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#they should have nominated it for the weird filters categorie
conlangprompts · 4 years
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Agma Schwa’s CONLANG SPEEDRUN - Copied with Permission
Prerequisites: have internet open, have Excel or Sheets open 
 RULES: Choose phonology Cannot be website default, must have at least six differences from default Syllable Pattern: [1]CV(CV)(N), [2]CV(CV), [3](C)V(CV), [4] CV(N)CV(N), [5] (N)CV(N)(CV), [6] CVN(CV)(N) Roll D6 Choose to generate 5000 words, filter duplicates, new line each (this will probably create around 1000 words), put on Excel/Sheets. If it cannot generate at least 1000 words, more variables need to be added to phonology. 10-13 additions seems to always be sufficient, but six minimum for the game. At least five phonological changes top 100/207 from one of Wiktionary’s Swadesh lists, put on Excel/Sheets Have categories for Verbs, Nouns, Adjectives, Adverbs Are affixes (1,2)prefixes, (3,4)suffixes, (5)infixes, (6)particles Roll D6 Word Order:  (1)SVO, (2)SOV, (3)VOS, (4)OSV, (5)OVS, (6)VSO Roll D6 (1)Nominative/Accusative vs. (2)Ergative Absolutive Roll D2  (1)Synthetic vs. (2)Analytic Roll D2 If Synthetic, create NOM/ERG, ACC/ABS, DAT, GEN markers according to phonology Verb Conjugation: (1)None, (2,3)Number+Tense, (4)Number, (5,6)Tense Roll D6 If no tense conjugation, create tense auxiliaries as follows: Tense: (1)None, (2,3,4,5)Past+Present+Future, (6) Past+Present Roll D6 Grammatical Number: (1,2)Singular/Plural, (3,4)Singular/Dual/Plural, (5)Singular/Paucal/Plural, (6)Singular/Plural/Collective Roll D6 Noun-Adjective Agreement: (1)Yes, (2)No Subject/Agent-Verb Agreement: (1)Yes (2) No Roll D2 Articles: (1,2)None, (3)Definite, (4)Definite/Indefinite, (5,6)Definite/Indefinite/Demonstrative Roll D6 Aspects: (1,2)Perfective, (3)Imperfective, (4)Progressive, (5)Habitual, (6)Simple Roll D4 to determine how many aspects to include Roll D6 that many times to find out which forms must be marked (Simple may be unmarked if it is not rolled) Moods: (1)Conditional, (2,3)Indicative, (4)Imperative, (5)Interrogative, (6)Inferential Roll D4 to determine how many moods to include Roll D6 that many times to find out which forms must be marked (Indicative may be unmarked if it is not rolled) Name the Language Roll D1000, choose from the word list. f it already has a definition, too bad, justify the weird name culturally Make an Acceptable Translation of: “All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.” LINKS REQUIRED Wiktionary Swadesh List Appendix: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Append...) Phonology and Word List: http://akana.conlang.org/tools/awkwords/ Dice Rolling: https://rolladie.net/ Sound Changes: http://zompist.com/sca2.html Time Yourself: https://www.online-stopwatch.com/
Link to Agma’s video
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crowdedimagines · 5 years
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It’s Just PR - Shawn Mendes (PART TWO)
Ft. Harry Styles:) PART ONE 
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Shawn quickly storms away after that, much to everyone’s relief. It’s weird to see him act like this, let alone in front of so many people. This whole summer has been about his image, but it seems like tonight he doesn’t care for that a whole lot.
“I am so sorry for the way he was acting. Usually he isn’t so awful to other people, but his jealousy really does bring out the worst in him.”
“No worries at all, love.” Harry reassures, “Are you okay? I wasn’t the only one here he was saying hurtful things to.”
I take his words into consideration, and he’s right. Shawn and I fight, as most couples do, but ever since this whole PR thing started it’s made everything so much worse between us. Less dates together and our nights in were usually spent feuding the entire time.
“You never got to answer my question. What awards are you up for tonight?” Harry quickly changes the subject.
“Umm, Song of the Summer and Artist of the Year.”
