#they just popped right up from the sand PLEASE stop let me collect bugs in peace i beg

[lvllns]

oh fun so not only are there giant tigers that want to eat me in sumeru, there are also now giant scorpions which will ERUPT FROM THE EARTH

[beskarberry]

Silver and Steel

Bargaining with Beskar, Chapter 2 (The Mandalorian x f!reader)

It was then you noticed the open wall next to you. The steel panel was slid open to reveal a vault packed corner to corner with more firepower than you had ever seen in one place. Your eyes roamed from blaster to rifle to flamethrower, noticing that not all of them were made for five fingered hands. This wasn't just an armory, it was a trophy case.

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 7.5k

Content warnings: ALOT. Descriptions of violence (a little spicier than canon) blood mention, near death experiences, hurt/COMFORT, fluff, smut exhaustion sex, top!reader.

A/N: I hope y’all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it but yeah PLEASE READ THOSE CONTENT WARNINGS!! It all works out ok in the end! Also good chunks of this was inspired by a particular filk song called Call the Navigator which I’ll link in the replies so the external link doesn’t ef up my post.

<-Previous Next->

"Med pack... junk....junk....spotchka?....is that all you've got?"

You were bent over a deep supply crate, your legs barely touching the ground while you dug through what you had hoped would be the food stock. There were several banged up tins of rations and a handful of miscellaneous junk, but nothing that looked real food. You were clean and dry after your shower, but the energy that had been spent in this very supply room just an hour or so earlier had to be replenished. "Where’s the rest of it?"

The silence coming from the cockpit was expected, but still frustrating. With a huff you grabbed two food tins and made your way through the old ship towards the ladder. At the top though a small antechamber you found your new comrade seated in the pilot chair, fussing with the buttons on the console. On either side and slightly behind his chair were two other passenger seats, though the one on his left was missing a good deal of padding. The cockpit was poorly lit save for the lighted console and the dusty starlight overhead. Though you were in the air, you could tell you were still on Tatooine. Hooray. Why are we still here? The great Dune Sea stretched out on all sides, sparsely dotted with sand people villages, but you couldn’t see any of the large space ports such as Mos Eisley or Mos Espa. In the ships’ darkness you couldn't tell what the lumpy thing was in the other chair, probably blankets or laundry. You went to toss it off the seat when a pair of huge black orbs peeped out from the heap of fabric.

"The fuck is THAT?!" You rocketed backwards, dropping the food tins in the process. The bug eyed creature made a soft cooing noise and lifted the rest of the blanket off itself, allowing two gigantic green ears to pop into view. It didn't look like a threat, in fact it looked kinda cute, but you knew it could still be dangerous. A pair of stubby three-fingered hands made grabby motions at you, the little creature giggling at your bewildered face. " Where'd you find this thing, is it some kind of pet?"

"He's not a pet." Finished fiddling with the console, Mando turned in his chair to readjust the blanket that had slumped off of the small beastie. It squealed happily and wiggled in its comfy cocoon before noticing the food tins that were still on the floor. He pointed the tiniest claw at them and chirped at you, demanding to be fed. "You'd better give him one of those before he gets mad."

It took you a moment to process what he said before scooping one of the tins off the floor, peeling back the lid and placing the dish in the seat next to the little thing. He greedily scooped the mystery mash into his tiny toothy mouth, gibbering between bites. You picked the remaining tin off the floor and leaned against the door frame, watching it happily chow down.

"If it's not a pet then what is it?"

"He's my..." the Mandalorian paused, fishing for the right words to say, "...he is my child."

That was not at all the answer you expected, if he had said emotional support gremlin you would have been less confused. The baby was still making a mess of his dinner, almost dropping his plate before Mando snatched it and set it carefully back in his lap. You had seen first hand that there was a human under all that metal plating, and your tired brain fizzled trying to make the connection between the two very different beings. Mando could tell by your puzzled face that he had some explaining to do.

He told you the tale of how he had been charged to bring the baby in as a high credit bounty, but after he used the reward to get new armor he went back and stole the child away from its captors. He talked about the Mandalorian concept of a 'foundling' and that he himself was one too. At some point you had popped your food tin open and started eating, though you were so captivated by his story that you couldn't remember doing so. When he'd finished you set your empty dish on the busted chair and gently held your hand out for the child to grab with one mush covered paw, who babbled excitedly at his new friend.

Behind you his parental guardian was rigid, ready to take you out if you made one wrong move against his precious cargo. Though he had been the one to steal you away and forgo freezing you in carbonite he still didn’t exactly trust you, your reputation as a hunter-killer was what had driven your bounty so high. He knew you were disarmed, but what else could you be capable of? However, you weren't paying mama-hen Mando any mind. Instead you let the baby play with your hand a bit before he returned to his food. You decided that the only place left to sit was on the floor. Squished into the tiny space between the passenger and pilot seats was cramped, but it gave you a fantastic view out the rounded transperisteel window into the vastness of the night sky.

“Your story sounds awful familiar.” You turned your attention to the metal clad man, watching him fidget with the steering controls. “You abandoned a guild reward for anothers wellbeing, like I did. Someone that didn’t deserve to be dragged back in cuffs. Is that why you picked up the puck on me? Some kind of kindred spirit something or other?”

“We’re nothing alike.” He was watching out the window, focused on flying the ship to unknown destinations, but he was bouncing the leg farthest away from you. So when the cogwheels turn in your head, the machine moves somewhere else. If you hadn’t experienced his human body first hand you could have easily convinced yourself he was a droid.

“Now that’s not true. You told the guild to get fucked because your moral compass was pointing the other way. I didn't just let that quarry go y'know? It was more than that. There was... there was someone she had to get back to. And the New Republic was just gonna lock her ass up and for what? It wasn't right." You remembered that Togruta woman, pointing a blaster at you with tears in her eyes and her belly swollen with a child that did not belong to the man she was being forced to marry. A few thousand credits weren’t worth another child being made an orphan, and you gave her your ship to escape in while you led hunters on a wild-bantha chase away from her. You knew it drove the guild insane but you wouldn’t have it any other way. A tiny green foot poked itself out from under the blankets by your head, bringing you out of your reverie. On reflex you tucked it back into the safety of his blankies.

Though you thankfully didn’t remember much of your early childhood, you knew you had come from Corellia. You didn’t know if you had parents or siblings, but there had been many other young street urchins in your alley behind the shipyard, and all you had then were each other. You never planned on having any kids yourself, but they were still something to be protected. At all costs, if necessary. “I’m guessing this little dude is happy with that decision.”

Mando had begun to take the ship closer to the ground, it was almost totally dark outside but you could see on the radar there was a large mountainous formation up ahead. Carefully, he landed the beat up craft on a sturdy outcropping of rocks, kicking up whirlwinds of dust and sand. Far out over the sand you could see a collection of lumpy looking ruins that were slowly succumbing to the march of the dunes. You guessed this was where your quarry was hiding out.

The baby was starting to get sleepy, his huge eyes disappearing slowly as the weight of his eyelids became too much. His little head rolled forward, threatening to toss him off his seat. Your big mean bounty hunter heart couldn’t take it, so you scrambled to your feet and scooped the baby up in your arms, sitting down in his seat to get him situated in your lap. He fussed and squirmed a bit, but you had learned a no-fail trick from the Corellian ship builders that would often help to sneak orphaned children onto their ships and off that skughole of a planet towards a better life. Many years ago they had done the same for you.

“Oh, I have sailed the midnight sea from Hoth to Arvala-5.

Seen the Cloudshape Falls of Alderaan, met rocks that were alive.

