#there’s no guarantee that no matter what I may be that I’ll be happy

[whimsyprinx]

do y’all think stars are happy

[precious-little-scoundrel]

| Ida’s Law

Introductory Part

Summary: The American War Effort had conceded to the enlisting and commissioning of women into the Air Force at semi-integrated status. Deemed a more reliable if not safer combat post, the going rank of officer in the Air Force was intended to secure fair treatment and combatant status for these women, as it had for their male counterparts. Like most things in war -or life, if one is a woman- such recognition must be fought for.

Warnings: disturbing content- if you made it through last one this one should be a breeze, however it picks up where we left off so expect mentions of war, wounds, illusions to past rapes, Nazis being racist fucks, possibly some internalized misogyny about it all and some hopefully very 🥹🤧 reunions

A Note Going Forward: With this part now published, I am happy to open this series up for prompts. Ideally I’d like this series to end up being exclusively prompt-inspired and will be putting out prompt lists accordingly. I think that will be a fun way to keep the interaction going, stretch my own skills and explore all the different scenarios that may intrigue y’all. You’re welcome to come up with your own prompts, too. All are welcome, none guaranteed but let’s be real -I’m obsessed with this AU so I’ll likely do it. For now I’ll be keeping all writing to POW Camp and Liberation and Post-Liberation timelines.

“Well, what do we know?” Ida Brady asked the first officer out on the other side as they began to filter through the laborious processing of the camp. She counted them down, one familiar face after another appearing through the doorway again with no worse indignity than the new identification tags hanging from their necks.

“I hate a guy named Johann, and I like a guy named Fritz, and the lieutenant guy wasn’t bad.” Maureen declared, straightening her precious cap atop muddy auburn tresses. “Who went and named their son Fritz after the last war? I mean really? Who does that to a kid? It’s like he’s making up for it now, though, awfully nice.”

“Mm, I thought so, too.” Ida hummed, “Might keep an eye on that one, work on him a bit. You think, Kendeigh?”

“Work on him yourself, Ida.” Maureen scoffed.

“Not much to work with.” Ida retorted, the first general reference to her disfigurement she’d made. “What do you know? What’s up?” she left off to inquire after Tallulah Smith who came out the other side of processing looking more than exasperated.

“Know? They don’t know squat.” she said, “Never heard of a Cherokee.”

“I’ll be.” Maureen was grinning sharply. “Wasn't enough being a woman for ya Smith, ya had to go and be a brown one.”

“You’re tellin’ me.” She griped, “They kept insisting I was a fighter pilot. That’s what all the ‘dark ones’ are, according to them. Told them I’d rewire their insides and maybe then they’d take my engineering degree seriously.”

“I’d like to see that.” Maureen murmured, drowsiness beginning to take over at the comparative calm of their new surroundings.

“Looks like we got everyone, yeah?” Ida peered over the heads of the crowing room and counted out her charges in a silent tally.

“Looks like.” Smith agreed. “Got billet assignments?”

“I do. Colonel Clark, most senior prisoner here, said the combines are strict but the rooms aren’t. Let’s try to behave until we feel our way, then we can swap, if they allow.”

“It’s going to smell like feet no matter where and who we share it with.” Smith pointed out and Ida heaved a great sigh as if that were the hardest prospect she’d yet encountered.

“Mm.”

“Buck is out there!” Maureen suddenly cried out, grabbing at Ida’s arm, pointing out the window at the muddy yard.

“How nice. Gotta get this sorted first, eyes in, Kendeigh.”

Maureen reluctantly tore her eyes away from her dearly missed pilot. “Yes sir.”

“All right,” Ida’s voice carried as well as it ever had, commanding immediate quiet and attention, “those in the 350th, 419th, -the hundredth!- on me. Gather ‘round. That’s it, come on. Alright, well, we made it, well done. Truly, well done to all of you. Now I know you well enough to not accuse any of you of being pure idiots, just because we made it to where we wanted to go doesn’t mean any of what’s ahead is going to be easy. Be wary, don’t let your guard down, you don’t know plenty of these men and they don’t know you, I’m sure there are measures in place for spying already. Be sensible. I am certain we can rely on the kindness of those in the hundredth, but even then keep in mind, if you are cold, they are too, if you're hungry, you best believe they are hungrier, the last thing we need is a crisis of chivalry in here. Rely on them, except their help, but don’t ever take from them. Understood? And one more thing, since the human spirit is irrepressible I feel it’s warranted to make one more housekeeping note. None, and I do mean none, no inner relations at all are allowed. I don’t care how cold you are, how sweet he’s been, or how much you’ve missed him. The Red Cross aren’t sending rubbers, and don’t ever take the promise of a pull out. Do you want a one-way ticket to a death camp or a bullet to the head? Get pregnant. Simple as that. You think the Jerries think poorly of you now for being female? Try being a matron. The point is to blend in as much as possible, keep that in mind. Whatever you do, keep that in mind. Understood?”

“Yes sir!”

“Colonel?” One voice demurred, raised hand and respectful title only forerunners for an obvious objection incoming.

“Yes? Sanchez, isn’t it? You’re not one of mine, I think.”

“No, sir, 55th -fighters.”

“Yes, well, welcome. What’s your question?”

“No offense sir but- what about the guards?” Sanchez asked.

“We don’t know yet,” Brady replied with typical candor, “I believe so far we’ve seen a mix here. I’m sure our friends can give us tips on who to watch out for.”

“No sir, sorry I meant-“ Sanchez kept her teeth clenched until her thoughts seemed to form better, “-you said no relations. What about the guards? No disrespect meant colonel and I don’t know about yours, but mine -they weren’t pulling out.”

“Mm.” Maureen thought that if Ida smashed her lips together any tighter they’d turn whiter than her skin, the bent aviators she had managed to preserve this entire time did a remarkable job of masking whatever feeling was stiffening her spine to the current degree, but all the same, her spine was stiff, “no offense taken, an excellent point. I’ll inquire about any possible…remedies. Anyone else?”

A multitude of hands shot up and Ida Brady scanned them with bewilderment until she realized her lapse in specificity. “Anyone else with questions, I meant! Saints alive. No? Good, let’s claim our bunks and see about a wash.”

After the dark interior of the building, being processed for hours, the hazy late afternoon light of outside glared painfully against Ida’s bloodshot eyes as she stepped out, leading the way down the three wooden steps to the muddy yard. Monochrome, this place, brown wooden buildings and brown earth and a muddy sky and brown flight jackets one after another.

And there in the midst of it, waiting for them with ever constant patience and thinned stateliness was Gale Cleven and his lost blue eyes and an alarmingly symmetrical set of facial scars.

“Major.” Ida felt her face soften into an odd expression she realized was likely that of relief. Cleven had that way about him, it was better suited to her preferences than Egan’s blustering warm hearted concern, Colonel Harding’s gruff joviality or her John’s perpetually intense concern. Her little brother was, oddly, nowhere to be seen now and that was a comfort in this wide open, highly observed space.

“Colonel.” Gale Cleven’s eyes weren’t a lost blue anymore but a pair of stormy seas and Ida steeled herself for pity. She found smoldering rage in his face instead. Another relief.

“How was it?” he was nodding to the command hut.

“Fine.” she assured.

He was searching for something in her face and Ida was sure it was easily found skin deep along her puffy, purpled left cheek, but if she had anything to do with her expression alone, he’d be kept guessing for ages. “Good.” he decided at last but his smile was tight, “Made John wait in the combine, he’s in there pacing like a madman. They make a note of who’s attached to whom, Colonel,” he explained, “a more discreet reunion seemed in order.”

“We’d appreciate all the direction you—“ Ida had begun but was cut short by Lt. Kendeigh who broke ranks from the processed group and came out of the hut behind Ida like a bat out of hell, running up to Cleven and tackling him in a hug, rather like a dog with their long lost master.

The Major’s lanky frame staggered under her surprise attack, perhaps more from shock and ill preparedness than poor rations and a weakened constitution. Or at least Ida, hoped that was the case.

Well, there went all intentions for discretion about partiality on their part, five seconds had gone by and Maureen still hadn’t let go, her valued cap about ready to knock off her head and his too. Seeing the gig was up, Cleven even belatedly brought an arm up to hug her shoulders, his pleased face bashfully pacifying her intensity. “If it isn’t my favorite bombardier.” Cleven mumbled, his lips failing not to tug upwards in the tiniest of smiles, and he gave her a pat on the back.

“Buck!” Smith was coming in hot behind Kendeigh and knocked Ida’s shoulder in her haste to get around her and join in. “Thank Jesus you’re here.” she grunted as she squeezed him and Kendeigh both, “I mean -we’re sorry you’re here but since we’re here-“

“Glad you’re here, too, Smith.” he assured her gently, another pat on another back and Ida watched Cleven’s composure began to flake as he took stock of their roughened appearances. “It’s gonna be ok now.” he offered, and coming from someone else that statement would’ve sounded a great deal less impressive than it did coming from him. It also sounded hollow without Bucky’s typical parroting of the upbeat sentiment. “Let’s get you girls sorted.” he nodded at Ida who fell in alongside him, if only to distance and displace Kendeigh and her over familiarity just a tad.

“What’s your Kommandant like?” Ida asked by way of conversation as Gale directed them in a trudge along the brown paths towards his specified hut.

“Think I know him as well as you.” Gale admitted, “Tried to stay low, been no reason for socializing. Wouldn’t advise a trip to the camp doctor though.” He added the last part after a beat.

“Why?”

“Your Johnny says he’s got an experimental mind.” Gale smiled wryly but there was a grieved look behind it that made Ida’s pulse pound in alarm, “If you go in with a cold, you might come out with a radioactive arm instead.”

“Noted.” Ida muttured with a shiver, wishing to god her jacket hadn’t been taken off her a couple stops ago, the sun was waning in the dull sky and the breeze was frigid without it. “Speaking of doctors,” she decided to go for it, “is Johnny -my John- is he alright? At the gate it was such a racket, was he…standing?”

Gale paused in his step up into the combine, brows knitted in surprise and she noticed along with him that their little march had drawn quite a little audience from the fellow inmates. Females in a Stalag -what a novelty. “Yeah, John’s fine. He’s fit.” Gale still had that quizzical look on his face.

Ida swallowed hard and gave him another curt nod, one she wanted to come across as grateful but wasn’t sure it did, her battered cheek was responding less and less to her mind’s commands. “Right. This us?”

“Yeah. Figured we’d try to keep as many close as possible.” He explained, “Welcome to paradise.”

“What did y’all name this shack?” Maureen asked him as she stepped over the threshold, it was dark inside and smelled of lumber and smoke.

“We haven’t.” Gale admitted, forlorn at the realization that things like that didn’t occur to people like him. If Bucky had been here, he’d have had it named in an hour, and something awful, too. Something that would make them all laugh.

“Damn oversight, Gingerale.” Maureen teased merrily but Cleven noticed the dimming light in her eyes as she took in the cramped, uninspired utility of the place. One wooden doorway after another.

“Talked it over with Colonel Clark during your processing,” Gale said, “decided it were best if we mingle you all among the men we know. Boys from your squadrons, friendly faces. A few of you in each room.”

“I call dibs on yours.” Maureen unabashedly grinned up at Cleven but Ida saw how a heartbroken look of protectiveness skittered across his features.

“Alright.” he muttered without a fight for once.

“Mm, Smith, Sanchez, Tong, you in here.” Ida decided and having snapped her fingers she was moving on to the next stuffy room. Asking Cleven at each about their current occupants, and with the precision of memory required of a woman who had to memorize her opponents on the promotional ladder, chose their new bunk mates accordingly.

“And where’s Johnny bunked?” she asked him in a low tone as she watched the next set settle in from the doorway.

“In with me, further down the hall, Demarco, Hambone, a few others.”

Ida seemed to hesitate as she eyed up an extra bunk in the current room that the last of her girls were settling into.

“Don’t be a stick, colonel,” Maureen spoke up gently, a surprising liberty even for her, “you need friends right now. Bunk with us. Everyone’s going to be fine. Can’t be all places at all times, ya know?”