“Wow.” He grins proudly, “Those are big awards! I’m sure you’ll kill it.”
“I hope so, I’m running against Seniorita for song of the summer. And then again against Shawn for artist of the year.” I roll my eyes. “Sorry, tonight isn’t actually supposed to be about him.”
“It’s fine, love. Just breath. You’re doing great.”
Harry reaches out to take my hand in his which I accept. Is this wrong? Shawn and I obviously have issues between us, but we never officially broke up. Why do I have to feel guilty about this when I know tonight he’s going to be all over her.
Harry and I only get to talk for a few minutes before the show officially starts. The host comes out and says his cheesy lame jokes that manage their way into every award show. Taylor Swift opened the show which was seemingly a bit awkward, even though it’s been years since her and Harry dated. Her performance was amazing and iconic, per usual, and things kept moving after that.
“I think you’re up next, love!” Harry leans in to whisper loudly over the cheers of the audience.
“Alright next up, we have Song of the Summer.” They continue to read off the other nominees, Harry teasingly leans in and bumps my shoulder when the camera pans to me and I roll my eyes with a smile nonetheless.
“And the winner is…”
They pause to open up the envelope and build up everyone’s anticipation.
“Ariana Grande with Boyfriend!”
I can’t help but grin widely not only for someone who is my friend to win, but more importantly for the song that has been ruining my entire summer to lose.
“Well, you’ve still got another one.” Harry encourages, his arm is laid across the back of my chair.
“I don’t care if I win. I’ve had a good night, thanks to you.”
His dimples make a reappearance while he humbly shakes his head.
“I’m actually really glad you called. It’s been far too long since we’ve seen each other. We’ve seen each other, but we haven’t hung out truly in years.”
He’s right. We stopped hanging out when I started dating Shawn. There had always been this unspoken connection between Harry and I. Once I became exclusive, it felt wrong to still be seeing him.
“I’m glad I did too.”
The lights in the room dim around us, meaning it’s likely there’s another performance about to happen. It takes less than a second to recognize the dreaded first notes to the song. Shawn and Camila both make their appearance and sing the song through, dancing together.
His hand grabs her waist and slowly slides down.
“Jesus.” I mutter.
Harry lets out a chuckle at my reaction.
“Let’s make a game of it.” Harry whispers, being a perfect distraction from the sight unfolding in front of me, “Let’s go take a shot everytime they do something cringey.”
“I don’t know what’s funnier, the fact I can’t tell if you’re joking. Or the fact that you just said cringey.”
We both breakout in laugher, the rest of the crowd is in awe as they finish the song. Harry and I are still laughing when I look up to see Shawn and Camila center stage, right on the edge. It looks like they were supposed to kiss, but now Camila is awkwardly leaning up towards him while Shawn’s focus is lasered on us.
“I can’t wait for this night to be over.” I whisper, the lights all go out and come back on again once the stage is cleared and they’re ready to move on with everything. They filter through more awards and finally they get to the category I’ve been most anticipating tonight.
“Alright, our last award of the evening is Artist of the Year. Here are our nominees.”
They continue to show everyone who’s been nominated this year, the camera pans to me and I smile and feel my cheeks warm slightly. Right after that it cuts to Shawn who I didn’t notice join the crowd somewhere. Camila is glued pretty close to his side, and every sense of guilt I had previously is gone.
“And the winner is… Y/n!” They cheer my name and my legs are standing me up before I can truly process it. Harry pulls me in for a tight hug and I smile. I quickly run around to the stage and up the steps. I hug the two people who were presenting and turn towards the microphone.
“I want to start off with saying that I am so thankful. I wouldn’t be here tonight if it wasn’t for my loyal fans who have always had my back. Speaking of loyal, I would also like to thank my friends and family. They have also gotten me here, and made me into the person I am today. I would also like to say a quick thank you for my inspiration behind my music. Love is always changing, so here’s to new inspiration.”
The crowd breaks out in a cheer and I hold out my award with a smile. I can feel Shawn’s eyes burning into me, but I don’t make our eyes meet. Instead, I smirk proudly. They guide me to the backstage where they take several photos for press. Eventually, I make it back out and find Harry.
