#there's also the fact they both raise the Antichrist but that's a funny little extra

[mandrake-arya]

Do we as a community agree on the fact that Linus Baker and Aziraphale are basically the same person or it's just me

[crantzypants]

Crowley and Aziraphale accidentally raising the Antichrist together sounds like an amazing and equally hilarious idea.

This started as a “haha what if i write down a few thoughts” and ended up as a full story outline ohhhhhh boy!

It’s wild. Crowley doesn’t want the baby that is being swapped to just be abandoned, who KNOWS what Satanic Nuns would do with it! But OOPS somehow with three babies, the Antichrist is the third baby.

But then, because this is now their child, they raise him in a semi-normal way? They don’t have a need to drag their child to the side of good or evil, because they just want their kid to be happy (and teach him how to do pranks. He has to know that gluing coins to the sidewalk is funny, angel). 

And really, a young boy should be able to have fun, and the city is no great place to raise this kid, especially when heaven and hell KNOW Crowley and Zira have been camped out their for centuries now. Why not just…live in Tadfield? Share time between a small cottage that no one but them knows about, and keep their places in the city to keep thwarting evil and appearances? 

They know that the Warlock, the supposed Antichrist, needs to be raised, so simply take positions as tutors. A nine-to-five, and switching off days so that someone can stay at home with Adam. As he grows up, Adam catches on to the fact that his parents are Something Else, but is just as happy to have two parents that love him, and friends he can spend time with.

Every now and then, Adam does something odd because of his powers as the Antichrist. Both Crowley and Zira never catch on about who their son is, and questions if their presence or powers can rub off on humans. They’ve hung around humans for a long time, and none of them started developing powers. 

Both are fools and don’t connect the dots.

They figure out that a Hellhound should be coming for the Antichrist, and Crowley agrees to go to Warlock’s party, while Zira stays back at home and sets up something for Adam’s birthday but please please Zira just call for help if you set the kitchen on fire again. 

And then Crowley calls, while Adam is out playing with his friends in the woods.

Zira: Hello dear, did, did Warlock turn away the Hellhound?

Crowley: …No.

Zira: Oh no, this is not good.

Crowley: The hound never showed up.

Zira: Excuse me, what?

Crowley: Wrong child.

Zira: Wrong child.

And while Crowley drives back to their house to concoct a plan, Adam and his friends walk in, Dog right behind them. Zira sees Dog, and suddenly he starts seeing the math around his head as it dawns on him that maybe he has been raising the f*cking Antichrist all this time. 

Crowley gets home, and right off the bat thinks they should go to the Old Hospital, because where did they go wrong? To which Zira responds with, “Oh, did you know that our son found a dog today? Apparently, Dog just FOUND HIM. WHILE PLAYING IN THE WOODS. THIS AFTERNOON WHILE YOU WERE WAITING FOR THE HELLHOUND.” And Crowley nearly discorporates. Heaven and Hell are going to be coming for THEIR SON. THEIR SON, WHO IS SUPPOSED TO END THE WORLD. He was a little rowdy and a bit brash, but his heart has always been in the right place, and was always kind. Their must have been a different mix-up, right? 

But they can’t question Adam about anything, because he’s off with his friends, apparently going witch-hunting. But they need to figure out if he is the Antichrist, and how to stop him if he is without tearing their family apart, and then, THEN, if they are able to do that all successfully, how to deal with the fact that Heaven and Hell will come after the two of them for messing up the Big Plan. 

Of course, by this point, Hell is realizing that Crowley might have bungled the whole job, and is coming to find him. Crowley takes off to London in hopes that he won’t place Zira and Adam in the line of fire, so to speak. 

Zira avoids Heaven’s calls at all cost, and knows that it is only time til they find him and drag him to Heaven. But without Crowley around, he doesn’t have that extra help he needs, and decides that maybe the supposed Witch that moved to town could be the real deal. There were witches, once, and maybe some of them and their offspring survived. 

Zira meets up with Anathema, and she is a wonderfully kind host, and from their conversation, she is also looking for the Antichrist. She avoids how she knows he is HERE in Tadfield, though, and by the end of their tea, Zira has not learned much else. Zira offers that his house is always open, but to make sure that the salt and sugar are not swapped. That’s Adam’s favorite prank when company is over.

Crowley risks driving home to Tadfield, because it IS his son’s birthday and he would actually like to SEE his son today, and picks up Zira who seems to be taking a thoughtful stroll. The two discuss what they’ve found, and Crowley tries to calmly say that he needs to be back in London later. That some “work related things” have popped up from Hell. They make it back home just as Adam and Dog do, and Adam proudly shows off his new pet to Crowley.

Crowley, being a demon, INSTANTLY can tell it is a Hellhound. He tries to brush it off at the moment, set on having a nice birthday dinner, and hoping that this isn’t going to be the last of them.