But soon I came to realize as world to world I roamed,

That nowhere in the galaxy could really be my home.”

The songs you knew were often sang by whole crews of starship sailors, loud enough to shake their durasteel walls, but you dropped your voice low and soft to turn the star-shanty into a lullaby. The baby was watching you with glittering eyes, he had stopped his wiggling and curled up tightly against your chest.

“So call the navigator, set the course and go!

We've stars and planets to explore, my wild heart tells me so.

Beneath the metal decking I can hear the engine sigh

And all I need is a mighty ship and a staaaa-aarr to guide her by”

A tiny yawn betrayed his wondrous eyes, and he gave up and closed them shut, rubbing his little hands on his face. You lowered your voice to almost a whisper.

“I've seen a million beauties and I've known a million fears,

And life is what I've found between the laughter and the tears.

Still I will sail the last frontier through worlds both tame and wild,

And marvel at their strangeness with the wonder of a child”

Soft snores were your only applause, the baby having drifted off mid stanza. You hummed a few more lines of the song to be sure he was asleep. The cockpit was as dark as the surrounding sky, but the glint of silver caught your attention. Starlight reflected off the beskar plates in a way that made the black of his visor seem darker than the heart of a collapsed star, and just as deadly. The Mandalorian was watching you intently, completely motionless.

The precious moment with the baby had made you very forgetful of the dangerous situation you were actually in. You had been captured, you were this man’s prisoner and yet here you were all cozy in the chair with his adopted son in your lap. You glared back at him, matching his fierce gaze when the little green bundle moved to get more comfortable, one tiny hand catching claws in the top you were wearing; a tunic that did not belong to you.

“Here, you take him then.” Your voice was hushed so as not to wake the child, and you raised him up gently to try and unhook him from your shirt. Immediately there were two gloved hands coming to lift the baby off of your lap. He was a monolith of leather and metal, but the way he pulled his son in close was so gentle that all the ferocity of his profession dissipated like mist. Mando carefully tucked the blanket under the sleeping little baby and wrapped him up tight before slowly turning away from you and the flight deck to head down the ladder in total silence, leaving you alone in the dark.

You watched him go, the top of his shiny silver head disappearing into the floor. Without the sounds of life in the cockpit the quiet of the night weighed heavy on your ears. He still hadn’t told you why he had kept you out of the carbonite, all you had done was let him use you as his personal play-thing... and maybe murder off some of his bounty hunting competition, but that wasn’t much to go off of. You had done worse for much less. Put your skills to better use, that’s what he had said. Absently you toyed with the end of your sleeve, no, not your sleeve. His sleeve.

That was another thing, what reason did he have to show you hospitality when his first interaction with you had been so violent? Binding you and marching your ass through the desert after he had fucking shot you. Your escape plan had almost worked, ha! All you would’ve had to do is tire him out and run but that had backfired entirely. The apex of your thighs still thrummed with sensation, warm and blissful. Though you’d had lovers in the past you usually didn’t still feel them so deeply afterwards. The smell of the fresher soap still clung to your body and clothes. Clutching at the collar of your sweater you pulled it to your face and breathed deep, letting the heady scent of it fill your lungs.

“Let’s go. We have work to do.” The modulated voice coming from the ladder startled you from your guilty indulgence and sprang you to your feet, but the source of the voice was already back down the ladder. You sheepishly followed suit.

“You plan on telling me what we’re up to exactly?” Down below the Mandalorian was loading himself with ammunition, each and every slot on his many bandoliers was packed to the brim with charges. His pulse rifle was slung over one shoulder, clanking up against a new piece of equipment you hadn’t seen before. Some kind of jet pack maybe.

“I have two bounties to catch on Tatooine. One of them conveniently fell into a sarlacc pit. The other one's hiding out down there." A bounty fob blinked red in his hand; quick flashes indicated that the target was close by. “If you help me with this, you’re off the hook. I’ll tell Karga you’re dead and the guild will stop sending hunters after you. But-” He turned to face you, he was holding your beat-up old back pack by one ratty leather strap. "If for one second I think you'll turn against me, I'll take the half credits for your corpse."

"You're one to talk!" You hissed, storming up to the gunslinger with the ferocity of a lothcat. "You kidnapped me! I didn't ask to be here."

The man in question didn't budge under your verbal assault. "Do we have a deal or not?"

He forced your backpack into your arms to accentuate his point. You ripped it from his grasp and stormed to the other side of the cabin. Everything was still inside; a pack of bacta patches, a few mementos, three busted tracking fobs and some blaster charges. Speaking of blaster-

"Where’s my gun, Mando?" Your question was answered when you turned back to face him. He was holding it by its barrel, extending the grip towards you. You met his visor with contempt, but took the old blaster from him carefully as not to cause a misfire. It would be nice to not be on the run from a guild you had pledged your loyal services to for so many years, that now wanted you delivered back to them in carbonite; and you knew that Karga would trust his favorite hunter. The life of a moisture farmer wasn’t what you dreamed of when you escaped Corellia. Fuck that. "Yeah, it's a deal. One hunt and I'm gone."

It was then you noticed the open wall next to you. The steel panel was slid open to reveal a vault packed corner to corner with more firepower than you had ever seen in one place. Your eyes roamed from blaster to rifle to flamethrower, noticing that not all of them were made for five fingered hands. This wasn't just an armory, it was a trophy case.

If he didn't want you to ogle his wares he should have closed the panel, but instead he joined you at the wall, picking up some extra plasma cartridges and a vibroblade with a curved handle, which he pushed into your hands. "Will that be enough?"

Either you trust me or you don't, pick a side, tin can. You didn't answer him right away, opting to pull a chest holster and another couple of blasters down from the wall. You cinched the holsters tight and tucked a blaster in on either side, slung a disruptor over your back and stuffed the knife in your boot. Once you had everything in place you stuck your fists on your hips like a superhero with a confidant nod. "Yeah, that should be good."

Mando was watching you with intensity, his visor going over each of your weapon choices. He tugged on your holsters’ cross straps to make sure they were secured. You rolled your eyes at him, "I know how to dress myself, sir."

No answer. Typical. He stopped fussing with your straps and turned back to the wall, selecting a heavy multi-ammo bandolier. He stepped closer to you, wrapping both arms around your waist to fit the belt in place on your hips. You tried to convince yourself that it was the cool beskar of his chest plate pressed up against you that sent a shiver down your spine. The physical contact was over as quickly as it had been initiated, and then he was back in the vault fishing out the tiny silver explosives that fit neatly into the circular latches on either side of your belt, handing them to you without a word. Finished with his selection he pressed a few buttons on his vambrace, one to slide the armory shut and another to summon an egg-shaped hover crib to float to his side. Inside its shell the child was sound asleep, a heart-melting smile on his tiny little face. As adorable as he was, you furrowed your brow in confusion.

“Is he coming too?”

“Where I go, he goes.” Mando said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He strode back to the supply crate you had been digging through earlier and packed a handful of rations into a bag for the journey through the dunes. Cool desert air gusted into the stuffy cabin as the access ramp fell open, and the three of you headed out into the darkness of Tatooine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your dreams were hazy and feverish, shots of blaster fire flickered through the fog from unknown assailants. The smell of blood and blast plasma strong in your nose even while unconscious. You saw the sneering face of a Twi’lek twist in agony and purple blood painted his face before he winked out of existence, replaced in your mindscape with bloody hands. Your hands. Then there was cold beskar on your cheek and strong arms hauling you from the carnage. Harsh wind in your ears and the ground spiraling away beneath you. The howling wind so loud you couldn't hear the questions being barked in your face. Pain, the smell of burning skin, then nothing. You felt objects moving frantically nearby, and something soft and green was pressing into your ribs. Your eyes, heavy as they were, fluttered open to see two huge black orbs staring up from your side where bright red blood was staining the sheets under you. Is that ... my blood?