“Hey, are you ready to finally leave?” He asks with a grin.
“Thank god, yes!”
He holds out his arm like the polite gentleman that he is and we walk outside and wait for his car to pull up. We both are in the middle of talking when we hear a voice clear their throat behind us. I turn only to be met with Camila and Shawn, closely behind us. I’m sure Shawn is the one who cleared his throat.
“Camila, you look lovely tonight. I love the dress.” I smile.
She hesitates and I can tell the compliment throws her off. Camila glances to Shawn, obviously confused before she sputters out a thank you and I turn back around. I have a proud smirk for catching her so off guard. I meant what I said, I wasn’t lying to her. She does look really nice tonight. Especially with my man on her arm.
“You’re an evil little minx, aren’t you?” Harry teases, leaning down to whisper in my ear.
“Trust me, this is nothing.”
In perfect timing, Harry’s car pulls up and he holds the door open for me to slide in first. Harry follows shortly after. I manage to catch a glimpse of Shawn’s eyes before the door shut. It’s a mixture of expressions across his face in a split second. Hurt. Anger. Jealousy. 
should this become a series?  FEEDBACK PLZ
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jeanvaljean24601 · 4 years
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The Winners And Losers From The 2020 Emmy Nominations
The 2020 Emmy nominations rolled out today, and boy, were they something. Right away, Rhea Seehorn fans grew furious that she was somehow left on the side of the road again, and it’s very strange to not see Larry David receive more nods for being a lovable curmudgeon on HBO, but perhaps he’s topped out with a lifetime total of 27 Emmy nominations and 2 wins. We could also talk about numbers mattering, which is good news on the HBO front, with Watchmen and Succession scoring 26 and 18 nominations, respectively, and Disney+ scooping up 15 nods for The Mandalorian, although sorry, Baby Yoda, you are somehow not eligible for acting awards.
That’s not as satisfying, though, as talking about the real winners and losers, which is a fine tradition here. Please do not consider this to be a complete list of wronged-and-righted parties (for example, I cannot even begin to understand why Desus and Mero got the shaft, which shouldn’t have happened), but let’s get this ball rolling, shall we?
When it comes to Ozark, I kind-of get why people don’t want to give this show a shot at first. The bizarre insistence upon a blue filter goes a long way, for example, or the fact that it arguably fine-tunes the Walt-Jesse dynamic from Breaking Bad — yes, that might grind some gears. Yet all of those concerns don’t matter once you surrender to the setting and watch Jason Bateman lose his sh*t in consistently captivating ways. The acting nominations here were all well deserved, as was the Outstanding Drama series nod, especially with that cliffhanger. I do look forward to one day seeing Julia Garner win her 15th Emmy in, like, 2045, but let’s also shout out Dead To Me. That little Netflix series also been recognized once again despite (probably) being intended as a trash-comfort watch. Yet it works surprisingly well to stir up a wide range of emotions and affirm humanity in the process. Also, recognition for Linda Cardellini will never get old. Now she can forget that Capone came out this year. h96 tv box
Let’s make one thing clear: Reese is doing just fine. In fact, she’s likely doing wonderful. However, her prestige TV turns have gone unrewarded for this year’s ceremony. Whereas Jennifer Aniston received a nod for Apple TV’s The Morning Show, Reese didn’t walk away with the same honor for her performance as an unruly spitfire of a co-host. Her Hulu and HBO roles, in Little Fires Everywhere and Big Little Lies, also went unrecognized. I can only guess that there simply wasn’t enough room for all the BLL ladies, and although her ruffling of Adam Scott was convincing enough, neither she nor Nicole Kidman could beat out Laura Dern and Meryl Streep’s  extremely unhinged  turns on the show. Still, Reese will not walk away from 2020 empty-handed. Quibi  paid her $6 million to narrate a wildlife series, and you gotta respect that hustle.
