who on the team Andre would text about girl stuff. Do you have any idea or have like two or three players on the Kraken you would want to see in the fic as well interacting with Andre and Noel?

Hello again!

Well I know that he’s pretty close to Grubi (this is their third team together) and I feel like he would happily chat with him about anything. On the team I feel like Larsson and Wennberg might be a go to with the Swedish angle, and tbh even texting gabe landeskog might still be a thing there too. I hope that helps/makes sense!!