#they're the last 'treat' im getting myself for a while I must be good now XD

[smashwolfen]

Got my hands on the blorbo plushiesssss XD

Been waiting for a good chance to get them all at the same time and it worked out finally! Right before a postal strike too here, I would have been so upset if they got lost in the system because of the strike skcjrbelzh

Now that I got him tho, I can do this to Volo XD

DESERVED

Some extra things to show too! Saved the tags with the other ones I got of the Submas blorbos, a Bonus Cynthia plush from the Masters EX line because she was very afforable!

And finally the different levels of containment, simple plastic for Irida, ziploc'd Adaman and absolutely sealed shut, taped and bubble wrapped Volo for his crimes, thats literally how they were when they came outta the package they were sent in XD

[kindestofkings]

dear john

elijah hewson x singer!reader

(ex!charles leclerc cause hes a hot red flag)

plot: its giving friends to strangers to friends again to lovers 🫶🏼

face claim: laufey <3

warning: spelling mistakes

authors note: this is for the lovely anon who requested a speak now inspired smau ! Hope this is okay?!? I was tempted by doing something on the vibe of speak now the song but imma think on it 🫡

yourusername

liked by charlesleclerc and others

yourusername wow last night on tour was something special 😢 to everyone who sangs my songs back to me and everyone who's supported my little dreams, I LOVE YOU.

view all other comments

lucydacus killing it !

yourusername luv you <333

phoebebridgers voice of an ANGEL

yourusername ooh stop im blushinggg

charlesleclerc beautiful as always mon ange

ynfan1 post concert blues are toooo real

wagsandstuff

liked by ynfan1 and others

wagsandstuff huh that doesn't look like yourusername to us.... did the couple of 3 years break up without telling us??

view all comments

ynfan1 nooooooo that girl on twitter was right ah

ynandcharlesshipper charlessss man don't do this

charlesfan she was always feeding off of him

ynfan2 she has her own career you do know that right? she a really popular singer

ynfan2 not charles cheating on our QUEEN

yourusername just unfollowed charlesleclerc

yourusername just added to their story!

lol gonna go heal my heart I guess lol

replies:

yourmum awh my beautiful girl :( glad you're coming home 💘

↳ can't wait to see you mam

yourbestfriend men are literal pigs.

phoebebridgers he's an idiot, here for you if you need anything

elijahhewson hey I know it's been awhile since we last spoke, but the lads and I are always here for you. I should've been better at keeping in touch, but I'm so sorry this happened to you.

↳ hey E, missed you! I'm just as much at fault, guess we all just got so busy with tours (both so successful heheh). where abouts in the world are you? I'm heading home for awhie maybe we could all catch up?

↳ elijahhewson deadly! myself, ryan and josh are home and bobby is back next week, call around whenever

inhalerfanaccount

liked by inhalerfan1 and others

inhalerfanaccount did you guys know that yourusername is friends with inhaler??? I found all of these oldies while lurking her insta !

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inhalerfan1 bless they're so young, they all must of been friends during school !

inhalerfan2 crazy to think they've all become so successful

ynfan1 wow my two worlds colliding

ynfan2 I've always secretly hoped yn and eli would get together

inhalerfanaccount friends to strangers to friends to lovers hits soooo hard

yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

yourusername time is a terrifying thing..

view all comments

yourmam I could probably find an even earlier pic...

bobbyskeetz I beg please no inhalerfan1 pleaseeeeee

elijahhewson smash x4

joshjenkinson_ the gang getting back together has 2024 winninggg

(liked by yourusername,ryanmcmahon_15 and others)

ynfan1 yesss bitch remind that silly boy who drives in circles of all the hot friends you have !!!

(liked by elijahhewson and others) ynfan2 hahahah eli woke up and choose chaos

yourusername

liked by phoebebridgers and others

yourusername turning all this heartbreak into something good ! dear john is the rawest I've ever been in my songwriting, treat her with love x

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ynfan1 so so incredibly beautiful, thank you for sharing

lucydarcus you're a wonder

ryanmcmahon_15 sobbing uncontrollably and ready to fight him

bobbyskeetz you good bro ?

charlesfan1 tough day to be a charles fan

ynfan2 omg those lyrics are HEARTBREAKING

inhalerfanupdates

liked by eliswife and others

inhalerfanupdates WHO HAS THIS MAN SO SMILEY???

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inhalerfan1 FOR REAL?? hes usually so moody

elijahhewson posted to their close friends!

replies yourusername pure stalker when did you take this pic??

vogue

liked by yourusername and others

vogue with just days before the release of her highly anticipated spohmore album we chatted to yourusername about love, loss and all things in between;

" you dont realise how easy love can be until you're with the right person. its the most annoying thing to hear when you dont have it but some how I was fortunite enough to discover"

find out what else the singer told us at the link in our bio !

view all other comments

yourusername THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME

ynfan1 shes so happy and in love

ynfan2 how can one person be so talented, smart AND intelligent

charlesfan1 eww cant believe charles used to date her!

ynfan3 love how shes not petty like the leclerc fangirlies clearly still are..

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername a year and a half ago I had my heartbroken, felt completed untethered and so so confused. today I give you my pride and joy!

this album features songs I wrote as a sobbing mess, some I wrote while I was healing and finally some I wrote after I opened my eyes and embraced what I had all along.

I love them all, I love everyone who worked on it with me and I escially love you.

comments have been restricted

yourusername

liked by lucydarcus and others

yourusername one single thread of gold tied me to you <3

view all other comments

elijahhewson hell was the journey

yourusername but it brought me heaven. bobbyskeetz gross yourusername child

joshjenkinson_ my parents

yourmam my favourite pair !

evehewson sobbing it was always meant to be

phoebebridgers the sweetest love for the sweetest soul

(liked by elijahhewson and yourusername)

ynfan1 OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

finished

authors note: ahh im a broken record with the friends from home trope but its my favourite 🥲 hope you all enjoy, please as always let me know what you think!!