Yes, I did suggest that numbers don’t matter, but c’mon. Not only did The Mandalorian receive 15 nods, but Watchmen scored 26. The best part about Damon Lindelof’s show gathering so many decorations, though, is that no one even asked for a Watchmen TV series to be made. Alan Moore’s graphic novel was always considered to be unfilmable (and Zack Snyder made the case there), but Lindelof did it anyway. He recontextualized the whole story against the backdrop of a long-buried U.S. atrocity and hid Doctor Manhattan in the body of a Black man. He put the damn squid in there, included Jeremy Irons’ fart face, made Regina King walk on water (or not), and inserted a Lube Man. Watchmen could win no Emmys at all, and it’d still be the winner for all those things.
This one is a puzzler. The Emmys nominated Bob Odenkirk in 2019, 2017, 2016, and 2015, but he somehow came up short this year for his lead role in AMC’s Breaking Bad spinoff that landed on the top of our best shows of the year (so far) list. Even if one considers that his category was stacked — and let’s be honest here, it wasn’t airtight because Steve Carell‘s The Morning Show role felt more like a supporting role than a lead — it’s hard to ignore how the Emmy’s almost entirely shut out the Saul actors. And really, how does one justify continuing to leave Rhea Seehorn on the side of the road with an arc like the one she had this season? With  those finger guns… and everything? It just doesn’t make sense, but I guess at least Gus Fring is getting his due. h96 max tv box
Zendaya could become the  youngest winner of the Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series award for her turn in the provocative Euphoria. The drug-fueled series about teens isn’t an easy watch by any stretch, but it’s a relevant one, and Zendaya’s finally receiving the dramatic material that her talents deserve. On the Ramy side of things, it’s nice to see more affirmation that this is the best show that  you’re not currently watching. It’s a little disheartening to not see the show’s actresses gain recognition while their characters are finally coming to the forefront, but it’s hard to argue with the possibility of creator Ramy Youssef adding an Emmy to his Globe win for this dramedy about Muslim-Americans. Also, Mahershala Ali getting a nod for his Hot Sheikh means that at least something’s right in our current universe (after that Green Book mess).
Young women challenging institutions are where it’s at this year. Even though Watchmen will (and should) walk away with the Outstanding Limited Series category, I’m thrilled to see two insurgent-feeling shows, Unbelievable and Unorthodox, make the shortlist. Kaitlyn Dever should have also been nominated in the acting department for her turn as a rape survivor who was treated like a criminal, due to being an “imperfect victim,” but the show as a whole deserved the nod that it received for being taking such a feminist approach to crime-drama storytelling. And I’m pumped to see Unorthodox‘s Shira Hass pop up with an Outstanding Lead Actress In A Limited Series nod (she’s up against Regina King and Cate Blanchett), as well as seeing recognition for the  stunning miniseries’ exploration of a young woman’s flight from Hasidic Judaism. android tv box
Pacino’s first regular TV role in Amazon Prime’s Hunters was a highly anticipated one, but sadly, the show (despite plenty of enticing ingredients like Jordan Peele producing and, you know, the killing of Nazis),  didn’t hit the mark. Honestly, yeah, it was messy, and Pacino’s accent work managed to be one of the weirdest parts of a very weird show. It’s not worth too many words to rehash what happened there, for it’s enough to say that Pacino’s already won two TV-movie Emmys for You Don’t Know Jack and Angels In America. He’s also notched an Oscar win (in 1993 for Scent of a Woman) and eight Oscar nominations (including in 2020 for The Irishman). He doesn’t necessarily need to win at TV shows, too!
You can see the full list the  Emmy nominations here.
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hell-propaganda · 5 years
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How many people are going to Heaven vs. Hell?
Alright, let’s start with the age-old doctrine that all nonbelievers go straight to Hell whether they had an opportunity to learn about Christianity or not.
I know that some people believe that those who had never even heard of Christianity will not be punished for failing to practice it, but that’s a weird, inaccurate, and unsupported doctrine that has been widely debunked by Christian scholars
So:
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31.2% of the world is Christian. The graphic puts the actual number at 2.3 billion, but I found more recent data that put it at 2.42 billion but had no infographic lol.
So that means that 68.8% of the world is not Christian and therefore automatically doomed. That percentage translates into 5.2976 billion, or 5,297,600,000 souls destined to burn for eternity. Because they aren’t Christian.