“Hey green bean...what’cha up to?” Your voice was hoarse and weak, scratching its way out reluctantly past chapped lips. Talking made your head pound, you reached up to cradle your aching skull when two leather tipped hands caught yours and held them steady.

“Easy... Don’t move too much. Please.” Your hands were gently set back down at your sides, shooting pain up your arms. A large black and silver body was hunched beside you, frantically sticking bacta patches to your skin.

“Mand...do? What…what happened?” Your voice was barely a whisper, so faint the recycled air of the cabin threatened to whisk it away.

“You got the bastard, but that fucking Twi' managed to get a shot off in your gut point blank before he went down. You shouldn't have survived that but you did.” Is that a compliment? He was wrapping a long gauze bandage around your arm, fixing the bacta patches in place so they could do their thing. It hurt, but not as much as you thought it should have. Down by your side the child had rolled into you face first, passed out cold next to an emergency cauterizer. Mando nodded at his sleeping son, “And if it wasn’t for him, you’d be dead for sure.” 

The baby? How is he involved with this? Thoughts echoed loudly in your skull, and you decided that thinky time was over. The little guy had the right idea, you should sleep now, embrace the comfort of the dark behind your eyes, let it swallow you whole.

“Hey hey hey! Not yet. Stay with me, ok? You need to drink something. Here.” An armored hand slid under your head, urging you to sit up just enough to take a drink out of the metal canteen pressed against your lips. “You need to stay awake, just for a little while.” Cool water graced your dry mouth and dripped onto your chin. Embarrassed by your mess you tried to wipe the droplets away but once again your arms were halted in place. A rough piece of fabric dabbed at your face.

“I’m not a baby, Mando. I can take care of myself.” The creeping sting of blast-burn that still scalded your skin told you that might not be true. The bacta was just starting to seep into your bloodstream, but it would take some time to work its magic.

“I know that. I was with you down there in the fray. A rancor would have been less terrifying to face than you. But right now I need you to hold still.”

Another compliment? Or was that sarcasm? You’re losing your edge, tin man. You tried to roll your eyes but the effort made your head spin; you glanced around the cabin, trying to avoid meeting the visor that was pinning you to the cot. Strewn about the floor of the ship was what was left of your holsters and weapons, splattered with red and purple blood. You couldn’t be sure, but it looked like one belt had been blasted to smithereens, torn strips of leather the only indication it had been there at all. Farther away you saw a dark block in the carbonite freezer. The Twi’lek from your nightmare was frozen solid, though from his limp posture you guessed he had stopped moving long before he was put in the chamber. One of his long lekku had been cut clean off, and even in carbonite you could see the wound was fresh. Something long and curved stuck victoriously out of the center of his chest. Your vibroblade, lodged to the hilt in his sternum.

Mando was still kneeling on the floor by your side, and though you couldn’t see his face his hunched shoulders gave you the feeling that he was distraught. He still had your head resting in his palm, his thumb absently toying with your hair. Maybe it was the bacta running through your system that made you start to feel warm and gooey on the inside, but the sensation of his hand on your scalp felt... nice. Nice to be touched in a way that wasn't just for survival. Though you had already felt his hands on your body this was something else entirely. Sincere. Maybe it was just the first time somebody near you wasn't trying to kill or capture you. You foolish girl, you've already been captured. Are you so lonely that a gentle touch makes you melt? Maybe it's you that's losing your edge.

"You should have left me for dead, cashed in on that half credit reward."

"That is not The Way." His mantra was rehearsed, spoken as easily as he drew breath, but you could hear the exhaustion in his voice.

“Well... thank you for not letting me bleed out.” You could see the top of the baby's green little noggin still curled up against your side, though the part of your ribs he was leaning on didn’t have a single mark. You looked for the blast wound that Mando was supposedly talking about, but aside from a handful of plasma burns your skin was smooth and healthy; the pool of dried blood under you was the only indication anything had been there at all. What kind of mando magic is that? And what did he mean about the child? Your first thought was how disappointed you were there wouldn’t be a good scar. Your second was realizing your top was missing. Shreds of it were still on your shoulders, but the front had been ripped off completely to get to your vanished wounds. Mando seemed like he didn’t even care, he had been so focused on patching you up that the idea of modesty was thrown out the window, but you couldn’t help teasing him. “There’s not a scratch on me, Mando. You just wanted me topless, didn’t you?”

His thumb on your scalp froze, his visor going from your face to your chest with rapid snaps. Without letting your head drop he used his other hand to tear his cloak from his back and throw it over you and the sleeping baby. “Better?”

Party pooper. “Yes, thank you.” Why is he being so nice? He must have ulterior motives, right? Why keep me alive if not to cash in on that bounty? You decided to push his buttons some more. “This bed sucks. Is this why you're so crotchety? Because you sleep on this Maker-forsaken thing? It’s making my back hurt.”

The cot you were on was spartan at best, more of a cloth covered bucket than a bed. It was recessed into the wall opposite of the armory, bits of machinery and droid parts hanging over the space above you. There wasn’t much of a gap between your head and the durasteel plating of the ship’s hull. Your teasing was rewarded with a long, tired sigh. The hand that cushioned your head moved down to your shoulders, pushing on you so that you sat up straight. You scooped the baby off of your side and into your arms, trying to ignore the dried blood from your wounds that stained the sheets before swaddling the sleeping bean in his father’s cloak. The metal man rose from the floor, letting go of you just long enough to remove his cross-belts and unlatch his chest plate, setting them on the floor with a dull thunk. He squished himself between the wall and your back, his dorsal plate scraping loudly without its cape. He scooched one armored leg around you until it was between your hip and the wall on your side, pulling you into his lap and turning his whole body into a pillow, letting your torso rest on his. He was used to the sharp metal bed frame, but that didn’t mean you should be subjected to it.

“Is this ok?”

You could only nod, your cheeks flushing red with a mix of emotions. It was more than ok, his formidable body was warm and comfortable. His arms wrapped around your waist, helping to support not only you but also his foundling. The spice of him was strong now with him on your back, worn leather and metal and that damn fresher soap that was making a fool out of you. Underneath his steady breathing the sound of something rhythmic caught your attention, it was quick and faint, but unmistakably the sound of his heartbeat. His heart is racing. Listen to that engine purr.

Behind you a man with a name you may never know watched your chest slowly rise and fall with each breath, not with lust but something unfamiliar though not unwelcome. He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears, whether from the ordeal of keeping you alive or the fact that you were in his arms again he couldn't be sure. He sighed, trying to convince himself to calm down, but the deep breath he took only flooded his senses with the essence of you, threatening to melt the beskar off his head with the heat rushing to his face. He couldn't help the way his fingers traced over your skin, careful not to undo any of the bacta patches. He jumped slightly when your hands found his, but the weight of the child still in your arms made it difficult to reach your fingers. The glove you were touching was suddenly empty, and a bare hand snaked out from under the cloak that kept you modest. With the press of a button the child’s pram floated its way over to you from the supply crates. The baby’s adopted father carefully lifted the sleeping creature off your lap and into his hover crib, another button press on the vambrace and the shield door slid closed.

His hand returned to the safety of the cloak, pulling the other glove off before finding your fingers again. His skin was so warm you couldn't help but imagine his hands somewhere more intimate. Evil, evil bacta... Maybe you wouldn't have to.

"I should thank you properly." It was impossible to hide the tiredness of your voice, but he was close enough you only needed to whisper. His grasp tightened around you, your once plush pillow was now a rigid wall of muscle.