Zira makes sure that Adam is in bed, and wishes Crowley well on his way back to London. Anything could happen at this point, and Crowley just wants to make sure his family escapes this nightmare alive. Zira stays up all night searching through prophecy books, but nothing here works. He had shifted his most beloved and precious books to Tadfield, but maybe he had left one or two at the shop. Without a second thought, he flies quickly to his shop, hoping that it is ok to leave Adam alone at the house. 

Nothing, there are no books left in the shop that are helpful. Zira sighs, but opens up an old briefcase to bring some books back home with him. He had been ever so slowly moving books out of the shop and into Tadfield, bringing some back to the safety of his shop when Adam had learned the true power of scissors. There is a knock on the door, and honestly it is three in the morning so who on earth?

Two angels walk in, demanding to know where Zira has been the past few days, and how dare he ignore head office to frolic across London with a demon. There are rumors that the two have been seen recently, with a CHILD no less! Zira must cut ties with both immediately, or else face dire consequences. Zira stammers, backing up across the floor, over a rug hiding a sigil. With quick work, he vanishes the carpet and tricks the two into being brought back to Heaven. But if he was found, wouldn’t Crowley have been found as well? Was he in danger too? Zira hurries to Crowley’s apartment, but only sees a smoldering puddle, with a thermos laying still next to it. 

Crowley, really, is very quick to think. Simple work, to place holy water on a door entrance, and see a demon walk into the trap. He’s able to escape, but he has to flee home, and fast. They knew about his time with Zira, and that they were in TADFIELD. This was all adding up to a catastrophic ending for all of them, and if everything was ending, he would much rather be with his family then in Hell or dead, thank you very much. Luckily, at this time of morning, the roads would be pretty empty, so he could make it home quick.

When he gets home though, the only ones there are Adam and Dog. Would Heaven be so open to breaking in and taking Zira? But why not take Adam too? Crowley tries to wait up all night, but doses off on the couch. It being summer, Adam gets up early to play with friends, and runs out the door before Crowley even wakes up. 

Zira, for a good chunk after finding the spilled holy water, mourns. The world is ending, but he had rather hoped that even if it had to, that Crowley would be next to him. But it is morning, and the radio in Crowley’s apartment turns on to odd reports. A Kraken. The sky raining fish. Earthquakes and tornadoes. He has to get home, to Adam, and stop this. He has to sit Adam down and tell him everything that is happening. If he knows he is the Antichrist, knows the destruction he could cause, maybe his son would not go through with it.

The M25 is burning, and all Zira can do is hold onto his hope that him and his family will come out on the other end of this alive as he flies through. 

When Crowley wakes up, Zira is still not home. Based on the dirty plate left in the sink, Adam had left in the morning with Dog and his friends. There is a knock on the door. Wearily, he answers it to find a young woman and a man, Anathema and Newt, asking if they knew where Adam had gone to. Crowley figures he has gone into the woods, but he knows this is the last day. He can feel it in his being, hear distantly the cries of Hell, begging for the beginning of a useless war. Anathema says she had to find him first, that they all had to go to the airbase, but would like a lift to where she needed to enter. Crowley agrees, and they all jump into the Bentley, and he drops the two off at an opening in the fence before heading off to the actual entrance on his own. 

He gets there, and walks up to the guard to let him in. As Crowley is being told to walk away, bicycle bells ring out, and the Them ride on by. Adam shouts a quick hello as he rides by, and Crowley is in total shock. From above, there is an odd whistling noise, something like a meteor is plummeting to the ground, right near them. Crowley figures out what is happening too late, realizing that the meteor is Zira, and that his Bentley is in the impact zone. The Bentley is crushed under Zira’s force, and Crowley runs over to check on him. Miraculously, he is more or less fine, a touch on fire and a bit bruised by the fall, but hey, his hoping was strong enough to get him through the fire mostly unscathed. Zira stops before they run in, holding onto Crowley and starting to cry. He had thought– had seen the puddle on the floor– what would he have done without him? 

The two rush in, and see their son facing off against the Horsepeople, and Death giving a final statement before vanishing. And then Gabriel and Bez come in, filled with rage because not only are their incompetent workers on earth here, thwarting the Apocalypse, but it seems that the boy they have been raising was the Antichrist the whole time. “Yeah, my dads are a bit weird, and don’t make a lot of sense, but they seem to care about me and the world, so why shouldn’t I care about the world too”

And to that, both Gabriel and Bez are FURIOUS. This boy should be kicking off a WAR, not siding with traitors about how the earth is GOOD. Bez goes to head office, and before Satan joins the party, Crowley freezes time. Both he and Zira run up to Adam, glad that he is safe and alive, that he did not end the world. Adam is ready to face off against Satan, and basically yells at him that he’s a shit dad and was never there for him anyways (ya know. like in canon). 