Now, for the sake of simplicity in this post, I will only be examining the population of humans currently alive on Earth. It is estimated that there have been 105 billion (105,000,000,000) humans to have ever lived throughout history, with exceptionally high infant mortality rates for all pre-modern eras. We can generally assume that their numbers were way, way worse than our current ones, though. Once you go back 52 centuries, Christianity seems downright new
Now seems like a great time to remind everyone that limbo is a human-created concept that cropped up a few centuries ago when people started getting mad about so many babies being in Hell, having died before they were capable of belief
Next question. Do all Christians make it into Heaven? The answer: no, of course not, there are bad Christians out there. But what makes a Christian bad?
According to a lot of people, it’s denomination. I’ve seen Catholics saying all Protestants go to Hell, and Protestants saying the same thing about Catholics. There are multiple denominations I know of personally that consider all people who don’t practice their specific denomination to not count as true Christians at all, and that’s a legitimate part of their doctrine, not just a few opinionated leaders or whatever.
Some numbers:
Catholic Church— 1.285 billion
Protestants— 920 million
Anglicanism— 85 million
Eastern Orthodox Church— 270 million
Oriental Orthodoxy— 80 million
Nontrinitarian restorationism— 35 million
Independent Catholics— 18 million
Minor branches— 3 million
(Yes, your specific denomination is in one of those subgroups, they’re all listed, I promise. If you’re curious, look it up, do some research.)
This, specifically, is how Christianity has splintered over time:
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As you can see, there has been no singular “true” Christianity since the 1000s, and everything got very scream-y and chaotic after good old Martin Luther posted his 16th century callout post
Almost all of these groups believe that all the others are wildly heretical and doing Christianity “wrong.” I’m not getting into who’s right or not. I’m gonna look at the average.
When I added it up, my total number of Christians ended up being a bit higher than the 2.42 billion I was supposed to get, I got 2.696 billion (?). I redid the math and got that twice, even though the sum total came from the same data set that gave me the subgroup numbers. It doesn’t affect it that much, but please be aware that the end number should actually be lower than it is
Which means the mean average number of members in any one Christian subgroup/denomination is 337 million. We will use this as our number of people who are practicing the “right” form of Christianity.
Now. The third and final question. Are all people who have the “right” Christian beliefs going to Heaven?
Faith without works is nothing, so no. Let’s look at religious practice, then.
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(As a former Jehovah’s Witness they should have had a ‘daily’ category lol, that shit’s expected.)
THIS is a wildly lopsided axis of practice, with the average across all groups being 35% once a week and 45% seldom/never. People don’t read their Bible, apparently.
I would have just done the overall data but I had no way to filter out the non-Christian religions and atheists, and I thought that would be misrepresenting the data
Okay just two more axes of practice and then I’m done, I swear
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This was a bit more even, almost a perfect three-way split. 36% attend at least once a week, which is the most heavily weighted category
Basically, while people aren’t actually reading their Bible, they are going to church and listening to someone’s interpretation of it
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And lastly, prayer. This axis was lopsided in the opposite direction of the first, with 55% of adults praying at least once daily.
Now, for the final analysis:
I’m going to take those three statistics and smush them together to get a mean average of 42% of nominal Christians actively practicing the religion. Referring back to our earlier number of 337 million “true” Christians, that means that we have 141.54 million people doing everything they need to be doing to get into Heaven, or numerically, 141,540,000 people. Everyone else has been disqualified. With a total human population of 7.7 billion, 141.54 million is just 1.838%. The remainder is 98.162%, or 7,558,474,000 people.
So! In conclusion:
Heaven: 1.838%, or 141,540,000 souls
Hell: 98.162%, or 7,558,474,000 souls
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fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years
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Does Time’s Person of the Year Imply Real Progress?
http://fashion-trendin.com/does-times-person-of-the-year-imply-real-progress/
Does Time’s Person of the Year Imply Real Progress?
No one could have predicted 2017’s Time Person of the Year last December. Or even a few months ago. “The year, at its outset, did not seem to be a particularly auspicious one for women,” writes Time editor-in-chief Edward Felsenthal. “A man who had bragged on tape about sexual assault took the oath of the highest office in the land, having defeated the first woman of either party to be nominated for that office, as she sat beside a former President with his own troubling history of sexual misconduct.”