[theultimatenonbinarynerd]

Choked In Confusion

Tw: Self Harm Mention, Heavy Angst, Self Loathing. Hurt/Comfort

This was the first-ever sander sides fanfic I ever wrote.

Roman was a mess, he had bruises all over his arm from hitting himself and red eyes showing that he'd been crying for a while. The creative side sat on his desk, he knew he had to take off his mask and write his feelings down. Patton had broken his heart he didn't know what the moral side wanted from him anymore. Logan always hid his feelings too. So he decided to pull off his mask in a more creative way. A monologue, he knew that would suit him a least he thought it would.

Roman conjured his feather pen and began writing his emotions. He wrote like he was running out of time. All the emotions came, he knew the others would scold him for feeling that way but he didn't care anymore there was no point in being what people wanted him to be. Anger, Regret, Sadness, Confusion and Insecure.  A knock broke him from reality, he knew it was Patton, probably wanting to scold him for laughing at Janus's name. He still kept his mask off as he knew it was time to give Patton and the others the wake-up call they needed. The King was everything they loved but then they split him and tried to create a creativity without flaws.

"Hey Kiddo, it's me, Patton can I come in?"

"Fine but not for long?!"

"Kiddo we-"

"I'm fine I have ways of getting my emotions, I honestly can't your first instinct is to come crawling back to me when you and I ignored every word Logan had to say."

"What doe-"

"He obviously feels unwanted and not listened to. Especially since he made his facts optionally. I mean I stood there and let you skip him. Me I'm probably the one out of all of us who drove him to hide and lie about his feelings."

"That's not we-"

"Right, you totally do, ever since the others started to desire being listened to you shut me and Logan out."

"That's not tru-"

"It is Thomas has the right to listen to all of us and not shun us. Go see Logan, please. Janus can apologize-"

"Roman you shouldn't have made fun of his name."

"I know! I'm an idiot I hate myself and screw up, when I make a mistake it's spat in my face but when you guys act rude nobody calls you out on your behaviour."

"Roman, kiddo aren't you over-"

"Overreacting! Patton, I have the write to express how I really feel and not have it brushed off, same for Logan."

"Alright, I'll go see Logan. I'll leave these cookies for you here but please understand we do love-"

Roman felt bad for rudely slamming the door in Patton's face but he didn't deserve comfort he just wanted to scream till he couldn't speak and then put on his crumbling mask as if everything was ok again. He thought by sending Patton to Logan he'd be doing something right for once. Roman nibbled one of the cookies and got back to writing his monologue.

After a few more minutes of writing down his feelings, Roman cleared his throat. This certainly was going to be a heartbreaking performance, deep down however he just wished someone would watch him and acknowledge his mental health struggles.

Lost I feel lost, from the day I was born I have felt nothing but lost. I feel like a statue that has to be perfect otherwise they're just filthy and an old rusting relic never meant to be touched. I am strangled by vines of expectations. Apparently, I was created to be flawless but im more than just a figment, im- actually I don't think I really know who I am anymore at all. 

Anger!

My voice feels like a cold weapon wanting to lash out when everything feels too much and when everything gets other whelming. I fire away but I can't stop myself, I am a flame of passion desperate to not die out. Life feels like thunder I want to strike and harm someone to cope but it's wrong. Justice, I get karma but the others never get it whenever they insult people and act mean.

Regret!

I'm fighting the urge to cut my throat and slice it till I can no longer speak. I feel so vulnerable myself so of course, I'm stupid enough to mock someone else in a vulnerable moment. A name defines who are you and what you stand for. I feel like I should be nameless. I hate myself so illogically I project my feelings out to someone else via name-calling. Me, I try to get better but I only seem to get worse. If I could turn back time I would stay silent and bluntly accept the truth that the world isn't black and white. My only wish is to take all those cruel worse and project them onto myself.

Sadness and Betrayal!

I feel helpless like I should have never ever been creative. Am I really that pathetic that the storybook ended sadly? Am I a hero! No, I'm nobody's hero everyone I've ever cared about have been pushed away by stupid egotistical self. My darling brother isn't evil he's better than me! He deserves my seat at the table. Janus is correct I'm a piece of trash that can be replaced it's not like there's two creativity's after all. Nobody has ever been on my side.

Confusion!

When was the last time I had an idea that was actually helpful? Even Thomas's fans think I'm useless and annoying. Back in the courtroom, I was scolded by Virgil and Patton for siding with the bad guy, the snake. I wanted to understand De-Janus especially since the others pointed out that I never treated Virgil with kindness. But no I'm wrong for giving Janus a chance, have I ever been right? Patton always gets what he wants and giving up that call back felt like I was having my petals picked off.  Then he decides to do a one-eighty and tells me I'm wrong for being the selfless Prince. Also, im supposed to trust the snake after being told he manipulated me and used me to get what I wanted. I was wrong to label the others dark. The truth im the bad guy, not the one who's being used as a puppet. Grey, I've never liked the colour but it appears I must get use to it.

Insecure!

I am the fanciful side, the ego, the passion, the good creativity. They we're wrong I'm a mirror cracked. I never ever should have been crowned the Prince. I'm not royalty I'm an earthquake bringing destruction everywhere I go. 

Janus was right I should have been crowned the Duke! I'm rude, bratty and pathetic. My fist reels, desperate to punch every single mirror I come across. I am broken! Who am I?

I'm an idiot choking on the confusion I feel.

A loud applause made Roman flinch, his brother was sitting on his bed, full of tears. He never expected his brother to be here especially since Remus had been told he's just like his twin. Warm arms wrap around him pulling him into a tight hug. Roman did not expect this he really thought his brother hated him.

"Oh, Ro-Ro, fate time hasn't treated you kindly. Part of me wishes I didn't knock you out."

"You did right you gave Logan his time to shine."

"Ro, Janus was wrong and even if have to skin all of his scales off to make sure he apologizes to you. I'll do whatever it takes."