"You should go to sleep." the sound of his baritone words so close to your ear made your skin prickle. Too late for that. Slowly you guided his hand down your belly until your tangled hands bumped into your belt line. A low growl rumbled out of the modulator.  “Cyar'ika... you need to rest."

The alien term of endearment made you hum, but you ignored his words of warning and pushed his hand under the tough fabric till his fingertips found your heat, both of you gasping softly at first contact. His free hand fumbled with your button, and after some difficulty you undid it for him along with the zipper. With space to work, with his wrist moved freely, lazily rolling a calloused fingertip against your clit; remembering his lesson from the first time he experienced your body, his touch was light as a feather.

There wasn’t much you could do for him in the position you were in, so you leaned back against him and relaxed, letting him enjoy you at his own pace. The bottom of his helmet was pressed into the crook of your neck, and though it was sharp you could feel something warm and soft underneath it. So there is a real man under there. Scruffy stubble brushed at your skin and sent goosebumps down your chest. Under the beskar his eyes followed the prickling trail that lead under the tattered cloak you still wore to your breasts, watching the way the fabric pointed where your nipples grew hard for him. His other hand couldn’t resist finding its way to your pert peaks, rolling them between his fingers in that way he knew flushed you with heat. Soft gasps rewarded his ears as he worked at your breast and clit, rubbing them in tandem. Your hips rolled into one hand and your back arched into the other, urging him to help you build your climax. He obliged, adding a second finger to pinch your clit softly between strong digits until you fell apart around him.

The pressure that was building behind you and pressing into your spine told you that if you wanted more from him you would have to give him a better angle. You started to get up, but the hands on your sensitive spots held you in place.

“What about your injuries? I don’t want to hurt you.” What injuries? There’s nothing left! His voice was filled with sincerity, a far cry from your first encounter. You didn’t answer him, instead you found each of his hands and squeezed them with a hum, asking him to trust that the bacta had set in and made you comfortable enough to move from your impromptu med bay. He slid his fingers out from your burning core, dragging the wetness from your cunt over your skin until his palms were on your back, helping to push you up off of him. The teeny tiny bed frame made it difficult to spin yourself around until you were facing him, and even more difficult to kick your pants off as you passed over top of him, but he never took his hands away from you to keep you steady until you were seated in his lap.

Straddling his waist you rolled your hips over where his cock was hidden from you, making him shudder under your legs. His arms glided from your knees to your hips, languidly making their way up your sides and past your breasts to the last remaining tatters of the black knit sweater he had allowed you to wear. Hooking a thumb under its ruined edges, he slid it up over your arms and cast it away into the darkness of the ship. His hands went right back to working at your breasts, massaging them like dough in time with your grinding hips. You took a moment to admire how he looked underneath you, his remaining armor glinting in the hazy ship light as his hands searched for every sensitive inch of your chest. You knew from legend that his helmet could never be removed in front of you, but you’d never heard anything about the rest of his clothes. Where his chest plate had been was a strappy flak jacket dotted with magnetic fasteners. Your hands went slowly to the first clasp, and the hands that were so indulged in you froze, his body stiff between your legs.

“Is this ok?” The irony of you repeating his question from earlier back to him made your lips turn in a sly smile. 

“Y-yes.” His voice was nearly imperceptible, and you realized that he was shaking. You looked to his visor, watching him nod in consent before you continued. He dropped his hands to your hips, pulling down on your thighs and rutting up into you while you busied yourself with the complicated under armor until it fell away at his sides, revealing a pair of suspenders and an identical black knit tunic as the one that had been shredded off of you. You didn’t have the energy to peel every article of clothing off of him, so this would have to do. Without his cloak bunched around his shoulders you were able to see the flesh of his throat, so warm and inviting that you wanted to sink your teeth into it.

You bent down to nibble at the exposed skin, and the filthy moan that rattled out of the helmet sent shivers down your spine. The taste of him was exquisite, better than you could have imagined under all that fabric and leather. The overwhelming cocktail of his scent straight from the source made you bold. You kissed your way around the edge of his helmet where the metal met his skin until you found his pulse point and made good on your desires. His body convulsed when you bit down, sucking at the tender skin until you left blooming marks that would be there for days.

“Cyar'ika... Please...“ There was that word again, you didn’t know what it meant but the way he breathed it like a prayer felt like warm honey in your belly. Releasing his tormented neck you ran your hands down his broad chest until your thumbs bumped the leather suspenders that lead you down to his waist line where you were able to tug the edge of his shirt free, giving you a delicious window of his tummy; well-muscled and dusted with dark brown hair. 

“What’s wrong, tin man? Nobody ever touch you like this before?” He was still shaking while you ran your hands under the edge of his shirt and through the soft treasure trail of fuzz from the top of his belt line to the bottom of his ribs. He couldn’t answer you, his breath caught in his throat at the sensation of your hands on his skin, but you were starting to put the pieces of his puzzle together. No, probably not.

You decided not to torture him any longer. The fabric of his pants was nearly stretched to capacity and wet with your slick. You had to stretch one leg out onto the floor to get enough of a footing to lift yourself high enough off him that you could free him from the canvas prison. His cock nearly burst out of its confines, and your face flushed red at the sight of him standing proudly at attention, twitching in your hands with a flood of shimmering precum made just for you.

His chest was heaving, ragged breaths forcing their way out of his modulator before you’d even taken his length. You used your hips to notch him at your entrance and his grip on your thighs clenched like a steel trap. Slowly you lowered yourself onto him, letting him fill you until you were stretched wide. Your eyes met his visor, though from the way it was tilted you knew he was watching himself disappear into you. His arms wrapped tightly under your ass as he thrust into you hard enough that he lifted you off the cot, quickly scooting both your bodies down the bed until he was flat on his back. You tried to stay upright, but his pounding soon had your head spinning until you were falling forward into his chest, digging your arms around his shoulders in a way you were becoming familiar with. Your hands found their way to the back of his helmet to where his hair line started, sneaking a few fingers under the metal edge to tangle in his curls. The Mandalorian’s hands were on your waist, holding you in place while he rocketed up into you, filling the ships cabin with the sound of wet slaps. His thick cock hit different from this angle, grinding up against the sweet spot deep inside you with each rut until you started seeing stars behind your eyes. He could feel you building up around him and he quickened his pace until you were gasping his name.

“M-mando! I... I’m gonna....” Your muscles coiled with heat until you burst, your sweet cunt fluttering around his still pumping cock until he went cascading over the edge of ecstasy with you, his helmet vibrating with a guttural roar. His feverish body shook, giving you a few short thrusts to milk the cum from his cock until it spilled out from where he was lost inside you.

His shaky arms held onto you so tightly, as if you would blast away into space if he let go. The endorphins flooding his head made him want to pour his heart out and tell you everything, bare himself in body and soul for the first time in his life. He wanted to tell you how nice you had looked in his clothes, how the loose knit fabric draped over your breasts was a work of art; even more so when you were standing before him armed to the teeth in his hunting trophies. How seeing you slice that fucking Twi’lek to ribbons was more graceful than any ballet. The sight of the bloody hole that had been burned into your side had made his skin crawl. Mando wasn’t ready to explain the child’s healing powers, he barely understood them himself; but if it wasn’t for the baby he would have been burying your corpse instead of tending your wounds. Instead of experiencing your living body like he was now.