If 2017 began on a depressingly hopeless note, it’s ending on a depressingly hopeful note. Of course, you know all about the #MeToo movement by now. I’m willing to bet that you’re part of it, and it’s been a long time coming.
When the likes of Bill Cosby, Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly stood accused, I still don’t think anyone comprehended the scope of the issue, but the puzzle pieces of the movement were falling into place. Rose McGowan had been dropping hints about the man who assaulted her. Taylor Swift won a very public groping trial during the late summer. Ashley Judd was one of the first big names to go on record about Harvey Weinstein in the New York Times. Asia Argento also spoke out, daring to use the word “rape.” Alyssa Milano started that simple, powerful Twitter hashtag that’s spread like wildfire, based on social activist Tarana Burke’s underpublicized 2006 campaign to highlight similar issues.
#MeToo created a cataclysmic bam, bam, bam, bam, bam across industries. Those voices became a chorus, millions of women have joined in, and now everyone is listening — including Time, obviously, but also those with decision-making power within company ranks. So far, the chorus of voices both well-known and unknown have toppled Hollywood heavyweights like Weinstein, Kevin Spacey and Louis C.K., as well as other major names like Matt Lauer, Charlie Rose, Brett Ratner and Terry Richardson. The list of offenses and perpetrators goes on and on, now impossible to filter out of our social media and news feeds.
Before Weinstein broke, I used to do that thing too many of us do in the face of unsolicited advances: I’d let the rush of humiliation hit, and follow it up with a hearty dose of self-questioning. If someone’s touch or attention was unwanted, I’d rack my brain for things I could have done differently. It started when I was young. I remember my mom coaching me as a little girl on how to avoid situations that would make me vulnerable: avoid walking alone at night, don’t accept nebulous invitations from men at work, meet up with men in public spaces, watch your drink at parties, check in with friends to tell them your whereabouts, listen to your gut if something feels off. I know why she did it; safety has always felt like our burden to bear as women. It should have never been this way.
Before #MeToo, it never even occurred to me that it didn’t have to be.
Post-reckoning, I’ve realized my knee-jerk reactions are nonsense. What we have been conditioned to do in response to unacceptable behavior — laugh it off, let it go, get out ASAP, remember to avoid in future — suddenly feels wrong. Because of #MeToo, we can finally be empowered and emboldened to say, “Enough is enough.”
That is to say: Nothing has affected me the last 12 months quite like #MeToo. Seeing women’s all-too-common experiences come to the forefront, and watching those feelings be subsequently validated by action, has felt especially powerful in the wake of a disappointing 2016. It finally feels like the winds of change are shifting some cultural sails for all of us.
A look at Time’s 2017 shortlist paints a bizarre picture: Donald Trump, Kim Jong Un, Robert Mueller, Jeff Bezos, Colin Kaepernick, the Dreamers, Patty Jenkins. It’s an interesting, if illustrative, assortment. A cast of characters that almost resembles a good vs. evil showdown in a comic book. It’s striking to see the Time selection this year alongside last year’s title-holder Trump (this year’s runner-up). Yes, the magazine’s distinction honors influence, but in the aftermath of the election last year, that Person of the Year anointment felt a little like evil was winning. Some days, it still does. But perhaps this year the scales are shifting.
I wish I didn’t have to write about what a big deal it is that Time selected the “Silence Breakers” as Person of the Year instead of Trump. I wish misconduct had never been so normalized. I wish I couldn’t say #MeToo. But here I am, and here you are, and here we are all standing together.
In a way, this honor is for all of us. What started as a whisper, passed down through generations of women, has become a relentless scream — and the echoes are splashed all over that Time cover. For that, I am cheering. Maybe this year, “good” is nipping at the heels of evil.
Feature photo via TIME from the Person of the Year 2017 Silence Breakers, photographed by Billy & Hells for TIME. 