"Thanks, bro but that won't help, I honestly feel bad for you, now you're stuck with Orange and we know he isn't a nice side to hang out with."

"I don't care at least I'm not stuck with a bunch of losers who ignore every single time you try to say you need help. Janus is a jerk, heck they're all selfish jerks."

"Remus I know I was wrong for labelling you guys the dark sides and us the light sides. We're all flawed but it's just too hard to accept."

"You know what you need?"

"What?"

"I think you need a job where you're allowed to be yourself and not strangely by people's expectations.

Ever since they've wanted us to be black and white but we're not."

"Wait bro are you proposing that I take your place?!"

"Yes I'm proposing I take your job and you take mine. Join me I'm not gonna let them bruise my self-esteem and confidence as they have done yours. Join me, let's work together and show these sides that we will no longer be controlled by their words. So are you with me or are you gonna sit here and stay silent. All I know is that you shouldn't go speechless."

"Nice Disney reference and I accept Its about time I crumble my mask! Thank you, bro I'm glad someone loves me."

"You've always been my hero."

The twins held hands and a bright flash accrued. It was about time the brothers worked together and stick together. Nobody was ever gonna separate them again.

Tagged: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @romanangstismyfuel @sandersidesfics @sandersidesfanders @romanvirgil @roman-sanders-appreciation-blog @romanocheesy @princemesscharming @lowkey-logan @misconceivedcapricorn @pwinceyroman @royalprinceroman

[punkscowardschampions]