Ida didn’t reply but after a moment she admitted, “I should go see John.”

Gale and Maureen exchanged a look and then moved in unison to catch up to her as Ida Brady walked, brisk as if she were back home at Thorpe and about to pick a fight with Jack Kidd, down the long hall to one of the last rooms. “In here?” she asked Gale, pointing at the closed door -they liked to keep it so for warmth and privacy, and to acclimate the guards to it being closed when the radio was out.

“Yeah that’s us.” Cleven replied, reaching out and snagging Maureen back a step as Ida turned the handle. “Let’s give ‘em a minute.” he suggested, referring to the Bradys.

He held her jacket sleeve for a brief moment before turning it to grab her hand, he’d missed those hands. To his horror their usual calloused elegance was a swollen paw of bruises. “The hell, Maureen?” he whispered in shock, turning it over to examine it, grip strong around her wrist before she could pull away. “Who did this?”

Maureen did her best to shrug, “Some bitch stood on them.” she said simply, and surrendered the other hand for a similar heartbroken inspection.

Kendeigh was indeed not as visibly marred as Ida Brady or a few of the others, but still, Gale kept turning her crushed hands over and over, recalling with vivid agony the way he’d admired them at all manner of work before. To hurt them that way, to restrain her so meanly- “Maureen,” she’d never heard his voice dip so low, and his eyes were simmering where they cataloged her hurts, “what’d they do to you?”

“What’d they do to your face?” she shot back, perhaps more perturbed by the immaculately symmetrical scars on his once porcelain face than her own condition. Women expected the treatment they’d gotten, in some twisted way, but this on the other hand, it disturbed her.

Gale looked taken aback by her question and quickly dropped her hand to touch his right cheek as if to remind himself the scar was obvious to everyone. “Flak.” he replied a beat too late.

“Awfully precise.” she snarked.

“I asked you first.”

“I told you, a bitch stood on them.”

“I’m your superior officer.”

“Who it looks like someone had some fun with,” Maureen snapped back, “who did this?”

“What happened to you?” He hit right back but his voice quavered.

“I’m fine now. I wanna go see the boys. Come on.”

“Just- give them another minute.” Gale insisted, pulling her back away from the doorway again, “It’s a lot.” He reminded, “For a brother to see his sister like -that.”

Maureen couldn’t argue with that, besides Gale looked so sad and more fragile than she’d ever seen him, and the gentle hold he had on her jacket was as needy and scared as a child’s. “I’m glad we’re in this together.” she whispered.

“Me too.” he admitted, guilty and sad over how true that was before letting her press her lips to his.

Ida Brady didn’t know what she expected when she opened the door, not much she supposed, just a living brother with any luck. It was a decently tidy room, plates stacked on a rough hewn board at the far end, eight bunks lining the walls, stacked three tall. A table was in the middle and there sat dear old Crank and Hambone too, Murph with Benny. A card game was ongoing.

They looked so fine, quite normal, all in all.

All motion in the small room stopped upon her entrance. Cards were dropped and cigarettes forgotten in open mouthed shock.

“Holy shit -colonel?” Demarco didn’t have a dishonest bone in his body, and his disbelieving horror over her appearance came through loud and clear in his greeting. She hadn’t seen him at the gate.

The same for Hambone’s face, one that had never bothered to be discreet in pleasant circumstances, much less in shocking ones like seeing a notorious superior officer come in looking about as battered as a body could get -although his torn cheek was one to talk. Crank recovered first, in his mild, stammering sort of way, glancing at the lean figure who still stood looking out the lone window.

“Well, if it isn’t Ain’t Pretty Brady.” Crank clapped uneasily, summoning her nickname from basic just to cut the tension, it served to startle John.

He turned from the window abruptly, blank faced and unblinking as he realized the sister he had been watching for had already arrived. If their ole nan from the motherland had suddenly materialized before him he could have hardly looked more haunted or aghast, wide fringed fox eyes and that straight fold of a mouth -always so very held together, her little brother. Even after his third belly landing.

But those startled unblinking eyes...

Ida wanted to tell him to blink, that it was all alright now, that they were both alive and that it was good enough, it had to be. But she seemed to have fully lost all power over her throbbing cheek at last, she could feel her lips move in a motion she realized with supreme panic was likely a wobble of emotion. She ripped her aviators off, as if seeing her eyes might help his to come alive.

“John John?” she croaked in greeting, oblivious of the childish endearment tumbling off her lips in a room full of soldiers. If it were something their family was in the habit of doing, Ida Brady might have rushed him like Maureen did her pilot, or held out her own hand to be held, asked for a gesture from him -after what she’d gone through, surely it couldn’t have been weakness to want a clap on the shoulder, a flick to the bicep, a little “well done” for staying alive.

But she just stood there and watched him clock her shame. She could feel her swollen lip splitting in real time as the swelling and incessant trembling tore the taut skin apart, they’d passed around a single canteen in processing and it wasn’t enough, the walls of her throat felt collapsed together. Maybe she should have asked for a mirror first, maybe Cleven or Kendeigh or Smith should have told her she’d bring a whole room to a frozen standstill by her looks alone. They’d seen her at the gate -were these meager lightbulbs really so much more illuminating?

“Eye-eye.” Johnny let it out in a breathy rush as if he’d suddenly come to, and then he was in front of her, hands cradling the sides of her neck, thumbs hooked gently under her bruised jaw. A calloused pad swiped away the ticklish trickle of blood sliding the crease of her mouth.

Eye eye -his onetime baby babble for Ida, and she’d never let him forget it.

She could have wept at the useless sentimentality of it, of the gentle familiarity of familial hands, at the seething loyalty storming across his face.

“The fuck did they do?” he articulated at last, voice gravelly as shit but also reminiscent of the squeaky olden days when his castrato role suddenly no longer served one Sunday in choir.

“You’ve got legs.” she answered instead, sounding maniacal in her happiness.

He looked at her like she’d gone fully crazy as well as beat, “Yeah? Yeah I do.”

“They said, they said you didn’t.” she chuckled, a bizarre merriment trying to take hold in her relief, “During interrogation, that bespectacled cunt told me you had your legs crushed when you crashed.”

“No? No- no I jumped.” He insisted, then let go of her face to step back and gesture to two fit legs, as long and lanky as she remembered, as long and lanky as her own. “I jumped, I’m fine. They told you that?”

“Yeah.” Ida said, “Told me the longer I didn’t comply the longer you were without medical attention. I -I’ve been so…uneasy…about you.”

“I’m fine.” He repeated, hands back on her shoulders and she was grateful for it despite the bruises he was gripping, grateful for the way he kept touching her like he was going to hold her together with his own two hands, same blood, same flesh, same memories, maybe whatever she’d lost he could supply back like a blood donation. “Those sons of bitches.” he cursed them.

“Plasma for planes.” she agreed.

He kept looking at her, at her cheek and at her ragged hair and at the missing buttons, “You didn’t tell them anything did you?” he suddenly asked, wide eyed. “You know i’d rather die than have you tell.”

Ida scoffed, and gave him a grin, the best one she could manage with her cheek and split lip, “What do you take me for, Johnny?”

“A cold hearted bitch, I hope.” he returned the small smile but his voice cracked, still that hint of something long gone and juvenile.

“That’s what their Lieutenant called me.” Ida confirmed, a little proud, and sensing a renewal of his inquiries, Ida chose to take the offensive and call out for a conspicuously absent Kendeigh, “Candy! Didn’t you want to tell Johnny about your charming admirer? The Lieutenant?”

Kendeigh came round the doorway hastily, her lips puffy and cheeks oddly red. Cleven followed after and matched her, and his blush did nothing but highlight those scars of his. “Brady.” Maureen greeted, boldly hugging Ida’s very stiff brother without care —due to his red cheeks and rigid shoulders Ida concluded Cleven had given his own inner-relations talk to the men—, “Yes, I wanted to -oh hello Crank, Benny you son of gun- wanted to tell y'all about my ticket outta here -hell Hambone, how’d you manage to get uglier? -see my integrator, he found me fairly fetching. I think one of these days he’s gonna roll up in his shiny car and take me away from here and you’re all gonna wish you’d taken time to learn a little know-how about Alligators and their hibernation tactics in the winter. He was enthralled.”

There was an awkward silence hanging in the room, Crank grimaced a smile out of sheer generosity of heart and Benny Demarco still sat with his cigarette neglected on his open lip. Cleven, used to her preening brazness kept a tight lip, though a thousand questions seemed to swirl in his eyes.

“He the one who stood on your hands?” John Brady asked her without hesitancy.

Maureen whirled round then, comedy hour over and an angry flush creeping up her neck at his directness. “No.” she snapped. “Can’t some of them be alright?”

“A German’s a German.” he countered.

“There’s Fitzs and then there’s Johanns.” she disagreed nebulously and only Ida got her reference.

“And a shower is a shower,” Ida butted in before this became an experiment in an immovable object meeting an unstoppable force “which we need, badly. We’re…filthy.”

“We’ve got working sinks, trough sinks.” Cleven clarified with an apologetic look as if it were his fault the showers only ran once a week and poorly at that, and the water they had was frigid already in autumn.

“Water is water.” Ida reasoned in return, wondering when Johnny was going to finally let go of her arm.

“We’ll clear it out for ya.” Cleven said.

“And we’ll guard the entrance.” John added emphatically.

“Thanks.” Ida muttured, “Some of us could use to mend our uniforms.” she added, refusing to blanch at the subtle inventory of her jagged tears and crusted blood being made by every man in the room.

Maureen at least had her jacket intact. Her cap, too.

“Here, you can have my trousers while I stitch yours.” her John decided and was unbuckling his belt before she even registered the hand gone from her shoulder.

“What?” Ida balked, “You’re going to go ‘round in your skivvies?”

“Not as uncommon around here as you’d think, Ida.” Gale said, a small smile on his face. “I’m afraid order and decorum has gone to shit without you.”

“Well I’m here now.” she replied sternly but didn’t stop Johnny as he stripped.

“And so am I.” Kendeigh grinned and all Ida could do was to bless the saints for having let only one terror into the camp, were Bucky Egan to be here too, things would become intolerably lax. As soon as she thought it she repented it, sending up a prayer for the poor, absent bastard.

“Say Benny, you’re shorter, can I have your pants?” Maureen pleaded.

“Why mine?” Demarco protested, only offended at the height implication.

“Because Cleven’s too tall and I’ve already been in his pants.”

“Maureen!”

“Ida, order somebody to give me their pants.”

“You can have mine.” Crank offered kindly, and then stood up and bashfully began to unlayer. It left him in skivvies, a snuggly sweater and his flight jacket.

“It’s a good look, Crank,” Maureen grinned at the finished product as he handed the trousers over. “I’m seeing you in a different light.”

“Maureen!”

“Just sayin-“

“Take the pants with you to the washroom!” Brady interjected desperately as Maureen looked ready to strip right here and now. “Jesus, Kendeigh.”

“Touchy, touchy.” Maureen ribbed him, out for blood in her tired state and if she couldn’t have that of the Germans she would of her friends’.

“Alright let’s - let’s settle down.” Gale implored, a tired expression firmly etched onto his face and Ida herself considered giving up on the wash altogether and tumbling into the available bunk to court the oblivion of sleep. Were it only blood and dirt she just might, her usual tidiness be damned.

As it was -it was, there was…the filth was so much worse.

And if Ida thought on it too long she’d go mad and want to pour boiling lye on herself to wash herself clean and to kill the shame of it. She’d have to scrub the pants before she gave them to Johnny to be mended, it was bad enough for a brother to see the blood and busted seams.

“Yes, settle down for God’s sake.” she echoed Cleven, and something about her hoarse voice compelled Maureen to temper herself more than any direct order could. “A wash, come on, let’s get the girls. Oh and one more thing, Cleven-“ Ida turned to Gale and found him alert, eager to help. She was afraid she was only setting him up for failure but she had to make an effort to find those “remedies” she’d promised Sanchez. “There any lemons around?”