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What we learned from the Golden Globes: Meryl Streep always wins and Ryan Gosling never fails
The curtain has fallen on this years ceremony and heres our key takeaways, including the best anti-Trump speech, the wittiest mention of syphilis and what it all means for next months Oscars
Theres no stopping La La Land, the post-truth underdog
Right from the start, which saw Jimmy Fallons opening skit entirely devoted to a spoof of La La Land, it was obvious Damien Chazelles hymn to Hollywood had converted the 90-odd members of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association men and women who had left their homelands to travel to La La Land and pen their own hymns to Hollywood.
But just how faithful the converts proved couldnt quite be predicted: the film took seven gongs over the evening (best song, best score, best director, best screenplay, best actor, best actress, best comedy or musical), beating the likes of One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest to make new record.
Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone with their awards. Photograph: Kevork Djansezian/NBC/(Credit too long, see caption)
So how did they do it? Especially when some of the awards (such as screenplay) were felt by some to be a bit optimistic? Well, that opening sequence was also significant, because it showed that La La Land is a lot easier to parody than, say, Moonlight (black gay man in Miami struggles with sexuality and addict mother) and Manchester by the Sea (gloomy janitor returns home after the death of his brother to grapple with previous family tragedy) and may end up with a lot more cultural currency, even significance, as a result.
That the Globes split their categories (drama and comedy or musical) naturally favours movies such as Chazelles, but, as Benjamin Lee pointed out in his liveblog, every La La acceptance speech also pushed the notion of the movie as an underdog a crazy mad idea and a wild punt for the studio to back.
But remember: this is a romance starring Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone, directed by a man whose most recent movie won three Oscars, and which like Argo and The Artist strokes that hand that feeds it. But, whatever works.
Unless its the actual underdog
La La Lands main rival, Barry Jenkinss Moonlight, went into the race with nearly the same number of nominations, and came away with just one win. But what a win: best drama. The fact it was robbed in the supporting actor category (where Mahershala Ali lost out to Aaron Taylor-Johnson) may even help its chances going forward for what we now have is a genuine underdog (albeit one thats so far picked up 120 awards) with a little outraged momentum behind it (thought #JusticeForMoonlight felt a bit of a trending punt). The last movie to take just best drama at the Globes? Best picture Oscar winner 12 Years a Slave
Congratulations can still come with a bouquet of barbed wire
Despite significant wins for actors of colour actors this year, there were slightly fewer than expected (see Ali), and efforts to forget the #OscarsSoWhite controversy were undermined by not one, but two, people (George Bushs daughter, Michael Keaton) conflating the names of the two big nominated movies featuring black actors. Fences are still visible; perhaps Figures still arent, quite.
Meryl 2020
Meryl Streep attacks Donald Trump in Golden Globes speech
Can a blonde white woman in her late 60s defeat Donald Trump? If anyone can, Meryl can. Her speech picking up the Cecil B DeMille lifetime achievement award was easily the runaway moment of the night: impassioned, funny, fearless and picking up perhaps the prize dreadful moment in the president-elects campaign: his mocking of a disabled reporter on the campaign trail.
It kind of broke my heart, and I saw it, and I still cant get it out of my head because it wasnt in a movie. It was real life. And this instinct to humiliate when its modelled by someone in the public platform by someone powerful, it filters down into everybodys life because it kind of gives permission for other people to do the same thing.
Disrespect invites disrespect. Violence incites violence. When the powerful use definition to bully others, we all lose.
Trump duly responded, not on Twitter, but by telling the New York Times he hadnt watched the show but was not surprised that the liberal movie people ridiculed him. Sad!
Hugh Laurie for VP
A shock choice for supporting actor in a drama series over favourite John Lithgow for that other great statesman, Churchill but Laurie made up for it with a pitch-perfect address, which preceded Streeps and lamented that this was likely the last Globes ceremony. Accepting the prize on behalf of psychopathic billionaires everywhere, Laurie said:
I dont mean to be gloomy, its just that it has the words Hollywood, Foreign and Press in the title. I just dont know I also think to some Republicans, even the word association is slightly sketchy.