Hathor & Sekhmet

Hathor: About to slap myself so you'll feel it Hathor: wherever you are ain't where you should be Sekhmet: what im sleep Sekhmet: 😴😴😴 Hathor: wake up 👊🏽 Hathor: you asked me to meet you, remember? Sekhmet: I think that's tomorrow Sekhmet: I said Wednesday, right Hathor: That's today Hathor: you blackout past Tuesday? Sekhmet: You're joking Sekhmet: well then, that means I've got a deadline I gotta meet and not a whole lot of time for brunch dates Hathor: you're joking Hathor: I cancelled on a fine boy for you Sekhmet: it's so early you got time to hit it back Sekhmet: I know I didn't tell you I'd meet you at the crack of dawn Hathor: you didn't and you're late af still Sekhmet: chill sis, I'll make it up to you Hathor: yeah Hathor: anyone else'd be offended you don't ever want to have a sober conversation Hathor: but I'll see you in the club Sekhmet: girl, chill 😂 Sekhmet: how fine was he that you're all kinds of vexed with me Sekhmet: don't even care how I'm gonna make it up to you, oh my days 🥴🍆🧠 for real Hathor: he's got prospects, I'm not saying any more than that if you're not coming out 👅 Hathor: I'll care how you're gonna make it up when you next show up for real Sekhmet: ugh! living up to your name 🐮 Sekhmet: bitch I'm busy 😏 the juggle is real Hathor: you know I don't say that shit lightly except once in a blue moon, however fine a lad be looking Hathor: but if you don't wanna hear it Sekhmet: is he 🧑🏾🧑🏿 Hathor: 🥛 Hathor: nobody is more surprised than me Sekhmet: 👏🙌 yay Sekhmet: I told you, white boys are the best Sekhmet: they treat us like 👸 Hathor: It's his Irish accent tricking me Hathor: I gotta take a trip back and cure myself Sekhmet: awh, you're homesick, precious Sekhmet: now it makes sense why you wanna tie me down Hathor: can barely understand him he's from so far north, more likely that Sekhmet: throwback 📟 📠 📺 📻 Hathor: get the psych dept to pull their shrink shit on me about it Sekhmet: You wanna be just like Vee, sorted Sekhmet: take my PhD now 💁 Hathor: be more disrespectful! first you stand me up and then put that out there Sekhmet: 🤭 you've got a ways to go, even if you're rolling mad extra today Hathor: I didn't ask 👼🏽💘 to 🎯 me up in the 🍑 Hathor: got my own things I'm busy with Sekhmet: love is magic 💖 Sekhmet: don't be complaining in my inbox when I'm tragically single Hathor: I've been serving and swerving him for long enough I thought I'd succeeded, there's the complaint Sekhmet: 🙄 you can't ❌ feelings bitch Hathor: white boys are a different animal, I ❌ the fear of Sekhmet: 😍😍😍 Hathor: I'm not here to be treated like a 👸🏽 if that's one step away from being called 'exotic' Hathor: there's nothing sexy about a power imbalance Sekhmet: most girls would disagree, babe Sekhmet: why do you wanna be run of the mill every day when we been #blessed with this 🔥 Sekhmet: all black guys wanna chat about is my light-skin privilege and their black man struggles, I can't 🥱 Hathor: fetishization like that ain't foreplay I'm interested in Hathor: 👑 me for other reasons than my melanin Sekhmet: insecurities SNAPPED, I'm sure he likes you for more than your skin, you crazy Hathor: he likes me for how I pour measures rn Sekhmet: racial Sekhmet: that's why everyone likes you 💃💃💃 Hathor: on account of being a poor student not Northern Irish, don't be biting the hand that feeds your blackouts Sekhmet: my white boys always pay Hathor: #blessed innit Sekhmet: 👸😇 tings Hathor: which white boy you with ignoring your deadline then? Sekhmet: whoever it is they've gone to work Sekhmet: but they left a 💳 with their cute note so I know I'm in a good postcode still 🙏 Hathor: so come meet me and spare mine, that's the right thing to do Sekhmet: just 'cos it's good doesn't mean I'm not lost still, damn Sekhmet: hold on and let me get dressed and get my bearings Hathor: if your phone ain't drained I can use it to get your bearings while you serve a look Sekhmet: who doesn't have a charger in their hoe 👜 PLEASE Hathor: you didn't know what day it was, can't blame me for 👶🏽ing Sekhmet: where would I be without you 😘 Sekhmet: mum hasn't phoned me in ages actually, it's so rude Sekhmet: I missed the last few but still Hathor: I hit her with your highlights, creatively Hathor: like how I won't mention a white boy making me feel like a baby 🐮 that can't walk Sekhmet: 😶😶 Sekhmet: dad would 😥 Hathor: and she'll 🙌🏽 harder than you've done Sekhmet: facts are facts Sekhmet: look at her dad, Vee's... Hathor: cliches are tired and stereotypes are damaging Sekhmet: @ your white boy with the 👋 then booboo Sekhmet: I think dad's in town working today, you wanna come for dinner with us? 🥂 Hathor: he's not mine to command in or out 👅 Hathor: yeah 🍾 will help Sekhmet: I'll teach you Hathor: those twin stereotypes are damaging too, like Sekhmet: oh hush, I only tried to 💋 you ONE time and we were like babies and that boy was the first great love of my life Sekhmet: anyway, you're like hot but not my types type these days, you know Hathor: that boy was trash Hathor: you levelled up fast though Sekhmet: awh, don't be rude, I have fond memories Hathor: I have loads of him trying to ask me out at the same time Sekhmet: oh yeah Sekhmet: I forgot that happened Sekhmet: his hair was gorgeous though Hathor: it was Sekhmet: good times Sekhmet: my new guy, not this one, the actual one, looks like old school Leo, I SWEAR Hathor: Yeah? Sekhmet: like Leo and a bit of River and Ryan Philippe in Cruel Intentions Sekhmet: 🥰🥰🥰 Hathor: love of your life material Sekhmet: definitely Sekhmet: he's a trader in the city and his apartment is 😱😱😱 Hathor: what's the age range this time? Sekhmet: he's only 26, it's mad how successful he is already Hathor: he sounds like the full 🎟 Hathor: any catch? Sekhmet: only technically Hathor: technically he's a 🤖? Sekhmet: ha, he totally has the stamina of one Sekhmet: he can keep up with me, almost 😉 Hathor: 👌🏽 he's perfect Hathor: fucking hell Sekhmet: no need to be jealous when you're 🥰 yourself Sekhmet: what does he look like? Hathor: Tall enough Hathor: more like a 🥊 than a 👼🏻 Sekhmet: you really do wanna do great grandpa Sekhmet: jk, he sounds so you Hathor: he does work for the main brewery that supplies us, maybe I do Hathor: Jesus Christ Sekhmet: 😂😬 processing that Sekhmet: not really though, every boy I've ever dated has been like dad, it's unavoidable tbh 💁 Hathor: in our postcode nobody's trying very hard to be anything else Hathor: 💰💳💎🍾 Sekhmet: why would they? Hathor: they wouldn't and they aren't, it'd be terrifying for any of those boys to step out Sekhmet: 🙄 you aren't going to throw yourself down a ladder when you're at the top, babe Hathor: wouldn't kill them to give other people a hand up though, they just act like it Sekhmet: 🥱 when's your deadline? Hathor: my work's done Sekhmet: then button it, loser Sekhmet: you wanna eat out on this nice rich boy's 💳 Hathor: ETA of 15 on getting to you Hathor: you best �� Sekhmet: way ahead of you 🛀 Sekhmet: door's unlocked, our breakfast will hopefully be on the table when you get here Sekhmet: love ubereats Hathor: 🙌🏽 Sekhmet: you can bring it through, the view in this bathroom is immense Sekhmet: thought getting the driver to bring it to the tub was unlikely Hathor: he probably would but it's unlikely I'd recover from walking in on it Sekhmet: 😘 Sekhmet: do fuck with an asian boy Hathor: you don't know he will be Hathor: might not even be a lad Hathor: but if it is, guarantee they'll send the most unexpected one Sekhmet: it usually is, your stereotypes be damned Hathor: what are you gonna bet? Sekhmet: the Belgian 🧇s Hathor: you're on Sekhmet: sometimes you shock me with how green you are, Hath Hathor: back to putting disrespect on me, what a nice truce while it lasted, like Sekhmet: I mean, you know I can see the driver on my app, babe Sekhmet: no points for guessing where Hassan is from Sekhmet: you can have the 🧇s anyway Hathor: you know I can read your thoughts, the playing field is level Hathor: and anyway I like green, that's my boy's eye colour Sekhmet: been gazing into them longingly across the bar have we🤭 Hathor: maybe Sekhmet: so cute Sekhmet: hope this one doesn't have a fiancee Sekhmet: or a maid who thinks we've broken in Hathor: if he does he better break that eye contact with me Sekhmet: I meant Mr Black Card, don't worry Sekhmet: he's a student, yeah? he won't be Hathor: he's only got a year on us, I don't predict an engagement Sekhmet: yeah, doubt it Hathor: outside of our family people aren't usually that extra Sekhmet: some of the asian internationals are but they usually cheat if their intended ain't here yet so Hathor: Yeah Sekhmet: what even does an engagement mean anyway Sekhmet: not much, right Hathor: a flash 💍 Hathor: what's my course teaching me if I don't know the statistics on how often a wedding follows? Hathor: shows how outdated it is Sekhmet: he gives me that anyway Hathor: I'd take a phone number and be happy with it for now Hathor: but it's probably the party and that whole flex too, right? Sekhmet: the dress Sekhmet: but it's irrelevant if it doesn't happen, like you said Hathor: 🎁🎁 even if it doesn't if people bring them for the engagement as well, but you're not going short of any Sekhmet: right Sekhmet: 😥 if you need a wedding for attention Hathor: Jay's birth mum QUAKING Sekhmet: omg I bet that's EXACTLY what his fiancee is like Hathor: does he ever speak about her? Sekhmet: obviously not Sekhmet: but she must never come up from wherever they're from because I'm like ALWAYS over so Hathor: maybe she doesn't know about this place Hathor: old school Sekhmet: Who knows Sekhmet: can't be my problem Hathor: Yours is the day you've missed, like Hathor: what's the assignment? Sekhmet: design some sportswear line Sekhmet: got to get the sketches in by 5, but all I ordered for me was a shit ton of coffee, it'll be fine Hathor: more productive if I stay or go? Sekhmet: you've already missed your date, you may as well stay Hathor: okay Hathor: am the sportier one Sekhmet: how are you 😂 Hathor: ⚽⛹🏽🚴🏽🥊 Hathor: why dad loves me more than you Sekhmet: now I know you're talking nonsense 😏 Hathor: True, he loves Vee and she never gets off her chaise Sekhmet: and she doesn't even love him back Hathor: poor dad Sekhmet: yeah Hathor: what time's dinner with him? Sekhmet: I'll ask him when he wants to go Hathor: about to come up, so whatever you were planning for Hassan, this is me Sekhmet: regrettably noted