The incredulous look on his face suggested he thought she knew better, but he was ever polite in his reply, “No, colonel. No lemons.”

“Mm. Nutmeg?” she tried to recall each wicked trick she’d heard condemned when a girl got herself in the family way without the needed family in place.

“No, no nutmeg.”

“Mm.”

“Nothing but potatoes and cigarettes, ma’am. Do you- why?” he asked.

“Nothing.” she assured, “Just, a hot toddy sounds good right about now. You know?”

“Uh,” he floundered, half in suspicion and half in genuine confusion, “never had one.”

“Well then,” she grinned as she passed him, “that’s something to add to our to-do list for when this is all over. Jameson, though, none of that Kentucky stuff.”

“Yes ma’am.” his tone was vacant, smiling concern brittle, “You uh, you alright, Colonel?”

Ida gave him a withering look and then Gale too, had cause to be repentant.

“Come on Kendeigh, let's get the rest.” Ida gestured as she followed Gale back into the hall, aware of Johnny’s eyes still on her, still taking stock, “They better not be in bunks without a wash. Come on, showers, everyone! Out, come on out. You can sleep afterwards. Out! Would one of you be so kind as to wake us up in time for roll call?” she inquired of the male officers straggling behind her in the hall.

“Course! Yeah, for sure.” about five offers went up.

“You wake Me up.” she clarified coming to a full stop, wary of the enthusiasm, “I’ll wake up the rest.”

“I’ll get you up.” Her John said.

He’d probably sit and watch her sleep, too, needle and torn pants in hand, like a creepy little owl but that was one of those things she figured make or break a family, you either find it endearing you have a brother who rarely blinks or you go mad. Today, after all of it, she didn’t mind having a guardian Angel. Or a watchdog. Speaking of-

“Hey,” she asked him, “you two flew out together, where’s Bucky?”

But no one had an answer for that, not even Little John.

💋Hope you enjoyed AND REMEMBER -prompts are now open.

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[nnaminxz]

“𝕻𝖗𝖊𝖙𝖙𝖞 𝕲𝖎𝖗𝖑𝖘 𝕯𝖔𝖓’𝖙 𝕮𝖗𝖞“

↳ 𝔰𝔲𝔤𝔲𝔯𝔲 𝔤𝔢𝔱𝔬

⤑ 𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: smut & angst

⤑ 𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: if the saying is “misery loves company” why isn’t Suguru happy right now?

⤑ 𝔱𝔞𝔤𝔰: Gojo Satoru slander I’m sorry but I had too, I love him very much tho, sad feelings, sad reader, suguru is kind of ass too, maybe a lil ooc but it’s fanfic so don’t attack me, vaginal sex, riding, the ending may be dumb but it’s whatever, minors dni

⤑ 𝔞𝔲𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔯𝔰 𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: I wrote this for an another fandom a WHILE ago and always wanted to redo it so I thought why not redo it for my first jjk fic. I hope you guys enjoy this is my first time posting for this fandom so I’m vv nervous/excited. Pls be kind

Suguru always thought this would make him happy.

Seeing you around campus with Satoru made him angry enough, so he just knew that when the inevitable happened and Satoru started acting like well—Satoru again the sight was guaranteed to bring much happiness to his heart.

He knew it was sick, that he wanted to see whatever you and Satoru had going on fail but Suguru couldn't help it.

None of it mattered though because it didn’t happen.

Suguru sat in the same place for two hours watching the two of you—waiting for the feeling of bitter happiness to fill his bones but it never came.

In fact, it was the exact opposite.

Watching you fight to get Satoru’s attention made him sad. Seeing how no matter what you did he would rather pay more attention to everyone else made Suguru angry. And watching you finally leave the room and the other boy not even bat an eye made him furious.

If he was truly surprised or even thought the other boy would care, Suguru would’ve went over to him and said something but it wasn’t worth it. Satoru was just like him.

An idiot.

A dumbass.

They couldn’t tell when they had a good thing even if it’d slapped them across the face.

“Where you going?” Haibara questions as Suguru stands to his feet.

“Need a smoke,”

“Ah,” The other boy nodded his head. “Are you having fun?”

Suguru decides to lie again. The happiness on his friends face to pure to ruin with his sour mood.

“I told you coming out tonight would be a good idea.”

“Yeah,” Suguru fakes a grin. “I’ll be back.” He took the pack of cigarettes out his pocket waving them before walking away.

Suguru easily maneuvers his way through the thick crowd until he was standing on the back porch. The screen door shut with a thud causing you to swiftly snap around. There was a hopeful and expectant look on your face but when you saw it was him all that fell as you turned back around.

“Well, hello to you too,” Suguru jokes trying to hide the actual physical pain he was feeling in his heart.

That used to be him you were so eager to see.

“What do you want?” You huffed softly.

“Needed a smoke.”

The way you turned to look at him with such concern almost made Suguru laugh. Here you were angry at him, going through your own shit, and still somehow harbored enough care to be concerned with his health.

“I though you quit?”

Suguru plops down next to you pulling the carton out his pocket flipping the cap open. “I did.” He says showing you the empty pack..

“You carry around an empty pack?”

“It’s a good way for me to make an exit,”

You left out a long sigh. “I looked that pitiful huh?”

“You don’t look pitiful. He just looks stupid.”

Though you didn’t say anything back you didn’t need to for Suguru to already know what you were thinking. He knew you like the back of his hand and no doubt you were beating yourself up, angry with yourself when in reality you should’ve been focused on the one who deserved it.

“I’m so stupid,” You whisper and its so low that it Suguru wasn’t already so hyper-focused on your very existence he would’ve probably missed it.

“No, you’re not.”

“You told me he was like this.”

“People told you about me and you still gave me a chance,”

“So I am stupid.”

“You’re trusting,” Suguru counters. “You give people the benefit of the doubt.”

“why is it that trusting people always end up looking stupid?”

“because others take advantage of it.”

Something he knew all to well.

You both fall silent again. The only noise filling the space are the sounds of nature and the muffled thumping music that escaped the noisy house. Suguru looks over at you wishing there was something he could to do. Something he could say. Seeing you like this hurt him.

He hated seeing you cry.

He felt like dying when you were upset.

But it also hurt to see you happy so Suguru wasn’t exactly sure what he wanted.

All this shit was so weird. An uncharted territory before you came along.

Every time the screen door would creak open you’d twist around to see if it was him and every time you ended up turning back around in disappointment. As your disappointment grew, so did Suguru’s anger.

You only deserved the best things in life. None of this push and pull, ‘I’m here but around others I’m not’ bullshit.

Suguru was such a hypocrite.

Here he was furious with Satoru when he used to just as much of an asshole to you as well. He too would push and pull right until he pushed you away completely.

“I’m sorry,” He quietly apologizes. If he’d just gotten his act together sooner there would be no you and Satoru. You wouldn’t be sad and he would still have you.

You shake your head softly shushing him. “Not right now please,” You say. “Can you take me home? I just really want to go back home.”

Without saying anything else Suguru nodded. As both of  you were walking to his car you passed a big window. Sadly it was a clear shot to Satoru who now had another girl seated next to him in your place.

Not only had he not noticed your absence but that easily he’d replaced you.

“He’s such a fucking ass.”

“Yeah,” You agree. “Let’s just go,”

Suguru had evert urge to go in there and go off but when he looked back over you were already halfway to his car so he kept it moving. Satoru wasn’t worth it anyway. He was just another dick who thought way too much of himself.

Satoru didn’t deserve you.

Neither did Suguru.

One in the car Suguru sent Haibara a quick message saying he was going home before shifting the car into gear.

As expected the drive was silent. There wasn’t much to say. As much as Suguru wanted to comfort you he didn’t know what to do even if he did you probably wouldn’t want to hear it from him. Why would you?

Suguru knew every route to and from your apartment but decided to take the longest one. If you noticed you didn’t say anything. All you did was keep quiet as you looked out the window.

You stayed that way until he pulled up to you complex. Before getting out of the car you whisper as soft thank you and force a smile.

“yeah, no problem,” Suguru murmurs.

He’s about to pull away when out the corner of his eye he spots your small tube of lip gloss sitting in his cup holder. You had a million of them and even thought you probably wouldn’t even realize this one was missing Suguru still found himself on a journey to your front door.

Who know this could’ve been your favorite one.

The one in the pink tube was your favorite actually.

But Suguru already knew that.

“You left this,” Suguru says once you open the door.

“Thanks,” You mutter grabbing it from his hand. “I have a million in this flavor.”

“I know.”

For the first time tonight a genuine smile filled your lips. It was small and not the one he was used to seeing but for right now it would do. It was better than nothing.

Though your eyes were sad and bloodshot you were still as beautiful as ever to him.

“Please don’t cry over him. He doesn’t deserve your tears.”

“I just want something real,” You say in a small voice your arms wrapping around your body.

“What we had was real.”

“You were just like him.”

“I know.”

“I’m sorry,” Suguru adds, his voice wavering as he tries to get out the words. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“I know,” you say this time.

Suguru is walking away when you call out his name. As soon as he turns back around your lips are on his. He’s shocked for a moment, standing there with wide eyes, but quickly he fall back into your old routine. His heart is pounding so hard against his chest and Suguru wonder if you could feel it as well.

With every kiss he pulls you closer to him. It’s been months since he’d last had you this close and Suguru didn’t want it to end any time soon. He missed this, the soft breaths that escape you, the fruity taste of your lip gloss, the way your hands cradle his face.

Slowly your hands roam from his face to his jacket and then finally when they land on his belt Suguru forces himself to pull away.

Suguru lets out a sigh resting his forehead against yours. “We can’t.” He mutters.

He wanted you but not this way. Not when you were like this.

“Why?”

“You’re….” his voice trails off.

“I’m sober,”

“You’re sad.” He counters.

You give him a shrug. “ I want this. I need this.”

Suguru knows what this was. A rebound fuck. Simply a way for you to get back at Satoru in your mind but couldn’t bring himself to care as he kisses you again. He knows this was going to hurt in the morning but he’d deal with that when it came.

A satisfied moan leaves your lips. “Please,” You beg and Suguru nods, not even needing to know what exactly you were asking for because he already was prepared to give you everything.

Reaching behind him Suguru pushed the front door closed. “Where?” Without saying anything you guided him both over to the couch lightly pushing him down before climbing on top.

You pulled off your dress and without a second thought, Suguru hands find their way to your breast, lifting the mounds out of the cups. His tongue gently swipes over both nipples before picking one to suck on while he twisted the other between his fingers.

“Fuck,” Soft moans escape your plump lips as you arch further into him. “It’s always about him.”

Suguru pulls away for a brief moment and shushes you before taking in the other nipple. He didn’t want to hear about you and Satoru. The thoughts tortured him enough. 

It did bring him a sick satisfaction to know that Satoru was a lazy lover.

“M’sorry,”

“Don’t be. This is just about us right now.”

You nod, pressing your fingers underneath Suguru’s chin as lift up his head so you could kiss him again. Suguru’s hands were everywhere. From your ass to your stomach, your thighs, he couldn’t get enough.

“Touch me,” You command.

Suguru happily listens, his fingers easily finding their way into your panties. You were already so wet. The juices soaking him with just a few movements. His fingers dances across your clit pulling airy groans from your mouth. To him you look so beautiful, your head tossed back, eyes fluttering, as your hips rocks into his fingers.

“Need you in me.”

“Wanna taste you.”

You shake your head, big glossy needy eyes focused on him. “Next time maybe.”

His heart jumps at the words ‘next time’. Suguru really hopes there is a next time. Not even for the sex. He just wanted you.

You lift up allowing Suguru the room to pull his pants down. After pulling your own panties to the side you grab his cock and align it before sinking down.

Groans leave both of your mouths and before Suguru can even collect his thoughts you began to bounce up and down. Suguru isn’t even sure were to focus. Your bouncing breast, the perfect contortions of your face, or the lewd scene between your legs.