His heart fluttered at the thought of his foundling healing you with his baby sorcerer magic, his tiny green paws pushed on your side where the blood was spilling from your wound. The thought of you dying for his bounty made him sick, but pride flushed the sensation away when he thought back to that first day with you up in the flight deck. How when his baby boy was restless that you acted, not with malice but with tenderness and care. He'd never wanted to rip his helmet off faster in all his days than when you sang his son a lullaby, the sweet tune of it filtering through his sensory equipment, and he longed to hear it as it was meant to be. In that moment he had been entranced, but the fierce glare of his visor had made you feel threatened. He didn't want that. He wanted to make you feel safe. The same way you had made his child feel, the same way you made him feel now. Like the galaxy itself couldn’t tear you from him.

But the ugly truth was that soon it would all end when you both went your separate ways. All the feelings he wanted to confess to you died in his mouth, leaving a bitter taste that brought him back to reality. You still straddled his waist, and though the blood had long since left his cock it still sat neatly in your heat, letting him feel your gentle heartbeat around him. Carefully he pulled himself free from the apex of your thighs and rolled you both sideways onto the unforgiving cot, letting gravity shuffle you down until you were nestled in the crook of his arm. He couldn’t help brushing a stray lock of hair from your face, meeting your half lidded eyes with his own behind the visor.

“I don’t think I can get to the fresher this time.” Your voice was barely a whisper, and the edges of sleep crept unbidden to your eyes; the traumatic activities of the day finally winning over your endurance. “You’re probably going to have to burn these sheets.”

Mando hummed with indifference, though for you he would burn all of Tatooine down if you asked. All the lovely thoughts that had danced through his mind came rolling through again, haloed in the warm light of afterglow. Only one made its way past his lips, sneaking out of the helmets’ modulator like a prayer.

“How does the song end?”

“Mmm?” You were so close to sleep, so cozy and full of cum that you knew would be a fun mess for morning-you to clean up. You wracked your brain trying to remember what the hell he was talking about. The star-shanty? “Why, do you need a lullaby too?”

“N-no. Just curious. When you leave, my foundling might ask me about it.” Liar. The calloused hand gliding up and down your spine brought the original contract you made with him ringing through your skull. One hunt and I’m gone.

“Leave? I’m not going anywhere until I see you tell Karga face to face that I’m rotting in a sarlacc pit. No take-backs. That old dog will probably dance when he hears he won’t have to part with his credits and I want to catch it on holo-corder.”

The rumbling sigh deep in his chest sounded more like an engine powering down than a mortal man, and it told you more than words ever could. The arm you had around his chest was met with strong fingers that intertwined with your own. He doesn’t want me to go. Who are you, Mandalorian?

“Tell me anyway? Please?” His arms tightened like a fortress around you. His words were distant, echoing out from somewhere in dreamland instead of right by your ear. Alright you big softie, if you’re going to beg me. You sighed heavily against him, trying to recall the songs of your distant past. 

“The nights are long between the stars, and lonely too for me,

I wonder how I might have fared with home and family.

But the bonds of friendship I have formed will last my lifetime through,

Security is not for me, my dreams are all of you.”

The same soft snores that had been your original encore with the baby now ghosted in your ear, muffled by the mysterious beskar helmet but still unmistakable. Like father like son. 

The weight of his arms around you was like nothing you had ever felt in your years on the run. You had traveled so far and met so many living beings but not once had you let another share your bed while you slept. You could get used to this. The thought was the last you had before sleep overtook you, your body slumping against his while you dreamed of silver and steel.

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@mandoinevarro​ @mrsparknuts​ @cookiejuicedesu​

[junghoseokwife]

Merfolk in a Manhole 2

Merman! Yoongi, Merman! Seokjin, Merman! Jungkook, Merman! Jimin, Merman! Taehyung, Human! Namjoon, Human! Hoseok Human! Reader Summary: After getting kicked out of your apartment, you moved in with your parent close to the beach. Digesting as much salty air as you had, you became restless going to the beach to relax. A rather harsh wave smashed onto the beach bringing seaweeds a buttload of fishes and a hideous fish man with big bug eyes and webbed hands or was he a beautiful, sculpted tanned merman who needed help to find his friends? Paring: OT7 x reader Wordcount: 2.7k A/N: Sorry it took so long and I have been trying to get the hang of tumblr so please bear with me editing mistakes. Thank you for all the comments on the first chapter, I am never satisfied with my work so seeing you all like it makes me excited for more.

Your legs weren’t carrying you as fast as you wanted. You wanted to be as far away as possible. The financial stability you had been pining for had just been flushed down the drain and you were just so overwhelmed. You were never the most athletic of the bunch but today you could prove yourself wrong. The only sounds you could hear was the wind whipping against your body. You furiously tried to breathe, but the air was knocked out of you with every step you took. Your vision was collapsing on itself with the lack of oxygen that was entering your lungs. Your body shook violently as you round the corner of the street a little too late slamming your foot on the red and white traffic pole. The minor injury did not slow you down at all. You kept running the harsh pavement heating up under your foot, becoming a pain to move. Your name echoed through your head, your body jolting backwards slamming into a hard surface. You winced in pain as the adrenaline left your body, finally feeling the weight of your situation and the open wound on your leg .You watched the cars zoom past, too busy to care about the pedestrians waiting to cross; this foolish crusade of yours could have ended badly. The arm that had pulled you back tightened around your wrist. Your eyes scanned the road in front of you before looking up at the owner of the hand. “Hoseok” The drive was suffocating. Hoseok had not said anything after he bandaged your wounded leg and dragged you into his car. He tossed his now damage groceries, that he had dropped to chase you, into the trunk. Your anxiety peeking through as you nibbled at your fingernail. He looked through the rear view mirror letting out a disapproving sigh. “Stop that” He motioned for you to take your finger out of your mouth which you did reluctantly. He refocused on the road leaving you to your own devices once again. You decided to look out the window, small trees and dried grass was all you could see for miles. Crossing your arms you allowed the wind to blow your hair not minding the way it whipped your face. You had concluded Hoseok wasn’t carrying you home and you could not be happier, but a little knowledge on where you were going would put your mind at ease. You didn’t want to talk to anyone at the moment, but knowing Hoseok and you weren’t on good terms made you queasy so you did the only thing you knew would melt his heart. “Hoseok?” You whispered putting on the best puppy eyes you could “No” He deadpanned not even looking at you. You scoffed; leaning back into the seat “Rude” you whispered under your breath missing the way Hoseok had to bite his lips to contain his smile.

..........