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

This COVID

Unfortunately, the nurses and doctors are the ultimate victims and the worst part of the disease is their PTSD.

They, like most military, police, firefighters and EMT, sign up to risk their lives to HELP and SAVE others.

And they can't. This disease isn't intended to but is a by-product or side effect to cause them their own destruction of self, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

We have a website set up for them for their mental health -- it wasn't active.. Tree just activated it for y'all.

I apologize for that. So many people are calling them heroes and trying to lift their spirits and it is hard for them.

Like y'all...

Picture this...

Standing in a mass grave, trying to find a body still alive you can save... Help.. A mass grave... So I'm talking hundreds of dead bodies and then y'all be all parade and smile and have fun.

They're too busy trying to find a way to help. Trying to find that one breath from a body in that mass of bodies piled knee high.

They look up "oh them jets..." Same time that happens more bodies are being thrown down in that mass grave So they waist high...

By then them Jets have left just a cloud of memory

It doesn't help... Then they chest high with dead bodies... And they're getting buried alive trying to find a way to help.

Do you see what I'm saying? Can you feel that?!

Then they like man I gotta get outta here before I die myself, being buried alive....

Then who can help them? Is there someone strong enough to pull them out, to SEE THEM before the bodies are piled over their heads??

Doctors and nurses have committed suicide. Because they can't handle it.

Because what has happened... Is this is like a reverse WWII... Hospitals are now Nazi Concentration Camps. And the nurses and doctors are the Nazi just watching every one die.

(Note this is an EXAMPLE for the mind to grasp understanding -- i am not stating the doctor nor nurse ARE Nazi. I am merely making a reference to WWII and gas chambers and so on so people can get the visual understanding of the power of COVID and the pain of people that are opposed to Nazi. When she said "This is Real" it is where my mind went -- to the Holocaust which i know a lot about. I studied it on my own many times in my life. To understand how one person could take over the world. I did. In high school, my Oklahoma History teacher even took away my books because i would ask way too many questions about killing of Native Americans and i would say "but how--" and she said that i had a problem with focusing on the wrong thing and i said "but its happening in our world today!! Politicians and Governments!!" She took away the stack of books i had checked out on WWII and took them to the library and i followed her like pulling her jacket and shirt to stop her. She told the librarian I wasn't allowed to check out anymore books like that because I was a teenager and had unhealthy worries in the world. I burst into tears. "Obviously i have to save the world Because of people like you who won't take it seriously!! You're a Hitler yourself!! And you! I'll talk to you tomorrow!!" I spat to the teacher then librarian. And took off to my last class of the day. The Librarian know who i was and how i had spent hours in the library everyday during lunch and had told her how i said i wanted to compare WWII to the way Native American were treated in Oklahoma. And she printed a list of all the different kinds of books i checked out. Including kindergarten picture books for my own enjoyment. And the teacher apologized. She asked if i wanted to apologize to her for calling her Hitler. I said "not yet" eventually I did. In front of the entire class with an entire one and one eighth of a page of written materials comparing and contrasting her to Hitler and people we read about. I said "in conclusion, she may been an Army woman helping people make long disateraous of what they call walks. Of what i call pilgrimages, across many of what we now know are states, but not to be in charge but to be a comforting vessel during maritime war. A war that was unnecessary on water as it was on land and that is my meaning of using water words instead of land Because indeed i think she is a person we can trust but she may also be one of those people to set off a cannon to a far away ship until she finds out the truth of who is in it. But she certainly isn't a Hitler or someone that would order Native Americans to do the undeeded... She would be one of those to walk aside all Native Americans, help pass out blankets and medication. And so as she has apologized to me for firing up that cannon while I was away at sea to do ky research of course, i shall apologize to her for being upset she did and calling her the worst name possible. Which wasn't bitch. Nor ass hole." 10th grade, y'all.)

It is the worst possible place for a nurse or Doctor that signed up to be a comfort and to SAVE lives to be. The worst possible place.

And i can't help them... There is on the now activated website -- there is a place where they can request military services to come in and relief our nurses and others on the front lines, including police.

You just merely request how many and of what capabilities you need. So if you need just CNA (our hugest amount) or RN or PA or DR or so on and so forth.

They have their own pay scale thus allowing the people being substituted for to receive a special type of paid leave. The military can stay in one place at one time up to 9 weeks.

So also a rotation of 9 weeks on. 9 weeks off.

I apologize i thought it was already set up and available for all. But apparently things wanted to be done differently to try it and see how it works.

Now first is HOSPITALS. Basically if your name has the word Hospital in it. Then you're available. BUT you must have an EMERGENCY ROOM (ER) to qualify.

Now systems... Like Lovelace in Albuquerque has like 4 or 5 ER departments. So they go to the MAIN hospital first Then two weeks after rotate in at say the Heart Hospital then after two weeks the Woman's Hospital then a smaller so on and so forth.

Presbyterian, would begin at MAIN then go to Kirkland then so on and so forth.

This way if someone doesn't want to be treated by military. They have options of seeing regular doctors at the main stem branches.