He leans forward and takes your nipple into his mouth again. You felt so good. So wet. So warm. The tight grip on his hair only sending more pleasure through his body while you alternate between bouncing and grinding. Your eyes were closed and you weren’t focused on anything but yourself.

You were using him but none of that mattered.

“Suguru,” you whine, finally looking at him. “feels so good. It feels so good.”

“Only ever want to make you feel good y/n,”

 Suguru says it so quietly that he wasn’t even sure you’d heard or if you did you’d understood what exactly he meant but when your eyes began to water again Suguru knew you had.

You hide your face into the crook of his neck, wrapping your arms around him. When your hips began to falter in pace Suguru knows your close. Once your pussy tightens and your legs begin to shake, Suguru lets himself fall apart too.

You both stay like that. Breathing labored wrapped in each other's arms not saying anything. You stay that way until he hears your little sniffles and feels the tears falling onto his shoulder.

“Don’t cry. Pretty girls don’t cry.”

“Then stop making me.”

[sinfulseashell]

For Yandere Bonten

What would you do if your S/O really likes to bake and asked you if she can bake a cake for you?

Y!Mikey: For a moment the male stays silent, not sure why he keeps coming to these…”interviews” yet thinking about the times he has watched his darling bake and how happy they looked to give him a treat made his cold heart feel warm. The male slowly stands while looking back at the interviewer, “I’ll be back…don’t come looking for me…” he spoke with a monotoned voice clearly eyeing Sanzu as he left.

Y!Kakucho: “It’s ok, you didn’t upset him. He is going to find his darling so they can make him some Taiyaki.”

Y!Sanzu: “We all knew that! Dumbass!” The pinkette hissed while slouching in his chair. “Anyways. It would be cute, but my darling doesn’t really like to bake so I guess this question wouldn’t necessarily be for me?”

Y!Koko: The male sighs while pinching the bridge of his nose, “For fucks sake just answer the goddamn question!”

Y!Sanzu: “Alright! Geez…I would find it very cute, but I can’t guarantee that things won’t get a little messy. Hehe…if you know what I mean.”

Y!Rin: “We didn’t need to know that…”

Y!Sanzu: “What! A man can’t get excited if their darling does something cute for them?”

Y!Takeomi: “I don’t think that’s what they meant…” The older male stares at his brother before being tapped on the shoulder by one of the employees. “That’s how you’re supposed to answer the question?! Uh…ok…” He shakes his head and looks at the interviewer. “Look I’m not going to say I…*clears throat* make my darling see stars just because they offer me a gift. I would think it’s a nice gesture, would they get a reward? Well of course my little one is always rewarded for being nice.” He smirks.

Y!Sanzu: Glares at the male in disgust, “And you talk about me…funny how you guys think I’m a monster yet you have this bastard over here barfing up fucking rainbows and bullshit.”

Y!Koko: “Alright! We promised there would be no fighting this time! So shut the fuck up and just listen…or so help me I will put tape on your mouth.” Koko fixes his shirt and sits back calmly. “Personally I don’t think that would be so much as sex worthy, but I will be happy to know my darling thought about me so it’s plain and simple.” He shrugs.

Y!Ran: “Wow, you’re darling must be very lucky to have you.” He cooed.

Y!Koko: Clear annoyance grazed his features as he looked over at the eldest Haitani, “Ran…you better watch it…” he hissed. “Or I’ll cut your funds and give that to my darling…you rat.”

Y!Ran: “Why are you so mean…” he pouted playfully.

Y!Rin: He stifles his laugh, clearing his throat as he turned to look at the interviewer, “It’s fine I guess. I mean all I can do is eat it so it’s not like the gift will last long. It would probably be better if they gifted me something more…useful.”

Y!Ran: A sharp gasp emitted from him, lavender eyes darting to his brother. “RIN! I raised you better than that! You always accept gifts from your darling with love.” He cooed. “That way they will be more willing to give you better gifts.” He hummed.

Y!Mochi: “Wait…that’s not right. You’re supposed to love your darling no matter what they give. I mean for me that would be something special, and I would always cherish them and their treats.” The larger male smile brightly. “It’s about loving them and cherishing them…I feel you may have lost your way, Haitani.”

Y!Ran: “Oh you big sweetheart. Of course your tiny little brain couldn’t comprehend that question. It’s fine darling, just stick to being the big muscle you are.” He pats the males thigh lightly with a smug smile.

Y!Kakucho: “Actually I agree with Mochi. It’s seems that some of you have forgotten why you even have your darling in the first place. You obsessed over them because they were perfect, and now that you have them…it’s like you’re not trying to keep them by your side. Without violence or threats.” He paused for a moment while shaking his head. “If you keep this up they will eventually stop loving you.”

Y!Sanzu: “God I hate you so damn much…”

[archiveikemen]

『 Dark If 』 Story Event: Prologue

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection. I do not own any of the original content. Please support CYBIRD by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.

❥･• Warnings and FAQ

London, the capital of England, prospered and thrived under the reign of Her Majesty Queen Victoria.

I was an ordinary person working as a postwoman in this city.

And I was having a little difficulty saving enough money to buy tickets to a play I wanted to watch.

(Nice, I’m done with all my deliveries for the day.)

(If I could do a little more work, I’d be able to afford tickets for that play…)

…

Kate: I’m back.

Chief: Kate! Perfect timing… wait no, the streets can be dangerous at night…

Kate: What’s the matter?

Co-Worker: You see, we’re a little short staffed at the moment, so there's no one to do the night deliveries.

(That’s IT!)

Kate: Please let me handle them.

…

Taking the additional deliveries with me, I walked through a district of townhouses lit by gas lamps along the street.

(The last letter is for the shop manager of a bookstore.)

(“Kingsley Books”... oh, here it is!)

…

Kate: Excuse me, I’m from the post office. Is the manager in…?

(There’s no one here. Looks like I’ll just have to come back again tomorrow— hm? What’s this?)

I bent down and picked up a book that was laying at my feet.

As if drawn to it by some mysterious force, I opened the book that had no title on it.

Kate: …!

A gust of wind swirled around me, and I was blinded by a bright beam of light that enveloped me—

Long-Haired Man: Welcome to the twisted fairytale world…

Long-Haired Man: We have a guest~ yay~

When my vision cleared up, I saw a beautiful man with long hair standing in wait for me.

Kate: W-Where is this… I… I was in a bookstore just a moment ago, and then…

I didn't know where I was, nor did I know the person standing before me.

All I knew was that it wasn't the bookstore, and that I still had work to do.

Kate: Um, I’m in the midst of making a delivery, so I’d like to return to Kingsley Books.

Long-Haired Man: That'll be very difficult, I’m afraid.

Kate: Huh?

Long-Haired Man: Truth is, I don't know how to send you back to where you came from.

Amidst my confusion, the man who introduced himself as Victor calmly explained the situation with a reassuring smile.

The place I was currently in was— somewhere in between the fairytale world and the world I lived in.

Kate: … The fairytale world.

Victor: Do you remember being brought here by a book without a title?

Kate: I do. Does this mean that I’m now inside the world in that book?

Victor: Correct. Very quick and clever of you.

(My level of adaptability as a result of making mail deliveries is useful in this kind of situation.)

Kate: But, Victor… you mentioned a ‘twisted fairytale world’ earlier.

Victor: Alice in Wonderland, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty.

Victor: Most fairytales follow a more or less similar kind of plotline that generally leads to a happy ending.

Victor: However, in this world, the stories deviate from their “original” plots, resulting in chaos. Their endings are far from happy.

Kate: … Why is this so?

Victor: That’s because… there’s something missing from each fairytale.

Kate: … Something missing? And what may that be?

Victor: I don't know what that is myself.

Victor: I believe that is your purpose here; you were brought into this world to look for that missing piece.

(In other words…)

Kate: If I find the missing piece, it will fix the twist in this fairytale world and give the stories a happy ending.

Kate: Then my job here will be done and—

Victor: You’ll be able to return to your world, perhaps.

(That seems to be the only way now. I don't have any other options.)

(I’ll find what’s missing, fix the twist in the plotline, and guide the stories to a happy ending.)

And then I’ll return to my world and continue making deliveries.

Once I made my decision, I heard a bell in the distance.

Victor: Oh, looks like it’s about time to wake up.

Victor: May you have a happy ending, Miss Kate.

Victor: — Into the twisted fairytale world you go.

[dark-frosted-heart]

The Fairytale Keeper's Final Assessment - Roger (Part 2)

This is the 1st anniversary event and is in his POV.

As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this

Roger: You need a beer after working up a good sweat. Here, cheers.

Kate: A tavern…always a tavern…

Roger: What’s up, not in the mood to drink?

Kate: Now, I was feeling thirsty and I like this tavern because it’s comfy. However…I’d like more of…Nevermind.

Owner: Yo, Kate. You’re letting this guy lead you around again? You never learn, do you?

The owner held out a small dish to Kate.

Owner: I want you to try some of this dried fruit. Roger’s the type to say salting the meat will make it taste good so he’s useless.

Kate: I get it. To Roger, nutrition’s all that matters.

Roger: Hm…?

Kate was laughing as she enjoyed her conversation with the owner.

(You’ve grown used to it. Both being with me and being in this type of environment)

Shortly after meeting, Kate and I had spent a whole day together.

At the time, I dared Kate to join me on a brutal mission and even shot a man down before her eyes.

Kate’s been earnest since the moment I met her and gives 100% in everything.

That way of life’s a virtue.

However, in darkness, it’s a disadvantage.

(I know that the harder and more sincere you try, the faster your life will be destroyed)

(That’s why I told Kate that day…)

(“It’s wise to keep your distance if you want to live”)

(I always thought that Kate would go back to her old life while keeping her distance)

(Even now, Kate is with me)

Kate: Roger, hey, Roger.

Roger: Hm…?! Mmm.

When I turned my head to look at her, she shoved dried fruit into my mouth.

Kate: Hehe, that’s for always bullying me.

Roger: Oh? YOu’re learning how to deal with me. Howeverー

I pinched Kate’s cheek and examined her.

Roger: I'm the kind of person who, when someone treats me badly, I want to treat them even worse. Remember that.

Kate: Got eet.

Kate rubbed her cheek and happiness returned to her voice.

Kate: Can I take you somewhere this time, Roger?

Roger: Next I was going to take you to the black market where drugs are secretly being sold.

Kate: I’ll pass on that today!

--

Kate took me to a lovely little cafe on a street corner.

Kate: I wanted to visit a place like this at least once with you.

Roger: Oh, even just one drink’s elaborately made. Do they have a bigger size?

Kate: Hehe, I thought so…

Roger: Hm?

Kate: You may be inconsiderate but you won’t turn a person down.

Roger: I don’t know if I’m supposed to feel insulted or flattered.

Kate: A compliment, more or less.

As I was having the coffee and lovely little pastry Kate ordered for me…

Something cold fell on my cheek.

Roger and Kate: Ah…

When I looked up, pure white snowflakes danced in the clear sky.

Kate: Snow…At this time of the year?

Roger: Diamond dust*

Kate: Diamond dust?

Roger: A few days ago, we had some out of season snow. The snow that collected on the building’s now being blown down by the wind.

Kate: Oh, how fascinating. …It’s beautiful, isn’t it?

Kate murmured as she stared at the snow falling like petals.

Kate: There’s something I once heard. That people make up to 35,000 decisions a day. If one of them had been different, we wouldn’t be seeing this today.

As Kate says, life’s made up of countless choices.

(When the day ends, I’ll reveal the fairytale keeper agreement to Kate and leave the choice to her)

(I don’t think I should be involved)

(Kate decides what she wants to do with her life)

(...But)

Kate’s gaze, which was focused on the snow, suddenly turned to me.

Kate: I’m glad I got to meet you Roger through a miraculous coincidence.

(Ah, I see)

(Not immediately giving her the choice of whether or not to continue as a fairytale keeper)

(Not telling her that the moment when we’ll have to part ways is coming)

One unconscious thought assembles into a big motive.