Viola Davis for secretary of state
A controversial one this, not because she aced the supporting actress performance for which she won her prize, nor for her great speech, nor even her composed anti-Trump rant backstage:
Viola Davis makes powerful anti-Trump speech backstage at Golden Globes
But for allowing us all to get a glimpse of the real Streep, sharing a strange food-shaming incident in her introduction to the great woman.
Streep: Whatd you do last night, Viola?
Davis: Oh, I cooked an apple pie.
Streep: Did you use Pippin apples?
Davis: Pippin apples, What the hell is Pippin apples? I used Granny Smith apples.
Streep: Did you make your own crust?
Davis: No, I used store-bought crust. Thats what I did.
Streep: Then you didnt make an apple pie, Viola.
Davis: Well, thats because I spent all my time making collard greens! I make the best collard greens. I use smoked turkey, chicken stock and my special BBQ sauce.
Streep: Well, they dont taste right unless you use ham hocks. If you dont use ham hocks, it doesnt taste the same.
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Accidents can happen, thank God
In what looked like one of the most locked-down ceremonies in years, a couple of bona fide surprises leapt out. The first with the HFPAs love for Paul Verhoevens hot-potato rape revenge comedy Elle a movie previously deemed too controversial for major acclaim. But it took not just best foreign language film (over the more politically safe Toni Erdmann) but also best actress for Isabelle Huppert: now a major Oscar contender, leaving both previous frontrunners (Natalie Portman and Emma Stone), fretting into their frocks.
The second shocker also showcased the Globess more offbeat taste: two big wins (best comedy series, best actor for Donald Glover) for Atlanta, about the citys rap scene. The Globes can be notoriously wacky this time round, in a good way.
We need to pin our hopes on the other Jimmy
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Fallon had a lot to live up to. In part because Amy Poehler and Tina Fey set such a high benchmark for this gig a couple of years back; also because Fallon patsied to Trump on his chatshow a couple of months back. But despite a few early digs at the president-elect, he failed to deliver. Most glaring was his inability to competently wing it when the teleprompter broke. All such issues were highlighted by the brilliance of some of the presenters, in particular Kristen Wiig, who having stolen the showin 2013 with her Will Ferrell double act, repeated the trick this time with Steve Carell. Can fellow talk-show host Jimmy Kimmel top it at the Oscars next month? Probably.
Heartthrobs are called heartthrobs for a reason
Ryan Goslings best actor speech saw peak metrosexual pin-up this year: losing nominees Ryan Reynolds and Andrew Garfield shared a snog, while Gosling further confirmed his dreaminess at the podium. He ended his speech by paying tribute to his lady Eva Mendes for looking after their daughter and her brother (who had cancer, and to whose memory he dedicated the prize) while she was pregnant with their second child and he was off twinkling his toes on La La Land. So, sweetheart, thank you.
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Tom Hiddleston, meanwhile, went full humanitarian, closing with a story about a recent trip to South Sudan with the UN Childrens Fund and dedicating his prize to aid workers everywhere. The weird cuts to Christian Slater and the kids from Stranger Things didnt help, but it was still stirring stuff.
The Brits are coming! But so is Netflix
Hiddleston won for The Night Manager, the Beebs big hit of the night gongs also for Laurie and Olivia Colman but the series-which-should-have-been-made-by-the-BBC-but-wasnt took best TV series (drama) and best actress (for Claire Foy). After the anti-climatic hoohah around Netflixs first big film production, Beasts of No Nation, the streaming service finally made good. Lucky, given The Crown still has five very expensive series still to fund and run.
Real actors are never off
Lithgow backstage with Claire Foy and Peter Morgan. Photograph: Mario Anzuoni/Reuters
Greatest ad-lib of the night? Probably John Lithgow, who channelled Churchill with aplomb in the press room. Being told his fly was undone, Lithgow quoted back the great cigar-chomper: Its not a problem. A dead bird never leaves its nest. The runners-up prize goes to Hugh Grant, wrongly leaked as the winner of best actor (comedy or musical), who describes the plot of Florence Foster Jenkins as, accurately enough, about a woman slowly dying of syphilis.
Read more: http://bit.ly/2j1gNUK
from What we learned from the Golden Globes: Meryl Streep always wins and Ryan Gosling never fails
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