Also it doesn't have to be a 100% but it can be a 25% so 25% of people take off for 9 weeks. Then another 25% take off for 9 weeks. And so on... So you'd have use of the military for 36 weeks.

It is a charity service.

I recommend that y'all cut hours. So a 40 hour nurse goes go 20 hours -- but stays at full time pay and benefits.

As part of our program, the healthcare and other workers MUST remain fully paid while taking time off. Otherwise we cannot assist.

It is for their hearts, their souls and their tears that we supply such a charity. Thus we cannot create more tears, more heartache nor more stress for these people.

So when making plans, hospital executives, please do keep that in mind.

Also for hospitals that refuse to relieve their workers, we have a system set up so that a nurse/doctor/etc can find a suitable replacement of higher quality according to paper. Similar but more advanced to the system that is used to place substitute teachers to teach hundreds school children per one jr high or high school day. And if the hospital rejects the substitute, then we have a system set up to sue the hospital on behalf of the staff. This system is only provided when a main hotspot refuses help.

Such as NYC. However NY has accepted thousands of National Guard already and Idk what exactly is occurring there but we have many side hospitals set up there.

So this is Never Before Seen shit since the Native American's Massacres (that's why i kept getting in trouble in Oklahoma History... The word Massacre.. Dude... I wasn't gonna pretend it didn't happen, Land O´ Lakes, where's our Indian Lady? The farmers didn't kill her, you did. -.-) and definitely not seen while we had this great amount of technology available to all.

So never before seen shit is gonna occur. I'm like yeah this is what will work professionally. And if they can't come up with something better and reject me, then I'll sue and ill win because they don't care and we got documented workers all over social media crying their eyes out.

She is the first African American I've posted but I've posted at least 4. Crying nurses. And i skip over a lot. I keep scrolling past a lot. I scroll past more than Y'all know that i Don't mention.

But her... She made me want to cry just like all the others. And Just like the others, i had dry eyes. Because we worked and worked and worked till we were all bawling our eyes out, taking heart medicine, whether like mine or just for heart burn. Even the little kids. I can't cry anymore. We made the solution for what and when the emergency pandemic would occur.

Hospitals have lost people due to suicide.

It is now time for me to step in. Or we will not have a doctor or nurse that is both alive and recognizable, they will be destroyed -- inside out -- starting with their hearts of mind.

I have had PTSD due to death of a stranger. I was only 18. And i hated myself for over 10 years.

So im gonna break out one day and call you all stupid for attempting to heal evil.

Because that was what I needed. And no one ever told me. And i got back lash. And i know that every single nurse and doctor that was working as hard as they could -- they needed to vent and hate. And i could be that person.

I smiled. I checked in. "Do they still hate me?" Yes "Good"

I know it helps a heart be healthy to have a place to throw hate. And i knew i would be safe from harm. While hate was thrown at me.

Then i took away me as that object of hate. And still healthcare workers are suffering and they're killing themselves. (They'll get to heaven if they deserve. A nice little break for them. Then they will come back when our other dead does. If they are deserving, if Earth is where they Belong. Otherwise they went directly where they Belong for Eternity)

So a quick fix band aid isn't it. It is as far as we predicted - a reverse WWII.

the sick going in... And causing innocent pain.

Instead of the innocent going in and dying by the professional purposely killing them.

This is the complete opposite.

Jack told me "quit hating on these nurses and doctors!"

Because i would scroll past and say "these fucking nurses. Dam it"

I'm not hating them. I'm hating their situation. I'm hating their inability to cope. Their inability to cope is because their inability to cope is due to their deep humanity... It is a character flaw. It is a curse and a blessing. It is the deepest and most difficult of work to breech that muddy waters, dig deep and find a bridge to drag up and build, there is one there in their souls.. But it is buried deep under much chocolate and flowers and all things good...

Unfortunately while being buried under dead bodies its nearly impossible to fix that bridge. Find that way to overcome the desperation, the HORROR their job has become

Even taking a break can sometimes not help... Sometimes it doesn't. But we include self care and encouraging messages from our military teams that substitute while the people take their time off.

Military are far more apt to be able to deal with dead. Military teams sign up knowing they must kill at certain times. They have a different view of death. They accept it and understand it.

A nurse or Doctor they fight it, that is their job. That is their souls and every hope they have in the world is to save lives.

Military, their job, is to make the world better.

Right now, military is just a better fit.

It's different types of brains. It is just different.

And I am sorry. And unfortunately I do know. I have killed a lot of people by hand, kidnappers caught in the act. I killed Pablo Escobar. Then I got amnesia. And I loaned my friend $500 to bail her boyfriend out of jail. It ended up in a suicide of someone he ratted on. I never got over that. It took a very long time. He was a criminal, yes. But I just never got over that loss of life. If I had never bailed him out... That one guy would still be alive.

So I am very sensitive and very understanding of these healthcare crying and not handling their jobs and killing themselves.

I fully understand it. So yes I will sue on behalf of staff that cannot get relief. I will fight and punch until those hospital executives come up black and blue saying "ok im sorry im sorry we can have substitutes and pay full prices for our staff to stay home and rest"

I may have forgot myself... Prior to age 15... But I remember since then. I know how I have suffered and why.

So I am extremely complex to know and understand.

It doesn't matter if you understand or trust me.

You must care and take a leap of FAITH and not one of suicidal consequences, hospital executives.

Because I understand being buried under dead bodies that I feel responsible for. Hating myself. For something that was never my fault and something I did to be nice. Naïve. I fully understand.

And its revolting, now looking back all I put myself through.

And I swore one day... I swore and I swore. I promised myself. One day im gonna use this all for good. That I can forgive myself.

I already did. I realized I'm not the one that needed to be forgiven. And I'm okay. I'm doing great.

But I remember and I will never forget those sleepless nights... The intense fear I had of myself and of doing anything for any reason. I was terrified. What if I go to the store and I effect someone?