“Wow!” Your voice was louder than you expected on the quiet beach. Hoseok had hauled your injured self out of the beach and dragged you onto the sand. You made a small snail trail that would be helpful if you got lost wondering the beach which wouldn’t be unlikely with how excited you were. You’ve never seen the ocean in your life; your parents never liked the salty air or the sound of the waves. They wanted to live in a wealthy area not ‘some fisherman’s village’ and you just never had time for recreational activities. The aquarium at work could not compare to the vast ocean and long beaches. You sat down, unable to walk anymore with your injured leg. The sand was warm under your skin, sighing contently; you looked at the water eyes reflecting the scorching sun that bounced of the ocean. Everything was serene Everything was beautiful The sand crunched under Hoseok’s weight, you didn’t pay attention to his persistent poking to busy soaking up the view that you might not see again in a while. You really should visit the beach more often. Hoseok was fed up with you ignoring him like he had done to you through the whole car ride. He spun the soda can, now full with condensation, trying to find the coldest area. He smiled devilishly as he placed it onto your skin. You quickly jolt back hissing in surprise, quickly slapping Hoseok on his arm before he had time to flee. He fell into fits of giggles when you grumbled, rubbing the your skin to heat it up. “Namjoon told me about what happened” He sobered up rather quickly opening the can and handing it to you. You swung the can into small circles, slushing around the soda in the can. You hummed as you took a sip, peeking over the can waiting for Hoseok to continue. He also seemed to be waiting for you to say something or at least to give a different reaction if the deer in headlights look on his face was anything to go by. You cracked a smile taking another sip before putting the can down. “Is that why you took me here then, to cheer me up?” “No. I wanted to see you in a swimsuit.” He leaned in a little causing his breath to tickle your face. The serious look on his face caused you to splutter a little. You made a disgusted face leaning back to put distance between both of you. Hoseok’s laughter sound like music to your ears. He returned to his former position, finally taking a sip from his own drink. Hoseok and you had developed a flirty relationship over the years; you both would either reciprocate or reject the other person advances. This type of friendship came out of nowhere but you had no problem with it. “You should move in with your parents. If you get kicked out I mean…” He rose from the ground dusting the sand off his clothes. “They’ve probably been waiting for you to go home for a while” He held out his hand for you to take pulling you off the beach. “I know” you whispered, picking the cans off the sand. “They’re just -”A sigh escaped your lips as stacked the cans ontop of each other following after your friend to the car. Your parents weren’t bad people they just weren’t ready to have children, and it showed. They always kept you at arm’s length, like you were an acquaintance. They would control your social circle deeming Hoseok not worthy to be your friend and that you should get married to Namjoon for connections to his family. “I know…” He smiled sadly “But it’s been years. They are old now. You can leave if it becomes too much.” He turned around taking the cans from you, resting them into the cup holder. You grunted deep in thought. What if he was right? Could they change? You looked back at the beach for the last time as the car started driving. You missed it already.

“Hoseok wait!!” He slowed down the car; you ignored the confusion all over his face as you popped the door open running far down the beach. You ignored the pain that surged through your body, probably reopening the wound on your leg. The sand clung to your feet like it was trying to stop you from where you were going, you stumbled a little before scooping the item in your hand. You turned around to the street giving Hoseok a thumbs up. Following the trail you made earlier in the day you clambered into the car closing the door. You held the item closer to your chest, contented.

..........

Packing was all you seemed to be doing nowadays. Your possessions seemed endless with the need to rest cutting in ever so often. You looked at your still bandaged leg frowning a bit. The leg had gotten infected when you underestimated the severity of the injury giving you a well overdue hospital visit. Hoseok refused to make you continue packing since you needed to ‘rest according to doctor instructions’. He was correct but your rest time prolonged your packing. You had the whole week to pack up and move out which you thought was more than enough time since you had the help of Namjoon and Hoseok, but they had been at work for majority of the week, so most of the work fell on your shoulders. Despite your lack of communication, you were thankful that your parents had paid for the damage to the apartment, saving Namjoon and your wallet from the burden of a lifetime. You decided to rest, wobbling over to your bed. You looked around your almost barren room spying the item you had picked up from the beach. It collected the sunlight in your room separating them in small rays illuminating small areas off the room. You weren’t sure if what you picked up was a seashell, it was shaped like one; if you put it close to your ears you could hear the sea but it looked like an aquamarine gem. It looked so fragile you didn’t dare to take it up after you accidentally dropped it earlier in the week. You have been thinking about making it into a necklace. Warmth spread around your chest whenever you looked at the seashell, you weren’t sure if it was a memory of your time at the ocean or because of how beautiful it looked just sitting on your bedside table. You taped the final box, bending backward to stretch your back. You let out a pleased groan when the muscle loosened. You looked at the clock, just in time you thought. The boxes were already lined up at the front of your apartment waiting for the moving truck. Namjoon had texted you, sorrowful that he couldn’t be there to help you move out. He was just so endearing you couldn’t be mad at him. You sat down on one of the boxes, checking the time. “Any minute now” You grumbled staring at the phone like it would cause time to speed up. When the sound of feet approached you, you quickly got up from the box to give the movers space to do their job. But the sound of your name caused you to look away from your phone. “Mom?” Her eyes were glassed over as she took in your form. You guess that happens when you haven’t seen your only child for years. She covered her mouth choking on her tears a little before turning to your father. They really aged gracefully. The fine lines and wrinkles on their face gave them a softer appearance than what you were used to. They looked like grandparents, kind and wise. You could imagine your mom baking cookies and your dad making a fool of himself trying to help her before she kicks him out of the kitchen. ‘Imagine’ “Mom” She teared up repeating what you had called her. “I’m so sorry, my daughter” Few words had to be spoken to know what that meant. How deep it cut you? You might never know, but the tears streaming down your face had said enough for your parents. The movers quickly stacked the boxes into the truck not sparing a second glance at you and your parents tear eyed and red faces, probably to not make you uncomfortable. After finalizing the move with you the men returned to the truck transporting everything to your new residence. Your father started off in the direction of their vehicle not saying anything to both you and your mom. Her watery smile struck you in your heart, she clasped her frail hands. “Let’s go home”

..........

“Mom!!” She placed a hand over heart still not used to the term of endearment. She wasn’t sure how she went through most of your life not liking the term. She hummed, still stirring the porridge she turned to look at you. You were clinging onto the door frame for dear life having woken up early to go to work. It would take an hour or two to reach but you didn’t mind. You ha adjusted nicely into your new home despite it being a couple days. Your parents had tried their best to make you feel welcomed, correcting their past mistakes. Asking about Hoseok and Namjoon ever so often, trying to integrate your friends into their lives.

“Have you seen my wetsuit?” Before your mother could answer, your father was at the door handing your wetsuit to you. He didn’t say anything as per usual, walking back to his chair on the front porch to overlook the sea. You folded the warm wetsuit placing it under your arm; he must’ve hanged it outside on the line for it to dry since you were too tired to do it last night.

“Thanks dad” You whispered. He grunted as a reply waving you off to get dressed.

Old age does change how someone perceives life. Your parents seemed to value a more peaceful, simple life. Unlike their younger selves who wanted money, business and connections. Now your mom went fishing with your father, she hummed songs as she planted flowers in the windowsills or baked for the children in the village a mile or so from the beach where you reside. The beach house was rather beautiful perched on a cliff, surrounded by shrubs and coconut trees, which mom always had use for. She would experiment making grater cake or coconut pudding allowing you to be the taste tester. Ideally you’d have wanted a father just as openly doting as your mother but this was fine. He took care of you in silence, behind the scenes, washing your wetsuit or suddenly not being hungry when only one portion of lobster was left. If you refused and told him to eat it he would leave the table and sit in his chair overlooking the ocean, forcing you to eat the last piece or it would go bad.

Placing all your belongings into a draw bag you pecked your mom on the cheek and your dad on the forehead before making your way to the bus stop. Your parents had insisted you use their car but your lack of driver’s license would make that impossible.

.........

You, Hoseok and Namjoon were the only ones at work. What irked you more was the lack of work you were getting. The tenseness in the air was palpable as you munched on the snacks you found in the fridge. Namjoon looked too sick to eat picking at his food ever so often. Hoseok was trying to sleep which remain unsuccessful. The lunchroom door opening startled all of you to varying degrees. Seeing your boss march through the door you pulled your hand from the fridge taking a cup of coconut pudding with you. Namjoon was alert while Hoseok sluggishly sat up, fatigue settling in his bones.

“You’re eating more food?” You bossed cocked an eyebrow in your direction. The question sounded normal; as eating before doing your job, which mostly involved swimming wasn’t the best idea. But you understood what he was insinuating, he ‘teased’ you alot. You shoved another spoon of pudding into your mouth to avoid confrontation. Seeing he wasn’t going to get a reaction, he cleared his throat deciding to talk about the matter at hand.