(I still want to be with the little lady, don't I?)

Just as the falling snow reminds me to look up at the sky, Kate’s words remind me of how I feel.

Feelings are too simple to ignore.

Roger: Pfft, haha…

Kate: Huh, what’s wrong?

Roger: It’s nothing.

Hey, Kate. There’s one more place I’d like to go.

–

Roger: Oh, so this is where you used to live.

Kate: Yes. Looks like Victor’s still paying the rent. For when I come back one day.

Kate surveyed the place in nostalgia.

She muttered something before I could show her the agreement form.

Kate: If my time as a fairytale keeper’s coming to an end, then we’ll have to part ways.

Roger: Kate, here.

Kate: A letter of agreement…to continue as a fairy tale keeper?

Kate blinked as I told her everything.

She then nodded once, as if understanding everything.

Roger: Originally, I’m the one that’s supposed to sign it. But I think the choice should be yours, Kate.

Kate: I knew that you, who told me that I should “think for myself”, would say something like that.

Roger: The choice is yours, but let me tell you how I feel first.

I closed the gap between us and examined her expression.

And then I placed a hand on her head.

Roger: Kate, I’d die of boredom without you. I’d miss you. So stay as a fairytale keeper.

Kate: Roger…

Roger: So, what are you going to do, Kate? Continue being a fairytale keeper? Or are you going to say farewell-to me.

*He says 風花 which is “snow on a clear day” but that felt weird to use in this exchange. Though I don’t know if diamond dust is the right term to use either given where the snow came from.

[tojikai]

I KNEW IT! the way toji went about this whole thing was so fucking heartwarming (and heartbreaking for him). not once did he accuse either Satoru or Y/N, or blame them for the way things are.

toji sneakily did a little snooping and he saw that both Y/N and Satoru genuinely wished for their family to be reunited. they still loved each other when shit hit the fan and now that satoru’s parasite of a mother is gone and satoru has finally taken his blindfold off (😭), he knows that satoru can and will be a better man and father for y/n and yui.

this ends in heartbreak for toji, but i know how important family is to him. he’d love for mamaguro to still be around and id like to think he would be at peace knowing that at least one of them can be a united family 😭

and i while i did suspect Y/N still had strong feelings for satoru, it was nice to see it written out for us as readers. the way her heart reacts to the things Satoru does for her and Yui isn’t something that’s born out of responsibility, it’s love 😭 we saw satoru’s growth throughout the story, now let’s see if Y/N becomes proactive and finally speaks her mind to the people she cares about. i’m rooting for her no matter what 🥹

now, just because toji and y/n may break up doesn’t necessarily mean her and Satoru are going to try again immediately (although i’d be lying if i said i didn’t want them together again). but the growth that the two of them have gone through apart will 100% make them stronger together if they do decide to try again. i know for sure nothing will ever split them up 🥹

i don’t know how this ends (naomi and satoru’s mom rotting away on a deserted island hopefully 🤞🏽 ) but i do know that i’ve loved every moment of this. i’m hoping we get a happy ending bc im still hurting over the bittersweet one of Permanent Mark, but i’ll be happy no matter what you decide 🥰

P.S - i wonder if Satoru will ever tell Y/N exactly what happened with him and his mom/Naomi. and what Y/N will think or say 😕 hoping that he’s slowly healing from all that

THANK YOU FOR WRITING KAI, I hope life is treating you well and that you’re healthy. ilysm and I’ll see you for the final chapter 🥹

i laughed so hard at that "blindfold" part😭😭😭😭😭 but yeah, IF yn and toji really breaks up, there's no guarantee how her rs with satoru'd be like, we don't even know if they'll get back together. as for the thing that happened to satoru, he cant really tell yn abt it yet. it's still a very heavy topic to him, esp w how his mother's involve, it's hard for him to even think about :(( anw how have u been?? i hope you're well ~ thank you sooo much for your support<33

[ofmermaidstories]

I’m pretty sure I got blocked by a blog bc I’m a silent reader and don’t really interact with fandom writers. Like I went to follow her blog and like 10 mins later she blocked me from her personal blog and the writing blog I originally tried to follow, this is despite having my 21+ age in my bio 😭. Ngl I kinda fill hurt and sad, sorry if I’m bothering you but I really wanted to share this with someone

Oh Anon. 🥺 I’m so sorry. It’s okay to be sad—you’re human! I’d be sad too if I was inexplicably blocked from following a writer I liked!! I hope it was an accident; that maybe you were just caught in the crossfire of a pornbot sweep. 🥺 I hope you get to enjoy their work without the hurt of this ruining their stories for you.

If it was deliberate, then—whatever! I’ve said this before and I’ll say this again and again: fanfic is never so serious that you need to provide an itinerary to a stranger in order to justify how you read something, even if they created it.

Please remember that the only thing you owe a writer in this community and fandom at large, Anon, is not being a dick LOL. You’re allowed to read however you want to! You’re allowed to exist!!! Don’t let one individual’s intense policing of their space scare you into changing how you exist. 🥺 Yes, writers like to be told nice things about the stuff they write—they like hearing that the hard work has paid off. But here’s the thing: writers make an active choice to freely share their work online. Fandom is a gift culture; fanfic is the gift. You don’t demand payment for gifts. You can hope someone likes it enough that they tell you, LOL, and maybe you’ll get to see it in the wild or maybe you get a nice little thank-you card with a cute little picture of a rose on the front, but you cannot demand these things. If it’s that important that access to your fic is accompanied by a certain set of actions, then put it behind a paywall. The paywall doesn’t guarantee said actions, LOL, but at least then you’re making money. 🥹

It genuinely makes me sad for you, Anon, that you were punished for reading. 🥺 The pushback from writers against not being treated like a content-creator that can churn out things on demand is a fair one, but I think on tumblr it’s misguided and has warped into open season on anyone who isn’t a writer themselves. Writers aren’t machines and we do thrive better when we’re supported; but readers aren’t just numbers, either. People like to use the “social” part in social media as an excuse for this targeting; they forget that the key part to any kind of social community is that it’s made up of all kinds.

Feel your hurt, Anon. 🥺 You did nothing wrong. No matter what your reading looks like in the future—whether you choose to say hello to people or if you continue reading quietly and cosily in your downtime—may you always find fics (and people!) who make you happy. 🌷📖

[blue-jisungs]

what do your moots remind you of?

WOOO THANK U FOR SENDING THIS HEHE lets ignore how fucking long it took bye…. let’s say i didn’t struggle AT ALL☝️

zanna @slytherinshua not to be dramatic but you remind me of the sun!! you’re warm, always shining and spreading positive energy even when there are dark clouds over my head or in general!!! ☀️🌞🌤️🌅

@icyminghao noelle, maybe it’s the “icy” in your username but you remind me of a cold drink on a hot day 🫡 you’re refreshing and i always look forward to talk with you, just like i do when i’m thirsty and it’s 792921927219 degrees outside. you’re funky and cool, like the colourful liquids in a glass with a cute small umbrella in it 🍹🧊

@l3visbby ola you remind me of a cinnamon roll 🥹 you’re so sweet and cute like one (pocieszna if you will but in a good way)!! if u don’t look at it you could kill if you wanted 🫵 help i couldn’t find the emoji 🍩🍪🍮🍰

@enluv coco this is vv specific but you remind me of a holiday in a tropical country 😭😭😭 maybe it’s the coco(nut) in your name LMAO but it’s just… so relaxing talking to you. taking a break from the real busy world and chilling, enjoying yourself and being yourself… and having fun all the time <3 🥥🌴🏖️🧉

@rubywonu nia you remind me of a candle. no matter the scent (my fav maybe, coffee or gingerbreads hehe) you always light up the room and spread comfort. hopefully your light will never go out!!! and if it does, i’ll be running with a lighter to help it shine again (help i wanted to be poetic but i hope you get me) 🕯️🕯️🕯️

@mirxzii roxie you remind me of bubbles :D full of joy and happiness, you bring a smile to everyone’s face!! full of colors and positivity <3 and and!! a fun time guaranteed 🫧🫧🫧🫧

@fairyhaos yena… you remind me of a forest. but like a forest with pine trees, full of moss and fog… in a good way! i love forests ngl so 😭 but you are so knowledgeable and helpful, beautiful inside and out, making me feel respect towards you and happiness and comfort when being around 🌲🪵🌳

@txt-yaomi it seems weird but sof, you remind me of a electric guitar. you’re just so cool and full of swag !! i always wanted to learn how to play one and in general seeing people play the guitar makes me stare at them in awe and respect, just like you! hi rockstar!! 🎸🎸🎸

@etherealyoungk skye reminds me of a warm cup of tea <3 i love tea, no matter the flavour. i could never get tired of it and it always makes me feel better, just like you. you bring comfort and that’s what i feel when having a cup of tea with book in my hand ☕️🫖🍵

@planetkiimchi you remind me of headphones 😭😭😭 vut honestly i can’t live without headphones. you’re fun, always around, full of joy and happiness, talking to you always gives me a boost of energy and good mood – just like headphones and the fav music they’re playing 🎧🎧🎧

@malarign joo you remind me of flowers… i can’t really explain it, but flowers are so beautiful and make me stare at them in awe, wonder about the way they prosper and all. if you don’t think abt it flowers tend to have their own mechanisms, adaptation to the environment etc etc it’s just… so admirable. amazing. i always stop and look and flowers n smell them, sometimes they’re small but full of joy, beauty and peace. and some of them are a lil funky… so i couldn’t pick a one flower to describe you since you remind me of all of them 💐🌷🌸🌺🌼🪻

@wqnwoos hana u remind me of a calm sea… the soft sound of waves and the colors of it bringing a sense of peace, joy n relax… staring at sea for hours and feeling comfort or dipping your feet in the cold water when you failed to run away from the water, a rush of energy and silliness hitting… that’s you!! 🌊🌊🌊🌊

@wheeboo hmm rania, maybe it’s the whee in your username that reminds me of wheat lmao or your general aura but you remind me of a golden field of wheat that you pass on a road trip. it’s shining golden in the sun, with its own peace rustling on the wind. it may seem as a common, boring thing but it’s definitely not: just think about the usage of it. rania i can’t put it together but you’re so smart and bright and i just hope the connection makes sense 🌾🌾🌾🌾

[4theitgirls]

a little backstory for this poll:

so i am a senior in college and will graduate with my BS in Psych in a year. i am currently enrolled in some prerequisites for a second-degree BSN program that my uni offers.

i enrolled in this program because nursing is such a broad and stable field. you’re basically guaranteed a job no matter what and you have a ton of options so you’re really not stuck in one job. my issue is that i’m not sure if i would be happy in nursing forever and i really don’t want 2 bachelors degrees. i’m enrolled in some prereqs this summer, so if i decide not to do nursing, i need to drop it now.

my main fear is that i’ll be stuck in a career i’m not happy with and i will have been in school so long that i wouldn’t want to go back for something else. if i went to grad school for something else like psychology or neuroscience, there would be no prereqs, but i may have a tougher time finding a job. i just don’t know if nursing is a great option for me and i don’t know if i’d be happy as a nurse for the rest of my life.

[teabutmakeitazure]

Hello! May I request O and Q for any character please? Hope you're having a good day so far<3

a/n: I didn't know who to use this one with so I did Zhongli lol. Have a good day lovely moot :3

>Yan! Zhongli x Fem! Reader

Prompts: O - Orchid (love, beauty) "My, you're breathtaking. Your beauty needs to be cherished."

Q- Queen of the meadow (uselessness) "Be grateful you've got me. Who else would take care of such a useless thing like you?"

Warning: sliiightly suggestive

Word count: ~0.6k

Even with his thousands of years of existence, he sometimes never knows when to stop talking. He keeps going on and on about some random thing in the room or a random topic you somehow brought up. It’s understandable. He needs to refresh his memories to delay erosion for as long as he can, but why did you have to fall victim to it? Wasn’t being a victim of his gaze and hands enough?

