#then they try to gatekeep amabs then they say afabs aren’t oppressed enough to be nb

[volvolts]

In order to be nonbinary according to twitter is to look like a fucking fantasy elf

[stfudiscoinfernoed]

1/ What’s interesting is that this whole “inclusivity” talk happens only in wlw/Sapphic spaces. Lesbians, bisexual women, and trans women want a space only for ourselves? Then it’s suddenly gatekeeping and problematic and Bad™. It happens on all levels and it is infuriating. We can’t have shit. IRL example: the only Sapphic library in my small town now has to accommodate trans men for some reason the second they started openly accepting trans women? it’s not the same thing ffs!

2/ Online example: every discord srver and subreddit I’ve been in (even those who have shit like “only lesbians” or “only sapphics” in the name) have a paragraphs long disclaimer about being inclusive and not shunning anyone. You don’t see that shit in mlm spaces. You just don’t. You're politely asked to leave, at best. Try being a trans lesbian on a mlm only space, I dare you. 

So I have some thoughts as to why this is. It’s a bit long so under the cut it goes:

Firstly, I think the intersection of heterosexism and misogyny means that sapphic people tend to be more invested in dismantling gendered oppression which includes addressing how trans people fit into the system. This is why you see both a large number of highly vocal pro-trans sapphics as well as very vocal TERF sapphics. I won’t say that mlm spaces are more focused on the single issue of heterosexism as there are plenty of mlm who are invested in dismantling other systems of oppression like racism and ableism, but the fight against gendered oppression is not as central to mlm spaces.

It’s this investment in dismantling gendered oppression that leads to pro-trans sapphic spaces being inclusive to all trans people, because they recognize the difficulty of creating or finding trans inclusive spaces and the way that trans men and afab nonbinary people are impacted by issues typically thought of as “women’s issues”. It’s often done in incredibly misguided ways that harms everyone involved, because the efforts are usually directed by cis sapphics and afab nonbinary sapphics (and the occasional trans man who refuses to get rid of the lesbian/sapphic label after coming out as a trans man) and as a result can turn a bit bioessentialist. This is also why spaces that purportedly are for everyone but cis men can be actually pretty hostile to amab nonbinary people and trans women who don’t present femme enough.

Mlm spaces don’t tend to be super vocal about trans inclusion because of their lack of investment in dismantling gendered oppression. This means that trans and nonbinary mlm tend to be pretty invisible and trans issues in the mlm community are rarely discussed. This can and should be changed, but it requires getting mlm spaces to care about gendered oppression and that will slow down efforts.

Secondly, the trans women who want to be in mlm spaces and trans men who want to be in wlw spaces tend to be straight and/or have absorped a very bioessentialist understanding of being trans/gay. You say “try being a trans lesbian in a mlm only space” as if gay trans men are barging through the doors of sapphic spaces as if they own the place. I have never seen a gay trans man who wanted to be in wlw spaces. Nonbinary people who aren’t sapphic and trans men rarely, in my experience, want to be involved in sapphic spaces. There are absolutely some and they make the issue of enforcing sapphic only spaces more difficult, but by and large we are uncomfortable being lumped into the “women and trans” category and shunted off to being involved in sapphic spaces.

TL;DR: The feminist orientation of many sapphic spaces is largely why trans inclusion tends to be a big deal in sapphic over mlm spaces, not necessarily because of misogyny or because trans people who aren’t sapphic are banging on the door trying to be let (though there may be small aspects of that).

Lastly, where tf are you that your small town has a sapphic library?? Most small towns would struggle to have a gay bar or a feminist library let alone a sapphic only library.