Satan vanishes, and all that is left is the Them, Anathema and Newt (who had come out of the base after stopping the attacks) and Crowley and Zira. Zira tells them all to go back to their houses, or he will inform their parents that they broke into a military base. The three bike away, now with more questions about Adam’s dads than before. Anathema and Newt ask for a ride back into town, a little sheepishly on Newt’s part, to which THAT isn’t happening, with the current state of Crowley’s car. They are all forced to walk back into town, exhausted after such a terrifying ordeal. 

Zira and Crowley know they need a plan, that unless they can personally scare off their head offices, Heaven and Hell will be all over them. They figure out how to swap places, and then Zira gets a phone call about his shop. “It’s ok!” the woman on the other end says, “We had paperwork claiming that your shop had burned down, but someone clearly made an error, because when we checked this morning, it was completely fine. When you get the chance, please check on your shop.”

This is the perfect staging, of course. Maybe the call was made by one of their offices, maybe just a coincidence, but they stay swapped while going to investigate. They leave Adam at home, because he would be safer left behind, and also could end anyone that came to abduct or kill him. Both are taken when they take a stroll in the park, and both are able to come out the other side alive and well, and proving their point to not be played with. They might have been on their own side for a while now, but now they were finally free to say it. When they make it home, they are greeted by Adam and Dog, and for once, don’t have to look over their shoulders, and can just be a family.

[azfellandco]

Hiya! So, please feel free to ignore this, but I just listened to Good Omens for the first time with considerable enjoyment, and I was wondering whether you have/know of any good fic rec lists for the book?

hi and welcome and i’m glad you enjoyed the book!! 

General

Something Ordinary by literature_and_ocean_waves (9k)

Summary: “You kidnapped the Antichrist?!”Aziraphale’s shrill screech echoed harshly throughout the dingy bookshop.

Crowley looked sheepishly at his expensive, snakeskin shoes. “Kidnap is such a strong word,” he said. “I rather like liberate.”

This is following what, if you ask me, is a plot this fandom can never write enough of: what if Crowley had kept baby Adam and he and Aziraphale had tried to raise him together? 

Never Mind the Gravitation by Argyle (2k)

Summary: Sure, there’s life on Mars. But Crowley can hardly call it living.

This is not as angsty as that summary makes it sound. …okay it is a little bit, but in a bittersweet kind of way, and it’s so funny as well. This is one of those fics that has the tone of the book down really well and it takes what I feel is an inherently sad concept (humanity moving off world and the places Aziraphale and Crowley call home changing again) and makes it feel hopeful and optimistic. Also scifi is my real true love so like… of course I love this fic. 

Even Without Looking by maniacalmole (18k)

Summary: Aziraphale gets requested by the heavenly court to prove that romantic love is real, and makes a valiant effort. He’s read about it so many times, in all the most romantic books. How hard could it be?

Everything maniacalmole has written is brilliant, funny, whimsical, and so in character, but this one is my favorite. 

Habitual by goingsparebutwithprecision (4k)

Summary: In which Crowley wears lipstick and Aziraphale is flustered.

The mutability of angelic/demonic gender and sexual presentation is one of my favorite things about these characters and about writing for them, and this fic is one of the first I read that got me really thinking about it. 

Guests On Memory Lane by Holoxam (5k)

Summary: “Whatever you go around telling yourself, angel,” Crowley said over his morning-coffee, “some of us have to work for a living. The girls and I can get into some shenanigans around the shops, you know.”Aziraphale looked up from his Telegraph, and sent Crowley a wary glance. He was torn between asking Crowley if he remembered his fruitless attempts at influencing the presumed antichrist back in the 1980’s, and sternly telling him off for even thinking about attempting to corrupt humans at such a young age.The Dynamic Duo babysit Anathema’s cousins for the weekend.

Crowley and Aziraphale being friends with Anathema? Yes, please. Crowley and Aziraphale taking care of children? Yes, please. 

Teen

Five Times Crowley Wanted Aziraphale by Mitsuhachi (3k)

Summary: Wanting and wanting and wanting, in many ways over many years.

This and it’s sequel, Five Times Aziraphale Wanted Crowley (The One More Night Remix) (rated M, mind the tags) are one of my favorite fics in this fandom. I love historical stuff especially that traces Aziraphale and Crowley’s relationship over vast tracks of time and this delivers on that in a huge way. 

here i am, leaving you clues by Lvslie (10k) 

Summary: It’s all the same burning bookshop, and I’m always inside shouting your name. 

[Aziraphale is recalled to Heaven, but leaving proves more difficult than anticipated. Written for the tumblr prompt: ‘Actually….I just miss you.’]