“I’ve been proved correct that silk would look marvellous on you.”

His hands are by far the worst, always looking to greedily grab as much as they can and as inappropriately as they can.

“My, you’re breathtaking. Your beauty needs to be cherished. What do you say? Shall we go on a long walk?”

“I think I’ll stay home.”

He says nothing in return, happy at the prospect of keeping wandering eyes away. Honestly, with his words and treatment of you, it sometimes feels like you’re a human sized decoration piece for him. It’s suffocating. Even now as his hands wander from your hip to your shoulder blades, playing with the flimsy straps of your ‘dress’, you don’t dare to move. Your place is on his lap till he gets tired of wandering his hands and either lets you go in favour of another long conversation or decides to satisfy his needs.

Both outcomes are unfavourable.

“Do you know what aspect of mortality I find the most appealing?”

“I don’t.” And I frankly couldn’t care less.

“It is the fact that I can indulge in matters that are more personal and selfish without the guilt of ignoring my duty.”

A gloved hand grabs your own, the other massaging the exposed skin of your left thigh, and brings it up to his lips. As he kisses the knuckle of your ring finger, he makes eye contact. Golden eyes shine brighter as his oddly shaped pupils dilate.

“Had you been born a thousand years earlier, I'm sure that the citizens would tell tales about us today.”

“I prefer secrecy,” you scowl, “I wouldn’t like being praised for something I detest.”

Zhongli warningly squeezes the flesh of your thigh, gaze still soft as he keeps staring at your face. Your features had always been his favourite sight. Even now with the dim lighting, he doesn't look away.

"You will come to see my generosity and love someday."

"On my deathbed."

Another squeeze to your flesh, harder this time, and his gaze hardens. "Be grateful you've got me. Who else would take care of such a useless thing like you?"

"I was fine before you."

"I've heard your prayers before, my dear. You prayed to a statue of the seven every week, asking for my guidance to prosperity. How can you say that you were fine before me when all you were was an unborn child?"

Is he really going to play his archon card again? If you had known that Rex Lapis himself would be the source of your misery, you would never have even called yourself a follower. Who knows? Maybe if you become a hard enough atheist, he might disappear.

"As your Archon, you are to submit to me when asked. However, I'll make you a special exception."

When he leans in, his lips ghost over the skin underneath your ear.

"Why don't you give me a taste of mortal desire? I can guarantee," his hands slide under your dress and move to your bare hips, "I won't disappoint."

[huggybug]

I need some angst😈Could you do poppy telling Trevor she hates him after a disagreement? Whether she’s younger or older is up to you.

Poor Trevor’s heart couldn’t handle it

happy dilf day!

“You’re not going” Trevor shook his head and you looked to Poppy who was now enraged.

“What! We’ve been planning this for a month! Mom!” She turned to you but you were quick to put your hands up in surrender.

“Don’t look at me” You sighed, “This is all your dad”

“Thanks for the backup” Trevor mumbled and you just rolled your eyes. This all started because Poppy wanted to go to a party on Thursday night, it was something her whole grade was going to or something like that… you honestly didn’t hear why it was so important. Trevor was completely against her going since it was on a school night and while you personally would let her go, he was the one in the battle not you.

“Dad… I have to go, this is like the biggest party of the year. If I’m not there, everyone will think I’m a total loser!”

“Well hopefully your friends are nice enough to hang out with a loser” Trevor shrugged.

“You’re such a hypocrite!”

“What? How?” He laughed.

“You totally went out partying when you were my age and don’t try to say you didn’t because Uncle Jack has told me all about it!” You stifle a laugh at that but Trevor looks unamused.

“Of course he did” Trevor rolled his eyes, “That doesn’t matter though. You’re not going, end of story”

“Ugh! Are you trying to ruin my life? I hate you!” Poppy screams, running out of the kitchen and up the stairs, slamming her bedroom door which echoes through the house.

“That went from 0-100 fast” You say, looking up from your phone to find Trevor looking distraught. “What?”

“She… she hates me?” He asks. “I feel horrible, I should let her go to the party, I don’t care that much. She-”

“Trevor” You say firmly, “Relax, she’s fine. She doesn’t hate you”

“But she said…”

“Do you really think she means that? She’s just being dramatic, she is a teenage girl after all” You snicker, “Don’t you remember all the shit I used to say? It’s just a girl thing”

“I thought that was the pregnancy hormones” Trevor shrugged and you laughed.

“Give her some time, it’ll blow over soon” You got up from your chair, walking over to kiss him quickly. “I’ve gotta go pick up Lottie, don’t worry about Poppy, okay?”

“Well if she hates me maybe I’ll have better luck with the other ones” Trevor offered a half-smile before leaning down to kiss you again.

“I guarantee you a 100% success rate… maybe 80 actually, depending how hard you are on Lu when the draft comes around” You winked, grabbing your purse off the counter and yelling bye to Poppy as you ran out the door.

…

“Dad?” Poppy pokes her head into Trevor’s office where he had been sulking all afternoon.

“Hey P” Trevor slid his phone onto the desk, pushing away from it to turn to his daughter.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that I hate you because I don’t. I definitely don’t” Poppy fumbled with her phone in her hands. “It was stupid and the party isn’t even a big deal, I just… I don’t want you to think I actually meant it”

“You know I just want you to be safe right?” Trevor can’t help thinking how cliché that sentence sounded but when Poppy nodded, he continued. “I’m not trying to ruin your life as much as it may seem to you” He raised an eyebrow at her, “If you really want to go to that party…”

“It’s fine, I already told my friends I can’t” Poppy shrugged.

“I thought you’d be a loser if you didn’t go”

“I’ll just really promote the whole ‘my dad’s the best hockey player ever’ thing and maybe it’ll offset the loser status”

Trevor laughed, “I wouldn’t say best ever…”

“Well I would” Poppy grinned, “Best ever hockey player and dad”

[crownmemes]

Mycroft Holmes (Sherlock) Sentences

(Sentences from Mycroft Holmes from Sherlock (2010-2017). Adjust phrasing where needed)

“I would make some kind of threat, but I’m sure your situation is quite clear to you.”

“You don’t seem very afraid”

“Bravery is by far the kindest word for stupidity, don’t you think?”

“You don’t seem the kind to make friends easily.”

“Did it never occur to you that you and I belong on the same side?”

“We have more in common than you’d like to believe.”

“No, no, no, I can’t possibly be away from the office for any length of time. Not with the elections so… Well, you don’t need to know about that, do you?”

“Don’t make me order you.”

“For God’s sake, put your clothes on!”

“Don’t be alarmed, it’s to do with sex.”

“All lives end, all hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage.”

“You seem desperate for my attention, which I’m sure can be arranged.”

“Our traditions define us.”

“I need you to give this matter your full attention - is that quite clear?”

“They have a few bottles of the 2000 Saint-Emilion, though I prefer the 2001.”

“You know, it is just possible that you won’t be welcome.”

“Don’t be smart. I’m the smart one.”

“If you seem slow to me, can you imagine what real people are like?”

“I’m living in a world of goldfish.”

“I warned you; don’t get involved.”

“What do we say about coincidences?”

“That name you think you may have just heard, you were mistaken. If you ever mention hearing that name in this room, in this context, I guarantee you on behalf of the secret services that materials will be found on your computer hard-drives, resulting in your immediate incarceration.”

“I hope I won’t have to threaten you as well.”

“You may consider him under my protection.”

“If you go against him, then you will find yourself going against me.”

“Am I happy too? I haven’t checked.”

“He’s a necessary evil, not a dragon for you to slay.”

“Your loss would break my heart.”

“As my colleague is fond of remarking, this country sometimes needs a blunt instrument.”

“I am not given to outbursts of brotherly compassion.”

“It is no easy thing for a great mind to contemplate a still greater one.”

“Nobody deceives like an addict.”

“I was there for you before, I’ll be there for you again. I’ll always be there for you.”

“What you are about to see is classified beyond top secret.”

“I don’t like loose ends. Not on my watch.”

“Is that sentiment talking?”

“Agents tend not to reach retirement age. They get retired in a pretty permanent sort of way.”

“Everybody dies. It’s the one thing human beings can be relied upon to do.”

“I have, I think, apologised extensively for that.”

“No, no, stop; I detest conversation in the past tense.”

“Is this merely steam-of-consciousness abuse, or are you attempting to make a point?”

“Why would I need your private number?”

“You have no idea what you’re dealing with. None at all!”

“So, what happens now? Are you going to make deductions?”

“Memories can resurface. Wounds can reopen. The roads we walk have demons beneath.”

“Now, listen to me, for your own physical safety, do not speak!”

“I will not be manipulated like this.”

“We’re not actually going to discuss this, are we?”

“You shame us all. You shame the family name.”

“I was trying to be kind…”

[sorroute]

Hello I saw your doing an event and I would like to participate in it if that’s cool :D I also really like your blog theme too, it’s very pretty C: anyways, I’ll start!

Fandom: I’d like a romantic Neon Genesis Evangelion matchup please!

My name is Jaxrel but I also go by Himawari, Rin, Eden or Luke too! I’m Transgender (ftm), Aromatic, Polyamory, Unlabled, & Bisexual, I’ve been diagnosed with Autism, ADHD, Schizophrenia, BPD & OCD, im wasian (eastern european & west-southeast asian), polish, arab/middle eastern, flipino, scottish & russian.

personality traits (and notes): extroverted, at first awkward, shy and distant when meeting people, extremely independent, when comfortable I talk about a lot of stuff for hours, loud talker, emotions come off as sarcastic or silly (due to autism), confident, straightforward (I have a urge to correct someone of faulty information), uses “big” words, good sense of humor, playful, entertaining, optimistic, mischievous, curious(I’m nosy and I love gossip), i can be a rule breaker(sometimes I don’t mean to), dad/tharapist friend, when I go out I bring water bottles, first aid kit, chapstick(s) just in case, chill but some people would say I have some “repressed anger issues”, I get a realllyyy overractive Brain, I tend to get deep and philosophical when I’m left on my own for to long, I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked, im on the more severe of of the Autism Spectrum so I would like someone to acknowledge that and I also stim when I’m to overwhelmed when there’s a crowded place, to much lighting, etc.

things I love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, I pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i hate kids but i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it, even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, even though hugging makes me uncomfortable i will push past that boundary and hug someone with all my heart if they needed it, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up everyday for the past 12 years despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if i love you, you'll be seen.

hobbies: anime/manga, gaming, anthropology, pathology, zoology, music (I’m a vocaloid/regular producer, i can rap, i make odecore/breakcore/scenecore music and I make music to similar artists I like, dancing, filmmaking, art (drawing, painting, pottery, digital art, etc), learning different instruments/languages, cosplaying, skateboarding, tabletop RPG’s, taking pictures of things that I think are pretty, collecting figurines/stuffed animals and puppetry, science/history, soccer(football)/volleyball/basketball and swim, cooking/baking, art is definitely my main hobby I dedicate a lot of time to it

likes: vocaloid/utau, k-pop/j-pop, vkei, watching documentaries/youtube, decorating my room, iced coffee, boba tea, bread, sharks, cats, cold weather, christmas, musicals, cleaning, rhythm games, being with my friends, shopping, partys, mint candles, sweet and spicy food, any asian food (japanese, korean, chinese, taiwanese, etc), the mandela catalog, your boyfriend (game), roblox(game), otome games and more!

these are some of my top kins!!:  hiyori tomoe (enstars), yoosung kim (mystic messenger), jumin han (mystic messenger), hanako (tbhk), felix kranken (twf), albedo (genshin impact), shoya ishida (a silent voice), tom (eddsworld), eridan (homestuck), karkat (homestuck), shu itsuki (enstars),miyamura izumi (horimiya), micheal afton (FNAF), lolbit (FNAF), mangle (FNAF), natsume sakasaki (enstars), sora harukawa (enstars), urumi akamaki (alice in borderland), V (mystic messenger), hagumi kitazawa (bandori), matsubara kanon (bandori), shinji ikari (neon genesis evangelion), geto suguru (jujustu kaisen), minami kotobuki (oshi no ko), lain iwakura (serial experiments lain), hajime hinata (danganronpa), mondo owada (danganronpa), blade (honkai star rail), hua cheng (TGCF), ame-chan (needy streamer overdose), k-angel (needy streamer overdose) and more....!