What if I get in a car wreck and hurt some one?

I was terrified. Had I not healed thanks to JJFU. Some one I knew and trusted making guns and I said to him everyday for weeks "how can you make guns knowing someone could be hurt? Don't you think you will feel responsible if someone wrote to you and said a kid was killed with one of your guns? An innocent child playing by accident?"

He said "let me get back to you"

And one day he simply said "i can't control what other people do. If they don't lock up their guns or weapons and ammunition seperate. I can't control what a kid does. I hope no one ever gets hurt wrongly and unjustifiable with a gun i produce and make by hand. But, Sabrina, i can not control what other people do. And it isn't my fault what happens after the guns leave my hands and enter another's"

And this air i had been holding in since I was 18 years old just went out of my chest. And i started crying. And crying and i cried for days.

And he said "why are you keep crying? Who are you crying for?"

And I said "i am crying for ME"

"But why?! What did you do to someone so bad?!"

"Cause I hated myself for something I couldn't control.I hated ME. I refused to Love Me. I refused to Trust ME. And now I can cry for me because of what I Lost because I was an ignorant fool, to care too much beyond my control."

3 years later my friend was murdered. I could had prevented that, too. But I didn't get PTSD. Instead i chose to love him and be proud of him. And love us both for doing what was best for us.

I have both the obituary of David Galloway and Justin hanging in my kitchen. One gave me PTSD. One could have. I look at them both. And I say "I love me. But I can love you two and you can love me because I never wanted either one of you to be hurt"

Or I'll walk by "I can imagine you two are fine where you are today. Sorry I'm busy. But I hope you're happy and okay"

One is Zulululu and one is Human. The Zulululu, I got PTSD. He was a selfish drug addict that killed himself leaving behind two kids and a wife just because he didn't want to go to jail. The other was murdered and the last time I saw him, he asked to live with me. The latter should caused my PTSD. HE DESERVED MY PTSD.

But I didn't.

So military is better equipped to handle what is occurring in hospitals. Nurses do need time off even if the military does just set up new temporary hospital

Healthcare workers NEED treatment for what they have seen and gone through.

And I will fight for every single one to get the help they deserve and the time off they need.

Because I know they deserve it. I know they need It. I know how dangerous it is to overlook a simple day in the life of what they have had in the last few weeks.

Throwing them parties. Its kind, and it's sweet.

But it doesn't help anything, it doesn't help anything when the anguish and the PTSD has already set in. Sometimes it makes it worse..

So yeah I get pissed off they're not being helped and it comes out wrong.

So now its time to do it right.

This nurse asks y'all to stay home.

So y'all tell her you will if you will, tell her you can't because you got to go to work and you tell her where (like Gas Station, not the whole address) and y'all be responsible for you and your actions..

We can't control the world. But we can work together to make it better.... Right...?

I think so.

Or we're all gonna die trying.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

I love this girl. She make me laugh. She make me smile

And I know she's suffering and I know she's being honest.

But I feel and I understand her frustration and that is what makes me smile.

Y'all gotta watch she goes off on Corona and COVID -19 calling it a her and a she.

Saying she didn't do no wrong and she don't deserve house arrest.

I believe her and I love her for her pure honesty and raw anger and hate for the situation.

I felt that same so many times in my life for aliens and for situations beyond the means of the Earth.

People like her i been worried for. People trying their best But just one day its too much.

I worry because I'm like that myself.

While she seem like... A volcano... Realize she took herself outside. Yelled loud enough so the kids were warned to not approach her she needed her own anger time out.

And she yelled her heart and mind out. She yelled it so strong and powerful.

And for that i am proud of her.

I'm sure she went inside and gave them kids all the love they deserve and juice without making a pool.

You can send your kids in the backyard and play. I see there's a garage open... Let them draw with chalk and get out your pretty hair.

They're bored as you auntie. Idk if you're baby sitting or live in... But it seems like you got someone essential working, or someone other than you that isn't pulling "at home weight" as much as you.

Being in front of the open garage... Laughing a bit at yourself when you said you wanted to make lil girl a pool... Drinking.. Feeling trapped ... Just seems like Some one else is leaving every day and you can't. And if you ask me to look real good you was waiting the last few minutes outside for them to come driving up.

So you may wanna go pick up a Wal-Mart pick up order of grocery. It sometimes is a long line. I looked this morning and its all booked to Monday for my local one. But doing that will keep you in less contact with others thus ideally healthier. Then spin through the drive thru and take the long way home.

There's no law saying the stay at home personnel must stay home at all times. Just limited.

You wouldn't necessarily wanna go in the stores seeing as yoh are the number one to care for the children, auntie. As the germs are more likely to be there. But to do a pick up. Idk who else is doing pick up. We just have Wal-Mart here... But may be others,in your local area. Well pick up you Just verify its your order. Through your car window so it's very limited contact with one person and they load up your groceries and you sit and wait in the car.

At the same time there's no law you and the kids can't go in the store. Its just limited.

It's clear you're not going anywhere. You can go places. Just limited. I do believe you can get in the car and just go for a drive. Just get out in the car and drive wherever. Idk where you live and if they have a ban but here in New Mexico we can drive anywhere in the state. And hotels are still operating. So drive to the next city and get a hotel for a night.

Its okay in many areas to do so. Even in NYC you can book a room.

But if we have to social distance. And we are in our cars following traffic laws and just driving without getting out of our cars. Then we are obeying the rules.

Loop hole baby.

Many of us feel like our cars are as personal as our homes. So #stayhome would be same as #stayinthecar on a nice drive.

And she has a 3 year old. Its a perfect time to show her the neighborhood and let her get familiar with it and how to get to the store. Test the little one

So, then it falls under education.

Loop hole baby.

How a cop gonna be all "you can't"???

Now as long as you remember to say "we're doing this in case you get lost (or kidnapped) or get a ride from your friend's parent that i said you could and you can make sure you can tell them how to get home and/or make sure they're going the right ways to get home"

Then for sure a cop can't tell you you can't.