He placed a flyer on the table. One you had been seeing for a while now, on every surface they could fit.

A photoshopped picture of a mermaid sat at the forefront. Around the image were words saying this was the newest attraction for the aquarium. The aquarium wasn’t running low on funds so you didn’t know the need for a stunt like this. It didn’t matter to you, the more the merrier. You could ask them how they managed to hold their breaths so long or swim so gracefully.

“You and you” He pointed to both men in the room. “I need you to train them.”

“You” He pointed to me, seemingly taking in my current condition of being unable to swim he thought carefully about the task. “Reward them if they deserve it; punish them if they deserve it.

The already quiet room fell into a deafening silence.

“They’re arriving in a week or so, so be prepared.” He pulled his phone from his coat pocket, dialing someone before making his exit. Leaving all of you to rationalize what he had said, because mermaids were only mythological.

They didn’t exist.

[thecardsimagine]

Of shipwrecks and seafoam

Summary: Let me tell you a story about a pirate and a merman, finding a love that goes beyond insecurities and death. Let yourself be taken away onto a journey about doubt and secrets, understanding and a bond that even goes beyond the deep blue of the ocean.

Pairing: Merman!Julian Devorak x Pirate!Reader (Nonbinary) Rating: Mature because of swearing and suggestive content Warning: Blood, Death, Killing Genre: Romance, Drama, Alternate Universe ____________________________________________________________

ADDITIONAL WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: Self-doubt/-loathing, Argumenting, Mentioning of Death ____________________________________________________________

a/n: I actually don’t have anything to say to this, it just needed to get out. But it’s getting better, I promise.

Tagging: @julians-chest-hair / @sireennotsiren ____________________________________________________________

Chapter 9 - Falling out of Paradise

Days, even weeks, passed.

You now slept near the thicket, covered by big palm leaves and you had moved to the other side of the island, hoping it would make it harder for him to find you. At days, you were driven by your anger and your goal to escape, spending most of your time in the bushes, collecting and gathering what you needed. On a clearing in the forest, you had set up your work materials, doing the first few drafts.

In all the time, you hadn’t seen Julian at all. Only once you had returned to your first camp, finding fresh fish there. But it didn’t matter anymore, you would not depend on him any further. Yes, you would rather eat the bugs on the trees instead of the fish he brought. On some point, you managed to create a fishing rod, a primitive version at that, but testing it out at a calm point of time, it had worked in a way you could only be happy about, providing you with fish.

You also started collecting things like food, hanging it out to dry on a rack, anything that would help you survive. And you overcame your fear of gutting them too, following the merman’s example and getting rid of their head while you were at it. Water was a tough matter though, but you planned out your boat in a way, that would allow you to have a small fire, so you would be able to get drinkable water.

Getting all the wood and materials together was hard. The only thing harder than that was building the actual boat. The vines you used as ropes would often snap and make you start all over again. With a mix of wood, dirt, and clay, you eventually managed to create something that would float over the ocean, your work leaving you dirty and in pain, as your wounds opened under the pressure and new ones came up from working with materials you had never touched before.

Only when the curtains of stars long hung over the night sky, you’d return to your new camp, trying to get as much sleep as you could, while ignoring the bugs that were coming to explore you every night. You never let yourself admit it, especially with how strong you had to be, but the loneliness was killing you. If not for the faint goal of being able to be under a lot of people again soon, you wouldn’t have been able to hold out.

Finally, after all this time, you had been able to sort out everything that was in your head and the emotions. It made you feel better, knowing you were sane again and not lured by some merman’s word and touches. Losing your crew had been tragic, especially with the circumstances of their death. But you couldn’t keep living while burdening yourself with what happened. The ship war hadn’t been your fault, and their deaths were just the destiny they chose by setting out into the ocean on a pirate ship.

And Julian? He must have had his own chip on his shoulder, desperate to succeed in his own doings. There was no way you could justify the mermaids eating humans, but after processing what you had learned, it seemed like he had his own pressure on him after all. Not all his words had been the truth maybe, but not everything had to be the untruth either. Perhaps he really did feel some sort of guilt or attraction to you, prompting him to take care of you. It was just a shame that he didn’t have the guts to kill you right away, leaving you like a suffering animal and tending to your wounds only to get rid of you when he would need your body for some sick experiment.

Your affection must have been superficial too. Just some halt you wanted to gain after losing your place of belonging, alongside the person you loved. That’s why you had jumped on the first best opportunity there was, an idiotic move, but you didn’t think about it too much on this point anymore. Thinking about it… hurt. In a way, you didn’t want to admit it. These touches you shared had to mean nothing, as did the kisses. You couldn’t let yourself get infatuated any further than this. You had to make yourself believe it was nothing, there was no other way your fragile self could work otherwise.

The days passed like none had ever before for you. Never had you ever spent so much time focusing on something, that you didn’t realize how fast the days had gone by. It was a one-man-celebration when you finally managed to get the boat out of the forest, it being ready to set out, from the body to the sail which was hand-weaved from vines too. You spend the rest of the day packing what you needed, gathering as many sticks and leaves as you could, and organizing everything. When night broke down on you, you set out to the last place you needed to go before leaving, ready to solve the things that kept you up for many nights before.

With skill you had acquired by now, you lit up a fire on your old camping spot, immediately stepping back a few steps and tightening your grip on the spear in your hand. Even after all this time… you couldn’t just leave. You knew he’d see the fire and you knew he would come. And while you told yourself you just did it, so you didn’t have to be afraid of him coming to ravage your boat, you knew it was also to make peace with yourself and your feelings for him.

Of course, you didn’t have to wait long.

Less than a minute must have passed before you saw the bubbles and you answered the call from your body to take another step back before Julian emerged. As if he had been shot out of the water, he immediately surpassed the fireplace, landing maybe an arm length away from you before he called out. “[Name]! Oh my god, [Name]!” he whined, trying to rob further over the sand and closer to you, ignoring the pain it must have brought him. But you calmly took a step back for every inch he approached.

You could see it in his eyes, the questions, the desperation. It must have been your own anger reflecting on him, but you saw anger glisten through his eyes too. “Where have you been? What have you been doing? Do you know how many moons passed?” A sting hit you with how worried he sounded, his voice so sweet like the finest pralines. And yet you couldn’t help but despise him for the lies he was telling you with the words he used.

“I know,” you revealed. “Then, why did you disappear? [Name]?!” He made another desperate leap forward, needily trying to come close to you, but before he could touch your foot, you drove the spear down into the sand right where his hand would have been. Surprised, he reflexively pulled his limb back, looking up at you unbelieving. “[Name], what…”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” you asked, voice shivering from the anger boiling up. “Why didn’t you tell me you were eating humans?!” Your scream got caught in the sound of the waves crashing behind him, his eyes dulling and the pointed ears sinking. “But I told you, we don’t eat them-”

“Yeah,” you interrupted him, holding back on the tears building in your eyes. “You didn’t. Of all people I didn’t get to hear it from you, Julian. But your sister! At least she was honest!” You saw him gulp before his jaw tensed, realization coming over him. “How many people do you have to eat to get 700, Julian? Will you get to 1000 now that you ate all of my friends?” His gaze lowered to the sand, before it shot up again, piercing yours. “But it’s not true, I’m not eating them! [Name], just listen-”

“Oh, so you are not. How are the serums coming along? Got what you need from their bodies? Their teeth, their bones, their blood? Is it at least working? Was it worth killing all of them?” You pulled out the spear again as he tried to approach you once more, desperately trying to touch you, console you even. But seeing the sharp end, he only whined softly, taking back his arm. You could see his other hand clawing so hard into the sand, his joints seemed to pop out any seconds now. Even though it was only in the light shimmer of the fire, you could see how his pale complexion seemed to have turned into a ghostly, dead white. Fitting for a beast, how you thought.