I'm a ENTP, 4w3 and a Aquarius

misc: I live in a mixed language house hold where I speak mostly polish and Arabic, and some Korean and Japanese, it world be nice if the person who I get can react to that lol, i know 6 languages (Japanese, Korean, Spanish, Arabic, Polish & French), clumsy; accidentally misuses slang or phrases bc i can never remember how they go (e.g. "bust this popsicle stand" instead of “blow this popsicle stand"); prone to be a bit directionless in life, tries to find comfort and humor in hard times, tries not to take life to seriously, i love dancing a lot, I do a lot of dancing like tiktok (idk I’m so sorry😭) dancing, belly dancing, dabke dancing, I play the electric / bass guitar, piano, cello, koto, and more.

appearance /aesthetic: 5'6 / 167.64 cm, midsize, rectangular body shape, i have a masculine and feminine face (somehow), dimple on chin, hazel eyes, wears glasses, dyed black boy hair, lots of piercings, no tattoos(I need some), for style, i wear a lot such as goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), scenemo/emo, & vkei ouji and lolita, i wear streetwear clothes mostly at home/school/work, i basically wear casual clothes too but can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, i wear fishnets and combat boats/converse, but I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as kimono style, jirai kei, decora, mori kei, cult party kei, i like wearing traditional asian dresses and more but the ones highlighted in purple are the ones I wear mostly.

Thank you! Have a good day!

Hi Jaxrel! ^^ I think you and Kaworu would be a great match for eachother ໒꒰ྀི >ヮ<꒱ྀི১ I was also going to add Shinji to the matchup (polyam) but I wasn't sure if you'd be okay with that so I only did Kaworu </3 If you want another one with Shinji feel free to ask!

I also thought of Atsushi while reading this, so here it is <3

Kaworu

Realest t4t relationship EVER !!!!

And autism4autism

These are just my heacnanons you don't have to follow them :3

Anyways, Kaworu adores you

You're like a pair of silly cats

You guys gossip together all the time

Everyone hates your relationship because you both are mischievous and silly and they are done with you guys

You guys will 100% have really late night philosophical convos at like 3am

Kaworu is very hyper aware of how you're feeling so if you ever feel overstimulated or overwhelmed he's on it right away

Will move you to a quieter space if possible and either leave you alone if you wish or will talk about it with you<3

He also gets overstimulated I feel so he may be able to tell the warning signs easier

Will make any accomodations you need in terms of lighting and temperature and stuff (and anything else ofc!)

Cat fathers of 84 kitties

Gets you cherry Pepsi all the time just to see you get all excited because he thinks it's so so so cute (cherry Pepsi specifically because I think he would also like cherry Pepsi idk)

He thinks how you kiss all your stuffies goodnight is kind of silly and he doesn't really get it that much, but eventually he starts doing it too ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

He listens to your music all the time !! It's not really his style, but it makes him feel closer to you and he still thinks it's great even if it's not his taste <3

He asks you to teach him how to dance (he's horrifyingly horrible at it)

He begs you to teach him how to speak EVERY language you speak

He's very impressed but honestly not surprised because he thinks you're so amazing (and you are!!!!)

YOU GUYS PLAY PIANO TOGETHER LIKE THAT ONE SCENE OF KAWORU AND SHINJI EXCEPT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO PLAY !!!!!

He loves your style and aesthetic

Again, he doesn't get it at all, but he loves it on you

Brags about how cool and talented and handsome you are (with your permission! Won't if you ask him not to !!)

Atsushi

Lowkey scared of you............

He loves you though

Thinks you're so cool and handsome but your first meeting was SO awkward

Atsushi stood there in awe trying to comprehend the fact that you were talking to him (he was probably feeling down and you approached him)

You complimented him and he almost broke down in the middle of a park

He's ALWAYS worried about you, wondering if you had somehow gotten yourself into trouble

Whenever you talk he always gets startled because of how loud you speak 😭

I feel like you're sort of like his personal vet (y'know... With him being a tiger.... Kitty cat... And you're interested in anthropology and zoology and stuff.... And you like cats... Idk)

Like Kaworu, he's not the biggest fan of the type of music you're into, but he's definitely listened to all your songs before<3

Literally all of them

With how you dress, sometimes you remind him of Ryunosuke with your Victorian goth (it's not exactly the same but has the same vibe)

Having grown up in an orphanage, he probably only knows Japanese and maybe some English, so he is BAFFLED when he finds out how many languages you speak?

How do you even keep track of that???? He's so impressed and, unlike Kaworu, very surprised because I feel like he didn't even know someone could know that many languages at once

He definitely tries to learn Arabic (he doesn't think he could handle more than that, he already struggles with two 💔)

Too nervous to ask you to teach him so he tries to teach himself

He? Kind of learns? But not really

Is horrified at the idea of you getting tattoos or more piercings

Not because he dislikes them, but because he dislikes the idea of you possibly being in pain :(

He's overdramatic and traumatized shhh

He tries to splurge on your favorite foods for you, but he's pretty broke so he always feels bad when he can't get you anything

Will definitely try to get you your favorite drinks though <3

He's not as observant as Kaworu, but is always stressing and worrying about your needs so you may have to tell him or signal to him if you're feeling overstimulated, but once he knows he's immediately getting you out of there and comforting you as best he can :3

Your scent is like catnip to him, he loves it

You're his safe space, and he tries to make himself as much of a safe space for you as you are for him<3333

A/N

Wrote this while listening to Antithesis Kisama kai by Syudou ໒꒰ྀི 𖦹 ˕ × ꒱ྀིა‎ ‎ ‎Also tysm for the compliment<3 ‎ Anyway, I'm really sorry I didn't add the NSFW headcanons 😭 I wasn't comfortable writing anything for Kaworu and I didn't know how to feel about writing nsfw for Atsushi either </3 so sorry </333 I hope you enjoyed this either way!! Feel free to let me know your thoughts ^_^

[anlian-aishang]

I've been writing on tumblr for 3 years. Here's the advice I would have given to myself.

I still stand by everything I said after my first year, so read that first!

You are more than a writer, more than a blogger, more than your tumblr.

It sounds cliché, but it is true. When you spend time on this website, even if it is just five minutes a day, it becomes part of your identity. At the same time, it is important that you don’t reduce your identity to only this. Otherwise, notes become lifeblood. Word counts represent your ability. The number of fics you produce is a figure of your productivity. When any of those are low, they can disproportionately affect your happiness. 

When it feels too much, take a break, take a breath. Remember: this is all for free-time fun. Sometimes, this website may make you feel bad about yourself. Those times are the moments to remember that you make up tumblr, but it doesn’t make up you. 

Life is short. Write what you want.

Who gives a fck if you're the only one on earth who likes it? The fact remains: you like it! Be selfish. Write what you want. There will be someone - whether it is in the future, and whether it is actually future you - who adores it! 

I have repeatedly made the mistake of delaying my multichapters to focus on fulfilling requests. This has led me to having multiple fics go 1-2 years without updates, and trust me, that's not a fun place to be. YOUR blog/fic/writing/hobby is for YOU. Prioritize yourself and your happiness. This leads me to my next point...

If it’s agony, take a break. Come back and it’s still agony? Take a longer break.

Writing is supposed to be fun, but the second it feels not fun, it is the most painful exercise known to mankind. Is your cheek in your hand? Are your fingers refusing to type? Do you feel tears looking at the screen? These are all signs that you should take a break! If you come back from your break and it still hurts, stay on your break until it feels right again. 

I just got off of a two-month break. There was no pressure behind my return, I just felt like writing again, and when I did, the prose flowed like caramel. I cranked out 10,000 words in a week. And speaking of word counts...

Turn the word counter off.

More words does not equal higher quality (nor does it equal higher note count, if you care about that). No fic, no scenario requires X many words. I’ve written major character death in less than 1000 words. I’ve also written quickie car sex in over 3000 words. Some of my favorite fics are over 10k words with multiple chapters. Others are headcanons with less than 300 words! Word count is not important, and neither is...

There is no such thing as correct characterization.

Ask fans of a series how a character would react in a situation and I guarantee that there will not be any two identical responses. Sure, you can prefer someone's characterization over another's, you can even consider it more canon, but none of us know the canon because the series/creator does not show us all (i.e. the character in the omegaverse, the character in a fantasy AU, the character at hot pot). So, don't stress yourself out over achieving perfect characterization. The truth is, we cannot know for sure.   

The deeper truth is that it doesn't matter. Fic is for the things we cannot achieve in reality. Do I really think this character would cook me a four-course dinner every week? No. But is that what I want? YES. So that’s how I’ll write it! 

Even if the character’s creator explicitly said something about them, why can’t you write otherwise? Here is the secret: there is no reason. ((Do you know how heartbroken I was when Isayama reportedly said that Levi Ackerman likes tall women? And here I am at 150 cm? There was no reason for me to be upset.)) Write what you want! Write who you want!  

When you can't remember all the requests you have, it's time to close your requests.

Trust me, I know how tempting it is to keep your inbox permanently open. FOMO, right? What if a really great, life-changing request is out there, but you miss it because your inbox is closed? 

Here is the solution: there is always a way to get more fic ideas. Prompt lists, songs, AUs, those little moments of inspiration you get in your day-to-day, they will all lead to fic! Requests are not the end-all-be-all. However, if you let them stack up and up, they will turn into the end-all-be-all. Having double digits in your inbox is daunting and even paralyzing. 

I have long pondered how to know when the time is right to close your requests, and I think the (or an) answer is when you cannot remember all of them without checking. 

Make sure you know tumblr’s tag rules, or else your fics may not show up in search results. 

I learned this the hard way. If you put #nsfw, #bdsm, #submissive, #dominant, #latex, or any other suggestive term in the hashtags, your post will NOT show up in ANY search results. Don’t be discouraged if your fics don’t get many notes PERIOD, but also, if you care about visibility, make sure to experiment with what tags will not show up. 

You do this for free, so do it for fun!

Writing is difficult and every day seems to present new obstacles. At the same time, though, there is so much good to be had from it. I have met the most wonderful people. I have had the biggest laughs. Three years worth of fic, memories, and friendships that I would not have had - had I not had the courage to type all that time ago. 

When you feel discouraged, and there will be times you do, remember all the good. <3

[everlastlady]

Hi there!! thank you so much for letting me do a trade matchup with you! it means a lot to me ^_^ and since you said that I can request another matchup for Alastor I’ll do it here right now! zacznijmy od tego (:

Fandom: I’d like a romantic matchup for Hazbin Hotel please (part 2 with Alastor since you almost chose him LOL)

My name is Jaxrel but I also go by Himawari, Rin or Eden too! I’m Transgender (FTM), Aromatic, Polyamory, Unlabled, & Bisexual, I’ve been diagnosed with Autism, ADHD, Schizophrenia, BPD & OCD, im wasian (eastern european & west-southeast asian), polish, arab/iraqi/middle eastern, flipino, scottish & russian.

personality traits (and notes): extroverted, at first awkward, shy and distant when meeting people, extremely independent, when comfortable I talk about a lot of stuff for hours, loud talker, emotions come off as sarcastic or silly (due to autism), confident, straightforward (I have a urge to correct someone of faulty information), uses “big” words, when I'm bored or feeling trapped, I become anxious, scattered, and impatient. I may make impulsive decisions or take needless unnecessary risks, I tend to enjoy strategizing, problem-solving, and brainstorming new ways to complete everyday tasks, good sense of humor, playful, entertaining, optimistic, mischievous, curious(I’m nosy and I love gossip), i can be a rule breaker(sometimes I don’t mean to), dad/tharapist friend, when I go out I bring water bottles, first aid kit, chapstick(s) just in case, chill but some people would say I have some “repressed anger issues”, I get a realllyyy overractive Brain, I tend to get deep and philosophical when I’m left on my own for to long, I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked, im on the more severe of of the Autism Spectrum so I would like someone to acknowledge that and I also stim when I’m to overwhelmed when there’s a crowded place, to much lighting, etc.