Just in case neighborhood watch don't recognize your car... And calls you in. And you have the little one repeat the lessons to you because you explain it So in case you do get stopped then they know what they are doing in the car with you. And the SMS if the cop check it will also notify "safe distance patrol" which means all you need is verification you live there. Car registration or ID is preferred. That is for a worried cop. What it does actually signal is "having fun let's join in, too" So, when or if you see the cop you can pull over and they can give you tips on being safe if the cop wants interaction currently they probably will not pull over because of social distancing. But all they're doing is saying "SMS notified action in the area. We want you to know if this happens you're safe"

Because home invasions will often use the victims car, if a a person inside is moving around or the cop senses something not,right they will pull over the car to double check. So an ID is the most preferred method and they will visually check all ID of all adult passengers if they choose but it is recommended.

So make sure you're following laws. Kids are buckled and you're going the posted speed limit.

If you're going to your house then back out and over and over.

This case im speaking would look suspicious. So you drive down to the 711 four times so they can memorize and no one gets out and yoh just keep driving that circle

Its how you need to teach the kids but it would look suspiciously to the SMS computer system and for our safety I don't want to override it.

I'd rather a nice cop check and speak to the kids and thank the adults for looking out for the children's safety and for helping them do their jobs.

Usually a cop isn't in protocol to pull over unless its a wreckless danger. So like if I'm a kidnapper I'm a trip out. And either gonna try to get away from the cop or drive super cautious.

So cops may do some Dick moves around you to check you.

So y'all teaching your kids how to get home safe realize the cop is trying to protect you and realize they are in practice mode they may not think so but you know they are. So they may pull you over and so you have already explained to the car what y'all doing. So everyone should be able to explain it back to anyone.

So otherwise just take a nice long drive to the next town and then turn around and just have a nice drive.

Take time to see sights you don't normally see. Or like say you been wanting to go to the zoo but you're unsure of the drive. Well there's no traffic so you can practice driving there so you learn that way to get there easy.

But #StayInTheCar.

I love this girl in the video so much i made a movement after her.

Remember #DriveSober

So staying in the car does mean drive through!

Get you and your babies a treat. So them Quarentine Loop Hole fries are all jacked up and down under the seat until for eternity.

So y'all Just let your family out. Don't keep your beauties locked in because it's safest. Get a little creative.

So babies with some chalk. Or in the backyard playing ...pick up some balls online... Like Oriental Trading company is cheap and i know that you can get a dozen of a variety of different balls. And jump ropes and all kinds of things delivered straight to your house. Chalk, too.

Now you could stay in your little square in the front yard but i would imagine the back yard is more contained. Something with a fence and that is just for safety and not so much about social distancing But just to "stay in the yard" and not deal with nothing bull shit someone bored can come up with.

So I know

.i been waiting... I been i know people are losing their shit.m. I need to see it so I know what to say or do.

So thank you, ma'am for being so public and raw and straight from the soul and heart.

Letting your frustration out so the dark grainy images of my imagination have a voice and a way to be visible to the needs of the world.

Because I'm not realizing what all is going on every where so i need my Soul Warriors letting it out to be known.

My life i go out and my daughter has been trapped in and she don't mind so much but last night finally i could take her to the gas station just for a minute late late night... We both had to wear masks... She was all "I don't want you getting sick" and so i told her "you need to wear one too"

Which i was glad we did because the car we borrowed is leaking antifreeze into the car and it stinks like Hell and a smoker it makes me cough like Hell so the mask actually helped a lot. So i didn't cough with it on. So after this is all over if i borrow his car youre gonna see me wearing a mask just so i came breathe unless i fix my car... And Idk...

So y'all if you're tripping or tense or even if you're not because you're just trying to chill and cope and Don't realize you're building up a bubble of lava

Switch it up a little bit!!! Y'all are all up in there together you know your schedules. Who does what and who dont do what.

Who don't ever leave.

At least open windows. Something. Switch it up.

Y'all essiential workers coming home to dinner made and a clean house... Y'all gonna come to a volcano one day and don't know why

Then you gonna make it worse all what the Hell? What i do?! You wanna go to work?! I'm doing all i can to keep this home together and you act like that?!

And mother fucker honey. You're gonna get stabbed in the throat.

The shit just builds. This is why I didn't like this plan.

It builds on both sides. Believe it or not the ones going out are worried about the ones at home getting sick. And actually about them being cooped in... Some are.

But i know without a doubt they're loving home cooked meals and the family all home and safe and the house all clean

Hello were in the 1950s

So yo let the adults trapped at home drive the car if they are licensed. Let them capture that freedom..sit in the passenger seat and be the host. Sit side way and make sure the back seat is being good. Talk to them. Give them love and attention

Let that adult box herself in to a space filled with love for the family and her have that freedom at the wheel

Because that is what it is. She/he running that home. You need to give her a break stop them kids from going on about auntie and momma and so on and give them the strong love and attention they deserve. "How was your day?" "You looking how to get to the store?" "What is that street name?"

Just let her be quiet and enjoy the ride.

As women that's all we want.

Control. Lol. And love. Attention. Help. Strength. Patience.

And I know men want the same exact thing.

But we need to switch it up. Add some spice to the bland. Or its gonna taste like lava and not lots of lova.

Y'all know i am the Queen of Lava.

And y'all going out. Make sure you're on time!

But take them stuck in the house out.

I prescribe no less than a 30 minute outing. I saw gas here was $1.58 on the interstate for regular. I know places like California and New York are lots more and i know some places are even cheaper. But point. DNA4U says y'all should be able to afford it. Every where it must be less than $3 per gallon for even premium. Right?

So #StayInTheCar and check out some low cost online shopping. They are essiential employees.

And love yourselves even if you turn into a tornado spewing lava hurricane

And if someone around does. Love them

Help them. Add something they need to your routine.

Its not too late to save a life.