“When were you going to tell me you can turn mermaids into humans? Has your ‘leader’ rewarded you for making sure the bodies are properly used? Have you been a good, fucking doctor?!” His brows furrowed in question before he shook his head. “No, it’s nothing like that! I- I was just- I mean-” he stammered, trying to explain himself panicky.

“What about me? Am I the next?” you pressed out desperately. Only letting your eyes off him for a second, you felt yourself fall into a pit of misery “What?!” he shrieked, a tone so high it hurt your ears. “No, [Name], never! Nothing is going to happen to you, just let me explain it, please! Stop moving away! Come back! Don’t go away!” obviously in a panic, he dragged his body further, flinching at you raising your spear up high, but not stopping.

“Why, Julian, why?” you cried, the tears fell before you could even react. “How heartless can you be, why would you deceive me like this?” His face contorted in pain as he watched you cry, but unlike you, he didn’t shed a tear. And though you knew it was because he couldn’t, it made it all the more clear how unreal he was. “I didn’t deceive you, I would never harm you, [Name]! Stop!”

“Am I just the next snack? Your reserve human if the ones you killed aren’t enough? Do you think I will taste better if you care for me, befriend me? Did I taste delicious when I kissed you, you sick bastard?!” you screamed at him, his expression turned inhuman for a few seconds with his teeth bared towards you. Like the animal he was. But in the next moment, his face changed again, becoming less aggressive, calmer even. “How could I have told you?” he asked, the pain written in his expression making him so much more older than he usually looked.

“So it’s true?” you shrieked, the desperation hitting you too. “Yes, in the beginning, it was true!” he screamed right back at you and no matter how beautiful his voice was, the bellowing you could feel all the way into your bones. “You had the highest chances of survival, we could have… cultivated you and only harvest in small portions, I thought it was for the best! You would live, we would get what we want, everyone would have been happy!”

Your breathing faltered, his confirmation was just too hard to handle. “But it changed, [Name]! I changed, I-” he reached out for you again, but for the first time since you met him, you hit, the spear scratching the side of his pointer finger. He didn’t even flinch from the pain, just reaching out further and further. “I watched you try so desperately to live. I saw all of it, and I stopped wanting to use you for a cause that will never work anyway.” The last of his words were barely a whisper as if he just realized the truth behind them.

“Stop, just stop,” you cried, shaking your head and holding your ears closed with your hands. It was just a way to lure you in again, to make you believe him. “Please stop [Name]! I know I made mistakes, but I beg of you! I need you, I just…” You watched him clutch the area of his chest where you had laid on before, presumably where his heart was. “It hurts, [Name], please stop what you are doing, it hurts so much, I don’t know how to handle these feelings! What could I have done? I couldn’t have told you these things, look at you know!”

For the first time, you felt like you could understand him at least a little. Of course, if he had told you, you would have freaked out just like this. But was it enough to justify his actions? Not even your body was asking you to get away anymore in your doubt. Instead, it made you want to stay. You knew exactly what he felt. What he meant with it hurting. You knew it because you felt it too in your chest, and unlike him, you were able to understand these feelings that were so strange to him. Part of you wanted to run back to him, hug him, forgive him, but you knew you couldn’t, you had to be strong, it was all just him pretending, and he would make you pay with your life if you were to believe him.

Finally, you took a deep breath, making another step back, though he immediately closed up on you. You couldn’t believe yourself that you were going to do it. Going to really cut off ties with him, make him suffer like you had. And use words you would have never even used on your worst enemy. It was all just going to hurt you more, and you knew it.

“God, I hate you so much,” you mumbled, looking him directly into his eyes. “You’re nothing but a disgusting monster, I can’t stand looking at you trying to pretend you could feel anything.” You saw how his face lost all of its expressions, turning into the blankest you had ever seen someone look like. Maybe it wasn’t as empty as you perceived it, but you weren’t capable of understanding all the emotions it showed, some so foreign to you, you knew they weren’t human. “You promised, [Name],” he reminded you softly, his voice vibrating.

“Yeah, I promised a friend. But all I see is a monster.”

“You are killing me [Name]. Don’t say you hate me. Please....”

“I just wish you had killed me,” you whispered, another wave of tears coming over you. “Why are you saying these things?” he croaked, his claws finally reaching up to you, digging into your skin and leaving red marks. Pain rushed through you, but you ignored it. “I never want to see you again, I hope you strand somewhere and dry out like the fish you are.” Kicking off his hand, you took your spear, stepping even further back into the direction of the woods. Finally, he gave up following you, just watching you disappear further into the darkness.

“I don’t understand what is going on, please help me, [Name]! Please explain it to me! Please!” he howled after you. You could hear what sounded like sobs, but you were unable to see his face anymore with the distance you gained. “Go back to your flock, Julian. Make some potions and be a good fucking monster. Maybe you will choke on a bone and start to understand, you killer.”

“No, [Name], no…” he cried loudly, and you could hear him scream your name over and over while you ducked away into the thicket. Only then you turned your back, running until your breath set out and you slammed to the ground, crying and panting. Drumming your fists into the dirt, you tried to take the pain it gave you to ease the pain of your heart and mind. At least it was finally over. That was the only thing you told yourself over and over, hoping it would make it endurable.

But it didn’t.

It just drove you deeper and deeper in this pain radiating from your heart, all the betrayal and sinister intentions cutting deeper than a knife could ever. It hurt, and it hurt, and it hurt. So you cried and cried some more until your tears had probably made sure the whole forest was supplied with water. You let out all the fear and frustration, anger and sadness that was inside of you, your screams echoing in the distance, alongside those of a certain creature who seemed to reply with the same kind of sorrow and pain.

You long had lost the ability to hear your name, which Julian cried over and over, tears flooding from his eyes for the first time in his whole life, burning his skin as they were much too hot for a creature like him. But he took all this pain, and he would have taken more of it, if only it had brought you back to him.

He knew he could never understand why you kept running away, why his words didn’t seem to reach you anymore, why you would call him bad names. Was he the reason that you cried again? How could you break your promise and hate him? He understood all of his own questions, and yet, he didn’t want to understand them at all. Julian felt like an empty shell of himself, his heartbeat ringing in his ears, but there was no feeling in any other part of his body.

It would take a long time until finally, a big, old mermaid managed to rob all the way up to him, silently brushing her old, long claws over his head. ‘It hurts,’ he cried in his language, over and over. ‘I know. Love always does,’ she would reply. And Julian didn’t understand it, but he believed the woman that had raised him, collapsing into her arms and releasing more steaming, hot tears until his cheeks were smoldered in red, burned streams.

In the earliest morning hours, you got up from your place of rest, brushing off the palm leaves and approached your boat. Your body was way too weak from all the crying and emotional stress you had gone through only a few hours prior, but it was time, and you had to leave. Surely, he must have given up his search if he even had searched for you. Certainly, he would not come for you anymore. Pushing the floating raft into the water, you quickly jumped on, setting the sail like you learned to do as a pirate.

From here on, it would only be you until civilization. No fables, no hallucination, no unnecessary feelings, only the salvation you were seeking. It was as it should have been from the start. You would have a good life, it would be splendid. Yes, you knew that. Everything was going to be alright as soon as you forgot about all of these happenings. You needed to be quick to forget. Needed to forget the island, eating bugs and fish. Forget forging a spear and having to build a boat to get back to civilization.

Forget Julian.

It was going to be alright. You just needed to convince yourself.