Love Languages & Dates: I have all the love languages I'm serious lmaoo, for dates it would be like going to a movie theater and then afterwards we can go get dinner, or personal for me I would like to go to an arcade and the shop for a little and whatever my partner wants really lolz xP

things I love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, I pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i hate kids but i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it, even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, even though hugging makes me uncomfortable i will push past that boundary and hug someone with all my heart if they needed it, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up everyday for the past 12 years despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if i love you, you'll be seen.

hobbies: anime/manga, gaming, anthropology, pathology, zoology, music (I’m a vocaloid/regular producer, i rap, i make odecore/breakcore/scenecore music and I make music like ATARASHII GAKKO, BABYMETAL, YOASOBI & Ado too), dancing, filmmaking, art (drawing, painting, pottery, digital art, etc), writing, learning different instruments/languages, cosplaying, skateboarding, tabletop RPG’s, taking pictures of things that I think are pretty, collecting figurines/stuffed animals/music CDs and puppetry, science/history, soccer(football)/volleyball/basketball and swim, cooking/baking, art is definitely my main hobby I dedicate a lot of time to it.

likes: vocaloid/utau, k-pop/j-pop, V系, watching documentaries/youtube, decorating my room, iced coffee, boba tea, bread, sharks, cats, hotels, cold weather, christmas, musicals, cleaning, rhythm games, being with my friends, shopping, partys, mint candles, sweet and spicy food, any asian food (japanese, korean, chinese, taiwanese, etc), the mandela catalog, your boyfriend (game), roblox(scp 3008, get a snack at 3am, flicker), otome games and more!

these are some of my top kins!!:  hiyori tomoe (enstars), yoosung kim (mystic messenger), jumin han (mystic messenger), hanako (tbhk), felix kranken (twf), albedo (genshin impact), shoya ishida (a silent voice), tom (eddsworld), eridan (homestuck), karkat (homestuck), shu itsuki (enstars),miyamura izumi (horimiya), micheal afton (FNAF), lolbit (FNAF), mangle (FNAF), natsume sakasaki (enstars), sora harukawa (enstars), V (mystic messenger), hagumi kitazawa (bandori), matsubara kanon (bandori), shinji ikari (neon genesis evangelion), geto suguru (jujustu kaisen), nanami kento (jujustu kaisen), minami kotobuki (oshi no ko), lain iwakura (serial experiments lain), hajime hinata (danganronpa), blade (honkai star rail), hua cheng (TGCF), ame-chan (needy streamer overdose), k-angel (needy streamer overdose) and more....!

I'm a ENTP, 4w3 and a Aquarius

misc: I live in a mixed language house hold where I speak mostly polish and Arabic, and some Korean and Japanese, it world be nice if the person who I get can react to that lol, i know 6 languages (Japanese, Korean, Spanish, Arabic, Polish & French), clumsy; accidentally misuses slang or phrases bc i can never remember how they go (e.g. "bust this popsicle stand" instead of “blow this popsicle stand"); prone to be a bit directionless in life, tries to find comfort and humor in hard times, tries not to take life to seriously, i love dancing a lot, I do a lot of dancing like tiktok (idk I’m so sorry😭) dancing, belly dancing, dabke dancing and more.

appearance /aesthetic: 5'6 / 167.64 cm, midsize, rectangular body shape, i have a masculine and feminine face (somehow), dimple on chin, hazel eyes, sometimes wears glasses, dyed black boy hair, lots of piercings, no tattoos(I need some), for style, i wear a lot such as goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), scenemo/emo, & vkei ouji and lolita, i wear streetwear clothes mostly at home/school/work, i basically wear casual clothes too but can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, i wear fishnets and combat boats/converse, but I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as kimono style, jirai kei, decora, mori kei, cult party kei and more, i like wearing traditional asian dresses here and there, but the ones highlighted are the ones I wear mostly.

thank you so much again for this opportunity again! 낮이든 밤이든 좋은 시간 보내세요! وداعا الآن

Finally getting this posted even though writing has been quite draining especially with the things going on real life but I hope that you enjoy this story/match up with Alastor! 🤍

Hazbin Hotel Matchup: Alastor The Radio Demon

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✰- Author's Note: Another Hazbin Hotel Matchup remember to eat a meal or a snack, drink some water, get some fresh air, take your medicine, and remember that you are loved. If you loved this story remember to comment, click or tap that heart button, reblog with tags, and blaze if you can. Always remember to support your local writers. ♡♡♡

✰- Posted: 10/27/2023

✰- Story Contains: Alastor, Romance, Partner Alastor, & Sweet Moments.

✰- Word Count: 1712

✰- matchup is for: @averagetoyakinnie

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The radio demon never really bothered with love, of course he had a few people he cared about. But love? Alastor didn’t really care about it; that was until he started working at the hotel, he met you at first Alastor didn’t know why he found you interesting, but he did. Seeing how awkward you were made Alastor laughed - he would try his best to get you to come out of your shell around him. But he did find your shyness adorable, to the point that whenever meeting people Alastor would help you introduce yourself and make you feel welcomed to the hotel; or when getting something to eat with him and Rosie. Rosie also adored you and made sure to keep an eye on you whenever Alastor was busy. Once you are comfortable around Alastor, he could listen to you talk for hours about things you hate or like. He doesn’t mind that you speak loud; it lets him know that you are passionate. Alastor can match your silly and sarcastic energy which can turn into a game for the both of you. Seeing you be confident and straightforward makes Alastor grin ear to ear, he loves a partner that can stand up for themselves especially when he’s not around since Hell is a tough place. Alastor will do his best to make everyday fun for the both of you or give you some space so that you don’t feel anxious or scattered. He doesn’t mind if you are inpatient. Alastor will watch you help Charlie with her hotel, seeing you be able to solve problems in the hotel or demons that are causing them. He still thanks you for finding a way to get Angel Dust to leave him alone. His little busy bee, he knows what your thinking face looks like, the amount of times he has come home and kissed you because you gave him ideas on how to one up or annoy Vox made him happy. He doesn’t talk about you in front of Vox after messing with him. He doesn’t want Vox coming after you. So you two aren’t really seen in public so whenever you two are out it’s usually with a group or the two of you pretend to be friends so that Vox doesn’t use you against Alastor.

Alastor always tells you a joke, seeing you smile makes Alastor happy but hearing you laugh makes his heart flutter. He’s glad that you have a sense of humor because he also loves your jokes or seeing you be mischievous. The two of you are nosy; so the two of you know all the hotel gossip. This helps Alastor make deals with other demons. When he comes home; he will tell you things about the demons he made deals with. Alastor is your gossip partner, even if you sometimes enjoy gossip with Angel Dust. You still love having a cute gossip session in bed with Alastor. He even has juicy gossip about the overlords in Hell. Before dating Alastor he had seen you break a lot of hotel rules with Husk and Angel Dust. Whenever Alastor caught you and the two of you locked eyes. You would freeze in fear thinking he would tell Charlie. But he the demonic deer would only smile and put a finger towards his lips before walking away, he never told on you because he loves to see how sneaky you can be even if it means breaking a few rules. Even though Alastor doesn’t want kids, he knows that you would make a great parent because you have that fatherly side towards you. “ Thanks for the water (name) “ Charlie would say as the two of you work in the hotel garden. “ Thanks for listening (Name) “ Husk would say after drinking so much that he would go on a drunken rant about his old life while you helped him back home and into bed. Alastor could tell that you hide your anger, sometimes he wants you to release but other times he doesn’t want to force it; whenever you pop then Alastor will be there for you.

He could tell that you are autistic, he loves you and does his best to understand your condition. Seeing you stim is something Alastor takes notes on. If places are too crowded Alastor will get you out of that place. Alastor’s home doesn’t have bright lights. It's very dim at his place so you never have to worry about bright lights. Alastor doesn’t like seeing you overwhelmed so he will do everything in his power to make you feel safe, calm, and comfortable. You and Alastor know all the love languages. The two of you see a lot of movies together even if you both have different types of film taste. Alastor likes to cook dinner for you both. Tying his hair back and wearing a pink apron that has strawberries on it with the red letters that spell “ kiss or kill the cook “ you got it for him when you moved in. Alastor will cook your favorite meals or meals from his mother’s recipe books. But if you two do go out to eat. Alastor will take you to the finest restaurants. Alastor doesn’t really understand video games but he likes to watch you play; you got him into animal crossing….. Don’t look at his animal village. He hates this thought and fears it, here is what it is and why. You are caring towards others; always helping other people or animals. You have such a kind heart it makes Alastor wonder how did you end up in Hell, so if Charlie’s project does work then maybe you will get into Heaven - Alastor is unsure if he will ever get into Heaven, but if you do then Alastor refuses to date anyone else and will spend every night talking to the sky hoping you could hear him from Heaven. But those are just thoughts he has; he’s happy that you are by his side right now.

He won’t do anything to risk you not getting into Heaven. Especially if it’s something that you want. Alastor can see that fiery passion that makes him love that part of you always standing up for what you believe in. Even if the situation can be scary, he admires how brave you can be. “ I’m proud of you my dear. “ Alastor would place a kiss on your cheek. Alastor does spoil you a lot, he will buy you whatever you desire. He doesn’t like when you drink energy drinks like red bull but if you want then he buys it. “ Energy drinks are nasty, but I found a way to get you one, here you are my dear. “ Alastor said, placing the drink in your hand. Even Alastor doesn’t like sweets. He does keep his cabinet and fridge with some sweets for you. He gets you the best sweet treats, the only sweet thing he would eat with you, are strawberries and this because he grows those tasty little things with you. Alastor watches you a lot, so one time he watched you kiss the heads of all your plushies goodnight, when he asked why you do this; you told him just in case they are alive this caused him to roll on the floor while laughing. He finds it funny but also adorable that you do this. Sometimes when you aren’t looking he will use his magic to move one of the plushies when you kiss their head, this makes you think you are just seeing things but that was until you caught Alastor and chased him because of this. Even though Alastor is a mischievous trickster who loves to laugh and cause chaos sometimes his days aren’t wonderful his mental health wouldn’t be the best and he would lay in bed. You notice this so you would stay home and clean up the house, check on Alastor seeing if he’s ready to talk, and make his favorite meal. Alastor is grateful for all this and will hug you from behind before mumbling thank you against your neck.

Alastor could see that you still have humanity in you, especially the emotional parts of you. Whenever you two have a movie night and cuddle on the couch watching movies. You would cry at tragic or happy scenes in the movies. He always has a box of tissues nearby and would hug you close. Alastor doesn’t mind your hobbies even if he doesn't get some of them. You did kinda get him into video games like before he loves to play animal crossing but he does find horror physiology games interesting and will play them whenever he has free time, sometimes those physiology horror games come in handy with his victims. Alastor has tried some asian dishes with you. He finds Mandela Catalog interesting and is something he likes to watch with you at night in bed. You and Alastor sit in the window with you in between his legs and your back against his chest, watching the rain as his radio plays smooth jazz. Alastor finds it fascinating that you can speak six languages. He knows a lot of languages himself so the two of you have conversations in different languages to keep each other educated on these languages. With Alastor being taller than you because you are only 5’6 he teases you a lot but also likes to pick you up. But he knows that you are what is considered average height. He finds your fashion sense interesting, seeing you in new and different outfits. He always compliments you and will go out of his way to buy you the outfits you want, even if you two go shopping and when you look in the mirror at an outfit that is on display he will get it for you. His favorite outfit to see you in is your Victorian goth outfit. He thinks you look breathtaking. Maybe sometimes he will match with you only if he is up for it. Alastor loves everything about you and will never leave you behind or put you in harm's way. He didn’t bother with love but now that he has met you, he will always bother with it.