Another one that I just adore. This fic is poetry in all the best ways and I think about the summary line, “it’s always the same burning bookshop”, pretty much every day of my life. There isn’t a plot as such (or if there is I’ve forgotten it because I am mostly just focused on how beautifully written it is) but I highly recommend it anyway. 

Everything Leslie has written for this fandom is like this, actually, beautiful and poetic and sort of dream-like. 

Modern Love by punkfaery (7k) 

(I podficced this last year)

Summary: “The crux of it, Crowley decided, was that demons were not supposed to want.

Or – well, that wasn’t strictly true. Certain things, such as material wealth and the corruption of innocents and the eventual triumph of Hell over Heaven, and possibly Earth as well, were perfectly all right. The fact that he didn’t particularly care about any of these things just served to add a little extra salt to the wound.

It wasn’t a question of wanting. It was a question of wanting the wrong things.”

Crowley, Aziraphale, and a series of religious buildings.

No Pain, No…Loss? by NotASpaceAlien (7k)

Summary: Aziraphale has a horrifying realization and decides he needs to lose weight.

This is so goddamn funny. I love Aziraphale with all my heart but he is very foolish sometimes and this fic… is such a good instance of that. 

There’s No Pancake Too Big For My Heavenly Father To Flip by dwarvenbeardspores (6k)

Summary: After a few exceptionally busy months, the forces of Heaven and Hell attempt to outwit each other in Aziraphale’s kitchen.

That is, Aziraphale makes pancakes and Crowley eats them.

I love cooking, and cooking headcanons, and Aziraphale and Crowley cooking for each other. This fic is delicious. 

Read everything by this author, actually, everything they’ve written is wonderful. 

Mature

Goodbody by copperbadge (3k)

Summary: Aziraphael’s new body is causing some problems.

Again, I love a good exploration of the relationship between angels and demons and their bodies and this fic is so much fun on that count. 

Only Human by abstractconcept (9k)

Summary: Aziraphale loses his job. Humor/romance A/C

Fics exploring the fallout of Aziraphale and Crowley’s disobedience towards their bosses in trying to avert the apocalypse is definitely A Fic Type in this fandom and this one goes the route of “one of them is fired and turned into a human”. It even takes a humorous angle on this and not the obvious angst route. 

Explicit

fires of the flesh, both literal and figurative by mercuryhatter (3k)

Summary: Pretty standard “there’s a sex curse and Crowley has to have way too many orgasms or be discorporated” stuff.

Genderfluidity/trans Crowley!! Discussion of feelings!! Fuck or die!! What’s not to love? I really love this fic. 

No Cause for Alarm Clocks by HJ Bender (archived by the GO_Library_archivist) (2k)

Summary: A short story detailing one of Crowley’s infernal household gadgetries, and why he’ll never have sex in front of it ever again.

This is wild and funny and I have read it about thirty times. 

Figurative Language by alamorn (2k)

Summary: It’s two years after the apocalypse that wasn’t and the only thing that’s changed is Aziraphale’s dick. That is to say, he has one now.

A Classic. I have read this probably thirty times, as well. 

Rarefied Air by Vulgarweed (4k)

Summary: Earth is getting older, news is getting worse, and an angel has to go to extreme heights to get any peace and quiet at all. But as close as you can get to Heaven, you’re still never far from Hell. (Hell hasn’t frozen. Crowley nearly has.) Giftfic for Allthisnonsense in 2006 GO Holiday exchange. 

This is another author who has written a lot of really good stuff but this one is my favorite. 

And here is my ao3 as well, I’ve written a lot of GO fic in the last year. Here are some of the ones I’m most proud of. 

Where a Heart Would Fit Perfectly (Teen, 2k)

Summary: Aziraphale shrugged and gestured for Crowley to sit down, “I’ve come back from the battlefield; no need for all that muscle anymore.”

“You’ve gone a bit in the other direction, though, haven’t you?” Crowley said conversationally as he took a seat and flagged someone down for a drink. “You’re a bit… pudgy.”

In 600 BCE Assyria, two man-shaped beings meet up after a long absence.

Nothing Like The Sun (Teen, 6k)

Summary: One tended to go through a number bodies in six thousand years, even if one was as cautious or sturdy as Aziraphale. Crowley, who was neither cautious nor sturdy, had gone through a large number. He’d changed appearance so many times that in Aziraphale’s memory he was often just his eyes, for no matter if Crowley was tall or short, lithe or stocky, blond or raven-haired, his eyes stayed the same.

Touch Me Gently (Explicit, 2k)

Summary: Aziraphale had started manicuring his nails.

Yours, Truly (General, 3k)

Summary: A love in selected letters.

Snapshots (General, 2k)

Summary: Five photographs on the wall of Aziraphale’s shop. An expansion of a headcanon I posted on tumblr.

And that’s about what I got! Happy reading, anon.